Healing What Denial Has Covered

Denial may hide the wound, but it can never heal it.

In this episode, we explore what it means to begin healing the places that denial has covered for far too long. Whether the damage is in our relationship with God, with others, or within ourselves, healing begins when we have the courage to acknowledge the truth.

We'll talk about repairing broken relationships and why genuine healing requires us to take responsibility for the ways we've hurt others instead of focusing only on how we've been hurt. Jesus calls us to examine the "plank" in our own eye before pointing out the faults of someone else. As we recognize the mercy God has extended to us, we learn to extend that same forgiveness to others.

We'll also discuss the important difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. While reconciliation isn't always possible—or even wise—for every relationship, forgiveness is always part of God's invitation to freedom. Forgiveness releases the burden of bitterness and creates space for God to heal what has been broken.

Healing isn't about pretending the pain never happened. It's about allowing God to uncover what denial has hidden, restore what has been damaged, and transform our hearts through His love and grace.

If you're carrying unresolved hurt, struggling to forgive, or longing for restored relationships, this episode will encourage you to step into the light, trust God's healing process, and discover that true healing begins when we stop hiding our wounds and place them in the hands of the Great Healer.

Because what denial covers, God's love is able to heal.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Yay! Welcome to Abundling Love Podcast with your host, Gwendolyn Malika Miller. Hey, and welcome to Abundling Love Podcast. My name is Gwendolyn Malika Miller. I am a licensed professional counselor in the state of Tennessee. I'm also a pastoral counselor. And in addition to that, I'm a singer-songwriter. The singing and the song before the podcast, that's me singing it. Um, I have an album out. I am also an author and I'm a speaker. So God has given me many talents to use to help bring healing to this world. And I'm so grateful to be gifted in this way. Because anytime we have a gift, it's not for us to sit with the gift and hold it to ourselves, but it's to spread it out. So I'm encouraged to be able to spread this gift of love, spread this gift of God's word to you guys and this gift of healing to you. I pray that over the time that you've been listening to the podcast, and if this is your first time listening to the podcast, I pray that it brings healing to your life. I pray that it brings love, this feeling of how much you are loved by God, this understanding of how much you are loved by God. And I also pray that it helps you to overcome the areas in your life that you have been held captive by, and you don't realize that you've been held captive. And I think that's the thing with denial, as we've been talking about during this episode, denial blinds us from things that are holding us captive, that we have become slaves to, and we don't realize how we are slaves to it until God shakes you or until situations come in in your life and shakes you up, or God sends someone in your life to shake you up so you can really see where you are right now in your life. And then from there, you can walk towards your healing. Because here's the thing I love in the scripture when it talks about, first of all, in Romans 12, it talks about be renewed by the transformer of your mind, right? Then you can test and approve what God's will, his good and perfect will. And when I'm talking to my clients, that because of my pastoral counselor too, well, my clients I can share that scripture to correlate it with CBT to help you understand first, in order to change your behavior, we have to change what? Our thoughts. But we can't change something that we're not aware of. And this episode or this season on denial is so important because it leads you to confront those areas in your life and your thought patterns that you have not really been conscious of or run away from it or avoided, or whatever it may have may be for you, in hopes that you can be transformed. We cannot be transformed without being changed in our thought process first. Let me say that again. We cannot be transformed without being changed with our thought process first. Because in order for us to be renewed, it begins where in our minds. But in order to change it, we have to be conscious of where your thoughts are. A lot in therapy, we talk about bringing from the unconscious to the conscious. Like a lot of times, we can have these core beliefs about ourselves or about other people, and core beliefs, and under the surface core belief system are those beliefs or those thoughts that we have been following that are not conscious, not part of our forefront of our minds, but this is what our pattern of life has been directed by. And in order to change it, it takes us asking different key questions to uproot and takes a lot of navigating around certain thought patterns that you may have in order for you to see where what you have been believing and bringing it up to the surface so you can confront it. So, one of the things with humble core beliefs is about um, it talks about how I'm not good enough or different ways that we can speak to ourselves that we normalize because we've been thinking of thinking in this way all these years. But with in order to change, in order to be new in your thoughts, we have to confront those patterns. We have to be aware of those patterns, those habitual thought patterns that we've created and normalized and change them. Denial blocks