Episode 2: The Becoming of a Mother — Matrescence

When a woman becomes a mother, everything shifts — body, heart, and soul.

In today’s episode of Being Mary, I explore matrescence — the profound transformation that happens as a woman learns to love, nurture, and rediscover herself.

This is an honest conversation about identity, exhaustion, wonder, and the quiet courage it takes to become someone new.

✨ If you’re a mother — new, seasoned, or somewhere in between — this episode is for you.

🎧 Now streaming wherever you get your podcasts.

Transcript

🎧 Episode 2: The Becoming of a Mother — Matrescence

 Hi it’s Mary, and Welcome back to Being Mary.
Today, we continue our 4-part journey through the stages of womanhood — from daughter, to mother, to grandmother.
This episode is called The Becoming of a Mother — Matrescence.

 There’s a word for the transformation a woman goes through when she becomes a mother.
 It’s called matrescence — pronounced ma-TRESS-ence. Or could be Maw-tress-ence.  I may not pronounce it properly, and It’s not a word you hear often, but it should be.

 It describes the profound transformation a woman goes through when she becomes a mother — physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

 It’s like adolescence, but instead of becoming who you’re going to be, you’re becoming who someone else needs you to be.

And it changes everything.

 I remember when I first became a mother.
 No one really prepares you for that shit .. oops I mean shift — from being responsible mostly for yourself, to suddenly being responsible for a whole human life.
 Your sleep changes.
 Your body changes.
 Your priorities flip upside down.
 And somewhere in the middle of the night feedings and piles of laundry, you start to wonder who you are now.

You love your baby more than you’ve ever loved anything, and yet — you miss yourself.
 The woman you used to be.
 The freedom you once had.
 The quiet.

 It’s okay to feel both.
 To feel grateful and exhausted.
 In love and overwhelmed.
 That’s the truth of motherhood — it holds contradictions.

Every mother I know has whispered, at some point, “No one told me how hard this would be.”
 And she’s not just talking about the baby.
 She’s talking about becoming.

The identity shift.
 The loss of control.
 The way the world suddenly looks different because now, your heart lives outside your body.

 When I look back, I can see how much I was learning — not just about my child, but about myself.
 Patience. Surrender. Strength I didn’t know I had.
 I had to learn to slow down. To trust my instincts. To let go of perfection and just accept the beautiful mess of it all.

 I think that’s why we need to talk more about matrescence.
 It’s not just a stage — it’s a transformation.
 And it’s okay if it takes time to feel comfortable in your new skin.
 Every mother has her own rhythm.

Some days, it feels like you’re thriving.
 Other days, you’re just trying to keep the baby — and yourself — alive.
 Both are victories.

 I remember being jealous of my husband getting to go to work and eat lunch in peace.
 Meanwhile, I couldn’t even go to the bathroom alone.  Who can relate?

 And yet, I’d look down at that tiny face, and feel a love so deep it scared me.
 That’s the paradox of motherhood — it humbles you and expands you all at once.

 If you’re a new mom listening today — I want you to know that I see you.
 If you’re in that foggy, tender season of finding yourself again — know that you’re not lost. You’re just becoming.

And if you’ve long passed that stage — take a moment to remember it.
 How strong you were. How much you grew.
 Motherhood isn’t just about raising a child — it’s about raising yourself into a new version of you.

 In our next episode, we’ll move into the next chapter — the season when your children grow up, and your role as a mother begins to change.
 That one’s called The Balancing Act: Parenting Adult Children.
and It’s a big one.

If you know someone who could benefit from this podcast or think would enjoy it please share this.  Everyone should know they are not alone. 

Until next time on Being Mary — keep walking and take good care of yourself, Mama.
 You’re doing beautifully.