Discipleship Fails When You Skip This | Allen & Stacy Jo

In this episode of Faithfully Invested, Allen and Stacy Jo delve into the essential elements of effective discipleship—heart posture, patience, presence, and ongoing commitment—highlighting how these qualities shape genuine spiritual multiplication and relationship. They emphasize that successful disciple-making begins with our own spiritual health and humility.

Key topics: 

• The importance of heart posture in discipleship and how it impacts connection
• Jesus as the ultimate model of humility, presence, and patience 
• The significance of presence over performance in mentoring relationships 
• The dangers of the expert trap and the importance of humility and vulnerability 
• Disciple-making as a long-term process requiring patience and perseverance 
• The necessity of availability, attentiveness, and authenticity 
• Guarding your own soul to continue pouring into others 
• Practical steps: approaching conversations with curiosity, slowing down expectations, and maintaining humility 
• The impact of genuine consistency and long-term commitment on spiritual growth

Timestamps: 00:00 - The significance of heart posture in discipleship
02:10 - Jesus’ example: prioritizing presence before mission
05:25 - Posture of the discipler influences whether truth is received
07:40 - Being intentional versus reactive in mentoring
09:15 - Modeling humility and genuine interest through Scripture
12:14 - The importance of proximity and doing life together
14:07 - Luke 6:40 and the significance of becoming like your teacher
15:26 - Authenticity, integrity, and the danger of faking it
17:12 - Avoiding the expert trap: walking alongside rather than lecturing
20:11 - The power of questions, curiosity, and meeting people where they are
22:00 - Patience as a core part of discipleship’s slow process
24:24 - The importance of grace and Holy Spirit’s work in sanctification
26:24 - The vital role of availability and being interruptible
28:34 - Considering calling and willingness before entering discipleship
31:47 - Practical step: listen with curiosity, slow down, and set realistic expectations
40:34 - The importance of self-care, spiritual health, and modeling Christ’s posture
42:18 - Prayer for humility, patience, and heart alignment in discipleship

Resources & Links:  

• Luke 6:40 
• Philippians 2:3-4 
• Ephesians 4:15

Connect with Allen & Stacy Jo:  Website - www.faithfullyinvested.com

Note: Remember, effective discipleship is rooted in humility, patience, and the willingness to show up consistently, reflecting Christ’s heart in every interaction.

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Transcript

Allen 0:00

Are you ready to build a life, business, and legacy that truly lasts? Welcome to Faithfully Invested with Alan and Stacy Joe Thorne, where faith meets real talk, biblical wisdom meets everyday life, and leadership meets laughter.

Stacy Jo 0:15

Together we will uncover God's blueprint for leadership, marriage, and mission, helping faith-driven leaders invest in what matters most.

Allen 0:23

Each episode we explore biblical wisdom, have real conversations, and of course, have some fun along the way. Because let's be real, walking in faith is an adventure.

Stacy Jo 0:34

It sure is. So pull up a seat, grab your coffee or your sweet tea, and join us as we steward our callings with intention. Because when we invest in his kingdom, he brings the increase. Okay.

Allen 0:57

Quick question.

Stacy Jo 0:58

Quick.

Allen 1:00

Have you ever tried to teach someone something? And about halfway through it, you realize that they had no idea what you were talking about. They were just doing the old shake, shake your head and smile thing. Right. Right. I think we've all been there. I'm happy to happy to hear that I'm not alone. But did you know that that the old shake your head and smile thing, it's it happens more more often in discipleship than we'd probably like to admit. Someone is seemingly pouring into someone else, and nothing is connecting. And most of the time the challenge is not the content, but it's it's our heart posture. Welcome to Faithfully Invested. I'm Alan.

Stacy Jo 1:57

And I'm Stacey Joe, and we are in season eight discussing discipling, discipling, and multiplying. And today we're jumping into episode two. You know, last week we discussed how you are already a discipler, whether you realize it or not, whether it's good, bad, or indifferent. And today we're gonna go a little deeper. So did you know that before you can multiply anything in someone else, you have to be aligned yourself with what is right and true?

SPEAKER_04 2:32

I didn't know that.