us from seeing. Hold up, this is hurting me. Hold up, this is a harmful thought pattern. This is negative. Oh, I see how thinking this way impacted how I viewed this person or how I even viewed myself. Oh, I got it. Oh, I see it. Now let me have the humility, the vulnerability to confront it. And we talked about vulnerability before on the other episodes and honesty. So, with vulnerability and honesty, these are the things that you use or are the character changes that you can use to help you overcome denial. We have to be vulnerable, we have to see, okay, yeah, and and talk about this is what's in my life, this is what's in my thoughts, this is what my heart, and then be honest about it. We can't close our eyes anymore to things that God is allowing to bring up the surface so that we can change it, change it, change it, so that we can change it and be able to be different, be transformed into who He's creating us to become more like. If you are a disciple and y'all, if you I've been a disciple, I was gonna say if you listen to a podcast, but I've been a disciple of Jesus for 28 years. And as a disciple, you're confronting those things that we thought were normal in our lives, and we changed it, become more like who? Jesus. So as we're talking, if you are a disciple of Jesus and you listen to it to this podcast, that's the whole goal in that case. If you're not a disciple of Jesus, if you're not someone who follows the Bible, the same is for you. It's still to be changed so you can become less like you used to be and more like God has created you to become more of yourself, and more of yourself eventually leads to you more of yourself, if it's according to God, is basically imitating Jesus and his characteristics, not become more of your negatives of the things that we learn from this world, but be transforming into Jesus' image to really learn love. Like I said earlier, y'all, and I don't know which episode this was up on, but I talked about how God created everything through love and everything was created in love. Us becoming more of ourselves is us becoming more of love because we were created to love, we're created for love. But in order for us to get there, we have to examine the things that's in our lives and our minds and our thoughts that's blocking us from loving other people, that's blocking us from loving God and catches that's blocking us from loving ourselves. And today I want to talk about healing because that's how we get towards healing is addressing those things that's been blocking us and learning how to love. So healing, what denial has covered, healing what denial has covered. I know I said a lot already, but that's what we're gonna be talking about today. And the first thing we're gonna be addressing is emotional and relational healing after denial. Like, what does that look like to heal after denial? And one of those things is basically having honest conversations within those relationships, but honesty with the point of building others up and building and building others up and repairing those relationships and speaking out of love. In Ephesians, it says, I'm gonna go there real quick. This is not a part of the the scriptures I wanted to go through, but we're gonna go through this one right now, though. In Ephesians, I'm going to my my phone today. So Ephesians chapter um five and in verse um, it may be, I'm sorry, y'all know it's Ephesians chapter 4. Ephesians 4. And in verse 15 it says, instead, speaking the truth, how in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head that is Christ. From him, the whole body joined and held together by every supporting ligament, growing and building itself up how in love, as each part does its work. So speaking the truth in love to one another helps build each other up. That's why we we I talk about having accountability partners or people that we feel safe with, and also when in relationships with, let's say, for example, friendships. If someone, if you've been having a relationship with someone and that person has told you that you've hurt them, and you don't really see how you've hurt them, but they're telling you again, over and over again, that that whatever behavior you're doing is hurting them. It's not for you to become defensive in that space, because when you become defensive, that's you ignoring the aspect that your behavior is hurting someone. With mindfulness, we talk about acceptance and being aware. With acceptance, it's seeing, okay, I see that with awareness basically, brother, is I see that this is hurting you. I'm observing how these what your emotions are, and I may not be aware of my behavior in that moment, and but I'm praying for God to help me be aware of how my behavior is hurting you, and at the same time, I can accept the fact that whatever I'm doing is hurting you, and therefore, because of that, I can apologize for that. I need to grow more in understanding, okay, God help me to see that whatever I said, whatever I've done, that's hurting you. And by doing that, by you showing humility in that way, it helps to repair the relationship, even if you don't understand. Sometimes we in conversations with people, we focus so much with trying to be understood versus trying to understand what's happening in those other per other people. The only way to heal in relationships is having that posture of let me actively listen to you. Let me listen to you in a way that I am seeing you, I'm hearing you, and removing pride, that pride that we talked about before, that that defensive posture that comes up when we feel as if we're being attacked, or if we feel the ego come up inside of us, and we are defensive, and because we're trying to protect our image or protect