Why You Don’t Think Like Me: The Truth About Generational Friendships

Why You Don’t Think Like Me: The Truth About Generational Friendships 

Friendship hasn’t gotten worse… it’s just gotten different. 

In this episode of Slightly Unsupervised, Jennifer and Jackie break down how friendships have evolved from Baby Boomers to Gen Z—and why every generation connects, communicates, and shows up in completely different ways. 

From the loyalty and “don’t talk about it” mindset of Baby Boomers, to the independent, low-maintenance friendships of Gen X… to the emotionally expressive Millennials and the boundary-driven Gen Z—each generation has its own friendship language. 

And sometimes… those languages don’t translate. 

Jennifer and Jackie get real about: 

•  Why different generations expect completely different things from friendship 
•  The biggest clashes between loyalty, communication, and boundaries 
•  How the way you were raised shapes how you show up as a friend 
•  Why some people want to talk everything out… and others just want you to get over it 
•  How to stop taking generational differences personally—and start understanding them 

They also share real-life stories, generational frustrations, and a few laugh-out-loud moments (including the reality of growing up with wall phones and zero privacy).
 
Because the truth is—
 we’re all using the word “friendship”…
 
👉 but we don’t all mean the same thing.
 

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This episode of Slightly Unsupervised was brought to you by the creators of Bestiemony®—the original friendship ceremony that proves soulmates don’t always come with a marriage license. Hosted by Jennifer and Jackie: best friends, business partners, and co-founders of the movement celebrating real, ride-or-die love.

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Transcript

Jennifer 0:00

Hey there, I'm Jennifer. And I'm Jackie. And welcome to Slightly Unsupervised. We're best friends, business partners, and the chaos behind bestimony, a ceremony we created to celebrate the kind of soulmates who don't come with a marriage license.

Jackie 0:12

This podcast is all about that friendship energy, the deep stuff, the messy stuff, and the laugh till you snort stuff.

Jennifer 0:17

So whether you're driving, folding laundry, hiding in your car for some peace and quiet, you're in good company.

Jackie 0:22

Let's get slightly unsupervised. In this episode, me and Jennifer break down how friendships have evolved from baby boomers to Gen Z and why each generation connects, communicates, and shows up so differently. From loyalty and proximity-based friendships to constant communication and emotional transparency, every generation has its own friendship language. Jennifer and I will unpack why baby boomers prioritize loyalty and stability, how Gen X built deep but low maintenance friendships, why millennials normalize emotional openness and constant connection, how Gen Z redefined friendship with boundaries, identity, and digital life, and why gener where generational misunderstandings come from, and how to bridge the gap. Because friendship hasn't gotten worse, it's just changed.

Jennifer 1:08

Absolutely. We have, have you ever noticed how every gen every generation expect completely different things from friendships? For example, one friend might be, why didn't you call me? And another group is like, Well, why are you calling me? So we're using the same word friendship, but we don't mean the same thing. And these are generational friendships. This is why we love the way we do. I think it's important that we try to unpack this a little bit. I know that there's definitely a difference in the generations and how it was. There's, we're gonna go, Jackie and I, full transparency, are Gen X, and pretty solidly we we identify very deeply with the Gen X group because we were kind of raised on our own. But there's different generations, and I just kind of want to go through them real fast. Um, the baby boomers, they're from 1946 to 1964. This is more my mom. I think she's a little bit younger than this, or a little bit older than this, but I think she grew up mostly during this time. And their friendship style is loyal, long-term, proximity-based, because they never had any access to anybody other than their person in their community. And then they're just less emotionally expressive. And I know, Jenky, for me and you, probably from our mother's perspectives, that um I always think that that generation, or at least I felt as a child, that generation was very don't tell any secrets, don't it's all great. Does that you know does that resonate with you a little bit? Like, we don't we don't talk about stuff like that. Like, that's not what we talk about.

Jackie 2:42

And you know what I think, and I think they got it from the generation before, because I think my the my grandparents were the same way.

