The Islamic Approach to Suicide: Finding Hope in Darkness

Sheikh Haitham Al-Haddad offers profound Islamic insights on preventing suicide, addressing hopelessness, and finding meaning during difficult times. Through Quranic principles and prophetic guidance, he provides a comprehensive approach to mental distress that addresses physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual dimensions.

• Life is inherently a test, so difficulties should be expected rather than surprising
• The sanctity of life in Islam extends to all creatures, with human life holding special value
• Despairing of Allah's mercy may be a greater sin than many realize
• Muslims have the lowest suicide rates among religious groups in the UK, demonstrating religion's protective effect
• Those contemplating suicide often mistakenly believe death ends suffering, when Islamic teaching shows accountability continues
• Finding hope requires understanding both dunya (worldly) and akhira (afterlife) perspectives
• Effective support combines physical practices (prayer, exercise), intellectual understanding, and emotional connection
• Remembering the temporary nature of this life compared to eternity helps contextualise current suffering
• Every challenge contains hidden opportunities for spiritual growth and development
• Muslims are created to lead humanity by example, carrying divine light to benefit others

Visit Islam21c.com/HoldOn to access resources from our campaign designed to provide Islamic tools for preventing suicide and addressing hopelessness in our communities.

Chapters

• 0:00 Islamic Principles on Life and Death
• 9:22 The Test of Life: Understanding Purpose
• 18:22 Sanctity of Life in Islam
• 31:56 Tools to Handle Pain and Suffering
• 50:51 The Power of Hope in Islamic Tradition
• 1:10:25 Stories of Overcoming Suicidal Thoughts
• 1:25:37 Physical, Emotional, and Intellectual Healing
• 1:37:40 The Perspective of Akhira (Hereafter)

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hamza, please share this principle with every single one in the world that in Islam there is nothing called.

Speaker 2: 0:09

But what you've just done, sheikh, because you've answered all the questions and the reason you've done it, because it's so powerful you have shown that if we have the correct For him.

Speaker 1: 0:19

why does he need to live after that? All of these years he was looking after them and when they became very beautiful, promising children, all of a sudden they were killed With Iman. We need some tools to help people to handle the pain. That's why I'll tell you a secret, hamza. We, as an Ummah, were created to lead, not to be led.

Speaker 2: 0:47

On Guard is not just a podcast. It's a call to conscience Born from the heart of Islam 21c. It stands as a shield for the Ummah and a voice for truth in times of confusion and crisis. Each episode brings together courageous voices and profound insights. Each episode brings together courageous voices and profound insights, spotlighting Islam 21C's campaigns and the causes that matter most to our community. In this powerful episode, dr Sheikh Haitham Al-Haddad, a jurist at the Islamic Council, shares timeless principles and invaluable insights drawn from his extensive experience addressing the critical issues of suicide, ideation and hopelessness. This episode is anchored around the themes of our new campaign Hold On. As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh Shaykh Wa alaykum as-salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

Speaker 2: 1:37

How are you?

Speaker 1: 1:38

Hamza masha'Allah, how are you?

Speaker 2: 1:40

I'm always well when I see you. Rizak, allah khair.

Speaker 1: 1:46

Always. Alhamdulillah, this is out of your goodness.

Speaker 2: 1:48

Mashallah, no, no, no, it's. You know, maybe it's the hadith of the Prophet, when he said Al-mu'minu, miratul mu'min.

Speaker 1: 1:53

The believer is a mirror of another believer, so positivity reflects onto me and so on, and so forth. Ya Allah accept from us Ameen, and so on and so forth. Yeah, I like to have to from us. I mean I mean yeah.

Speaker 2: 2:04

So we're going to be talking about a very serious and deep topic, which is the topic of suicide and the topic of suicide ideation, thinking about suicide and also despair and having a sense of hopelessness. Yeah, notwithstanding the medical staff, notwithstanding all of those particular issues, we're going to zoom in on the Islamic, spiritual, theological, conceptual, principled approach. What does the Quran and Sunnah say about these things? I have a set of questions for you. But before we start those questions, it's important for everyone to know that being religious, specifically being Muslim, is actually a very good barrier. It's a buffer against mental distress. Even in the academic Western literature they talk about that. Religiosity is a buffer against suicide, a buffer against mental distress and so on and so forth. And even in the UK, amongst the religions, the Muslims have the lowest rate of suicide for men it's around 5.16 per hundred thousand and for women it's less, around two nevertheless, it's still a Muslim world?

Speaker 1: 3:15

I guess it is the course, absolutely and.

Speaker 2: 3:17

But the issue here is it's still too much. One is too much right, yeah, but I think now, generally, there is a kind of trend or a feeling amongst our communities in the UK, maybe in the West, that because of liberalism, because of Western ideology, if you like, what has happened, or even individualism and atomism, even individualism and atomism, what has happened, is a lot of young muslims and even slightly older muslims, they are suffering from thinking about suicide.

Speaker 2: 3:51

Yeah, a sense of hopelessness, a sense of yeah, despair yeah, and you know you could speak to anyone in the community and you know this better than most that someone knows someone who thought about suicide or someone knows someone who's had mental distress or they're in a state of despair or hopelessness. And yet we have a very rich tradition. The Dean is so powerful to give us the essential tools to actually deal with this. So it's a very, very, very important campaign that we have as Islam 21C, which is called Hold On, which is aimed at providing those tools and empowering the community so the individuals and the community can work together so we could prevent suicide ideation, thinking about suicide, prevent people from committing suicide and also helping people with a sense of hopelessness and despair. In actual fact, it's serious, these mental issues, Even du'at sometimes who are?

Speaker 2: 4:49

on the forefront of the dawah sometimes suffer from this type of mental distress, so I want to hear from you. So I've got a bunch of questions for you. So the first question is and you're more than welcome to push back at me and say I don't like your question, give me another question. And you're more than welcome to push back at me and say I don't like your question.

Speaker 1: 5:07

Give me another question. Yeah, you don't need, I don't need your permission to tell me, I will do it anyway.

Speaker 2: 5:13

Of course you will. So the first question is that obviously suicide is a deeply painful topic, both socially, theologically, individually. So how does Islam, through the Quran and the Sunnah, frame the sanctity of life and the gravity of the issue of suicide? So let's start generally from that perspective.

Speaker 1: 5:33

Yeah, okay. Bismillahirrahmanirrahim, alhamdulillah, was-salatu wa-salaam ala rasulillah, first of all, you know this discussion about suicide. I want everyone to benefit from it, not those who have those thoughts. I want the entire Muslim community to benefit from it, because it is as you said. It is linked to mental distress and mental problems. And you know, they said now in fact, I was speaking to a psychiatrist a few days ago and he said I said to him they said in 2030, one out of five will have a mental problem. He said, in fact, now we have it Now, so it is a huge problem. And they said it is. You know, cancer, heart problems and mental problems are the top three.

Speaker 2: 6:34

Yeah anyway.

Speaker 1: 6:36

so we want the entire Muslim community to benefit from it in order to deal with other related mental challenges, and we also want the Muslim community to benefit from it in order to help the non-Muslim community.

Speaker 2: 6:54

Absolutely.

Speaker 1: 6:55

Because remember that we are here as Muslims not to benefit ourselves. We are here to benefit the entire humanity. We are the bearer of light, of the light of Allah, and Allah says Allah is the light of heavens and earth, and Allah says so, we carry the light of Allah, and so on. There are so many verses that confirm this. And on the other side, we are the best of nation because we enjoy the good and forbid the evil. So we have a duty towards our society here and of, of course, our community, our community first, and then the society at large, and this is part of our vision as Muslims in the UK. We want to come across as a role model for other communities. So we need, once we protect ourselves from this and once we are able to provide them with solutions, then, inshallah, that will be beneficial. Last point I would like to say is that you know, it is very unfortunate that Muslims are not reflecting the richness of the Qur'an and Sunnah and their heritage in humanities, social sciences yeah, especially in humanities, social sciences. The Qur'an is full of sociology, anthropology, social sciences, humanities. We are unable to discover those and present it to the whole world. And now I appeal always to the younger generation and you are though you are not very young, but you are younger than me. Okay, to start really produce solutions for the problems. Start really produce solutions for the problems the entire humanity is facing, in humanities and in social sciences, or problems related to humanism and social sciences. I want Muslims to participate actively in presenting academic solutions, intellectual solutions, all types of forms, solutions in all types of forms. Now, once we talk about this, we need first of all to understand a very important, see, two important principles. Yeah, two important principles. The first principle is yeah, this life is created as a test, so it is meant to be difficult, it is meant to have challenges. Yes, see, hamza, this is for us, we take it for granted, but sometimes we don't have deep belief in it, and many people they listen to it, many Muslims they listen to it and say yes, yes, yes, but they don't know how deep, intellectually, that statement is that Allah created this life as a test, and one of the highest aims and objectives of Sharia is testing people. Allah says خَلَقَ الْمَوْتَ وَالْحَيَاةَ لِيَبْلُوَكُمْ. He created death and life in order to test you. So he created us to test us. Allah also says إِنَّا جَامْعَلْنَا مَعَلَىٰ الْأَرْضِ زِينَةً لَهَا, لِنَبْلُوَهُمْ, أَيُّهُمْ أَحْسَنُوا عَمَلًا. We created this life, we decorated it to test them. إِنَّ Insāna min-nūtfatin amshādin nabtalīhi.

