Redefining Legacy: Who You Are Is What You Leave Behind

When you hear the word legacy, what comes to mind?

For most people, it’s money. Inheritance. Something material left behind.

But legacy is so much deeper than that.

In this episode, we’re redefining what legacy really means—and shifting the focus from what you leave to people, to what you leave in people.

Because legacy isn’t just about wealth.
It’s about your name.
Your presence.
The way people feel when they encounter you.

It’s who you are when no one is watching.

As a wife, mother, and entrepreneur, I’m realizing that legacy is being built in real time—through daily choices, quiet obedience, and the way I show up even when it’s hard.

In this conversation, we talk about:

• Why obedience matters more than perfection
• How your everyday life is teaching legacy—whether you realize it or not
• The difference between building a brand and becoming a person of impact
• Why who you’re being matters more than what you’re building
• The seeds you’ve already planted—and how to start watering them

This episode is a reminder that legacy isn’t something you wait to create “one day.”

It’s being built right now:

• In your choices
• In your alignment
• In your presence
• In the unseen moments

We also dive into what it looks like to build with longevity—not chasing trends, but walking in truth, purpose, and identity.

And if you’ve been craving deeper alignment, real community, and a space to grow into the woman you’re becoming, this episode is an invitation.

Reflection Question:
What are you planting today that will still speak for you tomorrow?

Join the Community:
If this message speaks to you—if you’re navigating motherhood, marriage, leadership, and rediscovering yourself—you’re not alone.

Inside the Kissed by BO's Style Lounge, we focus on fashion, wellness, faith, and becoming. It’s a space for women who are ready to show up with intention, confidence, and purpose.  join he

