Slightly Unsupervised | Female Friendship and Realtalk |Best Friends Podcast

Unlocking Bestie Energy: The Power of Female Friendship

Jennifer Hobbs & Jackie Schroeder | Best Friends Podcast Hosts Season 1 Episode 56

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 37:41

Send us Fan Mail

What exactly is Bestie Energy—and why do some friendships feel like home?

In this episode of Slightly Unsupervised, Jennifer and Jackie explore the meaning behind the phrase "Bestie Energy" and why female friendship may be one of the most important relationships in our lives.

From Oprah and Gayle to Lucy and Ethel, Monica and Rachel, and even Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez, they break down different friendship energy styles and what makes certain friendships stand the test of time.

They also share stories from Bestiemony®, their friendship ceremony created to celebrate platonic soulmates and the women who help us survive life's biggest challenges. Along the way, they discuss friendship support, chosen family, emotional safety, loyalty, jealousy, competition, and the green flags that signal you've found your person.

Plus, hear highlights from the inspiring friendship stories of Bonnie & Brenda and Mandi & Billie, two best friend pairs whose journeys remind us why friendship deserves recognition.

If you've ever had a ride-or-die best friend, lost one, or are still looking for one, this episode is a reminder that some of the greatest love stories of our lives aren't romantic—they're friendships.

In this episode:
• What Bestie Energy really means
• Friendship green flags and red flags
• Why female friendship matters as we get older
• Chosen family and platonic soulmates
• Friendship support and emotional safety
• Bestiemony friendship stories
• The power of lifelong best friends

🎧 New episodes weekly.

💜 Share this episode with your best friend.

💍 Learn more about Bestiemony® at RhinestoneWeddingChapel.com/Bestiemony


Chickology Podcasts
Bold podcasts by women, for women. Real talk. Real growth.

Bestiemony®
Honor your forever friendship with a Bestiemony®.

Rhinestone Wedding Chapel
Weddings, Elvis, & Bestiemony® ceremonies—only in Nashville at Rhinestone Chapel.

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

This episode of Slightly Unsupervised was brought to you by the creators of Bestiemony®—the original friendship ceremony that proves soulmates don’t always come with a marriage license. Hosted by Jennifer and Jackie: best friends, business partners, and co-founders of the movement celebrating real, ride-or-die love.

💍 Book a Bestiemony: rhinestoneweddingchapel.com/bestiemony
📱 Follow us on Instagram at @Bestiemonies
📩 Got a bestie story to share or a subject request? Email us at ChickologyPodcasts@gmail.com

Jennifer

Hey there, I'm Jennifer.

Jackie

And I'm Jackie.

Jennifer

And welcome to Slightly Unsupervised. We're best friends, business partners, and the chaos behind festimony, a ceremony we created to celebrate the kind of soulmates who don't come with a marriage license.

Jackie

This podcast is all about that friendship energy, the deep stuff, the messy stuff, and the laugh till you snort stuff. So whether you're driving, folding laundry, or hiding in your car for some peace and quiet, you're in good company. Let's get slightly unsupervised. All right, today, what exactly is the bestie energy? Apparently the internet has a new phrase. Bestie energy, you've probably heard it. People use it on social media all the time. That's bestie energy. She gives bestie energy. We all need more bestie energy. But all but what does it actually mean? The unofficial social des definition of bestie energy is a close, supportive, positive friendship that feels safe, authentic, and uplifting. In other words, it's that person, the one you call first, the one who already knows the backstory, the one who can make you laugh when you're crying, the one who tells you the truth even when you don't want to hear it. Today we're talking about bestie energy. How do you know when you found it? Can you can you create it? And why do some friendships have it while others don't?

Jennifer

Yeah, so let's just talk let's just start with the definition. When you hear the words bestie energy, you know, what comes to mind? Um I'm gonna be honest. It's it it for me when I see it or I'm around it, it's like two humans in absolute sync who don't even finish a conversation and have a full conversation. Like, like they've they're in touch with each other so much, the best energy is so strong that there's just words said and then they understand each other exactly what the other one has said, and there is no finishing of the sentence that everybody else has no idea what's going on. But you you can see that they are so in sync with each other and they have the same, they're talking on the same wavelength that you just know that these two humans, or however many humans there are obviously there's more than one in some instances, but they they are just in sync. Like they have their own little language, I think. I mean, have you seen somebody that's in bestie energy, Jackie? I mean, we can't talk about our energy because we're not we can't see it or in it, right? But have you ever seen anybody in us?