Speaker 1: 11:06

Yeah, so he created a human being from a sperm and then we made him into tissues. What for? Look at this, linabtalīhi, to test him. Okay, now, this means that the default is you, me, everyone will live. What In hardship and difficulties, yes or no? The default is not the opposite. The default is not to ask why I am going through difficulties and I'm going through stress, I am going through difficulties and I'm going through stress. The default is to ask yourself or the default question is Alhamdulillah, I am fine why I am not facing difficulties, why I'm not facing challenges. This is the default, as simple as this.

Speaker 2: 12:05

But your ease can also be a test as well. Excellent.

Speaker 1: 12:09

Your blessings can be a test as well. So that's why, when the person is saying, why I'm not tested? No, you are tested, but in a different way. You will never cease not to be tested as a human being. You are in a state of challenges, of tests, full stop, full stop. Allah says we test you with ease, as you said, and we test you with difficulties. So you are as a human being. You are said and we test you with difficulties. So you are as a human being. You are in a state of what? Of tests. Of course, believers are also tested, not disbelievers are also tested. All human beings are tested. This is principle number one. Principle number two life and death doesn't belong to us, or they don't belong to us, they belong to Allah.

Speaker 2: 13:13

Who gave you life, allah.

Speaker 1: 13:14

Who will take the life? Allah? Allah does not allow anyone to take the life of anyone. See, this is a very important rule. Allah does not allow anyone to take the life of anyone. See, this is a very important rule. Allah does not allow anyone to take the life of any, not anyone, any human being, but any living being, any living being. Allah is saying this is my life, yeah, gave it, I give it to whom I want and I take it from whom I want. You cannot kill anything except with my permission. Okay, so that's why the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said there are five harming animals. They can be killed at any time. So this means what the asl is, what. There are five harming animals. They can be killed at any time. So this means what the asl is, what the original principle is, what.

Speaker 1: 14:13

Don't kill anything? Yeah, a bird is not harming you. What is you? Why do you kill it? The Prophet even condemned a person for just killing a bird, an insect. Why to kill it?

Speaker 1: 14:25

The Prophet even condemned a person for just killing a bird, an insect, why to kill it if it is not harming you? Yeah, why to kill it? Just leave it, okay. So, even slaughtering, slaughtering, why? Allah says وَلَا تَأْكُلُوا مِمَّا نَمْ يُذْكَرِ اسْمُ اللَّهِ عَلَيْهِ وَإِنَّهُ لَفِسْقٌ.

Speaker 1: 14:47

Don't eat anything that was slaughtered. Without what? Mentioning the name of Allah? Mentioning the name of Allah means that the person is slaughtering it under the permission and authority of Allah. Yes, if you are killing it, slaughtering it without the permission of Allah, not under the supervision of Allah, you are not allowed to eat it. As simple as this, of course, human beings, their life it as simple as this, of course, human beings, their life is more have, more sanctity and more sacred. And that's why Allah says Arabic. He wrote upon Bani Israel and upon all nations that if you kill any nafs here even some scholars said nafs is it limited to human beings or does it include all living beings? And most of the scholars said any living being, sorry, human beings. The one who kills a nafs without the right reason, yes, as if he killed the entire humanity, yeah, and similarly, the one who gives it life, as if he has given life to the entire humanity.

Speaker 2: 16:40

Saves the life, yeah.

Speaker 1: 16:41

Yeah, saves their life. Now, some people say, some people say, maybe some religions. They say, oh so your religion allows killing. Your religion allows killing. Tell me where on earth any civilization? One time a Hindu guy, he said to me your religion allows killing. And I said the country that represents you, yeah, kills more people than what you claim. So is there any civilization, any country any, that doesn't kill? America kills, russia kills, china kills, every country kills, and they kills what? In millions. So no one should say, well, allow, no, islam regulates not killing. Islam, the only religion that gave this level of sanctity for human beings is Islam.

Speaker 2: 17:52

But Islam is a realistic religion rather than what romantic religion and we have ethical rules of war based on guidance from Allah, and that's a different discussion.

Speaker 1: 18:03

Exactly, guidance from Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta-A'la, and that's a different discussion Exactly, but I just want so no one would say that, oh yeah, so you are talking about Islam allows, okay, no, there is an ethical framework for that Now. So this is killing Now. So this is killing living being. Yes, yeah, in general speaking is prohibited. Killing human speaking it's prohibited. Killing human beings is even more prohibited. Now, killing Muslims is even worse than that. So it is like a pyramid. The top of it is what Killing Muslims. That's why Allah says, allah says five types of severe punishments and that's why killing a Muslim is the worst crime a human being can commit.

Speaker 1: 19:12

And we all know the story of Ashab al-Ukhdud, why Allah Jalla wa'ala was so angry and Allah Jalla wa'ala was so angry, and Allah Jalla wa'ala threatened that Allah Jalla wa'ala will punish them, those who killed believers, and then they did not repent. Allah Jalla wa'ala will punish them severely. So life has sanctity in Islam and, as we said, no one has the permission to take life. You know, we Muslims, of course Christianity, have this regarding fetus, and you know pregnancy, abortion, yeah, abortion, yeah. In Islam, if you abort a child after 120 days, you have to pay the blood money. Yeah, even if the mother did it, even if the father, the mother did it, even if the father the father, if he did it, if the mother did it, they have to repent to Allah and they have to pay fidya, etc. So so we can go on and on talking about the sanctity of what of life.

Speaker 1: 20:43

Now killing yourself. So you are violating all of these. Yeah, you are violating all of these and, on top of that, you are killing yourself. Yeah, on top of that, you are going what? Against the Qadar of Allah? Yes, so that's why the Prophet said in one hadith, a very important hadith, that whoever stabbed himself to kill himself, he will be stabbing himself forever in the fire of hell. Whoever drinks poison to kill himself, he will be stabbing himself forever in the fire of hell. Whoever drinks poison to kill himself, he will be drinking poison forever in the fire of hell. Whoever throws himself from a mountain or something to kill himself, he will be continuously doing this in the fire of hell, forever. Now we have to set a very important rule yeah, that it doesn't mean that he is a disbeliever.

Speaker 2: 21:55

Yes, of course.

Speaker 1: 21:57

Yeah, although the Prophet said forever here is relatively, it means that he committed a huge crime.

Speaker 2: 22:08

It means a long time.

Speaker 1: 22:09

A long time, a very long time so, and this means that the sin is so huge, yes, as if it is going to throw him in the fire of hell forever. Going to throw him in the fire of hell forever. You know, there is subhanAllah. Despite this, despite this, there is a very beautiful hadith, wallahi, an amazing hadith.

Speaker 1: 22:42

One of the sahaba, tufail ibn Amr Jabir, said that Tufail ibn Amr migrated to the Prophet along with one of his friends. His friend was not strong in Iman, so when he came to Medina, migrating from Makkah as you know, the weather, the atmosphere is he became very ill. So what did he do? He killed himself by cutting his. Either his wrist or cutting the neck is his rest. So he died, his friend Al-Tufail. He said I saw him in the dream, I saw him in Jannah. I said man, what happened to you? He said. He said Allah forgave me. Because of what? Because of my hijrah to the Prophet. They said I see your hand. That is something wrong in your hand. He said yes, allah told me, you spoiled it yourself. We'll not fix it for you.

Speaker 2: 24:09

SubhanAllah.

Speaker 1: 24:11

As a form of punishment. Yeah, so he went to the Prophet and the Prophet approved the dream. So now this means and now he actually commented on this he said this is a proof that the manhaj of Ahl al-Sunnah, that a believer, this, that or Al-Qurtubi. He said this is a proof that, yeah, the manhaj of Ahl al-Sunnah, that a believer, he will not leave the fold of Al-Islam with any sin. Yes, yeah, even if it is a major sin. And in this context, even if it's suicide.

Speaker 2: 24:48

Killing himself, and it could be the case, according to what you just mentioned, that a deed such as the one that you mentioned, which is the hijrah to the Prophet, that that could basically wipe out the sin.

Speaker 1: 25:02

Exactly Overwhelmed or overweight the sin that he has committed.

Speaker 2: 25:09

Yeah, because I think amongst some people within our community they think that if someone committed suicide, therefore they're a disbeliever or they're going to hell forever. But that is not necessarily the case, according to the evidence that you just showed us Exactly.

