Why Most Men Never Ask For Help W/ Mitchell Davis

How can I get started with fitness when I feel overwhelmed and short on time?
What are the keys to mixing faith, leadership, and health in my role as a man?
Why is it so hard to stay consistent with fitness — and how do I break through?

This week on the MOI Podcast, we dive deep with Mitchell Davis of Warbird Fitness to unpack the connection between faith, fitness, and personal development for men. Mitchell shares his journey from battling addiction to building a legacy of love as a father, coach, and leader, reminding us all that taking care of ourselves isn’t selfish—it’s essential. Learn why pursuing health for yourself isn’t just about discipline, but about finding joy, humility, and embracing the journey, not perfection.

Discover practical advice for getting started, building consistency, and moving past information overload and comparison. Mitchell offers actionable wisdom on why mentorship and community are crucial, how to push through fear and ego, and the importance of lasting motivation rooted in self-respect and love for others.

If you’re ready to step up as a husband, father, and leader, this episode will encourage you to make real changes—starting wherever you are. Subscribe and join us as we learn how faith, fitness, and brotherhood can help you lead your family and leave a legacy that matters.

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#mensfitness #christianmen #leadershipdevelopment #fatherhood #menshealth #personalgrowth #menofiron

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

You should want to pursue fitness for your own self. And your desire to pursue fitness can and should be as simple as it's just fun.

SPEAKER_00 0:18

Welcome back to the Men of Iron Podcast. This month we are jumping into faith and fitness. And I'm super excited because I think this is an area that guys think about, want to get better at, but maybe don't know how to or don't even know where to start. So this month we're bringing in a couple guests to help us be able to kind of talk through that, what that looks like, why those two things are important, why fitness is important, why we need to take care of our bodies. But today I have a really cool guest with me. I met him a couple of years ago working at the gym. And it's been really exciting to learn a lot from him in that time. Um, some things I had no idea about. And he taught me tons of just like let him rip and tear, we let him do it on the field, let's let him do it in the weight room, and just training kids and also training adults and how those two things are completely different. Um, but today we have Mitch Davis with us. Hey, thanks for having me. Absolutely, man. So I just want to get into first about you, who you are, what you're about. Um, you've taught me tons. I know we didn't spend tons of time together, but when you we were together, I learned tons on thank you, how to lift, how to how to push kids, how you got to treat some people different, older generation, younger gender generation, yeah, and why it's so important. So can you just first, who are you? What are you up to?

SPEAKER_02 1:34

Uh I'm Mitchell Davis. Um, I own my own uh fitness company, Warbird Fitness. Uh and embedded within that, I have uh individual clients. I train clients all over the nation uh thanks to the internet. Uh and then I'm also in the Warwick School District where I uh train uh teams. So I get a little bit of both, right? You have the individual, uh, the one-on-one stuff, and then you get that team environment. Um, so I love it. Every day is a bit different. It keeps me um, it keeps me going forward for sure.

SPEAKER_00 2:04

That's so cool. When you when you're looking back, you've have you always trained like that? Have you always, I know you have Word Word now, but was your training always through individual online or where'd you start? What'd that look like?

SPEAKER_02 2:17

Uh so uh I had the phenomenal uh experience of having both a really selfishly minded high school coach and a high school coach who loved me as a human being. And so I saw that firsthand. It didn't matter what I was doing off the field, it mattered if I produced wins, and we didn't really end up producing a lot of wins. And then inversely, I had a track coach who demanded the most out of me because he he knew I could reach that level. Um, but he also saw to it to learn who I was off the track. And so my father, uh clinical psychologist for 37 years, owned his own practice. My mother is CEO of Pennsylvania Counseling Services. So dinner conversation was psychology. I loved it, you know, understanding other humans. And so I went off to college uh to one day hopefully be a psychologist like my dad. Came home after college, and my high school history teacher, uh who was also a phenomenal human being, said, Hey, I just need some extra help on the football field. I said, I don't know football. He said, help out in the weight room. And so I kind of latched onto that. Um, and I got to see sort of my bachelor's degree, psychology degrees sort of playing out in real time, getting to learn who these kids were. Uh, and then from there, I just kept going on for advanced studies. I love, I love uh studying, I love digging into it, I love learning. Um, and so now, however many years later, um, I have a PhD in health and exercise, which is a weird thing. Um, you know, doctor of exercise is kind of weird, right? Um, but along with that is just learning as you go and learning of the people in front of you. So um it's always been different. I've been embedded in different gyms, I've worked in physical therapy clinics with chiropractors, uh, and man, that's that's been exciting. And and you just kind of learn of all these different approaches and you kind of climb this mountain of certainty, and then you fall off and you go, oh my gosh, like none of it matters. What are we doing? And then you sort of start to build yourself back up and say, you know, you kind of you you pick and choose, and this person needs a little bit of that, that person needs this. So it's been what now, 16 years of this. So a lot of ups and downs, a lot of uh, I certainly know this, a lot of I know nothing. Um, it's a pendulum though, right? As long as you're kind of going back and forth. Don't get stuck on either side.