Jennifer 2:47

Right. Like, don't air the dirty laundry of the household, so stay quiet about it. That they're very kept. You know, like I if I look at my mom, which I'm gonna put my mom in this generation, even though I think she's not quite in this generation, but you know, they she had a lot of and and they their entire generation was kind of raised around more structural households, more so than we did. Obviously, the parents were still married in that generation more so than on our generation. I think that's when we're like the generation of all the divorces. They have, you know, my mom spent a lot of time at church with her friends um in her neighborhood, and obviously she's there was more secrets, yeah. But she got her friends from a different place, like just in the neighborhood. Like you only had to deal with the neighborhood people. So, and their emotionally expression wasn't emotional expression wasn't emphasized for them. They were not, they were raised by a generation even more quiet than them, and they were not expected to say much about it. So, and uh they really end up with like the same friends for their entire lives because they really don't have, you know, have you noticed the baby boomers on the internet? I mean, we are, I don't know really what to do. My mom constantly, and this is funny, but my mother constantly texts me in the morning and says, Why did you unfriend me? I'm like, What? She's like, Why did you unfriend me, Jennifer? I cannot see your stuff. And I'm like, first of all, I haven't posted anything, and I did not unfriend you, mom. And then I have to go into my friend log on my compute, on my Facebook, and I have to screenshot it. And there's a couple of Sandys I'm friends with, so she's one of them. I'm like, here you are, Mom. You're in my friend group. Like, I don't know how many times I have to go over this with her, but I have been accused many times of unfriending my mother. Um, it's because she doesn't understand, you know, how to really get in. Not that we are very we're any better, Jack. I mean, I think we probably have our own issues, but we're a little bit better than that. But it's just the way it is with, you know, these generations, they're different than us. So they don't have, they're not digitalized at all. They're not internet based very well. And they don't, they try, but they don't do very well. So they don't talk about everything, but they stay. So then there's the generation X, Jackie. That's us.

Jackie 4:55

That's us. Independent.

Jennifer 4:57

65 to 1980. So we are both born in 1970. We're about a month apart. So we're almost, you know, we're probably less than a month apart, actually. So we are right smack dab in the middle of the Gen Xs. And you can talk about this and I can talk about this. The different friendship styles in that group is that we are independent. We were raised latchkey generation. We just said it. Well, a lot of our parents got divorced. If they didn't get divorced, there certainly was the call to two parents working, right? My mom's generation, maybe it wasn't as prevalent, but in our generation, everybody went to work.

Jackie 5:34

Yeah, my parents both worked.

Jennifer 5:36

They were together, but they both worked. They both worked. So they were gone most of the day. So we were by ourselves. Um, but we kind of have more deep, low maintenance friendships, meaning we don't need to have so much maintenance on them. We're not, I think we're pretty cemented in the fact that we're friends and we're not going anywhere. And it doesn't require an everyday conversation with each other. Um, and we're loyalty driven. And we learned self-reliance really early. And we built bonds based on without parental involvement. So a lot of our friendships were nothing to do with our parents. They were like our own selection of family. I think that's the if I was gonna say that for the Gen X's, is like we went around and picked out sisters and people that we created our own little family of friendships because that was how we lived, right? I think at nighttime, my mom always said that you know, you guys would be on the phone for hours just discussing the next day. What are you gonna wear? What are you wearing? And like, what are you gonna do? Like, everything was about the next day, like our entire lives. So, are you picking me up? I mean, Jackie and I wrote to school together when she got a car uh before that. We had to ride the bus, but you know, it was a lot of like, okay, people.

Jackie 6:51

Oh, we found rides. Yeah, we found rides. No problem.

Jennifer 6:56

We get people to take us to school. We that was the other thing. We were resourceful, right? I mean, that was part of our generation was how to get somewhere without any real way of you know having any access to any cars or anything, but we saw how many money either. Yeah, no money and no money either. So we all took jobs really early. I just saw, I was just telling my son this. This is an interesting thing. I just want to bring that real fast. 20 years ago, everybody had a the first time you had a job was age 16, right? I heard this on the radio the other day. Today, the first gener the first job for most of the kids is 22 years old.

Jackie 7:34

Twenty-two sorry, I was working at 12.