Jackie

Do you? Because I do see it in us. But uh Yeah, I'll see it in some younger people. Yeah, I don't see it as much with old uh people our age, but no No, I don't. It's funny. I see it with us, but uh No, I don't with our age. It's funny. Yeah, that's it. But I do with the younger people these days.

Jennifer

That's good. That's a good sign. I mean, I think that you know, one of the things you and I said on, at least I said on to when I started this bestimony idea, this best friend thing, is that it's our job as the older generation to warn the younger generation that this bestie thing is important and that you need to pay attention to this and that you need to, you know, really pay attention to who your best friend is and nurture that because it's important later, especially in life.

Jackie

So yeah, I guess I could say when we did our bestimony, when we did the uh the show the best with the with the friends, you could see it with those people. That's right. With a bunch of the best friends.

Jennifer

Yeah.

Jackie

But that's probably the first time I'd seen that in a while.

Jennifer

Yeah, we get a bunch of best friends together. You can feel the energy between them. And it was interesting because even when we did the filming, I know we're working on this thing where we're gonna try to go from city to city at some point and do these bestie stories with people because I think we want I want to tell these stories. Like I think they're so important for women and so many people that you realize that these best friends are, you know, such a vital part of your existence that, you know, I I'm willing to take the road and go see people and come come have them do their stories with us. But we had that really ex unique experience, and there's what, maybe there was 10 of us, 10 different groups of best friends. I don't remember how many were in there, but it was an energy in that room of love and support and laughter and community. And even though we didn't know any of them prior to that filming, and we had no energy, we had no time with them before that, it was a special place to witness that. That I feel like you're right, there was a lot of bestie energy in there, but there was a lot of bestie energy and a lot of support for being a bestie, right? Like I know how you feel because I feel that way too. It's not, you're not Jackie's not my best friend, but you know, maybe it was Mandy and Billy. Billy's my best friend and I feel that way with her, like you feel that way with her. Like they could you could understand it, even in hearing their bestie done, you know, their test of yeah to each other about how they loved each other, even if it was not something you and I had said, because you and I went first, so we had to be the guinea pigs on that one. But as they went on and we could hear them, you could, you know, we'd look at each other and be like, that's us too, right? So things that we didn't think about saying to each other, but we knew when we heard it that that's us too, that's how we are too. So it was certainly just a beautiful thing. But yes, you're right, there was a lot of bestie energy there. And if you can get around it and suck it in, it's pretty fun. It's a nice experience to have. And hopefully we'll do some. So, anyways, I kind of went through the internet and I wanted to kind of talk about it a little bit about how besty energy is. So I'm thinking of best friends that we can all relate to. Some of these people will make sense to you, some of it won't, depends on your age. But these are famous best friends. And I have two of them that I could think of that were in real life best friends, and then the rest of them are made-up best friends, but they have an energy, right? There's a type of energy. So I said, Well, what about what is Oprah and Gail? Oprah Winfrey and Gail. Gail King. Gail King, what their energy is. And and they and she said it's an anchor energy. And I looked it up, I kind of read through it. But what it basically was saying is that before Oprah was Oprah, she had Gail. And Gail is Oprah's anchor. So, and I'm sure that Oprah is Gail's anchor, but before I'm famous, before I blow up into this huge personality, famous personality, here's this person that has been her anchor, right? Person that's gone beside her and and kept her grounded and kept her remembering who she was before all these things happened. Reminds her to go back and look at who she was before all of her fame happened, so that she always stays anchored in that. So they kind of think of Oprah and Gail as an anchor energy. I can see that. Can you see that, Jackie? Like you could see how that could be super important. So then I went to Lucy and Ethel. Now I know a lot of you that don't know I love Lucy. It was a it was something that we watched a lot as a kid. At least I did. Did you watch that show?

Jackie

I don't know Oprah and Gail either. That's true. I don't know. Can you say Jennifer and Jennifer Annisteen and uh what's her Courtney? Monica and Rachel, they're one of them too. Yeah, Monica and Rachel. Yeah.

