Fast Brained Women
The podcast for women with ADHD, by women with ADHD.
Hosts Dani and Lorna chat with everyday legends about the real-life highs, lows, and WTFs of ADHD.
Expect connection, insight, and hope – plus zero shame, lots of laughs, and the reminder that you’re not alone.
👉 Follow @FastBrainedWomen and join the community.
Fast Brained Women
Could this be a career limiting podcast? Welcome to Fast Brained Women
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Two women with ADHD explore their experiences of late diagnosis, workplace challenges, and finding community in a world designed for neurotypical minds.
• Dani and Lorna introduce the Fast Brained Women Podcast for women with ADHD by women with ADHD
• Both hosts received their diagnoses around age 30 after years of being labelled with depression and anxiety
• Exploring how masking as neurotypical takes a toll on mental health
• Career impacts of undiagnosed ADHD, including multiple redundancies and job changes
• The inconsistency of ADHD symptoms makes explaining them to others particularly challenging
• Social media's role in providing validation and community through relatable content
• Reframing ADHD from a "disorder" to recognising how these traits would have been valuable in ancestral times
• The importance of community as the ultimate resource for managing ADHD
Subscribe and join us for upcoming episodes featuring diverse women sharing their ADHD experiences.
Follow us on social @fastbrainedwomen and try Endel : http://endel.io/fastbrains
Welcome to Fast Brain Podcast
Speaker 1Isn't it ironic that the person that you are recording a podcast with on ADHD is late ? Oh , she's in the building . Hold the phone . So welcome to the Fast Brain Podcast . This is a podcast for women with ADHD by two women with ADHD . So expect chaos , expect interruption , expect us forgetting what we started talking about in the first place . We're human , we're doing it . That's pretty much the main thing , and we really hope , along the way , that you get to find some relatable , inspirational , anecdotal stories for your general everyday life . My name's Dani . I am a coach , a health and wellbeing coach . I'm also the founder of a community called Fast Brain Women , and that's why we're here , because in that process , lorna decided it would be a great idea to put something else on our to-do list and we've actually done it . We're here , lorna , please .
Speaker 2How did this happen ? We're just not busy enough . I decided , ouch , so how are we here ? Well , you started something beautiful . You started to bring together some women who you knew were looking for some community , looking to connect with people like them , and I fell into your trap , trap , my cult . And then , yeah , you know , we . I listened to a lot of podcasts and I'm like , why not , let's do it , let's bring people together and talk about things that matter to us so we're from the same little hometown .
Speaker 1How did you end up here in Dubai ?
Speaker 2I just wanted to get out of my . I just wanted to get out of the UK , not my hometown specifically , I've got some love for Bolton . I have to say , um , yeah , I was looking for anywhere that spoke English , because I don't have languages as a superpower . So , um , the UAE was the first place that sort of opened up the doors to me , and I've been here for 13 years now , I think you've been here . We didn't know each other before . I think that's important to state . We've met ?
Speaker 1yeah , we met . We worked this out the other day , didn't we worked ? We met at a networking event right before covid yes , like literally on the cusp of everything being locked down , and , of course , we got on like house on fire . That was always gonna happen immediately connected on linkedin yes , and all the magic happened but that's how we figured out . We started at the weekend actually your birthday party and I was like , oh , someone asked us how do you know each other ?
Speaker 2we just looked to each other and we went scroll through the LinkedIn notifications you've always been around , um , but no , yeah , I met you on my maternity leave . Actually , I was going to a networking event at the time and you were there and we did some sort of treasure hunt and that was it , yeah .
Speaker 1I remember that now . No , I think a lot of time in a place like this , when you're far from home , you just migrate towards like minded people . I think the universe has a way , there's a magnetism of bringing us together , so I'm pretty grateful for that .
Speaker 2So what's your vision for this podcast bringing ?
Speaker 1us together
Finding Each Other in Dubai
Speaker 1, so I'm pretty grateful for that . So what's your vision for this podcast ? I really just think there is a space for conversation , a space for helping women who have probably found out that they have ADHD , or are , my new term , adhd curious later in life , right ? So a lot of women who are in the fast brain community group the majority have found out post 30 years old that this is the way that their brain works . I was diagnosed when I was 30 , something Can't remember exactly . Um , it made a lot of things make sense , yeah , and you know there's a lot of rawness around it , because I was I really flip-flopped between being diagnosed with , like depression and anxiety , and you know , it just never felt . You know , yes , I was , I wasn't sad , I wasn't depressed , I was overwhelmed , I was exhausted , I wasn't coping , I wasn't doing okay , but those labels , diagnoses , observations from medical professionals just never really seemed to make sense to me . And then , when finally I did come across the concept of ADHD , it literally just my whole life was like everything . Everything made sense .
