Why Most Men Don't Follow Through w/ Cayden Lasher

Are you searching for practical ways to be a stronger spiritual leader in your home? 

Wondering how to find a mentor who can help you grow as a man, husband, or father? 

Curious about actionable steps to improve your faith, family, friendships, fitness, and finances?

This week on the Men of Iron Podcast, we dive deep into real-life mentorship with Cayden Lasher. Cayden shares his journey from searching for guidance as a young man to discovering the impact of Christian mentorship—first through church connections and then through Men of Iron’s Strong 27 mentorship program. Hear firsthand how goal-setting, structured accountability, and brotherhood have helped men conquer challenges in marriage, money management, and daily faith. With honest stories about wrestling with car troubles, paying down debt, and intentionally deepening relationships, this episode is the blueprint for any man ready to level up his life and leadership.

If you believe you’re not “experienced enough” to be a mentor—listen as we break down the myth that you need to have everything figured out. All you need to be is a few seasons ahead to make a difference. Learn about the Strong 27 mentorship kit and the five core areas—faith, family, friends, fitness, finances—designed to help men grow holistically while building intentional, Christ-centered goals for every aspect of life.

Whether you’re new to faith, struggling as a young husband or father, or seeking more intentionality in your daily adventure—Men of Iron wants to equip you. If you’re ready to become the man God has called you to be!

Take the Core5 Assessment:
See where you stand in Faith, Family, Friends, Fitness, and Finances—and identify your next step. Complete it and receive a small thank-you from Men of Iron.
👉  https://menofiron.org/score-your-core5/

Keep growing:
🧗 Basecamp (Start Here)
Free, self-paced resources to build discipline and grow in your Core5
👉 https://menofiron.org/basecamp-free/

🏔 Ridgeline (Grow with Others)
Group-based environments built on consistency and accountability
👉 https://menofiron.org/resources/small-group-resources/

👥 Summit (Go Deeper)
One-on-one mentorship and coaching for long-term growth
👉 https://menofiron.org/resources/mentorship-resources/

#mentorship #leadership #christianmen #manhood #spiritualgrowth #familyleadership #menofiron

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

We're saying you are the spiritual leader of your family. So, how are you leading the other people in your family closer to Jesus? Hey, welcome back to the Men of Iron Podcast. At Men of Iron, we exist to change a culture one man at a time. And we do that by offering tools and resources to invest well in men. The thing that we've been highlighting over the last couple of weeks is our strong 27 mentorship. We believe every man needs a mentor, and we do everything we can to make mentorship accessible and easy to do. It can be this thing that people think is just not for them, it's too hard. They're not perfect enough. None of that's true. All you have to be is a couple seasons ahead of the guy that you are mentoring, and you can be an effective mentor. Um, if you think you need some help with your mentorship or if you're interested in getting a mentor, uh, we will give you everything you need to be able to do that. You can find everything at menofiron.org. Uh, check out our strong27 mentorship. As we talk about mentorship, uh, we have Caden Lasher uh on the podcast. He'd been on a couple weeks ago. Yeah. So welcome back. Uh I'd love to dig into some of your mentorship story. Um, so just kind of like take us into this. Um, do you have a mentor? Have you had a mentor? Um, you actually had a mentor before you came to Men of Iron. Yep. So talk to us a little bit about what that has looked like in your life.

SPEAKER_01 1:20

Yeah. So I would say growing up, I definitely desired to have some form or shape of mentor. And I didn't know what it looked like. Um, as I had mentioned in the previous episode, like grew up where I was with my dad on the weekend, and I think during the week, I desired to have that. Well, ultimately my dad walking through me more so in the day-to-day life, and I didn't necessarily have that. So then growing up on my teenage years, I was like, well, who is this? So then growing up in church throughout youth group, my church actually had a some form of a mentor structure where each youth had someone that was like a few seasons ahead of them just walking through them. So it was like a young adult. And then it was just you would get together like once a month and basically say, Hey, where what do you learn in youth group? And then I would say around 18, 18 and a half, then that was the moment where I was like, Man, I gotta like actually be intentional about having that guy that's a few seasons ahead of me basically just to rattle questions off, like, how do I manage my finances in this way? How do I um now eventually treat my wife well? Like, um, yeah, I would say that's kind of the story of where, all right, who it kind of gave me those questions of walking through, all right, now how do I find that guy? And ultimately it was through my church. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 2:40

So you got a mentor through your church, uh, not not strong 27. It's just a guy that's investing well in you.

SPEAKER_01 2:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:47

Um, what are you what were you learning from him? What kind of stuff were you looking into?

SPEAKER_01 2:53

Yeah, it was kind of coming to the coming to the table with a conversation of here's what I'm going through my life. What do you have to what do you have to give? And there wasn't much structure around it. It was kind of just like I would text him every once in a while, give him a phone call of like maybe there was something that Victoria and I were trying to make a decision on and just being like, well, can you help in this area? Like, do you have any insight on that? Yeah. Um, so that's what it was like before Metaviron. And then after that, it was like, oh, wait a minute. This is actually a a formulated structure to be able to go into and say, like, oh, this is how I'm gonna do it in that area of my life, and then saying, like, okay, this is this is how I can maybe improve my friends. Oh. Maybe that'll actually be beneficial to like, have you tried this or have you tried that? And then just walk through it topically.