Jennifer 7:37

Yeah. I was working now at Boy or Associates, remember? I was like 13, 14 years old probably, but 22? What in the world? 22? I have two kids at 22. Oh, career, and you guys are just starting, so I just think that's so strange. Anyway, so we can have long gaps without loss of connection. Uh we have deep support and crisis, and we have less day-to-day commission. We don't check in, but we show up, and I think that's probably true. So then we go on to the millennials, the 1981 to 1996ers. Uh and this generation is completely different. Now they they have some of their some of their sons in this generation. I think your sons are in this generation, but both my kids are. Their generation was more, some of it was not digitalized, and then some of it was digitized. So my son is 1988. He's kind of a little more less in the digital era, although he's very computer, he's a tech nerd. Um, but they had some of it with without tech and some of it with, but they started it. So they're emotionally expressive, they communicate, the communication is heavy, experience driven, and validation awareness. And they they were raised in the culture of therapy, where we were not raised in the culture of therapy. So they're always looking for uh I guess if there's an issue, there's a there's a new word for it. It wasn't words that we had when we were kids. Um and some social media, I don't think they were full, it was a full social media beginning, but they have the social media era, which is a rough era to be in. If you have to look for your validation on social media, I can see how that could be very tough because it's very harsh. And you're not just appealing to one person, you're trying to appeal to a group and trying to be validated by people you don't even know. I I mean that's that's gotta be somewhat of a real heart to be on.

Jackie 9:36

And I have I have we have three millennials and one Gen Z. I have my kids, and I have one one of my kids that I definitely that has that. Does that definitely yeah?

Jennifer 9:47

Uh to be to be to be brought up in that is tough. And I I feel sorry for you because your childhood should have been just rocks and get up in the morning and get bored. But the generation of millennials probably more so, or they don't know how to be bored. We did a lot of creative things when we got bored, or we made up things to do when we got bored, or we talked on the phone, and I mean who knows what we talked about either. We got bored on the phone, we caught up with everything. Like, we must have like talked about some weird stuff because we were bored.

Jackie 10:21

We did.

Jennifer 10:22

Yeah, that's probably why we talked on the phone every night about what outfits we were gonna wear. I'm sure that girls do that, but maybe not to the length we did it because we're just trying to keep ourselves from being bored. But they regularly text in, they regularly are texting and checking in with each other. They talk their through their feelings. We definitely probably don't do that. And they do a lot of shared experiences. They're not talking about it in their generation, if they're not talking about it, are they is everything okay? Like they're worried about it. Where our generation's like, if I don't talk to you, you're fine. What do you need? If you need something, call me, you know, kind of thing. So then there's the Gen Z. This is the new generation, and actually, the new generation has just started, but this is the generation of Gen Z, 1997 to 2012. They're boundary focused, identity aware, digitally connected, and selective but expressive. They grew up fully online. That's a generation, the first generation that was fully online the entire time they were in their childhood. So their mental health awareness was pretty aware. They were normalized by that because they'd already heard it. The millennials kind of brought that into the generations, and so they were more, it was pretty normal. Their conversations probably are pretty normal about mental health, and they have a high exposure to diverse perspectives, and that's true because they're on the internet all the time, right? You get a lot of different perspectives where we didn't have that, we had the perspectives of Lake Arrowhead and whoever we hung out with. Whoever we hung out with, even the perspectives. Remember this check when we were kids was that Lake Arrowhead, I grew up in Orange County too, or my one of my friends was from Orange County. So she would come up. Her perspective was different than ours, right? Because she grew up in a little bit of a different. We were, it was a little different than our perspective because we had we had just around us and she had just around her. So even the distance was a little different. So they are constantly digitally connected, they're strong with their boundaries, and they're quick to cut off misaligned relationships. So they will dump you quickly. If they don't like what you if you don't agree with them, supposedly, then they're pretty quick to cut you off. So they'll tell you exactly how they feel, and then they'll block you if you need to be. Like they don't care. So there doesn't appear to be a very strong loyalty bound in the gen Gen Z.

Jackie 12:36

Um, but they're a little more And that's scary because I know some parents that have been where the kids now will just cut off their parents.

Jennifer 12:44

Yeah. Like it happens all the time.

Jackie 12:46

Literally cut off. Like I understand, like maybe you just don't talk to them as often. Your parents to literally like cut off and not have anything to do with them at all. I mean, you gotta at least say hello. You gotta at least, you know, I mean have some kind of connection, you know, not connection, but at least, you know, you still want them to be alive. You still want them to be there, you know what I mean? But like not to ever, ever talk to them again.

