WHO REMEMBERS? The UK Nostalgia Podcast

Who Remembers........The Things That Scared Us As Children?

Andrew and Liam Season 1 Episode 49

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0:00 | 45:02

What spooked you most as a kid — the thing you still feel in your chest even though you know better now? We go deep into the odd and unforgettable fears that shaped our UK childhoods: the icy prickle of the World In Action theme, the way Doctor Who’s opening could send you behind the sofa, and why the BBC Test Card felt like it might blink if you stared too long. From there, we unravel the pop-culture logic that made quicksand seem like a weekly threat and how public information films turned lakes and canals into silent traps.

We also take on the fears that were people-shaped. Jimmy Savile’s omnipresence felt wrong even before the truth surfaced; we talk about that instinct, and how certain performers carried an aura that kids picked up on. Dogs, both real and animated — from the local German shepherd to Cardinal Richelieu in Dogtanian — made streets and screens feel riskier than they were. And then the existential stuff: the Bermuda Triangle, a one-line warning about Ouija boards, and the mind-bending vastness of infinity that made “forever” sound more frightening than hellfire. If you ever lay awake trying to imagine the edge of the universe, you’ll recognise the chill.

Music and media leave their marks too. Queen’s I’m Going Slightly Mad video — black-and-white, theatrical, and threaded with the knowledge of Freddie’s illness — blurred humour and horror in a way that got under our skin. We round things out with everyday hazards that grew into legends: escalators that “suck you under,” showers that turn treacherous, and late-night Medium Wave radio drifting into unfamiliar languages that sounded like secret codes in the dark. It’s a funny, candid, and oddly comforting tour of the myths we swallowed, the truths we learned, and the shivers that never quite left.

Enjoyed the ride? Follow the show, share it with a friend who loved the Beano and dreaded quicksand, and leave a review with your most irrational childhood fear — we’ll read our favourites on a future episode.

Setting Up Childhood Fears

SPEAKER_00

Hello, welcome to Who Remembers the UK Nostalgia Podcast? In this week's episode, we are asking who remembers the things that scared us as children.

SPEAKER_01

A brief episode. Um just a thing on a cold February night.

TV Theme Terrors: World In Action

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think so. I absolutely think this is gonna be we sort of we've done a something very similar to this um when we did things on TV that scared us. And I've got a couple of things on TV that I that I forgot about that um weren't wasn't in the the Maidly podcast. But yeah, I'm gonna kick off straight away, Lynn, because I want to get this one out of the way because I mentioned it on the Maidley podcast. We're off, we're off straight away, no messing about. World and action theme tune is still the scariest thing. I mentioned it on the Maidly pod when we did things that scared us on TV. I still think this is the scariest thing that's ever been on TV. The theme tune, the opening, everything about it. I used to run behind the city and cry, and I still find it a bit creepy now.

SPEAKER_01

Didal quite organ, like church organ sort of music, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00

It's devil music. I don't want to keep I brought it up straight away because I don't want to dwell on it because um we've obviously mentioned it before, and the rest of them are things that I've not mentioned. But I'd be I'd be a liar, Liam. I'd be an absolute liar if if you were talking about things that scared us as kids and I didn't mention this again because it was.

SPEAKER_01

Well, my first one actually might be similar to yours before we get we we often start slow, so I might I might do a quick hit hit hit it and quit it like you've done to be honest.

SPEAKER_00

No, yeah, go on.

The Menace Of Jimmy Savile And Others

SPEAKER_01

This is absolutely Route 1, and I think I was proved right in the end. So the first thing that I think of that scared me as a kid was I think he's a Sir. I don't know if he's been stripped now. Uh Jimmy Savile.

SPEAKER_00

I imagine he has been.

SPEAKER_01

You'd like to think so, wouldn't you?

SPEAKER_00

But I mean, probably didn't think he'd just forgotten he is still Sir Jimmy. Yeah, I I don't know if I was scared by Jimmy Savile, I just found him odd.

SPEAKER_01

I found him like really repulsive. Like my my man used to say all the time, like you should you should write and uh try and get on. I used to that like no way, no chance. I didn't want anything to do with this this man. I I found him disgusting for all the right reasons.

SPEAKER_00

Like, do you know what you want to do? Do you know who I like? That that that Adolf Hitler character, you should get get with him, and things are gonna things are gonna go look good for you.

SPEAKER_01

I'm back for a bit, but uh Mr. Sutcliffe next door is gonna look like you.

SPEAKER_00

But yeah, I I always remember him being on TV, was a mainstay. I don't I never found it. I I used to think people found him as this like obviously this extent, and this is not just in hindsight. I'd I'd you know, I'll happily tell you that I used to love Rolf Harris. Do you know what I mean? Not now. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is not just hindsight, you know, being woke and having a go at the uh yeah, the ma the the mass pedophile gives him anyway. Um we he was always on TV, and I think people used to say, Oh, look, it's Jimmy Savile. I just found him odd.

SPEAKER_01

I just found him No, I found him quite sort of scary though, and like a sort of like zombie sort of like being dug up, like sort of his hair was sort of fake.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, actually, although quite fake, his hair weren't fake.

SPEAKER_01

No, but it kind of looks like it was fake. But as I'm thinking of him, I'm thinking of Doc out of uh Back to the Future.

SPEAKER_00

Ah, you're getting mixed up big time now. You can't have a go Chris.

SPEAKER_01

That was a wig, wasn't it? No, I like Doc. I'm not scared of Doc, but I was scared of Jimmy Savile.

SPEAKER_00

Everyone thinks I'm Jimmy Savile.

SPEAKER_01

But like you say, yeah, this is gonna go back to 90. What now? What would it be like? 2010. Yeah, we think I'm Jimmy Savile.

SPEAKER_00

Oh boy, yeah, we're brilliant that yeah.

