🎙️Who Told Us Our 30s Were Supposed to Be Together? (AUDIO ONLY)🎙️

🗺️ You’re Not Behind… The Timeline Was Fake

Somewhere along the way, we were all handed an invisible checklist:

Graduate.
 Career.
 Marriage.
 House.
 Stability.

…and no one told us the timeline was completely made up.

This week on Twin Tangents, Anthony and Nalee unpack the pressure of “where you’re supposed to be” in life — and what happens when reality doesn’t match the plan.

Because between influencer lifestyles, dating app chaos, and the current economy…
 are we behind, or were the expectations just unrealistic to begin with?

👉 Audio listeners: if you want the full experience (including the looks, the pauses, and the “are we okay?” moments), head over to YouTube.

We’re talking:

⏳ Life timelines vs. real life → who decided where we’re “supposed” to be… and why it never lines up
 🧖 Self-care culture → wellness or pressure? when “take care of yourself” starts feeling like another obligation
 📸 Influencer delusion → luxury travel, curated lives, and the unrealistic standards we’re comparing ourselves to
 👻 Dating in 2026 → ghosting, mixed signals, dating apps, and the confusion of “what are we?”
 💬 Actions vs. words → why consistency matters more than what someone says
 🏠 The house dream → wanting stability vs. the reality of affordability in this economy
 🔀 Career detours → changing paths, starting over, and figuring it out in your 30s
 📱 Online attention culture → Snapchat chaos, unsolicited messages, and navigating digital boundaries
 🌀 Adulting burnout → daily responsibilities, organized chaos, and trying to keep up
 🤝 Support systems → friendships, relationships, and the people who help you stay grounded

This episode is equal parts reality check and reassurance — a reminder that life doesn’t follow a straight path, no matter how much we’re told it should.

Because maybe you’re not behind…
 maybe the map was just fake.

Quick disclaimer: This episode contains mild existential spirals, dating confusion, and a collective realization that nobody actually knows what they’re doing.

It’s honest, chaotic, and just grounded enough to remind you you’re not alone.

🎙️ Motto of the week:
 You’re not late.
 You’re just living in real life—not the highlight reel.

⚠️ Twin Tangents: Because Therapy Was Booked ⚠️
 Unfiltered. Unapologetic. Unhinged (just a bit).

Hosted by Nalee & Anthony—this is your safe, spicy space to spiral. Expect adult content, hot takes, and high-functioning chaos.

And yes, we call our listeners H.O.E.S.
 (Hilarious. Over it. Emotionally unstable. Spicy.)
 It’s not an insult. It’s a hoe-mmunity.

If you can turn a three-word text into a 45-minute psychological breakdown… welcome home.

Nalee’s Hypothetical Hotline exists for the people who rehearse arguments in the shower and lose sleep over imaginary conversations. Submit your spirals. We’ll spiral louder. And with microphones.

Because if we’re overthinking, we’re doing it professionally.

Love drama but hate being involved in it? Perfect.

Twin Tangents Court is our fast-paced spin-off where we judge everyone so you don’t have to. Dating disasters. Friendship felonies. Domestic disturbances. We try the case. We deliver the verdict.

New episodes drop every other Friday at 8 AM Central. Bring your coffee. Bring your screenshots. Court is now in session.

Pride Month isn’t just glitter and hashtags—it’s visibility, safety, and unapologetic joy. In our “Rainbow, But Make It Real” segment, we’re cutting through the rainbow capitalism to spotlight real stories, real love, and real respect. Whether you're out, questioning, or just vibing in your truth—we see you, we celebrate you, and we’re here for the real Pride. 🏳️‍🌈💖✨

Just when you thought the chaos was over—Anthony and Nalee invite you to keep the tangents going. With a soft outro vibe and one last wink to the listener, this post-roll points you toward the Twin Tangents website and socials for more unfiltered content. Because if you’re still here, you clearly get it… and we love that for you.

🎙️ Stay connected with Twin Tangents Because Therapy Was Booked
Unfiltered. Unexpected. Unbothered.

🌐 Website: www.twintangentspodcast.com
All our socials, episodes, and contact info live here.

📱 Follow us on Socials:
Instagram: @theofficialtwintangents
Facebook: Twin Tangents Because Therapy Was Booked
X (Twitter): @twintangents

💌 Got thoughts, tangents, or just need to vent? Reach out via our site or socials. We’re all ears.

Transcript

Welcome And The Timeline Lie

NALEE 0:16

Welcome back to Tangents, the podcast where tangents are free and life advice is optional.

ANTHONY 0:22

Today, we're going to be diving into the biggest lie society ever sold us: that by your 30s or 40s, you're supposed to have your life perfectly together and figured out.

NALEE 0:33

I know we've talked about this already as far as career, check relationship, check skincare routine that doesn't involve crying. Check.

ANTHONY 0:43

Meanwhile, most of us are out here wondering if eating cereal, oh God, I just did this the other day. If eating cereal for dinner counts as adulting.

NALEE 0:54

So buckle up because we're unpacking the chaos, the myths, and the absolute nonsense behind having it all together.

ANTHONY 1:02

Our first segment, the timeline lie. Let's start with the biggest scam of adulthood, the timeline.

NALEE 1:08

You know, the invisible checklist. You graduate, you go into your career, you get married, you have kids, a house, inner peace, all that jazz.

ANTHONY 1:17

All that jazz and all those lies. And if you miss one step, society acts like you took a wrong turn somewhere.

NALEE 1:25

Spoiler alert, the map was fake, y'all. It's a lie.

ANTHONY 1:30

It's all a lie. And I just said this. Was it a week or so ago when I was saying, I was talking about, I think that timeline all started in school when they were pressuring like college, and then then you get the career, and then yeah.

NALEE 1:44

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:45

What what did you want to address for this topic?

NALEE 1:48

So, like I mentioned before, I know we've talked about this before, but now that we're, you know, a year older, we may have different perspectives on life. Or maybe the same, but we're gonna talk about it regardless. Mine, I wanted to talk about self-care myths. So inner peace isn't mandatory, isn't a mandatory check mark. In my opinion, y'all crash the fuck out. Like it doesn't even matter at this point.

ANTHONY 2:12

And you're a professional licensed psychologist.

NALEE 2:17

M D A L S Degree. LSD. LSD, MSD, whatever. Crash out. That's okay. Crash out because if you don't crash out now,

Self Care Myths And Crashing Out

NALEE 2:30

you're gonna crash out later. So I heard this quote where it says, hard now, easy later. Or easy, easy now, hard later. So pick your poison, baby. Pick your poison. But I'm just letting all y'all know I'm crashing out. I don't give a fuck. It's crash out year. 26 is a year I'm crashing out.

ANTHONY 2:50

I think it's necessary. I agree with that. I think that it's very important to release all of that. I don't, I don't think I should have prefaced with this. I don't think that self-care is a myth. I think that it's very important to find something that you can do for yourself to pamper yourself or enjoy more of your time or your life or whatever.

NALEE 3:11

Yeah.

ANTHONY 3:12

But it in those instances that the anxiety and the stress and everything is like boiling and bubbling up in you, it is important to crash out, spiral, have a freak out, go on a weekend bender and drink all the alcohol.

NALEE 3:24

So I feel pretty attacked on that last one, but bitch.

ANTHONY 3:30

You have the right to. I think you've earned it.

NALEE 3:33

Yeah, I have. But anyways, yeah, I feel like sorry, that was me. I feel like it's not it's not mandatory. Like I know people in their 40s and 50s and they still don't have inner peace. You know, like they're still deal dealing with their own like shit, their own traumas, their own stuff.

ANTHONY 3:52

But I I was just to say, I don't think anybody ever actually has 100% inner peace. I think you can. I call bullshit.

NALEE 4:02

I think you can, but not at 100%.

ANTHONY 4:04

You could be a hundred yeah, that's what I'm saying. Not at a hundred percent. Yeah.

NALEE 4:08

Because I feel like I'm uh I'm at peace of mind, but bitch, I'm crashing out too. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 4:15

Like y'all two things can be true.

NALEE 4:19

Exactly. Two things can be true at one time. So I think that's definitely something that I've learned. But yeah, I think you don't gotta have inner peace. You don't have to please people. I think at the end of the day, as long as you're okay going to sleep at night, you're okay with who you are, that's probably the best and the most inner peace you're gonna have. Now, if you're a piece of shit and like you lie and shit, and you can't go to sleep, and like you're out here stirring shit up, then of course you're gonna suffer.

ANTHONY 4:51

Those will catch up to you. Like you said, the devil always collects.

NALEE 4:54

Baby. Baby. The devil always collects. Yeah. And I'm here. She has arrived. But yeah, I don't know why I said it like that, but yeah.

ANTHONY 5:05

Yeah, I don't know what that was.

NALEE 5:09

But yeah, it's okay to crash out. Life ain't perfect. Life will never be perfect, actually.

unknown 5:14

Yeah.

NALEE 5:15

Because it's always like the moment everything is going so good. Rench. There's always exactly. There's always something that comes up. And I think it's the best way to put it is it's not how it's not your reaction, it's how you respond to whatever is thrown your way. Yeah. Look at my MSD, LSD, MDA degree doing us some Doing us some services here.

ANTHONY 5:41

Yeah.

NALEE 5:41

Oh yeah. Pick your battles, y'all. Crash out or don't. Yeah. It's gonna come either way.

ANTHONY 5:46

What what is one thing that you do for your self-care consistently?

NALEE 5:51

Like, what do you mean?

ANTHONY 5:53

Like what's one thing that you do for your own.

NALEE 5:55

Physically or like mentally, or like all of it.

ANTHONY 5:58

Either. Either or. Whatever, what's something that you're like, you know what, I'm gonna do this or I do this regularly because it makes me feel better about myself and my life.

NALEE 6:08

And I almost sound like a creep or a freak. But I think I stopped it a little bit, but I think like tarot cards has helped me a lot. Like it kind of like mentally confirmed a lot of stuff for

Tarot Walks And Grounding Rituals

NALEE 6:20

me.

ANTHONY 6:21

Does that make you sound like a freak?

NALEE 6:23

Because like sometimes it could get too like it you could get too much in your head about it. You know what I mean? But I do that or I go on walks. I try to go on walks every day as much as I can. And then as far as like self-care for my body, I've really gotten into like my night routine where there's like fi I take like 15 minutes right after I take a shower. You know, I was telling you I put on like lotion and stuff. And then I recently got into body oil. So like as a combination, uh it's it's it's been magic. Like it makes my skin really soft. I smell really good. And I don't know, I wake up with like smooth skin, you know? But I love that.

ANTHONY 7:06

I love that for you.

NALEE 7:07

Just trying to take care of myself. I'm in my my feminine energy phase. So yeah. What about you?

ANTHONY 7:14

I do a lot of drugs. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

NALEE 7:19

You was not kidding, bitch. You was not kidding.

ANTHONY 7:22

No, I don't really think that I have anything like for the for like lately with winter. Um, but now that it's starting to get warmer out, I'll be able to go do my walks. And I really like I didn't even know this was a thing, but have you heard the term grounding?