Speaker 1: 25:22

And this is that. By the way, this is the consensus of all Muslim scholars. Yes, this is the consensus.

Speaker 2: 25:28

Alhamdulillah, so good. That's a very comprehensive, multi-layered approach to the first question, but there is another question that relates to this. On guard is more than media. It's dawah, defense and duty. In an age of confusion, we speak truth for the sake of Allah. If you believe this is a cause worthy of reward in this life and the next, then become a guardian, stand with us and be written among those who strove. Click below to find out more and subscribe to on guard wherever you get your podcasts. And now back to the episode.

Speaker 2: 26:04

There is another question that relates to this. What do you think is the hikmah, the wisdom, the divine wisdom concerning showing that suicide is one of the greatest sins? Because think about it from a psychological perspective. Say, I'm in a state of despair, a state of suicide ideation. I'm in a state of hopelessness, yeah, and I have potential options from my own free will that I can do. One of them includes suicide, would you say, if someone has Iman, even weak Iman, they believe in Allah and His Messenger and they believe that this is not their life to take. It belongs to Allah, it's not mine, I can't do whatever I want with my body. Do you believe the strong prohibition and the fact that suicide is a great evil sin and the fact that Allah owns our bodies. These ideas, do you think they act as a barrier to making such a choice? Okay, good.

Speaker 2: 27:06

Because some people intuitively would say this is not helpful. But I think it is helpful because if someone from the paradigm of Islam, the world of Islam, they know this is not their body, this belongs to Allah, they know that if they commit suicide, it has potentially grave consequences. That itself, the hikmah behind that is that if Allah knows you better than you know yourself, then there is a way out, and this is not an option. Okay, see unpack that?

Speaker 1: 27:36

yeah, okay, okay. Let me talk in two directions. Yes, okay, connected to each other. First of all, that the, the, the committing suicide, yeah, goes against number of key principles in Islam. First of all, the first principle is that, as you said, this life, as we said in the beginning, that this life is not yours, this body is not yours, this ruh is not yours. Number one, okay. Number two it means that you have dispaired, and Allah says إِنَّهُ لَا يَيْأَسُ مِنْ رَوْحِ اللَّهِ, إِلَّا الْقَوْمُ الْكَافِرُونَ. Yes, this is a very important principle. I want to see, hamza, please Share this principle with every single one in the world that in Islam, there is nothing called losing hope yeah, losing hope in anything, by the way, yeah. Losing hope that Allah will give you victory, losing hope that Allah will cure you, losing hope that Allah which is the most important part, that Allah will shower you with His mercy, losing hope that you can become a good person yeah, there is.

Speaker 1: 29:02

In Islam, there is nothing called losing hope, losing hope that Allah will not accept your repentance, yeah, that's why Allah becomes so angry at a person who is killing himself because he has lost hope. He had bad thoughts about Allah, let alone that he violated the rights of what? The sanctity of human beings, of living beings? But on top of that, he lost hope in Allah. And Allah says as the Prophet said Allah says I am according to what my slave thinks of me. So if he thinks of me good, I am good Means. I will treat him well. If he thinks that I will not treat him well, I will not treat him well. If he thinks that I will not treat him well, I will not treat him well. I want him to think good of me. This is the Hadith Qudsi.

Speaker 1: 30:01

The Hadith Qudsi and the Prophet, sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said that Allah Dall'Ala accept the repentance of the what Of the person? Yes, until he will keep accepting the repentance of the person unless the sun comes from the west. Yeah, so, and in the other narration, until the Ruh leaves. You know the last passage yeah, and in the other hadithith, the Prophet said that Allah opens his hands at night in order for those, or at the daytime in order for those who committed sins in the daytime to repent. And Allah accept, opens his hand at the daytime for those who committed sins at the night time and who committed sins at the nighttime. And this will continue until the sun comes from the west. And we know the story of the person who killed 99 people and he said I want to repent. And he went to an ignorant person. He told him no way that you can repent and he killed him. And he went to a scholar. He, he told him no way that you can repent and he killed him. And he went to a scholar. He said yeah, of course you can't repent, just do hijrah. And a people who you know, those who used to listen.

Speaker 1: 31:26

In surat al-baruj, allah told us about those who used to throw, throw Muslims in the fire. Yeah, they dug the trench, set fire in it, and they were throwing what? People in the fire, can you imagine that? And in one narration, they threw a lady with her, what With her? A child, infant. And when she was afraid to go into the fire, the baby spoke and told her mom, you are on the truth, just do it, okay. So Allah said about those. Can you imagine how evil those people are? Yeah, I don't want to draw the parallel because it might be provocative, of course, but imagine if someone were to say to Netanyahu yeah. Or to the Zionists who are committing genocide in Gaza yes, if you don't repent, allah will punish you. Someone will say what? Are you giving them a chance to repent? What is this? Allah said about those who used to throw people in the fire of hell, sorry, in the fire.

Speaker 1: 32:49

إِنَّ الَّذِينَ فَتَنُوا الْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَالْمُؤْمِنَاتِ. And then what? ث? Which means that Allah is giving hope to every single one. Yeah, and you can repent. And we know the narration that Firaun, he was putting what sand in the what in the mouth of Pharaoh? Jibreel was putting what Sand in the what In the mouth of Pharaoh? Yeah, jibril, sorry, jibril was putting the sand in the mouth of Pharaoh because he was afraid that he would repent, because he knows that if Pharaoh, who used to do all of these horrible things, who is the most tyrant individual in humanity, in the entire humanity, in the entire history of humanity, if he were to repent, allah will accept his repentance.

Speaker 2: 33:44

Ulema even talk about Shaytan.

Speaker 1: 33:46

if Shaytan were to repent Of course, but this is of course I mean okay, so we need to give people hope, yes, but Sheikh, one would argue.

Speaker 2: 33:56

And this is important.

Speaker 1: 33:57

So one would say just a minute, if I may of course so this is one direction. Yes, okay, this one direction. There is another important direction that I will mention, but after taking your, your question. But I don't want to lose it and I don't want the audience to.

Speaker 2: 34:15

Of course, of course. Yeah, I need to lose the track.

Speaker 2: 34:19

So what you've just explained is very powerful. That do not lose hope. Right? We always hear about zina is haram, gambling is haram, all of these things haram, but we don't really remind each other that despairing of the mercy of Allah is haram. Yeah, it may be worse than all of them. Absolutely yeah, because you're limiting Allah's names and attributes Exactly. It could be even a form of shirk. You are limiting the mercy of Allah. Yeah, so you're making a perfect being Allah's names and attributes to the highest degree possible, without any deficiency and flaw.

Speaker 2: 34:55

You're saying there's a flaw, that's what your basic thing is. We get that. So there is a key message of hope, especially when it comes to sin and to coming back to Allah. But one would argue here that when someone has despair or hopelessness or suicide ideation, they're not necessarily despairing because they have done something wrong or they're sinful, but it's because they have certain context and consequences, sorry circumstances. So their context and circumstances, whether internal or external, is shaping that perspective. So what they're saying is I'm finding it hard to find the hope, okay, I'm finding it hard to have a sense of meaning, I'm finding it hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. That is the issue as well. So what do we say from a Deenie perspective, from the principles of the Qur'an and Sunnah? How do we address those, that type of hopelessness or that type of despair?

Speaker 1: 35:59

okay, so I was focusing on those who despair because of sin, yes, and now you are talking to me that there is another type, which is true, okay of those who lose hope because of other challenges they face in their lives.

Speaker 2: 36:14

They can't see a solution, or lie at the end of the tunnel, or they have such a pain that they think it may be delusional, for sure, but the pain is so bad they're thinking the only solution is to possibly go down a particular route.

Speaker 1: 36:29

Okay, yes, very clear. See, I dealt with a number of people who wanted to commit suicide and in a few cases, you know how I was successful with a few cases with them. I don't know about the others. It doesn't mean that I was failing with the others. Sure, yeah, that I told them. But if you commit suicide, who told you that you will die? And I had to repeat this a number of times with all of them. They said what do you mean? I said when you commit suicide, yeah, who told you that you will die? He said, no, I will die, I will die. We saw it. I said, ah, this dying is just physical, but you are actually still living somewhere else. They said no. I said are you Muslim or not? And most of those whom I dealt with were Muslims. They said, yeah, I'm Muslim. I said so do you know that you are going to live after death? Then they start thinking so, killing yourself, you are not going to die.