SPEAKER_01 4:41

That's where, that's where things kind of fall apart. Hey guys, I hope you're enjoying listening to this episode of the Met of Iron Podcast. I just want you to take a moment to think about what is your goal? Seriously, what is it? And think about each area of your life. Once you finish this episode, I want you to go down to the description actually, and I want you to click the link that says score your core five. That's where you'll rank your faith, your family, your friends, your fitness, and your finances and talk about honestly how you're doing in each area of your life. And at the bottom of that sheet, you're gonna come across where it says, all right, what's your goal to move the needle in any of these areas of your life? And you're gonna put it down and say, all right, this is how I'm doing. And then I want you to leave a comment about what your goal is so that way you can see, all right, these are the other guys that are setting a goal. And then we're gonna ask you two weeks after that to hold you accountable. This is how we change a culture one man at a time. Enjoy the rest of this episode.

SPEAKER_00 5:34

That's good. When you think of back through all that time of learning, experience, different settings, what was one of the biggest takeaways out of that? You think through, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 5:45

Yeah. Uh so I don't even have to think about it. The defining moment of myself as a coach, uh, and a big part of who I am as a as a father, as a husband, as a son, as a human, um five just over five years ago, uh, my wife looked me in the eye and said, It's it's alcohol or it's your son. And and she took him and she bounced. And I had to make that decision of I have to get healthy. I have to get sober, even if it means getting to see my son every other weekend. I had to make that choice of becoming a healthier version for myself first because I might not have gotten him back. I still had to get healthy. Tragically, right as I got sober, three months later, uh a young man that I trained from 14 all the way through college, he had a house key because I trained individuals out of my garage. He had a house key. He he could come over whenever he wanted. I would hear him early in the morning downstairs. Uh, he was killed in a car accident 800 meters from my house. And it ripped me to shreds because this young individual was the epitome of refusing to allow himself to not be anything than his best. A college student didn't drink, didn't do drugs. Uh, he wanted to serve his country, he was trained to go in the military. He never missed a session. He was always on time, he was polite, he was courteous, and he got to know me as his coach, as a human being. He wasn't just there for a service. And at 22 years old, uh, his life is ended. And here I am, selfish, self-oriented, drinking, drugging. I'm living this double life. I can coach okay. I can get people stronger. And then here on the other side, I'm just the shell of a human being. And so now I'm trying to grapple with getting sober and the pain that is getting sober and losing an individual that you just love so dearly, and trying to work through that. And so that was that was this realization that coaching is more than getting a human being stronger. It is it is absolutely hurling love at another human being, no matter what. And that's coaching. It's it's two people or or a team and a coach working together for a shared goal that you must start with love. Anything that comes before that, I think you you've you've missed the boat in time.

SPEAKER_00 8:15

That's such a good point. I think so many times when we think of, I mean, I did sports growing up. I swam in college. Like I know that whole lifting, the world, the team world. And I can think back when you were saying coaches that kind of poured into your life. Like, that's huge. They were game changers for me. You I can pick the I had a tons of coaches, but you know the ones that stick out that made the difference beyond the pool or the field or wherever it was that actually like got to know you as a person. And then you would go to you would go to war for those guys. Like even on the field, like you're like, I know this guy's got my back, whether it's win or lose, you know, we're there for it all. What would you say? You were talking through training, you're talking about these different avenues, you're talking about all these hard times really throughout your life when it made that shift. When you see guys that are training, we're talking about them getting serious about their fitness, right? And they're making that shift in their life. Maybe they're coming out of alcohol, whatever it is, whatever's going on in their life. What do you think makes that tick? You told your situation, but what for a guy, what has to click for him to be like, okay, I need to make a change?