Jennifer 13:08

I know.

Jackie 13:08

Or be like, I want you dead, you know?

Jennifer 13:11

I know.

Jackie 13:11

I just I think I mean that's a little little harsh. It's a little harsh, but it it's And it's like to where the parents don't even know what they did, you know?

Jennifer 13:21

Right.

Jackie 13:21

And it really and when you hear the story and and when there's other people uh who were kind of there too, and like they really didn't do anything, it's it that's sad to me. And it's just it's sad. It's sad.

Jennifer 13:33

It's very sad. Yeah. I think there's a lot more conflict, at least maybe because I'm a girl, maybe the perspective's different, but there's a lot more conflict between girls and mothers and girls. The girl generation is really having a lot of conflict.

Jackie 13:47

I don't see a lot of conflict with the boys. Um it actually happened with the son's family first, and then and then it ended up happening with the female's family, but then now they're friends with the female's family, but not back with the son's family.

Jennifer 14:00

Yeah, that's not good.

Jackie 14:01

Mm-mm.

Jennifer 14:02

I know a lot, I noticed there's a lot of people that have, you know, the mothers and the girlfriends or the daughters or whatever clash, and there's always these kind of problems because we're raised differently. So it's this is a good in this is a good one for you and I to do because we have kids that are in a different generation with different perspectives, but also for the other generations that are listening to this to understand that every perspective is different because we're raised differently. And it's not our fault that we were raised in those generations, we just were, and it's not your fault you were raised in those generations, you just were, and somehow to bridge the gap between them because every family brings some dynamic to relationships that are needed, and we all try.

Jackie 14:46

Yeah, everybody remember why you love why you love that person that you're with because we raise them. Whether it's the fee the boy or the girl, we raise them. Right. We love them for a reason, right? We raised them to be the person that you love, right?

Jennifer 14:59

And we're there's something we did right. Yes, there's something we did right. If you I think there's a lot of like checklists, I'm sure my daughter-in-law has a checklist. She's like, Wow, number one, your son doesn't pick up his clothes when he's done. Well, that's not my fault. That's you know, that's his fault.

Jackie 15:15

Taught him to do that doesn't mean he does it.

Jennifer 15:19

Number two, he's not very responsive when I want him to go get me my tombs. Tell you, man.

Jackie 15:26

Put them in your pocket when you get up in the morning.

Jennifer 15:28

So I'm sure there are very, you know, there's generational misalignments, and we're pretty tough. Like, Jack, we're like, well, get over it, move on. Like, and they're like, What? First of all, you can't say things like that to us. We're like, well, that's the generation we were raised in. Like, don't whine about it. I mean, something pretty traumatic just happened in my life not too long ago. And I, you know, I reached out to Michelle, who's a very chill woman and raised in the generation X, and she's like, you're fine, you'll get over it. It's very normal, right? I'm like, let me get a hold of a millennial baby. I couldn't need more comfort than this, and just get over it. But, you know, that's just our generations, and um we have to accept that. And if you are having issues in the generations, you've got to understand, go study that generation a little bit, go see what they are. I will say this, and I think it's true, is that I went to a Tony Robbins, you know, I paid the 17,000. I don't remember how much money it was, but I went to his business class. He does like a seminar thing. But they were bringing this up because there's a lot of businesses that um are raised were probably baby boomers or maybe the Gen X's that have these businesses and how to deal with the millennials. Like there's a dealing with the millennial thing and and how that kind of works. And and he made up a good point. He was like, look, the generations swing back and forth. So baby boomers will understand millennials better than Gen X will understand the millennials or the baby boomers, but Gen X will understand Gen Z better because it the pendulum goes back and forth. What one verse we get way over on this side, we swing back to the other way. And so Gen Z, Gen Z is a little more, whatever, get over it, move on. And that's kind of our generation. So we will understand that generation better than we will the ones closest to us because of the fact that the pendulum goes back and forth between generations. So um he made a lot of good points about it, is that you know, we have we have different ways of thinking of things, and you have to you have to kind of bridge the gap there a little bit and understand them too. You can't just have the you just can't have it your way. You have to come to their on their terms a little bit and understand their way of thinking as well. So anyway, so what the generations got right, the baby boomers are very loyal and committed. Um X is very deep um and independent. The millennials are emotionally aware and very much in communication, they want to talk about their things, which is why we probably don't get along with them that well because we are don't talk about it, you just move on. And then the Gen Z are boundaries and authentic, like maybe we're more authentic too in that regard.

