Home and Marriage

When Your Family Goes Through a Storm

• Lennon and Christal Noland • Season 1 • Episode 3

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Navigating the Storms: Faith and Resilience in Marriage

In this episode of the Home and Marriage Podcast, hosts Lennon and Christal Noland discuss the challenges of enduring difficult times within the family and marriage. Reflecting on their own experiences, including a major move and financial struggles, they emphasize the importance of faith, prayer, and community support. Drawing on biblical teachings, they offer practical advice for building a strong foundation in the Lord to weather life's storms. The episode concludes with a prayer for listeners facing their own trials.

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Lennon:

This is the Home and Marriage Podcast where we help couples become better at home and stronger Together, we are Lennon and Christal Noland. We're a husband and wife, parents and ministers who want God's best for our home and yours. And today we're gonna talk about when your family is in a storm. Welcome back friends. This is Lennon, and I'm here with my friend, my lover, my baby's mother, Christal, the, uh, the Christlike Noland.

Christal:

Oh my goodness. What an introduction that is. I still need to come up with yours and I'm working on it. I'm not as great of an a rhymer like you are, you're a natural rhymer. I know. If you, you won some battle wraps back in your college days. Maybe. I I did

Lennon:

have my time. It's true.

Christal:

So, so you have, you know. A foot up on me. What do you call it?

Lennon:

A foot up. The leg up. It all works A leg up.

Christal:

Oh my gosh. I feel like Michael Scott right now,

Lennon:

the general lower part of the body, I have that advantage over. You have a leg up

Christal:

anyways. I will, I will. Maybe about the next episode, have some introduction for you.

Lennon:

Okay. We'll see. Everyone's waiting.

Christal:

Okay.

Lennon:

So today we're gonna talk about surviving whenever your marriage, your family is in a storm.

Christal:

Mm-hmm.

Lennon:

And storms are really just part of it. Like, none of us escapes a life without going through storms.

Christal:

And the word even warns us that we're gonna face trials and tribulations of many kinds. Many kinds. Yeah. You know, not just one type over and over. Like, we will face things that we didn't see coming.

Lennon:

Right. And

Christal:

You know what? We as Christians really want to, to remember is that it's gonna happen. We're not alone. We're not without hope. Mm-hmm. But how do we handle a storm, you know? Right. What do we do when it's happening? Because I know we've been through storms in our lives, throughout our marriage, whether it was marriage situations, family, just stuff from the outside happening. Mm-hmm. It's not even always send stuff, just stuff that happens. Right. And when that's happened to us, we needed encouragement in the middle of those storms. We needed to remember what do we do in this storm?

Lennon:

Right? Right. And so as we go through this show today, guys, we, we don't want, we want you to know this, uh, experiencing a storm itself does not mean that you won't come out the other side. Into something, into something better and being and being stronger. There's a reason why in the vows it says, for better or for worse, it's because the for worse part always shows up at some point. Mm-hmm. But it doesn't mean that you won't still have a until death do us part story. Right? Yeah. So what do you think, honey? I was thinking we could talk about in our marriage, you know, we've, we've now been married, we're knocking on the door 20 years here, uh, soon, but. Our first big for worse moment came around year five, year six, whenever we made a big move from Texas to North Carolina.

Christal:

Yeah, that, that was a season that really test our marriage do we really are really gonna practice the things that we've said we believe.

Lennon:

Mm-hmm.

Christal:

And we moved up to Durham, North Carolina. We were living, we're from Texas, but we were called in a big way, by the Lord to move up there, to leave everything behind, to start a college ministry on the campus of Duke University, which was not easy. Place to start ministry?

Lennon:

No.

Christal:

So we move away from all of our family, all of our friends. We didn't know anyone there, so it was a brand new place. We didn't have any money, you

Lennon:

know? No, we were so broke. We, we were entering a, um, we went there with no credit card debt and we left there with much groceries on credit cards, all sorts of intense stuff. And then our young family was growing like. Yes. Um, gosh, remember the movie Gremlins when they would throw water on a gremlin? Oh, wow. They'd start popping out everywhere.

Christal:

Is that how it was? It sort of seems like that's how

Lennon:

it was. I mean, it was only three, but it was three under three or three. Three and under.

Christal:

Well, when we arrived there, we had two. Mm-hmm. And they were, almost three and a few months old. And then we, we got just in an amazing way, got to adopt our youngest.