Stacy Jo 2:34

Because as you said, it's all about it's all about posture, the condition of our heart going into relationship, and it changes everything. So let's kick it off with something that is really easy to miss. You know, when we talk about discipleship, we're focused on the person being discipled. What are their needs? What are they struggling with? How can we help them grow? And these are great questions, absolutely. But we would suggest that the question that determines whether any of our spoken objective truth sticks is about the posture of the discipler. What is your posture going into this?

Allen 3:17

That's a great question. You know, what is your posture?

Stacy Jo 3:21

Yeah.

Allen 3:21

We got to consider our heart posture before we can ever expect to disciple anyone in anything.

SPEAKER_01 3:30

Right.

Allen 3:30

You know, uh uh and that holds true in discipleship as well as uh any any form of teaching.

SPEAKER_01 3:37

Right.

Allen 3:38

You know, mentorship.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

Yeah.

Allen 3:40

If we're trying to pass who we are and and what we've gained through Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, then we we have to do more than say that. We have to share that, we have to live that. And that's the whole point.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

Yeah.

Allen 3:55

So we can have the right content. We can have all the right scriptures, uh, we can have the life experience. But uh if your heart posture's off, then none of it's gonna land, right?

SPEAKER_01 4:08

Right.

Allen 4:09

Uh most people detect the fake. I can smell fake a mile away. And like I said, most people can. Uh they know the difference between when someone's trying to share light and life with them because they genuinely care, and when someone's only there to make themselves feel important. And I say, boy, howdy. I say I say the people can see it, they can hear it, and they can feel that difference. I say. I forget who that is, but that's uh Falkhorn Leghorn.

Stacy Jo 4:39

Falkhorn leghorn. The late great theologian. Yeah.

Allen 4:44

Immortalized in in the Looney Tune universe.

Stacy Jo 4:47

Oh my goodness. Anyhow, you know, but yes, you're absolutely right. They they certainly can smell fake, if you want to put it that way. Um so what do we mean by posture? And we're not talking about our body language. We're talking about our heart's posture concerning the relationship. Are you available or are you just occasionally accessible? Are you intentional or are you reactive? Are you in it for their growth or quietly in it for your own sense of purpose? And if these are uncomfortable questions, if these sting a little bit, then they are definitely the right questions that we should be asking ourselves.

Allen 5:31

Right. And the whole availability thing is I had a we had uh someone approach us about a discipleship program and hey, we'd like you to be a part of this. And I'm like, that that sounds awesome, man. But I knew uh that one, my schedule is too full currently, and I could not give them the time that that deserved.

SPEAKER_01 5:54

Yeah.

Allen 5:55

You know, and if uh I knew they would get 20% or less, and that's not what discipleship's about. We gotta get uh we gotta be able to provide a hundred percent of our time in that time, and it and it just wasn't possible. So you gotta you gotta know when to say no as well. Yeah. Um so but the uh the good news, there's always good news. Whenever whenever the Lord's involved, whenever uh Jesus Christ and uh and we're whenever we're uh working with them, whenever we're yielding to them, there's always good news. And the good news is that we can work on our posture. Uh posture's not a personality type, it's not a spiritual gift reserved for certain people. Uh it's a it's just a set of non-negotiable decisions. Um and I I'll give you I'll give you one guess on who modeled these decisions better than anyone else ever.

Stacy Jo 6:53

Well, I bet you're gonna say That's right.

Allen 6:59

Jesus. Jesus modeled heart posture better than I mean, he is the model for all things, the greatest teacher of all time. So imagine that if you will.

Stacy Jo 7:12

Yeah. As our pastor says, the answer is always Jesus.