NALEE 7:38

Yeah, where you go bare feet, right?

ANTHONY 7:40

Yeah, I never knew that was a thing.

NALEE 7:42

Yeah.

ANTHONY 7:42

But like I really enjoy doing that, like just going out in my backyard and just like no shoes, just go out there and sit and like rub my feet through the through the grass. So I can't wait for that. Yeah.

NALEE 7:54

I mean, you guys have a very nice background. Background. I don't know why I keep saying background. Backyard. Background.

ANTHONY 7:59

Thank you.

NALEE 8:00

Yeah. I'd I'd like sleep. I I would sleep out there. I'd I'd have sex out there if I could. Don't that's how nice it is.

ANTHONY 8:07

Don't ever, don't ever.

NALEE 8:10

What if I do? What if I say, hey, don't come out for the next don't come out for the next 20 minutes, please.

ANTHONY 8:16

I feel like I should get cameras now.

NALEE 8:17

You can. It's okay. You'd be like, oh, it's just Nolly out there. With a stranger.

ANTHONY 8:22

I know I used to work with a guy who I don't even think it was his wife, but he had this girl that he took out to a golf course and hooked up with her.

NALEE 8:32

That's hot. That's hot. Okay. That's hot.

ANTHONY 8:36

So what's your st okay, now we're gonna tangent. What's your stance on public sex? I fucking love that shit. You would do it?

NALEE 8:43

Yeah. If I don't get caught, yeah, I would. You guys, I'm looking like a sex fiend now, but if you know you know, that's all I gotta say. If you know you know, but yeah, I would do it. If I don't get caught, I'd do it. I think it's hot. Yup. Car, church. I don't fucking know.

ANTHONY 8:59

Church! Oh, the devil's gonna be collecting, baby.

NALEE 9:04

The devil already collected,

Public Sex Takes Over The Mic

NALEE 9:05

it's okay. Yep. Park, bathroom. The only place I wouldn't do it is the porta-potty. That's just fucking nice.

ANTHONY 9:15

So you would do it on a bathroom plane, but you wouldn't do it in a porta-potty.

NALEE 9:19

Yeah.

ANTHONY 9:20

What's the difference?

NALEE 9:21

Because you could flush in the bathroom, the porta potty you can't.

ANTHONY 9:24

That's true. It's clocking up here. It wasn't clocking for anything.

NALEE 9:27

It's clocking up here. Lay off drugs. Lay off those drugs. You know what? It's not even a drugs.

ANTHONY 9:35

It's like that 90s commercial. This is your brain on drugs.

NALEE 9:38

We've talked about this. You're getting stupider because you're getting skinnier. Stop getting so skinny. We've established this already.

ANTHONY 9:44

I am getting stupider though. I'm like, my mind. I'm just like.

NALEE 9:48

Yeah, lay off those drugs.

ANTHONY 9:50

I'll try. So like a fitting room at TJ Maxx?

NALEE 9:52

Done. Done. I thought I already told you. The old Navy at Mall of America. Bathroom.

ANTHONY 9:57

No. Oh shit. You had sex at the old Navy bathroom at Mall of America?

NALEE 10:03

Maybe.

ANTHONY 10:03

Was this with B? What's that face for?

NALEE 10:09

Nothing. I ain't confirming or denying anything. It could have been with him. It could have been with somebody else. It could have been with both of them. Could have been with. That's all I gotta say. It could have been that. Not with them, no. But Okay. Yeah. I don't know. I think that's fine. I think it's a healthy dose of dick? Yeah. Just kidding. No, I think it's a healthy dose of like I can't think of the word. I wanna say sexual attraction, but that's not the word I'm looking for. It's sexual something. Chemistry? I don't know. Sexual something. I don't know. I got sexual something. Okay. That's a song. Yes. Is it?

ANTHONY 10:47

Yeah, but it's what is it? Sexual healing? Sexual.

NALEE 10:50

I don't know. I've never heard of that song before.

ANTHONY 10:52

I'll send that to you too.

NALEE 10:53

I thought you made it up, but I'm like, okay, go on.

ANTHONY 10:56

It's an old song, so I'm not surprised that you don't know it.

NALEE 10:59

Yeah. I'm not surprised either.

ANTHONY 11:01

No, I agree with you.

NALEE 11:02

I think What about you? Are you open to that?

ANTHONY 11:04

Sexual healing?

NALEE 11:05

No, no, no. Are you into like public? I guess you did it in a Menards parking lot, so I think you're okay with that.

ANTHONY 11:10

Okay, it wasn't a Menards parking lot. It was a Menards employee parking lot. There's a difference.

NALEE 11:15

That's even better because there's more people that will walk by.

ANTHONY 11:18

Now I wouldn't do anything like that. I wouldn't do anything risky now. But back in the day. Back in the day, baby. I got it. Be like, ugh, good time. Stories. I know. I'm like thinking back now.

NALEE 11:31

Do tell. No. Okay, one story. I just asked for one story. It's not for this episode. What is the weirdest place you've done it at? That's uh that's it. That's the only thing you have to answer. One weirdest place. Too many? Give us the top three. Top story. Oh dang. You're free. No, I don't think it's that weird.

ANTHONY 11:53

A storage unit.

NALEE 11:54

What the fuck? Okay, I don't judge you.

ANTHONY 11:56

We listen and we don't judge.

NALEE 11:59

We love you and we judge. Um was this like a closed storage or was it like open? Or is this like a storage that's like within like a building? Like what kind of storage is this?

ANTHONY 12:13

It was like it was outside an outside storage. You know, when like you drive around, you see those like storage, those metal storage units in the thing. It was just one of those.

NALEE 12:23

But was it closed when y'all flopped, or was it like open? Oh.

ANTHONY 12:27

Oh, god no.

NALEE 12:28

Aren't you scared you're gonna get stuck? That's the weirdest place you've done a storage unit?

ANTHONY 12:32

Yeah, see, it's not okay.

NALEE 12:34

What else? Where else? What are the other two?

ANTHONY 12:36

Same question to you, Nolly.

NALEE 12:37

Hold on, but I want you to answer me first.

ANTHONY 12:39

Then I'll No, you said we said one. One.

NALEE 12:42

I said top three.

ANTHONY 12:44

After you said one, and I agreed to one.

NALEE 12:47

Top three.

ANTHONY 12:48

Top three.

NALEE 12:48

You only got two more. You only got two more. Come on.

ANTHONY 12:51

Nope, you just get the one.

NALEE 12:53

Lay it on us. So you're only gonna tell me the one?

ANTHONY 12:56

Mm-hmm.

NALEE 12:57

Okay.

ANTHONY 12:58

On the podcast, yeah.

NALEE 12:59

Oh, okay. Okay. For me?

ANTHONY 13:05

Totally off topic.

NALEE 13:07

Yeah. This should have been for our Valentine's fucking episode. I can't think of it right now. So I don't have one.

ANTHONY 13:16

Boo. At least I gave the listeners something to enjoy.

NALEE 13:20

Okay, fine. I'd say a church.

ANTHONY 13:23

You've had sex in a church?

unknown 13:25

Mm-hmm.

ANTHONY 13:28

Straight to hell. Straight to fucking hell.

NALEE 13:31

I'm the greeter at in hell. I think you're fine.

ANTHONY 13:33

What's that right there? Oh, that's purgatory. You're going farther.

NALEE 13:39

Yeah. I'm go I'm definitely going to hell.

ANTHONY 13:42

Where in a church would you have sex?

NALEE 13:44

Their bathrooms?

unknown 13:45

Shh, shh, shh.

NALEE 13:46

Topic over.

ANTHONY 13:47

Okay. Alright. So what else did you have for this first segment? You had two things?

NALEE 13:53

Yeah, I had another one. The other one was travel and lifestyle standards, like exotic vacations, fancy brunches, real life versus Instagram. Yeah, I mean, I think it's easy for people who have like money, who grew with who grew up with money, who has money. You know, obviously we have to work hard because we're like the lower class where we have to obviously work hard for our money, save it up, and then go on vacation.

Travel Envy And Influencer Illusions

NALEE 14:20

Compared to like, I don't know, these Instagram models or these Instagram influencers where they get to go to a vacation every other week or whatever. That like it's not realistic at all because traveling costs money, obviously, you know. And I feel like people make it seem like such a luxury or like it's so easy to travel or whatever, but it's not. Like it's it's very complicated because, you know, you have to go to the airport, making sure everything's correct. Again, packing, you know, and just everything in everything that involves traveling is such a hassle, I feel like, but it's the it's the getting to the destination. Yeah, it is very stressful. It's the getting to the destination and actually doing things. That's the part where you have to measure for yourself if it's like worth it. You know what I mean? Like some people, it's worth it for them to like go for a week's vacation and they pack a lot of stuff. But for some people, they're like, oh, that's too much work. I don't want to do that. You know what I mean? And it's not realistic. Like traveling and all that stuff, it's not realistic at all.

ANTHONY 15:23

I for everybody, you mean, right?

NALEE 15:26

Yeah, for everybody.

ANTHONY 15:27

Yeah, I think traveling is like it is a luxury thing to be able to do. It's just lost the allure because I feel like it it's become such a thing in society where there's like God, what am I trying to say? I can't speak today. It's almost become like it's an expectation. Like, okay, I need to go on vacation. Which, like you said, not everybody can just go on vacation. It it is truly a luxury. It is something that most people like us, we have to like save up for and plan for. And most Americans do have to do the same. So it's like, it's nice if you get a vacation once a year. It's unfortunate that we live in a world though where, you know, we have these social media influencers who are posting on and flooding, you know, Facebook pages, Instagram pages, TikToks, and they're making it seem like it's normal.

NALEE 16:25

Yeah.

ANTHONY 16:26

And I feel bad for how that makes some people feel, like me.

NALEE 16:32

I don't I was gonna say I feel bad because I'm like, y'all get to go to b Bali like five times a year to get sponsored by, I don't know, a makeup brand, and here I am working my 905, like not getting to do shit. I haven't even like stepped outside of my house. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 16:46

Yeah.

NALEE 16:47

I mean, I get that's probably whoa, I spat a big space.

ANTHONY 16:53

Yeah. Whoa.

NALEE 16:54

Whoa. But like, I mean, obviously it's probably an indicator that I need to, I don't know, change my career. I don't fucking know. You know, I need to do something with my life. But like, I want to live that life. You know what I mean? Like, I wanna, I wanna be able to do that, but it's just like it's not that easy too, you know? But then at the same time, it could be that easy. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 17:15

Um they make it look like some of the social media influenced and whatnot, they make it look so easy and like they they're living this grand life. Honestly, I'm I wonder how many of them actually are living that life. And I really wish there were some that would like show the struggles, show how difficult it is, show what you go through.

NALEE 17:35

Yeah.

ANTHONY 17:35

I want to make that lifestyle for me.

NALEE 17:37

Yeah, it must be nice. I guess I'll have to settle for OnlyFans. That's probably the only way I could get there.

