Discovering My Purpose

Finding your purpose isn't a pre-existing cosmic treasure waiting to be discovered; it is an active, ongoing process of choosing what to care about. You build it by aligning your natural strengths with activities that energize you and causes that allow you to contribute value to others.

• Audit Your Strengths and "Flow"
• What makes you cry tears of joy
• Shift Your Focus to Service
• Create and Refine

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:03

Let's sit and converse.

SPEAKER_02 0:05

Let's talk about Welcome back, welcome back.

SPEAKER_03 0:16

We back. Yes, sir. Welcome to another episode of Sit and Converse. And before we dig down into our conversation today, make sure you like, share, subscribe, tell a friend to tell a friend that your favorite two-piece in the biscuit. In the biscuit is not on live. Mr. Crib, Mr. DJ, what's going on, my brother? How's life been treated?

SPEAKER_05 0:40

It's everything. That's how life is treating me. Everything is everything. Life is life. Hey, in a good way. In a good ways. What's been one of your uh positives for this week, brother? One of your wins earlier. Wins earlier? Hey, the Lord still got me here. That means I still have purpose.

SPEAKER_03 0:55

I totally understand that. Yeah, I just got back from watching my daughter with this thing called the Meet the Author. Uh-oh. So all the third graders had her create their own book, illustrated and everything. And then they did this display in the room where you got to meet the author. So that was a fun event. That was a great fun event. So she she was really, really enjoying herself and showing her abilities.

SPEAKER_05 1:19

That sounds great. I know we're going to have some future bestsellers on the New York Times coming out of that, out of that group. Talk about it. Talk about it.

SPEAKER_03 1:28

Well, you know, I think that's a great thing that they're doing at that school for the simple fact that's exposing them to so many different things. Yeah. Many people think you either got to kick a ball, hit a ball, uh do specific things, but being authors, illustrators, because they they also do like this art show as well, too, where they present their art. So it's it's been cool. I think it's it's helping them find their purpose. Hey, that's what that's what we need to do while we're here. Yep. Purpose. So going straight into a little topic, have you discovered your purpose?

SPEAKER_05 2:03

Have you? Put it in the chat if you have. If you have not found your purpose, still put it in the chat. Because we want to know. Have you found your purpose? Or discovered your purpose?

SPEAKER_03 2:14

So, Crib, let's dive on into this, man. Yes. What is what is purpose? You know, we hear we hear these words around, you hear uh social media tags, you see commercials, advertisements, yeah. Uh great book, now discover your purpose. But let's let's start off with purpose.

SPEAKER_01 2:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:36

In your own words, or if you want to be deep, what is the Webster dictionary of purpose?

SPEAKER_05 2:44

Uh I ain't gonna be deep.

SPEAKER_03 2:47

So give give us the Carlina definition.

SPEAKER_05 2:51

Well, you know, uh, Crib, you know, a lot of times um I've seen people try to um match their purpose uh with their job or with the or what they went to school for, or either what their parents or someone put on them. And a lot of times that really doesn't happen that way. Uh it's very rare that you know you you do wind up going to school or for or for your purpose, and that's what your purpose purpose is. But I think um most of the time we really don't find out what our purpose is to a few years or sometimes well after the time we graduate from high school.

SPEAKER_03 3:33

Yeah. Yeah, in college. Because I uh like I like to let people know, you know, your purpose is not always clear. Yep. And that's okay. It is okay. And I think a lot of people put a lot of uh pressure on themselves, especially when you start seeing people move.

SPEAKER_01 3:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:50

And you're sitting there like, what is my purpose? Why, what am I? You begin to ask those questions, why am I here? Yeah, exactly. What am I supposed to be doing? What is my purpose? And with it not being clear doesn't mean that you're not doing what you're supposed to do. It's a point of the clarity just hasn't came up and smacked you upside the head yet.

SPEAKER_05 4:08

Absolutely. And you should not let someone pressure you into something to tell them this is your purpose, because nobody knows what your purpose is. The only person who can really release what your purpose is is God. See, you're about to make the church folks mad.