SPEAKER_01

This is heavy, Doc. But yeah, because uh completely as you've said, I did like Rolf at the time. Yeah, the one I kind of didn't like, and he's turned out to be alright, but I would have sort of put in the same category. You're not gonna accuse people of stuff again, are we like? No, no, because obviously I think enough time's gone that he's he's in the clear, like he's obviously he's not done anything, but you'd find Freddie Starr a bit sort of like menacing as well, I think.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, Freddie Star is the guy who fell in the stocks, isn't he?

SPEAKER_01

With Tregas and um no, that's Bobby Davro.

SPEAKER_00

What am I on about? Yeah, he does look a bit like him, doesn't he? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Angry wizard-looking man, like uh wizard-looking man.

SPEAKER_00

It looks a bit like him though, don't I? Bobby Davvero.

SPEAKER_01

Uh I suppose I can see what you mean, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, uh yeah, I wish it was Bobby Davro. Yeah, I never scared of Bobby Davvero. Um, but it's funny because obviously the there were the Steve Coogan. Oh no, it wasn't that actually with a Netflix documentary about uh Jimmy Savall, when there were loads of Americans on Twitter just saying, Oh, obviously we're a paedophile.

SPEAKER_01

Like, how did I know it was a little bit of a little bit of a little paedophile, isn't it?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, but obviously for us it were like we knew there's loads of jokes and in-jokes and things like that that were going on. There's a lot lot of stuff going on about it even back in the day that bit were like a sort of open secret, but it's mad that it looks exactly like it's mad that anyone was shocked.

SPEAKER_01

It's like a joke when it came out, like people say, You are kidding me.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, imagine if you're away.

SPEAKER_01

Jimmy Savile is a paedophile.

SPEAKER_00

You are absolutely kidding me. You are no way, I'm not having that. No, no way, man. It does look like someone off brass eye on the paed again episode. It's absolutely crazy when you think back. Like I say, the Americans who didn't grow up with them, um, they were on Twitter going, uh what? How did you not mind paedophile? What do you mean? Yeah, I don't know if you get pantomime pedophiles.

SPEAKER_01

Imagine that like he's behind you, he's behind you.

Quicksand Panic And Pop Culture

SPEAKER_00

Oh now then because we're careful, you can't say that anymore. Someone got done for that uh recently doing a Jimmy Sovele impression. I can't remember what it was, but it's not done in an affectionate way, it's done very much in a competent way. My next one, Liam, we're going to go from people, and um I didn't realise how common this was until I looked into it. Quicksand. And I think you're what you you're with me here, aren't you, with this one?

SPEAKER_01

I'm right on board with this one. I remember when I was little thinking any sand could be quicksand, and that the second you stepped on it, you kind of just vanished down into it and there was nothing you could do. Like I think you said like it was on all the time, like whatever you watched, it were like quicksand was part of the plot, like, oh no, it's quicksand. Is quicksand even a thing?

SPEAKER_00

Well, listen to this. In 2010, an article by Slate said this gimmick had its heyday in the 1960s, almost 3% of all film characters 3% used to like drowned in quicksand.

SPEAKER_01

Of all film characters.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah, that's what it says. Of all film characters drowned in quicksand.

SPEAKER_01

That's one in thirty, so if there's like 30 people and everything.

SPEAKER_00

Obviously, these are animations I would have thought as well. It says characters, so I presume, you know, it were always. I would imagine like what it means is character deaths were quicksand.

SPEAKER_01

It can't be all characters just vanishing.

SPEAKER_00

Almost three percent of all I'm just gonna double check this.

SPEAKER_01

I reckon character deaths.

SPEAKER_00

96 is almost 3% of all or sorry, of all films showed characters sinking in quicksand.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I can get yeah, yeah, I can get on board with that. Still weird.

SPEAKER_00

One in thirty.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, well I one in thirty-three, innit. But yeah, no, it's still a lot, yeah. It was if you watched um I mean, let's say you watch a film a week, you you're averaging you're seeing at least one of somebody dying of quicksand. Yeah, I yeah, I mean No, no, I'm genuinely as well. Like, I'm not I'm I'm not sort of mocking you there. I I remember thinking, like, oh my god, like if you step on the wrong bit of sand, that's it.

SPEAKER_00

They were always in cartoons. Beano and Dander. Do you know the Beano and Dander? Everyone, I reckon every single character in that comic at one point has been in quicksand. Yeah. I thought you were everywhere. I remember used to stand I used to stand on like Blackpool Beach or wherever it was sort of creeping around because I thought everywhere, I thought you were everywhere, quicksand, like I'm doing it. I'm sure I've watched something.

SPEAKER_01

Sorry, yeah, no, yeah, I completely agree. But I'm sure I watched Mythbusters and it's almost impossible to sort of die in quicksand. I think you can get stuck in it, and you sort of need to be rescued. But I think this thing of getting sucked down into it, I just don't think that's a thing. I think I think people get trapped in sand and then drown sometimes as the tide's coming in.

SPEAKER_00

I watched Bear Grows in preparation for this, actually, and he would talk about how to get out of quicksand, and he said that you just shuffle and wriggle calmly. You don't, yeah, I'm not bothered about how he got out, so hopefully, really I've now I'm older, I know that I'll never be in quicksand. Um, I'm quite confident about that. Probably one of the things in it where like next week you you think, oh god, I wish I had said that.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, but it cuts like a sitcom.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, cuts cuts to it like a really shit sitcom. Oh my god. Um, but yeah, uh what someone in the comments said there's loads of quicksand in Morecambe. Don't know if that's true, but um, if it is, let us know.

SPEAKER_01

No, but again, then the the winkle pickers, they they got killed, didn't they? But it weren't quicksand, the tide came in behind them. So they were like on a on a sandbank and the tide.