ANTHONY 17:42

Did you start yours? Did you set yours up yet?

NALEE 17:45

I probably should. I need to start making that money. I don't know if I would make money though. That's the thing. Like, I don't know if like it's worth it.

ANTHONY 17:52

You don't know unless you try.

NALEE 17:53

I need to get skinnier. Then maybe I'll consider it.

ANTHONY 17:56

Start start out with pictures of your feet.

NALEE 17:58

My feet are weird looking though.

ANTHONY 18:00

Somebody is probably gonna get somebody off.

NALEE 18:02

I mean, super side tangent. The other day, some dude on Snapchat did message me to send me like foot, like, send foot pictures, and I'm like, what the fuck? And then I sent him my Venmo account, and he just never responded. I'm like, that's what I thought. That's what I thought.

ANTHONY 18:17

Oh, that's actually a really good tactic.

NALEE 18:19

Cause I'm like, it gotta come with a small fee, sir, of $500. Is that how much you asked him for? Yeah, I said send me $500 and we'll talk about it. And I was like, that's what I thought. But he was like such a bitch. Like, he was mean. Like he's like, I know who you are. And I'm like, what the fuck do you mean you know who I am? Does he know you? No. Remember, okay, you remember that day I sent you a Snapchat of I was like, Hey, is this you? Uh screenshot, and I'm like, hey, is this you? Yeah. Remember that day? Yeah. Well, I thought it was you who was messaging me. And I was just like, Anthony? And he's like, Who the fuck is Anthony? I'm like, I don't know. I thought it was you. And so then he was like, he was being a dick and he was like trolling me. And he's like, I know who you are. And I'm like, no, you don't. And then he started writing these weird words. Come to find out it was like pronunciations of like Chinese words and stuff like that. I'm like, bro, I ain't even Chinese. Like, I don't know what you're talking about. And then like, yeah, and then like two minutes later, he's like, send me a photo of your foot. I'm like, what the fuck? Like, I don't even know you. If you know me, then you should know me. I'm confused. And so then he was like saying all this shit, and then I was just like, I don't fucking know you, bro. And then he's like, send me send me some foot pictures, whatever. And I was like, okay, sure. And then I sent him my Venmo. I'm like, $500, and then we'll talk about this. And he just stopped messaging me and I'm like, that's what I fucking thought. Send me my mun.

ANTHONY 19:34

Okay, I have a question. How are you finding these people on Snapchat?

NALEE 19:38

They added me.

ANTHONY 19:39

So just random people are adding you?

NALEE 19:41

Yeah, they added me. And I didn't, that's the thing. I didn't know because I didn't know that I didn't need to add them, which I'm fucking stupid. But he added me randomly on Facebook uh on Snap, and I'm like, what the fuck? Like, who who is this? And then he messaged me, and then I was like, oh, okay, I know. And then I mean not you, not that you're old.

ANTHONY 20:03

Bitch, I didn't even attach that.

NALEE 20:05

I didn't I didn't even like, I didn't even think it to sit. I didn't I didn't even yeah. But anyways, he randomly added me and I didn't know that you could like reject that, which again, I'm I was saying yeah, because I'm also old too. I don't know how to fucking touch it. And so then I accepted it, and then that's when he started messaging me. I'm like, who the fuck are you? Like, and I'm like, I'm not even Chinese, bro. I don't even understand that. He's like, yeah, I'm sure. I know who you are. And I'm like, then pull the fuck up. Show me a base.

ANTHONY 20:31

Pull the fuck up.

NALEE 20:32

Who are you? Jesus? Is that you? I'm going to Hellar Radio. It's me, Margaret. It's me, Jessica.

SPEAKER_03 20:42

Ugh.

NALEE 20:42

But yeah. Anyways, it was it was fucking stupid, but I was like, these people are fucking dumb. Back to what we were talking about. What were we talking about?

ANTHONY 20:50

Yeah, what were we talking about?

NALEE 20:52

I don't know.

ANTHONY 20:53

Traveling and social media influencers and yeah, but making it look oh OnlyFans.

NALEE 21:00

But yeah, I don't know. Let's do a poll on that. Should I do an OnlyFans, guys?

ANTHONY 21:04

Watch our numbers start like going up.

NALEE 21:07

Or going down. It could it could complete me.

ANTHONY 21:10

If our numbers go down, Nolly, cutting you off. I'm gonna be a solo podcaster.

NALEE 21:15

Yeah, this is all yours now. But yeah, let me know, guys. Should I do an OnlyFans? Who would subscribe? I'm just kidding. I ain't doing that shit. The fuck? You would subscribe to me?

ANTHONY 21:25

No.

NALEE 21:26

Light ass. I know that was a name lie. You're like, yeah, I would. I wanna see what's under that hood.

ANTHONY 21:32

I want to see what's under that hood. No, I wouldn't because you're my friend. If you weren't my friend, I probably would.

NALEE 21:37

Good. Keep that integrity.

ANTHONY 21:38

As long as I didn't have to pay.

NALEE 21:40

As long as you didn't Nah, bitch. This thing for free. No, no. But yeah.

ANTHONY 21:45

Why don't you do a free OnlyFans with like sample photos and then charge for me? I don't know.

NALEE 21:55

I don't know. It sounds too complicated. I started my tarot stuff and I haven't even Done any new videos in like two weeks. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 22:04

Yeah, I've noticed that. I haven't seen one for you.

NALEE 22:09

Well, that's because like I'm packing and shit. So I don't have time to like.

ANTHONY 22:12

You know what they say? Find a job that you love and you never have to work a day in your life.

NALEE 22:17

Yeah, that's true.

ANTHONY 22:18

Maybe taking porn picks is your Maybe I'll make that dream come true.

NALEE 22:23

I don't know. All right, y'all. All right.

ANTHONY 22:24

Who's gonna be my partner? We want Nolly to sign up for who's gonna be my partner?

NALEE 22:28

Come out. Come out.

ANTHONY 22:29

A partner for what?

NALEE 22:30

Tommy Lee. I don't know.

ANTHONY 22:32

Oh, you want to get dicked down.

NALEE 22:35

Period.

ANTHONY 22:36

Oh, okay.

NALEE 22:38

I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.

ANTHONY 22:40

Uh no, you're not.

NALEE 22:41

No, you're not. Yeah, yeah. Anyways, what's it?

ANTHONY 22:44

Anyways.

NALEE 22:46

Yeah, well, anyways, those influencers who travel and make it seem like it's like super fun and luxuries, luxurious or luxurious and stuff. Like, teach me. Teach me. Teach me how to do it. Like Lexi in Gray's Anatomy to Mark Salone. Teach me. Teach me. That's that's the kind of teach me that I want. Teach me.

ANTHONY 23:08

You just want McSimi teaching you.

NALEE 23:11

Oh, don't even talk about him.

ANTHONY 23:13

You're the one who brought him up.

NALEE 23:15

I know.

ANTHONY 23:16

This bitch.

NALEE 23:16

Crashing out 101.

ANTHONY 23:18

Okay. Well, let's go on to my topic for this segment.

NALEE 23:22

What are your top text?

ANTHONY 23:24

Yeah. So my first one was career detours in your 30s. Changing paths, changing passions late in life. You just mentioned this, I think it was last episode that we did, where you you had mentioned some quote that's out there, like it's never too late. Like if you failed in your 30s, like what's that quote? Do you know?

NALEE 23:48

I don't remember, but I made up random numbers.

Career Detours With A Real Plan

NALEE 23:50

It's like you can you can quit at 33, you can get divorced at 35, you can start a new job at 40, and you can have, I don't know, a baby daddy at 50. Yawnologist.

ANTHONY 24:02

I don't think people are ever really too old to like consider changing their path, especially if they're unhappy. I agree with that.

NALEE 24:10

I agree with that, but I think they have to be strategic about it. Like you can't just quit your job and not do like do anything. Uh-huh. Like you have to like think about it. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 24:20

100%. Like, is what you want to do, do you like, does it require a degree? Do you have that degree?

NALEE 24:26

Yeah. Or if you have a family of like five kids and you want to start a new degree, is your wife working? Like, you know, like do you have is it a good are you in a good position to change that? You know what I mean? Yeah.

ANTHONY 24:39

So you have to be strategic about, especially, I feel like you have to really weigh out all the factors and you can't just be impulsive.

NALEE 24:48

Yeah. Period. And if you're impulsive, you're stupid.

unknown 24:52

I'm just kidding.

ANTHONY 24:54

Wow. You are trying to alienate our list our 18 listeners.

NALEE 24:59

I'm just kidding. I'm just saying some people who are some people who are impulsive who don't think before they do. They just they end up fucking up their lives. So you just gotta get it.

ANTHONY 25:12

You're putting me on blast in front of everybody right now.

NALEE 25:14

It ain't about you, boo. I know you got your shit together. I ain't gotta worry about you for another like, I don't know, 15 years. Shit.

ANTHONY 25:21

I ain't got shit together.

NALEE 25:23

I mean that in the like nicest way possible. 15 years.

ANTHONY 25:27

Fifteen years. We'll see where I'm at.

NALEE 25:30

We're gonna be rich. We're gonna get that lottery, and we're gonna be rich, and we're gonna be in Florida.

ANTHONY 25:36

So I hope so. I'm ready for it.

NALEE 25:38

It's gonna happen. It's gonna happen.

ANTHONY 25:40

Would you ever consider changing careers?

NALEE 25:44

Right now. Becoming a porn star in the next couple of years. Good for you. I'm just kidding. No. I would consider changing my career though. I s I would say, especially with all the changes that is happening in my life right now that I have no control over. I think if I change my career, at least I have control of that.

ANTHONY 26:01

You know what I mean? So what would you consider changing too?

NALEE 26:05

Like for me, I'm like a plant A, B, and C D person, like I told you. So I think obviously, you know, I've been trying to con pursue my like nail stuff, but because of stupid situations and stuff, I couldn't get that taken care of. So I think that's probably the first thing that I'm gonna get done before I do anything else. If not, I really want to get into like business, like business management or something like that, so that I could have my own business.

ANTHONY 26:34

So you think you might you would go back to school?

unknown 26:38

I don't know.

NALEE 26:39

I hate school. I think for the nail stuff, yes, I'm gonna have to. But as far as like business-wise, I think I'm just gonna take some classes. I'm not gonna get like a whole degree. Because at this point, you don't really need a whole degree. You just have to kind of know how to manage your stuff, you know what I mean? Right. If I want to have my own like company or if I want to have like my own business, that I just need to take a couple of classes that are like core on like, I don't know, business management, bookkeeping, and a couple of other things. I don't need a whole last degree for that.

ANTHONY 27:09

Yeah. That's true. I mean, if you're planning on starting your own business.

NALEE 27:13

Yeah. I mean, I don't know. I'm a little lost right now. I'm still in bloom. So we never know.

ANTHONY 27:19

You're still in that little pot and you're starting to sprout.

NALEE 27:22

Yeah.

ANTHONY 27:23

And you're just like, boing.