SPEAKER_03 4:24

Oh, wow. Because you know, they always run over there at a children's church. You're gonna be a preacher. You're gonna do this, you gonna do that. That's your that's the purpose why you're here. But like I think it comes with, you know, with your purpose. It's not always, it don't always show up, but you end up finding your purpose through failures and trials and tribulations, and then you realize, oh, that's why I'm here. This is what I was supposed to be helping with.

SPEAKER_05 4:52

Craig, you just said something very powerful with that. Well, the several things just uh announced, I mean, um mentioned out of that. Failure. Yeah. Failure is never a bad thing. Failure is a learning experience. And yes, you're gonna fail at something as long as you live in this earth. And and and to discover your purpose, you're gonna fail, you you're gonna fail along the way to really decide uh to fill out, figure out what your purpose is.

SPEAKER_03 5:22

Yeah, because I think if you you know, piggybacking off the failure piece, I think if you don't fail, you're not you're not growing. Our growing moments come in the failure moments.

SPEAKER_04 5:35

Yes, it surely does.

SPEAKER_03 5:37

Because if you if you just automatically do it, you know, you I'm a big sports guy, we were talking about, I ain't even gonna talk about the game we're talking about, because I don't want to talk about it. But if you're good at what you're doing, it comes so easy to you that you don't know what the growing edge is. If it just comes naturally.

SPEAKER_04 5:58

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 5:58

You know, people that naturally sing real great, let me rephrase that. People that sing. Because you know, you got people that sing, and then you got people that can just flat out sing. And we know all in our lifetime done heard somebody that can flat out sing. And it's so effortless to them.

SPEAKER_05 6:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:17

So, you know, it's hard for them to learn additional techniques or different additional styles because it just comes to them.

SPEAKER_04 6:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 6:26

So, but now if they get in a genre that that's hard for them, then they like you going back to your failure piece. Yeah. They can fail, and now they can begin to, okay, I don't need to do this part again. I I can do it this way instead of that way. But if you ain't never failing, you ain't never growing.

SPEAKER_05 6:42

Ooh. You thought the church people are gonna be mad at me. They might be mad at you too. We don't got nothing but space and opportunity.

SPEAKER_03 6:52

But space and opportunity.

SPEAKER_05 6:55

You better watch out for Dick and Leroy. He's coming around that corner after you.

SPEAKER_03 7:00

Yeah, he might tell me to get out of his spot because his purpose is to be there first, to park in his spot. But I think too, going back, you know, all jokes aside, I think going back to, you know, people who's putting the pressure on them about discovering their purposes, it's because of social media. Because you look at social media, and if you don't have a discernment with social media, social media will have you thinking everybody got everything figured out, and life is 110%, and they operating in their purpose, and their purpose is booming. And if you start comparing their best self to your worst self, then you end up beating up yourself. Wow. Because you we can also look at social media and be like, oh, they got it made. But that social media you can be whoever you want to be. Absolutely. At that time, at that day, and with the use of AI, if I want to be six foot six, 120 pounds, I can say, AI, take this image and shed 30 pounds on it, put me on here, then I can put it on Facebook and look a certain way.

SPEAKER_05 8:10

Exactly. Because what most people fail to realize, by the time you put your clip or whatever on social media, you don't filter everything, you know, edit edit everything to look the way that you want it. Again, people don't know what we go through to put this show together.

SPEAKER_03 8:28

Right, right.

SPEAKER_05 8:29

They don't see the behind the scenes, the late nights, the sipping we have to do to make sure I throw, say, uh uh quench and whatnot. It's a lot of work that goes in this to uh sip and converse.