Speaker 2And I think that's so important to notice as well , because so many people go oh , adhd , what a wonderful superpower and , like I hate that term .
Speaker 2I mean , I'm sure we'll get to the point where we will discuss all the beautiful and brilliant things about it , but , like with everything , there's a real downside and inability to do certain things . But also the prevalence of mental health issues in the ADHD community , and particularly among women , who are going longer without diagnosis , are dealing with stigma and judgment and masking to a degree that people who've had that ability to self reflect and understand where it's coming from before , you know , they've just had a longer journey to it . So I think we'll probably find as we go through this journey because I'm really excited to meet lots of different women from this region , um , and hear lots of different voices , but I'm sure we'll see a prevalence . You know , my journey was very similar anxiety , depression , um , you know , there's a correlation there , whether that's biological or because of the way society treats people with adhd .
Speaker 1It's it's not a clear line , it's a bit of both , I think yeah , I think masquerading as a neurotypical person for 30 odd years is it's
Late Diagnosis and Mental Health
Speaker 1gonna do that to you it's really hard work but I , like mine , became very tangible .
Speaker 1I've been made redundant , I want to say , like six times . I think it's pretty impressive , like you know first time devastating . Second time , stung . Third time , uh , four times . Am I just good at losing my job ? It's just something that I do . Barely stayed in a job longer than yeah , I think the longest job I had was three years , but I actually had two children , so I had two maternity leaves and also , you can't really leave a job while you're pregnant . Anyway , I had to do a lot of apologizing after that long tenure three years to the people I worked with as well , one because I was pregnant too , because I think at that point I was just not a great person to work for , um , so a lot of those things you start to take personally , and we all know that's the rejection sensitivity that comes with also having a fast brain is real and without context , you feel flawed , broken , not able , not enough , stupid , like you know , insert derogatory words here um , and that's that's the real dark side of it . That's something that I'm not willing to go back to .
Speaker 2Yeah , definitely . It's like you know you are , hopefully , you know you're so good at so many things and you can see your strengths , but then the things that other people find easy are so hard . And that's that word stupid , you know , has haunted me throughout the years as well . You know I'm intelligent , got the scores , got emotional intelligence , I believe , but then you do stupid things like you know you intelligence , I believe . But then you do stupid things like you know , get your child in the back of the car , not saying I do that , especially not in hot cars but , um , you know , we've all made mistakes yeah , a few .
Speaker 1Like I do have a reputation for thinking that I've booked flights there should be a whole episode on airport misadventures . I swear that just doesn't go down well anymore .
Speaker 2I think again yeah nobody trusts me with that stuff there's a skepticism , then that comes along with it .
Speaker 1I think people do start to um trust you less , I don't know , and I think this is why it's just so important to have that awareness and really then start to connect authentically with who you are , so you can then better communicate it to the people around you , who you are . So you can then better communicate it to the people around you , like you know , helping your friends to understand that you're not doing this on purpose , you're not not replying to them on purpose , or you know forgetting something or saying something inappropriate , or you know not listening or whatever . Again , insert myriad of nonsense here and that advocacy almost like how do you find describing helping people around you to , yeah , better understand what your lived experience looks like ?
Speaker 2I think the biggest challenge for me in all of this is being able to explain it to the people who do need to rely on me , whether that's my husband , work , etc . Because nothing you can say about ADHD is ever constant . Are you focused ? Are you unfocused ? Can you project manage ? Yeah , I can really project manage very well .
Speaker 2Um , and then other days not so much like , yeah , just shaking things in a bag and see what happens . Um , nothing is consistent . You know I can keep track of my belongings . Other days I'll lose absolutely everything . So I think that's the the most confusing part is nothing about . It is . Every day I'm dealing with the same struggles . It's a new and exciting bag of struggles every day . You just don't know what you're going to wake up to .