SPEAKER_02 9:17

Ah man, that's that's tough. I mean, there's anyone can can say I'm wrong because we all have our own individual stories. But first and foremost, I think uh we have to put on our own oxygen masks first. And as dads, as especially as men, uh, we wrongly think that our job is to protect and provide and to care for others and it's everyone else first. And eventually that will come crashing down on you. And for some of us, it's using and abusing because we're masking our own emotions and feelings, uh, and you just plow ahead because that's what my dad did and his dad did. Um, if you're not taking care of yourself, and then that spills into fitness, where we go, I have to get stronger to show my children what strength looks like. That will collapse. That's external motivation. But you should want to pursue fitness for your own self and your desire to pursue fitness can and should be as simple as it's just fun. We as American men have bastardized the term fun. I can't do that. It's not productive, it's not leadership, but then it all falls apart. And so, really, the individuals that I have had over the years, I've had clients who have been with me a decade or more. Okay, yes, they put in hard work, yes, we battle through ups and downs. But if you ask them, their training is fun. Not always, but most times. And I think for men, if we can kind of let go of this death grip on seriousness and allow ourselves a little bit of whimsy, we're gonna start to realize that you know what, an hour out of my day, something as simple as going for a walk, going to the gym, whatever it may be, is actually kind of fun. And holy smokes, I'm now being consistent. And a few months, a few years goes by, and now I'm a different person entirely.

SPEAKER_00 11:16

When you talk through those different pieces, and that's where I see a lot of guys, I think even for myself, where do I even start this thing at? Like I understand, like I want to be, I need to take care of my body. I need to figure out what that looks like. It may be going to the gym, it may be starting with where do you tell guys to start? Like I'm sit, they're listening to the pod right now and they're like, man, I I hear you, Mitch. Like, I know I need to do that. I need to be steward of my body, take care of it so I can be there for my kids. Yeah, like we hear stories all the time. Man, I can't even get up on off the floor to play with my kids. Like, come on, like, let's let's split they don't know where to start. And then they go to YouTube, and then you start falling into that well of, oh, you need to be going six days a week, lifting for an hour a day and ripping weights, or and guys like, I don't got that time. Yeah. So I'm just not gonna do it at all. I'm just gonna keep living the life I'm living. Where do guys start? Where would you say a great point for them to just be like, you know what? I want to take my feet fitness seriously to a certain extent, and where do I begin?

SPEAKER_02 12:10

Uh I'll give you two probably, you know, big boulders to move. First and foremost, the ground is free. Um, there's absolutely nothing wrong that if if if you were out of shape to go for a walk once a day, once every other day, just get moving. And the more we move, as long as we're eating what we previously ate, you will see some reduction in total weight, right? Um, and so it is amazing how many of us think that if I'm not chasing some type of ins sensation that it's not worth it. Uh when inversely, I'd rather you just go do something than to do nothing. Uh uh the other big one, and and this is hard for men, is men in certain areas, and physical fitness is one of them. We don't want to uh swallow our pride, our ego takes over, and we say, I can figure this all out on my own. Why would I, as a man, go ask another man for advice? Yeah. But going back, uh my my most long-term successful clients are men who are humble, sincere, amazing men that have the maturity to say another dude knows a little bit more about this area that that I am that I care about. I want, I need his help. Uh, and so whether that's that's something like one-on-one personal training, whether that's group fitness, whether that's uh finding a group, there's so many run clubs, there's so many um organizations where men get together. And um I know of a few just around here where they'll get together, they'll work out, and then they'll have an open Bible study or whatever it may be. Um, so I think I think the first step is to be able to admit to ourselves, I'm overwhelmed, there's so much information out there, and I just don't know where to start. Pick an avenue that seems interesting and follow it. You don't need to play that comparison game. You don't need to go on YouTube and say, well, this guy says this and this guy says that. Which one's better? Do you like it? If you like it, press forward with it.

SPEAKER_00 14:19

That's so good because I think when we think through, like, I was in that for a while. Okay, let's let's check YouTube and see who the hottest guy is and figure, figure out what he's doing, or you see a physique, you're like, man, I want to get like him. And then you actually see what goes into that work, and you're like, all right, I don't got the time to do all this or do that. But it's so good to hear, like, just start, dude. Like get out for that walk, just get moving, grounds free. I love that. Right. One of the other things you when we were at um Powertrain together, and one of the things I love that you were telling me about was when we train kids as well. Because we have two spectrums. We may have some younger guys listening to this that are like, man, like I'm into sports right now and I want to get, I want to take it to the next level. And one of my favorite things you said, we allow these kids to go out there and play contact football and hit each other at full speed, but yet then we're scared in the weight room and we won't let them actually lift. Like, let them rip and tear. Like, we need that to happen. Why is that so important? Why is a younger guy here that and he he's trying to figure out like, I want to take my thing to the next level, and but I'm scared or I don't want to lift that heavy. Why do we, why do we sometimes in the gym hold kids back in that way of not letting them rip and tear because we're scared, maybe, or fear? Like, can you talk about that a little bit?