SPEAKER_00

Anyway, what Bear Gros was saying is that not most people die because they get stuck in it, and it's it's in a lot of places like the deserts and stuff like that, and they die because they can't get out and the sun burns them, well, like you know, dehydrates them or whatever. So they don't actually drown in the quicksand, they drowned, like they they they just died from the sun. They drowned from the sun. They drowned from the sun. Just before we move on, and this is completely irrelevant to what we're talking about, but there used to be a UB, I had a UB40 album when I was really young, and there's a there's a line in it, I think it's a cover song of a song called Guilty, and it and it's a like a spoken word song, and he goes, uh, Love it's a bit like quicksand, the more you're in it, the deeper you get. I always genuinely, not as a joke, used to think that line was love is a bit like quicksave. The more you're in it, the deeper you get. And I used to sing that. And I what were I even like thinking then? Like, how could that like possibly mean? Love is a little bit like quicksave.

SPEAKER_01

The more you're in it. Like, yeah, I suppose like the deeper you get into your shopping experience, you start seeing all the vouchers and like oh, two two for one. Yeah, I might have that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah, fair enough. Yeah, then maybe that was the lyrics and I've got it wrong. Um, what's your next one, Leroy?

SPEAKER_01

Very similar theme, actually. So I don't know where it was, but we used to get on a bus into town from Fleeless Town End, and somewhere on the route there was some water. And I remember my mum once saying, You've got to be very careful around like sort of rivers and water and stuff like that, because if you fall in, the weeds at the bottom will tangle you up, they'll wrap you up, and you'll just drown. So I used to be absolutely terrified of the thought of falling in water, and then I used to sort of it was almost like that the weeds were personified in my mind that they were trying to drag me down.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I the public information film, do you know the what the the one I'm talking about? The water one where it's like uh it's like death story because beware of the water. Yeah, it's like kids playing in it. Is that is that what happens in that one? Is that is that do they?

SPEAKER_01

I don't think that's necessarily to do with the weeds, I think that's just like cold, deep water that it can sort of take your breath away and it's it you you can drown quite quickly in it. I'm I'm not yeah, I'm not sure. I'm not sure if the weed specific bit was like myfia or if that was touched on in the information videos. I don't know, but yeah, for for a long time like that one. That that's not even one just when I was little. That's one uh even growing up, I used to think, oh god, it I don't want to like go anywhere in that water in case there's any weeds in there that'll sort of drag me down.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I mean it's good advice though, isn't it? Because you could get dragged, but we have to be responsible.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I've been in water lots of times and uh the weeds have never dragged me down.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, but there's always that first time. You never you can't say for definite that it's never gonna happen. Well, no, I just think we've we've gotta we've gotta be we've gotta be um we've got to do our job here as a Yeah, but I don't wanna I I want people to enjoy the water, I don't want to spend the time terrified of it like I was. Yeah, okay, that's fine. Treat it with respect. Treat it with respect, but you know, have a lot of fun. There's no reason why you can't have a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_01

Oh you can have a lot of fun, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Uh the Bermuda Triangle was something that was genuinely scared about because I don't know have you ever heard of a game called Zack McAre and the eight and the alien minders? No. It's for it for the meager, and there's a scene in it where he goes to the Bermuda Triangle. And I asked my mum one day when I was playing, she said, What's the Bermuda Triangle, Mum? She goes, Oh, it's just this place where people disappear. And that were it, walked out of the room. That were enough. And I I that stayed with me so much that I thought, what they just disappear, like they they I thought like people just went to this place and then vanished. I thought that's what it was.

SPEAKER_01

Bermuda Triangle, where people disappear. Bermuda Triangle. Don't go anywhere.

SPEAKER_00

What's that?

SPEAKER_01

That's um Barry Manolo, is it?

SPEAKER_00

Does he sing that?

unknown

I think so.

SPEAKER_01

I think it's Barry Manolo. They referenced it on XFM. I think it's uh I think it's that Bermuda.

SPEAKER_00

But you're scared of this, Lane, or is it uh a nothing?

SPEAKER_01

I remember finding it like really weird. And I I think this is the bit you don't get when you talk to young kids. So I remember asking my granddad about it, and him sort of very matter-of fact saying, Oh yeah, planes just go missing there. Like that that's it, like very kind. And me just thinking like as a little kid, what do you mean? Where did it go?

Cosmic Dread And Heaven Forever

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I've not got it on this because I never used it, but Ouija boards. Remember asking my dad or whatever, what's a Ouija board, Dad? Oh, basically, you play it and then like uh uh an evil spirit. Yeah, yeah, an evil spirit will come or Satan will come. Yeah, all right, saying about bite, what you can't just leave it at that. Yeah, see you can't just leave it at that. What you just do you know what I mean? Mad though, I mean, I understand why, because you haven't got time. As you're probably like it with your kids now, you ain't got time to sit down and say, But what it is is in the in the sick 1960s or whatever the wherever it started, you know, the speech.

SPEAKER_01

I I know, I'd probably kind of go the other way. I'd probably try and over-explain it. They're saying, like, all right, all right. And I'm saying, like, now what it is, like they reckon some gas bubbles come up from the bottom of the ocean, yeah. It means that the ships can't float in it when it becomes the the water's not dense enough. And I think it's a little bit bothered.

SPEAKER_00

It's a little bit overplayed as well, I think, isn't it? I think a lot of uh playing.

SPEAKER_01

There's a couple of things, isn't there? I think that there was something to do with I I don't know if the magnetic poles affecting like I don't know, I don't know if some compasses were affected. I think I think the boat's thing is again Mythbusters heavy on this one, but I'm sure they did something about if you try and swim in some water that has enough air in it, you can you kind of can't float, it's not dense enough, and they reckon some ships might have sunk because of that. Maybe the weeds got them Yeah, dragged down by the weeds.

