Say Yes to Less: How to Crush People-Pleasing, Set Better Boundaries & Stop Burning Out with Dr. Emily Jacobs

Friend, when is the last time you said no without guilt?

When is the last time someone texted you and you didn't immediately drop everything to respond?

When is the last time you said yes to something and actually meant it because it aligned with your soul instead of your people-pleasing?

This episode is for every ambitious woman who has been saying yes to everything and wondering why she is running on empty.

Dr. Emily Jacobs is a doctorate-prepared board-certified nurse coach, TEDx speaker, national bestselling author, Goldman Sachs 10,000 Small Businesses alumni, and founder of Empowered Moms. She built an entire movement out of a personal pain point, watching her mom quietly give up on her own life, and she is here today to make sure you don't do the same.

Say yes to less. Less people-pleasing. Less burnout. Less waiting for approval. More of YOU. 

In This Episode You'll Learn:

• What Say Yes to Less actually means and why it is not about having less ambition
• The three-step framework for better boundaries, pause, consider your choices, act in alignment
• Why your quick response addiction might be burning you out faster than anything else
• The one question to ask instead of saying yes or no on the spot and why it changes everything
• Why Dr. Emily started Empowered Moms with four people in her living room and what happened next
• How to train your kids, starting at age two, to figure things out without you
• Why the people on the inside of your home get whatever is left after you say yes to everyone outside
• The blood pressure analogy that will completely reframe how you think about rest and recovery
• Why self-doubt and fear are the real things keeping ambitious women stuck
• What it looks like to reclaim your identity as a high-achieving mom without burning it all down

About Dr. Emily Jacobs:

Dr. Emily Jacobs is a doctorate-prepared board-certified nurse coach, TEDx speaker, national bestselling author, and founder of Empowered Moms. After 20+ years in healthcare she resigned from what no longer aligned with her purpose and built her own practice helping women across the country design purpose-driven lives. She is the author of Live Your Life for You, Not Your Mom and the upcoming Empowered Moms collaborative book releasing July 2026.

📲 Follow Dr. Emily: @dremilyjacobs
🌐 Website: Empowered Moms Home
📚 Live Your Life for You, Not Your Mom, available now
📚 Empowered Moms Collaborative Book, releasing July 2026
🎉 Empowered Moms Conference, October 2026, Detroit Michigan

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

It's important that you start training people that you're not going to be so quick to respond.

SPEAKER_02 0:03

Oh, she just dropped a bomb. She started with the bomb and she's dropping a bomb on the end, friends. Let's go.

SPEAKER_01 0:11

Yeah. I mean, you really, you don't, you don't have to be everybody's yes, and especially if you're complaining about it. Sorry, I had to go there because that's the reality. Everybody needs me. We all want to be needed. It's awesome. It feels so good, especially like the people pleasers. Like, oh, that's how my mom was. Everybody needs me. But yeah, but then you're exhausted and then you're you're taking it out on the inside of the house. And so it's really that. It's it's learning how to train people that you're not going to be so quick to respond. So even if that means, let's say someone texts texts you and you do have the ability to help them, it's still not emergent though. See how long you can go without responding. It's like an experiment. I guarantee you're probably going to start with anxiety because you're like, well, but I can, but I can right now. No, no, no. Stand up, put your phone in the other room, go walk, just walk around the house and see what that does. And that's telling you that there's like almost an addiction to respond quickly. So then almost, you know, time yourself. So just learn how to not be so quick to respond. I guarantee it will start helping you not burn yourself out as much. And remember that if you're afraid of forgetting, you already know I gave you that tool.

SPEAKER_03 1:11

Welcome to For His Glory CEO, the podcast for high-achieving women like you who have built the business, hit the milestone, checked all the boxes, yet deep down something still feels off. The success is there, but you know God has so much more. I'm your host, Allie. If you're hungry for results rooted in the word, this is for you. Let's get this party started. Welcome back, everyone. I am so excited to have Dr. Emily Jacobs with us. Woo! The crowd goes wild. Friends, I knew when I was gonna start hosting some people on my podcast. I had to have Dr. Emily. You guys, I call her big stage Emily. We'll get into it later. But this girl is a doctorate in nursing. Yes, that is like the hardest doctorate to get. I know because I I tried. She is a 10x speaker. She is a national best-selling author. We'll get into that as well. But even more so, she is all about empowering moms, crushing people pleasing like a bug, and really helping women live life to the fullest and enjoy it. What what a concept. So, Dr. Emily, welcome to Forrest Glory CEO. I'm so honored to have you, my love.

SPEAKER_01 2:28

Oh my gosh. I'm so excited to be here. I've I've been counting down the days for this podcast. I'm happy to be here.