Speaker 1: 38:05

And then one person I remember he called me from another country. He actually, I remember him very well. He was actually a professional person. Why he wanted to kill himself? Because he loved someone and she left him and she went back to him and she, okay, and then she just ran away with another person. So he was just feeling helpless, hopeless, and he said I said, man, are you going to kill yourself because of someone? He said no, no, no, no, no, don't misunderstand me. I said yeah, so explain to me. He said no, I am going to kill myself because I don't find Allah next to me. I said how he said, because I was asking Allah, because I loved this person. I want to marry her, I want her to be my partner, life partner. I said so. He said I've been doing dua, doing dua, doing dua, doing dua, going to the masjid and et cetera and praying, and I was planning to go. You know those people who are away from Allah. They think that I need to become religious. I'll go to Umrah and once I make dua, that means that Allah has to listen to me. Astaghfirullah. So I said to him okay, but if? Astaghfirullahaladzim? So I said to him Okay, but If, if, yeah, just about this point.

Speaker 1: 39:39

I did not go to the point about that. You are not going to die. I said what about if you find someone better? He said no, I will never. I said to him how do you know no, no, no, this is the one I loved. I said to him how do you know? No, no, no, this is the one I loved. I said ya, habibi, you might find someone better than her.

Speaker 1: 40:02

Then I said to him question was this the first one that you loved? He said no. Honestly speaking, I said so. The first one you came to know, you thought that she is the most beloved one to you. I said so the first one you came to know, you thought that she's the most beloved one to you. He said yeah. I said when you left, or the first one left you, you had a similar feeling. He said no, not to this degree. I said I agree, but at that time you never thought that you will have someone, that you will love her better than the first one. So he started to accept.

Speaker 1: 40:41

Then I moved to the second point, which is who told you that you are going to die? He said okay, I know, as Muslims, but what about if that is wrong? I said okay, excellent, as Muslims. But what about if that is wrong? I said okay, excellent. So now there is a possibility that you might die, yeah, and you might not die.

Speaker 1: 41:03

Agree, let us say that these are equal possibilities. That you might die, finish Once you commit suicide, vanished, no, more so, and so Not in this life, not in any other life. This is a possibility. And there is another possibility that you are still living, yeah. Now, the other possibility that you are now still living, it is a possibility 50-50. How are you going to live that life? He said I don't know. Yeah, I said don't tell me that. Okay, now we are discussing this possibility. Yes, what about if your life will be more miserable than your life now? Yeah, he was, you know, educated person miserable than your life now, yeah, he was, you know, educated person, mature person. So he was not moving back and forth, because so many people, when you discuss with them, they move back and forth from those two possibilities.

Speaker 1: 42:08

One possibility that, yeah, I might vanish, yeah, and they keep going back to that, no, no, there is a possibility, and there is also an equal possibility that you are not going might vanish. Yeah, and they keep going back to that. No, no, there is a possibility, and there is also an equal possibility that you are not going to vanish, hypothetically speaking. Hypothetically, yeah, of course you are, you don't know, presumably that. Or hypothetically, you don't know. So there is a possibility that you are going to vanish and there is equal possibility that you are not going to, and there is equal possibility that you are not going to Let us discuss this that you are not going to vanish. So how are you going to live? There is a possibility that you are going to suffer more. So committing suicide is not a solution, and you know this.

Speaker 2: 42:52

A few people said this Once we started to think about it that's what stopped us from committing suicide, because human beings, they are not going to choose a greater pain. Exactly, absolutely, and obviously in his case, because he seemed to have a shubha, a destructive doubt on this issue. So you gave him a good hypothetical scenario. But just for audience to really be clear, we're not saying that that hypothetical scenario, that those possibilities are real. We know for sure there's an Akhira. Just to be clear, because the way it was framed, exactly it was good, the way you dealt with him that way, because you empathized.

Speaker 2: 43:33

You showed emotional intelligence exactly you empathize and you, you, you walked in his shoes and you felt okay, how do I get him out of this? And you said look, there's a very high possibility that you may be in a greater pain. Yes, so your solution of removing this lesser pain uh to get is not working.

Speaker 1: 43:50

It's not going to work Absolutely. So there is a high possibility that you want to end this pain and you will end up suffering more and forever. So they start thinking, and sometimes you don't need people to say Well, I accept that, just leave it and go and think about it. Plant the seed. Yeah, plant the seed and Alhamdulillah, it worked. Yeah, so this is that's why Allah is angry At those who commit suicide, because they are assuming that there is what there is no second life and they're also assuming there's no hope.

Speaker 1: 44:34

Yes, but I mean, they are going against many Islamic principles. Yes, absolutely Many aqidah principles yes, as we mentioned that Allah Jalla'ala prohibited them. Allah Jalla'ala is the one who gave life. Aqidah principles yes, as we mentioned that Allah Allah Prohibited them. Allah, allah, allah Is the one who gave life. Allah, allah Is the one who takes life. Also, they go against A very important principle. Who told you that you will be Better off? Who told you that you will remove your pain? Maybe you will have Worse pain. This is quite powerful Because that you will remove your pain.

Speaker 2: 45:07

Maybe you will have worse pain. This is quite powerful because what it shows from a hikmah perspective, that the extreme prohibition of suicide and the fact that there is a severe punishment kind of also indicates that if you are patient and you submit to these principles and to the will of Allah and all of these things that there is going to be, there is hope and you're going to find hope, even if it's not in the dunya, in the akhirah, exactly Because the.

Speaker 2: 45:35

Prophet said, the most miserable person in the dunya, who suffered the most, and he's destined for Jannah. He'll be dipped in the paradise for a split moment and he'll be asked did you ever suffer? He'll say, wallahi, I have never suffered. Exactly so, when you see it with these. But what you've done, sheikh, because you've answered all the questions, yeah, and the reason you've done it? Because it's so powerful you have shown that if we have the correct meaning, we have the correct understanding of purpose behind these things yes, it's, it's the solution, and we have to remind people of the meaning and the purpose behind life, behind these situations, and give them a macro approach because some people just see only beyond their nose yes and obviously we're not going to condemn them for that per se, especially in the mentoring process, because we have to have empathy and understand who that person is.

Speaker 2: 46:25

Definitely and everyone needs different approaches and you did that very well with this person because you said he's professional, he's smart and the way you dealt with him was based on the balance of probability so it would work with him.

Speaker 1: 46:35

You need to use logic with him, not just to say listen, habibi, it is haram, allah will punish you like this, etc.

Speaker 2: 46:42

So with others, it would be. Maybe they need more of an emotional, spiritual approach. That, of course, that Allah has your back when you go to Jannah, there will be no pain at all and it's as if nothing ever happened.

Speaker 1: 46:51

Okay, good, yes, that's very good and see, I want to say that, see why non-Muslims yeah, suicide rate within non-Muslims is much higher than it is with Muslims. Yeah, see, rate within non-Muslims is much higher than it is with Muslims. See, because of hope, etc. But there is one important point you mentioned it, but I want to emphasize it and this is also linked to what we see in Gaza. The people of Gaza, despite, I think, the suffering that they are going through now have not been experienced by a group of Gaza, despite, I think, the suffering that they are going through now have not been experienced by a group of people. Maybe in history, maybe in history Allah knows, maybe, of course, the people of the trench, maybe more, but I mean in the modern history, yeah, because people, even, even, even, even they used to, and they are still doing that they bomb their tents and they are burned alive. Yeah, so the people of the trench were thrown in the fire and similar thing is happening to some people in Gaza. So it is unbelievable. Despite this, they say Alhamdulillah, yeah, and despite this, they are resisting. They said we will live here and we will die here, we don't mind. Yeah, despite this, they have hope Because, see, the biggest problem in the world, which is connected to disbelief in Allah, is to disbelieve in Akhirah.

Speaker 1: 48:39

That's why Allah Jalla wa Ala, always talking about believing in Allah and what? The Day of resurrection? Yes, yes, alif la min dhalika, al-kitabu la ra'iba fi yudan li al-muttaqeena, al-ladhina yu'minuna bil-ghaybi yuqimuna as-salatu wa-min ma-razakna wa-min yunfiqoon wa-ladhina yu. They believe in what In the Akhirah. Always, allah is talking about believing in Him and believing in what In Akhirah.

Speaker 1: 49:14

Why and why did the Prophet say remember death a lot? Who on earth say remember death? Because the Prophet says remembering death strikes. The Prophet says remembering death strikes the balance in your life. If you are hopeless. Yeah, the person is hopeless, like the people of Gaza. Now, yeah, imagine, you know, last week, a person, all his six children. They were not young, they were, you know, the youngest of them is 18. They were killed in front of his eyes. Can you imagine this? All of his children, six of them. Yeah, can you imagine For him? Why does he need to live after that? After all of these years, years he was looking after them and when they became very beautiful, very promising children, all of a sudden they were killed. Can you imagine this amount of pain, let alone. He lost his house, he lost his father, he lost, etc. So if we measure things according to dunya, we will lose hope.

Speaker 2: 50:34

Yes.