Jackie 18:15

So every generation Yeah, but their authentic's a little different.

Jennifer 18:19

I know. There's a bridge. There's a bridge.

Jackie 18:22

We love you, we love you. It just's a little different.

Jennifer 18:26

And then uh, so every generation is fixing something that that the one of them, this generation before, struggled with. So, you know, we are pretty independent. We're maybe the baby boomers weren't so independent. We were a little more rooted in authenticness than they are because they kind of lived in some sort of don't tell everybody their generation. So every generation has something it brings to it, it fixes something from before and then it slides back, and that's my be away. It goes like this the pendulum goes back and forth. Every generation is fixing the other generation's situation. So we we just wanted to talk about it. We wanted to make sure that you know you understand that friendships, this is about friendships, that they have different languages and don't judge them. You gotta recognize them. And adapting isn't losing yourself, it's really just creating the group of friendships to have that when we can get on their level, we can see it from their perspective. It's easier to relate to them than just to say, you have to change because I only do it this way, which is where you find all these problems. Um, you kind of have to give and take a little bit, don't you think, Jack? Yep, definitely. So anyways, okay, so we're gonna go into bestie rapid fire questions and we'll see. We'll go back and forth, Jackie. Here's the first one. Do you think loyalty is more important than communication?

Jackie 19:40

Um, I think they go hand in hand. Yeah. I mean, loyalty is important, but communication is kind of I think communication is kind of part of loyalty in a way. So I I think they're both important. Does that make sense?

Jennifer 19:56

Yeah, I think they're both important too.

Jackie 19:58

I think though that somebody that at least if you're communicating, then you're being loyal because you need to tell you to communicate how you're feeling.

Jennifer 20:06

Sure. I think for me, loyalty is more important than communicating. I you have my back, whether I talk to you about it or not. For me, that is more important than that.

Jackie 20:17

I guess I'm reading this wrong. No, it's okay.

Jennifer 20:20

It's just it's just the perspective of it is like, you better be better have my back if I don't talk to you next week. You still have my back, you know what I mean, kind of thing. But communication, you can't have a friendship without communication. There is no doubt about that. So you must communicate. You have to. All right, Jack, you're next.

Jackie 20:35

Okay, would you rather talk things out immediately or take space and come back later?

Jennifer 20:40

I'm more of a take space sometimes. Need perspective on it. Otherwise, I can get hot, hot-headed. Hot hot headed?

Jackie 20:48

Yeah, I can get hot quick too. I mean, not like the Mormon Wives Hot, where like that Taylor who freaks out and is gonna kick everybody's ass, but not now, but let's say not gonna be your friend and going to like, I'm gonna come go get her in.

Jennifer 21:04

Okay, well, let's talk about that Jackie that was 17. She'd be more like, I'm gonna kick your ass.

Jackie 21:08

Like Well, that would have been me. Then I would have been Taylor, but I'm not that person anymore at 53.

Jennifer 21:13

I get it.

Jackie 21:14

Now I look at her and going, oh my gosh, did I sound like that?

Jennifer 21:18

I know, right? But we do. I think we, you know, sometimes you gotta take perspective in space, right? So, like, just like we were talking about the grid bridging gaps in the generations, like take a minute, take a step back, think about it, maybe think about their perspective for a minute.

Jackie 21:34

So when you're coming into it, I feel like you just don't want to say the wrong thing because you're too yeah, upset.

Jennifer 21:40

Yeah, you get we can get hot headed pretty quickly. So that's for me. Okay, Jack, what do you do you expect your friends to check in regularly?

Jackie 21:48

Yes, because I do it. I'll I'll just throw out the little text as hey, just checking in, how's everybody doing? or Yeah. I'm sorry everybody, I didn't I haven't slept well the last two nights, so I sound a little raspy.

Jennifer 22:00

Sexy. She's a little uh steepy.

