Tips for Marriage During Christmas and New Years: Mini Episode

Holiday Relationship Tips: Enhancing Your Marriage During Christmas and New Year

In this special holiday episode of the Home and Marriage Podcast, Lennon and Christal Noland share practical tips to help couples strengthen their marriage during the Christmas and New Year season. They discuss the importance of scheduling alone time, helping each other with holiday tasks, giving thoughtful gifts, and understanding each other's love languages. They also reflect on their own holiday traditions and experiences, and encourage listeners to appreciate their relationships as they head into the new year.

00:00 Welcome to the Home and Marriage Podcast
00:18 Christmas Preparations 
01:32 Marriage Tips for the Holiday Season
02:24 Scheduling Alone Time During the Holidays
05:30 Helping Each Other with Christmas Tasks
07:55 Thoughtful Gift Giving
10:26 Understanding and Using Love Languages
12:17 Recap and Final Thoughts
13:24 Closing Remarks and Holiday Wishes

Transcript

Lennon: 0:03

This is the Home and Marriage Podcast with Lennon and Christal Noland, where we help couples become better at home and stronger together. We're husband and wife, parents and ministers who want God's best for our home and for yours. Well, friends, Merry Christmas to you. Wherever you are and whatever you're doing, I hope that it is in the spirit of the way that things should be done. As for us, we're often running. Kids are officially out of school. This was their first full day with all of them home. But you, my lady, you, you've had a busy day.

Christal: 0:37

It's been a very busy day and I'm just glad that I'm done with this shopping. So I thought I had most of my shopping done. I had a couple more things that I realized, okay, I gotta get these things. And of course to go on a Friday in our town where we live is craziness. Yeah. And I don't know what I was thinking, but I got it done. You know, I'm in the store, you know, five below is actually a great place to get stocking stuffers. Right.

Lennon: 1:02

Five below is fantastic. And

Christal: 1:03

TJ Max. We talked about TJ Maxx. I think we should get some money from TJ Maxx for saying so much about TJ Maxx. Anyways, I'm in the store. And Addie, my oldest, came with me and she's like, mom, people annoy me at Christmas time. I go, I know. I get it. Everybody just kind of has like you could tell people are a little edgy.

Lennon: 1:24

Yeah,

Christal: 1:25

yeah.

Lennon: 1:25

People need Jesus move at Christmas time.

Christal: 1:28

I need Jesus at Christmas time. Yeah. I need Jesus. Yeah. Yeah.

Lennon: 1:31

We do need Jesus at Christmas time. And speaking of needing Jesus, uh, there are some things that really make Christmas just more enjoyable, and so our contribution to you friends listening this week that, that we wanted to give you just a short podcast. We wanna give you some marriage tips for this Christmas and New Year's. Week. These are things that we actively do to make the Christmas week, uh, just more enjoyable, not just for us and family, but for for us,

Christal: 2:05

right? For

Lennon: 2:05

you and for me.

Christal: 2:07

Because marriage is still going on while there's Christmas time.

Lennon: 2:10

It's true. Our

Christal: 2:10

love should still be present and evident during the, during Christmas and New Year's,

Lennon: 2:16

because when it's over, we're gonna be stuck with each other.

Christal: 2:18

That's right.

Lennon: 2:20

So let's go through this. What are the, what's our little list that we've put together for'em?

Christal: 2:24

So first of all, parents of littles. Know that this may be hard for you in this season, but find some way to still schedule some time alone during the rush of the holiday season. And what we mean is if you're in that phase where, Hey, we're putting the kids to bed and we're gonna hang out, just me and my spouse gonna watch a movie, gonna do whatever you do to just spend intentional time alone. Don't forget about date night. Date night can still happen during Christmas time.

Lennon: 2:57

Mm-hmm.

Christal: 2:58

So Lenon, what do you think about that? Like how important is it for us to spend some time alone during Christmas? As hard as that could be.

Lennon: 3:06

Yeah. I think it's, I think it's just a joyful. Reprieve from the preparation, from doing things for the kids, if you have kids from going to office parties or whatever, if that is, if that is your deal and your schedule. One of the ways we've fit this in over the years is we have a, a Christmas night tradition. Sometimes it's moved a little bit, but. All the time during the Christmas season. I don't know that we've missed in a really good while. Uh, we watch it's a wonderful life together. Mm-hmm. Kids go to bed. It's you and me. It's a wonderful life. The finest meats and cheeses that Aldi has. Oh my gosh. You say this all the time. I know, I do. And, and it's real. And we, we settle in and we watch the show.

Christal: 3:46

Yeah. Or a good Coke Zero. I love Coke Zero.

Lennon: 3:50

Coke Zero and Fresca really capture the spirit of the season for a couple of boring middle-aged parents.

Christal: 3:56

Here's what I'm gonna say, Some of us have, like you said, you mentioned office Christmas parties or maybe church Christmas events. There's so many events and things scheduled and we put aside everything to go to those events, you know, get dressed up and do the thing. So why not? Schedule some alone time with your loved one.