SPEAKER_03 3:43

So when you were like before Met of Iron, um, you had this guy, what's his name? Ben. Ben. So what kinds of things were you asking Ben for help with? Like, give me like a real example of like, hey, Ben, I need this.

SPEAKER_01 3:56

One of the cool stories was, and this this is actually one of the stories that I brought up like during our interviewing process of Met of Iron. It was like actually, it was actively happening as I was walking through it. So it was kind of just like a god confirm in that one way. So I had a 2011 Volkswagen golf, and that golf was uh a gift to me from my dad as my first car. So I love this car. That thing zipped and ripped and just was like smooth drive across the board. So I start I got an accident back in 2024, and that like borderline almost totaled the car. It was like my dad helped me fix it to like right up against the total line. So then I was like, I kind of felt committed to run with that car for a little while until I take it into the shop to get its oil change and its inspection. And come to find out, there was like a bunch of different things that were like coming to get wrong about it. So there was almost like 300,000 miles on a car, which typically with a D diesel TDI, like you can make those things run. But the uh diesel particular filter, basically which is filtering through the diesel, was going off and off again, like check engine light off. And I'm like, what the heck is going wrong? So I take it in and they're like, Yeah, you're probably gonna have to spend like 4,500 in the next year and a half. And I was like, ah, I don't want to keep this car anymore. Yeah. So I talked to my mentor about it. I'm like, hey, I don't know what to do about this because we don't have the money to do this, nor is it wise to go down to one car. Cause at the point in time, Victoria and I were working 45 distance from each other. So it's like we're 45 minutes away, we can't do anything about this. What do we do? So we pray together and we're like, hmm. My mentor says, I think one of my business, one of my coworkers is selling a car right now. So then he talks within the next day. Mind you, this is all within a five-day period. So starting on Tuesday, get the report on the car. Wednesday, my mentor reaches out to his coworker. He's selling a 2008 Ford Edge. And now I on Thursday connect with him, test drive the car. He's like, Yeah, pretty much my family have been riding this for the last like 12 or so years, or actually it weren't like 16 years. They've been running it. It was kind of like a side family car because they actually wanted to drive their beater car more. So it only had like 115,000 miles on it. This perfectly spick and span 2008 Ford Edge, he was like, I'm willing to do a clean swap just because he works on cars on the side himself. And we by Friday went to the DMV clean swap of a car that would have originally had $4,500 worth of repairs in the next year and a half. That we did the math across, if you then fast forward the time we do the repairs, the average annual cost of that would have been $5,000 each year for a car that's originally worth $3,500. That's insane. So from that very conversation of just walking through my mentor, of saying, like, hey, here's the problem. Here's let's pray through this, let's talk through, maybe think through how you have the resources to be able to help me in this area and just laying it out on the table was from Monday having a situation where you didn't know at all what the next step was, right? To then Friday having an immediate solution of like, wow, God, you provided through your people.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Hey guys, we hope you're enjoying this episode of the podcast. We do want to take a minute and highlight our strong 27 mentorship. Strong27 is the backbone of everything we do at Men of Iron. If you're a guy that feels stuck, if you're a guy that feels pretty good but needs a little bit more to get a little bit further, you need a mentor. At Men of Iron, we will give you everything you need for a meaningful mentorship. It's not complicated, it's not tricky. You can do it and we will resource you to do it. If you are a man, you need a mentor and we want to help you do it. So check out Strong27. The links are in the description. I think it's a cool example because a lot of times guys can think like mentorship, it's like this big heavy word. Um, it might feel like, oh man, like I'm how am I gonna disciple somebody? I don't know if I know God well enough. I don't know if I'm like a perfect dude. Uh, the example you're given is like, this is super tangible. Like, what should I do with this car? Yeah. And how can I financially set my family up to handle the fact that this car is gonna cost a lot of money? A guy that's been married longer, that's probably sold more cars, had more cars, like he can speak directly into that. And so the when we talk about mentorship and we say, hey, you just need to be a couple seasons ahead, it's a great example of a guy who was, in fact, a couple seasons ahead that could be like, hey, don't keep that thing. Um, it's gonna mess up your budget. It's gonna cost you more than you can afford. And I know somebody that can help you. And you're in a better place because of it. So when we talk mentorship, yeah, we're talking like take your faith seriously. We want you to grow as a man. Um, but a lot of times we see super tangible takeaways that are just like, hey, I can help you solve this problem. Here's how you solve this problem, A, B, and C. Let's get it done. So it's just actually a solid connection with another guy that can speak into your life and you saw the fruit of that.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:57

Um, one of the things we do at Men of Iron is like we're a mentorship organization. So we believe every man needs a mentor. So when somebody comes on staff, um, we're gonna look into like who's your mentor, who's your protege? We expect every guy on staff to have a mentor and a protege because we want to live out the mission ourselves and not just talk about it. Um, you are now on staff, what, like six months almost? Yeah. Um, probably like the first week you were here, we started Strong27 uh together. Um, what was that experience like for you? So this is now we're talking like specifically Strong 27. What's your experience with it been?