Speaker 1I feel like we need to like frame that as , like I don't know your demotivational quote here , she is everybody
Living with ADHD Inconsistencies
Speaker 1, but we'll just send that out before you go into a room or any kind of like scenarios like this is what you're gonna get .
Speaker 2Yeah , my husband's like I don't know which version of you I'm gonna wake up to each day . I'm like that's what keeps us interested .
Speaker 1You know how do but how do people like really receive it ? I know that if you've got that kind of good relationship at work with friends , you know humor can really help . There's a lot of memes get shared . I think there's a lot of definite like social media posts of and unfortunately , I think the algorithm now serves like my husband , a lot of ADHD content because he has me and my son to to deal with and that , I think , helps where he's like oh , this is you , this is you , this is you .
Speaker 2I mean let's talk about that for a second , because the whole Instagram TikTok gets a lot of slamming for self-diagnosis , but I'm not sure there's anything else that made has made me feel quite seen as what I've seen on social media and you have to take it in with a pinch of salt and take what's useful and leave what's not and work with a doctor and a psychologist and all of those things . I'm not saying it's a replacement , but there is nothing more validating . You don't want to go to the nhs website and just see a list of symptoms and then you know it's just so dry . It's not like the lived experience of some of the sort of anecdotes you shared with me yeah , there's a lot of grimness on the , uh , the clinical side .
Speaker 1Clinical side and I do think social media and God bless the algorithm does feed you content . I know even within , like the fast brain women community , the the um , the sharing of memes , like . But there are just some that are so , so spot on and actually sometimes , when you don't have the words to really kind of communicate , or again that's something that you do that just feels so ludicrous to other people you can kind of just forward that and be like I'm not the only one .
Speaker 2Or things that you didn't even think were weird , and then someone makes a meme about it . You're like doesn't everyone do that ? And you're like no .
Speaker 1But real aha moments . What was on ? I shared with everyone the other week about um oversharing and that a lot of especially women with adhd overshare because they feel that that context will make them more digestible oh my god , we're in such danger .
Speaker 2Is this going to be a career limiting podcast for me ?
Speaker 1I think it might be okay so we've got quick fire questions , so we did want to get allegedly a spinny wheel , like we're at the fairground and we choose , choose the questions . However , we forgot , so I'm just going to ask you these questions . I want to see what your answers are . We'll
Community as the Ultimate Resource
Speaker 1get through them as quickly as possible .
Speaker 2To the point I'm going to take in turns , though it's not all about me , okay .
Speaker 1Tennis Question .
Speaker 2Tennis Paddle is my new new thing , like everybody else in Dubai , like everybody else Pickleball I would .
Speaker 1I think we need a wheel and like a stop stopwatch . I don't know . I feel like I want to like stop the clock .
Speaker 2I think that would be helpful . It would keep us on track . That is such a great tip . Have you got one of those focus clocks ? Anyway , we're already going on a tangent .
Speaker 1Right , we need a clock for next one . Okay , my first question is what is your funniest ADHD Whoopsie .
Speaker 2So I left a entire suitcase in Dubai when I was in Saudi Arabia and I needed those things because it wasn't just my belongings , it was also stuff for a workshop that I was supposed to be delivering that day .
Speaker 1Nice yeah . How did that feel ?
Speaker 2Absolutely humiliating . I was pretty new to the job and I was so embarrassed and realized that that was not a normal thing to do .
Speaker 1I feel we also need like a sound like whoopsie , like some kind of like home we can blow . Okay . Next question hey , my turn , your turn . Okay , here we go .
Speaker 2We knew the interrupting was gonna happen how has ADHD influenced what you do for work ?
Speaker 1so I'm now in the stage that I categorically know what I can't do for work , and at the moment , that is dealing with clients . Um , so very much . I think my work is now going to be in the community . But in my healing journey , figuring out who I am authentically , figuring out what my values are I know it's all about community . I know that this needs to be fun and , having healed myself and qualified as a coach 2017 , 2018 , I now I'm putting that into practice . And it used to be . I used to work in mental wellness with safe space . It was like big and broad . Now it's like laser focused . I'm like cutting away the nonsense and again understanding my ADHD , hyper-focusing on my ADHD women , and that's what I'm going to be doing now .
Speaker 2Long may that last . I hope so . That is a high hope .