SPEAKER_03 8:42

And for me, you know, when we going back to purpose as a man, I didn't know my purpose came in seasons. So each season gave me uh a new purpose, whether it was protection of my family, whether the finance side of my family, whether it's the spiritual side, each one of those seasons opened a new doorway or new uh opportunity to know that okay, my purpose here in I have a life purpose. Then here in my household, I got this purpose right here as well, which is one of those things that the life purpose and the finance purpose may be two separate purposes. Absolutely, but they still coexist to make you the whole your whole purpose, if that makes sense. That sounds like some Jess Jackson stuff there. I'm sorry. Rest in peace, Mr. Jesse Jackson. But damn dumb right there just threw me off myself.

SPEAKER_05 9:45

But but look, man, I mean, I like how you broke that down in seasons because also the what you didn't mention, but I know it's still in your heart. When your daughter came, that was another season of purpose. That was another season. That purpose became provider. Exactly. Even as you know, as your parents took care of you, but as your parents age, then you become their provider, right? A caretaker. So that's another season.

SPEAKER_03 10:13

And then, you know, and piggybacking off that, during that time, not only did you have to learn to not just take care of yourself, then you have a child. Now you're learning to take care of a child. Now, when you got to help with your parents, now that's another learning season.

SPEAKER_04 10:29

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 10:30

To how how do I support and take care of my parents? And then, you know, of course, like with our podcast, we we are in the building season.

SPEAKER_04 10:39

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 10:39

So our purpose right now with Sip and Converse is continually to grow and build and get our likes, shares, and subscribe up. I'm talking to y'all. While you're listening now, just go ahead and take quick one, two seconds and hit the like button and hit the subscribe.

SPEAKER_04 10:54

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 10:55

But it's a building season that we all go through as well. And um, and for those who are still not kind of clear what they should direction need to go to to um to define out what the define or what their purpose is, what I learned along the way, and I and I still share with people is find someone who's doing going doing something positive that's legal. Because you can be doing something positive that's illegal and you don't want to find find that purpose, but find something that's positive and legal that someone is going in a direction like, hey, I might want to get around these these group of people or this person to see what they're doing or how they're discovering their purpose, or what purpose are they living? And maybe I might find something that that's gonna help me discover my purpose, or the purpose that they live in might be the purpose that fits me.

SPEAKER_03 11:52

And why and coming following DJ up with that while y'all thinking about that? I want you to think about this for me. Um proposing a question, Crib, you can answer as well. What's the time in your life you thought you was on the right path? And then it changed.

SPEAKER_05 12:09

What was the time in my life I thought I was on the right path?

SPEAKER_03 12:11

That you thought you were on the right path, and then all of a sudden it changed. Because you just knew this is my purpose, this is what I supposed to be doing, and you start doing it, and then it changed in the middle of it.

SPEAKER_05 12:31

When I first started my my company, my first company that I have now for over 26 years, um, Big Ben, when I first started the company, my cousin and I we started, and we was started doing filming. And with filming back in the time in the in the late 90s, uh, anytime you did a film, you always, uh movies, they always came with you know great soundtracks to help, that helps boost your movie. And so I was doing both of them, and when I was in the middle of this, I'm like, hey, man, I done found my purpose. The film industry, the music industry. And then somewhere along the way, about maybe four or five years in, I realized this is not my purpose, but I'm in the right arena into branding and marketing and discovering, helping other people achieve their brand and marketing goals. And so during that fifth or sixth year, I transitioned the company into what the purpose that I discovered along the way. And it wasn't no longer doing movies or in the music industry, but it was still doing something in that arena that helped me uh define the purpose that I think I was born to do for this particular company.

SPEAKER_03 13:55

And see, that that that makes sense. Because you felt you step right into the next point I was gonna make is that your purpose is never found standing still. So you gotta be moving. So if you weren't out there doing the videos and making the soundtracks, you would have never stepped into or discovered the real purpose behind, we could say, step one of purpose.

SPEAKER_05 14:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:21

Because most people think the purpose is gonna come up and just smack them.

SPEAKER_05 14:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:24

No, you gotta get to moving and the purpose will become clear.