SPEAKER_01 9:36

Yeah, I would say the biggest takeaway for me was that it was just putting words and verbiage to something that I already had like in theory and in concept, but like actually brought tangibility. So the thing that was special about it was the goal for me. Because I would come away from those mentorship meetings before and just being like, I think I can do that, or like maybe I'll do a little bit of this, maybe I'll do a little bit of that, and then like, oh, I'll text them maybe a month and a half later to get together that next two months. Rather, now it's like every two weeks, you set a goal for those every two weeks, and then I'm gonna come to the table that next two weeks. So you talk about a whole month span, I set a goal. Now you get to the next two weeks, and it's like, whoa, did I do something with that? Yeah. Um, so I would say that's been like the biggest takeaway. And honestly, benefit personally is just to say, like, I'm actually doing making a difference in my life. What's your what's your goal right now? So my goal, it's interesting because we run through, we run through strong 27. Right. And then I run through strong 27 with my mentor as well. So I'm kind of hitting like two goals back to back. So my goal with my personal mentor is to have a dedicated three meals meal prep for to basically disperse throughout the weeks. So one of those meal preps is making bagels at night with my wife, Victoria. Okay. And then we prep those as bagel sandwiches in the morning, and then another one of those chia seed pudding and another one of those protein bars. So we make those, and then our personal goal is how can we condense down our finances? Right. Because we want to get really sharp on that to pay down debt and then ultimately save out for a home.

SPEAKER_03 11:18

So you're currently pursuing like a fitness-minded goal. I've seen your chia seed pudding. It's disgusting. It's it's real gross. Um, whatever, probably good for your fitness, I suppose. So that's a fitness goal. You're pursuing that, you're being held accountable. Um, you and I are working on finance goals. Um, you are making progress in that. I think, I think one of the things that's valuable about that, like I had, I had lots of men, like I would say I've I've always had mentors. I've never had necessarily a structure until I came to Men of Iron. So you can have an effective mentorship without a structure. Yeah. I didn't have guys that were like, what's your goal? How are you pursuing that goal? Did you accomplish that goal? So I was figuring out finance when I was newly married, kind of on my own.

SPEAKER_02 12:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:05

Um, because also finance is not something that you typically sit down with another guy and be like, hey, here's my books. Here's what it's we've done that. Like, here's what I'm spending, here's what's coming in, here's where it's going. Um, I think, and you can speak into this some, I think you found that pretty helpful. Totally. And if we didn't have that structure, we wouldn't be doing that. Is that fair? Yeah, I would say so. So, what's the what's the finance stuff you're digging into?

SPEAKER_01 12:29

So the finances is okay, here's our exact number of debt, here's what's on what card, here's what's on what's loan. And here's basically what's the the stuff that got us here. Now, here are all the percentages, here are like the proper next steps of like, here's what you can do to sharply like pay this one down first, then get this point, and then running through our personal finances of like, all right, what are we spending on that we can actually extract? And what can we basically just condense down for a period of time to just make sure that like we're accomplishing first things first, and that's getting that debt out of the way. And then honestly, one of the things that was really helpful was realizing there's actually a hidden cost here that you don't see beyond some of these percentages that you're actually paying without knowing that you're paying it. And once you get that out of the way, now you can start to put that towards other things.

SPEAKER_03 13:20

That was all interest rates. So we started talking like you you had a really clear idea of what you owed. I think you probably didn't have a clear idea of what that debt was costing you. Yeah. So we had a whole conversation about hey, here's the interest rate you're paying, here's what you're paying a month in interest that doesn't show up on your bill necessarily. Um, but if you can pay that down faster, you're gonna save this much a month. Again, stuff that like I didn't get when I was younger. And I'm not a financial advisor. Like I'm just a guy that has lived life a little bit longer than you have. And I think it's been helpful. And what's interesting on the mentor side is as I've been kind of coaching you through some of that stuff, it's reminding me of that stuff in my own life. So it's like, okay, like here's here's what our debt is. And unfortunately in the United States, probably a lot of us have debt. If you don't, good on you. Um it's really important to have somebody talking to you through those things that has a little bit of experience with those things that can help you get through them faster. And so I didn't have that. I have I had a lot of spiritual mentors that would have been encouraging me in my faith, um, would have been encouraging me somewhat in my job, but we didn't have specific goals with accountability. And I think that's one of the things that Strong 27 brings that's kind of unique. And it is the thing that guys consistently highlight is like, this is the thing that made a difference in my life. I've had plenty of cheerleaders that believe in me, want to push me forward. I've not had many people that are like, no, really, like, what are you gonna do this week that's gonna make a difference? And how are you gonna do it? Um what has that like have you seen that make a difference in your own life?