Jennifer

But uh growing up, we had Lucy and Ethel, right? They were best friends. They were. I mean, and in life, they were best friends too. They were really were best friends. If you do some studying about Ethel and Lucy, they'll tell you that they were really fun. But Lucy and Ethel had adventure energy, they were always up to no good and were always getting in trouble. And uh I invite you to go watch I Love Lucy if you have not watched those two, because even though it was a show, if you read about a lot about Lucy, Lucy Silball, there's a lot written by her, she'll tell you that Ethel it the energy was correct. It was not they couldn't fake that, they were actually friends in life, and so that's how we felt that is that that energy between them was true. It just translated so well on film that it was it was actually a show, but we really were friends, which brings me to my next best friends, Monica and Rachel. Same thing. Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox in life are best friends, so their energy on just on the screen translated. That's why it was so impactful to us. But they have a growth energy because originally Rachel moved in with Monica, right? Because she ran away from getting married. Remember that in the beginning? And so she landed up being a part or a roommate with Monica and then grew. Like they grew together and they grew up together. So that's kind of their energy. Of course, there's Them and Louise. We've already talked about them, they're ride or die, and they did ride and they did die. So their energy is true.

Jackie

But we don't say take that route. Please don't take that route.

Jennifer

But that if you see that show, Them and Louise, you're gonna know they ride and die together. So that they were claws by the end of that thing, and they were off running from Louis.

Jackie

Brad Pitt was in that one. Brad Pitt, that's where he started.

Jennifer

So the only other friends that I can think of in the younger generation, and I'm sorry, y'all, if you're very young, um, that I don't know your group, I don't know who your stars are, I don't know. But I do know, I think that Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez might be best friends. I think they've had best energy before. So I asked them what that was, and she said that's a safe harbor energy because those two got famous as children and grew up in that environment. And so for them, that you know what they're saying is that's a safe harbor. That's somebody who understands this explosion of popularity. Uh you're safe because you're not trying to latch on to me to be famous. We're just in the same boat, kind of thing. So there's anchor energy, adventure energy, growth energy, safe harbor energy, and ride or die energy. Those are the ones I can come up with, famous people. And I gotta say, if we're gonna talk about you and I, anchor energy, 100%. Adventure energy, 100%. Growth energy, absolutely. Safe harbor energy, yes. Rider die energy, yes. We have all those things, don't you think? I can't think of one aspect of those energy types that does not relate to the two of us. And I'm not saying that those energy relate doesn't relate to these groups. That's just what they kind of came up with as far as their energy style. So any of those things can be true. You know, safe harbor energy for Jackie and I, that's our childhood. And finding each other in kind of a chaotic world that we were safe, harbored, and then of course we went on ventures and you know, hid from the law as well as we were kids. But we've also grown, you know, there's a lot of growth energy, and and honestly, the anchoring energy, if you don't have that in your best friend, I don't know how you don't survive. That's important. Somebody who's just there, like and we're we're in that together. So I think that finding your energy is is important, but understanding your energy too. So, Jaggy, do you want to kind of go through these things about how bestie energy is explained? What what are some things to you think that two best besties can do?

Jackie

Some yeah, some friends require constant explanation, some don't. Finishing each other's sentences, which of course we say we do that all the time. Yeah. Or we don't. We kind of start it, but we know we kind of know what the other one's gonna say, so we don't say anything. Whereas people don't even realize what we're saying, then. Like I said, we've got a pull card and we both start laughing, and then people are like, What are they laughing at? They didn't even say anything. Now that's real friendship. Yeah, that's what that's friendship. Yeah, that is a hundred percent about that. Yeah, and we're sorry to everybody that has to deal with that. I know that's just us. We try on here to like finish our sentences because we're aware of doing that. But like And sometimes by the time we're done laughing, we don't even know what we were talking about. Yes. So that's true. We apologize for that.

Jennifer

Because we have menopause. In menopause, you forget everything. So we don't even know what we were laughing about, but it moved on.

Jackie

So and knowing moods instantly. Okay. I can I can fully tell you. Like, I know John. Right? I know when she says certain things, I can tell when she's angry, I can tell when she's annoyed when she's about ready to go. It's like something, she's just very short. Like, okay, like she's something, just let it go.

Jennifer

Just let it go.

Jackie

Just let her just she's on something, she's gonna go on to something else. Just let it just this is what's gonna happen. Right. And I don't take it personally. It's just it is I I think if it would have been when we were teenagers, it would have irritated the crap out of me. Right. But at the age we are now, right? It's just like it is what it is. It's just I know what what it is. You've got so much on your plate, you've got so much going through your mind that it just I let the moment go. I let you go.

Jennifer

Absolutely. My high my mind is like a highway. Woo!