SPEAKER_00

Drag down one of the weeds. Well, quicksand and weeds quicksand and weeds, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So my next one is uh a general one with a very specific bit on the end. So I I was terrified of dogs when I was a kid. Um I I think like multiple reasons. I think So where where I grew up was certainly like I I lived uh like what do you call it now, like Roby Street, it's Grimesthorpe, isn't it? Like it's it's not a great area. I lived there for a little bit when I was a baby, but I don't remember that. But then when I lived at Charnock, I remember there being a massive big uh German shepherd called Megan, and we all used to be terrified of it. Sometimes it used to kind of get out of its cave. Oh yeah. Yeah, I don't know if it ever bit anyone or it may do you know what it might even have been quite a friendly dog that the rumours were just uh like it was this devil dog. Yeah, yeah. Got messed up with Megan. Yeah. There was also two dogs when uh near the fruit shop there were two dogs that like lived in a cage, and they used to go mad when you walked past them. And I think probably the the main reason as well, so my grandma and granddad had a poodle called Charles, uh, and he was completely blind. So his eyes were like, do you know when they go like that purple like glazed over?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, like um PJ from PJ and Duncan, or is it Duncan?

SPEAKER_01

Um yeah, was it PJ?

SPEAKER_00

And whichever one Ann played anyway, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So yeah, Charles Charles was like uh PJ. It there was no paintball involves, he just went blind with old age, but he I think because they were sort of scared of it.

SPEAKER_00

How did you know we were blind?

SPEAKER_01

Well, because he couldn't see.

SPEAKER_00

Well, really, that's what I mean, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So because they were terrified of like us as young kids sort of accidentally tripping on him or whatever. They used to really keep us away and like whenever he came in the room, Charles. I feel like Charles, come on. Yeah, no, I felt sorry for him, and like if he came too close, because I'd sort of go, uh, ah if you're gonna be able to get more they're more about the sniffing anyway, aren't they? Dogs like look like I didn't want him anywhere near me, so my grandad used to whack him with a new newspaper to get him away.

SPEAKER_00

What's going on here? You've got not nothing to come.

Dogs, Megan The Shepherd And Cartoons

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but I genuinely I feel really bad. I'd love to love to kind of meet Charles again and and say say hello these days. But yeah, I I was just terrified of dogs, and the sort of to a point where I remember when we went to Bridlington and we were playing, I don't know, playing volleyball or rounders or something on the beach, and there was a dog off the lead about 200 metres away, and I could not play the game because all I was doing is watching this dog to see if it came anywhere near me.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, is this all from Meg? Do you think you think it were Meg who um yeah?

SPEAKER_01

I think it's a sort of collective of of things.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and then obviously then your granddad or whatever making you feel like Charles.

SPEAKER_01

Then there were Charles, yeah. Then there were Charles.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, to worry something Charles was someone to worry about. Yeah. Charles was such a good name for a dog. I once caught I once met a dog called Alan.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I love I love dogs with people names, but yeah, I think Charles for a poodle as well is quite fitting as well.

SPEAKER_00

Charles, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

But the yeah, and the other one I was terrified of the dog in Dog Tanyon, and it was Cardinal Richelot, I think it was called. Oh, yeah, yeah, I do know him. Yeah, I don't know if he's like a wolf or a dog, but he dressed in red and he was like the chief bad guy. And uh yeah, I was absolutely terrified of him, and he is technically a dog, so I'm I'm grouping him in.

SPEAKER_00

I think, yeah, I mean, uh I mate Furnace. Do you remember when he is petrified still, where he was last time I saw him at dogs? Do you remember when we had like a bit of a party at my house and I had a dog and it was the friendliest dog ever? But he ran upstairs, didn't he remember? He went ah and he sprinted upstairs and left himself in the bathroom because he was that scared of dogs.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I mean, I I really like dogs now. Still, to be honest, I still I'm still wary of German shepherds, and that is presumably is a is a Megan thing, but yeah, obviously I've got a dog now, I really like dogs, but yeah, at the time uh like to a point I remember my mum saying, like, I once sort of nearly jumped off a pier, like because there's a dog coming the other way, and she had to sort of grab me from like diving over the edge.

SPEAKER_00

That would have been ridiculous, yeah. That's suicide attempts. It's like dogs coming to the lodge. Yeah, well, my dogs just ran into the room as we were talking. I think he's like got the ghost of Charles in him.

SPEAKER_01

Um I dived off the pier, the weeds got me, and then I scrambled three and got stuck in quicksand.

SPEAKER_00

That'd be like a cartoon, wouldn't it? Do you know, like Mickey Mouse? Well, Mickey Mouse probably Tom actually off Tom and Jerry, wouldn't it? B he he'd do that.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, and then he'd sort of finally get out of quicksand and like I don't know, there'd be a bomb on him or something.

The BBC Test Card’s Unsettling Stillness

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah. Ah yeah. Anyway, talking of um in fact there's no segue. Uh I'm talking about um the BBC Test card of the 1980s. Um girl with a chokehold. Yeah, yeah. So it's a it's a girl called Carol Hersey, and she's played Notes and Crosses with a clown doll, um, which is called Bubbles the Clown. It's not even the girl or the clown that scared me. The clown is scary, by the way, what once I've looked at this image back, but at the time I don't think I was that scared by the clown. I would never I had a clown in my bedroom as like a toy, I was never really scared of that. It's the stillness of the image. You're sort of expecting something to happen. And it's and and often there's no music or anything, it's just like a and that used to shit me up a lot. It used to be on uh do you know this is a good fact actually. Um in according to two uh an article in 2006, uh I don't know why you mustn't know this anyway, but um Hersey, anyway, the the girl on the test card is in the Guinness Book of World Records for the longest television appearance in history. She's apparently been on TV for over 70,000 hours combined, uh, which is nearly eight continuous years. Um so this is a someone off we've all probably seen more than anyone else in our lifetime. It did get phased out though, to be honest. Like by 1997, they started showing C Fax instead.