SPEAKER_03 2:35

Oh, well, you have so many accomplishments. And so I'm just gonna jump right into it, girlfriend. I mean, you're a Goldman Sachs, 10,000 small businesses alumni, a TEDx speaker, which just totally blew up two, not one, but two TEDx talks, a doctor-prepared board certified coach. You've built a real business out of like a personal pain point. I'd love for you to take us back to like how you became the woman you are now.

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Oh, you know it's gonna go deep. Wait, let me always start with the seven-year-old version. The seven-year-old version hears you, Allie, when you say big stage Emily, because she remembers like that was me. I've also been very empathetic and I've also been a literally since I can remember, a person who believes in choice, and meaning we all have a choice. And so if something's not working, where are you, the individual, going to choose differently? So there's so much depth to this, but essentially I saw things in my own mom that I'm like, huh, I wonder why she's choosing that. You know, let's say that someone's just venting or complaining, and that's fine if it ends, but if it keeps going on and on and on, my brain would go to, well, why aren't you just changing that? So there's so much to this story. I don't know where you even want to begin with that piece, but I think just throughout my whole career, even in nursing, what I loved the most was connecting with the patient. And how can I make, how can I hit their goals and achieve mine at the same time? So there's a lot of negotiations with it. But I cared about the person so much that they're I've been always known as a storyteller and a story hearer. Like people want to share their life story with me. It's very, I don't know if this is like an odd superpower that God placed on me, but it happens everywhere I go. People want to tell me their deepest, just everything and possible. And then what I've learned is that I feel like this gift that I have is to hold space for people and allow that. And that's essentially when I started my company. It's allowing women's women to feel seen and heard through all the different services that we offer or programs that we have. So that's like a just a general nutshell of kind of how I am, where how I am what I am.

SPEAKER_03 4:39

Friends, okay, stop for a moment. I hope you leaned in and you listened to that. She saw at a young age a choice. She saw a choice and she saw her mom not making the right choices and wondering, just just being curious, right? Always be curious. I wonder why she isn't changing her circumstances. I'm wondering why. We're not trees. We can make a change, we can reinvent ourselves every single day, right? We don't have to stay stuck. But I love, okay, this last TED X talk, I don't know, you're like blowing up right now. You're on all the things, writing all the books. I think it was the last one. It was say yes to less. Yeah. And it's like it's like going viral because people are obsessed with the message. I would love for you to tell everyone what is the whole core message behind saying yes to less.

SPEAKER_01 5:21

Yeah. Oh, I get chills just thinking about it because this particular talk changed me. And I knew it. I knew it when I applied. I knew it that if I got it, this was gonna a little bit hurt. You know, what I really what I really saw was that if I keep living my life in a burned out state, giving to everybody and everything, a little bit like my mom did, because she felt like that's just what you should do. You give up your life for your kids, that's what you do. And essentially I saw my mom give up on her health and give up on her life. My mom passed away in 2020, about two weeks after my second daughter was born. And when I was holding that second daughter, I just I just realized I'm like, I've got to break this cycle. It's not just about how much we can achieve. Obviously, you see all these things I've done. The reality is that I have still gotten burned out. And now I'm so passionate about helping the ambitious soul, like us, these ambitious souls, is to when we do it, not if we do it, when we get there again, we get to burnout again. It's are we, do we have enough tools in place to help us get through that? Because I don't want to quietly, you know, shut down ambition. That's that's not say yes to less is not like don't do anything. No, it's what really say yes to less means is, and it's for the ambitious soul and the people pleaser. It's to help, it's help you to not have less ambition, but less people pleasing. It's to help you have better boundaries and less overthinking and fear of disappointment. It's less of that. It's less of worrying about other people and more pouring into your gifts, your family, your loved ones, your values. Say you say yes to that, but say less to everything that does not align with your soul.