SPEAKER_02 15:30

Yeah, so almost certainly uh from a personal trainer or a coach's standpoint, a lot of times, again, it's ego, and again, it's it's this, it's this fear-based idea that if I'm not providing some type of tangible service, that I will be fired. And that is, well, if you move in this way without me putting you in a proper position, you will get hurt. And so me being here is what keeps bringing the money in. That's not real coaching, and that's not why they come back. Um, so a lot of times coaches are told incorrectly that if an individual moves incorrectly, they're going to get hurt. Does that happen? Yes. But we've also seen an individual with quote perfect form also gets hurt. We see guys make an entire career out of contact sport, never getting injured. We see guys uh walking onto the field, tripping, and there goes their ankle. Um, and so this idea of injury prevention has boxed us in to don't do anything because I might get hurt. Inversely, if you go into the gym and you train yourself hard uh in the right manner, that is making sure uh I'll back up a little bit. Manage your twos. T-O-O. Too much too soon, at too high of an intensity, uh, too frequently after too much time off. Yeah, you're probably gonna end up in a bad spot. But if you manage your twos, you can go in, you can grip and rip and have a lot of fun. And okay, yeah, maybe that wasn't quote perfect form, but oh, lo and behold, they're still standing, they're still here. Uh, and so yeah, a lot of it is fear-based. Uh, and then from guys on my side, guys, guys and gals on my side, a lot of that is because I want to sell you a product and the product is me. And without me, you will fail. When in reality, the goal should be for me to teach you as much as possible that you no longer need me. Yeah. And you can go do this on your own. And for the personal trainer listening, is I have found that uh they'll keep coming back to you long after they really need you because you've built such a strong connection and they're there for when something does arise, a life instance where um, hey, an injury flare up or whatever it may be. And now I'm there and hey, let's let's take care of this. We can work around this, whatever it may be.

SPEAKER_00 17:51

One thing I want to touch on, and you said it earlier, and I I I kind of skipped over, but I want to come back to it about actually a guy humbling himself to come to a coach. Yeah. And I think like pride's huge, ego's who we as guys, that's just it. Like you, I don't want to come ask Mitch. Like, like it does this look all right? Am I lit, like I'm I could be fearful in that, or it makes me look insufficient. When we have that in our DNA almost already as men, we don't want to ask another guy, or he already knows more than I do. It puts me in a fearful spot. When you make that decision, and I'm sure you see it all when they finally that guy finally comes to you. What do you actually see happen in their life? Because we talk about discipline, we talk about accountability, we talk about, and coaches play a big part in that when you put someone like that in your life. Why is that so important to get a coach whenever you're fearful of stepping in, making the decision to do so? And why do you think it's it's played dividends in the clients you've had or what you've seen over the years?

SPEAKER_02 18:50

Uh fear and certainty are married. And so we walk through life very certain. I find it very fascinating that as humans, we're very convinced that we're batting a thousand. Every choice I make, I'm on the right side of history, no matter what. And everyone else is wrong. And that includes our fitness journey, right? And all of a sudden, I step into a conversation with another individual and we start to feel a little uncertain, but we notice a good coach is also going to be very open with you that they're very uncertain. This might be a good approach for you. It might not. And we can always change paths. And now you have two individuals coming to an agreement that there is no perfect path. There is no one right way to go. And now all of a sudden, it's okay if I fail. It's okay if I start along this path and realize along the way, hey, that actually wasn't my goal at all. Can we change? Yeah, of course. And so uh I think the biggest thing for men with that, with that pride, it's that certainty. And to sit with yourself or another individual and just be willing to admit in whatever capacity, I don't have all the answers. I'm not always right. Life is very uncertain. And what what I find amazing is if we look through history, if we look at the the greatest theologians of all time, they weren't sitting there writing these amazing books talking about how certain they were. They were grappling with just how tough life was and and how uncertain they were. But then they kept going forward in spite of that uncertainty. And whether you want to talk importance, big picture existentialism, or something as minimal as well, which weights do I pick up? But it's both the same path is allow yourself to just be uncertain and and to press forward anyway. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:45