SPEAKER_01

I think younger viewers won't have any clue. I mean, they might have seen it as a sort of retro thing, but yeah, it it's weird it it did used to be on. If you switched to the channel after a certain time, that was on. I remember thinking how creepy it'd be, and they should have done this. It's just once, like she just turned around.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah. I genuinely had a nightmare. I genuinely had a nightmare as a child, and I'm pretty I didn't see the episode, but I think it's in Life on Mars where something similar happens, where I'm watching the TV and they do move, they are moving on TV, and like it were a really they didn't weren't doing anything like sinister, but it Really scared me like the clowns moving about and stuff. And I'm like, oh my, oh what? This is no, no, no, no, no. It's genuinely used to like I say, it wasn't the clown, it wasn't her, it's the stillness of the image. Watching TV and having something just still it just freaked me out big time.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, fair play.

SPEAKER_00

She still owns she's uh Carol here, hearsay, hersay, whatever. She's still she's still with us and she still owns the uh the I thought you said she still sat there. She didn't move. No, she's still uh um she's still got the the the the clown doll so um he's still with us right so there is a happy ending to that one. There is an happy ending, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, so my last one this is a bit older as a kid, this, so this is not like uh a youngster. This is I don't what might you say like how old? Like m I don't know, maybe twelve, eleven. And this was when I I kind of started realizing how big the universe is. And I used to lay in bed like I I can't really explain it, like it's sort of a moment of realising how small you are, like it kind of just used to feel like the world was too big almost. Does that does that make any sense?

SPEAKER_00

Like right, it's very similar. I used to be scared of heaven, um, which is mad, but as a concept, as yeah, what it is. I I remember saying to someone, I can't remember, I don't know what how it came up, obviously really young, and I said, What's heaven? And she goes, It's this place where everyone goes when they die, or whatever. And I said, Oh, what happens? But you said, Well, you live forever and ever, and you get to see everyone again, and that petrified me, living forever and ever. Nothing forever. No, well, yeah, alright, fucking lemme. Um, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Do you know what I mean though? Like I I agree, like so I'm thinking more in terms of it.

SPEAKER_00

Well, what forever? You live forever. I even mean a young kid, I was like, that no, you can't live forever. What? Yeah, who would you like to do that? I think there's similar things though.

Queen’s “I’m Going Slightly Mad” Video

SPEAKER_01

Like I'm talking more scale of just like how big everything actually is, but also I I would apply that to time as well. Yeah, I agree. If somebody says like you live forever, that I would find that quite intimidating. Like in whatever that is, yeah. I I can't like the Cole Pilkington thing. Obviously, we might do an episode on that, but it says um, what would you say if you got to heaven? He says something like I'd I'd ask you about the is it true that all your family and friends and everything are there? Um, because if if it is, I'd probably rather not see them again. So done that now.

SPEAKER_00

I always think like if you go to weaven, it'd be awful, you know, the gates, because like you it's small talk, innit? You know, like you could you'd be queuing up with other people who just died at the same time.

SPEAKER_01

I wonder how long it'd be before somebody says, like, at least weather's alright.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, what's it gonna be like tomorrow? Well, it's always good of here to be honest. Yeah, it's whatever weather you want, there, to be honest. Uh yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it might show us some t-shirt tomorrow.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, show us some t-shirt whatever tomorrow.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, it is supposed to be like obviously my thing was kind of more just I kind of could envisage just just moving away from myself and just carrying on forever. Like you can't sort of comprehend that infinity. I I suppose actually maybe it is the concept of infinity, like it's it's kind of just you can't yeah, it goes on forever.

SPEAKER_00

Like with the universe goes on forever. No, it no, no, no, that don't work. Well, no, no, it doesn't you know what I mean? It should blow you can't but what's after that? Well, nothing, it just goes on forever. It just goes on forever, yeah. But you can't, there has to be an end because obviously that's how we uh it is are you it's mine, but I'd forget it as a kid. You you you you're messing with my mind now, to be honest. I'll I'll be up all night thinking about this. It is, it's ridiculous, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01

It is absolutely but I suppose it's the heaven thing, like that the concept is supposed to be that it is good, like it's not like you think, oh you know, not this.

SPEAKER_00

I think so, yeah. The concept of heaven is usually quite.

SPEAKER_01

But then you're bored after a week, but have you gone all inclusive? I mean I went all inclusive for ten days, and I said, I could have come home after seven, to be honest. Yeah, bad enough. Surrounded heaven, like what do you think of it?

SPEAKER_00

I could have gone after seven days, to be honest. I've had enough, to be honest. It's just it's just yeah, I've done I've done everything, done everything that I needed to do. I mean that a big train sketch. I'm sure that's a big train sketch where she goes to heaven, um, and she goes, uh she goes, Yeah, it was really nice, everyone really friendly, and it was just really, really boring. I don't imagine that's what like yeah. I I I I think there's a talking head song as well called Heaven, and he goes, Heaven is a place where nothing happens, nothing happens at all. You're like, Yeah, I can sort of sing that as well.

SPEAKER_01

That's uh the Delamitri song that I did on karaoke that will probably never be heard.

SPEAKER_00

Um it will be heard because you need to get your finger out. That's my biggest fear. That that never sees a light day. What if you pass away and you've got all the yeah. Um I'm gonna talk about now. I've got a couple left.

SPEAKER_01

Um yeah, so are they all the main ones covered? Are we moving on to any other business? Any other things?