whatever perceived way you perceive yourself and thinking, hold up, I would not do anything like that, or I wouldn't say anything like that. No, let's humble ourselves to really see, okay, I have hurt her, or I have hurt him. Let me change whatever I'm let me listen so that I can change. And y'all, what I'm sharing with you is something I've had to do over my life, over my years as a disciple, because before I was a disciple, I was in denial about my own behavior, about how I spoke to people. I just was a straight shooter, off the cuff, with no tact, didn't care how it made you feel. You take it how you leave it, you take it, whatever, you know, I leave it where it's at, and I go on about my business. I may have hurt you. That's you. I don't care. Like that's you being hurt, and it had nothing to do with me. I just had to say what I needed to say and get off my chest. That wasn't loving. And I've had to understand over my years how much that wasn't loving. And it wasn't, and I wasn't really seeing the person. I was just being selfish and seeing me. I wasn't seeing how my conversation with them was hurting them. Yeah, I remember um a couple of years ago I was seeing with someone, and I think I shared about this, but I'm gonna share it again. I had a roommate in my apartment that I had in New York, and she was someone I had been friends with for many years. And uh, when she moved in, I was already burnt out. I was already going through um depression, I think, too at that time, and but didn't know it. But I was I knew I was burnt out because I was overwhelmed. I was teaching school, I was leading a Bible talk, I was discipling women, I was helping with the singles ministry, all of that stuff. And I had two other ones before she moved in that were a lot, you know, it was a lot to deal with emotionally. And so when she moved in, I was burnt out, I was just done. And so she was telling me how, because how I was hurting, but in my mind, I couldn't see it because I'm like, I was getting annoyed with her stuff being in the library or being in the kitchen or in a dining room area. And I'm like, when are you gonna unpack? When you're gonna unpack? When you're gonna unpack? And it was annoying me, and it was irritating her for me to ask her, and then I wasn't even seeing how my behavior towards her was irritating her. I didn't see any ways that I was hurting her, but I was, but because I was so selfish and so into my in my own emotions, I couldn't see her. So we had to sit down with someone to mediate for us. And in the mediation, the older sister, um, she said basically how um I was doing too much. I was basically doing too much. I was pouring out my oil, you know, the virgins who had five oil, the other one who didn't have a lot, and and I was being the one who didn't have a lot, pouring out oil that I didn't have, and I needed to replenish myself. And she was like basically taking our time for that, and also taking our time for just me and this other sister to really get to know each other. And I have to admit that I left uh when I moved out, I think we were a little bit better, but when I moved out, I was just I was just done with living in that space because it was not a good place, an apartment to live in. But I I repented some, but I still wasn't clear on my attitude and how I treated her. It's taken years for me to look back at that situation to see how I was not right. I was not right in how I spoke to her, I wasn't not right in how my attitude was towards her. And I and I'm I'm gonna call her apologize to her, but she's gonna be like, why are you calling me out in this only seat all this time? But it's taken me time to get to learn myself a little bit more, to see my character, to see how I treated people, and at the same time to apologize for it and hopes that it would bring healing, wherever there may be healing for her, and maybe healing for me within that relationship. And remember, we don't have to be friends or be connected anymore or whatever, where God may lead it to, but the point is basically repairing that heart, repairing her heart, repairing my heart within that and bringing healing to that space. Now, let me tell you this: we're repairing relationships with other people. Sometimes we think we have to be reconciled or be in friendship with them, but it doesn't mean that we have to. Sometimes it just means apologizing to them. And if they choose to reconcile with you, be a friend to you, then they do. If they don't, then they don't. But and all of it is you having peace within that relationship, peace within that space, you know, and from there, it's like learning how to do that with other people that you may have hurt in your life. You know, with denial, denial it blinds you from seeing truly how you've hurt people. Let me tell y'all, right now I'm feeling really uh sad as I'm talking to you about this because I'm I'm in a situation right now, honestly, where someone reached out to me and they were like, someone told them that the way that they cut me off was wrong. And so they wanted to reach out to me and say, um, if we want if you want to be friends again or you want to connect again, um it's on you to do that. Let's do that. But the way that they said it was not taking responsibility for their actions, it was more of I'm doing this because someone told me that I was wrong and doing it. That's not recognizing yourself, that's you still walking in denial and not really and walking in, I'm just gonna say pride because pride is a component of denial too. Because with pride, you can't really see yourself, you can't really see your behavior and how you're hurting someone else. It's walking in that pride that blinds you from really seeing how