Speaker 1: 50:36

If we measure things, yes, in the right measurement, which is what this dunya is one second, maybe a split second compared to what Compared to the akhira, yeah, then people will say, yes, I'm suffering here, but there I'm not going to suffer, I will enjoy it, but there I'm not going to suffer, I will enjoy it. In fact, as you said in the hadith of Sahih Muslim, if the person is dipped one second, split second, in Jannah, he will forget all types of challenges, pain, suffering that he or she went through in the dunya. So this concept gives anyone hope no matter, yes, or irrespective of the pain, the challenges, the suffering, the killing that you are going through, yes, just by once you die. If you die as a shaheed, immediately you will go to Jannah. Yeah, and that's why even the Prophet said no one would like to.

Speaker 1: 51:59

Once he dies, he doesn't want to come to dunya, except for shaheed, because of the amount of reward. Yes, he said, ya Allah, let me go again to dunya, except for shaheed, because of the amount of reward. Yes, he said, ya Allah, let me go again to dunya and let me suffer again and let me be killed, because then you will give me another reward. Yeah, he would like to this to happen. So and see now, because of the hegemony of the western philosophy that is about individualism, enjoyment, yeah, what you see, what you touch. Yes, there is no akhira in their equation. Yes, yes, that's why this mental illness is, and it promotes hope, it promotes the love of the dunya, hopelessness. They don't see the akhirah, they don't see hope.

Speaker 2: 52:51

So, sheikh, what's important then is for a Muslim who is suffering this, and even for a non-Muslim as well, and they're not realizing that the ultimate purpose of life is to worship Allah, to love Allah, to obey Allah, that there's an Akhira, that there's meaning behind pain and suffering, and that meaning, if you give it, if you have the correct meaning, can basically help you through that pain, and so on and so forth. Based on the various principles and the hadith and the ayat that we just mentioned, what would be an approach to Muslims, and even maybe non-Muslims, in reminding them about the meaning and purpose, because a lot of people who, just like the example that you gave, that person was suicidal, has suicidal thoughts you reminded him about. Look, there are consequences, there is an akhira, and so on and so forth. What would be the approach from a mentoring perspective, from a community perspective with these individuals? Do we just merely remind them about their purpose in life, remind them about the akhira? What's the approach.

Speaker 1: 53:55

Yeah, see, okay, excellent. See, we need different types and different approaches. One approach will not resolve the problem. Okay, why? Human beings are the human being is the physical body, the intellectual body and the emotional side Isn't it?

Speaker 1: 54:22

So we need something physical, we need something emotional, we need something intellectual, we need something emotional we need something intellectual Very interesting, yes, and limiting it to one direction, which is unfortunately the non-Islamic point of view, is not going to work. So we need what we need all, of course, the emotional side along with the intellectual side, they play a major role. Yeah, and, believe me, many of those brothers I dealt with, many brothers and sisters you know one time you wouldn't believe it ya Hamza, ya Habibi, one, one brother. Again, I'm saying Habibi, like what I said to Dillies, this is innocent Habibi.

Speaker 2: 55:14

Yes, okay, well, you know, hopefully you love me. Yeah, of course.

Speaker 1: 55:17

Yeah, I love you too, one, one young wallahi. I remember him. He had many, you know, psychological problems, and not psychological emotional problems, emotional problems, and he was very low and he started to be suicidal. Yeah, I know him very well. Do you know that I treated his problem with one hug? Oh, yes, wallahi. Yeah, I know him very well. Do you know that I treated his problem with one hug, yes, wallah.

Speaker 2: 55:55

Yeah, until he was about to believe that I am a peer sub also but this is very powerful.

Speaker 1: 56:04

He said, you know, sheikh, seriously, after you hugged me, yeah, I felt so much relaxed. I said, yeah, because my heart has many of those people, subhanallah. Their, their emotional hunger, yeah, leads them to despair, despair, and sometimes leads them to doing something crazy because they don't know what is the answer for their emotional hunger. Yeah, it's like you know, I was talking to a brother yesterday. You know all our women who ask for divorce. They don't really want divorce, they don't want to end the marriage. We need to understand this Because if we understand it, then we would say, yeah, she doesn't want to give her. No, sometimes divorce is seeking attention.

Speaker 2: 57:05

Or cry for help, or cry for help, or cry for help.

Speaker 1: 57:09

Or she is disturbed. She just want to do something crazy. She doesn't know what is it, but let me do that.

Speaker 2: 57:17

By the way, western secular marriage therapists say the same thing Really yeah, subhanallah.

Speaker 1: 57:23

Same thing with those brothers.

Speaker 2: 57:24

They say something very similar.

Speaker 1: 57:26

Yeah, those brothers who have these problems Sometimes. That's why I'll tell you a secret. You know those brothers and sisters that when they call me for Psychological problems, mental problems, problems with their parents, especially if they are young yeah, if they are young. Or sometimes you know, some of those intellectual problems that are actually not intellectual, they are a reflection of another problem I don't answer them over the phone. What do I do? What do you think I do?

Speaker 2: 58:15

You meet them.

Speaker 1: 58:16

Exactly.

Speaker 2: 58:16

Of course it's a different dynamic, sheikh, exactly. So this is very important what you've said. So, to summarize what you're saying here on this issue, so people get clear, they're clear about what you're saying we, we need, there's many approaches because everyone's different. You said we have a body, we have an intellect, we have emotions emotional, spiritual. For some people, the emphasis may be the emotional, exactly. For other people, maybe the intellectual, yes, other people maybe the physical right because it could be just eating the right foods gives you raha yeah yeah, like the person, something he used to have this thing called talbina.

Speaker 2: 58:48

Yeah, yeah, and it soothes his soul, right. Yeah, so when you it's so, islam is very dynamic that way, which echoes, you know even, what some modern trends in medicine are saying. Yeah, so when we see so, we individualize the problem. Who is the problem? Obviously, if it's a genuine medical issue, then we leave it to the experts. But the experts would also say focus on your community and your tradition, islam, purpose, meaning, etc. But what you're saying is we have to understand what is the main issue, and it might be a little bit intellectual, some emotional, exactly. So we have to solve those problems and then introduce the meaning and purpose in that, so they are more grounded.

Speaker 1: 59:26

Yes, okay, and what I want to emphasize on is that it is not always an intellectual problem. It's usually not Sheikh.

Speaker 2: 59:36

Even when in.

Speaker 1: 59:38

Lighthouse Mentoring with.

Speaker 2: 59:39

Shubhahat, it's usually 80% emotional. Yeah, exactly Even when they start with intellectual. Exactly when you unpack it slowly and you're sincere with them and you talk to them sincerely, you'll realize 80-90% is something else.

Speaker 1: 59:51

Yes, yes, absolutely. And, by the way, I'm stressing on this because many people don't think they believe no, it is an intellectual issue. No, ya habibi, it is not an intellectual issue, as you said, and I want you are experts in this field, I want people to listen to you that 80-90% they are not intellectual issues and I'm telling you most of the problems that I dealt with. Yes, they came with some intellectual shubuhaat, but the way I dealt with it is not purely intellectual and, alhamdulillah, we managed to solve it. Yeah, one time a brother saw me in the in the train and I was sitting here. He was sitting in front of me. He looked at me and then he came to me and he said are you an Imam? I said yes, young brother. I said yes. He said can I talk to you? I said yeah, of course you can talk to me. And he said, yeah, I need some time. I said yeah, subhanallah.

Speaker 1: 1:01:00

I was stopping in the next station. I said can you come with me in that? He said yes, I can come. So I spoke to him. I told him that listen, I want you. Now you are. You told me your problem and I'm like your GP, you listen to me. He said of course I'll listen to you.

Speaker 1: 1:01:20

I said read Quran every day loudly for 20 minutes. I asked him do you know how to read Quran? He said I know how to read Quran. I said read. Yes. I gave him my number. I said believe me, if after one month your problem continues, you can say and come. You can come and say you are a liar, because I tried this, which is reading Quran everyday loudly for 20 minutes and it didn't work. And with number of people? Yeah, they said Sheikh Ajeep, ajeep wallahi.

Speaker 1: 1:01:58

After two weeks I started to feel the difference in my life just by what? Reading Quran loudly, yeah. So these doubts and these, these doubts that lead people to be hopeless, they are not intellectuals, they are a mixture between intellectual, mainly emotional, and some other issues. And, as I said, we need to teach people that there is a bigger picture. Bigger picture, by the way, in two sides in the Akhira, but also in the Dunya, but also in the dunya, but also in the dunya, because, like this person who loved this one and she left him, I told him Ya, habibi, if you were making dua to Allah Jalla wa Ala, allah Jalla wa Ala knows that this lady is not the best for you.

Speaker 1: 1:03:04

There is another, better lady for her for you, there is another better lady for her for you. And simply, the first lady that you came across, she left you and now you find, according to you, better lady. So this lady, you feel pain now, but when you find someone better than her, you will say, oh Alhamdulillah, I did not get married to the first lady or the second lady. Now I found a better lady. A micro perspective. We always, we are unable to understand the wisdom of Allah, jalla Ala, and the bigger picture.