Jackie 22:02

Just want to throw that out there. I had wasn't partying last night real hard. Just lack of sleep at 56.

Jennifer 22:08

Not a good, not a good look for us at 56. We need our sleep.

Jackie 22:12

I believe in checking in.

Jennifer 22:13

So checking in, yeah, but not like daily.

Jackie 22:16

Not like every week or daily. I mean, it's sometimes we can go a couple weeks. Yeah. Because everybody's busy. We all have lives. Yeah.

Jennifer 22:22

So and sometimes we just look up and we're like, I haven't seen, I haven't talked to them in a while. I might just send something. We'd send memes, you know.

Jackie 22:27

Like even I even thought about this morning. One of our girlfriends, I need to check because she just got put on a um a prescription that I told her, yes, definitely take it. Because she was questioning if she should. And I actually thought about it because I wasn't sleepy last night. So I was like, I need to call and check on her and see if she tried it out and how it's working for her.

Jennifer 22:44

Yep. That's awesome. You need to do that. Yeah.

Jackie 22:46

Okay, the next one. Have you ever ended a friendship without a conversation?

Jennifer 22:50

Yeah.

Jackie 22:51

Yes, definitely.

Jennifer 22:52

Yeah.

Jackie 22:53

Talk about it. And that's not ghosting.

Jennifer 22:55

Yeah, it's ghosting, but I don't think it's a good idea. I think it happens in the conversation. In the red friendship I'm thinking about, there was really never a conversation, but it needed a conversation because there's a lot of unanswered questions there, a lot of leftover feelings. And if I'm having them, for sure they're having them too. Like, let's put it to bed. Let's give it a funeral. Let's say goodbye to each other and let's move on with some peace. And if you don't do that, I think it's you know, I'd rather put peace with it than deal with nothing. I don't do well in that world, but you know, for some people that is the way they protect themselves. Cut you off, I don't want to talk to you anymore. Okay, then we'll deal with it that way. So that's kind of how I think about that. Okay, Jack, do you believe friendships should last forever?

Jackie 23:42

If they're good, definitely.

Jennifer 23:44

Yeah. But not all of them are. They're worth it.

Jackie 23:47

Not all of them are worth it, but yeah. If they are, then definitely.

Jennifer 23:50

Yeah. But a lot of people are just for moments, time. Like they're not forever.

Jackie 23:55

So seasons, remember? We've talked about that. They're seasonal friends.

unknown 24:00

Okay.

Jackie 24:01

What bothers what bothers you more? Not hearing from a friend or being overwhelmed by too much communication.

Jennifer 24:07

Not hearing. Yeah, not hearing from a friend bothers me more, maybe.

Jackie 24:12

I guess so. I guess it'd be overwhelming for. If there's too much communication, it just means that I'm just gonna like not talk to you because you're just too much for me. It's more like you're not my friend, anyways. You would know if you're too much for me.

Jennifer 24:26

Sorry, is that wrong?

Jackie 24:28

You might get all of a sudden, like, notice that I'm gonna start being very short with you and I'm gonna be like not talking to you as much because I ain't got the time.

Jennifer 24:37

But there is a generation, Jackie. We're not hearing from a friend is fine for us. We're the generation after us, the millennials, they are probably very okay with you communicating quite quite often with them because they're talking through their stuff and they're you know analyzing your situation more.

Jackie 24:53

So well, if they know me well, they'll know how to communicate with me.

Jennifer 24:59

Okay, Gen or millennials, you probably don't want to talk the Gen X's about their communication too much. We're not we're not really we haven't really grown up that way, so it's harder for us. It's like get over it, you'll be fine.

Jackie 25:10

When we lost our telephones on the wall, we don't talk as much anymore. When we got these phones that we could text, we look when we look at the phone and it's ringing, we like man, do I need answer that?

Jennifer 25:22

Yeah.

Jackie 25:23

I'll call back. Let's be honest.

Jennifer 25:26

Just text me if you want to do something. It ends this shortly. Like, you know. Texting is a beautiful thing because it's just like we had a call. Imagine being our generation. Hello, is Jackie there? Jackie's brother be like, the phone's like ready, then she grab it. Hello.