SPEAKER_03 6:52

So good. So good. Man, the people pleasing and the imposter syndrome. I mean, these are things that I constantly hear day after day with clients and just women in in general. But you you hit on something, the tools in your tool belt, and you have done the work on boundaries. Like when I first met you, first of all, when I first met her, and she's like, you gave us like this little empowered moms, and I was like, oh my gosh, I'm empowered moms. Like, I want to be an empowered mom. What does that look like? You're like, you are an empowered mom. Like we empower other moms. I'm like, this is amazing. I want to be a part of this, and you built a huge community out of it, and you've really, really honed in on the whole boundaries thing, teaching mommies, those boundaries and stuff. I'd love for you to give us some like of your ninja skills when you talk about toolkit and how you do that about boundaries and around boundaries. Friends, I wanna share something that I've actually never shared before, but it's been so transformational for multiple six and seven-figure business women that I would be remiss not to share it with you. So I want you to picture this. You're in a room with 10 other women who are running payroll, running teams, making heavy, high-stake decisions, and managing everything. And imagine you bringing your question or your bottleneck to that group of women. Do you think that you can handle things which used to maybe take you months, maybe years in the next 10 minutes? What I found is a lot of us playing at this field, we don't struggle with lack of strategy, motivation, even discipline. We struggle with not having a sounding board in real time with ideal clients and women who truly get the level we're playing at. And that's why I created the inner circle for multiple six and seven figure women to play in. It is the community of communities that offers transformations like I've never seen report. And you know what the number one receipt is? We had a hundred percent retention of those clients from 2025. Rejoin us for 2026. It's a private, exclusive group and extremely selective as well. But if this sounds like this is exactly what you need, grab the Inner Circle application in the show notes, and we'll let you know if you're a great fit. All right, back to the show.

SPEAKER_01 9:00

Yeah, one of the biggest things, and I brought it into this last talk, and it's throughout, um, I'll do the shout-out, throughout the book, Live Your Life for You, Not Your Mom. I love how you have your copy.

SPEAKER_03 9:10

I love this book, you guys. I love it. You're even, we're like twinning with the book today. You guys get this. I I I gotta interject though. You guys, she was she had a two-week-old baby when her mom passed, like, and then birthed this thing out of pain. Like, you you gotta read stuff when people have gone through hard stuff like that. You know, this is like pure gold. So, girl, but yes.

SPEAKER_01 9:30

Yeah, so a lot of this was getting through, you know. Imagine being this little girl and you just want your mom to be happy. Imagine that. And so you're gonna do whatever it takes because because I had seen her vibrant, full of life, joyful, playful, and I watched it front row C deteriorate and and move into like resentment and bitterness, and I didn't get a chance to do this, or I'm too all the excuses you could think of, and I'm like, I don't understand what happened. And so I kept trying to do more, do better, make her happy, wear the outfit, do the smile with her friends, and it's exhausting, as you can imagine. So I lived in burnout like my whole life because I really cared and I thought, if I can make my mom happy, I could do anything. Well, yeah, you see how that could like psychologically, you know, she didn't ask me to do that.

unknown 10:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:15

A lot of the boundaries I came from being self-taught, learning what not to do, and I wrote them throughout the whole book. So one of the things, the things I love, it's like a little three-step framework, but essentially it's pause, consider your choices, and act in alignment. So we get these signals, right? We get them from God and it and we get them from anywhere. And it's like, I'm not, I don't think I'm supposed to say yes right away. Then don't do anything. And I think some women are like, oh gosh, wow, here comes you know, Dr. Emily on the podcast. She's saying, just don't don't answer, don't do anything. Like it's so easy. It's not to the yes people, the givers, the people pleasers, we want to respond to the text message as we're in the middle of a podcast. Hold on one second, I gotta like mess up my hood right. This is not an emergency. And so, especially when you talk about nursing, I used to be an ICU nurse and an educator. That was an emergency.

SPEAKER_03 11:02

That's an emergency.

SPEAKER_01 11:03

Those are emergencies. Cardiac ICU is someone's heart rate's dropping. Yeah, you, yeah, you do are gonna stop what you're doing. But then I brought it into my own life and I treated everything. I treated every little cry from my daughter as an emergency, and I just was depleting everything over people pleasing everybody. And I think that's where burnout really comes in is that you're afraid of what people think, you're afraid to disappoint them, you're afraid to say no. So what if before that next yes, you don't say it? You, you, you do nothing. Like if someone texts you right now, Allie, when you get a chance, especially when they say stuff like that, yeah. When you get a chance. Don't do anything. And so what my people pleasers will say, but Emily, but like what if I forget? Let me let's go through that scenario really quick. What if you forgot? What will happen? Two things will happen. They will either move on and find a yes in someone else, yeah, or guess what? They will write you back.

SPEAKER_03 11:53

So true. I know. So true.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

And so, but what's so hard is that we we feel bad. So I want I want to help you to not feel so bad. Come on, and to train you to not be everybody's yes and not be so quick to respond because you're training your brain. That's what's burning you out. Your brain can't decide that you're important and the work you're doing right now in this moment intentionally is important.