Speaker 2: 1:03:55

Recently there was one brother. He was facing some fitna calamity problems and just let me know if this was the correct approach. Obviously he wasn't suicidal, but he was contextually depressed, if you like. And I said Muslims, by default, should seek the hikmah behind things and the khair behind things, the goodness behind things, because if Allah has chosen something for you, no one could choose anything else. Exactly yes, so you should now understand that as a default position and then try and find okay, what is the hikmah for me, what is the goodness for me, for my development, for my growth, for my akhira, for my understanding? So this approach helps people. It's not necessarily something that is there to destroy you. It's the best thing for you, but now you need to seek that.

Speaker 1: 1:04:44

Where is the wisdom? Where is the goodness? Now, here I might disagree with you, hamza, if you allow me. You don't need to understand the wisdom, because you might not understand it, but you know there is one, because Allah is Al-Hakim, definitely, but you might not understand it, you might not see it Agreed, but the process of trying to find it, because Allah is Al-Hakim and he is Al-Bard, the source of the goodness.

Speaker 2: 1:05:12

Is that a hopeful journey, or?

Speaker 1: 1:05:14

is that going to be? No, I don't see that. Okay, I don't see that. No, you should say. You should say that Allah, allah, allah. You should say that Allah Jalla wa'ala inna lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un. Allahumma ajurni fi musibatu wa khulifna khayran minha. We belong to Allah and we are going to return to Allah. Oh, allah, give me the reward of this musibah and give me better than this musibah. And Allah Jalla wa'ala says in the Quran yes, وَلَا نَبْلُوَنَّكُمْ says in the Quran yes, just to say we belong to Allah and we will go back to Allah. And this is our advice. And have a trust that Allah will give you something better, either in the dunya or in the akhira. Yes, okay, if you don't see it in the dunya, yeah, because some people don't see it, they can't. Yeah, for example, this person who wants to get married to this lady. He said I said there is a wisdom behind this. He said I can't see the wisdom. I said, yeah, you will not see the wisdom, that's true.

Speaker 1: 1:06:36

I said yeah, for example, maybe you will get married to her and she will cheat on you. What do you think If you get married to her and she cheated on you? Will you be happy? He said no, she was a. I said you don't know the future and I told him she cheated on you. He said no, she was a good lady. I said you see, if she was a good lady, she would not run away with another man. So I said if she was a good lady, she would not run away. She would not run away with another man. So imagine that you got married to her and then she cheated on you absolutely ok.

Speaker 2: 1:07:15

That's a very good pushback, sheikh, because it it could be the case that you never discover the khair behind it, in the dunya or the hikmah, but because we know everything that Allah chooses for us is good, we will find the reward in the akhirah and we submit to that a trust in Allah.

Speaker 1: 1:07:30

That's why Allah says so.

Speaker 2: 1:07:31

The trust in Allah is more important in this case than trying to find some dunya hikmah.

Speaker 1: 1:07:36

Okay, exactly this is my point, because if you keep trying, you might not see so many things, of course, because we don't have the whole picture Exactly. Allah Jalla wa Ala said that people, because of their sins, rain will not fall on them. And then Allah Jalla wa Ala said وَلَوْ لَا الْبَهَاءِمْ لَمْ يُنطَرُوا. Sometimes you say why Allah Jalla wa Ala is giving grain to those disbelievers. Allah looks at everything. Maybe there is an animal, yeah, an animal. Allah wants to show mercy to that animal. So we don't know. وَاللَّهُ يَعْلَمُ, وَأَنْتُمْ لَا تَعْلَمُونَ. And see, allah knows and you don't know. And I always say to the brothers yes, always rely on Allah, train yourself to have trust in Allah. Yeah, and say we belong to Allah and we will go back to yes, and don't try to think of the wisdom, don't try to think of the materialistic outcome. Yeah, because, train yourself, Because the more you think of what possible is the hikmah, you will go crazy, believe me, yes.

Speaker 2: 1:09:04

But what if you ask the question what is it that Allah wants from me? Spiritually Like?

Speaker 1: 1:09:13

there's a test for example.

Speaker 2: 1:09:14

You know life is a test. Yeah, allah, for example, could test you with becoming a millionaire, or he could test you with poverty. Yes, then you could ask yourself the question in this particular test, whether it's a death in the family, whether it particular test, whether it's a death in the family, whether it's wealth, whether it's anything, what does Allah want from me and, if I react to it appropriately, what does he want to evoke within me Stronger iman, develop more patience? Can we explore that? We're not saying this is exactly what Allah wants, but isn't that a hopeful strategy? Uthoshef.

Speaker 1: 1:09:46

That is what Allah commands me to do, not. What is the hikmah out of what Allah did to me? Okay, what Allah commanded me to do. So, allah, all of a sudden I became a millionaire, as you said. So what Allah wants out of me? I should not say what is the wisdom behind this, why Allah testing me in this way, etc. You can't know, but that's why, when that companion came to the Prophet peace be upon him- and said when is the day of paradise?

Speaker 1: 1:10:22

When is the day of resurrection the Prophet? Peace be upon him. This is a relative question If you know that it is tomorrow or after 1,000 years. The question is the Prophet guided him to what? To the fruitful side of the question, which is مَدَى أَعْدَ التَّلَاوَةِ, what did you prepare for Akhirah? So Allah Jalla Ala made me rich, or Allah Jalla Ala afflicted me with cancer, or Allah Jalla Ala took my children, or Allah Jalla Ala, I am living in Gaza and I'm facing all of this. What does Allah Jalla Ala want from me? So, first of all, if it is sharr to me, something bad to me, I need to show sabr. Yeah, and, by the way, there is a proactive sabr and there is a passive sabr, active sabr and passive sabr, passive sabr okay.

Speaker 1: 1:11:28

I lost one of my children. What can I do? Yes, this Quran said this kind of sabr. Yeah, you might get some reward and some of your sins will be definitely because of the pain will be removed. Yes, yes, as the Prophet said مَا يُصِيبُ الْمُؤْمِنِ مِنْ أَلَمٍ, وَلَا وَصَبٍ حَتَّى الشَّوْكَ يُشَاكَ Even the throne.

Speaker 1: 1:11:56

But the active sabr is to say سُبْحَانَ اللَّهِ, وَإِنَّا إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ. Ya Allah, I accept your qadr. Ya Allah, I accept your qadr. Your reward will increase dramatically. Yeah, that's why Allah says وَلَا نَبْلُوَنَّكُمْ بِشَيْءٍ مِنَ الْقَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ. And this is the act of sabr. Yes, so Allah will give them reward. So I advise all brothers you know that I had cancer a few years ago and Alhamdulillah I managed to. Okay, but still now I believe that I could have done better, sometimes because of the pain, etc.

Speaker 1: 1:12:49

You live in that box. Don't live in the box of pain and the box of calamity. You will go crazy and you might have the passive sabr. No, come out of that box to what? To have the active sabr, which gives you more reward and wallahi. Yes, you might come to a point you are enjoying what? Enjoying the calamity, because you know that Allah Jalla wa'ala caused this calamity to befall you and you know that Allah Jalla wa'ala said the most tested people are the prophets, and then the best and the best, and Allah, as the Prophet said that Allah will keep testing you pain. You will have an emotional, spiritual strength that will make you enjoy the pain for the sake of allah.

Speaker 2: 1:14:03

So shah, you told me a story.

Speaker 1: 1:14:05

And this, yes, as the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said, this doesn't tap in, except to what? To the believers. Yes, the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said Amazing. In the situation of the believer, if he was afflicted by something good, he would be thankful. Allah will give him more. If he was afflicted by a moseeba, he will be what Patient? He will be thankful. Allah will give him more. If he was afflicted by a moseeba, he will be what Patient? He will be patient. Allah will reward him. وَلَا يَكُونُ ذَلِكَ إِلَّا لِلْمُؤْمِنِ no one else will. What Will receive that? Subhanallah. And this is what. This is the halawa for Iman. Of course we need the sweetness of Iman. We need to train ourselves to get into that. It will not happen all of the time, but the person has to train himself, has to remind himself, emotionally, spiritually, to get into that level. This is connected to.

Speaker 2: 1:14:57

we've got maybe one more question, but before we get into that, I remember when we were doing the visionaries, you were talking about your experience with cancer and how looking back it helped you to have maybe a wider understanding for Rahmah, for even the non-Muslims yes.

Speaker 2: 1:15:15

Other dimensions in my life yes other dimension in life, so connected to what I said previously. Can we use other people's pain and how they learned from it and how they grew, and even pain that you've had in the past and you knew what it did for you, in a positive way? Can we use that as kind of reference points to say, okay, I have something else. I don't know where the khair is, I don't know where the hikmah is, but because look at all of these believers, they've faced similar things. Look how they grew, or look how they developed, or look what happened and I faced something else of pain in the past and look where Allah has taken me now. Can we use other people's experiences and your own past experiences to give a little bit more hope to trying to find another meaning as well, rather than just pure tawakkul?