Jackie 25:42

You hear it, you hear it like clink on the counter.

Jennifer 25:46

And then you hear the whole family in the background watching TV, yelling at each other and like, you know, cursing at each other. Hey, it's for you. You and Jackie walk up the stairs, walk over to her phone, pick it up. Hey, you're like, hey, this is Jen. I was just wondering, did you do your homework? Or whatever.

Jackie 26:07

You're like, What are you picking me up for school tomorrow?

Jennifer 26:11

She's like, I'll pick you up at eight. Okay. All right, bye, bye. The whole process. That was it. I'm telling you, there was like maybe eight to nine minutes. We had a red dress. Eight to nine minutes of our lives to just now we text, be like, hey, are you picking me up tomorrow? Yeah, at eight. Okay, bye. Like it ended it. But all those that's the difference in the generation. We had the phones. I know. I hear I hear actually there are parents going back to phones for their kids because they were trying to get them off the the cell phones. They're giving them phones in their rooms now so they can talk to their friends just like they did. So interesting how ready? Are you more likely to work through issues or walk away when it feels off? Jack.

Jackie 26:52

Walk away when it feels off.

Jennifer 26:54

Yeah, me too.

Jackie 26:56

Or too old to work through issues.

Jennifer 26:58

Issues are too too complicated as we get older. Like we've had a thing too.

Jackie 27:03

I just don't want to think about it too much. I guess get too anxious these days.

Jennifer 27:07

Yeah.

Jackie 27:07

I don't want to think. Okay. Do you think younger generations expect too much from friendships?

Jennifer 27:13

I think they are more coddled than we were. I'll give it that. They are more coddled with their emotions than we were ever coddled with our emotions. So for us, I think it's not that they expect too much from their friendships. It's expecting too much from us as a generation to relate to them. It's harder for us because we're not built that way. Just like our parents were not built a certain way. We're just not as emotionally, we don't talk about that kind of stuff the way they talk about it. So from a friendship perspective, the younger generations may expect something different than what we are able to give freely. And it's hard for us to change because it's a foreign language to us talking about all of our emotions. I mean, can you imagine from just like our perspective as kids, like calling each other and being like, How did you feel today when so-and-so said I mean it was more like a F that bitch and I'm gonna kick her ass next time I see her? Like, we didn't deal dive into our emotions, we just sort of skirted them out and be like, You don't need to worry about that bitch, I'll kick her ass tomorrow. So we moved on to from it pretty quickly. We didn't deal with a lot of it, but we made it through, right?

Jackie 28:23

So you walked by her in school and you had a sign holding it, bitch.

Jennifer 28:28

We were loyal. I mean, we were loyal bitches.

Jackie 28:30

I made my point. Or you're gonna be like, she walks by you next time and she turns her head, doesn't look at you.

Jennifer 28:38

I know, right? Like, don't talk to me. We were loyal, we're loyal friends, so that's where we got that from. That they'd be like, let's talk about. I we just wouldn't, it would not be normal for us to do, so it just would be hard. So you have to expect you have to respect the generational gap there that it is different. So okay, do you think older generations settle too much in friendships?

Jackie 28:58

No, older generations.

Jennifer 28:59

That's awesome.

Jackie 29:00

My parents don't have a lot of my friends don't have a lot of friends, so they have like family and my dad'll make friends fishing, but they don't like make friends anymore. They're not looking for outside perspective. Yeah. Uh-huh. They've been like that for a long time. My dad's the one who'll make friends with old guys fishing, but he's not even allowed to bring them home. Mom won't let him bring them home to play or anything.

Jennifer 29:25

He's like, might see you next week over here on this uh I'll meet you here at 10 o'clock.

Jackie 29:30

And I'm not allowed to have the phone to text you, so just meet me here. The wife has the phone.

Jennifer 29:35

Okay, but let me ask you this from this perspective, because this is this is we are the older generation to the millennials and the Gen Z. So do you think that we settle too much in our friendships what they think as important from their perspective?

Jackie 29:51

No, I think about my friends are my my kids all appreciate my friendships that I have, like with you guys and stuff.

unknown 29:58

Good.