Pinocchio’s Dark 1972 Adaptation

SPEAKER_00

I've I've I've had well I've I'm gonna finish on my I'll tell you what, I'll go through it now because then we've got as big as big as ones. I've got two big ones left that are both wanted to mention. This scared me second only to the world in action video, and it's the song the video for the song I'm Going Slightly Mad by Queen. You know what I mean? It's quite a creepy song in itself, I think. I have my temperature rising, I'm going slightly mad. So Queen was the first band that I ever liked as a kid. I had Bohemian Raps of John Wainsworld, loved it. Um and it was the first album anyone bought. My dad got me Queen's Greatest It's One from uh a car boot sale. My first I think everyone had Queen's Greatest It's Yeah, first first album I got, yeah. Yeah, and Queen Live at Wembley. Um, I think everyone seemed to have on VHS as well at our age. But I really got into my books and all sorts, and then you know, got the couple more albums and stuff like that. And then I got Queen's Greatest It's Two on video. I got I'd already got Queen's Greatest Hits One on video, and on the back it shows you all the members, and I genuinely didn't realise that one of the members were Freddy because I'd only ever known him with that tash, really. Do you know, like the you know, you you know the the the yellow thing that is then yeah uh string versus yellow jacket yeah, yeah. And this was a colour picture from the days of our life video where he's literally dying. Everyone I think has seen that video. Yeah, um, this last one he died. So he's got no tash, and that creeped me out a little bit when I opened the I got it for Christmas. I always remember I'm like, who's that? That's like who's that? Like my dad's like, oh, it's Freddie Mercury. What? Creeped me out a little bit. So then I went through the video and it's fine. He's there with his tash doing kind of magic, Radio Gaga, Who Wants to Live Forever, all the bigots. And then I'm going slightly mad comes on, it's in black and white. I don't know if you're the same as this. I've I always used to find black and white films quite eerie anyway, as a kid.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, but then Freddie pops up and he looks like something from a fucking horror film. He's wearing a big wig. Edward scissor hand looking, isn't he? Yeah, and it it does it he's wearing a big wig, he's wearing white makeup, he's got a really thin face, and it's brought out even more this thin face, because obviously he's really ill at this point, and he's doing these exaggerated expressions, so you can see almost like the bones on his face, if you know what I mean, as he's doing these and he's wearing these white gloves. I honestly shit my pants. Like I said, I think the song itself's pretty odd, and then this I and I I think the fact that I knew he died, because this this must have been the year after he died, I got this video. That that made me I'm like, oh my, he's a ghost. I don't I can't get my head around it. I he just absolutely petrified me as a video. You you know what video I'm talking about, don't you?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, it is it is creepy. He sort of moves a bit almost manic in here as well. Like he's he's sort of his moves aren't quite natural, in it. Yeah, it's weird.

SPEAKER_00

I think he's trying to be funny, in it, and it is like sort of funny. You know, I can look at it now as a in my 40s and you know I'm able to watch it on my own. But uh I think because he's ill as well, and I well, you know, but because he's ill as well, and I knew he'd already died, and he pops up like that. I'd never seen him look like that before. I'd never seen him without a tash, basically, or a bit like long hair, maybe in the Boy and Rapsid video. Absolutely, and uh there's another version of this song called the Totally Bonkers version, um, which Queen used as a message for the 1991 fan club convention, and it's that as a song is so ghostly. It's uh it's like going, I'm going totally bonkers, then he goes, Goodbye. And it's all this weird, like oh, it's all oh I've got shivers. I've got shivers now. Yeah, so yeah, I kind of see where you're coming from.

SPEAKER_01

I I I can't say I've experienced that. It is slightly weird.

Rapid-Fire Fears: Stores, Sayings, Escalators

SPEAKER_00

Um I'm going slightly weird. I just found it really, really, really I think it's it was the shock of the double whammy of looking at the back and seeing this Freddie man who was supposed to be Freddie Mercury. I'd never seen him look like that, which were like, what? And then going through the video and it was just him being normal, you know, his time and then that the coming up going boom, boom. And it's like a creepy song, yeah. Shit me up, shit me up big time. Um I'll go for one more then, William. I've I'll I'll go for a Brucie bonus and we'll go to the first one. Oh, I'll go on then, yeah. Well, I'm I'm gonna say I've got one more, then I've got a couple of Brucey bonuses. Um, so this was one that's a minor Brucey bonuses. So if you've got one more kind of real one, go for it. Well, I think we can both agree on this. I'll do this as a joint one. This is the Adventures of Pinocchio, the 1972 Italian anime. Well, this is creepy now.

SPEAKER_01

I don't remember this as a kid, but you've sent me this much more recently.

SPEAKER_00

I thought I'm sure we've spoken about this though, and you do sort of remember it like that.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but I couldn't. It sort of triggers some sort of like, uh yeah, but I I'm not sure I I can't tell you when I saw it. I can't remember being scared of it as a kid, but it does sort of touch a nerve somewhere.

SPEAKER_00

So I'd seen the Disney version of Pinocchio, one of the few films I had seen. Um but I remember once I were at my nan's house and she put the TV on, and from my nan's point of view, it was just a cartoon that we're on, you know. She goes, Oh, I'll put this on for you, Andrew. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was just this really creepy wooden, and I I sort of realised straight away, is that supposed to be Pinocchio? But because I I was so I knew the other Pinocchio so vividly, you know, I'd seen it, you know, that many times or whatever. This guy walking around like just like really weird walking and stuff, walking like a wooden puppet should walk, I suppose, compared to the you know the Disney one. So it's weird anyway. But then there's this scene in it where he's he's screaming about dying of hunger because he upsets what's his name, Geppet Geppetto. Geppetto, yeah. And he's going, Oh my god, I'm it should Geppetto fucks off and leaves him basically. So he goes, Oh, I'm going to die of hunger. And it's really like he's like, What? And then I obviously sent you this earlier. And I know this is in the book, but this is supposed this is like for a kid's film. He gets hung. He gets literally hung from a tree, swinging from side to side, and the and the voiceover says something like Pinocchio knows he's nearing the end of his life.

SPEAKER_01

You know, yeah, he's not swinging in the breeze with a noose round his neck.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, he does get saved in the end, but yeah, he's got a noose. You can't have a hanging in a kid's TV show. I certainly Mo Money Meeking earlier actually, and he just put, What the fuck is this? I'll share this on the socials because this is yeah, this is just I I think this is mad for a kid's TV show. Or film, should I say, fantasy film.