SPEAKER_01 14:57

Yeah, absolutely. I would say the goal part of it is the biggest thing because I come to maybe the end of the week after we have our meeting, it's like crap, did I do that thing? And then if I didn't, I'm like 10 toes down on making sure I get that thing done because I know next week I'm gonna be coming to the table, I'm coming to the table. And I don't want to say like, yeah, I just kind of let that slide because I know that's like this is the actual nuts and bolts of how my life is going. And if I let that slip, well, not only am I missing the accountability piece, but I know at the same time I'm also letting my life down. I'm also partially letting our future kids down because like I didn't make the difference, I didn't make the move in that area.

SPEAKER_03 15:43

It's just a tangible way to make sure you actually show up.

SPEAKER_01 15:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:46

A lot of us think about our goals and we think about them a lot. And it's exciting to think about them. It's a whole nother thing to be held accountable to actually accomplishing them. So I have I have two other proteges that are younger guys. Um, one of them I'm working with on he's getting married very soon. And so he's thinking through his finances on what it's gonna look like to get married. So we were talking through a budget. Um, for him, it was really tempting to just like, hey, money's gonna be crazy until we get married. So I'm just gonna spend whatever I need to spend and figure it out once I get married. I was like, no, don't do that. Like, figure out what life looks like for the next couple of months. Do your best to figure out the financial picture and try to stick to it. Because if you stick to it, you're not gonna do this thing that a lot of us do where you're gonna live on credit cards until you get married. And then once you get married, you're gonna figure out your finances. Like, okay, if you can skip that and you cannot have a giant credit card payment after you get married, it will be better for you. So that's one of the things I'm working on with him. Um, my other guy, like, we're working actually, he got married a couple months ago and he's working through like family dynamics. Like, what does it look like to be my own family unit and to care well for my wife while also balancing the fact that her parents have holiday things and vacation things they like to do? And my parents have holiday things and vacation things they like to do. What's that look like? He's also working on fitness stuff. Like, how can I make sure I'm being active the way I intend to be active? And how can I make sure that I'm eating well? Um, he works on the run a lot, so it's easy to just like grab something at a restaurant. It's not always the best thing to eat. I don't know if it's as good as Chia C pudding. Um, it definitely looks better. Um, so you know, the the cool thing about Strong27 is that it's it's protege driven. So you're the protege. Uh, the other two guys I just talked about, they're proteges. They're coming to the table with what would I like to accomplish and how can you help me accomplish it? So it's not me being like, okay, Caden, welcome to Riot's mentorship plan. And here's all the wonderful things I have planned for you. It's not like that at all. You're coming to the table being like, and this actually happened, you're coming to the table being like, hey, I think we have a financial issue. I'd like to work that out. Great. Um, we also ask for an agenda before your mentorship meetings. So the protege puts that agenda together, sends it ahead to the mentor. The mentor reviews that agenda and has an idea of what we're going to be talking about when we sit down and meet, which is really helpful. And I know when we talk to guys about mentorship, uh, especially the mentor can feel like, I don't know if I'm ready for this. Um, I don't know if I'm smart enough, wise enough, old enough. None of that matters because when the protege sends in the agenda, it's usually something that you've dealt with before in your life. And you can speak into those things. Like, yeah, I've put together a family budget before. I try to have regular financial meetings with my wife. I need to do better with that. Um, but you can grow from some of the things that I've grown from. And I'm not perfect at all. Uh, none of us are, but we can contribute something that can help guys be more successful in the long run. Um, one of the things we wanted to do in this particular podcast, because we'll we're gonna have a couple of guys talking about mentorship and the difference that it's made in their lives. Um, we get a question a lot about okay, what what is your thing and how does it actually work? So we got it right here. So um, this is our mentorship kit. This is our strong 27 mentorship kit. Uh, we do believe that the mentor and the protege should both have them. So we can accommodate you if you don't want to both get it, but it's not great. Uh, what we really want to see is that both of you get this kit. You can get it on our website. Uh, when you open it up, there's a couple pieces to it. And I am I'm just gonna walk through this whole thing so that people can understand it because we do get this question a lot. So you open it up, there's a couple different books in it. So the first thing, and you have one there, is the mentorship guide. This is what you're gonna use for every single one of your mentorship sessions. Um, and we we ask guys to meet twice a month. So you're gonna meet every other week for a year. Uh, it plays out like every every once in a while you're gonna meet three times because of the every other week structure. Um, the question I get a lot is on these books. So it's like, okay, I just want to do the mentorship. Why do I need five additional books? Um, so in our kit, there are books that are focused on the core five: faith, family, friends, fitness, and finances. You can see them right here. You know, there's a faith book, there's a family book, friends, fitness, finances. They're all right here. Um, the reason those are in there is because we have seen time and time again that when you start off with a protege, sometimes you'll get a guy that doesn't necessarily understand what it means to take your faith seriously. So you can grab this book that's in the box and you can walk with your protege through that book. And this is super simple, straightforward lessons on what it means to take your faith seriously. And there's little lessons in there about how you can use this with your mentor. So the idea is we want to make this as simple as possible for both people involved because we recognize that a lot of times people are just buying this on the website, they're not sure where to get started. As soon as you get this kit, you're gonna have everything you need to be successful. And if you sit down with your protege, he's like, hey, I'm not sure uh where to get started with my faith, you're gonna go straight to this book. But we do always tell people get started with faith first. The thing I like to highlight is we believe that you need to know God and know your purpose. You can't do that without a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Um, if you don't have a relationship with Jesus, you're just putting together a better diet and a better checkbook. None of that's gonna serve you long term because you need a relationship with God. If you don't have a relationship with God, um, you're not gonna be the man that God's called you to be. And so we encourage guys to take their faith seriously, especially in that first quarter, which we've done with you. So, what are some of the things you worked with in your first quarter of mentorship?