Jackie

Like, and it's going right direction. I could have, I could have said something important to you, and this has happened. Like, I just was in in Nashville with her. Yeah. And there's a few things that I said to her. I was just talking to her, and then all of a sudden she said something to me, and I was like, That's what I just said. You didn't hear me. No. And then I was just like, okay, just let it go because she sounds something else.

Jennifer

Apologize that the mine is a fluid place that it goes, but I pick up on it and maybe I tuck it away for future reference, and then I forget where the reference came from. So then I come back to it and I'm like, ah, here's a great idea. You're like, yeah, I already told you that like three days ago. Don't ask. Thank you for understanding.

Jackie

Or I can just tell, like, when you're when you're mad, or you're just not not mad, but you're just irritated with something, and you'll just just by what you say. And so I'm just like, okay, I just get quiet. Just like, okay, let her get through this. And in a few minutes, she'll be fine. She'll figure it out.

Jennifer

And I can do that. All these things I could do with you too. But I can in your mood situation, I can tell by the when when I call you, or there's a hey, the the hey, I can tell where we're going. We're on a good day, we're on a bad day, whatever. It's coming. I can tell just by the word.

Jackie

Or what about a podcast? I'm not interested in the what we're talking about.

Jennifer

So I've had Jackie re-record things because I'm like, look, lady, I listened to that, and you were so far distance on this. We're re recording. So she's like, Oh, sorry. And I'm like, Yeah, it's fine. You got to get more enthusiastic about these things.

Jackie

So I'm like, I wasn't interested. She's like, Yeah, no, I know, I can tell. You have to do it though. Which comes right back with the understanding without words. Right.

Jennifer

Right. Oh, yeah.

Jackie

It's kind of with what we were just talking about.

Jennifer

Can we show the story when you were there? Because shoot Jackie was just in Nashville. It's kind of a cute story. So her husband had to come to my chapel one day and he was doing a work call. And so he was in a one in our reception space. So Jackie and I like went in to bother him. Like we knew it, right? Like we went in and he's like, Are you two just gonna stand here the whole time? We're like, Yeah. Yeah. Totally knew what she was trying to do. She's trying to irritate him because she was mad he was working, and I'm like, right along with her. And he's like, I don't think you two are gonna stand here the whole time. You need to go do something.

Jackie

He wasn't supposed to work on this day, by the way. I know. That's when she got mad. Very irritated. We were supposed to go out for the day and do stuff. And at this point, it's like the end of the day.

Jennifer

But she asked me to go, right? Let's go stand in there. I knew exactly what we were doing. We were going in there to irritate the shit out of him because she was mad. And I was like, yeah, let's go. And so we got really mad at us.

Jackie

At 56 years old, we're doing like that.

Jennifer

So then we we go to Starbucks. I'm like, fine, we'll go to Starbucks, we'll be back. So we left and went to Starbucks and came back. And then when you were sitting there, remember Jackie and you're like, we should because these, these, this room has rolled up glass doors. So you can see inside. She goes, we should go stand outside and watch him now, like outside the glass doors. I'm like, yes. But we couldn't because it rained, so we didn't. Oh no, I got a bunch of phone calls or I did.

Jackie

I went. I went. And he just gave me like he looked at me and he pointed at his computer. I'm still on a call.

Jennifer

I know. You're like, I know. Like, so we were definitely in cahoots to irritate her husband, which I'm sure he really appreciated. Anyway, say understand without words 100%.

Jackie

Yes, yes. And then feeling emotionally safe. Yeah. Definitely.

Jennifer

Definitely.

Jackie

And talking about that, we uh I mean, recently I've been through some stuff and definitely Yeah, 100%.