Speaker 1: 1:16:05

Obviously yes, yes, yes. You could do yes, yes, yes, yes, of course.

Speaker 2: 1:16:09

For example you know, even in my life, you know, there've been some painful moments, humiliation moments, and I now wish, as if I experienced that a thousand times, because what it did for me was beyond belief. Yes, yes so you could do that.

Speaker 1: 1:16:24

Of course, okay, alhamdulillah, of course, okay, of course, of course, and that's a helpful strategy.

Speaker 2: 1:16:28

Of course, this is a helpful strategy, because Allah does that with the Prophet.

Speaker 1: 1:16:32

Yes.

Speaker 2: 1:16:32

You know you were misguided and we guided you and you were an orphan, and so on and so forth. So Allah is giving the correct meaning to the past To get him to transcend that.

Speaker 1: 1:16:43

Definitely, okay, alhamdulillah, definitely. And see, in this life, in this life, I'm trying to collect the rules of life, a book called the Rules of Life. There are certain rules that govern this life. One of them is that there is no pure sharr. Every evil, there is a khair behind it. There is no absolute evil. There is no absolute evil. Yes, this is the wisdom of Allah. There is no absolute evil behind any evil, but it depends on you. Yes, if you want to discover it, you can discover it, if you can look at it. That this is. Yes, if you want to discover it, you can discover it, if you can look at it, that this is a test from Allah in order to elevate me, to prepare me for something else.

Speaker 1: 1:17:35

So, for example, the Ummah now is going through these difficulties and these challenges. Why, ya Allah, ya Allah, muslims are being killed in Palestine? Now we might have a war between India and Pakistan. Look at Muslims in Kashmir and what is happening to them. Ya Allah, look at Muslims and some people they enjoy, especially in dua. You know talking about, you know pain, pain, pain, pain.

Speaker 1: 1:18:03

Yeah, yes, allah Jalla Ala is preparing this Ummah for leadership, yes, and Allah Jalla Ala wants to tell them that the price of leadership is very high. Yeah, and you need to go through all of this, and this is what Yusuf Alayhi salam yeah, he was imprisoned. Look, I give the khutbas Because you know. So many people now are saying look at when Allah is going to accept our dua for the people of Gaza. Yeah, and this is another problem. We measure things according to what? To dunya perspective. Yes, I mean to dunya. Although we believe in akhira, we think that I made dua today. Ya Allah, ya Allah, ya Allah, give victory to people of Gaza. I will sleep next time the give victory to people of Gaza. I will sleep Next time the problem of the people of Gaza is solved. We think like this yeah, now, yusuf alayhi salam, just an example.

Speaker 1: 1:19:17

There are so many examples. Yusuf alayhi salam, when did he see the dream that he will become a leader and like a king? When he was young? Yes, yes, yeah, but in the right to a had a share of co-cover. The the scholar said that he was nine, ten, something like this. And when he saw the actuality of his dream?

Speaker 1: 1:19:40

years later, yeah, at least a twenty something years later, at least 20 something years later at least. Yeah, because he became. He lived in the he you know, if you calculate it a cool calculation then he was thrown in the well water, well, and then he was picked up and then he was living in the palace and then he became like an adult so he's now 18.

Speaker 1: 1:20:07

Yes, okay. And then he had the problem of Imraat al-Aziz. Yes, and then he stayed in the prison for nine years and then, so now he is around 30. Yes, so he's now around 30. And then the king saw what the dream. For seven years they will see famine. Yeah, qala tazra'una sab'a sinina da'aban. Okay, so, and according to one interpretation, both happened Seven years of famine, seven years of wealth. So this is 14 years plus 30 years. So we are talking about 40 something. Yes, mid-40s. Yes, so at least 30 years for the dream, although the dream of a prophet is true. So that Ayyub.

Speaker 1: 1:21:10

As for the dream, although the dream of a prophet is true to, so that some scholars said the answer he was answered his dua after 14 years, and some scholars said he handled the pain for 14 years and then he made the dua yes, okay. Allah says what is the average life? The Prophet said yeah, we live for 60, 70. Okay, around that. So it means that 60 years is the average time. Okay, maybe you cut from it. Is the childhood, 50, 60 years? Is that what? The time of test? So don't think that you will make the door next day. Your problem will be solved. Yeah, so, and because the reward is huge, the reward is Akhirah, so that as well, understanding that is very important. So, and we see before with Iman, we need some tools to help people To handle the pain.

Speaker 2: 1:22:29

Yes, so that's the last question. So let's focus on this last question. So how does Cultivating a kind of sincere Relation with Allah, how does learning Some of these tools from the Quran and the Sunnah, help those individuals who have suicide ideation or a sense of hopelessness and despair? Okay, this is very critical. Okay, so, because you know, some of these ideas are very kind of abstract sometimes. So say, we are speaking to person X, we have Abdullah here. Yeah, abdullah is going through some type of pain.

Speaker 2: 1:23:03

It may be suicide ideation, or hopelessness or despair. It may be a combination of intellectual, emotional and physical. Yeah, focusing on cultivating relation with Allah, subhanahu wa ta'ala, and also focusing on the principles and the deen and the relation with Allah as an antidote to despair and hopelessness. What?

Speaker 1: 1:23:24

do we say to this person Okay, we say a number of things, we say you need to work on a number of things. Yeah, habibi, physical, intellectual, emotional, so physical, you need to start praying. Yeah, I'll give you a simple example Hamza Wudu. Yeah, does it make you happy or not when you in the early in the morning, when you face wash your face, does it make you happy or not?

Speaker 2: 1:23:51

And it wakes you up as well. Wakes you up. No, no, you feel good.

Speaker 1: 1:23:55

You know, search it, google it. What is it Diving? What is it Influx? Or yeah, yeah, there is a video where a person says why divers, this is diving. What is it? Call it a phenomenon or something. When that diving person hits with his forehead, water, that gives him sense of happiness and the dopamine.

Speaker 1: 1:24:22

And he said in the video and he was as if he was wall, he was as if he was Wallahi, as if he was making Wudu, wudu, yeah, washing his face like this. Okay, now, when I had cancer, I used to In the morning, early in the morning. Yeah, go to Fajr prayer. I pass by Some of the Non-Muslims. They are like this John, how are you, I'm fine, I go walk. Walk helps you to.

Speaker 1: 1:24:57

Yes or no. Okay, walking it's changing the atmosphere. I say to the brothers who are depressed, why you imprison yourself? You are adding to your problem. Just go outside Seeing the sunrise, seeing the sunrise, seeing people, yes, when you say to people, and people respond by when a person says we were taught by Sharia to say goodness. So even if you see an ill person, you might say to some, maybe you are not feeling, but you will be all right. That gives you hope. All of this is not fallacy. It's true, Of course, yes or no. So the physical practices of Islam will help the person to feel happy, because it is not all just intellectual or spiritual, even physical. And we all know that when you make sujood, yes, and you put this on earth, that gives you a sense of happiness. Yeah, and many people who are unable to make sujood yes, and they are good people because of illness or because of these problems, they say wallahi, we wish to make sujood. Yeah, wallahi, we wish to make sujood. So this is one tool, the physical side.

Speaker 2: 1:26:27

So we say to them and that includes food, good food as well.

Speaker 1: 1:26:30

Exactly, exactly All of these things. The Prophet said yes, أَفْشُ السَّلَامُ وَأَطْعَمُ الطَّعَامُ وَصِلُوا الْأَرْحَامُ. Maintaining the ties of kinship, the Prophet said visiting the ill person. When you visit the ill person, make dua. The Prophet said the person who is visiting the ill person, he is walking in Jannah picking up the fruits of Jannah. In the other hadith, 100,000 angels are making dua for him. By just what? Visiting the sick person? This is an element that will give the person hope when you see people around you. That's why don't isolate yourself from the Muslim community, from your brothers and sisters. If you are not happy with some, you will be happy with others.

Speaker 2: 1:27:21

And the community must also understand this to find those people who isolate themselves.

Speaker 1: 1:27:24

Definitely, definitely, definitely, but, but for whatever reason, if you, the community, did not find you, you go and find them. You go and find them. That's why we always say live around the masjid. Yes, this will help you, this will help your family, et cetera, et cetera. So this is one. There is the intellectual side, yes, the intellectual side. Always remind yourself about the purpose of this life. This life is a temporary period of time. Yeah, there is also the spiritual angle, which is what that you need to do some spiritual activities. Salah is a spiritual activity, although sometimes I have reservation about the word spiritual. Salah is a spiritual activity, although sometimes I have reservation about the word spiritual. But salah is a spiritual activity Worship. That's why Allah said no, especially salah. وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلَاةِ وَإِنَّهَا لَكَبِيرَةٌ إِلَّا عَلَى الْخَاشِ. Ibn Abbas, he was traveling. He heard the news that his brother passed away.