SPEAKER_01

I think uh Mo Money Meeking has crafted his image of not swearing publicly, and you've just made him look like a a filthy mouthed review. Oh yeah, possible, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Well, well that's how scary it was. He's had to break, he's had to break his moral code. I think that's the first time he's he's ever sworn, isn't it? I don't think that's true at all, to be honest. But uh I saw him after Wembley. Um but yeah, I think but yeah, it's really, really, really, really creepy. And I just like I just like what you can't do this.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it is it is really weird. And and again, that's one I think if even if you watch that now, you would think, God, this is this is really weird.

SPEAKER_00

I mean, it even the anim the animation's quite a bit jerky and a bit weird, like it's it's not and his voice is really whiny, it's dubbed because it's an Italian film where it's dubbed, and he's like, Oh no, I don't, but it's like a really it's not a nice version of Pinocchio, but and that makes it weirder in a weird way.

Doctor Who, Showers And Medium Wave Nights

SPEAKER_01

Right, so we'll go on to the sort of quick quick fire round, I suppose. I mean the first one, really quick fire, because I've mentioned this before. Uh Colbrothers, the the John Lewis store in Sheffield. Um I I have a feeling something happened to me in there, but I I don't know what it is. So I was always a bit scared of Cole Brothers. Um and I'll I'll go one more and then you can you can have a go at one. So this is one of those sort of really throwaway comments that like to a young kid is terrifying. And it and I never really got it even as I got older. But I remember as a kid thinking, what like that is what's going on. So so loads of people listening, don't know if it's a northern thing, don't know if it's a Sheffield thing, people might agree or might never have heard this before. But if I used to sort of pull a face, like if my mum said you can't do that and I pull a face, my mum or my grandma or my granddad would always say, Oh, if the wind changes, your face will stay like that. Yeah, yeah. And I used to say, What? Like, what does that even mean? Like, if if the wind changes, if it if it gets windy, my face will be stuck. And what did he mean? Like, well, is it the expression? Am I literally just frozen? And I remember like just thinking, what? Like, and then it like I'd sort of say, What do you mean? And they say, Well, it's just a phrase, but then I'd sort of think, Well, you know, it's almost like no smoke without fire, innit? Like, well, but where does that phrase come from? What do you what do you mean?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah, what do you mean? Yeah, uh it reminds me of the what one of the ones I've got as a thingy, actually, where my nan used to say, Don't swallow your orange pips because a tree will grow inside of you. And I used to think that I thought, What? What how did it just come out of my mouth? Like, do you know what I mean? Can you do? Because as a kid, you do like your logic, you're like going, but but how could that possibly happen? I don't I've never seen anyone with a tree coming out of their mouth, I've never seen anyone with a face just stuck in one place. I remember again going back to the Beano and Dandy, which we should do an episode on, I don't know which one it was. There's a scene in that where someone's face changes because the wind blows, um, or whatever it is. And yeah, and that you that scared me a lot. That that sort of that idea that you're facing. I wonder where the original phrase comes from. What does it mean? It's I think it's just a way of telling kids to stop being sulky, isn't it? Like so you said if you carry on sulking, you'll stay like that or whatever. It's just like a a a mild threat. A lot of these fears are mild threats, aren't they? Like the one with chewing them. If you if you swallow chewing them, it'll get stuck inside your insides.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I would never I remember my mum telling telling us that when I was about six or seven. We went to see uh one of her mates down there. Like baiting. I don't know if Crystal Peaks was a thing then or it would have been built. But I remember thinking, no, I I don't believe that. I just remember swallowing it, thinking, nah, I'm not having it.

SPEAKER_00

Nah, I'm not having that one. Escalators chewing you up. That's another one that I don't know if that it might maybe be just my mum, but if because I used to like jump and stuff on steps or escalators and get snagged, yeah, yeah, yeah. She says it'll suck you under. Think I won't I mean I have seen actually people die on escalators in these like creepiest videos or whatever, but realistically, it's not gonna suck you under, is it?

SPEAKER_01

I've seen somebody like fall over the edge. I've not seen anybody sort of just get stripped to the bone by kind of going under that.

SPEAKER_00

Imagine really slight quicksand thing again, isn't it? Going in really slow. Um a couple of words that I had were the Doctor Who theme tune, opening credits, used to shit myself, used to put my fingers in my ears when it came on.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but I think it it were brilliant. And I know what you mean. It's amazing, it's amazing. It's fantastically well done. I mean, the the Cybermen used to scare me when I was little, but obviously, yeah, deliberately sell. That's that's what I think man used to scare me.

SPEAKER_00

I think I ran in one episode, and it was just basically made out of Bassett's all sorts of sweets, and that used to really scare me, but the candy man. But yeah, just it come on, but I think it's it's a m it's an amazing piece of music, that um Dr. Theme Tune, radiophonic workshop, and it's that it's like an eerie sort of bum boom bum b- bum bum bum. Well do you know what I mean? It's like an order, it's exactly what it should be.

SPEAKER_01

Brilliant man, yeah, yeah. Um, no, no, carry on, go on. Yeah, probably my last one, and this still terrifies me to this day. Um slipping over in the shower. I think someone once told me when I was a kid that someone they knew slipped and hit either the back of the neck or the back on a corner in a shower or the bath, and they were paralysed from that day forward.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, my auntie slipped in a bath when she was really young. My mum told me the story of she slipped on soap and smashed her teeth. Like it she's fine now, but like she smashed like a jaw. So I remember.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I mean that that's terrifying. But and again, Jody's auntie was a carer, and this is more recently. I I sort of remember saying to her, like, Oh yeah, really wary getting in the shower. Like, always terrified of slipping. And she said, Oh, I wanted pipes she cared for, she was just sort of normal active person. I think she's in her 30s, she slipped in the shower, paralysed from the from the neck down. So don't have a shower, that's the key. Well, dude, just take care, be careful when you're getting in and out. Like the kids as well, sometimes have all these sort of stupid things in there, like you know, like gels and stuff.

SPEAKER_02

And yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

You've got to be very, very careful. So uh, yeah, go safe out there, people.