Allen 7:16

The answer is always Jesus, right? Uh so speaking of Jesus, the the gospel of Mark, uh chapter three, uh verse fourteen, uh it says that that Jesus says that he appointed twelve so that they might be with him. With him, and he might send them out to preach. And I wonder if you caught that. I'm I'm gonna go through it again. He appointed twelve so that they might be with him and he might send them out to preach. So did you notice that the first purpose of calling the twelve was not to send them out, it was to have them with him. Jesus prioritized presence before mission, not maybe not over mission, but but you got to have presence. He was with them, uh, and they learned from him uh over time. I mean, he walked with them for three years. And he but so in this we see that he prioritized presence over mission. He prioritized being overdoing. Man, do we get caught up in that? The doing, the uh the whole all the things stuff. Uh he knew that he was what he was depositing in them. I mean, it couldn't be transferred through a lecture. Right. You know, and and he did speak to the masses, but he wasn't when he spoke with the twelve, he he did life with the twelve. Um, but it wasn't through just a lecture, it wasn't through the information. He it had to be caught through the proximity.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

Yeah.

Allen 8:57

He had to be caught because they were with them. As he was feeding into them, they were with him. They did life with him.

Stacy Jo 9:04

And it goes back, we've talked before about more is caught than taught.

Allen 9:08

More caught than taught, yeah, yeah.

Stacy Jo 9:10

And the challenge for most of us who want to disciple people is just that. You know, we jump straight into the sending.

SPEAKER_01 9:17

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 9:17

You know, we want to give them the information, we want to hand them the assignments, we want to get them moving, we want to get them out there. But Jesus said, come be with me first.

SPEAKER_01 9:27

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 9:27

He said, sit with me, watch me, eat with me, travel with me, right? Listen and learn from me, and let the way I live answer the questions you don't even know how to ask yet. That takes time, it takes patience, and it takes a willingness to be present without always having an agenda. Yeah. Which is hard for me. I want to always have an agenda. I want to know exactly what I'm doing, when I'm doing it. And that's just not the way Jesus taught us to be.

Allen 10:12

That's right everywhere. And and that was it was hard. You know, and that's but that's how they did things, and they traveled for miles and miles together. They did tough stuff together. And they they uh and they saw each other through those, right, through that, and that brought them even closer together.

SPEAKER_01 10:32

Yeah.

Allen 10:32

So uh they did tough stuff with Jesus.

Stacy Jo 10:35

Right.

Allen 10:36

So pretty cool.

Stacy Jo 10:37

So it is.

Allen 10:39

I like uh I mean we like what Mark says, and there there's nothing in the Gospels, any of the Gospels or the Epistles or or any part of the Word that doesn't stand true and isn't isn't good for teaching and and whatnot. But I I love what Luke has to say. Uh I I'm partial to John's gospel, but I like Luke too. But Luke says in chapter six, uh, verse 40, I I mean, Luke just he drops the gospel truth like a two-ton heavy thing here. And he he when he he says that the student is not above the teacher, but everyone who's fully trained will be like their teacher. And that ver that verse is truth. I mean, obviously it's truth, it's all truth, but it's it's uh both an encouragement and a warning. The encouragement is that discipleship, when it's done right, uh it works because people become like the ones who do life with them. And it's a warning because they're becoming like you. Uh not the best you, not the shiny you, but the real version of you, uh, which means that the posture that you carry in the discipleship, it matters more than what you may have initially considered. So it's definitely something to consider.

Stacy Jo 12:02

Yeah, that one does land a bit heavy. Um it means you cannot separate who you are from who you appear to be. Yeah. There's no fake allowed. You know, your patience, your integrity, the way you treat people, the way you handle conflict is all being absorbed by the people watching you. Which is why posture is this season's biggest starting point.

Allen 12:28

Yeah, yeah, you gotta it's a great point, uh, a great place to start from uh is a lot of people mess it.

Stacy Jo 12:34

Yeah.

Allen 12:34

Moving from uh the gospel of Luke, you can never go wrong with with Paul's epistles, and in Philippians uh chapter two, verses three and four, it it shows us how Paul talks about the posture that Jesus modeled uh when he says, Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, uh, but in humility, count others as more significant than yourselves. Look not only to your own interest, but to the interest of others. And that's the multiplier posture right there. Humility. Genuine interest in another person. Do you have it? Putting their growth ahead of your own comfort and convenience.

SPEAKER_04 13:22

It's simple to say, but it's a little challenging to live out.