Jennifer

You know, it's like somebody that you feel like, you know, I'm gonna call you and it I'm gonna be okay with that. Like it's gonna be okay. This person is gonna get it. And we don't we don't have to go into detail about it, but it just somebody that's gonna pick it up, move it forward, and take care of it for you. So a hundred percent. And and for me too, Jack. I mean, shit, like how many times do I call and I'm like upset or mad about something or whatever. And I'm like, Jackie, I'm gonna tell you this right now. Make sure you remind me next time I do something like this. And she's like, I got you. I'll remember, like, you know, just to to express the aggravation of something and tell you that remind me when I want to do something like this again, don't let me do it. You know what I mean? Like just for you to know all my thoughts in my head and be very vulnerable with you and tell you all these things, and then actually entrusting that you're going to help me get through some of these things again. That's around just emotional safety. Like, it's your person. You're not I could say the most unhinged thing. Jackie says the most unhinged things to me, and neither one of us are like holding that against each other because we are so in tune with how we think that it's not even doesn't even sound unhinged to me. I'm sure it doesn't sound unhinged to you because that's how we think. We're talking about our internal head that we do. So these friendships, like, you know, they're just effortless. I don't know how to say it. Um, we wanted just to talk a few, because we've done this this YouTube channel and the best of bonus. If you want to ever get on there, you can see some of these best friend stories, and we're certainly trying to highlight that now because we're gonna kind of veer into that more this sting. But there were two best friends that were there, and we're just gonna talk about them real quickly because there's stories on YouTube, and we want you to definitely go check it out because the power is in their story, it's not in us telling you about it, it's really in them having their own words about it. But Bonnie and Brenda, do you remember them, Jackie?

Jackie

Yes, they were so cute, and they had the cutest outfits.

Jennifer

They're the only ones that dressed up as twins, and they they're actually sisters, they're not twins, but they're sisters. I think they're only like a year and a half apart or something like that. So they have bestie energy that is so contagious. And I'm gonna tell you, I'm not gonna give it away, but they're on their 60s tour, so they're doing a bunch of things together in their 60s that they've always wanted to do, and they're having a grand tile time doing it. But they were sisters and they did not like each other for the first 50 years. I mean, they they came into it later in life to be back together. It's a really beautiful story to listen to because it's two sisters that hated each other. Their mother committed suicide when they should they were younger, and they were sort of pitted against each other in this world to survive with their father. They think there's three sisters. But, anyways, their story is a fascinating thing. But they are they found each other later. It's so fun to watch them because they are genuinely very happy, very in tune with each other, and having the best time. And and that's a recovery story that's that's a beautiful one to see, a beautiful one to watch. But you want to see some bestie energy, I suggest you you watch them too because they have that energy to together and they will make you laugh.

Jackie

Laugh, definitely.

Jennifer

Yeah, they are I don't know about their outfits. I don't know if we're ever get to I don't know if we're ever dressed like twins, Jack, but let's not put it past ourselves.

Jackie

Yes. I'll dress all in black for you. So my style.

Jennifer

I'm like goth, but I don't really have a gothic gothic energy. I don't know about that. So anyways, and then uh the only other one I wanted to talk about too, and I we can't go through all of them because there's so many of them, is Mandy and Billy. They were there as well, and they have a lifetime relationship that is worth watching. And I certainly invite you to do that as well. They've been friends since four, three or four when they're on the met each other on the swing sets. So definitely a um definitely something to go watch, go see what you think, see if you have some bestie energy. We just should we talk about Jackie just a minute about uh what a bestie energy is not, because I think that's important too, right? There is what it is and what it's not. And the first thing I can think of that you and I do not do is compete with competition. Yeah, competition. You can't compete with each other. You can compliment each other. What Jackie's strengths are are not my strengths, right? What my strength is is not Jackie's strength. And we don't compete. I will give my energy where it needs to be the dominant, and Jackie will do the same on her side when it needs to be the dominant where we're in a situation that we need it. And it's not a competition, it's a compliment, it's a complimenting thing. Like we complement each other. It's not, you know, I don't know if we even have any of the same similar traits, Jackie, that would compete.

Jackie

Yeah, we do. But we just don't compete. We just don't try to compete. Yeah. Yeah. And I think the same thing with the with the rest of our group. We all just don't compete with each other. Right.

Jennifer

You can't you can't compete and be friends. It's a death, it's a definitely a death sentence in a friendship if you're competing with each other.

Jackie

Or if you're even a person that competes with your friends, you're you you probably don't have a lot of friends. Right. Right.

Jennifer

Because it's it's a negative energy. That's all I can tell you. Like, stop.

Jackie

It is.

Jennifer

Keeping score, no.

Jackie

Another thing, yes, definitely not.

unknown

No.

Jackie

If you keep score with your friends, you're not a friend.

Jennifer

No. It's not a good, it's not a good energy match. And just keeping score with anything, y'all. Like that's true. I drove last time. You're gonna have to drive this. Like, nothing. Shut up. Just get in your cars and drive off the damn road. Like I bought your coffee last time. I don't give a shit when you bought my coffee. Like, I'll buy like it doesn't let it go, people. There's so many other things in world the world to be worried about. It ain't about who bought the glass coffee. So stop with that creepy scorpion.

