Let’s Taco ‘bout it W/Rukky

Men's Mental Health Month: From Survival Mode to Self-Care

• Season 2 • Episode 1

Share episode

Send us a text

This episode tackles the critical topic of men's mental health, highlighting the importance of breaking the silence surrounding men's emotions and the damaging effects of emotional suppression. Men's Mental Health Month provides an opportunity to acknowledge the unique challenges men face and create pathways toward healing and emotional wellbeing.

• Men are 3.9 times more likely to die by suicide than women in the US
• Society teaches men to suppress emotions through phrases like "man up" and "don't cry"
• The difference between proactive emotional management (taking initiative before problems arise) and reactive responses
• How unresolved trauma from childhood affects relationships, parenting, and self-worth
• The importance of creating personal mantras and affirmations to build self-love
• Ways to build supportive environments with people who validate rather than dismiss emotions
• Finding safer spaces and creating communities that support emotional health

I challenge all men listening to reach out to a friend this week and ask "How's your heart doing lately?" and just listen. Remember to share this episode and tag @letstalkaboutitpod if it resonates with you. If nobody told you today, I love you.



Support the show

Speaker 1:

Thank you. Welcome back, guys, to another great episode of let's Talk About it. For those that are new and do not know me, I am your host, ruki, and today we're talking about the acknowledgement of Men's Mental Health Month. If another man tells me I don't do emotions, I might just flip the whole taco table over. Baby, listen, fellas. You are human, your emotions matter, and it's very important to understand that you are not alone. I am here with you, and happy men's mental health month.

Speaker 1:

First, I would like to touch bases on the silent struggle. I want to cover a few stats. The first stat that I would like to cover is men are 3.9 times more likely to die by suicide than women in the US. Two many men suffer in silence due to stigma, toxic masculinity and a fear of appearing weak. And when we speak on the fear of appearing weak, we talk about how it's important that men aren't forced to feel as though their value lies with them having intimacy. Without that, it makes them less of a man. That's something that's pretty tough, I would say, because it falls in line with forcing you to operate under a realm that you may not understand. Society teaches men to suppress their emotions by saying man up, don't cry. Be strong. Just ignore the emotion in its entirety, understanding that some of you all grew up in survival and not self-care. It's very important that society stop by making it normal for men to suppress their emotions. Suppressing your emotions can cause you to be responsive and not proactive. Stay with me now.

Speaker 1:

Being proactive means that you are willing to take initiative. You intensify situations, challenges or needs before they happen and act early to manage them. I'll give a few examples. You may plan your meals for the week to avoid unhealthy eating or set boundaries in relationships before things get uncomfortable, or save money for emergencies before one actually hits. You check in with a friend who seems off instead of waiting until they break down. Just choosing to act ahead of time right Versus being responsive, waiting until something happens and then react to it. It's not necessarily always negative, but some situations do require a calm and thoughtful response, but it often means you're letting circumstances dictate your actions. Stay with me. Example you only address your health issues when you feel pain or get sick. You only apologize after an argument instead of discussing feelings before it starts to boil over. You fix a financial problem only after your account is overdrawn. Think of it this way I'm reacting to what just happened.

Speaker 1:

I would like to cover a few key differences to help us get better with being proactive, since we have been taught to be reactive. As far as timing, make sure when you're being proactive before something happens. When it comes to your mindset, prepare, be intentional and be preventative. And when it comes to control, you're driving the situation, so stay high. You want to avoid being responsive. When it comes to timing, don't wait till after something happens. And as far as your mindset, you don't want to be reactive, adaptable or corrective. And as far as control, avoid responding to the situation In real life.

Speaker 1:

Proactive energy builds peace, power and progress. Responsive energy can be helpful in crisis, but over time, it can lead to burnout or feeling behind, and this is exactly why I would like to ask for society to allow men to be more proactive and less reactive so they can embrace their proactive energy as opposed to their responsive energy. Fellas, you do not have to suppress those emotions. You can let those emotions out. It is okay to talk to someone. It is okay to get self-care, it is completely okay. You know it's time to outgrow the survival mode and just love on you a little bit, you know, set those boundaries in place to keep you safe and those environments that tend to your emotional intellect, to where you're trying to go.

Speaker 1:

I want to talk a little bit about generational baggage and emotional starvation. I understand that some of you all didn't grow up hearing I'm Proud of you just a nod or a clap on the back, and now you're out here not knowing how to love or be loved. Some of you all did grow up hearing I'm Proud of you just a nod or a clap on the back, and now you're out here not knowing how to love or be loved. All of this causes unresolved trauma which leaks into relationships, parenting and self-worth. We're going to take a moment to talk about the importance of giving yourself the affirmations and healing that younger boy inside of you and healing that younger boy inside of you so you can learn how to regulate those emotions and accept your emotions and be proactive towards your emotions. I will say that take time every day, if you haven't already, to get up and create you a mantra and create you a set of affirmations that will build your self-worth, that will build your love for yourself, that will build the I'm proud of you moment. Create those mantras. Build your mind.

Speaker 1:

Mental health is not one-sided. It's just not about the trauma and the lows of the women in the day-to-day lives that they live, being single mothers and widows and etc. You guys matter as well, because there are men out here that are putting themselves last time after time after time, because they just want the validation of the woman and the love they did not receive. So I'm here for you, fellas. I'm here for you. Understand this. Healing isn't soft, it's survival. So look at it this way. Healing doesn't make you weak, it makes you dangerous in the best way. A man who knows himself can't be broken by the world. It's important for you to take a look, step back, reflect on your day, do some journaling, meditate, take a walk, do some grounding, engage in some mentorship. Change your environments, change the rooms that you surround yourself with.

Speaker 1:

Don't hang around men that show lack of, you know, self-awareness and they don't want their mental health to be the best that it can be, because that's not where you're going. They're not going to understand you. That support actually looks like. The support, whether it's from friends or women or family, is they need to really understand. Stop calling it crazy when a man finally opens up, they're not crazy. And it's not crazy. Nobody calling you crazy. When you finally open up and you become vulnerable enough to you know, be in the space to want to talk about your emotions, you want your emotions and feelings to be validated. That man wants the same.

Speaker 1:

So, men, I need you to remind yourself this when you're in these environments and you're working on your mental health if the people around you, your peers around you, the woman around you, the friends I already said peers, but the friends, peers, all of that around you does not sound like this, I see you. How can I support you? You don't have to carry it all today. Then you need to rebuild your circle. You need to find safer spaces to be in. You need to recreate a new family so you can have healthier family dinners. Make your own community if you have to.

Speaker 1:

With that being said, I have a message to the men, all of the male listeners that are listening today. I want you to understand this you are not your job, your income, your muscles or your mistakes. You're allowed to be full, a full human with feelings, fears and the right to heal. I want to take the time out and say an affirmation with you guys. I am more than what I've been through. I release shame, I choose peace and I deserve joy.

Speaker 1:

I challenge all of you men for the week that's listening, send me your friend and ask how's your heart doing lately and just hear them out. That's it, that's all. Make sure you remind them to shut the episode and tag let's Talk About it, pod. Understand that healing is hot, vulnerability is powerful and tacos well, they're always the answer. You know. That's it for today's episode covering Men's Mental Health Month. If this spoke to you in any way, share it with a friend. Post it on your story. Don't forget to tag us and let's talk about it, pod. Let's keep this conversation going. And if nobody told you today, I love you. Thank you.