Stacy Jo 13:28

Yeah. So let's talk about what actually gets in the way of this posture. Because if it were easy, everybody would be doing it, right? And the world would look a whole lot different if everybody was doing it.

Allen 13:40

Right. The first thing uh I think that we we gotta talk about is the expert trap. Uh when you've been walking with the Lord for a while, when when you've built something, or when you've when you've been through hard seasons and you come out on the other side, there's a temptation to come into discipleship relationships as the person who has all the answers. And that's not it.

Stacy Jo 14:07

Yeah.

Allen 14:08

That posture, that that know-it-all posture, that shuts people down quicker than uh almost anything else. Nobody wants to be talked at. People want to be walked with. And when I do a lot of teaching in the construction field as well, uh, and I I go into it as saying, listen, this is this is a conversation. This isn't about me talking at you. It's about me talking with you. And you can see the wall come down, you know. Because they're construction workers aren't, you know, they're not, yay, classroom. But uh, so you know, it's good. They uh so again, nobody wants to be talked at. People want to be walked with, they want their voice to be heard as well. And as teachers, we need to hear their voice so we can either, you know, uh uh approve or correct.

Stacy Jo 15:11

But I also want to say that because you don't need to have it all figured out, because you don't need to know it all and have all the answers, don't be afraid to disciple others. Because you can be discipling people that you're only a step or two ahead of.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 15:30

And so I think that sometimes can get in the way too, because people think, well, I I can't disciple anyone because I don't know how to disciple someone. I'm not that far along.

Allen 15:39

Right. A teacher can learn something from a student.

Stacy Jo 15:43

Absolutely.

Allen 15:44

And I I will uh I won't name any names, but I'm uh I'm uh involved with the uh the grit men. Uh it's it's our group, and there's a kid in that group, and I say he's a kid because I'm fifty-six and he's eighteen, and that kid inspires me.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Yeah.

Allen 16:01

And uh and I j I'm just watching him grow. And and it they say it takes a village, and and the kid inspires me. And and uh and I learn something from him, not all the time, but his his tenacity, and he's got what uh really what what I wish every kid had at 17, 18 years old. He'd been through uh those a tough seventeen years, but he's uh you can see him just rising up.

SPEAKER_01 16:33

Right.

Allen 16:33

Uh and uh but you know, so and I'm not the only one, you know. We we're learning from each other. It's so you don't have to be the the elder or the sage of the tribe.

SPEAKER_01 16:44

Yeah.

Allen 16:44

And I told this kid yesterday, I was like, you inspire me, bro. And you could see that hit him like a two-ton heavy thing. I'm not saying it for a fact, I'm saying it because it's true.

Stacy Jo 16:57

Right.

Allen 16:58

So so for what it's worth.

Stacy Jo 17:00

Yeah. But you know, have you did you notice that Jesus never talked at people? He engaged them in conversation. I mean, of course, like only he could, but even though he had all the answers, he asked questions. He sat with people, he let conversations breathe. He met people where they were, not where he wished they were. I think that's so important because you know, we can take someone on and disciple them and expect them to be at a specific place, and when they're not, we can be like, Well, we wish they were they were there.

SPEAKER_01 17:38

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 17:39

But Jesus met them where they were. Let you the woman at the well, Zacchaeus in the tree. You know, I'm not gonna sing it again.

Allen 17:47

Come on. I was open. I was open.

Stacy Jo 17:52

If you don't know what we're talking about, uh go back and watch one of our previous, I don't even know which one it was at this point. But anyway, we should. But, you know, the disciples uh about arguing about who was the greatest, you know, Jesus didn't open with a lecture. He opened with curiosity and compassion. Yeah. And his is a posture that is worth studying.

Allen 18:19

Yeah, I mean, it's it's uh he's our exemplar. Exactly. You know, he's he's how how it's done. And everything that he did, that's how it's done.

SPEAKER_01 18:28

Right.

Allen 18:29

So reeling it back in, our our second thing that skews our posture is impatience. And I don't know anything about this one. Uh says the one who knows me better than anyone, uh, except Jesus. Uh so I say that uh jokingly. Impatience, my goodness. So um so if you if you don't know that uh uh discipleship is a slow process. Uh there's there and if you're and if it if it's a quick process for you, then you're doing it wrong. Uh so are you so first, are you aware that the people are slow on the pickup sometimes and they rarely operate on your timeline.