SPEAKER_03 12:15

Yes. Oh, so good. So incredibly good. Man, the best yes by Lisa Turnquist, that like changed my life. Changed my life because same, same. I came out of a pediatric ICU nursing. Yeah, kids, they spiral and they die very quickly. And if you're not on top of it, so then yeah, everything was emergency. Consistently having to be like always on the phone, always responding to my first business. And then one day I decided, you know what? I'm not Johnny on the spot. I'm Allie. I have four humans, a smoking hot husband, and you can go find this yourself, right? I am training you guys to not be diligent in looking for things, right? And I always, I'll always share this. One of our pastors, Pastor Geneva, she's amazing. She goes, Allie, 24-hour rule. Their hair is gonna be on fire. And by the time 24 hours pass, they won't even know why their hair is on fire. Girl, tested, tried, and approved. Like it is the truth. People are like, oh, I don't know. I'm like, wait, you are literally in a crisis 24 hours ago and you don't know why you need me so bad. Like, what? But I mean, it's so true. But I love, okay, so the pause and then the choice.

SPEAKER_02 13:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:19

Girl, that's such a radical message, Dr. M, because I don't think people talk about the choice so much.

SPEAKER_01 13:23

They Yeah, there's a there's a so before you say yes to something, and that's where they consider your choice. What are you about to say no to? That's in the pause. If you can quickly do that, now let's say it's in person, right? A little harder because you just want to like make someone's day. I love being a people pleaser, by the way. Being a people pleaser is not a bad thing. That's what I don't want people to think. You have to learn, though, your limits and you have to learn how to communicate them so you don't burn yourself out. I love saying yes. That's why I literally had to make the title of this talk say yes to less, which mind you, this just you know came out not too long ago. My husband has to remind me. He's like, What about say yes to less? I'm like, right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thanks for the reminder. I love it. But here's the thing, too. Like, if it's in person, here's a great response. Don't say yes or no, because no is tricky for yes people. Say something like, When do you need that answer by? Love that. See what we're doing? We're pausing and we're buying you time because the reality is you think they need it now. Yep. There are most of the time they don't, and they'll might they might say, Oh, in a couple days. And then what I tell everyone, do not put that on your to-do list. Zip zero, get it out of your brain. Say to that person, hey, Allie, okay, great. In a few days, Allie, you're gonna message me what you need, and I'll see if I can help you then. Now it's completely off my mental load.

SPEAKER_03 14:37

Million dollar answer right there. Million dollar. I can just see all my listeners right now being like jotting down word for word. When do you need the answer by great in two to three days? You will message me because you need me. And that removes the whole guilt thing. I mean, busy people get stuff done. That's why people come to you to ask you to do stuff and write in the books and do the TED talks and all the things. Busy people get stuff done. We know that. Busy people are always yes people too. Why? Because they don't want to say no. However, it leads to complete overwhelm. And right now in my inner circle, we're talking about the long game. I said, if there's something that no one's talking about on the internet, it's the long game of business, right? Everyone's talking about make six figures in six minutes, sell this offer, and you'll get five million clients, use my framework and everyone converts without a sales call. I mean, no one talks about like being ridiculously consistent day after day, year after year on the things that are not sexy in building businesses, right? And have strong boundaries to be consistent and be disciplined in that. But you you've been doing this for a while, girl. I love your passion. It came from seeing the need with the healthcare field, which I can relate to so much, the burnout, the addictions. I mean, if we even want to go there, like just horrible, horrible, as we're in healthcare, the worst health ourselves, but then grew it into this beautiful community for moms and empowered moms. And I'd love for you to share kind of the birth of that and like it's just blown up. I know that you're having these big events every year. You have a free community around it. I and I just see all the amazing stories of moms that have just really found their identity because of you, because of you creating this.

SPEAKER_01 16:10

Oh my gosh. Yeah, I literally get chills. So I love telling this story. Empowered mom started with four people in my living room in 2023. And I say that because I didn't invite four, Allie. I invited a hundred. I invited every single person I knew, every single person at the gym that said this sounds like a great idea. It was kind of like a pre-launch party. And when four showed up, I was a little, I was embarrassed and I was sad. And and but something in me changed after that. Something in me said, Nope, you will deliver to these four people, and that's it. And they breathed life and they gave me permission to take the next step. And that's their purpose. And that was what they gave me. And they don't like some of them know it and some don't, but I wasn't sad when they left. I was inspired and I was like, okay, we started with four, that's okay. And we just kind of grew from there because I didn't get attached to that. Of course, we have our moments where we expected more or wanted more, but I knew on my heart that I was gonna host a conference. And when we talk about like our superpowers, right? Sometimes we forget. There was times I'm like, why, why did I think I was ever gonna be good at this? I used to plan all these nursing conferences. I'm like, how did I forget? Hundreds of people with vendors and sponsors, and I'm coordinating left and right. It was just insane. I forgot I had done that because I pushed aside this event for so long. So we really started off with like a little mini event, a launch party, and then we turn it into a big conference. So we're going on our fourth big conference this October in Detroit, in Michigan. The just the overwhelming response of community, support, and people that want to be affiliated with our brand. And I really think it's because that we breathe life into people and their stories, and we breathe life into their big ideas and we accept people who they are. You don't have to be running a business to be in empowered moms. And what we want to actually do is train people on what the message actually means. An empowered mom does not mean someone who does it all. And I think that's tricky because of the things that I've done, but it's a mom who is willing to say I'm worth it. It's a mom who's willing to take care of herself. It's a mom who who does, if she believes in ambitions, she doesn't believe in you can't have one without the other. We bring our kids along, we include them on the trip, and we remember that they are the our family is the most important. And these ambitions, these dreams can be a part of it if we do it together.