SPEAKER_05 14:30

Yes. And I wasn't one of those, I got the money and just calling the shots. Uh, people just worked for me. I I was hands-on uh doing the movies, uh doing the music. I, you know, I rolled cables. Uh I was behind the camera.

SPEAKER_03 14:46

You run around with the OVHS camera with a man, what?

SPEAKER_05 14:51

Well, we by that time they had we had the many uh many tapes then. So yes, but whatever it took to um to pull the project off, I did it. It wasn't like um I'm paying as money I need for you to do all of that. That that wasn't my mentality. Whatever needed, whatever it took to get the job done, I was one of those that was done.

SPEAKER_03 15:10

Speaking of them little men and VHSs, I know a lot of people in a lot of glad they VHS is messed up. What you say? Was that supposed to be my purpose? So you you glad the videos don't work no more.

SPEAKER_01 15:30

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 15:31

But you know, most people gotta like discovering your purpose, you gotta either choose a path or versus standing still. Yeah, it goes back to what we were saying. You were doing something, and I think that's that's key for anybody. If you're trying to discover that purpose, start doing something, and that purpose will come out.

SPEAKER_04 15:48

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_03 15:48

Because I bet people you go to all these various seminars and they say write down your 10, 15 steps, your 20 ideas. But that's cool. But at some point you got to start doing something, not just writing it all down on paper. Other than that, you just got a nice notebook.

SPEAKER_05 16:06

Exactly. Because uh what we all gonna have to realize when that day comes, our legacy is gonna reflect our purpose. What are they gonna say about you at your home going? Are they gonna have to make something up? Or are they truly gonna uh talk about your purpose while you were here?

SPEAKER_03 16:32

And and the impact that you got. But I think people also, Crib, they freeze. People freeze because they're afraid of making the wrong decision. True. Or choosing the wrong purpose, so they do nothing at all. And at that point in time, doing something goes back to our failure.

SPEAKER_05 16:51

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 16:52

Doing the wrong thing is better than not doing anything at all.

SPEAKER_05 16:55

Exactly. Because most people don't even know what it takes to do whatever you're doing anyway, because what again, what you just going back to what you said before, they're just being still not doing anything. So they don't know if it's right or wrong. And then they'll go and Google something and think Google's always right. Google don't know.

SPEAKER_03 17:14

Oh, and speaking of that, you can turn around and say, you could, especially my chat people. You the chat will give you an answer. And if you disagree with the answer and you want to know if it's wrong or not, just tell chat, I don't think this is the right answer. And chat gonna come back and say, you know what? It ain't the right answer. I didn't know that. Oh, yeah. But you gotta question chat. Be like, I don't think this is the right answer. And then it's it's gonna come back to you. Okay, okay. And they tell you that. But I think too, you know, people shooting to be perfect in their purpose, but it uh, I don't want to say that. Say it. This is this is sip and converse. Yeah, I need to ask chat. Nah, but uh, you know, progress beats breeds perfection.

SPEAKER_04 18:07

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 18:07

That's why I was saying, you know, just writing them down on a sheet of paper and never going out attempting any of it. That's the you you're stuck. Yeah. Your life is passing you by at that time because you're afraid of choosing that wrong path, and you end up, unfortunately, not doing anything at all. And I rather live a life of failures than a life of regrets.

SPEAKER_05 18:28

Yeah. And the key point was you just mentioned progress. We can sit on the couch all day or sit behind a computer and say, I'ma start this business, I'm gonna start this, I'm gonna start that. And come January to December. You never did anything. You still ain't started. You still ain't starting, you're still there.

SPEAKER_03 18:48

But in your mind and in your social media posts, you launching a business. You got you got the best post ever, you got the best updates ever, but you haven't taken that next step to actually go out and attempt it. To even find out if you like it.

SPEAKER_05 19:03

Exactly. But you seriously critiquing what somebody else is doing about this is perfect, this ain't perfect. They should have done this instead of doing this way.