Lennon: 4:21

Yeah, so we did something new this year that whenever we were done, we're like, we're gonna make this a tradition just in this deal of scheduling some alone time. We leveraged our relationship with the grandparents. Wouldn't y'all love to see your grandchildren for a night? Because it just so happens we bought concert tickets up in North Dallas, so we bought concert tickets to Andrew Peterson. Fantastic Christmas concert. We stayed at a hotel the next morning before we came home. We walked around. We had some very mid Thai food for lunch, and there was a hair in my egg roll. Ooh, gross.

Christal: 4:59

And we

Lennon: 4:59

sent it back.

Christal: 5:00

Yeah, gross.

Lennon: 5:00

Probably don't need to share that with our friends.

Christal: 5:02

T-M-I-T-M-I Lennon.

Lennon: 5:04

But the point is, after all of that. We were like, this was really great.

Christal: 5:07

Yeah,

Lennon: 5:07

this was really worth it.

Christal: 5:08

We were so glad we did it and we, we made sacrifices where we needed to so we could,

Lennon: 5:14

Yes, we did, because the Christmas budget is not infinite.

Christal: 5:17

It's not, especially when you're buying gifts for everybody and you're having to spend money on. Stuff you don't normally spend it on.

Lennon: 5:25

Right. So that's the first thing. Schedule some alone time together. What's number two? Christal, take us away.

Christal: 5:30

So number two is help each other out. And what we mean by that is don't put all the Christmas to-dos on just one person, even though there usually is one person. Sometimes the mom that does a lot of the Christmas stuff, because I know that you can't wrap a Christmas gift to save your life.

Lennon: 5:49

I can't wrap a Christmas gift to save my life. And let's be honest, a lot of the times I found out what the kids got for Christmas on Christmas morning. The truth is, in our family, you do way more than I do for Christmas. I do the literal heavy lifting. It's a, it's a big sweaty day. Getting stuff down from the attic, dragging stuff inside. That's right. Taking stuff back out. But you do the budgeting, the planning you do most I shop for you. Yeah, you do. And that's the only person I shop for at Christmas. And so gentlemen, arise with me if this is your arrangement also. Make sure that your wife has as much help as she wants. Yeah. The truth is you do all this stuff better than me and you don't want me getting in the way of most of it. Mm-hmm. But if I don't offer to help you at all, you can really feel like the Wizard of Oz behind the curtain trying to make this whole Christmas thing happened by yourself in. We shouldn't do that. Yes. So in what ways, when I've helped you appropriately, how have I helped you? How can men help out?

Christal: 6:54

Well, first of all, I think as wives, we need to be willing to ask our husbands for help because here's what we tend to do, and how do I know this? Maybe speaking for from experience, I don't know,

Lennon: 7:04

masterclass,

Christal: 7:04

but we tend to get a little, um, we tend to get a little resentful because we're doing so much, and so I, I really think for us as wives, sometimes we need to stop thinking that we are supposed to do. Everything, and it's all on us. Nobody can help us. We have to carry the whole burden. Sometimes we need to say, Hey honey, can you do this for me? Could you pick up the groceries since I'll be going and getting some presents? I just think we need to also ask for help, but it's so good. I think just as husband and wife that we recognize that we need to help each other. I know when you see me working a lot, you do offer too, so that's really helpful. That's really helpful.

Lennon: 7:48

Yes, so don't let all the Christmas festivities be, be ran by just one person. Help'em out. The third thing I'll deliver this one is get them something thoughtful for Christmas day. Don't use if you, if you have kids, don't use all of your thoughtfulness. On the kids. Mm-hmm. Save a little bit for the person you love. Pay attention. So what they've said, men write it down in your phone super quickly or save the text something, but be thoughtful about Christmas Day. You don't want it to be like the SNL episode. I got a robe.

Christal: 8:26

Yeah, the skit where the mom just gets a robe and everybody gets like everything on their list that they wanted. Yes. And she keeps saying, and I got a robe.

Lennon: 8:33

Yeah.

Christal: 8:34

And I got a robe.

Lennon: 8:36

You don't want that. Yeah. And you don't wanna leave the TJ Maxx tag on there with the price on it. You want to be thoughtful, listen intently, surprise them. Effort is more important than price tag, but pay attention and do something thoughtful.

Christal: 8:51

Yeah. I saw a really funny reel the other day. I actually showed it to you. But the husband is teaching other husbands. What a stocking is, what a wife's stocking is, and what to do with it. And he talks about filling it up. He's like, go, you know, look on her counter, get some of the products that she loves to use. Go get more of those. Go to the, the lady at Ulta say, Hey, I want more of this stuff. Like, go fill that thing up with goodies for Christmas, because it is true. A lot of times the mom gets forgotten in the stocking, so. So, yeah. Do something thoughtful for each other on Christmas Day. if your wife says, I don't want anything, I'm fine. I don't really need anything. That is your cue to go find her Something that is not, that is not what that means.