NALEE 27:24

My little wiener is just starting to to pop up from the brown.

ANTHONY 27:28

Oh my god. Your little wiener.

NALEE 27:30

My little wiener. My pee-pee, my pussy palace, is just slowly starting to pop up.

ANTHONY 27:38

Your Venus flytrap.

NALEE 27:40

Yeah, that's pretty much what she is right now. Yep.

ANTHONY 27:41

It's got the teeth and everything.

NALEE 27:45

No, her teeth are slowly growing. I don't know where we're going with this. What's your next topic?

ANTHONY 27:55

My next topic was buying a house. The dream versus actual affordability.

NALEE 28:00

Child, just rent, y'all. Just rent.

ANTHONY 28:03

I this this is kind of on topic with this. I watched a video the other day. It was a TikTok, and it was from I want to say like 1994, 1993, and it was like actual live

Buying A House Versus Renting

ANTHONY 28:21

family video footage.

NALEE 28:23

Okay. Of you?

ANTHONY 28:25

No, not of me.

NALEE 28:26

Oh, wait, you said TikTok.

ANTHONY 28:27

It was on TikTok, and it was basically, it must have been like Christmas or something, the holidays, and somebody had just gotten one of those old like VHS recorder recording cameras for Christmas. And so they were recording everything. They recorded their trip to McDonald's, and they were like, oh, we're gonna take three uh three Big Macs with extra cheese and uh orange or a strawberry shake, and then what does the kid want? Oh, he wants 10-piece chicken McNugget or a chicken McNugget kids' meal with an orange soda, and then the wife got her sandwich and got so good right now. $11.

NALEE 29:09

Yeah.

ANTHONY 29:09

And it's like now you go to McDonald's and it's like $10 for one fucking burger.

NALEE 29:14

It's $10 for 10 pieces of chicken nuggets.

ANTHONY 29:16

See? Like it's just crazy the prices of things and like especially houses. You know, people used to be able to buy houses for $20,000, $30,000.

NALEE 29:28

Yeah.

ANTHONY 29:29

And personally, I really would like to experience purchasing a house at some point in my life. I don't know if it'll ever happen. That's one of those things that's like on my bucket list of things to do.

NALEE 29:42

I feel like you necessarily don't need to, because I think, you know, but I think going through the experience of it, I think it's definitely one of those things where you feel like, oh, like I accomplished something. You know, like, oh, I do this on my own.

ANTHONY 29:53

It's like well, plus, and it's like an adult milestone, right?

NALEE 29:57

But I will say, yes, that's very true. I will say though, like just with our economy right now, how the pricing of housing and stuff is, like, I'm I'm telling you guys, with my unsolicited professional LSD, MDA degree and having a house, right now, I don't think it's worth it having a house. Because unless you can afford it, great. Unless you have like money, I don't know, at least 50 grand saved up, like, do it. More power to you. But if you are like living paycheck to paycheck and, you know, you're trying to buy a house, and I'm speaking this from like my experience. There is so much things that go into getting a house because you have to think about upgrades that you have to do in order for it to be livable. You have to think about if a tree hits your fucking house, are you gonna be able to like afford to fix that? And you know, little things, you know, it it's a it's a big responsibility. And unless you're not ready for that, don't do it. Because compared to renting, usually renting, yes, you still pay for about the same amount, but you don't have to worry about maintenance, you don't have to worry about fixing anything. You just don't have to worry about like things being broken. That is the responsibility of whoever you're renting from, and that already takes responsibility from you. You know what I mean? Yeah. So in my professional unsolicited, again, LSD MDA degree, I feel like if you could rent right now, I think that's probably the smartest choice. Obviously, if the economy like gets better or whatever and you could afford it, do it. But right now, like in our day and age, buying a house is not realistic at all.

ANTHONY 31:38

But it's also not even just like the economy, it's also like our minimum wage like hasn't gone up.

NALEE 31:44

Exactly.

ANTHONY 31:45

And how long? And you know, you said it, mo most Americans were living paycheck to paycheck. So it's like Yeah. It's not, it's just not worth it at this point. And and I think we've discussed this before, how it's like the, or I've said it at the very least, that the American dream of going to college, getting a degree, getting that career, getting the house, like it's not feasible. It's not realistic anymore.

NALEE 32:12

Oh, a hundred percent. Like again, speaking from experience, like my life has been up and down, up and down, up and down, down, up and then down, up and down, up and down.

ANTHONY 32:23

You know, like it And not in the good way.

NALEE 32:25

Not in a good way. No. Well, yeah. But you know, like y'all, all I gotta say right now is this is like super, like, I don't know where this is coming from, but I think at this point, just do what makes you happy. Like, stop following the the the trends, stop following like social media, like lifestyle. Stop stop following like those pre-planned lifestyles. Like, do what's easier for you, do what makes sense for you. Even if it's not the the normal, do it. It's fine. Like, yeah, the normal for you, maybe not the same normal for somebody else. You know what I mean? At the end of the day, again, if you really want the inner peace, do what makes you happy.

ANTHONY 33:12

Listen to yourself, listen to your insides. Listen to your insides, listen to your insides, listen to your inside voice.

NALEE 33:19

Yeah, listen to your inside. Listen to your gut.

ANTHONY 33:21

Yeah, I agree with that.

NALEE 33:23

Life is hard, y'all. Life is fucking hard. Do you have another topic?

ANTHONY 33:27

No, that was both of mine.

NALEE 33:29

Oh, nice. Okay. Well, so even if the people who look like they have it all together, like me and Anthony here, yeah, we don't. We don't got it together. Literally. That's why we got a podcast. We don't we got none together.

ANTHONY 33:42

Literally, if anybody in our lives feels or thinks that we have it together, I'm scared for them.

NALEE 33:49

Or we're just really good at acting. I don't fucking know.

ANTHONY 33:52

Yeah. Well, I think we're I think that's what it is. We're very good at acting.

NALEE 33:55

Like that post that I shared the other day. Sorry, like the post that I shared the other day where

Oscar Level Acting Through Adulthood

NALEE 34:00

it says everybody deserves an Oscar for how well they're acting, like everything is okay. That is so fucking true.

ANTHONY 34:05

Yeah. Give me the fucking Oscar. I still show up to work.

NALEE 34:11

I should get three Oscars at this point. Literally. I should get three Oscars at this point.

ANTHONY 34:16

I just can't even. Now I'm thinking about all the things. But remember, some people just have better lighting and more filters.

NALEE 34:24

AK me. Anyways, meanwhile, everyone is panic googling taxes, trying new hobbies unsuccessfully, or crying in the shower like I was the other day. So it's okay, y'all. We in this together.

ANTHONY 34:38

Did you cry in the shower the other day?

NALEE 34:39

Yeah, but not like because I was sad.

ANTHONY 34:42

All right.

NALEE 34:42

Well because I like burnt my skin.

ANTHONY 34:44

All right. Well, let's unpack the hidden chaos of adulting and we're gonna get right back into that. Because I'm uh confused as fuck.

NALEE 34:53

What do you mean? Let's unpack this right now.

ANTHONY 34:55

Let's unpack it right now then. Okay, so what are you talking about? You burnt your skin?

NALEE 34:58

Yeah, because my hot water is like really fucking hot. Yeah.

ANTHONY 35:01

And you were crying because of that?

NALEE 35:02

Yeah, because it hurt. You burnt my leg. Why didn't you Because it was hot. It's like over there, you know? So I have to go through the water to get to the faucet thingy, you know? Oh, my arms are so jiggly. Anyways.

ANTHONY 35:16

Oh, same. I know. It's like Yeah.

NALEE 35:18

Hi. Yeah.

The Shower Burn Disaster Debrief

NALEE 35:20

Yeah, it was it hurt. And I'm not tall enough to move the shower head.

ANTHONY 35:25

So Do you not test your water before you get in the shower?

NALEE 35:28

I do. That's what happened. So I had turned the shower on. I usually let it run a little bit so that the water warms up, right? But I didn't realize that like I put the cold water a little too low. So the water was really fucking hot. And so I didn't I didn't test it because I'm like, oh, normally, like I don't need to test it. And so then I would, I usually, I know I'm fucking stupid.

ANTHONY 35:49

I literally just asked you if you tested it, and you're like, yeah, I did.

NALEE 35:54

Another day I'm showing you guys how stupid I am. But, anyways, surprise. Yeah, I didn't test the water actually. But well, you know what? In my defense, I don't normally need to. But that day, for some reason, the water was I think it's because I had the the washer running and you know, like the water pressure or whatever. It's like it's off. And so then I didn't think that it was gonna be like super hot. And so then I went in and then I like stepped into the water and it fucking burned my leg. And I was literally standing there and I'm like, I can't reach the faucet and I'm still burning. But now that I think of it, my dumb ass could have just gotten out of the shower and like adjusted it like how I did before, and then go back into the shower. But I was also lazy, so I was like purposely burning myself while switching the fucking faucet. I love it. The eye effect, the eye effect that you have looks so scary. No, that looks really scary. Anthony!

ANTHONY 37:08

I can't with you. I love how you're like, now that I think about it, I probably could have gotten out of the shower. That's what I was thinking the entire time.

NALEE 37:15

You guys, Anthony, this shouldn't be a surprise to you.

ANTHONY 37:18

You're so pretty.

NALEE 37:19

I'm pretty. You're pretty and can't do anything about it.

ANTHONY 37:23

That's what I tell Duffy too.

NALEE 37:24

Duffy's really pretty. He looks kind of delicious too. You fatten him up a little bit and then you give him to me.

ANTHONY 37:30

He's lost a pound.

NALEE 37:32

Did he?

ANTHONY 37:33

Mm-hmm.

NALEE 37:34

I could fatten him up real well when you're gone. Maybe give him a walkie to a little walk too.

ANTHONY 37:40

You're gonna walk Duffy?

NALEE 37:41

I'm gonna walk him up.

ANTHONY 37:46

All right. What do you have for this?

NALEE 37:49

Uh I can't laugh at you anymore. Why?

ANTHONY 37:52

I just can't.

NALEE 37:52

It's okay. I'm I'm funny. Funny looking. I'm funny in general.

ANTHONY 37:56

You are funny.

NALEE 37:57

That's you're just gonna get away from that. I am really funny.

ANTHONY 37:59

You are funny.

unknown 38:00

Yeah.

NALEE 38:01

I hear that a lot. Thank you. It's one of my best trades. I think. Bitch. I didn't say anything. Okay, so I only have one. I'm only gonna talk about one in this topic. Okay. Or in this segment. So our our next segment actually is I think we've already talked about it, the secret chaos that nobody talks about. And for me, I'm talking about dating chaos. Like ghosting, dating apps, and relationship confusion.

ANTHONY 38:32

Anyways, well, nothing.

NALEE 38:40

Well, I haven't, you know, like it's whatever.