much it hurts someone. And I sent them a text back and I said basically, if you really want reconciliation or want to be in my life, then you have to pick up the phone and call me, not to do this in a text. Y'all, let me, I don't know what's up with this generation now, thinking that you can have these hard conversations through a text. No, pick up the phone, call me, or set up time to have lunch or something so you can do face-to-face. You can't really truly reconcile a relationship or repair relationship over text. And I tell my clients, like, don't do that, don't have a long argument with somebody over text because you can always misconstrue texts. See them eye to eye so that you can really see the person before you, and so they can see you and see if you really are humbled out, you know, or see if they are really humbled out, and you can repair that relationship in that way, you know. In Matthew 7, let's go there in Matthew chapter 7, and in verse 3 to 5, it says, Why do you look at the speck? Now, before then, in verse 1 to 2, let me go on and start there in verse 1 to 2. I'm reading the NIV version, do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly the to remove the speck from your brother's eye. Let me stop there. When you're reconciling a repairing relationship, you first have to sit with yourself to see what is in me that's leading me to do these things to hurt a person that I'm in friendship with or a relationship with. You have to remove that plank or that speck from your eye so that you can see yourself clearly and have a sober judgment of yourself so that you'll be able to go before God, like in Psalms in Psalms, it says in Psalms 51, with a contrite heart, saying that, Lord, I've sinned against you and you only have I sinned against. Because when we hurt other people, we we are not only hurting them, we're also hurting God. And I think that is the aspect that we need to really see because when we repair relationships with other people and with and also with God, is taking ownership of what I've done. Ownership of what I've done to hurt him and to hurt those that's in my life. There's no, y'all, I'm gonna say this, and I don't know if you agree with this, but I'm gonna just say it. We can't have true repentance if we're not taking ownership of what we've done to hurt someone or to hurt God. We cannot have true repentance if we don't take, if we don't see how I've hurt somebody or how I've hurt God. What are you changing if you don't know what you're changing or why you changing for? Because repentance means a change of mind, change of heart, and change of action. So am I really able to change if I'm not taking ownership of what I've done, to be in this position, to have to have forgiveness from him or have to have forgiveness from you? We have to take ownership. Y'all, this forgiveness thing is very deep and it's very heavy. And I talk to my clients about it a lot. A lot of my clients come to me dealing with grief or depression or anxiety and end up lean working and it ends up being connected to some form of loss or some form of loss of relationship or a hurt within relationship or for unforgiveness. And what unforgiveness does, y'all, it hurts us, it hurts our hearts. I want to read something to y'all first. I have two books before me. I want to reach y'all two books. One of the books is by Desmond Tutu and his daughter. It's called The Book of Forgiving. It's such a great book, it's a groundbreaking insight. It says the fourfold path for healing ourselves and our world. And he he and his daughter wrote this book basically from different perspectives. He wrote it because of uh them, they created. This apart after apartheid, they created this um reparations or this committee of reparations or ways to repair the relationships of South Africans. And the owner, the people who hurt people are the whites or the Dutch who hurt people, or even some of the blacks who had killed some of the whites. They had to take ownership of what they have done to the people that they hurt, understand how they hurt the other people, and they had to, it was a whole process that the people had to go through, those who had hurt people and those who were hurt, in order for them to be a part of this particular panel or part of this project, right? But he starts off with this in page 22, it says ultimately forgiveness is a choice we make. And the ability to forgive others comes from the recognition that we are all flogged and all human. That we are all flogged and all human. We all have made mistakes and harmed others. And we will again we find it easier to practice forgiveness when we can recognize that the role could have been reversed. So let me stop there. Let me go to something that says forgiveness is truly the grace by which we enable another person to get up and get up with dignity to begin anew. That is so cool. To get up and to get up with dignity to begin anew. It says, like self-hatred and self-contempt, hatred of others gnaws away at our vitals. That's what unforgiveness does. Whether hatred is projected out of stuck or stuck in, it is always corrosive to the human spirit. That's unforgiveness. He says, to forgive is not to pretend that what happened did not happen. That's something that's denial in itself. So to forgive doesn't mean stuffing it things down, it means recognize this is how you hurt me. And at the same time, going back to what he said, this is how I've hurt other people too. What we do sometimes with forgiveness or unforgiveness, we say that this person hurt me worse than what I've ever done to someone else. No, we can't say that. Well, sometimes we can say that. I'm gonna be admitted yeah, sometimes we we can say that, but sin is sin