SPEAKER_01 21:33

Yeah, I would say, I would say faith, obviously. So your first 90 days, that's working through, keeping faith the top, and then everything else kind of filters into um, yeah, it's like the subtopics. It's like, okay, how are we doing this? How are we letting this be the guiding light to the rest of the conversation? So the biggest thing that for me and my faith over that 90 day period was man, my solitude just stinks. Like it is not great. Um, so So for us, that was working on kind of the fitness part of like, okay, how does how are these uh structures throughout the day in terms of the back how you spend the back end of your day and how you spend the front end of your day, how are they aligning to keeping God at the center? And I wasn't doing that at the front of my day. So it was kind of just us walking through, okay, how do you keep it there and stay dedicated to us? So one of the biggest things was setting it on the calendar. Like you're intentional about setting other appointments on the calendar, but your time with God is like, I'll get to it later. Yeah. So if it's your priority, it sure is not your priority if I just looked at your calendar and said, Are you a godly man? Yeah. It's like kind of the the fine finances bit. So if I looked at your budget, would it talk back to me without you using any words of to say that you're a godly man? Okay. So that was the solitude piece. And the goal that we set behind that was, all right, I'm gonna get up in the morning at this time, and that was 5.15. Well, it was actually getting up at five and then opening my Bible at 5.15. Um, but just to has say, God, where are you taking me for this day? And thank you for waking me up this morning. Yeah. That was great. I did not deserve that, but you gave it to me as a gift. Thank you, God. And then toward the back end of that 90 days was saying, okay, I want to have more intentional devotional times with my wife. What does that look like? So then we set a goal to be like, all right, we're going to bed. At this time generally, we have the dim lighting and we're just sitting down and we're reading our books. What book am I reading? I'm reading the Bible because I want to wash my wife the water wash my wife with the water of the word. And just those tangible steps were making a huge difference, not only my relationship with my wife, but also with my fitness and all pointing back to how am I keeping God at the center.