SPEAKER_01 19:17

Right.

Allen 19:18

Uh most most people were discipling, they'll or we're teaching. Well, they'll take two steps forward and one step back, and they appear to be following along, and then blam oh, they forget everything by Thursday.

SPEAKER_01 19:34

Yeah.

Allen 19:35

Uh they fall short often. And they uh and if you're aiming at quick results, like most of us are right here in 21st century America, then uh then you are going to be disappointed. Uh they're the the gradual snail's pace is frustrating. But I'll tell you, I'll tell you what helps with that, is remembering where you started. How frustrating were you? I know that I was, and in fact I I still am, uh frustrating. It's important for us all to remember as as we're as we're pouring in to these people, as we're pouring into the ones that the the Lord uh showed us. This this is your dude, this is your one more, as Joby Martin would say. Uh it's important to remember who saw us through our blockhead moments, and and apply the same patience and grace here and now with them.

Stacy Jo 20:44

Yeah, that's a that's a good word, babe. Um, you know, nevertheless, though, frustrating is putting it mildly in a lot of cases. I think every person who has ever discipled someone has had the moment of, Lord, we talked about this. Why aren't they getting it?

SPEAKER_01 21:00

No.

Stacy Jo 21:01

Why don't they remember what we talked about? Hello. And then the Holy Spirit quietly reminds us of something that we're still working on after twenty years of walking with him or more. And there it is. Blamo. And there it is. Suddenly you have a lot more grace for that person in front of you than you did.

Allen 21:26

It's uh it's convicting and true all at the same time. Uh but um our third posture, and this this is another one. Uh I've had to turn down a couple opportunities here because uh our third challenge is availability or the lack of availability. Uh, and like I said, I know this one pretty well. Uh real, authentic, real time discipleship requires us to be interruptible. Uh and leaders, especially uh we're not very good at being interruptible, our calendars. Are full, uh our bandwidth is limited. Um and when someone needs us in an inconvenient time, and and that's almost always when they're gonna need for us in those inconvenient times when they need us, that uh it's easy for us to defer, it's easy for us to delay, it's easy for us just to show up to yeah, okay, I'll I'll be there, but they're only gonna get like 30% of us at best, and that's not it. You know, we're technically showing up, but we're are we really there? Right. The answer's no. I I mean I've I've been that guy. I've showed up and I've taken the call and they didn't get all of me and it and it shows. Uh it's not a good thing, but unfortunately it's a common thing. Right. And that but just because it's common doesn't make it right and acceptable.

Stacy Jo 22:59

Yes. And and people know when they only have 30% of you.

SPEAKER_01 23:05

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 23:05

And what they learn from you is relationally detrimental because they experience that they are not worth your full presence.

Allen 23:14

That's what they take away.

Stacy Jo 23:15

That's that's what they that's what they glean from that.

Allen 23:18

Right.

Stacy Jo 23:18

And that is the exact opposite of what discipleship is supposed to communicate. You know, Jesus was constantly being interrupted. Constantly. Look how many times in the Bible it talks about him being interrupted.

SPEAKER_01 23:35

Right.

Stacy Jo 23:36

And he treated every interruption like it was the most important thing happening.

SPEAKER_01 23:41

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 23:41

Like that person was the most important thing in that moment.

SPEAKER_01 23:44

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 23:45

Because to him it was.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

Right.

Stacy Jo 23:47

It is it was his heart posture.

Allen 23:50

That's his it's his heart posture that we need to mimic or emanate. Right.

Stacy Jo 23:55

Absolutely. We need to emanate his heart posture. So, you know, we go back to the deny yourself, pick up your cross, follow me. And as discipleship mentors, are we ready to do that? That's the question we have to ask.

Allen 24:12

Are we ready to do that? Do we have, do we have the time? Do we have the space? Is our heart right? Are we able to do that?

Stacy Jo 24:21

Are we willing to do that? Because we might have the space.