because we can look at God, and this is what God helped me with. God has forgiven me. I want to look at that scripture. Let's look at that right now, okay? In Matthew chapter 6. Let's look at that. Matthew 6 in verse 14 to 15. It says, For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly father will also forgive you. Listen to that. For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your father will not forgive your sins. Catch that. The reason the spirit helped me to understand this, the reason why is because think about how much you have been forgiven by God. And the sin that he went through in order to forgive you, in order to cleanse you so that you can have the chance of a relationship with him, to be reconciled with him. He didn't have to send Jesus, Jesus didn't have to die, but he chose to die. God chose to send his son for us on our behalf because he knew that if we did not have him die for us, that we wouldn't be able to be reconciled to him. But here's the thing with us, what we do is we look at that and we dismiss it in a sense we forget how much we've hurt God, and then we just focus on how much this person over here has hurt us. But with forgiveness, with sitting down with yourself, laying down, this is what I did for myself one time, writing down all the ways that I have hurt God, all the things that I've done against him that I need a forgiveness of. Oh, y'all, this is a hard thing to do, too. All the things I need a forgiveness of, and seeing that these are all the things that he's forgiven me for. And now look at what I'm holding unforgiveness towards this person. Look at what they've done. And they are flawed human beings too, just like I'm a flawed human being. So, who am I to hold this against them if God has forgiven me for all of these things? That's the thing, and I've had to really humble myself to recognize that and choose forgiveness, even if the person never admitted how much they hurt me. Oh, even if I never heard, I'm sorry. Because who is forgiveness for? Us. Y'all, let me read from my book, y'all. Okay. So in my book, I have two books out. This is my second book that I have. It's called Healing Inside Out, Outside In, Finding Peace Through Spiritual Healing. That's this when I have some mindfulness practices in this book, which I'm going to teach you in mindfulness exercise before we wrap up. But and my other book is 40 years of virgin while the way promoting purity in the world of promiscuity. And this is more about more about my life and walking with growing towards intimacy with God, growing in intimacy with God and ways that I had to go through and overcome in order for me to get there to maintain on this walk with God. Now, in this chapter seven, in this book, which you are both books are on Amazon, it says, forgiving other people. When you comprehend how the power of forgiveness may release you from negative states of affairs, it will become one of your most potent ongoing practices. This includes forgiving other people, situations, and likewise yourself. Forgiveness is a gift to give to yourself. Let me say it again. Forgiveness is a gift to give to yourself. It is not complicated, it's simple. Merely identify the situation to be forgiven and ask yourself: am I willing to squander my energy further on this issue? If the answer is no, then that's it. All is forgiven. Forgiveness is an act of imagination. It dares you to invest in vision, I can't pronounce my word, envision a greater future, one that's based on the blessed possibility that your anguish won't be the final word on that issue. It challenges you to forfeit your destructive thought about the situation and to trust in the possibility of a greater future. It builds up confidence that you may survive the pain and develop from it. Catch that. It builds up confidence that you may survive the pain and develop from it. Telling somebody is a bonus. Talking to somebody is a bonus. It is not essential for forgiveness to start the process that heals the harm. It is not essential for forgiveness to start the process that heals the harm. Forgiveness has little or nothing to do with a different individual because forgiveness is an inner manner. Again, forgiveness is for you. And what we do too is sometimes we can forgive other people, but not forgive ourselves for the things that we've done that place us in situations, or we can begin to beat ourselves up because of all the things we think are negative about ourselves, or I can't believe I just said that to that person. I can believe I did that, and we can go down this spiral. In order to break that, and I'm telling y'all, this is what I do for myself. In order to break that, we have to use acceptance. Let me tell you something right now. This is what I'm going through right now in my life. Right now, y'all, I had an accident, a car accident on this past week on Wednesday night. I was leaving church and I was driving down the street and I saw in the street an image or an object or whatever it was. I was like, and my mind, I got dazed. I was like, what is that in the middle of the street at this time of night? Right? And I didn't move over in enough time to miss the object. It was a piece of wood. And so my car, the oil panel, an oil pan underneath my car was hit, right? And oil leaped out of my car. Thank God that I made it home safely. And um, the engine didn't cut off on me until I made it to a park, my parking space. And I'm so grateful for that. But every part of me has been beating myself up because I didn't move. It's like forgiving myself for not moving. And my process in doing this or in forgiving myself is accepting that I didn't move. I can't change what happened, and it hurts, and I am