SPEAKER_03 23:44

So faith, uh, having faith goals in that first 90 days are critical because all the other core five are based on principles that God has laid out. And so when we talk about faith, we're all we're obviously saying you need a personal relationship with Jesus. What does that look like? Man, you gotta you gotta pray, you gotta read your Bible, you gotta get some time in solitude, you gotta serve other people, and ultimately you got to strive to be the man that God has called you to be. Um, if you miss on that, you're gonna miss on everything else. And I do like highlighting, we're not legalistic about it. So you're not trying to earn the love of Christ. That's a free gift from God. Salvation is a free gift from God, nothing you do is gonna earn it, but you are being encouraged to steward it well. So a lot of us just go through life busy, it's like what you were saying earlier. Like, yeah, like I I value my relationship with God. Well, where are you making time for him? Oh, well, I'm not. Like I'm just busy. Okay. So are you seeking the Lord first and foremost? And you have to do that, which is why we encourage guys to have faith-centered goals for the first 90 days. Again, so that you are intentionally developing your relationship with Jesus. Um, we do believe that Jesus is at the center of all the other ones. So when we talk about family, this is the 20 lessons book about family, we're saying you are the spiritual leader of your family. So how are you leading the other people in your family closer to Jesus? When we talk about friends, we're saying, yeah, it's cool to hang out with people. We're not against hanging out with people, but you need guys that are gonna really know what's going on in your life and help to push you closer to Jesus. If there's guys in your life that you spend a lot of time with, but they're not pushing you closer to Jesus, that's not the kind of friendships we're talking about. You can still hang out with those people, you can still have a good time, but you need men that are gonna hold you accountable and push you closer to Jesus. Uh, we talk about fitness. I like to say all the time, we don't expect that you're gonna have a six-pack and bench 500. We just want you to steward your body as the gift from God that it is. We want you to take care of your health as the gift from God that it is, so that you can live a long, enjoyable life and care well for the people and tasks that God has entrusted to you. So a lot of us don't do that. Uh, maybe chia seed pudding helps us do that. Um, when we talk about finances, like, yeah, we want you to be able to balance your books. We want you to know that you're um caring well for your money. Uh, I heard this joke from a guy recently. He's like, yeah, the budgeting method I use is the accept decline method. I just put my debit card in, and if it's accepted, I know I have money. And if it's declined, I know I don't. Okay. I mean, you get points for using a debit card, I guess, and you're not just going further and further into debt, but there are better ways to plan for finances than accept or decline. Um, we talk about finance. We're saying everything you have is a gift from God, and you want to steward those well to build his kingdom. So, how are you using your finances to steward God's kingdom? I think for you, um, you're working off this amount of debt uh that is keeping you from be able being able to build God's kingdom in the way that he would like. So you got to pay off that debt first to be able to have a little bit more financial freedom to do what God's called you to do. Um, so that's that's the core five. We're diving into this a little bit deeper than we normally do because I think we talk about core five all the time. Um, it's kind of rare that we like dig deep into what it is. So I'm gonna open up this guide. Let's do it and just help everybody understand uh what we do. At the front of this thing, this is important. Um, there's actually a covenant in here. This is more than a promise. This is like an agreement between God and man. Um, we encourage everybody to fill it out. So this is the iron covenant. It's basically you saying you, the protege, are committed to the strong 27 process. I, the mentor, am committed to the strong 27 process, and that we're gonna intentionally encourage and build each other up over the next year. So it can be tempting to skip this part. Uh, don't skip this part. Make a point to commit to each other, to make a covenant with God that you are going to take care of each other. You are going to encourage each other, you are going to hold each other accountable. It's an important piece. Um, there is a little page here that explains the core five. That's that's there for anybody that's not sure what it is. And we do always encourage people, hey, do this pre-survey before you get started. Uh, if you've done Strong 27 before, I would love for everybody to make sure you do this survey because it helps you take stock of where you're at at the beginning of the process. And then there's a post-survey at the end that's going to help you take stock of where you're at at the end. What's cool is that you'll actually be able to see how you've grown over 12 months because everybody feels like they've grown. Um, it's kind of cool to see exactly where and how you've grown. So a lot of people in their 12 months of mentorship grow in an incredible way in their faith and relationship with God. And those surveys are gonna help you see how you've done that. A lot of other people have grown in their relationship with their family. They're actually showing up, they're taking care of their wife, they're praying together with their spouse. Um, there's it's just cool to see the growth. Um, and then you're gonna set objectives. This is the 90-day goals. Um, this is important and it's something that can be missed because a lot of times it's tempting to just dive into the week to week. Uh, what we encourage people to do is every quarter plan on who you want to be at the end of the quarter. And this is like a superpower. Um, because again, we're busy, we're doing life, we have a lot of obligations that we're trying to meet. We want to encourage guys to every 90 days sit down, look at your core five, and think about who you want to be in the next 90 days. So it it helps you identify your goals, it helps you identify like who you could be at the end of a quarter, and it's a lot more intentional than a lot of us are. Um, you want to talk a little bit about your 90-day goals? Like, what's that picture look like for you? What are you what are you trying to become? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:26

So we set and we set new 90-day goals. Um, it was like, I want to say a month ago. Yeah, not too long ago. Yeah. So a big part of that other 90-day goal uh in terms of fitness was making sure my diet is in line. Um, and just saying, like, hey, how can we make sure that this is staying consistent? Because it's very easy to set. This was something that I noticed, especially at the beginning, was it's very easy to set a goal. And then two months later, you set more other goals, and then you forget about that one you set two months ago, and now that area starts falling down the line. So for me, I was like, I'm gonna make sure that this fitness and dietary goal is staying in check. It's staying in balance. And then the same thing, I just kept the the original faith goal that we had was having prayers my default and saying, okay, how am I in every circumstance just having a prayerful remark to it and saying, God, I'm staying on task and in alignment with you, to where I'm not just like making decisions just because I think it's might be the best decision. Um, so I would say those 90-day goals have been super impactful.