Jackie 29:58

Yeah, they I think they respect it. I mean, I have a my son, like, you know, I think I have one son that really well, both my sons, they have a lot of they have multiple friends like I do. You know, my one youngest one has a lot of friends, like has a big friend group like we did. Yeah. Like he had the five best friends that they all, you know, had their graduation together. Right. When they got out of high school, kind of the same kind of thing as like our friendship. And the girls have um like, yeah, they have a a group of friends, they both have have a lot of group of friends that they had, and like um my oldest still like hangs out with her little from college with their kids. Like they do stuff all the time. Yeah, and and I think it was a another little or another friend from nursing or it was from their college. So yeah, they all have their friends too, the same kind of thing.

Jennifer 30:42

That's good.

Jackie 30:43

Yeah, and like our other daughter, like she's had a friend that she's had since elementary school. Yeah, so and my other son, same thing. He has his friends that he still hangs out since elementary school.

Jennifer 30:54

Right.

Jackie 30:55

So they respect it. They don't never say anything negative about it.

Jennifer 30:58

That's good. I think too that they appreciate sometimes the the to have those friends and they know they're watching over you too, that they have a that's what I was gonna say next.

Jackie 31:08

Yeah, they know that they're there for for for me. You know what I mean? Yeah, like if I have something happen, they know that you guys are there.

unknown 31:16

Right.

Jennifer 31:16

Which is which is good. I mean, my son is the same my sons are the same way. Like friend there was a big emphasis on friendship in in my world, so there's a you know, they had that perspective too that friendships are important because they're important to do. So you're you're definitely getting that from your parents as well.

Jackie 31:32

Because I didn't get that from my parents. Pretty much their friends are just our family.

Jennifer 31:36

Right. Right.

Jackie 31:37

That wasn't really anything.

Jennifer 31:38

Yeah, my mom had friends. She always had like girlfriends and stuff, and you know, I spent time with them too. So I lost strong emphasis on friendship as well. So um okay, last one, Jack. Go ahead.

Jackie 31:51

Oh, let's see. Be honest. Are you evolving or staying exactly the same in how you show up as a friend? I think I show up as a friend.

Jennifer 31:59

Yeah. I don't think I'm the same. I can evolve a little bit, but I'm not gonna get too far off of it. And I'll tell you why. Because I'm a good friend. Like I'm not adjusting my plan too much because it's not like I'm having issues with being a friend. I may not be the greatest friend for every generation because of the way I am. Kind of a no bullshit kind of girl. So that might be a little bit of a problem, but on the other hand, it is what it is. Like you can't all be the same kind of friends. Like you need some perspective too, right? Different friendships show you different perspectives, different people. Like the one that I just called to get some emotional support that told me you'll be fine. Different perspective, right? She just that's just how she is. Like, okay, I'm fine.

unknown 32:43

Like, okay, I'm good.

Jennifer 32:45

Like, you know, so that's how she shows up, that's who she is. Why would she change that? I would be very I'd be very strange for her to be like, let's talk about it. Like, I don't even know if we could even get into that. It's like it would be so I know.

Jackie 32:58

I think I'd freak out. I'd be like, No, that isn't what I'm wanting, that's not what I wanted you to say. Oh get over it, you're fine. Get a beer. What what are you saying?

Jennifer 33:09

Go get her 12 pack, something's wrong. He's way off here. You know who we're talking about too. Like, something is way off here. I don't know what she's talking about. I'm calling her again. Too much. So, anyways, you're from you are who you are, so show up as that person because sometimes people need you to be that person and they don't need you to be some other version of it. You'll find another friend for that version. So, all right. So, friendship doesn't get worse, it doesn't get weaker, it just gets different. So, each generation, they love the best the way they know how, they fix what they that didn't work from the generation before, and they create something new. So, maybe the goal isn't to decide which one is right, maybe it's just to understand them all so can so we can all actually connect. All right, if this episode hit you in the fields or made you laugh way too hard, we consider that a win.

Jackie 33:51

Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with your ride or die.

Jennifer 33:54

And when you're ready to make your friendship official, book your best of money at rhinestoneweddingchapel.com.

Jackie 33:59

Because the best love stories don't always come with a ring.

Song 34:23

Reuniting's like we never been apart, and every single time we're out of iron heart to heart. What you made a big enough to dump a big spray in the boy every day.