Jackie

That's or jealousy.

Jennifer

Jealousy.

Jackie

That's my biggest I hate the jealousy.

Jennifer

I do too.

Jackie

Believe me, we drop friends because of that.

Jennifer

Yeah. It's because it's a negative energy. You're breeding a negative energy into a space that's supposed to be safe. And it's like you can't be jealous. Jealous of what? What what do I have that you don't? I may have some things you don't have, Jackie, and you have things I don't have.

Jackie

Or just jealousy of other friends in the group. Yeah.

Jennifer

Yeah. We can't have five best friends that have jealousy. Yeah. Yeah, we have. Yeah.

Jackie

We've dropped friends because of being jealous. Yeah. Because it doesn't work. You can't now. And it's ridiculous. Like we all give we give we all give something to the friendship. And that's what friendship's about, you know? And we let each other, right?

Jennifer

So nobody's like trying, like you're that's your lane. You do well with that lane, you go. You do that part because I will give up any kind of reason to be involved in it. If that's something you want to do, then you go for it. I think we all have that kind of attitude. Like, and we've done that. Yeah.

Jackie

Like here's okay, like planning a a weekend or with all of us. Like, let's say, like, remember you originally you took over for Paso. Yeah. And all of a sudden, like we were like, that's probably not the best place. And you're like, okay, if you want to go ahead and do it, go ahead. You didn't take it personally. And then I took over and found another place. But there wasn't any like jealousy or anything over it. There wasn't no competition. There's no keep and score. None of that stuff. It was just like you were busy and you're like, hey, this is just what I found. But hey, Jackie, no, if you want to do it, go for it. You know what I mean? Yeah. And all of us were fine with it. Like, it wasn't any big deal. The other ones were too busy to do, do it. So they were fine with it too. So it's like, whoever can help, that's what we do.

Jennifer

Right. Exactly. Who has the time, who can dedicate to it? I'll do what I can, but obviously, you know, I can only go so far. I can't spend my entire day looking at the Virbo or Airbnb.

Jackie

Chrissy, when she had her place, she took over and said, Hey girls, I got a place for us to stay. Right. Awesome. Let's go. Right. And again, we'll always tell Chrissy, we're always willing to come back, Chris. Yeah, Chrissy has a beach house that we were. We're gonna throw that all the time out.

Jennifer

We don't have any problems going to her beach house, that's for sure. So drama, leave the drama.

Jackie

Drama, leave it away. But we will take on someone's drama if someone's bringing into our girlfriend, into our girls. Yeah. We will get rid of that drama for our girls.

Jennifer

Drama's walking in. We need to get rid of her.

Jackie

We will take it and we will get rid of it.

Jennifer

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because we swarm it. We'll get around it.

Jackie

But we won't take the drama in with our girl, like our group, within our group. But we don't put it in. You know what I mean? None of us have we don't have drama within us.

Jennifer

We're too we've had a lot of drama when we were kids. We had enough of that as we were kids, and we got it through all that stuff, so we didn't need it. But I will say that, you know, when you watching these things like the Housewives or any of these shows that go on in the So they get paid to give you drama kits. They're not even fighting that much, I bet. They they get paid to come up with drama, and that's probably so irrelevant.

Jackie

My husband watches some of these with me just to be nice because he's like, I know you want to watch it, so he'll watch it with me, which he hates it when because my daughters will be here and he'll say something like uh so like he knows what's going on. He's like, This is pretty pathetic that I know what's going on. And I say, But they're not friends because real friends don't act like this. They are friends on TV, but they're not friends in real life. Because this is not. I go, Do my me and my friends act like this? He's like, No, because they're not friends. So it's just kind of fun to watch. Not that it's real. And I go, I actually get kind of irritated with it sometimes. I do, yeah.

Jennifer

Yeah.

Jackie

Because I'm just like, this is just stupid.

Jennifer

Like it's true, but like I said, they are definitely they are definitely paid to have that drama, that level of drama to make it interesting for you.

Jackie

Because who wants to watch it if it's not?

Jennifer

But it's like it's not really like a way of and they're not even friends, not like they're just friends, they just put them on a show together and they have to be friends, and a lot of them are not gonna be friends because if you're in that industry, they're competing. There's a lot of competition in that that world.