SPEAKER_03 18:21

Oh, friends, we will link the event in October in the show notes. We will link her free community too. But I love that you are like, come one, come all. I don't know that there's a lot of groups out there or conferences like that where they have like seven, eight, nine figure women, and then we have the mom that's just like, I'm worth it. I'm getting in this room. I'm gonna glean everything that that person is, and I'm gonna make new friends, and I'm gonna become someone that I'm not, just like you did when those four ladies left your home that day. You're like, it changes you. It always changes you. I mean, how how perfect timing for this? I have three out of four of my kids homesick today, and I have all podcast hosting. I had two big, huge sales calls, my AI coaching, and I'm closing out my marriage made in heaven. My very first event, live event, and my husband's like, God bless. Like, I hope you do good. And I'm thinking, okay, Lord. You know, they just husbands just kind of go off to work, like, best of luck with everything you got, right? Like as he pulls away. But this is why moms, I'm obsessed with moms, right? Like, my keynote is marriage motherhood millionaire. And the the motherhood piece of that is like really what is like my whole core message because they've always been by my side. There's no way that I would do anything different. I couldn't imagine still being in nursing and then have to take today off because I got three out of four kids sick. I'm like, you know what? You guys are great. Mommy's gonna pop in and out. We're gonna knock this out. Is everyone in? Go team. And they're like, let's go. And but that's what they've been raised as. They've been raised as entrepreneur kids and they think all things are possible. Like the things that Anna, the little miracle girl, is doing on YouTube and like shorts and making these things, and she has almost more subscribers than me. And I'm just like, where are you? Like, she's like, Oh, I've just watched you do your stuff and my my team just taught her a loom video of how to make these cover. I mean, it's just so cool, Dr. M, to see your girlies and my girlies and my sons just be raised up saying, Hey, there's a choice. We can do things differently, and you're gonna be alongside of me while we do it. Because the generation before us, they didn't have as many opportunities as us, right? And the generation after us, they're gonna have way more in opportunities. So I love how passionate you are about your daughters and how you decided to take this, right? Your life lesson of watching your mom and trying to people please your way and to make her happy, which never made her happy, into who you are today. What is like the biggest key you could say to the mom who like she might be kind of more like your mom? She might be just be stuck in circumstances and not feeling joyful. And maybe it's a decision that she's made, or maybe she really feels stuck. What would you say to that mom today?

SPEAKER_01 20:45

Yeah, I mean, I think, well, first of all, I know that these ambitions are not for everybody. And so I'm not sitting here saying one way or is better than the other. And I think that's really important to not walk away, walk around. There is no mom shaming anywhere ever in my life. We're all surviving, we're all trying to thrive, we're all, we're all making the choices that are best for us. But when I see one that's kind of suffering in being stuck or saying, you know, I want more, or most of the women just want to return missing identity pieces of themselves. Like I want to see, I want to laugh more, I want to see this person more, and I, or I miss who I am. Well, then that is the decision. Then what is it that you like and what lights you up? And how do we get you a little bit more of that? And I say that like really gently at first because a lot of women will say, I don't have time, I don't have this, I don't have that, which we know that you can you can create these things that you really want. But if you're saying to me, or if I was coaching you and you're saying this is the one thing I know to make me feel better, let's just say it's taking better care of yourself, because that's a key that a lot of women don't even do. Everybody has something, and what's left for me at the end of the day, well, here it here comes Dr. Emily with that's a choice, though. You chose that. And so let's help you unwind that choice because it really is deeper, it's peeling that back. Saying, where do you not think you're worthy enough to let's just say take 15 minutes and exercise, right? Does exercising have to equal what it equaled before? Buying the gym membership, the clothes, the this? No, let's just start with moving your body because if you're doing zero, let's do something. And it's really retraining your brain first that it matters to which I gotta get, I gotta get back to nursing for a second, but like, you know, systolic and diastolic blood pressure. Everyone I think understands the blood pressure. You have the two numbers. The systolic is the push and drive, which that's what many of us are good at. We're like, this makes this is productive. It's so, but it's so dangerous because it's productive. Well, not many people realize that that diastolic number is even more important because and more productive, because this part of the heart is receiving blood to then get the oxygen to give life to the rest of your body, and you can't have one without the other. So, where in your for the busy ambitious mom, where are you pulling that back, fueling yourself? Again, many people think it's like it's gotta be the vacation or the spa day. No, right. It could be 10 minutes right now as you're listening to this podcast, go put some sunshine on your face. You know, it could be 10 minutes that you actually ate lunch. And notice how I said 10, not like 30, because really at the end of the day, we just got to get the fuel in. But don't forget that you matter and you got to take care of yourself along the way. So, so if you are stuck, I want you to ask yourself, what is it? There's something that's missing that you know that if you we could start there and get you a little bit more in that direction, you know, maybe it's a hobby, maybe it's just whatever that may be, but a lot of it comes with worthiness and believing that that you can.