Dating Apps Ghosting And Trust Issues

NALEE 38:43

But I'm currently in the dating like phase of my life right now. I think I'm not gonna make like a public announcement or anything, but obviously I am currently single. And so then right now, I'm like in the dating phase or whatever. And so then it's been quite interesting, I will say, but I think like the dating scene right now is like trash, y'all. Like it's trash. Like, that's all I could say about it is that it's trash. And uh like chivalry, or however you say it, is really like it's very dead. It's very dead, guys.

ANTHONY 39:20

I disagree with that. Chivalry is not dead. Yeah, it's not dead.

NALEE 39:24

You just haven't maybe I just haven't found the one.

ANTHONY 39:26

You haven't found the right person.

NALEE 39:27

I mean, I'm not planning on I'm not planning on signing the right one yet because it's like, you know, I after a 12-year marriage, and you know, when you're getting back out there, like you shouldn't be jumping into like a relationship. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 39:40

Oh, 100%. I agree with that.

NALEE 39:41

But obviously, I'm still testing the waters and stuff. It's been interesting, it's been very fun.

ANTHONY 39:46

Okay, can we time out though? You said the dating scene is trash.

NALEE 39:50

It is trash.

ANTHONY 39:51

Where where what's the dating scene? What dating scene are you?

NALEE 39:54

What do you mean? There's only one dating scene. Like you're talking to people.

ANTHONY 39:58

How are you meeting these people?

NALEE 40:00

Well, that's okay, that's the thing. So, like, when you obviously, like, when you go out in public, you know, people ask you for your number and stuff, but then like that it just kind of ends there. Like nothing really happens. And then there's the face-to-face interaction, and then there's like dating apps and stuff. And like right now, I think a lot of people rely on dating apps. Like I am, like, I have no I have nothing to hide, but I am on hinge. And so then like I've I've met these people on hinge, and I don't know. Like it's it's hard because you know, you're just talking to them through like for me, I'm just talking to them through the app. And, you know, we have had face-to-face interactions, but at the same time, it's just that's just it. You know what I mean? Like, there's not it's it's very superficial. It's not like it's not in debt anymore. Like nobody really has substance anymore. I feel like.

ANTHONY 40:54

I don't think that it's pee I don't think it that it's that people don't have substance. I think part of the issue with respect to like what you're saying in the dating scene using dating apps, this kind of goes back to our conversation about like social media influencers. When you're on that app and you're on hinge, everything on there is curated and perfect to make this person seem like I guess that's true. A certain way. And that's why I asked you about the dating scene, because I'm like, are you meeting people organically by like going out to the bar and like or going out to Bowl Winkles to go bowling with your friends and like, oh, that guy's cute.

NALEE 41:34

It's been it's been like it's been like half and half.

ANTHONY 41:36

When you meet people in person, I feel like that's a better opportunity for you to actually see who they are, yeah, versus meeting Jeremiah, who's 23 and 5'8, and likes to play for the UW Bluegolds football team. Like, you know what I mean? It's not curated to try and make them seem appealing. I guess that's in the wild, they're like they're in their natural habitat. They're in their natural habitat, they're caught off guard, they can't like pretend about stuff. Yeah. Like come up with a storyline.

NALEE 42:10

Yeah, that's true.

ANTHONY 42:11

But continue, sorry, I just want to.

NALEE 42:13

I mean, I prefer it that way. I prefer to be like in your natural habitat, whatever.

ANTHONY 42:17

Yeah.

NALEE 42:17

But I think, in my opinion, like, there's nobody cute in this town. You know what I mean? So I'm also really picky too, because I know what I bring to the table. I know that, you know, like I know that I'm Fanny. I know she's thick, you know, I don't rely on anybody, I'm independent, you know, and my personality speaks for itself, you know. But but at the same time, I think it's really hard to find like genuine people. And that's just that's just kind of what I'm going through. And I mean, if you're a genuine person and you got money and like you want to take me out on dates, hit me up. She's single, you know.

ANTHONY 42:54

But oh my god. I feel like I gotta doctor fill you right now.

NALEE 42:58

No, no, no, no. But I'm just saying that like that was just a joke. But I'm just saying that like I feel like it's very hard to meet people organically nowadays. It is because people be playing too much fucking games. That you know, like that is that's just it. Like, you don't know what's real or what's fake anymore. And on top of that, it's also my own personal thing where like, yeah, I did go through like a pretty like traumatic, you know, like separation. And that's it traumatized me a little bit. So my trust on like men in general, my trust on people in general is like low. Like I don't trust nobody, you know? And so, like, let's just say, let's pretend if I did find a genuine connection, it's gonna be hard for me to trust that. And obviously, it's my own thing that I need to work on, but it's hard not to project that. And obviously, I can't like compare the person I'm talking to to people in my past because I have to be able to give people the benefit of the doubt that they're not a fucking piece of shit. You know what I mean? Yeah, but at the same time, it's It's really hard to do that. Like, it's really hard to do that because obviously that's why I'm in therapy. That's why, like, I'm doing stuff to kind of improve that part of it. But at the same time, nobody has proven me wrong either. You know what I mean? So it's kind of like, okay, well, people are kind of trash then. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 44:19

I mean, people are trash. I'm not gonna negate that.

NALEE 44:23

I mean, I'm not perfect either. Like, I know like I'm very, I'm very sassy. Like you have to be up to part. Yes, I'm a I'm a freak of nature. I don't know. Like, you gotta match my nasty. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 44:34

Like, can we back this up a little bit though? I want to go back to you had made the comment that, you know, with your separation and everything that happened, like you're a little bit traumatized.

NALEE 44:44

Yeah.

ANTHONY 44:45

Which is completely understandable. But do you think that you should be spending this time to focus on you? Or are you just trying to like because you said the dating scene. So I guess I'm asking, are you using the dating scene for something real or are you using the dating scene to have fun?

NALEE 45:03

So it's neither one. Honestly, it's just to kind of help me build my confidence back and talking and just making honestly, I don't, I'm not like the people that I'm talking to, I tell them that I'm not looking to be committed. I'm looking to just make friends, like conversate, like I'm looking to talk to you. And if that's not what you're looking for, that's okay. Like move on. But if you're willing to look, if you're looking for like companionship or like just somebody to talk to.

ANTHONY 45:29

Bitch, what are you 80? We're looking for, I'm looking for a companion.

NALEE 45:33

I got that from my therapist, okay? He said it's okay to want a companion. So that's, you know, doing my therapy

Standards Boundaries And Dating Intentionally

NALEE 45:40

work. But um, I mean, obviously, you know, people who know me know that I've been actually been dealing with this for quite a while now. And, you know, I've I feel like I've been working on myself. And I think like it's not that I'm ready to be in a committed relationship again, but I think for me, it's healthy for me to socialize with people that I could potentially see myself being with. You know what I mean? Compared to like, it's the thing of if you don't go out there and find somebody, how are you gonna how are you gonna find somebody if you're not even going out? You know what I mean? So for me, obviously, I'm not I'm not looking for like a committed relationship. Obviously, if I find somebody who I'm like, oh damn, like we connect, we align, and you know, I could, I could see potential, then yeah, of course. Like, I'm not gonna jump into it, but I'm gonna slowly let it burn and kind of see where things go. Cause I'm not stupid. Like, I get it, like, you know, there's girls who are, or even guys who jump into relationships just because they can't be alone. Bitch, I could be alone. I could entertain myself. I already got that, like, done. Like I could be by myself. I'm not even worried about that, you know. But it's more of like, again, I know what I bring to the table. I'm looking for somebody to walk with me. I'm looking for somebody who's willing to build with me, you know? And I obviously haven't been in the dating scene for a long time. I think I've I'm not the type of person who's gonna jump into a relationship just to like get distracted or whatever. I already, I've already worked through all that shit, you know. But like as of now, the reason why I'm going into the dating scene is I'm also trying to be intentional as well. I don't want to waste anybody's time. I don't want to waste my time. Obviously, there's gonna be moments where, you know, I'm an adult. I got needs. I gotta do what I gotta do. You know what I mean? And it it is what it is. It is what it is. You know, people got needs, but like as far as like getting to know somebody or actually committing, I'm doing that intentionally on my on my own accord. Like I'm not trying to, I'm not trying to get like locked up with somebody, you know, or locked in with somebody because they felt some kind of connection. No, if I don't feel it, I'm not, I'm not gonna do it. And at this point, coming out from like a 12-year relationship and going back into the dating scene, now I know exactly what I want. I know exactly what to look out for that I don't want. And I know exactly who I do want. You know what I mean? Like as far as characteristics and stuff like that. And I'm telling you guys again, like anybody who is single or whatever, obviously I just started, I'm just now in the dating scene, but I'm just saying that in general, this goes out to anybody and everybody who's in a relationship, who's not in a relationship, who's single, whatever. The main thing that you have to remember is that when you're dating somebody, they have to, they have to meet your standards. Like don't settle.

ANTHONY 48:30

100%.

NALEE 48:31

Don't settle, you know? And I think that's where, you know, a lot of people get stuck in relationships and stuff like that, obviously. But there, you know, there's love. But love and cutting it, that's all I gotta say. Love is not cutting it.

ANTHONY 48:45

I love that man.

NALEE 48:46

There's love, but yeah, it's not cutting it nowadays. Like you have to, it's that effort. Like, whoever shows consistent effort, whoever, you know, like shows you that, like, hey, like, it's that it's that reassurance, you know. But anyways, long story short, the dating scene is interesting. There, that's what I should have said. It's not trash, it's interesting.

ANTHONY 49:09

It is interesting.

NALEE 49:10

I think obviously it's been so if y'all seeing me being a whole bag out there, mind your own fucking business. That's all I gotta say.

ANTHONY 49:16

Take pictures though, and take video and send it to me. No, I th I I agree with you. I think from the stories that I've heard, the people that I've talked to, and things that I've seen, I think the dating scene is very an a very interesting one because I think it's all it's been shifted to be on your phone.

NALEE 49:39

Yeah. And it's honestly it's a saturated thing. I believe that right now the dating scene is very big on hookup culture. Like you hook up and then that's it. You know, you don't hear from them. And it's just like that's kind of sad.

ANTHONY 49:52

Like, but why is that though? Why is it that people feel the need, do you think, to hey, do you want to go to a movie tonight? Oh yeah, sure. And then in the back of their mind, they already know, like they gonna fuck. Yeah.

NALEE 50:09

I mean,

Hookup Culture And Radical Honesty

NALEE 50:10

the thing is do whatever, do whatever floats your boat, to be honest. If you're looking for a dick for pussy, whatever, just be transparent about it. Like if you're like, hey, you know what? Not like I'm not sure now. I just want to fuck. And if the other person is like, yeah, me too. Good for you. Y'all's on the same page.

ANTHONY 50:26

That's a very good point because I feel like we do with society, we're we're trying to break down some of these stigmas, right? So there's the whole thing, mental health. We're talking about it more now. Hookup culture. More and more people are just like hooking up. Like, why why you gotta lie about it? Like, exactly. Don't go on bumble and be like, it is a bumble? No, hinge.

NALEE 50:49

Oh, yeah.

ANTHONY 50:50

Is bumble a one?