Allen 24:24

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 24:25

We might have the space, but are you willing to give up that time?

Allen 24:29

Aaron Powell And is God calling you to that? Is the Lord calling you to that, or is are you just filling space? Right. Because if we're just filling space for the sake of filling space or if we're doing good things, are we doing God things? Why are we doing it? Right. Right. Uh because I've I've uh I thought, yeah, uh I was given this opportunity to presented with an opportunity, and I was like, yeah, it sounds like a good idea. I I might like to do that. But I knew full well that one, I didn't have the time to do it. Uh and I and I prayed over it for like three weeks and there was no God push toward that.

SPEAKER_01 25:04

Yeah.

Allen 25:04

So it what it do it wasn't for me either way.

SPEAKER_01 25:07

Yeah.

Allen 25:07

And it would have put me in quite a pickle if I had just decided, uh, yeah, sure, we're gonna do that. Uh definitely not.

Stacy Jo 25:15

Well, with the Association of Christian Business Women, we're looking at starting a discipleship program next year because discipleship has been so heavy on my heart for women who want to go deeper and finding the right people, you know, we're just starting that search for the right people to be the mentors, to be the disciplers.

SPEAKER_01 25:38

Right.

Stacy Jo 25:39

And uh it it's important to know if God is calling you to it. I'm still praying into it, but I firmly believe that that's where God is leading us and that he's opening doors because of some things that have happened. But but we have to not only have the time, but we have to be willing to use our time and be called into that.

Allen 25:58

Right. I think I think that as a that's the yeah.

Stacy Jo 26:03

So Because if you're not I just I want to take it a step further, because if you're not and you do it, and then halfway through, because ours is gonna be a twelve a twelve month discipleship commitment, halfway through it, you decide, you know what, I'm not cut out for this. I don't want to do this. Yeah, that's not well now you're leaving people behind that's bad. You're supposed to be discipling.

Allen 26:28

Right.

Stacy Jo 26:28

And how does that look?

Allen 26:30

Well, it it doesn't look good, but if and if the Lord's not gonna call you to something that you're gonna walk away from. So it it's uh it's up to it's up to him to call us into that. And that was my point. That's your point. And uh so this is all something that we gotta consider before we're taking on such a responsibility. Yeah. It's huge.

SPEAKER_01 26:49

Right.

Allen 26:49

We we have to prayerfully consider how are we are we able and are we being called to it? Right. First and foremost, are we being called to it? Because if we're just doing it to do the thing.

Stacy Jo 27:05

Yeah. Or to look good.

Allen 27:07

Yeah. Or yeah, for is it a pride thing? Yeah. It's we we must recognize that before we go and, you know, instead of helping someone, we end up damaging someone.

Stacy Jo 27:19

Exactly. So exactly.

Allen 27:21

So with that established, we got three practical things that that actually build proper people posture.

Stacy Jo 27:29

Can you say that again?

Allen 27:31

Proper people posture? Is that funny?

Stacy Jo 27:35

Proper people posture. Say that ten times. Like it's like purple people leader.

Allen 27:41

Not quite, but it's kind of funny. Um but yeah, so three practical things that that can help us toward um now. It's funny. Proper people posture. Uh and you can start uh this week. We would encourage you, if you're being called in this direction, to start today. Yeah. You know. So will the Lord give you a quick answer?

SPEAKER_02 28:08

Right.

Allen 28:08

Uh no, it's he he speaks to us all differently. But the fact is that he speaks to us all.

Stacy Jo 28:13

That's right.

Allen 28:14

Uh so we have to first one.

Stacy Jo 28:16

Well, we have to come with curiosity, not just with content. And so before your next conversation with someone you're mentoring, resist the urge to prepare a lesson. Resist it. You may have everything figured out in your mind that you know you want to say, but instead prepare a real experiential question, something like, what is God showing you right now? Or or where do you feel stuck?

SPEAKER_01 28:42

Right.

Stacy Jo 28:43

Or what's the hardest thing you're dealing with in this in this season or in this week. And then just listen. And I don't mean sit there and nod your head.

SPEAKER_02 28:53

Don't do that.