SPEAKER_03 23:31

So good. So good. I actually was just on with my AI coach today and he's like, you know, summer's coming up. How do like high-performing women like transition to like still be able to do what they do and show up? And he's like, you know what? I would I would start telling people to start taking their calls outside, start going for a walk, start, you know, doing things out in nature. That way people are getting their walk-in, they're working out, they're feeling good, they're getting fresh oxygenated blood, and you're you're taking the Zoom calls as you go. You're taking the the podcast as you go. There's always a way to make things all work together for good. And as moms, right? It is a choice. And so this has been so awesome. I am so, so, so honored to have you. I know you have to go pick up girlies from school and you're doing the mom thing, transitioning out of the home office into the mom office. But what's one final thing that you would like to leave all these listeners today?

SPEAKER_01 24:18

I really want to hit on that it's important that you start training people that you're not gonna be so quick to respond.

SPEAKER_02 24:24

Oh she just dropped a bomb. She started with the bomb and she's dropping a bomb on the end, friends. Let's go.

SPEAKER_01 24:31

Yeah, I mean, you really you don't you don't have to be everybody's yes, and especially if you're complaining about it. Sorry, I had to go there because that's the reality. Everybody needs me. We all want to be needed. It's awesome. It feels so good, especially like people pleasers. Like, oh, that's how my mom was. Everybody needs me. But yeah, but then you're exhausted and then you're you're taking it out on the inside of the house. And so it's really that. It's it's learning how to train people that you're not gonna be so quick to respond. So even if that means, let's say someone texts texts you and you do have the ability to help them, it's still not emergent though. See how long you can go without responding. It's like an experiment. I guarantee you're probably gonna start with anxiety because you're like, well, but I can, but I can right now. No, no, no. Stand up, put your phone in the other room, go walk, just walk around the house and see what that does. And that's telling you that there's like almost an addiction to respond quickly. So then almost, you know, time yourself. So so just learn how to not be so quick to respond. I guarantee it will start helping you not burn yourself out as much. And remember that if you're afraid of forgetting, you already know I gave you that tool. They're gonna they'll remind you if they if they didn't find the answer yet, because remember, nobody's patient. I'm not patient.

unknown 25:37

No one.

SPEAKER_01 25:38

If I don't get that answer right away, guess what? I'm going to Google, I'm gonna go figure it out because and now, sorry, I know you're like, let's end this podcast. One more thing. No, keep going. This is good. It also wasn't your children. One one little tip with your children. I started this when they were two. You can judge me all you want, but I'm a no judgment zone mom. So my two-year-old, I was pregnant with the second one, and she's like, I probably heard mommy, I need a snack. Mommy, I'm hungry, mommy, this, mommy, that, 17 times before 9 a.m. And I was like, I'm the volcano is gonna explode. Like I could feel I'm like, this is happening. Oh my gosh, I'm gonna start yelling at my two-year-old. I said I'd never be the yelling mom. And before I did it, I paused. I considered, wait a minute, there might be another option here. And I took a deep breath and I said, wait, kiddo, what would you do if I couldn't help you right now? What would you just and she looked at me like, what do you mean you're not gonna help me? And then I was like, no, really, like, show me. You want a snack? Like, what would you do? What if I couldn't get to you? Because we're I'm about to have a second baby. Well, she got a little step stool, opened the little cupboard, got the snack, made extra crumbs, who cares? And she had this huge smile on her face and she's like, I did it.

unknown 26:36

Come on.

SPEAKER_01 26:37

And from that moment, I go, Congratulations, you will forever now get your own snacks. A yeah.