SPEAKER_03 19:14

If I did it, I would do it this way. Exactly. But then you won't even go do it. At least they got out there to do it. Exactly. But it it it's just amazing to me that when you think about that purpose and you find your purpose, it's like a I don't want to call it a fairy tale. Things just click. Yeah, you feel so good when you realize aha, this is what I'm here to do. Because it doesn't feel like work at that point in time.

SPEAKER_05 19:43

It never does. It never does. And um the satisfaction that you get, man, what you I think you're trying to say. Satisfaction. The satisfaction that you get, man, is like um it just feels like you just completed um a project that you've been working on for a long time. And when you completed that project, you sit back and like, I can take a deep breath and breathe. That's how that's how I feel when you you know you discover a purpose that you think you what's you what you think you was uh born to do.

SPEAKER_03 20:18

And too, you wake, you begin to wake up with an excitement.

SPEAKER_05 20:22

Yep, yep.

SPEAKER_03 20:24

That's not manufactured.

SPEAKER_05 20:25

No.

SPEAKER_03 20:26

You know, I admit I someone I'm gonna woke up and be like, ooh, I'm so happy to be up this morning. Time to get busy. And I'm going to a W-2. And it was so fake. But when I get to wake up and I know I'm gonna film a podcast that day, or I got some coaching clients that day, or something that uh that's my purpose. Yeah, when you wake up, you got not only are you thanking God that you woke up, but you got a pimp in your step because you know I get I get to do this. Not that I have to do this. Yes. Because if you think about it, and you're no sure listeners, most of the time when you get up to go to work, what you say, I have to go to work today. But when it's time to go on a vacation, you don't say I have to go on vacation. You're like, I get to go on vacation today. It's about to be on the your energy level change. And at that moment in time, that short-lived purpose is the vacation. Yeah, so your energy level changed towards that vacation. So, my listeners, why I got a question for y'all that y'all tuning in. So get in the chat. If you're listening on Bud Sprout, write it down. My question for you this week what are you stuck at? What are you stuck now? Or where are you stuck? I'll put it that way. Where are you stuck? Where are you stuck? Put in the chat. Where are you stuck? Because it starts with knowing where you are and taking accountability for I know I'm Stuck. What do I need to do? And uh follow back up with that as we get ready to round this this session up. Yeah. What's one move you can do this week? What's one move you can make this week to help discover your purpose?

SPEAKER_05 22:19

Or to enhance your purpose if you already discover your purpose. Talk about it. Enhance your purpose. Yes. If if if you're already discovering your purpose and you're um actively doing it right now, things that you can do to enhance your purpose. You can um read read a book on it or listen to an audio book.

SPEAKER_03 22:43

Or listen to our podcast about purpose.

SPEAKER_05 22:46

Of course, listen to our podcast. Or you can watch a YouTube on somebody who's working it, uh doing something the same purpose that you're doing. Or get some coaching on what you're doing to enhance your purpose. There's several things out there you can continue to do to enhance your purpose of what you're doing.

SPEAKER_03 23:05

And since we all tend to love ChatGBT, Gemini, Gronk, all those particular AI engines, ask powerful questions in the AI. Be like, hey chat, this is my purpose. What is one thing, suggestion you make that you can make to help me increase or get more eyes on or fine-tune my purpose?

SPEAKER_04 23:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 23:30

And what that'll tell you to do is give you some suggestions if you feel like you're stuck in rebranding or getting yourself going or making sure you're in the right thing. But most importantly, as always, pray. Please do that. Pray. And I pray that you hit that like button, that share button, and that subscribe button. Subscribe. So you can come into the next episode of sip and converse. And like I said, put in the chat what's your purpose and what if you're trying to locate your purpose? Hit us up. We'll help you. We love to communicate with you in the chat and whatever else we might do. Crib you got any final words? I'm good, man. That was a great talk. Yes, it was. And with that, peace out. Peace.

SPEAKER_00 24:18

Let's step in converse.

SPEAKER_02 24:20

Let's talk about that.