NALEE 50:51

Bumble's one too, yeah.

ANTHONY 50:52

Okay. So don't go on hinge, don't go on bumble and be like, I'm trying to find a girl I can bring home to my parents.

NALEE 50:58

Exactly.

ANTHONY 50:58

When you know you're damn well just wanting to hook up. Like say you want your you want to get your dick wet.

NALEE 51:04

Like Exactly.

ANTHONY 51:05

That's I'm gonna have more respect for you if that's the case.

NALEE 51:09

Exactly. Like, don't don't talk to me for a week and say that, oh, like, I'm looking for this and like I'm looking for a long-term relationship, and then all of a sudden, y'all, you know, you meet up and then you like smash and then gone. Like, you should have just been honest. Like, hey, what if I just want to dig too? Like, you know what I mean? Like, if you could just be honest as an adult, like what if I just want to dig too? Like, you didn't need to do all that small talk. We could just be like, hey, see you at nine, done, got a room, good. You know what I mean? Like, that is simpler than lying, making up a whole fucking story. And like, you know, like all that fucking effort for what? For what?

ANTHONY 51:50

Yeah, why? You're just you know wasting time, really. Which is you could already be six inches in golly if you had just fucking told her from the get-go.

NALEE 52:00

Exactly. Exactly. But I gotta say is build that roster, y'all. Build the roster.

ANTHONY 52:06

How many players are you gonna have on your roster?

NALEE 52:08

I can't say because some might catch me and they might listen to this episode, and that's for me to know, and for y'all to never find out.

ANTHONY 52:15

Point blank period.

NALEE 52:18

All I know is I'm a p- I'm a I'm a loyal, committed girl. I don't, I don't, I don't fuck around.

ANTHONY 52:23

Not here, but yeah, I I just throws in that face.

NALEE 52:28

I'm a troll. Anybody who's talked to me knows that I'm a troll, okay? That's it. I'm you're a troll? I'm a troll. I troll around, I fuck around, like not physically, but like, you know.

ANTHONY 52:40

Yeah, you might not you might not want to call yourself a troll, though. That's normally like somebody who's ugly, right?

NALEE 52:46

No, a troll is like they like make fun. Like they troll around. Like they're not an actual troll. Not an actual troll. Like under the bridge troll, not that. Like, like Do kids not say that anymore? No, when they say I'm a troll. She's a troll. He's so old. No, they don't say that anymore. When they say I'm a troll, they mean like I mess around.

ANTHONY 53:12

Like I troll people, like I literally mean I've heard of trolling people, but I've never heard it referred to as being a troll.

NALEE 53:21

Well, I'm a troll.

unknown 53:22

Okay.

NALEE 53:23

I could I could well be a troll under the bridge that to some people, which is fine.

ANTHONY 53:28

No. But if anybody thinks you're a troll under the bridge, they should probably take a look in the mirror.

NALEE 53:33

Well, thank you, Bill. Trying to boost my confidence over here? Yeah. Trying to one eye stand over here? What's the point?

ANTHONY 53:37

I'm trying to. Chivalry ain't dead.

NALEE 53:40

Okay, okay. But yeah, I mean, that's that's pretty much all I gotta say. But the dating scene is interesting, guys. That's yeah. Yeah.

ANTHONY 53:51

I almost feel like you should start some sort of experiment on this journey. I kinda want to.

NALEE 53:57

I kinda want to. I kind of want to like record like my dates and stuff like that. But at the same time, like knowing me, I'm weird. So people might be like, bitch, you're the problem. Not them. You're the problem. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 54:11

Okay. So, okay, so funny story. So I came across this guy who has a podcast. His name is Caleb Heron. Huron? Heron?

NALEE 54:20

He sounds familiar. Okay.

ANTHONY 54:22

And so I was watching an episode of his podcast this weekend, and he had another comedian that I really like on. And the whole conversation was revolving around how awkward he was at not Caleb, but the other guy. His name was Nick. How awkward he was on dates.

NALEE 54:39

Mm-hmm.

ANTHONY 54:40

And so they started like practicing date conversation.

NALEE 54:44

Yeah.

ANTHONY 54:44

And the guy, his name was Nick, he was the problem. Like, and he found that. But maybe that's what you should do is maybe you should simulate a date conversation with a friend or your sister. Like, we'll know.

NALEE 54:59

I'm on the city.

ANTHONY 55:00

And then but then you'll start seeing it.

NALEE 55:02

I guess. Weird. Like, I'm giggly and shit. Like, I was like, okay, like, okay. You know, like, I don't know.

ANTHONY 55:11

But do you know the things that you do that are red flags on a date?

NALEE 55:15

I don't. I'm not a red flag though.

ANTHONY 55:18

You just said that you get giggly and laugh. Like, that's a red flag.

NALEE 55:23

Is it a red flag?

ANTHONY 55:24

No, it it's not a red flag in the sense.

NALEE 55:26

Some people find that cue. Some people. I don't know. Maybe I do. I don't know. But the thing is.

ANTHONY 55:31

So let's roleplay right now.

NALEE 55:33

Okay, I can't authentically be that because you're not a stranger. But we can okay, let's roleplay. Let's do this.

ANTHONY 55:40

Okay, so we're we're at this nice restaurant.

unknown 55:43

Okay, okay.

ANTHONY 55:44

We're at a nice restaurant right now.

NALEE 55:46

Okay.

ANTHONY 55:47

Like, oh, what looks good on the menu?

NALEE 55:50

Okay. I can't do it with you. I would be like, I would be like, oh, what do you want? And then they would ask me, I don't know what do you want. And then I'd be like, I don't know what do you want. Like, I'm not hungry. Like, I can eat it.

ANTHONY 56:03

So then what are we doing here?

NALEE 56:04

I can eat an appetizer. I asked you eat to dinner.

ANTHONY 56:07

I asked you out to dinner, and now you're telling me you're not hungry.

NALEE 56:10

Okay, let's get some drinks. How about that? To start us off with.

ANTHONY 56:13

Okay, so we're we're going out for drinks. We're at the bar right now.

NALEE 56:17

Okay.

ANTHONY 56:17

Oh, what drink sounds good?

NALEE 56:22

I like cocktails. A. But well, I would say this is a horrible date already.

ANTHONY 56:36

If this is how you are on a date.

NALEE 56:40

I am.

ANTHONY 56:41

No, I'm just kidding. But no, maybe you maybe you should try like role-playing with somebody and just like Excuse me. Was that a sneeze?

NALEE 56:48

Oh no. No, it was a cough. Because I was laughing too much and my throat was tickly. But I'm very like not me, like when I'm on a date. Like I'm I'm a little bit softer. I'm not loud like normal. I'm very shy. That's fair. I'm a shy girl. I'm a shy girl. See? But I mean, I felt like it was nice to go on an actual adult date.

ANTHONY 57:10

Like what did you do?

NALEE 57:11

I ain't gonna disclose nothing.

ANTHONY 57:15

I meant did you go to a movie? Did you go out to dinner?

NALEE 57:19

Yeah, I can't disclose something if you're I'm not disclosing anything because if I discussed it, was it the president of the United States or some shit? No, no, no, no. If I disclose something and like people listen to it, they're gonna be like, oh. And that's that's as much as I'm gonna say. But it was really fun. I'll tell you outside of the podcast. But yeah, it was it was really fun. I think it's it's fun. It's fun having an adult.

ANTHONY 57:47

What is an adult date?

NALEE 57:50

I don't know. I'm just confused. Somebody who's not my ex-husband. I don't know. It's it's just different. You know what I mean? Like I think because a lot of like my whole child my whole adulthood, like the beginning of my adulthood, like my 20s up to my 30s.

ANTHONY 58:06

You were married.

NALEE 58:07

I was married. And so then I didn't really get to go out like out as an adult. You know what I mean? Compared to like, yeah, we would go to dinner and stuff. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 58:15

Yeah, now we're coming full circle. I'm understanding now.

NALEE 58:18

Yeah, but now if it's like, oh, I don't know this person, and like I didn't grow up with this person, and you know, kind of like that, where it's just like, oh, it's a complete stranger. I've no history with this person, and like we'll see where things go. But obviously, like I don't know, but I don't know. I I don't know. It's it's been fun getting to know people, you know? Yeah. I I have nothing else to say other than it's been fun and interesting.

ANTHONY 58:47

Yeah, I think that that's the fun part is you get to like learn somebody new and like kind of break down those walls and create a connection.

NALEE 58:59

Yeah. If anything, I think I've learned more about myself than anything.

ANTHONY 59:03

What have you learned? Give me two things you've learned.

NALEE 59:06

That I'm that I'm cute.

ANTHONY 59:07

You didn't know that before? Because you are cute as a button.

NALEE 59:11

Oh no, but no, I think I don't know, that I'm cute.

ANTHONY 59:16

You can't use that one again.

NALEE 59:18

I know, I'm chill, still trying to think. And I giggle too much. Like, I'm too giggly. Like, I need to like chill down on the giggles. But I can't help it. It's just like that's just that's my nervous tick, is that I giggle a lot and I can't.

ANTHONY 59:32

Wine. Wine will help you with that.

NALEE 59:34

I get really drunk with wine, so I probably shouldn't drink wine.

ANTHONY 59:37

Just a glass. I'm not saying down the whole bottle. You love it.

NALEE 59:40

A bottle.

ANTHONY 59:41

A bottle.

NALEE 59:42

I want a bottle. But yes, it's been fun. It's been interesting. But yeah, that's overall like the dating chaos. It's been interesting. It's been fun. Anybody who's single. Honestly, I'll all I gotta say is just enjoy it. Don't take it too seriously. I think honestly, I think that's where people kind of especially in like the dating scene, that's where they kind of like fall off, is that they take it too seriously. Yeah. Like for me, what I was gonna say earlier was anybody, and I've said this plenty of times, actions speak louder than words. Men could promise you, girls could promise you the world, but if they're not putting in consistent effort, if they're not showing up as what they said, and if they're not consistent with what they say they do, it ain't that serious. Like, don't don't lose sleep over it. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 1:00:30

Yeah. And that that oh, go ahead.

NALEE 1:00:32

Oh, I was gonna say, and that's that's one of my main, like my main things right now as being in the dating scene. Like, if you say that you you like consistency, and if you say that like you are a gentleman or whatever, but then let's say if we go on a date and then afterwards you don't do that, yeah, blocked.

ANTHONY 1:00:49

Yeah. Well, yeah. Actions do speak louder than words. The one thing that I do, the one last piece of advice that I want to offer in regards to the dating, dating scene and dating chaos, man or woman, doesn't really matter. This applies to everybody. Don't ever like go on dates, like, and tell me what your thoughts are on this. Okay. You shouldn't go on dates like with the expectation of finding the one.

NALEE 1:01:18

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:01:19

I had a friend who was like they would serial date because they were they didn't want to be alone and they were ready to settle down and they wanted a husband. That's fine, but like don't go on date after date after date and be like, with different people, mind you. Like, yep, not the one. Nope, not the one. Not the one. Oh, like it will happen when it's meant to happen. And sometimes those things need to happen organically.