SPEAKER_03 30:30

They help a lot because it's kind of visionary. Like, here's who I want to be in 90 days. And then you can break that 90-day goal into smaller goals that you can actually achieve. So it's it's exciting to be like, hey, in three months, I want to be a guy that has prayer as my default. But if you don't break that into smaller goals, it's not gonna happen. Yeah. And so if you have this aspirational goal that's like, man, I just want to pray to God about it. That's just like the top of the mountain. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good thing. Yeah. But what makes Strong 27 even better is now we're saying, okay, if in 90 days you want to have prayer be your default, you want to ask God about everything in your life, what are you doing about that this week? And how can I hold you accountable to that? So that's where this 90 day goal thing is important because you're gonna use that to shape your week-to-week goals. Um, anytime you think about who you want to be in 90 days and break it into smaller chunks, it's way more achievable. Um, now you're just gonna dive into the meetings. And this is a predetermined structure for every time a mentor and a protege meet. The first thing you guys need to know is that we want proteges to send an agenda at least 24 hours before the meeting every time. And that helps the mentor know, like, okay, my protege wants to talk about this. I'm gonna come to the table prepared to talk about this. And what's interesting is it can feel like they're gonna bring some big crazy thing to the table that you're not gonna have any experience in. That rarely happens because a lot of times they're very tangible concerns and they're real life things that men have gone through. So you're probably gonna be equipped to deal with them. So you the protege is gonna go down through this agenda, they're gonna figure out the things they want to talk about, they're gonna send that off to the mentor and make sure the mentor has it in his hands 24 hours before they meet. When you meet, you're just gonna go through this. And it's a pretty straightforward structure. You're gonna review anything that you talked about previously. You're gonna review the goals that you set the the last time you met. So uh for Caden and I, like the last time we met, we were working on a budget. So it's like, hey, Caden, did you finalize that budget and are you sticking to that budget? That's me holding him accountable to the goal that he set. And what's cool is it's genuinely a goal that he set. So I'm not holding him accountable to something that he has no interest in pursuing. I'm just helping him move forward. Um, every time you meet, you're gonna talk about what scripture you're reading and any questions you have about it. We don't expect you to have a seminary degree to be able to answer these scriptures. Um, it's really just making sure that both of you are in God's word, you're seeking his direction, and you're trying to apply what you're reading to how you're living. We're not doing, uh, we're not, we're not reading the Bible just to brag about how much we've read the Bible. We're reading the Bible so that we have direction from God, direction from the Holy Spirit in how to pursue these decisions that we're making. And that's going to be a part of every single mentorship conversation that you have. Um, next, you're gonna talk about what issues come up. This is this is probably my favorite part of the mentorship because any given day, like different issues come up. So it's like, hey, we've been working on finance, but I've got this weird marriage thing I need to work through. Can you help me figure this out? Hey, we've been working on fitness, um, but I got this really interesting faith thing that's been really bugging me. I heard this sermon, I want to talk about it. So, this I would say that part of the mentorship meeting changes every time. Um, but it makes it valuable to the protege because the protege can come to the table and say, hey, this came up. I need help with this. And you can talk about it. And again, you're not expected to be an expert. You're just expected to bring your life experience to it. Um, finally, you're gonna set a goal for the next meeting. And that's everything we've been talking about goal setting and accountability. Now, the goal is gonna be set on there's always this little page here that is the core five. Like, how are you doing? Faith, family, friends, fitness, and finances. You're gonna write in there every single time. So it's every two weeks, where you're at in your faith, where you're at in your family, where you're at in your friends, your fitness, and your finances, and you're gonna put a number on it. And the way that I like to clarify this is when you set a goal, um, don't set a goal that's gonna move your number from a two to a 10 or a one to a six. Just try to move it half a point. Like, what is one thing you're gonna do in the next two weeks that's gonna move half a point? Because when you do that for whatever 26 sessions, you're gonna notice an incredible change in your life because you've just been making small changes that compound over time and make a big difference. Um, and you're gonna, you're gonna set that goal, you're gonna tell your mentor what that goal is. And the next time you get together, one of the first things your mentor is gonna say is, Hey, how are you doing on your goals? Did you accomplish the thing you said you were gonna accomplish? Is this tracking with what we've been doing?

SPEAKER_01 35:15

Totally. Yeah. I would say I do want to share one of the biggest, one of the biggest stories for me was actually one of the more minuscule things that was just like, I'm gonna do this simple thing. And if it works, it works. If it doesn't, it doesn't. And that was on the friends category. So we're walking through Strong 27 and like we hit the Friends category, and I'm like, uh, honestly, I'm really not doing great in it. So we were like, okay, how can we move the needle just a little bit? And I was like, you know what? That little like pinned conversation features on your phone. I was like, I'm gonna pin every single one of my closest, like five group of friends that are prayer for brothers that I can count on and be like, if I'm gonna shoot them a text, they're gonna hit me one back and they're going to be praying for me. I was like, you know what? I'm really not being a good friend because I'm not making the intentional steps to pray for them. So what I did, I pinned every single one of their contacts. And time and time again, I would say three of those guys. I have a story of where I was like, man, I f I feel like I should just mesh with this guy. And the message they get back to me with was, this could not have been a perfect timing. I actually really want to talk about that. It was like, wow. God, you were perfectly aligned to speaking to me through that and then connecting both of us at the perfectly appointed time to where we were able to connect and strengthen our friendship and reliance to be like, I know that guy's praying for me. I know he's able to hold me up when I'm down.