SPEAKER_03 26:45

Best ever. It was a choice. And you gave her a choice too. Like, hey girl, you have choices. You can keep yelling at mommy five million times. You know, I told my kiddos, you know what, I'm podcasting, you cannot ask for me. I know that you can get what you need to get done. Or there's three of you now. You can all help each other, right? Like, let's teamwork this and you'll get it done. Of course, I'm like setting up and I hear, Mom, mom, like, no, no, I just I gave the pep talk. Like, go back to the pep talk, go back to what you know to do. Y'all can help each other. But I think that makes such strong, secure people too, Dr. Emily, because I feel, you know, some of these people they get raised up and they like literally don't know how to pump the gas or be able to pay taxes or certain things. And I think that's a disservice because then talk about anxiety. The how much anxiety they have to be like, oh my gosh, I don't even know how to like operate in the real world. But when we get these little things starting at two years old, three years old, four years of practical tools, they become those women that are like, oh no, I got this here, I can help you out. Like that, no big deal, right? Like that's empowerment.

SPEAKER_01 27:43

You're empowering someone else to figure it out. And so now you got to, I mean, we had to do it in nursing. We couldn't do it all. Nope. You know, even when I was training someone, I'd say, show me what you already know. This is great for any of your jobs, too. If you have employees, tell me what you already know, show me what you already know. And then guess what? I get to fill in the blanks. Instead of me starting from zero, that's expelling a lot of energy. Well, tell me where we're at. Tell me what you already know. Most people know more than they think. And now you're just listening. And so then you're like, awesome, you did you knew exactly up until this point. All we need to do is fill in this blank and we're good to go. And now they feel empowered because they thought they knew nothing and they came to you. So instead of just answering the question right away, this is good too to help with burnout, is say, well, tell me what you do know. Same thing with your kids. They come to you with something and you're like, give me some more information. Because most of the time they most people want to feel seen and heard. And so they think they have the wrong answer. So just wait for it. But yes, just try not to be so quick to respond and then take a deep breath before you're about to say yes. If you can, you'll learn, you'll learn after this podcast. You're like, ah, I should have done it. You can always go back. If you said yes, you can 100% go back and say, you know, I really thought about that a little bit more. I am not the best person to help you with this right now. And I love you, and I hope you find the help you need. Remember, if they don't respect that, that's a boundary. If they don't respect that, again, they can be disappointed. You have to live with that. You have to be okay with that. But if they don't respect that, that's a reflection on them.

SPEAKER_02 29:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:07

And I invite you to release that because if they're going to come back, manipulate, control, guilt trip, remember, that's because they got disappointed and you're retraining people. And this can be really light at first. It doesn't have to be this heavy, but it kind of starts with that. I'm not going to be the one that hosts every single holiday party. I would love to pass that torch and I would be happy to contribute, but I'm making the decision that I'm not going to host this year. Yeah, you think it's going to disappoint your family? Heck yeah, it is. Because they've expected that. They've had to do nothing for so many years. So true.

SPEAKER_03 29:39

It's so true. But it feels so good. It feels so good. And then I loved what you said. I know my my podcast is usually shorter. Sorry, friends are going longer. But listen, it's good stuff. So the best thing is like your mom was so for everyone that when she turned in, you took it, right? Everyone on the inside is gonna take what you don't hold your boundary for on the outside. So saying yes to less, and I love that your husband, she's got a hot husband in the police force, which is super fun. Your relationship is so fun. But I love that he's holding you to it too, because guess what? He's on the inside. Baby girls are on the inside. They get to experience Dr. Emily when she's full on yes, ma'am, to everyone, and you're carrying a lot of weight. You're doing a lot of great things, you know, and being pulled on in a lot of great directions, which are all good things. Writing national bestsellers, being a TEDx speaker, you know, building an incredible empowering mom's community, coaching, certifications, all that stuff, all great stuff, but at the expense of what? You know, my husband and I just had a heart to heart. We do date nights every single week. You know, I've shared with you the whole journey of marriage made in heaven. And we were on date night last night. And I was like, let's we always dream. We pull out a dream napkin and I'm like, let's just dream it up. So I start going. He goes, Hey, hey, hey, hey, no more pressure on you. No more pressure. It's about the babies, right? No more pressure. And I he said, Can you do this with like not having a lot of pressure behind it? I was like, probably not. Good, good, good call, good hard line. Like huge dream. It's amazing. Probably not in the season. That's okay, right? But we need people to call us out on that and know from the inside what it takes to build multimillion dollar businesses, what it takes to get on all these stages, what it takes to do things at such a high capacity, right? With little people. Your kids are little, they're not college age, right? They're still little and need a lot of mom.

SPEAKER_01 31:19

And it's not, it's not worth it if you can't share it really with the ones you love. And so when they watched me burn myself out a couple of years ago, I mean, really, my husband's like, I wish you to just go back to work, like go back and be a nurse, because this is worse. I mean, imagine early entrepreneurship. It's never no offense, anybody who's in it. It's well, it's not offensive. It's just hard. It's it's the hardest, I think, is that first year or two because you're trying to figure out who am I in this.