Man, that's good. I I we had a guy on the other week and he was talking through like, just gotta get, just gotta go. Stop the excuses. Like, let's go. Like we make we can sit through and make all the excuses why not? Why I don't have the, I mean, time's always a big one. We always say, well, I I don't know where to start. Um, I I started like you were saying, and then I failed. So now I'm just giving up on this whole fitness thing and I'm whatever. What would you say to the guy that's listening? And he's we talked about a little bit, figuring it out, looking at it. Okay, I know I need to do this. You know, Mitch just said the ground's free. Like I can go start walking, I can start doing stuff. What are some other simple things a guy could do to be like, you know what? I'm I'm ready to start this thing. I'm ready to get after it. Where can I begin? Ground's free. Do I just get out and start walking? Okay, I started walking. Where do how do they build? Right. Because we talk about always like just start walking, but it's like, all right, Mitch, I've been walking for three weeks. Like, what's next for me?

SPEAKER_02 21:40

Yeah. Uh, I think the biggest thing uh that sets uh an individual up for failure when they're starting some type of fitness routine is one, they only account for perfect scenarios. And so, hey, I can get to the gym every Every day after work. And then life pops up. Little man's sick. I got a jet home. And so now I've missed Monday. And what do I do? I'm used to five days of training. I have to make that up. And so now I try to double session on Tuesday. And now Wednesday I'm exhausted. And then I'm upset with myself because why, why is is Wednesday, why why did I fail? And we're not accounting for, well, you did double the work the day before. And so instead of looking for perfect, look at good enough. Right? Perfect is the enemy of good enough. And so I don't, I don't want to know how many days you could get to the gym. What's the least amount you'd feel comfortable with? And every time I have this conversation with someone, it's like, oh, four or five days. And then it's like, well, two. All right. Let's start there. From there, we never account for the actual time commitment that it takes. We say to ourselves, I have an hour to give every day. Well, it's a 30-minute commute to the gym. And then I have to change. And then uh Chatty Kathy stops me. And now I'm in a 15-minute conversation. All of a sudden, that one hour I had to give is three hours. And psychologically, that wears down on us. Now I'm running late. Now I get home and it's just chaos in my house. And my wife is saying, you know, you said you'd be home at 6 30. And it's what are the total hours you can give a week and make sure you're including everything else? What's your travel? Give yourself extra time at the gym, whatever it may be. And I found that individuals who plan accordingly for that, one, it makes that perfectionistic attitude of five days a week. That comes down real quick. And now we're able to let go of certain pieces of a fitness routine. Hey, Chatty Kathy is chatting me up. I can't get my 15 minutes of the stairmaster, which I love today, because I told my wife I would be home. That's okay. I gave myself this amount of time and now I'm gonna head out because something is better than nothing. We don't need that all or nothing mentality, which as men, we love that, right? I'm all in. And then life gets in the way and it all falls apart. And we say, well, since I can't be all in, I'm all out. Yeah. It's okay to be mediocre sometimes. I'd rather you be mediocre for the rest of your life than be perfect for the next month.

SPEAKER_00 24:24

Yep. That's so good. Um, we always talk all the time about like guys will aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, aim, but never pull the trigger.

SPEAKER_04 24:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:34

Or they'll never get off the bank and get into the wall. Like whatever, whatever the scenario is, because it's like it's never the perfect setup, or they they set a goal. We set smart goals all the time in our fitness, and guys will set these crazy goals to your point. Hey, I'm gonna be in the gym every single morning before I go to work. Then life hits you in the face. And I'll sit there when they're making that goal, and I'm like, no, I know I you can make that goal. Go ahead, make it, but I know that's not probably gonna be how it's gonna boil down to what you're saying. All right, two. That's realistic for us. All right, let's go after two. Let's after life actually settles down or that actually happens, we can sit there and say, Yeah, two's probably realistic. And then let's get after it those two days that we're in the gym. When you for even Warbird, what you do, like, how do you set guys up for success in that piece when they say, hey, I only can do two? What's the training look like for those two days that they can give you? What is that actual environment like for them to succeed if they have a coach or even if they're just going to their local gym? What's it what's that focus on those maybe two or three days that they can actually give you of training time?