Jackie

And I've and I've found as I'm getting older, now I'm not liking it as much as I did maybe when it started. Yeah, yeah. Now I'm starting to get like, I can stop watching this. It's they're getting boring now to me. It's like okay.

Jennifer

Same drama over and over and over again. Like you find the same thing until you get tired of it. So and constant negativity. Oh, I hate people that are constantly negative. I do too. I mean, you can be negative once in a while when you're like in a bad mood or something, you're like, I don't really like it.

Jackie

And I was going through some stuff a little while ago, and I've noticed because I'm going through menopause and I do have some bipolar. Right. And I noticed that the two were mixing with each other. I didn't notice, but I recently noticed. And I got a little negative, and I noticed that you weren't in a positive mindset all the time. I was not in a positive, and I it was kind of it'll get you negativity will get you, y'all. Like And I don't know if you guys really noticed, but then when I was kind of looking back, I'm like, I was really noticing that I was being very negative about a lot of stuff that I normally wasn't. Right. Like around about people, just different things, like everything that was irritating me. Right. And that kind of thing. And I'm a fighter. So I will fight. But now I'm out of that, people. I'm out of that. I'm back to myself. I noticed it, took care of it. I'm good. I've got my hormones set back again. Yeah, your hormones are getcha. Your hormones are getcha.

Jennifer

If you're negative and you used to be positive, go check your hormones, are y'all.

Jackie

So I'm there for you with your hormones, people. I'm here for you. I'm here. Yes.

Jennifer

So those are just some of the the traits that are really considered pretty negative. I would do an evaluation on your bestie energy. If you've got any of those, address it, get rid of it, move it along because it doesn't help in the friendship. It's hard to be it's hard to be in a positive state with someone constantly negative. So, or any of those things actually. So just just something to think about. We'll go into their bestie rapid questions, they're pretty easy, Jackie, this round. So who's more likely to call first? You or me. Me. Maybe. Depends what it is. If I have time, I might call you. I'm a little more busy with my busy. Yeah. That's true. Okay, who would forget where they park? Me. I would too though.

Jackie

So both of us. Where's the car? I do that a lot. Well, it matters where you see you you park where you can see your car mainly. I'm in California. Yeah.

Jennifer

You park where you can get a parking spot.

Jackie

I'm like far away everywhere because I also don't want door dings. So Oh yeah.

Jennifer

And if she drives so slow, there are all the cars. The people would take the parking spots which ever got there. Not me. Y'all. I would 100 miles an hour down a little lane to get my parking spot.

Jackie

Yep. I'm on my my phone when she drives because I cannot handle looking up when she's driving. Anywho.

Jennifer

So we had to get the car with me again this time. And he was probably like, Dear Lord, help us please get to where we're going safely. All right. Talk to a complete stranger. That's you. Yep. You do that. You make friends with some weird people. We've all had that.

Jackie

And my husband says it all the time. Yeah. Strange guy coming up.

Jennifer

Jackie's just made friends with him, so or girl or whatever. Couple. Could be the whole group. They can all be coming over. Jackie's gonna make friends with them. And I'm just like, who are these people, Jackie? And why are we having conversations with them? So all right, start a new project. 100%. That's me. Dear Lord. Like I said, my highway, my mind is a highway and it's it's you know bump to bump bumper to bumper traffic on it constantly. So cry during a commercial. I think both of us. You think? Yeah.

Jackie

No, I'm I'm kind of out of that now.

Jennifer

I'm on an island by myself. You've you're like, I'm not gonna cry anymore. Yeah, probably. I cry at lots of things, y'all. So commercial will be.

Jackie

I was, but I have I have I have medication now for that.

Jennifer

All right, getting everyone involved in an adventure. I'm gonna vote you. Hyped up. Jackie's a salesman, Matt. We're doing this. It's gonna be the best time ever. You're just like, okay, sounds good. You go. Be late. Telling me. I don't know. I don't think you're really that late. I'm never late. I don't like being late either, so it's not really a thing for me, but more so than you, probably.

Jackie

I'm like Yeah, I know.

Jennifer

Everything's on schedule. Jackie's her schedule, Slord. Yes.

Jackie

Bring snacks. We know who that is. That's me.

Jennifer

I'm not bringing nothing.

Jackie

Oh, we know who this one is too. Give tough love. That's Jen.

Jennifer

Yeah, I'll give you some tough love. I'll tell you. And I get in trouble for it quite a bit, but I'd rather tell you than let you lead down a pathway of destruction. So I'll give you a heads up. Okay, show up unannounced with hell. You. You. You. You.