Speaker 1I hope so . Is this going to like come back to haunt me and say oh , remember you said you were going to do that thing . Yes , I do . Okay , remember when I said I was going to do that thing , hold me accountable . Okay , body double .
Speaker 2All right , thank you , you got it , if I remember , take notes . Okay , give me your top ADHD resource or tool that has been a game changer okay , quick fire , I will say community , connecting to other women who are experiencing similar struggles , journeys , and that's why I'm so excited about this podcast to meet people similar but different than me , where we can learn from each other and grow yeah , it's like the whole thing , the whole like mental health world , and it's always that kind of that very campaignable line .
Speaker 2It's like you're not alone it's so lonely when you first get diagnosed it's you know there is some individual work to be done , but the power of the , the group and the visibility is is such a gift , but that and that's the whole thing .
Speaker 1I think you can say something , you can tell someone you're not alone , but actually to make them feel that is a completely different thing . So community 101 I turn again .
Speaker 2Uh , what is an adhd myth , ad ? What is an adhd myth that you would like to debunk ?
Speaker 1So I think that I really hate the fact that the clinical side , so the fact that it's like a diagnosis
Debunking ADHD Myths and Closing
Speaker 1, it's a disorder , the D of ADHD . If we were with our ancestors back in cave times , we would have been so highly valued in our tribe , we would have been out there figuring out wheels , fire , we'd have been on high alert . We'd have been , you know , really the people holding together civilization because of our fast brains , so fast brains , adhd brains have always existed . However , the environment that we live in is completely different now . So , rather than being distracted and innovative and ideas and all of these things at once , we're expected to be on time and sit still and , you know , do all these other things .
Speaker 1And it's so innovative in a different way right which then is so addictive to that dopamine seeking part of our brain that we're almost like rigged to fail unless we really can figure this out .
Speaker 1Get on top of it , be aware of when we're falling into those traps , but also heavily advocate for the times when we know that the current day world is actually going to be working against us Again . Stupid things like being on time and sitting still , it's a construct . It is it very much is so . Yeah , that is something that I am very vocal about .
Speaker 2This isn't a disorder . Do you know what I don't hate ? The disorder word . Really vocal about this isn't a disorder . Do you know ?
Speaker 1I don't hate the disorder word really , yeah , um don't think it's like a negative negativity associated with that word .
Speaker 2I think disorder is such a good word , specifically for ADHD , because there's so much disorder , um , and I don't . Yeah , I want to move away from this sort of ableist . Like disability is bad , and I know that that is not what you're saying at all , but , yeah , I don't want to shun that because , especially , like you say , in the in the modern world that we're living in , in a society that is designed for neurotypical , cis , white men , etc . There's just so many things that we can do to to um , improve that world for everybody and create accessibility . But until we bring society up to speed , until we get back to our ancestry , um , I think it's important to acknowledge that we're a bit of a round peg in a square hole yeah , and that's funny , that's so .
Speaker 1This is essentially where the logo fast brain women came from , like the feeling of what it feels like to be that square peg trying to fit in something that is , yeah , expected , is rollercoastery , trippy , psychedelic , but I , I'm going to , I'm definitely going to take that concept of disorder , but I think .
Speaker 2I think it's going to be a hot topic as we go through this series . Everybody has an opinion . Some people will believe that it's a superpower , some people will believe it's a disability , some people believe that actually , with a majority , there's going to be so much , and I think that's what's really interesting about this . Nobody has the answers . Everything's a perception . We're all just trying to figure it out .
Speaker 1Yeah , so I'm really excited to find out who are the guests that are going to be coming on . So stay tuned and we will be joined by some amazing women from the middle east region who have adhd or adhd curious , and also maybe some experts . Shall we chuck that in along the way ?
Speaker 2absolutely okay , can't , can't just operate in an echo chamber , I think , yeah , we're looking forward to speak to people from all different backgrounds on the topic . Yeah , so what's your key reflection from today's discussion ? What's your little nugget ?
Speaker 1I'm gonna take away that concept of disorder , because I think I had just settled myself that it was and there was a very negative connotation to it . But you're right like we're living a disordered life , but that's not bad , just is , it just is yeah , yeah . What about you ?
Speaker 2I asked that question and don't have an answer ready . I'm just curious about you , dani , I think . I just want to say I'm really excited . I think we've got some great guests lined up , like you said , and the diversity of thought that's going to come is going to be really cool . No-transcript .