Lennon:

Mm-hmm.

Christal:

And, learned about her whenever we were only there for a couple months. Yeah. And we adopted her. And so we had three of three and under. And the two youngest were only seven months apart. And so we really, it was really survival mode. So we're starting this ministry in a tough place. No family. You were, you know, I was thinking earlier headed for burnout, but really you were in burnout.

Lennon:

I burned out spectacularly during that time. Mm-hmm. And, you know, part of, part of my challenge now looking back was to that point in our, in our marriage and in, in our ministry career, we had only had wonderful times. Right. To be honest. Right. I wouldn't say like no challenges, but I would just say. That generally speaking, everything we had done had gone pretty well. Yeah. Yeah. And for being young parents, um, we, our first one, we had her sleeping through the night pretty quick, a well adjusted super sweet child and all of these kinds of things. And so that first year where things were not going well. I guess broadly speaking, we could just say my career portion. I was really struggling with that. You were carrying a lot at home and because of the financial difficulties and all of these other things. Yeah. By the end of that first year I was, I was really torched emotionally. Right, right. And it all culminated. Do you remember the breaking point? Whenever I. Started breaking things.

Christal:

Well, you broke something. I don't know if you broke things. Did you break things? Multiple things? I guess not multiple things.

Lennon:

One thing, well, here's what happened. I went to the bank one day guys and um, I was in the drive through trying to do some sort of transaction that I needed my driver's license for, and it turned out I had left my driver's license at home. Mm-hmm. Uh, we live less than a mile from the bank. Not really that big of a thing. But for me, a guy who was absolutely on the edge, uh, emotionally, whenever I pulled out into traffic, it wasn't just that I needed to go get the driver's license, it is that I had forgotten it. And that was the straw that broke the camel's back.

Christal:

Mm-hmm.

Lennon:

And in the middle of traffic. So sorry to put this out there on for the world to hear.

Christal:

Well, here's what I will say about that too. Just before you say what happened. Nobody else was in the car. Nobody else was in the car. That's right. And I will say you were, I never saw you really get angry much. And you've always been very gentle, very funny, very lighthearted. So this was just out of character for you?

Lennon:

Mm-hmm. And it's because we were going in a very long, we were in a VA storm that. Was was really seeming to last. Yes. Yes. It wasn't just a tough week, multiple

Christal:

years. Yeah. It wasn't just a

Lennon:

tough month. We were going into some really tough years. Mm-hmm. And so what happened was, uh, you know, I'm talking to myself like, you're such an idiot. I can't believe you did this. You always do stupid stuff like this. I freaked out and I punched the car horn. Mm-hmm. I broke the airbag and the horn locked in the on position right in the middle of traffic. So it's just

Christal:

blaring. It's just blaring and everyone around you is like looking at you. Everyone's looking at

Lennon:

me and I'm putting my hands up, like I have no idea what's happening. This car has problems, you know? But that really was a big, a big moment for us. Whenever I went home later that day, uh, we had some friends over who. Just wonderful friends, Nathan and Aaron. Yeah. They were asking us, how are you doing? And mm-hmm. We really began to open up for them and, my friend Nathan, he, he said, my friend, you need help.

Christal:

Yeah.

Lennon:

You, you don't need to keep on going right now. Right. You actually need some help. It was a storm that we needed help coming out of. Yeah. And, um, and I did, I went to counseling. Mm-hmm. And you and I made some changes and it took a while. Mm-hmm. But things started moving in a much better direction and we learned a lot coming outta that season.

Christal:

We sure did. Our, We learned a lot and we learned how god is faithful through those storms and he, he can bring you through them.

Lennon:

Mm-hmm.

Christal:

But. What I feel like that time really taught me was that I can always trust in the Lord, even if I don't know the outcome of what's to happen. But to remember that, he's got a plan and he's not leaving us alone in these storms. God is so good to get our attention to help bring us in, to remind us of the truth.

Lennon:

Yeah. And the first big truth is remembering where to go.

Christal:

Yes. And that

Lennon:

just, we've, we've gotta go to him. So. What we want to do is we want to give you guys just a few specific points, of when, not if, but when you're going through storms. And we know that some of you listening right now are in a tough spot. We want to tell you some of the things that we've learned and some of the things that we know will help you because they, they're biblical. You're gonna face a storm, and so how do you stand strong and not get swept away? We're really told that Jesus gives us the insight for what to do going through a storm in Matthew chapter seven. And so, um, pretty familiar passage, honey.