frustrated, and I still can't go back and change my behavior or change what I did. Notice in my statement I didn't use a but because when we use buts, like but I should have, but I wish I did, but all that is doing is increasing the sadness or depression that comes along with unforgiveness, and is leading you further and further away from forgiveness and from really healing your heart. That's what we're talking about, y'all. When we talk about forgiveness, we talk about healing, healing your heart. What do we need to do to heal? And for me right now, to heal this space right now and my anxiety that's coming from me not moving my car, me having to wait for insurance companies to talk to me about what's next, is accepting that I didn't do it. I'm sad, accepting the emotions that come along with it, right? Not denying that they're there. Someone told me the other day, just put on a smile and go on as if everything is okay. I'm like, and I said to them, like, no, I can't do that. Because to me, that's fake. I can't do that. I am sad. This is where I'm at. I am hurt that my car is messed up. I am hurt because I paid it off and now I gotta possibly get another one. I I'm hurt by that. But all of that is about me being honest about what's happening right now in my life and not being in denial and dismissing or pretending that I'm okay when I'm not really okay. I am sad. And even at church today, uh people ask me how I was doing. I'm like, no, I'm sad. I didn't lie, like I talked about in the podcast in the first episode. I said, sometimes we say I'm fine, but we're not fine. We're lying in that moment. It's okay not to be okay. It's okay to say I'm not doing well right now. I'm not, and I'm hurt, you know, and I'm sad. And from doing that, guess what? It helped other people to pour into me. Other people gave them freedom to pour into me. What happens when we say fine? It's like we're pushing people away from doing their God-given gift, which means pouring love into you. I felt so loved by my brothers and sisters pouring into me about this situation. I it was like giving them permission, giving them freedom to love me. When we are not honest, when we're walking around in denial, we're not giving people freedom to love us. That's another thing. That's another harmful thing when it comes to being in denial. For us, we have to first see what we are doing, which ways and what ways in our thoughts are we walking in denial to hurt to harm ourselves. And let's talk about it. And you can tell sometimes, I think, when you're doing that. And let's, and even some people in your life, if you have people in your life that really know you, they can tell too and call it out in you so that you can get towards the healing. Healing. Y'all, that's what my ministry, that's what my counseling practice is all about. It's helping you to heal. My music, the voice that God has given me is to bring healing to you. And I pray that as you listen to this podcast, as you go and listen to my music, it's Anna Malika Miller, by the way. As you go and listen to my music, that it brings healing to you. As you go and get use my books, get my books, that my books bring healing to your life. That's the whole mission of my life. You know, not the whole mission, the whole mission. Yeah, it's a part of being healing, but the mission is for me to be in God and love God with all my heart, soul, and body, strength. All right, that is the mission. That's my purpose in all of these things. But I want to wrap up with the last scripture, okay? In 2 Corinthians chapter 5 and verse 17. And stay on because after I wrap up with this, I'm gonna teach you a mindfulness technique that you can use to help you with work through these emotions that may come up from listening to my podcast or come up from hearing the stories that I'm sharing. All right, and you can also go to my page. I have some mindfulness exercises on my YouTube page, my counseling YouTube page, love abundantly counseling, okay. Um, second Corinthians chapter five, and in verse 17. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come. The old has gone, the new is here. Hold on to that, catch that. If we are in Christ, we are a new creation, and denial cannot be a part of this new creation. If we're going to be transformed into the image of Jesus, we have to recognize this is who we are. And a part of being transformed into this new creation is recognizing the old things that the old is trying to hold against us that we're trying to hold on to that's a part of our old nature. That is the the the the walk that we have, this kind of like tangent space that we have. It's it's being aware of, okay, this is my nature, this is my character, and this is what I've done against God, the sins that I've done against God, and and this is who I can be. And over here, this is who I am in Christ. This old is gonna try to pull you back, but it's recognizing and being honest about it so that it won't entangle you, but so that you can confess it, talk about it, get prayer about it, and repent about it to continue to walk in the newness of who God has called you to be. Does it make sense? I hope it does. You can reach out to me if you have any questions about that. But right now, wherever you are, I want you to pause. I want you to sit back in your seat. If you're listening on at home, if you're listening while you're driving, leave your eyes open if you're driving. But if you're at home, sit back in your seat, in your chair, on your couch, and close your eyes. And I just want you to begin by taking a deep breath in through your nose and just hold it. And then breathe out of your mouth very slowly. Again, take another deep breath into your nose and hold it. And then breathe