SPEAKER_00

Go safe out there. Um, yeah, well the last one I've got, and I don't really know how to explain this one. So I used to sleep with my hands as a kid, and in the spare room she'd she'd have it tuned to Radio Sheffield. Um and I'd sleep in that room, and for some reason she used to leave the uh radio on really low. But Radio Sheffield, halfway through the night, I don't know if it still does, I don't think it does anymore. If you had it on medium wave, which she did for some reason, it'd change to foreign radio. So it'd change to like it'd be for the Asian or Asian communities and stuff. And I'd used to wake up in the middle of the night and it'd be foreign people like speaking in a foreign language. I don't I genuinely don't know what it is. I don't I you know I don't know what you know who it was aimed at and stuff. But obviously as a young kid, you I I think people talking it it was just gobbledygook to me because obviously I'd had no idea what a foreign language was or anything like that. It was just people talking really fast in this really and it used to scare me shitless when I woke up and I'd just hear like someone talking in whatever language it'd be.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, and I kind of I I can relate to something similar. So my my grandma and granddad lived so their house backed onto Fields, and it's the only place that I think I've ever slept that was completely pitch black. But they used to have like a little radio in the room, and I'd sort of tune it in at night to try and sleep and just flick between different bits of stuff just trying to sleep. But yeah, you every now and again you'd sort of come across some weird sounding sort of I yeah, I don't even know kind of what nationality they were and like, but but yeah, I used to find it quite like what is it? I mean we we sound like sort of proper little Englanders, don't we? Like the motherfucker.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, but it's fine when you're when you're a kid, you fight it's fine. But no, no, genuinely, because obviously I wasn't any in any way when I were nine, eight, eight, nine years old, exposed to any sort of foreign language or anything like that. So when it just seemed to me, I'm like, why are these people talking like this? I don't understand. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I just coming up this evening, eh? What's he saying? What's he saying on a bossy on about here? What's he on about? Yeah, but yeah, like I say, it was nothing sort of I wasn't like but I was scared because I just it just it were a medium wave's got that weird shh I don't know in the background all the time as well.

Listener Fears, Wrap-Up And Contact

SPEAKER_01

It's sort of like uh hard find a station and then like it it was as if it's like some sort of thing you shouldn't be listening to, like there'd be like some yeah, I don't know, like some sort of Russian background chatting.

SPEAKER_00

I did a playlist actually called Weird Medium Wave Radio, and it's just a load of odd songs that are sort of sort of mixed together.

SPEAKER_01

You like all that sort of trying to be cool stuff, don't you?

SPEAKER_00

It's not it's not cool. I just I tried to sort of make it I've almost got a story for the playlist where some guy goes to work somewhere quite remote, and that's the only station he can find, and it's all these weird sounds, and do you know what I mean? Stuff like that. I'll put it on when we do his website, I'll put it on there.

SPEAKER_01

Uh yeah, I'll put it on your pretentious record label.

SPEAKER_00

That is not pretentious. It starts I don't know what it starts with, actually. Uh I think Beatles are in there. But yeah, it's all this wow sort of stuff. Yeah, so but that'll scare you. That that'll scare you if you listen to that in the dark, let me tell you. Uh thank you for that, Liam. I think we've done all our fears.

SPEAKER_01

Uh yeah, I hope you're not listening to this late at night and we've uh freaked you out. I find that really odd by the way. Do you know, like some people tell us that they go to sleep and they wake up and it's us talking absolute nonsense. We should do like a we should try and set that up once to like prank people where we sort of announce, you know, a bit like War of the Worlds, where we're sort of announcing that we're under attack. To be fair, it might happen anyway. That that might just be. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Imagine if you found out from us though. That'd be mad that way. Like they're dropping the bomb, aren't they? Oh god, I bloody knew they would. Uh yeah, but thanks for all the comments you've been given as well. I know we haven't done a list's episode, we've got lots of comments of the last episode, so let us know your fears, because they are genuinely proper interesting. I'm always I like reading other people's irrational because they've all been irrational, aren't they, ours, to be fair, but from Jimmy Savile. Um I mean the what was his name?

SPEAKER_01

Um Richelot? Cardinal Richelot. I think he I think it it's okay to be scared of him.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, it's okay, but again, it's irrational because he's a he's a drawing. But yeah, I think Jimmy Savile out of all those is the only one that is.

SPEAKER_01

Just last thing that used to absolutely blow my mind. Monkey puzzle trees.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_01

If you get did someone I think I don't know if it's still there. Do you know if as you go down to Sainsbury's? There used to be a they call it a monkey puzzle tree. Oh that to that's what my mum told me it was called. And because it a monkey can't climb.

SPEAKER_00

Oh yeah, I'm lucky now, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't know they were called that, but yeah, I'm didn't scare me.

SPEAKER_01

I just used to th I've just for some reason I just thought of a monkey puzzle tree, so I thought I'd mention it. Why not?

SPEAKER_00

Thought I mentioned it, yeah. Well, thank you, Liam. Uh we'll join you on the uh on the other side. We're probably something a little bit less creepy. But we should do um I think another good episode would be um Ghost Stories as Kids that we were told. I think that'll be quite good.

SPEAKER_01

Um we've had comments on the playground thing as well, so we might do something else with that because some of the suggestions are similar to what we thought, which is more almost like indoor play, I suppose. But yeah. Yeah, we we might we might go back, we're it's our show, we can do what we want.

SPEAKER_00

Do what we want, we'll fucking do what we want, we'll do it, we'll fucking do it again. Uh right, I'll see you next time, Liam. Oh yeah. Thank you for listening to Who Remembers. If you want to get in touch with us, you can find us at Whoremembers Pod at Outlook.com. If you are a right wing fascist, you can find us on Twitter at Who Remembers Pod. Or if you're a wokener, you can find us on Blue Sky at Who Remembers Pod. Once again, thank you for listening, and we will see you next time for more remembering.