NALEE 1:01:44

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:01:44

Trying to force that connection and force like lifetime commitment, don't do it.

NALEE 1:01:50

Yeah, for sure. That's uh very good advice. Like, it's it's back to what I'm saying, that it's not that serious. Don't take it so seriously. Yeah. Until they actually show you like consistent. And honestly, like, I'm just speaking from my experience. Like, people who are on these dating apps or in the dating scene, they could have been on in the dating scene for a while and they kind of know tricks. They kind of know all these things, all the right words to say. You know what I mean? And you don't know that. They could give you a backstory because you don't know who they are. That's where you have to take precautions. You gotta be smart. You have to protect yourself, you have to have backup and stuff like that. You know what I mean? Obviously, you know, once you get more experience in the dating scene, you you learn and you pick up things. You know, there's things that I've learned that I was like, yo, I'm fucking stupid. Like I should have saw that coming. You know what I mean? But again, it's the learning process and have fun and don't take it too seriously. Unless that man puts a ring on your finger, open game for anybody. And like I said, keep a roster. Three at a minimum, y'all. Three at a minimum. Don't put all your eggs in one basket. Yeah. That's all I gotta say.

ANTHONY 1:02:56

No, I agree with that.

NALEE 1:02:58

Whoever you're, you know, whoever you're like committing to or you think that you're ready to be in a relationship with them, you never know. They could be a trick. Oh, you know, just be smart about it. Don't take it too seriously. And again, it's just it's not that serious. Like, if they, if they do get it, you know, if it does happen, you'll you'll you'll you'll feel it. Again, let it happen organically. Don't force it. Don't don't go crazy. Again, if you crash out, crash out to your fans. Don't crash out to the person you're talking to. Because do crash out.

ANTHONY 1:03:29

Do crash out. Yeah. Don't hold back on that.

NALEE 1:03:31

Yeah, you have to crash out. Like, if you don't, like you're gonna have you're gonna crash out regardless. You know what I mean? But as far as, you know, the dating scene and stuff like that, just have fun. That's all I gotta say. Just have fun, be safe, and be smart. Don't be smart. Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:03:48

Especially in today's world.

NALEE 1:03:49

Yep. What was your topic? Damn, we tangent off a lot on that one.

ANTHONY 1:03:53

We did tangent a lot on that one.

NALEE 1:03:54

That's because I I I know it's uh yeah.

ANTHONY 1:03:57

It's what?

NALEE 1:03:58

Well, I was just gonna say it was like, I don't know, my first time talking about it.

ANTHONY 1:04:02

Oh, okay. What I wanted to talk about was daily life chaos, just adulting in general, like work, laundry, cooking, errands. Like, I wish I could go back to being a kid. I always like to think that I could like do it all. But there's just not enough time in a day. I don't understand. Like looking back, I'm like, how the fuck did my grandma do it? Like, do you ever do that? Like, yeah, how did how did my mom do this? Like, you would watch, like, I would watch my grandma as a kid, and it was like she got everything done

Work Laundry Errands And No Time

ANTHONY 1:04:34

and she did everything, and now I'm like, how did she do it? I'm like, I work, and then I gotta like go get the dog's medicine, go the dog medicine.

NALEE 1:04:43

That really triggered you, huh?

ANTHONY 1:04:47

That's a story for another time. But no, I'm just saying, like, there's just so much, and there's just not enough time in a day, I feel, to like, how do people keep up with their lives?

NALEE 1:04:58

I don't know. I ain't doing it. I literally have like four piles of clothes on my couch right now because I'm packing and I feel like it's been sitting there for the past week, but I'm just like, uh, I'll get to it when I get to it.

ANTHONY 1:05:12

I move that we reduce work days to six hour workdays and four-day work weeks. So we only have to work 24 hours a week.

NALEE 1:05:22

I second that.

ANTHONY 1:05:23

That would give us 20 an additional 26 hours a week.

NALEE 1:05:26

Yeah, I second that for sure. I don't know. It's it's hard being in a girl.

ANTHONY 1:05:30

15 hours.

NALEE 1:05:31

Like it's really hard. Sometimes I'm just like, how did I get here? Why am I so grown up right now? Like, why can't I be a child? You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 1:05:41

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, I want to go back.

NALEE 1:05:43

Yeah, it's it's hard, but I think the beauty in that is is finding people who is willing to go with you through the ups and downs of being an adult. And that's where finding great friends, a K A U and you know, a lot of the other people in my life. You makes it easier, you know, for you. So Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:06:05

Well, you can make it a whole lot easier by coming over and doing my laundry for me.

NALEE 1:06:08

I don't want to touch your dirty hanky pankies.

ANTHONY 1:06:14

Rude.

NALEE 1:06:15

Rude. You didn't even say they're not dirty. You agreed to it.

ANTHONY 1:06:19

Everybody got dirty laundry.

NALEE 1:06:21

Not mine. Mine dirty.

ANTHONY 1:06:23

Really? So if you took your underwear off right now, they'd be clean?

NALEE 1:06:26

Yeah, I could smell it and it'd be fine. Have you never done that? No. Oh. Well, I'm a woman. You know, like Okay, you know what? This is a side tangent. This is a PSA. No. I'm gonna talk about it. It's okay. But if you're a woman, you know, you got women parts. And if you I hope so. If you can't take your underwear and smell it throughout the day, and if it doesn't smell, that's fine. But if it smells, you gotta go to the doctor, baby girl. Like you need to like, you know, check up on your kitty. I told you it's a woman PSA. And if y'all don't smell it or whatever, that's disgusting.

ANTHONY 1:07:12

Women do not do that.

NALEE 1:07:13

No, no, no, no, no. I'm not saying

A Very Unexpected pH PSA

NALEE 1:07:15

every day. I'm just saying that like once in a long time to check to make sure your pH balance and everything is fine. Like, I'm saying for you to smell it, but I'm saying that I can use my like I could take off my underwear and smell it and it'd be fine, is what I'm saying. So I'm just I'm just countering your stinky undie like point is that I don't got a stinky undie. That took that take a time.

ANTHONY 1:07:44

That's I could say I don't I'm literally I'm I don't even know what to say. You randomly smell your underwear?

NALEE 1:07:57

You should. As a woman, you should. Not like all the time, but like I'd say, like, I don't know, once a month. I don't know. Just to make sure your pH balance is like normal. Like it shouldn't smell. My that's my point of view, is that it shouldn't smell. But if you start smelling a smell, that's when you need to like take care of your kitty. You know what I mean?

ANTHONY 1:08:17

I agree with that, but I'm just saying, like, if you take your underwear off, like you don't just randomly do it.

NALEE 1:08:23

You don't just like, oh, I'm gonna smell my underwear today.

ANTHONY 1:08:26

Like, if it don't smell then, no, I get that. But I'm saying, like, if your pH is off, do you it like do you really need to bring it up to your nose just like you're not gonna get anything wafting when you take your underwear off?

NALEE 1:08:37

But yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's that like if it smells, you don't need to smell it. But sometimes it's how did we get here?

unknown 1:08:47

I don't know.

NALEE 1:08:48

You're stanky hanky panky. And you said that your undie don't smell. So I'm I was trying to prove a point that no, my undies don't. I spiraled into pH balance. That's right. That's right.

ANTHONY 1:09:08

Are you fucking drunk?

NALEE 1:09:11

I did have I did have like four shots of soju before we recorded, but I've already sobered down. I don't know what the fuck this is. I told you it didn't clock it up here. It didn't clock it. Anyways, let's move on to this balanced conversation. What did you have on your topic?

ANTHONY 1:09:26

That's all that was my topic. We just discussed my topic. Yeah.

NALEE 1:09:30

Okay.

ANTHONY 1:09:31

Do you want to bring us home to segment three?

NALEE 1:09:33

Yeah, well, segment three here is about redefining what together even means.

ANTHONY 1:09:39

So here's the twist. Maybe having it together is non-existent, totally fake.

NALEE 1:09:47

Kind of like low rise jeans. Like, why the fuck? I mean, I get it. It's good, it's cute for like the skinny gals, but not so much for the thick girls. I mean, it it's probably good for the thick girls too, just not me.

ANTHONY 1:09:58

But digging. Just I'm done.

NALEE 1:10:01

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:10:02

Are you smelling your panties right now? Just kidding.

NALEE 1:10:04

Ew,

Redefining What Together Even Means

NALEE 1:10:05

no.

ANTHONY 1:10:05

No, it's just a societal construct that we all just bought into.

NALEE 1:10:09

And maybe the real goal isn't perfection.

ANTHONY 1:10:11

Maybe it's surviving, laughing, and occasionally eating cereal for dinner without guilt.

NALEE 1:10:17

That's the best.

ANTHONY 1:10:18

Sounds so good.

NALEE 1:10:19

It does. All right. What are your topics? Let's go over yours first.

ANTHONY 1:10:22

Well, the one that I wanted to talk about was, and we kind of just touched base on it, was like relationships and support systems. And I just think that as an adult, that's the one thing that you definitely need to make sure that you have a strong foundation and support system around you, whether that be family, chosen friends, whatever. Just somebody that you can essentially play, you know, we listen and we don't judge.

NALEE 1:10:50

Yeah. Well, I listen and I judge.

ANTHONY 1:10:52

I know you judge, but I I appreciate your judgment.

NALEE 1:10:56

Thank you. It's a little chaotic sometimes, but ditto, I feel the same. I agree. I think, again, I heard this thing the other day. You guys probably heard it too. But family, you know, you don't get to choose your family, but friends and your loved ones, they're really the only people you get to choose to be in your life. So choose wisely.

ANTHONY 1:11:14

Yeah.

NALEE 1:11:15

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:11:16

Really? Choose wisely and like choose people who show up for you. Choose people who choose you.

NALEE 1:11:20

Like, yeah. I did just want to say that, you know, I I've I've been very thankful and blessed to have you as one of my best friends. I'm gonna try not to cry. But, you know, like with the move and everything, I think I've been trying to avoid a lot of people just because I don't want to like like, you know, I don't want to like be emotional about it, but I'm trying not to. But you've been a really big part

Support Systems And A Moving Goodbye

NALEE 1:11:54

of my community here in Eau Claire. And I just I'm very thankful for you and I'm gonna miss you. I'm gonna miss not being able to like drive to your house and stuff like in an instant. So um I wasn't supposed to cry.

ANTHONY 1:12:11

You weren't supposed to cry.

NALEE 1:12:13

But you know, like I think this is a a pure example of like you choose your own community community. And uh I got really lucky that I have you as part of my community.

ANTHONY 1:12:25

That feeling is very mutual. I am very sad that we're gonna be leaving. But you're you're gonna be not far away, right?

NALEE 1:12:35

Two hours, baby. Two hours. Two hours. Damn, what the fuck did this episode turn into? Like my coming out story?

ANTHONY 1:12:42

You're pregnant, you're so emotional.