SPEAKER_02 31:42

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 31:42

I I don't say that it's never not hard. I will choose this hard any day. And I lean so much on my faith. There is no way that God is putting us on this earth to burn ourselves out. And in fact, I know for a fact that He wants to see us happy, happy and vibrant and full of love. Yeah. So if I feel me getting pulled, there's times it's just I just said too I did say too many yeses. And so I'll go back. And Allie, we've done this before. You're like, I'm like, I gotta reschedule. I'm like, got it. You think, do you think I was crying about it? No, I'm crying because I can't wait for this conversation. But I was like, oh, I just got a free hour. Oh my, you know what I mean? Like I went and did something else with that time that was beautiful. So I thank you for this so much too. And but I hope that gives other other people listening permission that, you know what, my plate got a little full this week. I gotta move a few things around, but I still can't wait to have this conversation next week. So think about it. If you we also talked about hormones and cycles, but that's a whole nother thing. There's times in my cycle where I'm like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. So it's okay. I think if we can all just have some grace with that, yes, and and also maybe not be so quick to say yes and respond. I was a yes person on the spot every time for so long. And it was it was fine until it wasn't. And now it's I need to make mental space, emotional space for my children. I need to be regulated in 15 minutes when I go and pick them up. Like you said, I gotta put the different hat on. They do not want to see work mom checking our emails. It's not right, that's not the life I want them to see. So I hope your listeners can walk away with saying yes to less, less people pleasing, less burnout, less waiting for approval. Come on.

SPEAKER_03 33:20

Oh, my girl, I love you. I am so thankful the Lord brought us together and just I love championing you on. So I just when I met her, I just said, Oh, big stage Emily. She's like, What? I'm like, no, you're like meant for the big stages. Like, and then next thing you know, like I'll just get like messages from her, selfies of her worshiping and the backstage of TED talks. I'm like, yeah, remember I told, yeah, I saw that. Saw that in you before. Maybe you saw it in yourself. But what I love is that God, God's so amazing like that. He's like, no, no, no. I always, I always laugh like it. I always think God just smiles, like, oh, cool, they finally met. Oh, praise God. They're in each other's life. That's what I wanted. So I love you. Thank you for being one of my first guests on the For His Glory CEO podcast. And you guys, we will link everything or how to find Dr. Emily and be a part of her amazing empower moms and buy her books, you guys. I promise you. Especially if you can really relate to this, live like, live your life for you, not your mom's. Thank you. I did not want to screw it up. If you can really, if this really resonated with you, I promise you. I read this book right away, and my mom is my very best friend, right? But it was so good for me to get like some serious aha keys for my own girls. So even if you already have like the bestie mom or you didn't see that, what about you that's raising girls? You don't want them writing, you know, things that, hey, my mom had a choice, but she just chose, you know, not to put this as a priority. So it is good for absolutely everyone. And then your newest book is coming out too, which, yes, I don't know if you want to share because I know you don't have a do you want to share?

SPEAKER_01 34:39

Sure. Yeah, it's just we're doing an empowered mom's collaborative book. So think like, yay, think like chicken soup for the soul, right? Where where there was all these beautiful collaborative stories. And so we're doing empowered moms stories of all sorts of different stories of women who had transformations. Some were very hard, some are heavy, some are beautiful, some are advice you'd give the younger version of yourself. And they're just so beautiful. And I really wanted to use this platform of empowered moms is to help more women's voices get seen and heard. So we've got stages and speakers and all these things on our big events, but I was like, something in me felt called to do, I call it a quiet energy. I don't know why I'm saying that, but I think a book is a quiet energy because it's like you can nurture it and you can put it all together into this beautiful story. I mean, obviously, obviously when it launches, it's not quiet, but something in me just needed to like pull it closer because not everyone wants their voice on the stage. They want to keep it in a different energy. And we, I am just so excited. Yes, it's coming out in July of 2026, and I cannot wait to have you all read these 14 incredible stories.

SPEAKER_03 35:41

Ah, so good. So we will get that link to you guys. I am again just so grateful for Dr. Emily to be here today. And I know that you guys have gleaned so much. Say less yes to less. I I'm literally gonna put that on a post-it note today. And I love you, thank you. Thank you. You've been tuning in to For His Glory CEO Podcast, where unshakeable faith meets bold business strategy to equip you for your next level. If this blessed you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it. And if you're a businesswoman that's looking for the right circle to scale big, we got you. Click the show notes and hear more about our For His Glory CEO community, which is one of a kind. Amazing! And remember, we're not just building businesses, we're building the kingdom of God. Until next time.