Jackie

Well, I guess it's both of us.

Jennifer

All right, just as finish the sentence and then we'll be done.

Jackie

Jackie, bestie energy is that unfiltered and deeply comfortable vibe you only get with your ride or die. It's a laughing until it's a laughing until you cry without saying a word. We already said that. Having a million inside jokes and feeling 100% accepted. Flows, messy moments and all.

Jennifer

Yeah. 100%.

Jackie

Yeah.

Jennifer

Yeah. And well, like, I think the other thing a bestie energy is like you are afraid of the bestie when they're together because she's gonna pounce on you too, right? So like there's gotta be that that fear of like, I I'm not dealing with one of these girls. If I'm gonna have a fight with them, I'm gonna have to deal with both of them kind of thing. That's a besti energy, I think, too, is like you done mess with her. Well, you just don't. It's just there's an energy there. Okay, Jack. Jennifer, a friendship green flag is familiarity and just really being authentic. If you are really being authentic, and I'm saying some unhinged, weird shit, and you are you are really just who you are, you're laughing, you're having a good time. You know, when you get together with your bestie, those are some really like decompressing times to get rid of all the shit you carry. I think a really great deep friendship green flag is somebody who's even if I don't understand the energy, if I don't understand the person, but they seem to be authentically who they are, super important for that's to me, that's a sure sign that you're with your best friend, that you are that comfortable. So all right, Jackie.

Jackie

The thing my best friend does that always makes me laugh is her morning routine, rain or shine, drive-through garage and Starbucks. And she gets hangry. Wait, I got she's got a few things. She gets hangry. You can see it coming on, and sometimes just driving down the road, anything we could start laughing at anything hysterically together that people around us don't understand, but we both do. Yeah, totally. I couldn't just put one thing. There were just like so many things. I'm like, I could keep going, but I'm like, I have to make this short and sweet.

Jennifer

We can't go on forever with this, but that's amazing. Thank you. I appreciate it.

Jackie

But I have to tell everybody every single morning, it doesn't matter, rain or shine, she takes her car through a car wash. And I swear, these guys, I laugh at these guys that at this car wash because I'm like, they're like, here comes Psycho, here she comes. Every single day, she's gotta come through. And the Starbucks people, they know her order every single morning.

Jennifer

It's so true. Yesterday I went through the car wash, I'll have you all know it was raining. I'm like, yep, get all the dirt that was accumulated from the drive over, clean it, and then I'll, you know, today I will go back to the car wash. It's just it's a thing. I wash my car every day. And Chuck is like, I don't know if that's good for your car. I'm like, I don't care. My car looks pretty good for you know how old it is. So okay. The thing I appreciate most about my best friend is my uh ability to be who I am and have the best time doing whatever it is we do. I don't care what we're doing. We just recently had to put up window film on some stuff like all of it. It's just funner with Jack. It's just funner when she's with me and she turns anything that I don't want to do, and I do accumulate things I want don't want to do with Jack Jack until she comes. Like these are things I don't want to do. But then I really enjoy doing them. And I just feel like, you know, your help, your ability to just jump in, your jumping on my bandwagon stuff nonstop about and just like giving the support that somebody in my crazy brain needs is so important. And I just want to thank you for that because you do it all the time, and you never question me. You never question my nonsense. So thank you for that.

Jackie

And I've already ordered the film for my windows, and I'm gonna do them next week. See, I've inspired her. She has a new skill.

Jennifer

She has a new skill. All right. One of the best, one of the reasons festimonies exist is because we believe friendship deserves recognition. Not because friendship competes with the with other relationships, but because friendship matters. The women who show up, the women who stay, the women who know our stories and love us anyway. That's bestie energy, not perfection, not presence, not guarded gestures. It's consistency. It's the friend who sees you, hears you, and reminds you who you are when you've forgotten. So if you're lucky enough to have that person in your in her in your life, tell her. Tell her today because time is fleeting, but the story should be told. And the women who helped us survive deserve to know what they mean to us. We'll see you next time on Slightly Unsupervised. If this episode hit you in the feels or made you laugh way too hard, we consider that a whip.

Jackie

Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with your ride or die.

Jennifer

And when you're ready to make your friendship official, book your bestimony at rhinestoneweddingchapel.com.

Jackie

Because the best love stories don't always come with the ring. What you made a big enough to dance like the big I'll make it last time.