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

I want to start with something tangible. Think about a piece in your closet that feels timeless, not trendy, not too loud, but meaningful. Something that you pass down, right? Something that you've always come back to. That's what legacy feels like. You feel me? It's not about how much it costs, it's about what it carries. You feel me? Memories, confidence, all that intention. Listen, let me tell you. The same way a timeless outfit never goes out of style, the same way meaningful legacy never fails. So before we talk about clothes, confidence, or calling, let's pause. Let's take a breath. How are you feeling today? Listen, welcome to Ask Me Wife, Mom Designer Equals God. I am your host. Embrace your own smile, luxury denim designer, and a wearable art stylist. Listen, fashion executive, mother to a tiny CEO, a wife to a king, and most importantly, I am a walking prayer. This space is for grace, grit garments, and what God, because couture, chaos, and calling can really coexist. You feel me? The title of today's episode is Redefining Legacy. Let's redefine what does it mean to you, okay? Listen, jump on into it. Reading Legacy. When we hear the word legacy, most of us think about money, right? The dictionary actually defines it in a few different ways, right? The amount of money property left to a person in the will, long, the long-lasting impact of a person's life, actions or choices, sometimes transmitted or received from an ancestor, predecessor, or the past, right? So when I read that and something clicked. Yes, money can be a part of legacy, but that's not the whole story because everyone leaves a legacy, even if there's no money attached to it. Legacy is your name. It's how people feel when they hear it, right? It's what people remember when you leave the room. You feel me? That's why I believe your personal brand is your legacy. It's not a logo, it's not an Instagram grid, but who you are when no one is watching. Who are you? Do you know, right? But then we're talking about legacy through daily life. For me, as a wife, a mom, an entrepreneur, I realized something. I'm teaching legacy every single day, whether I mean to or not. My son is learning values by watching how I live, how I respond, how I handle pressure, how I walk through with obedience. As well as my husband. You feel me? He's watching us. And I'll be honest, obedience isn't always fun. As I've said this when throughout this podcast, this season, it's not always fun. It's not always cute, it's not always comfortable, but it's fruitful. If I shall say that again, obedience is fruitful. When you choose alignment with God's will, even when it's hard, we're teaching something deeper than words ever could. We're teaching faith over fear, integrity over convenience, purpose over popularity. That's real. That's legacy, not perfection. It's obedience. And for an example, even what I have on right now, this is, I would say this is legacy. But if y'all probably like, Ray Shir, you have on a tutu and then a she shirt in sequence. So you would think I'm not into trendy stuff, right? But I'm gonna tell you right now what the reason why I have this outfit is a story. So this this top I have on it says she. I'm literally doing a podcast. My mom's, I'm at my parents' home. My mom was like, Is that my shirt? I said, No, this is mine. She's like, Oh, okay, you got yours on. This is her tutu. This is her shirt. That's legacy to me. You feel me? Me being able to wear the pieces that she has because she has so much strength in it. You know what I'm saying? She has so much tenacity and so much zeal in this. When she wears it, she rocks it. So when I put it on, I feel just like her. That's legacy. That's the story behind this. And I just added my little denim, you know, little rap joints, you feel me? My little, because I'm cold in here, you know? That's legacy. But let's talk about brand building with legacy and the longevity and the longevity of it all, right? Lately, I've been asking myself a different kind of brand question. It's not what am I building, but who am I being while I am built, right? Because brand building with longevity isn't about trends, it's about truth. It'sn't about trends, it's about truth. It's about who are you when you leave the room. Whether you bring light, whether you bring joy, whether you, whether people feel seen, encouraged, or inspired after encountering you. That's the goal. That's my personal brand. That's personal branding. That is legacy. Because the seeds that we are planting today will become fruitful. Legacy doesn't happen overnight, y'all, because the seeds is built seed by seed. Some seeds you planted years ago, you know, and now it's time to water them. You feel me? For me, it looks like community. And I love, love, love. When I tell y'all I love building community, just to be totally transparent with you all, it's like I keep more and more and more and more. I just want to get girls together, get girls together and uplift, uplift, uplift. So I have a uh um Bible study group that I um I lead Bible study every Tuesday. And a group chat is about the max, maybe 22 to 32 people in the group chat. They don't all respond, they don't all communicate, but they're on there. If we need a prayer, we can go in there and pray with each other. If we have something that we want to share, scripture, sermon, whatever, we can all go, we all go on this chat and we share with each other. You feel me? And then, as well as that, I got six brand ambassadors, six young girls ranging from post grad as well as still in school, helping me build this brand. That's a community. Then on top of that, I have brand ambassadors that are just hired in. I had about 11 of them, you feel me, just just onboarded them on the other day, and it's just that's that again is community building. So it was a Facebook group, you know what I'm saying? In school, stay tuned. I'm gonna tell you about the school platform. We'd love to have you on there, you know. But for me, legacy looks like community. Years ago, years ago, years ago, I wrote down a vision fashion, wellness, community, masterclasses, a space where women feel a space where women could gather together, talk, heal, and grow together. You feel me? That seed was planted a long time ago, y'all. Like long time ago. And now it's time to water it. That's what legacy looks like in real life, in real time. All of these communities that I've built, we're watering it. We're watering it. Although they're helping me, it's still a community. You feel me? That's what legacy, that's what legacy building looks like in real life to me. The brand ambassadors that I that I have with my brand that are not just getting, you know, selling and posting for me, but we are really building a community together of kiss by bow. You feel me? Like, I want them to feel good before they put their clothes and all that good stuff. You know, that's the vibe. Fashion woman's at its core. With my interns, literally, the other day, I just had a round table discussion. It was called Fashion Women's Conversations. And basically, the ladies got on there, had about three ladies in a studio, and I myself, and I was the one like hosting like a little talk show, you know, amen how they speak that into existence, right? And so we were in there talking, and I had like, if I got six interns, I had maybe five there just assisting and helping in a photographer, right? Can I tell you those were two different generations? The ladies who are interviewing, we are all in our 30s moms, some are wives, some are uh divorced, but we have a different perspective of life. And the interns are all literally in college post-grad, like recently post-grad, and they're just sitting there listening, like this, listening. Like you listening to me. You feel me? Like literally. And at the end, I asked him, I said, Did y'all learn something from this? And they said, definitely I did. Definitely. Y'all gotta go take a look at that too. My fashion won't be conversations. The one girl, the one ladies were talking about um color wisdom, and how they back in the day they were saying how you're cute for a dark-skinned girl. And one of my interns said, I still struggle with that. My guest, one of the women, I'm sorry, Candy told me. She didn't tell me, she told my interit gets greater later. That right there, that's community. That's what lazy button looks like for me in real time. And I'm just so grateful that I'm able to pour into these people, or maybe not even me pouring into always. Sometimes I'm just facilitating the room, facilitating the environment. And I'm so grateful that the Lord allowed me to do that. That He's He keeps putting in measure, Ratia, community, community, community. I think that's the reason why we're back home. Because it's community. You feel me? And listen, if you're craving community, because sometimes people are, I do know a lot of my mom friends are. This is imitation for community growth to you. If you're craving alignment to community, if you're craving growth, style that reflects your inner becoming, come and join us with the Kiss by Both style lounge. It's a space for women who are planting seeds with intention. You feel me? Women who want to build something that lasts, not just for today, but for generations to come. That's what we're doing. And listen, leading by example, because I'm doing it, so come on and come on in the room. But in closing, legacy isn't about waiting until you've made it. Listen, it's not that. Legacy is built. It's in your choices, it's in your obedience, it's in your presence, it's in the seeds you plant, but no one is applauding. How are you maneuvering that? So ask yourself today, what am I planting right now, right now, on this day, that will still be speaking when I'm gone, long gone. You are becoming. You are becoming, and that's what matters. If this conversation resonated with you, and advocating motherhood, marriage leadership is still trying to remember who you are. Share it with a mom who needs this reminder, a woman who needs this reminder. In the comment section, please tell me what luxe it means to you. And if you're gonna go deeper into finding your style and your confidence at that next level, you know where to find me. Hey, over there on the school platform. Keep my both style loud, you feel me? Until next time, you dress with intention, move with confidence, do not forget who you are becoming. Don't ask me how I'm doing it.

unknown 9:46

Ask God.

SPEAKER_00 9:47

Alright, y'all.