SPEAKER_02 25:35

Uh, the first question I ask any individual who walks through my doors is uh, what do you find most fun in your training? If you lead with fun, everything else will fall into place. And so maybe probably a better example uh of showing how fun works would kind of go the opposite way. And so this happens countless amounts of time through my own life talking to other coaches, is you get an adult client and they're working well with you for a couple months. And uh chances are it's different than what they did in their high school days, because in high school, you know, this is years ago before we really had personal training and strength coaches, it was just kind of a bunch of dudes going to the gym, slinging weights, whatever. And they're making a tremendous amount of progress, and all of a sudden they aren't reporting their weights. They're, they're they're missing sessions, whatever it is. And then if you actually talk to them, what do they say is, well, I kind of went back to what I did before. They were missing the fun component. Now, obviously, that fun drove results. Early on, you're gonna experience a tremendous amount of results regardless of what you do. And so we've attached success and fun together. And so now all of a sudden, progress slows down, which is natural. What do we revert to? We revert to what we remember as an abundance amount of fun, which is my origins of weightlifting, which is benching three days a week at the buddies, right? And so the first question is is what is fun to you? Uh and then from there, um, for me personally, it's it's what are your goals, short term and long term? Um, we look at things like like injury. Um, is there anything that's limiting you in any way? Uh, and then more important than injury, any injury can be worked around. Um, it's what are you fearful of? And so for a lot of people, it's like, oh, well, I hurt my back many years ago, so I don't want a deadlift. Let's talk about that. Uh, and humans don't really want to search for the truth so much as we want that confirmation. I want that validation. And so as a coach, I can't say, well, you're an idiot, right? That I wouldn't, I mean, I could say that I wouldn't have many clients, right? And so it's talking to them about, well, why are you afraid of this? What is holding you back here? Okay, when was that injury? What were you doing? And to be able to work that individual through that fear-based approach into that, hey, you know what? I am strong, I am capable, I am resilient. It's that anti-fragile mindset. Um, so fun and fearlessness are really uh powerful drivers for someone who wants to get into a training session. Um, I think we would all be so better off if we walked into a gym and uh we appreciated how robust humans are. If we were as fragile as a lot of these coaches make us think, we'd be dead. How many of us have seen an NHL hockey game where a dude takes a slap shot to the chest and he gets up? How many of us have seen an NFL uh football game where some dude just gets riven into the dirt and lo and behold, he's fine? Or we go to the gym or you go on YouTube and you see the gym fails. These people are falling down with weights on their backs and whatever. And for the most part, they get up and they're fine. But we think for whatever reason, if I move incorrectly, if I do something wrong, well, I'll never be able to walk again in my life. That's not that's just not true. Humans are so robust that we need to have the confidence that I'll be okay. Even if I'm doing something, quote, wrong, I'll be okay. And chances are you're gonna be better off for it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

That's good, man. I think, I think even for myself, I think back to times when my strength coach was like, all right, we're loading the bar up or we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna lift heavy today. And I was like, uh, you know, even being a swimmer, you think of swimmers, they don't really lift or we do lift, okay? Just they they get that we lift just as much, but when they would be like, all right, we're gonna go heavy today, or we're building up, we're coming out of the off season. And it's like, all right, we're gonna let's see what we worked all summer, let's see what you got. And it was always like, man, coach, like, I don't think I can, and there was that fear for me, all right, of like putting that bar on my back, like if I hurt my knee, like that's a wrap for the season for me, or I get hurt here, that like I'm done. And we live in that fear of like also trusting a coach. Yeah, and you know what I mean? I think that's sometimes we we have that fear, we have that ego, we have all those things we've been talking about this whole time. And we think, like, does this coach actually know what he's talking about? You know, does he actually know? And I think that's so important, like what you were saying of having the knowledge behind it of what why we say what we say. What what when you coach, like I believe in what he's saying, I trust him. He but he knows he has that love that you were talking about before that he actually does care about me. Yeah, and he wants the best for me in this situation to be stronger, to be fast, whatever it is, or just to be able to walk with my grandkids or get up off and down the floor, whatever it is, whatever their goals are. I think it's so exciting. What's a piece? And last two questions here for you.

SPEAKER_04 30:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:40

Um, when you have guys, we've talked through, you know, the fear maybe holding them back, you're coaching, you have that love forward as you're approaching them, they're setting their goals. What's some motivation for a guy as a coach that you're gonna give them? Like, why is it important to maybe have a coach and that motivation that's gonna keep them showing up, keep them coming back? Like, and what are you reinforcing day in and day out for them to be like, you know what, this is important for me?