Lennon: 9:37

This is a, a very important moment in the history of men understanding women. Yes. I feel, yes. So why do women say I don't want anything?

Christal: 9:44

Well, I don't know.

Lennon: 9:46

Are you saying that as a woman you don't always understand women

Christal: 9:49

as a woman? I don't even always understand myself. I would just say, but I think we do that because we're trying to be self-sacrificing and we're trying to be like, I don't wanna be a needy person. Now I have friends who will be clear like, honey, I'm gonna give you all the links to the things I want for Christmas. So this is not all women, but if a woman says, I don't need anything, don't get me anything, do not listen to that. Does that make sense?

Lennon: 10:14

It does. So don't listen to your woman and listen to my woman right now who's saying, get her something. Get

Christal: 10:20

her something, and something thoughtful

Lennon: 10:22

and something thoughtful.

Christal: 10:23

Okay, let's, let's move on to the next one. Uh, the next one is, don't forget their love language.

Lennon: 10:30

This could be a cheat code in terms of get them something thoughtful actually, because what we tend to do, and the whole love language thing was come up with by an author. It's not written down in the Bible. This isn't a commandment of scripture. And yet it is a fantastic grid to understand basically this concept that we tend to love someone in the way that we like to be loved. Mm-hmm. And so that if I am an acts of service person and I am, I might try to love you by doing the laundry for you, washing the dishes for you, all of which you appreciate. But you don't appreciate it as much as me encouraging you with words of affirmation. Mm-hmm. Or sitting aside quality time.

Christal: 11:15

I know it's really important to me, and I know when you speak that language, I, I feel loved and I know for you, yours is acts of service. So here's an example on Christmas morning, I know I'll be bringing you some coffee, probably your third cup in the morning. Mm-hmm. Because we're tired. I'll be baking the,

Lennon: 11:35

sticky buns. Sticky

Christal: 11:36

buns. I'll be bringing you the sticky buns and the bacon, so I know that's something you feel very loves and you're gonna, you're just gonna be glowing on Christmas day.

Lennon: 11:46

I will be, and it doesn't matter what's what the gifts are, because I will be glowing because of that. But the real simple thing is these five love languages, it's quality time, acts of service, physical touch, words of affirmation. And giving of gifts. Mm-hmm. Basically, one of those is probably the way your spouse likes to be loved. Ask them about it, and if they say, Hey, it's none of those, why would you put me in a box? Here is my sixth and seventh favorite Love language. Love them. How they enjoy being loved.

Christal: 12:16

Yes. Amen. Okay, so let's recap. What are the things?

Lennon: 12:20

The things were schedule some time alone together.

Christal: 12:24

It's not too late. I know this comes out two days before Christmas. Yeah. But it's not too late to schedule a little time in the holidays alone.

Lennon: 12:30

Doesn't mean you even have to leave the house.

Christal: 12:32

True.

Lennon: 12:33

Send the kids to bed. Stay up a little late. Enjoy each other.

Christal: 12:36

Right. And then.

Lennon: 12:38

We're gonna help each other out. Mm-hmm. I'm not gonna let you run the whole show by yourself. You are gonna get as much help as you are willing to let me help, because I'm gonna ask you, honey, is there anything I can do?

Christal: 12:48

Yeah. I love how you hold the trash bag on Christmas morning.'cause I would hate doing that.

Lennon: 12:53

I'm so good at that.

Christal: 12:54

So there you go. And then the third thing is get them something thoughtful for Christmas Day. It's two days before, guys. You still have time.

Lennon: 13:02

You have time to think about it and to go out in town, wait into the madness and find something that'll make them smile.

Christal: 13:09

And then last, don't forget their love language.

Lennon: 13:11

Yeah, just pay attention to how each other is wired. You are the only one who can love them the way you can love them. Wow, that sounds simple, but it's also true. You know them better than anyone else. Devote yourself to the craft.

Christal: 13:23

That's right. Well, that's it. Lennon. That's our mini episode for Christmas, tips for Marriage.

Lennon: 13:28

And hey friends, as you're going into the new year, one more thing, celebrate, you're still together. You've made it through, and 2026 is looking bright, so. Don't forget to follow or subscribe so you never miss an episode of Today's conversation, encouraged you and you think it would encourage a friend. Would you send this over to them, help them find the show, expand the community. You can always visit home and marriage.com for more resources, like our Six Habits of Happy Couples Course. And if you'd like us to come speak at your church, you can schedule us through that website. Follow us along over the holidays on all the socials, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok.

Christal: 14:05

Thank you for joining us on the Home and Marriage Podcast. We really do believe that home can be your favorite place. We'll be back again next week with more encouragement and wisdom to help you become better at home and stronger together. Merry Christmas and a happy New Year.