Stacy Jo 28:54

Don't just sit there and smile and nod your head, but really listen with both ears. That's why God gave you two. And let their answers guide the conversation, and you will be amazed at how much more effective it is than anything that you had planned to say.

Allen 29:12

Yeah.

Stacy Jo 29:13

Listen with your heart.

Allen 29:15

Yeah. The eye, that's what the uh Paul writes in Ephesians. I pray that you will listen with the eyes of your heart.

SPEAKER_01 29:21

Right.

Allen 29:22

And uh, yeah. Uh so second, we got we got three things. This is uh two of three. We got to slow down our expectations. And I'll I'll take this back to uh real quick early in recovery. Uh uh a dear friend of mine who I haven't seen in a while. He's like, Man, you gotta be careful with those expectations, bro. He goes, one one sure thing about people is they'll let you down. Your expectations of people will let you down eventually, if not every time. So we have to slow down our expectations. Uh, you got to decide. We got to decide right now that that you're in this for the long haul with your people.

Stacy Jo 30:07

Right.

Allen 30:07

Not for a quick turnaround, not for a six-week transformation, whatever that is. Uh y'all know that Jesus discipled 12 for over three years. Right. Three years. And 11 went on to change the world. 12, if you include Paul.

SPEAKER_01 30:27

Right.

Allen 30:28

Who and and people would argue that Paul's a Paul was an apostle, but Paul had a a living experience with the Savior on the road to Damascus. Look it up.

SPEAKER_01 30:38

Yeah.

Allen 30:38

Um, so but the these they went on, he he was with them. Uh so you gotta you gotta consider. Are you willing to be with them? Are you willing to be with them for the long haul? You're committing to someone's journey, not their highlight reel. Uh you want to set realistic expectations? Expect them to stumble. Because they will. Uh just like you did. Now be honest here. Remember, be you stumbled. And if you didn't stumble, then you're stumbling now because you're lying to yourself. Because we all stumble, you know, and we got to remember who mentored us, who discipled us, and and how challenging we were. I was quite a ball of wax. Anyway, uh we got to remember that our it's not our job to fix them quickly. It's not our job to fix them anyway. The sanctification and the process belongs to the Holy Spirit. Um, what our job is, is to stay. Keep showing up. Something the Lord asks, Lord, what do you want? He's like, I want you to shine, and I want you to stay the path. Stay the path. It's up to us as disciplers to stay the path. What kind of consistency are you displaying? What kind of consistency are you depicting when when when we stay the path, when we're with them in the long haul, when we keep showing up when when we don't really want to. But we keep showing up, it's that kind of consistency uh that's rare.

SPEAKER_01 32:32

Right.

Allen 32:32

It's it's rare and than any other wisdom that we could possibly share with them.

SPEAKER_01 32:39

Yeah.

Allen 32:39

Authentic commitment, that's what people are looking for, because it's rare these days. Authentic commitment and consistency. That's what transforms people. And that's our part. The rest is the Holy Spirit's the Holy Spirit's job. So we're not changing hearts, we're presenting experience.

Stacy Jo 33:01

Right. And then third, you know, we have to guard our own souls so that we have something to give. We cannot pour from an empty cup.

SPEAKER_01 33:12

No.

Stacy Jo 33:12

I've tried. I can tell you it doesn't work. And that's not just a bumper sticker, it is real. If you're running on empty, if your own walk with God is thin, if you haven't been filled up yourself, you will have very little to offer people you're trying to disciple. The posture of a multiplier starts with our own health, our own time with God, our own willingness to keep growing, because Luke 640, right, the empty cup, there it is. Well, you're dripping a little bit.

Allen 33:46

Well there's not much in a drip.

Stacy Jo 33:49

But Luke 640 goes both ways. They will become like you. So keep becoming more like Jesus.

Allen 33:58

Right. This is a good picture. It it says faithfully invested, but there's nothing left.

Stacy Jo 34:06

That's a good picture.

SPEAKER_04 34:08

We can't cannot pour from an empty cup.

Stacy Jo 34:11

But if I pour into you, right now you have something too. Anyhow, just to give you a little bit of a picture.