NALEE 1:12:44

Itch now, please, Jesus, please. But uh, yeah, I mean, you know, whatever. You know, I'm I'm very thankful for I'm really thankful for you. I think, you know, obviously I didn't, I don't, I didn't I haven't really talked about like what happened. I'm probably not going to because, you know, that's not part of like the podcast or whatever. But, you know, you've been a really big support system for me, especially through like all of my really hard times. And thank you for not judging me. Thank you for, you know, giving me like honest, not reviews, but like honestly.

ANTHONY 1:13:17

Critical feedback.

NALEE 1:13:18

Yes, critical feedback, advice. Although I didn't really listen to any of them. I still could I still appreciate or majority of them I did, but like some of them, obviously, I'm delusional sometimes. We know that. But, you know, I just want to say, you know, as an official, like thank you for being such a big pillar in one of, you know, in my life in here in Eau Claire. I think meeting you has been probably pretty life-changing for me because you know, it's you've taught me so much. I've learned so much from you. And honestly, like I will say, I think you've taught me that there are also like genuine person like me out there. Like it's just not me. Like, I have you to be like living proof of that, hey, like there's genuine people who actually care for other people, just not themselves. And I think you and I, like, our growth has been so like like parallel. Like we've both grown together, like career-wise, mentally, physically. And, you know, I think we've just really been on the same wavelength. And, you know, I wouldn't have done it with anybody else other than you. And, you know, I'm again, I'm very thankful. Of course, I'm just moving away. It's not that far. But it's just again, it's just that thought of that, like, I can't just drive five, 10 minutes and see you and like talk to you face to face. And, you know, I really appreciate all that you've given me. Um, whether it's, you know, words of advice, you know, critical criticism and just being a friend, honestly. Like, I think you've been probably one of my biggest impacts here in Eau Claire. And yes, I've been saying that like people is avoiding me, but it's actually me projecting. I've been avoiding everybody. Just because, you know, like 12, 10 years of my life is in like a short amount of time, you know, like it's it's a big chunk of my my life. And you've consistently like shown up for me, and that means a lot to me. So it's the it's the actions over words for me, you know. So what the fuck? Why am I crying?

ANTHONY 1:15:38

God, yeah. I'm not gonna cry, but don't cry.

NALEE 1:15:42

No, no, you don't cry, remember? You don't cry.

ANTHONY 1:15:44

Yeah, I don't cry. No, I appreciate that the feeling is very mutual. I'm so sad that you're gonna be leaving, but obviously that's coming from a place of selfishness, because if I just had my way, you would just stay right here.

NALEE 1:15:58

I just live with you. Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:16:00

Yeah. You just come over. You can live here. But no, I'm I'm excited for you. I'm happy for you, and I think that this is gonna be a new opportunity for you to grow. Just don't forget about me. Don't forget about Eau Claire, don't forget about the podcast.

NALEE 1:16:17

I can never forget about you. This is for life, remember?

ANTHONY 1:16:21

This is for life. We're try we're trauma bonded for life.

NALEE 1:16:24

Yes, for sure.

ANTHONY 1:16:25

I think you definitely hit the nail right on the head because we've gone through so much together, and it's just we've really our lives have really truly periled each other.

NALEE 1:16:36

Yeah.

ANTHONY 1:16:36

As far as our experiences and situations have gone. And I think that we've the last th two, three years, we really have like connected more on like a deeper level in our friendship. And so, yeah, I think it's definitely for life. I'm not I'm not worried about losing you.

NALEE 1:16:57

Yeah, far from that.

ANTHONY 1:16:59

And if that were to ever happen, I'd just get your address and I'd show up on your door out doorstep and fix it.

NALEE 1:17:06

Yeah, of course. Yeah, I don't think I could I don't think I could ever like see my life without you too. So well, that will I won't cry. This shit took a fucking turn.

ANTHONY 1:17:17

Yeah, I wasn't expecting that. I wasn't expecting like an emotional.

NALEE 1:17:20

I wasn't either. I was like, okay, this you got this, but take me to church. I can't. Okay, what was your other topic?

ANTHONY 1:17:27

No, just that one.

NALEE 1:17:28

Okay.

ANTHONY 1:17:29

So you the floor is now yours.

NALEE 1:17:32

Okay. I also just have one more topic. It is celebrating chaos, like finding joy in the unpredictability of adulting. And this is so fucking on brand. Yes. You know, like again, cash out if you need to. You know, I think, like I've been saying to a lot of people, use me as an example. You know, life is nothing like what you expect it to be. There's lots of ups and downs and ins and outs and failures and beginnings

Celebrating Chaos Tattoos And Piercings

NALEE 1:18:03

and endings, you know? And so you just have to kind of take it by, you know, take it through strides and just kind of go with the flow and just remember that, you know, uh, you know, share it with the people who actually care about you and, you know, they'll they'll walk with you too. You know, you don't have to do everything alone. And you know what? Life is really a journey. Like whether, you know, whether you're doing it by yourself or you're doing it with a group of people or whatever, just kind of embrace that, you know, like it's kind of what makes you who you are. And honestly, as sad as it sounds, it's kind of amazing.

ANTHONY 1:18:37

Yeah. I I agree with you. I think it's just you need to take life one day at a time. And it's funny that you chose this as something that you wanted to talk about because I was just thinking about this yesterday morning, and I was like, I really need to just start releasing myself and just being like it is what it is. I just have to water off a duck's back. Have you ever heard that saying?

NALEE 1:19:10

Yeah, you tell me that.

ANTHONY 1:19:11

Did I Okay, see, I can't even remember.

NALEE 1:19:13

Oh, I think it was our weed episode. You t you told me that. I'm like, I've never heard of that before. So it tracks why you don't remember.

ANTHONY 1:19:20

Yeah, that would track because it yeah, that was no, I think finding joy in the little things and the unpredictability of life. Yeah.

NALEE 1:19:31

It's hard. I will I will say that sometimes like it's like when when you're down, like people just keep fucking kicking you, but at the same time, it's just like it's what makes you who you are. It's what makes you resilient. And honestly, like when you think about it the in the big picture, like we're just again, we're just little tiny turtles in a big, big world.

ANTHONY 1:19:51

So we have to get our tattoos.

NALEE 1:19:53

We do turtle tattoos. Yeah. That's we definitely do. Let's do it. We got Polly.

ANTHONY 1:20:00

So You were supposed to you're supposed to tell me, remember? We're supposed to get something on the books.

NALEE 1:20:05

I know, we were, but it's been kind of crazy, you know? But we'll have to for sure.

ANTHONY 1:20:10

Yeah.

NALEE 1:20:10

What if we get it in Vegas if we go to Vegas? Yeah. Um did I tell you that I'm gonna get my tongue pierced? No. How dare you do that ew face, bitch?

ANTHONY 1:20:19

Sorry. Yeah, I'm gonna be.

NALEE 1:20:20

I'm happy for you. Yeah, I want to get my tongue pierced.

ANTHONY 1:20:24

You should get your tongue split.

NALEE 1:20:25

Ew. That's nasty. But it could do this.

ANTHONY 1:20:28

Yeah? Yeah.

NALEE 1:20:31

Nah. I just want to pierce it. I've always wanted to pierce it. And I kind of want to pierce my lips.

ANTHONY 1:20:35

Oh.

NALEE 1:20:36

But I don't know.

ANTHONY 1:20:37

You're gonna get your nose pierced, your septum?

NALEE 1:20:39

No, probably not. I'm gonna get some other stuff pierced though, but not right now.

ANTHONY 1:20:44

What? What other stuff?

NALEE 1:20:45

I want to get my nipples pierced and I wanna pierce my kitty.

ANTHONY 1:20:49

That escalated fast. You want to pierce your kitty?

NALEE 1:20:52

I do. I think that's hot. Is that not hot? I don't know.

ANTHONY 1:20:55

I don't know.

NALEE 1:20:55

I think it's hot. I think it looks hot. When that OnlyFans money come in, baby, you know what's up. You know what I'm saying?

ANTHONY 1:21:03

What and you want- Did you say you want to get no and you wanted to get snake bites?

NALEE 1:21:07

I do. I've been wanting snake bites for a very long time. I could see myself with it though. I think I would look cute with it.

ANTHONY 1:21:14

I feel like you would look cuter with a Marilyn Monroe. My hair? Yeah.

NALEE 1:21:17

No, because it's too close to my scar.

ANTHONY 1:21:19

Can't you get it out of the side?

NALEE 1:21:20

And if I do it over if I do it over here, it just looks stupid. Because now I got two things. You know what I mean? I got my scar here and I got piercing hair. So I got two things on both sides. But I don't think I'm gonna do that. I think I'm probably just gonna pierce my tongue. And maybe the girlies. Yeah. But we'll see.

ANTHONY 1:21:37

We'll see.

NALEE 1:21:37

Now everybody knows everything.

ANTHONY 1:21:39

So it's all out there. This has been like a very like tumultuous episode with like It has. I feel like we came in here with like our outline and like we had things that we wanted to discuss and we touched on them, but then the majority of this episode is just spiking. Tangents. Yeah. Tangents.

NALEE 1:21:56

This is this is top tier twin tangents episode right here.

ANTHONY 1:22:01

This is poor memory. Chaotic edition, yeah.

NALEE 1:22:04

Yes, for sure. All right. So if today's episode taught us anything, what's up? Did I what?

ANTHONY 1:22:10

Well, I was gonna ask if you had anything else that you wanted to say. Nothing much as far as adulting.

NALEE 1:22:17

No, just be chill about it, y'all. Don't take it too seriously.

ANTHONY 1:22:21

Don't take life too serious. Chill. Learn from your failures. Self-care is important. Relationships and support systems are important, and that's the bottom line. That's the key to surviving adulthood.

NALEE 1:22:36

Yeah.

Final Takeaways And Closing

NALEE 1:22:37

Period. Point blank period.

ANTHONY 1:22:39

Point blank period. All right. You want to close us out?

NALEE 1:22:44

Sure. Well, if today's episode taught us anything.

ANTHONY 1:22:48

Nobody really has it all together.

NALEE 1:22:50

Hell to the fuck no. Not your coworkers.

ANTHONY 1:22:52

No ma'am.

NALEE 1:22:53

Instagram perfect couple. No. Not even Anthony and I. Our lives are crazy.

ANTHONY 1:22:59

Our lives are chaos.

NALEE 1:23:01

Yes.

ANTHONY 1:23:02

We're just out here winging it and occasionally remembering to drink water.

NALEE 1:23:07

So, Ho, if you're in your 30s or your 40s, or whatever age you are, and you're wondering why life feels like improv.

ANTHONY 1:23:15

Congratulations. You're doing adulting the right way.

NALEE 1:23:19

Thanks for surviving this chaotic tangent with us. This has been a fucking whirlwind of a fucking episode.

ANTHONY 1:23:24

Of tangents. Yeah. And as always, we're still here unhinged, still here, chaotic, and still twin tangents.

NALEE 1:23:33

Period.

ANTHONY 1:23:34

Point blank.

NALEE 1:23:35

Like, period.

unknown 1:23:38

Bye.