SPEAKER_02 31:08

Uh yeah, uh it's it's it's more obvious with your athletes, uh, but this permeates through adulthood, is that as a man, somehow your lovability is attached to what you can do. And and we see this all the time. Go to any given athletic event, even at the high school level, is if my son's not winning, whether that, whether his team's winning or his stat line is great, well, somehow he's not worth it. And whether we say that as dads or not, young men feel that. Uh, and so to me, uh my my guys out at Warwick are strong. For high schoolers, they are strong. I have guys capping out on we we have no more space in the bar for squats. We have guys hang cleaning in the 300s. These guys are fast, they're aggressive, they put in the work for for year after year. But the most impressive thing I get out of these young men is the ability to look another man in the eye and say, I love you. And they know that it doesn't matter if they hit that PR, if they win or they lose, that there's at least one human on this planet who does not care about their athletic performance if they're not a good human being. And take that into adulthood. We carry some of that with us. And now, if I'm not getting jacked like those guys on YouTube, well, my wife is gonna think I somehow failed. My kids are gonna they're I don't have an eight-pack. My kids are gonna see me as weak. Unpack that and realize your kids love you because of who you are. And then the other stuff follows. And so, really, uh, you know, I wish there was some secret recipe in the fitness realm. It's not. It comes back to how you view yourself and do you love yourself? And do you have one other person on this planet that loves you for you? And if that's a coach, great. I hope it's family, I hope it's friends, but unfortunately in the world we live in, sometimes that's not it. And sometimes that individual just needs a coach who is going to just relentlessly love them. And how awesome is it when we have that that background of baggage for someone that anytime you see them is just amping you up. Like, dude, this is so great. That's contagious. And all of a sudden you're feeling better about yourself. And now through those periods of I'm not as strong, I'm I'm I'm I'm just not feeling myself, there's at least someone there who just loves you and is encouraging you and it's going to push you through that. And then the best part is that's contagious. And now you're turning around and you're loving your kids differently. You're loving your wife differently, you're loving your community differently. So love is super contagious. We just need more of it.

SPEAKER_00 34:02

Love it, man. And last question for you, and this is uh I always kind of end with guests on this. What do you want your legacy to be? What as a coach, as a dad, as a leader, as you name it, all the titles that you could probably put to yourself. Like, what do you want the legacy to be for yourself at the end of the day?

SPEAKER_02 34:19

Uh, Marcus Aurelius wrote Meditations. I'm sure a lot of men have read that book. Uh Marcus tells us that I mean, it's not long after we're dead that our name's forgotten, period. Uh, and so uh my favorite author is Joseph Campbell. Uh he speaks of bliss. Uh, my tagline often is follow your bliss. And so uh my athletes will go on and live amazing lives. Uh, they'll get married and they'll have kids and they'll start their own legacy. And many of them uh might have some memories of me. But in the grand scheme of things, for me, it is that my children for the rest of my life know that their dad just loved them so much. And that is that is through following following one's bliss. And a lot of that is coming down to just just whimsy, right? In our house, we say whimsy a lot. Um, so I want my children to see that you can take this this life seriously, and you should, but get out of your own way. Stop taking yourself so seriously, reduce the ego constantly. Yeah, that's a daily thing, is check your ego. Um, and so if I can be on my deathbed with my son Wyatt and my daughter Arwen holding my hand because they both knew that dad loved them, that's all I care about.

SPEAKER_00 35:36

That's it. That's amazing. Well, Mitch, I thank you so much for coming on the pod. Um, I could say it for hours. Yeah. Just keep chopping it up. But I just appreciate you just talking about things that get in our way, talking about fitness, just understanding like guys just need to get after it. Um, yeah. So I just thank you for your time and thanks for being on the pod. Yeah, thanks for having me. This was great. Awesome. Well, thanks so much for joining us on the Men of Iron Podcast. We will be back next week talking about some more fitness and just thanks again for Mitch. Thank you for being a part and watching. We'll see you guys next week.

SPEAKER_01 36:07

Thanks for listening to the Men of Iron Podcast. Be sure to like, subscribe, and share. At Men of Iron, we exist to change a culture one man at a time, and we'd love to have you partner with us. So go to men of iron.org to see how you can get involved or donate at menoviron.org forward slash donate.