Allen 34:26

A little visual, a little impromptu.

Stacy Jo 34:28

Right.

Allen 34:29

Right. Um, but the tie-in to what you were saying uh is the posture of a multiplier is it's the posture of a servant. And Philippians 2 says, we and we mentioned this earlier, says, Count others more significant than yourself, and that's it. Paul wrote this, but he's talking about Jesus. And he's talking about how Jesus told him to be, and and he's sharing this with the Church of Philippi. Count others as more significant than yourself. Paul, uh, Paul didn't just come up with this, right? He had an experience with Jesus. And uh says, look to their interests. And again, this isn't a personality type. Uh we have to want to do this too. Right. We have to be, you mentioned willingness, and willingness is huge. If we're doing this because we feel that we we we just gotta do it. Uh if we're not willing to do it, if we're going out there with a lack of willingness, and it will fail.

SPEAKER_01 35:41

Right.

Allen 35:42

Uh it's not a personality type, it's a daily decision toward willingness, toward being who the Lord called you to be for someone else, uh, for that that one more, as Pastor Joby Martin would uh would call them as the one more, who's your one more? Uh and every time that you decide for them, show up a hundred percent, slow down your agenda, and genuinely give yourself to their growth, you're doing exactly what Jesus did.

SPEAKER_01 36:19

Right.

Allen 36:20

And that's what gets multiplied, that's what they pick up.

Stacy Jo 36:23

Yeah.

Allen 36:24

And that's what they'll carry to someone else.

Stacy Jo 36:27

Yeah. So we always like to give you one action step. So here's your one thing this week. Before your next interaction with someone that you're mentoring, pause and check your posture and ask yourself honestly Am I coming into this for them or for me? Am I available or am I present? Am I willing to be slow, to be interrupted, to be curious instead of just informative? Because just that one heart check will change the quality of every discipleship conversation that you have.

Allen 37:06

Absolutely. Posture's the foundation. Uh, if we when we get that right, everything else builds on that solid foundation. But if we get it wrong, even the best content, you can have all the scriptures lined up and flowing into each other, and it's just beautiful on the page, but it falls flat if your posture's not right. We've said it before, we'll say it again. Jesus was the greatest teacher who had ever lived, and he started with presence.

Stacy Jo 37:39

Yes.

Allen 37:40

Not 30% present, a hundred percent present. Actually, he was 200% present because he was he was a hundred percent man, a hundred percent God.

SPEAKER_01 37:50

True.

Allen 37:50

You know, so but he that he started with presence, and he decided that being with people was so much better than just being around people. And we encourage you to do the same today. How about you pray us out, lady?

Stacy Jo 38:04

I can do that. So, Lord, we ask that you would check our posture right now. Show us any place within ourselves where pride or impatience or busyness has crept into the way that we show up for people. Give us the humility to come with curiosity instead of with answers. Give us the patience to stay in it for the long haul and fill us up so we have something real to give. We want to multiply what you've put in us, and we know that it starts with the condition of our hearts. Have your way in us. Do what only you can do, and show us this next right step. And we pray all this in the name of Jesus.

Allen 38:56

Yes, Lord, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 38:57

Thank you, Lord.

Allen 38:59

Um so, friends, episode three is coming at you pretty quick, and we're taking it to the house, as my old buddy Danny uh used to say. We are taking it to the house. That's right. We are we are bringing it home, and we're talking about discipleship in the home, your marriage, your kids, the people closest to you, because the most powerful discipleship environment is in a church program, it's in your house. So don't miss it. Coming at you soon.

Stacy Jo 39:30

So until then, stay faithfully invested, because when you do, God brings the increase. Yes, he does. Have a great week.

Allen 39:40

Thanks for joining us on Faithfully Invested with Alan and Stacy Joe. If today's conversation encouraged you, challenged you, or helped you see your calling more clearly, don't keep it to yourself.

Stacy Jo 39:51

That's right. Share it with a friend, leave a five-star review, and keep leaning into God's blueprint for your life, your leadership, and your legacy. So until next time, remember when you invest in his kingdom, he brings the increase.