SPEAKER_03 36:43

It's the difference that um intentionality makes. So I think one of the biggest things that Strong27 brings is it helps us be more intentional about the things that we already know we want to do. And so if you have a goal to be more intentional with your friends, um, and you know your mentor is gonna ask you how that's going, you're gonna have to take a couple of steps. Um, but you benefit from those steps. Like it's not this disciplinarian thing. It's like, hey, did you do it? And you did, and you probably have stronger friendships because of it. Yep. Um, so there's a lot of power in our mentorship. I will say, like on the goal note, um, because we get a lot of questions about these five books that are included. We have a lot of guys that are like, I don't know if I even need those. Um, you can make it a goal just to go through two or three chapters of this book. That's why they're included. So, hey, before we meet again, let's both of us read four chapters from 20 lessons that build a man's faith. And when we come back to the table, let's talk about what stuck out. Those books can help you have a lot of really powerful conversations because it's gonna help you think through some things you haven't thought through before. Uh, one more thing to highlight is every quarter, you're gonna recap the previous quarter. So, just like every quarter, you're gonna talk about the man you want to be in 90 days, you're also gonna talk about the growth that you've experienced over the previous 90 days. We wanna give guys a place to celebrate. Like there's gonna be things that happen that you're really excited about. And we want to take a minute and just celebrate those wins. Uh, there's gonna be times where there were major obstacles that 90 days ago you thought you could not overcome and you stuck to it, you set goals, you were held accountable, and now you've achieved something that you never thought possible. We wanna talk about those obstacles, how you overcame them, and we want to celebrate those things. And then finally, again, you're gonna talk about who you want to be in the next 90 days, and you're gonna keep this process going. Um, one of the things I love, and I do, like I love it about Strong 27, is anybody can do it. You have what it takes to be successful. It's not this mystical, unachievable thing. Um, we're gonna put the tools and resources in your hand to equip you to be able to do this, and you're gonna see the difference that it makes. And a lot of times when we talk to mentors, um, they're they're kind of like sheepish about the fact that they think they grew more than their protege did. The other thing I really like is that after you've been a protege for 12 months, um, because of the experience through Strong 27, you're gonna have what it takes to invest well in another guy. And this is how our impact impact multiplies. Um, and it's not about us, it's ultimately about Jesus. We're trying to really intentionally build his kingdom by building stronger, more effective men. Um, but you're gonna have what it takes to do it. You you have what it takes to do it right now. Um, I just love how this kit just makes mentorship very achievable. It's not too hard. You have what it takes, you can do it. And the other thing that I love is that when we do this in partnership with an organization, you see the impact that it has on that organization. So we have several churches that have been working with us for 10, sometimes 15 years, um, where guys come in, maybe new guys, and they pair them up with a mentor right away. The first thing is it's pretty cool because a lot of churches are trying to figure out how to make new people feel more connected. So we have a church that when a new guy comes in, he does like a new member form or something, like a visitor form, they just come to him and say, Hey, we have this mentorship running. Uh, we would love to offer you a mentor. That means a lot to guys. Now, a lot of guys might not say that, but I promise you, it means a lot to them. And when they get paired up, they're being invested in, they're getting passionate about the change they're seeing in their own lives. They're being becoming more passionate about the work that's going on in that church. And when you see this happen across a whole church, sometimes we might have 20, 30, 40 proteges. Um, just think about the the change that's happening in those men's lives, in their families' lives, in their kids' lives. It makes a measurable, meaningful difference that you can actually see and you can actually feel. And a lot of times when we work with organizations like churches, uh, they'll do like a big kickoff where they challenge guys. Hey, you need a mentor. Uh, if you want a mentor, sign up in the table in the back. But then they'll also do big celebrations at the end of that 12-month period. Hey, we have a couple of guys that have made a radical difference in their lives. We want to tell their story. We want their wives to tell their story, we want the kids to tell the story. It makes a huge difference. And I think one of the cool things that Strong27 does, particularly when it's paired up with an organization like a church, like a business, um, you just see a lot of that impact a lot faster. And it's across the board. And so if you are a church, if you're a business, if you're an organization that is interested in offering something like this in your organization, we would love to talk to you. Uh, you can send us an email at info at menofiron.org. You can also just check out all these resources uh at menofiron.org. Um, we would love to get some of this stuff in your hands and help you because we have seen that it helps to build a meaningful culture of discipleship that doesn't feel uh too churchy. It doesn't feel like you have to be led by a bunch of master's degree seminarians, uh, doesn't feel like only your pastor can do it. You can build a culture where the men in your organization are investing well in the other men in your organization and you will see the difference uh really sometimes in the first 90 days. You start to really feel a significant difference. So is there anything else you want to add to this conversation?

SPEAKER_01 42:03

Yeah. And I just want to speak into that piece of if there's a guy out there, if you're listening, man, and you're thinking, I don't know if I have what it takes to be a mentor to just pour into another guy that's a couple of seasons behind me. I just want to encourage you, man. You absolutely have what it takes because God has taken you through some things that I bet you there's somebody that needs that encouragement that you have. And we provide the resources to be able to do it. But also, even to speak on it personally, like I'm 20, married a year ago, and our babies do any day of the week now. And I personally have a protege that is a single guy that's just looking to say, how do I, how do I effectively walk out a godly relationship into marriage? And it's like he's looking to me for those saying, Hey, how did you do it? How did you walk through that? And then I'm just able to give him some practical tips of here's how God walked me through it, here's what I did that you can actually do better next time around and you can improve on that in your own way. I love it. Thanks for being on, man. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 43:03

Um, thanks for being a great protege. It's exciting. Thanks for being a great mentor. Yeah, thanks, man. Um, so if if you heard this conversation or even some of the conversations we've had previously and you're interested in strong 27, we do want to talk to you. Uh, just reach out to us, info at menoviron.org. You can check out all these products, resources, services on our website. Um, go check them out. They will help you and they will help you make a difference and ultimately build God's kingdom. So thanks for listening. We'll be back again next week. Thanks for listening to the Men of Iron Podcast.

SPEAKER_01 43:32

Be sure to like, subscribe, and share. At Men of Iron, we exist to change a culture one man at a time, and we'd love to have you partner with us. So go to menoviron.org to see how you can get involved or donate at menoviron.org forward slash donate.