Christal:

Yeah. So Matthew 7 24 through 27, it says, therefore, everyone who hears these words of mind acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. The rain fell, the rivers rose, and the winds blew and pounded on that house. Yet it didn't collapse because its foundation was on the rock. It's so true. What you build on is really gonna show what's gonna last. So if you do build it on the wrong things, it'll fall apart. I mean, let's say you build it on finances, on money. if your security is in your money and then you lose all that money where, what happens to you? So our foundation has to be built on the rock, which is Jesus is the Lord.

Lennon:

Yeah. And I think the interesting thing that this passage reveals to us is kind of what we've been saying, that storms are coming either way. What it reveals is what you've built on. And so if your foundation is built on the Lord, then whenever the storm is over, you still will be standing. Your, your home may have taken some hail damage. You may have to replace some windows. Who knows? But you're still going to be there. And so it's your obedience to God as a family and, and as a person that overall builds A house that can withstand a storm, right? Builds a life that can withstand a storm. Not because you're so strong, but because he is. Mm-hmm. And because he is faithful and because he won't let you down. And even whenever, whenever a storm comes because of, because you've blown it or because you've made some sort of mistake, it, maybe it wasn't sinful, but you did something that in retrospect, man, this cost you. Even just knowing who to repent to and to turn quickly back to God. Is the greatest of survival mechanisms. Right. That he's always there for us and always ready to receive us. And so that is the first thing. A solid home will be built on a solid foundation. Mm-hmm. You, you've gotta stay with the Lord.

Christal:

Um, Another thing when we are going through storms is we don't need to shut God out. Right. We gotta keep talking to him. And I think sometimes because we wanna control the situation or we think we can fix it. Especially at the beginning. I think a lot of times we go through something we think, oh, I'm just gonna fix it. But the Lord really wants us to rely on him and turn to him first. Yeah. And to talk to him because we could shut God out because maybe we're angry about what we're going through. Angry about the situation in life. We were talking about can't control the situation, so we just tend to wanna put God. I'll save you for if I really need you, but I think I can handle this. Mm-hmm. And then we get to a breaking point and realize we can't.

Lennon:

Yeah. We can try everything. But turning to God, whenever we're in a storm and feeling desperate. It's one of the things I was reading this morning in my devotional, I think it's in First Chronicles, whenever the Lord is talking about King Asa, while he was relying on God, God gave him great victories. And then at one point later in his life. He goes through a moment of fear and begins to strategize and pull other countries in, and a prophet speaks to him and reveals these words that we know. Uh, we just don't always know the context where it says the Lord's eyes roam throughout the earth, looking for someone fully devoted to him so he can be strong on their behalf, right? Like God wants to be strong on our behalf. Mm-hmm. It's not that we need to be strong enough to handle all of life. We need to be smart enough to pray to God so that he can be strong on our behalf.

Christal:

Right. I remember even during that time that we were going through this season in North Carolina, that, prayer was such a powerful thing for me because I remember when you were going through this really depressive time. You were, you were really different. You were, you were always very funny and just, you know, lighthearted never saw you. Get to this place of like sadness or depression. And so for me, I didn't know how to handle that. I didn't know what to do, but to encourage you the best I could, I would say things to you that I'm like, I know this is the answer. He just needs to listen to it. Mm-hmm. If he listens to it, everything will be okay. Yeah. Right. So for me, I'm like, I'm telling you these things and it was like my words were just falling to the ground. It didn't seem to make a difference. I remember I praying and asking the Lord to give me some insight into what is happening and what to do. And he did. He even showed me how you were even angry with the Lord. I didn't even know that you were. You were angry with God.

Lennon:

Mm-hmm. And

Christal:

so what was helpful for me as a spouse in that moment is to really cling to the Lord for the wisdom I needed, and he helped. Show me those things and then I was, it opened a door for us to get to talk about it.

Lennon:

Yeah.

Christal:

And then it was, it was healing too. Yeah. So he really does wanna talk to you and help you through your situation.

