Teaser: The Comparison Trap: Measuring Ourselves Against Unrealistic Expectations

A few weeks ago, I hit a milestone with my podcast.

For about five minutes, I was proud of myself.

Then I opened social media.

Within seconds, I went from celebrating something meaningful to questioning everything I'd worked so hard on over the past year.

In this teaser, I'm sharing a glimpse into the very real (and very human) comparison spiral that inspired next week's episode.

Why do we compare ourselves to others so quickly?
Why does it feel so awful?
And why can our accomplishments suddenly feel smaller when we measure them against someone else's success?

Join me next week as we explore The Comparison Trap, how it affects our self-worth, and why success might have a lot more to do with our own values than anyone else's scorecard.

💜

🌐 Website: https://transformativejourneys.ca

📸 Instagram: @transformativejourneys.johanna

🎵 Music: "Back Roads" by Will Harrison (licensed through Epidemic Sound)

Transcript

Hey — missing me already?

If you're catching one of my in-between weeks, here's a little taste of what's coming next Monday.

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So… A few weeks ago, I hit a milestone with my podcast.

No… It wasn't a million downloads.

No… Spotify didn't call and offer me a giant contract.

And no… I definitely didn't suddenly become the Canadian version of Mel Robbins.

😄

What did happen was actually a lot more interesting for all of us mere mortals though. At least I thought so.

So… I hit 750 downloads – which is a milestone number on the platform I use to distribute this show.

And keep in mind, that for a tiny little indie podcast built by one totally unfamous person from Ontario, Canada…

Someone who had zero experience in any kind of broadcasting… or podcasting… before I launched it...

When it happened, it felt meaningful.

To be honest – at first it felt more than meaningful. I had been refreshing my stats like a slot machine for three days, waiting… hoping… for the number to flip to 750.

And when I finally opened my app and saw that number - I was SO excited.

More than that – I was super, super proud.

…

For about five minutes.

And then…

Well, then I made the mistake of opening social media to share my excitement in a Podcasters group I’m part of.

And within about ten seconds, I went from:

"Yay! We did it!"

To:

"Who do you think you are?"

Seriously.

Ten seconds. Maybe less…

It was like someone installed a nitro-powered engine in my limbic system and launched me head-first into a comparison spiral.

One minute I was celebrating.

And the next I was reading all of the achievements posted by other podcasters…

And questioning everything I'd worked so hard on for the past year.

Not because anything about the podcast had changed.

Not because it suddenly mattered less.

Not because it was helping fewer people.

But because for a few minutes, I forgot that my measure of success really is about more than numbers.

Ya… the number was exciting because a platform’s milestone tracker said it was – so, “here’s a bit of dopamine candy for your brain Johanna.”

But it really isn’t just a number for me. It’s 750 times I’ve maybe made someone feel less alone about something… or made them chuckle about something silly I’ve said or done… or just helped someone understand something a little better…

That’s usually my yardstick for success.

But the worst part of that little shit-show I went through?

I know better.

Here I am… literally talking about this kind of shit all the time on my podcast...

Our cognitive distortions? I understand them.

The way our nervous systems react before we have time to think about what’s really happening? Ya – I know that.

Self-worth traps and Imposter Syndrome? Been there, bought the t-shirt, and thought I knew the roadmap.

Apparently though? My brain looked at all of that information…

Turned around and said:

"Oh, that's adorable...

Here.

Try THIS experience on for size."

😄

So next week I’m going to dive into the comparison trap.

Why it happens.

Why it feels so shitty.

Why and how social media is able to pour gasoline onto our emotional dumpster fire faster than your drunk uncle at the family pig roast...

And why even when we KNOW better...

We can still find ourselves falling into that very trap – and measuring our accomplishments… and our worth… against what we see as other people’s success. 

Because maybe the comparison trap isn't really about other people.

Maybe it's about forgetting how to measure ourselves.

I'll see you next Monday.

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