Speaker 2: 1:28:31

He went down from his camel prayed two rak'ah.

Speaker 1: 1:28:33

Yeah, these are helpful tools. Okay, dhikr of Allah Jalla wa'ala, yes, not to be sad, smile, smile. I say to people. First force yourself to smile. No, I can't Force it. Force, force yourself to smile. Okay, as you say, I learned it from you. Fake it until you make it, until you make it.

Speaker 2: 1:28:59

Yeah, I think there was a study when they put a pen in someone's mouth to force a smile, it actually made them more happier. It's like it's like prior perceptual psychology, something like that. It's like, if you want to be energetic, you're about to give very powerful talk and you put yourself in that state by going, yes, something happens to you yes, yeah definitely yeah definitely physical activities.

Speaker 2: 1:29:23

That's why it's important language as well share because it connected to the emotional, because the Prophet, peace be upon him. In the Sahih Hadith he said don't say my soul has been wicked.

Speaker 1: 1:29:33

Yeah, say it has faulted, yes, yes, and there's so many.

Speaker 2: 1:29:36

It's interesting the language, the framing in the Quran, the positive words don't condemn yourself Exactly. Because language, sometimes even the way you speak, has an impact on you. Yeah, you may not even mean it. Yes, you may just use the right language, because language would affect you.

Speaker 1: 1:29:53

Yes, yeah, definitely, definitely. When the Prophet visited a person and he was having high fever, yes, he said. And the person? He said no, no, no, no, I'm sick. He said it's up to you, and then the person after that passed away. So positivity is part of it. That's why, by the way, sadness is not something that is praised in the Quran. In fact, sadness is something that is praised in the Quran. In fact, sadness is something that is condemned in the Quran.

Speaker 1: 1:30:29

إِنَّمَا النَّجْوَى مِنَ الشَّيْطَانِ, لِيَحْزِنَ الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا نَجْوَى means whispering. It is from Shaytan in order to make believers not happy. لَا تَحْزَنْ إِنَّ اللَّهَ مَعَن. Don't be sad, okay. Ibn Al-Qayyim said sadness is not praised worthy. Yeah, sadness is from shaitan, and once you are sad, you become subhanallah, paralyzed. You cannot think. You need hope. And let me just conclude by this story, if I may say Of course, I know it is, maybe it just came to my mind.

Speaker 1: 1:31:12

There is a story, a film, called Jacob the Liar. There is a film If you Google it, you will find it Jacob the Liar. What is the story of this film? They said that you know the Nazis when they were taking the Jewish people and they were imprisoning them and putting them in concentration camps. After some time, in one of the camps, the Jewish people lost hope as a result of this. They were not looking after themselves, not getting married, and they were looking after themselves, not getting married, and they were. So they killed themselves by themselves.

Speaker 1: 1:31:49

Jacob the liar yeah, he invented a lie. He started to spread a rumor that he managed to what? To listen to the conversation between the German and the you know the other powers. And he said I came to know that Germans are going to be defeated in a matter of few months because I listened to the secret conversation through satellite, through radios, the radio signal, et cetera. They said and they said this is a true story, allah, alam, but the film is there. Yeah, they said, the people there started to have hope and they started to clean themselves, get married, to have children, etc. That's why Allah says in the Quran Allah doesn't want us to lose hope as individuals and as an Ummah.

Speaker 1: 1:32:55

Allah said you are superior as far as you are. What Believers, the person you know, even on an individual, simple level, simple level. You know, okay, I have so many examples and that those examples will help in success. One time recently, a few months ago, you know East London Mosque, they arranged this five kilometers run. Yeah, I came to know about it. I was not ready. Yeah, I came to know about it I was not ready. Yeah, I did not train for it, but I want to do it. So the brothers told me it is the day after tomorrow. Oh, no, really. So I said let me go and challenge myself and do it. Yeah, I was well every time I said I want to write the success story behind this running.

Speaker 1: 1:33:50

So, first of all, I went with a clear vision that my vision is not to be one of the top 20, 30 hundred. My vision clear, and it is what it is, a vision that I can achieve, which is to run all of it without stopping, without having a rest, that's all. To complete it, without what? Having a rest. So, have specific vision and it should be what? Reasonable? Yeah, a person like me, you know, who was not training, and then I want to be the winner. Impossible. So have what? A reasonable vision. And that's why they say the vision has to be smart. Yes, okay, then have a group of people to encourage you. So we had a few people to encourage me around me. And because, oh, sheikh, sheikh, sheikh, yeah, and some of them were you know, sheikh, and some of them say come on, sheikh, are you going to do it? So there are different feelings that are pushing you OK. And the second thing is another point, which is you know they did it very well.

Speaker 1: 1:35:12

After one kilometer they have a sign. After two kilometers they have another sign after. So I used to what To say to myself? I will not stop unless I get into two kilometers. Yeah, so I was running, running, running by almost in the first kilometer, I was so tired. I saw the sign of one kilometer, I said I can do it. Yeah, I gave myself what Hope I can do it.

Speaker 1: 1:35:44

When I was running, running, running got into two kilometers, I said man, almost half of the is done. Yeah, keep going, keep going, yes. So now you are giving yourself hope. And it is five kilometers, it is not 50. Because if it is 50, I would say it is very far.

Speaker 1: 1:36:10

I can't do it. So I will lose hope. I will not even complete five. Did you get that? Yes, but because five is reasonable and there is hope to achieve it, yes, you will achieve it. Hope to achieve it, yes, you will achieve it. So, and then I said, oh, let me just do it. Okay, I completed the three. I said, now it is more than half. Also, you need to what? To celebrate achievements, yeah, so I done three. Oh, I can do it. To give yourself booster. So you need to achieve your sorry, you need to celebrate your achievements, okay, and you need to have reasonable hope. If you don't have hope, you will not achieve five kilometers, you will not achieve two kilometers. And this is what I say to our brothers and sisters Always have hope and alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, our deen is a deen of hope and we all know, we all know when the Prophet, you know, in Mecca, when the companions came to him, khabbab ibn al-Arat, and said, ya Rasulallah, look what they do to us.

Speaker 1: 1:37:31

Khabbab ibn al-Arat, they used to throw him on the hot coal. Yeah, he used to smell his flesh. When, you know, cooked, yeah, they came. Ya Rasulullah, look at us. Because the Prophet is treating leaders. He didn't say, oh, yeah, I, you know, I feel sorry for you and I sympathize with you. He is treating leaders, he is building leaders. The ummah we, as an ummah, were created to lead, not to be led, and the Prophet trained us to lead, not to be led. So the Prophet said okay, so what? Yeah, and then he gave them hope Wallahi, allah will establish this deen until a lady will travel alone from Hadhramaut to Salah. This is one example. We have the other example when the Prophet migrated from Mecca to Medina and Suraqa was chasing the Prophet and then his horse was flipping. And then the Prophet said Suraqa, leave us, yeah, leave us. Allah will establish this deen for us. And you, suraqa, yeah, you will wear the bangles of Kisra, the emperor of Persians. So he gave him hope.

Speaker 1: 1:39:04

In the Battle of the Trench yes, we know that they were surrounded by the Munafiqeen. The hypocrites. And the hypocrites they said look at Muhammad. Yes, he was digging and there was a spark. And the Prophet said Allahu Akbar, I see the palaces of the Romans and the Persians, or the Yemen yes, being opened by Muslims. The hypocrites. They said look at this man. I see the palaces of the Romans and the Persians or the Yemen yes, being opened by Muslims. The hypocrites. They said look at this man. He's promising that they will conquer the entire peninsula. And he could not go there. People cannot go to relieve themselves just outside the campus. Yeah, giving hope. So this is so important for us as an Ummah and as individuals, and we have a statement by the Prophet. He said days and nights will not come to an end except after Allah will let this deen to penetrate every single house of this universe, whether people like it or people don't like it.

Speaker 2: 1:40:16

Jazakallah, khair Astaghfirullah Shaykh Mullah, bless you for coming and for your insights. Obviously, we're going to have you many times to unpack many other issues for us as well. Allah Subh'anaHu Waahu wa ta'ala bless you, and hopefully this has been an insightful discussion so people who are suffering from despair or suicide ideation, or even people who know others who are suffering from this, can talk about the meaning and the purpose of the deen that give you these key principles to focus on the akhira, to establish a relation with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, to focus on the physical, the emotional and the intellectual and the communal, and hopefully, if we put some of these ideas together, we could elevate each other. Jazakallah, it was inspirational. Assalamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh Waalaikumsalam, jazakallah. Every great cause needs its defenders. On guard is our stand For truth, for the ummah, for the next generation. But don't remain on the sidelines. Become a guardian, empower the movement that refuses to stay silent. Click the link now and subscribe to On Guard wherever you get your podcasts.