Lennon:

Yeah. That is a, that is the biggest deal. Like in a storm, we can be clueless, but God is, he's never clueless. Right. And even if it's just, I'm with you, hold on. Or it's something more insightful and specific like he shared with you. Turning to God is always the right answer. Right? And turning to his word is always the right answer. Keep reading his word and storing up good things into your heart so that mm-hmm. You know, so that you know what to clinging to, and you have wisdom, uh, that's available to you, that is just not your best friend's. Best advice, whoa. It's, it's God's advice.

Christal:

And your, your mind can go all over the place when you're in a storm. It can just head down dark roads that you did not. Need to go on, you know? Yeah. Like, you have to really renew your mind have some scriptures ready to go for when you're starting to feel the, the weight of it.

Lennon:

Mm-hmm.

Christal:

You know, for me it's really listening to worship that encourages me, that brings me closer to God. That reminds me of the truth of who God is. Mm-hmm. So for me, worship songs just help me. It, it renews my mind. Yeah. Because it gets my mind in the right place. Yeah. When, when those storms happen.

Lennon:

Yeah.

Christal:

thing too is to keep showing up to church with those who love you and love the Lord. In a hard situation, you kind of wanna disconnect sometimes. I mean, we're all different. Some of us are very introverted, some are are extroverted. Some of our natural tendencies can be to go find our friends and just, I need to tell you, I need to talk to you about this. But sometimes we can isolate ourselves and really pull back. From people that need to be in your life and need to speak into your life

Lennon:

Yeah. That's something I saw in my own introverted nature. I, I can tend to want to go dark. Mm-hmm. You know? For sure. Um, and it's definitely something we saw over and over again throughout the years as, as pastors that, you know, some couple, some family. Some person that we knew to be very involved and saw frequently would just fall off the map. Mm. And um, later on, eventually see them again or get hold of them reaching out to, to talk to them and they would reveal that something in their life had gone sideways. Right. And I, I think so often what happens is we buy into the lie that we can't be around other Christians when things are going sideways. Or that God must be mad at me if things are going sideways or angry at me because I've made things go nuts. But that is when you need to be in the presence of those who love God. Mm-hmm. Um, and who can help be a part of restoring you and encouraging you back to back to health. We need sometimes voices from the outside. Mm-hmm. Nothing that we go through. Is, um, being gone through for the first time just by us.

Christal:

Yeah.

Lennon:

Everybody's been through stuff.

Christal:

Yes. and I think we can really, put on shame in, in a way that we shouldn't. Like you said, sometimes things that happen to us, we feel shamed about even it's not our fault, but sometimes things that we've, maybe decisions we've made. It's caused a lot of repercussion.

Lennon:

Yeah.

Christal:

Sometimes it can be hard to want to go and get healing by sharing with someone, like confess your sins one to another and you'll be healed. Yeah. You know? So we need community for the things that are happening to us and not to feel shameful about those things or the things we've done. We need to have community so we can heal better. Yeah. It's hard to heal alone and isolated.

Lennon:

It is. So friends, if you're going through a storm, and if you're not, you will at some point just wanna keep reminding you, build on a solid foundation and you're building up right now to be, to be able to face a storm based on what you're doing. So stay in the word of God, uh, engage God in prayer. Stick with the people who love God and love you. Be in church. Stay in church, and I think that you'll find, you'll be able to, you'll be able to face and come out the other side of whatever storm that you're in. Would you mind praying? Yeah.

Christal:

So if you're listening, we'd love to pray for you right now. Whatever situation you're facing. We know that God, is listening and he's there, so, heavenly Father, we just pray for everyone that is listening right now. And they may be facing a storm, maybe right in the middle of it. And God, I just pray you. Continue to encourage them and reach out to them and help them know that you are not far from anyone who calls on your name. God, that you are right there. And Lord, I just thank you that you are gonna get them through this storm, not just to get them through, but to bring them closer to you, to grow in wisdom and to grow, Lord, in your strength. Lord, I thank you that when they are weak, you are strong. So, God, we thank you for your love, and we thank you that you will take care of us and that you can get us through any storm that comes our way. In Jesus name,

Lennon:

Amen. Well, friends, thank you for joining us today. We do. So hope you're encouraged for more encouragement, remember, look us up on the socials, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok with home and marriage, and we will be back with you next week. Well, Friends, thanks again for listening today. We really do believe that your home can be your favorite place and that however good things are today, you can be even better at home and stronger together. Thanks for being with us today.

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Christal Noland

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Lennon Noland

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