out of your mouth very slowly. One more time. Take another deep breath into your nose and hold. And then breathe out of your mouth very slowly. I want you to imagine that you're walking down a trail in a park. And as you walk down this trail in the park, you are able to see trees. You hear the birds in the distance. You can hear people talking and laughing. You feel the wind against your skin. You feel at peace and it is and at ease as you walk along this trail. You get to a part of the park where you can sit on a bench that overlooks a lake. As you sit on this bench and you look out at the water, you can see the water going back and forth. And you look up at the sky, and you can see a few clouds out. The sun is shining. And you look back at the water, you can see the sun reflecting on the water. In the middle of the water, you see a bubble floater. In this bubble, you can place a situation, a thought, an emotion. You bring up from your mind the situation and the thought, and you bring up from your heart the emotions, and you imagine it leaving you, floating away from you, from your mind and your heart, and floating into this bubble, and then you imagine a bubble floating up towards the sky, past the clouds, to a point where it's as far away from you, but you know it's before the throne of God, and you just leave it there, and then your eyes go back towards the water again, and you see another bubble float up, and in this bubble you place another situation of thought, an emotion, you bring up the situation of thoughts from your mind, and the emotions from your heart, and you imagine the situation of thoughts floating from your mind, and the emotions float floating from your heart, and going into the bubble, and then you imagine the bubble floating up towards the sky past the clouds to a point where it's far away from you, but you know it's before the throne of God, and you leave it there, and as your eyes go back towards the water, this time you take a deep breath in through your nose, and you breathe in peace, and you hold it, and on your exhale, you just let go and release anything, anything that you've been holding on to that you're now allowing to come up the surface again. Take another deep breath in through your nose and hold. And on your exhale again, release allowing peace to just flow through you and flow around you. Last one, breathe in peace and hold. And then on your exhale, just release it like go. And when you are ready, you can open up your eyes. That technique, you guys, is called the floating bubble. It's a technique that God allowed me to learn and that I use with my clients. It's a way of us, especially when we have trauma, of us bringing up to surface what we've been avoiding, what we've been denying, and facing it, and releasing it before the throne of God, where true healing comes from. I pray, you guys, that this is helpful to you. I pray that it meets you in this space where you are. And let me pray before before you before we wrap up, okay? Close your eyes, let's pray. Father God, thank you so much. Thank you for your grace, your mercy, your compassion, for your love, God. Thank you for not holding us. Sins against us, Father God, and allowing us to be clothed by your Son when we are baptized for the forgiveness of our sins, to be washed over by your blood. Cleanse, my Lord, so we can be pure before you, before your throne, able to stand right now in your presence, Father. Thank you. Thank you for allowing us to come into the Holy of Holies to feel your peace. God, you are a God who heals. And I pray for every listener right now who may be going through something in their lives right now in this space to allow you, to allow you to heal them in this space. Wherever they may be. God, take your fingers to touch your hearts. Allow your presence to be felt wherever they may be. And I pray for them to seek you in that space. Father, you promise that if we seek you with all our hearts, that you'll be found by us. I pray for each individual listening to this podcast, that they seek you with all of their hearts and that you reveal yourself to them. And that if it's your will that they choose them to belong to you, Father God. Because you sent many a call, but few are chosen. Thank you for choosing those who are listening and helping us to be true disciples of yours, lights in this world, Father God, beaming for you, Father. And anyone who is listening to this podcast that are not disciples, God, that are questioning where they are and they'll walk before you, God, I pray for you to have grace on them. I pray for you, guide their minds and their eyes up be open, Father God, to listen to your words, to see how deeply in love you are with them, in hopes that they want to study the Bible and to really examine what it means to walk with you. Only by you can that be done. Father, I love you so much, and I thank you so much for everything you do. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

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All right, you guys. Thank you so much for listening to a banoe love podcast.

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Thank you so much for listening to a Banoy Love Podcast. Thank you so much for listening to a Banoy Love Podcast. It is truly an honor to walk alongside you as we pursue healing, truth, and a deeper relationship with Jesus. If this episode encouraged you, would you take a moment to follow and subscribe to the podcast? Then leave a rating and review. It only takes a minute. But it helps others discover these conversations and become a part of our growing community. I'd also love to hear from you. Send me an email with your questions, testimony, prayer requests, or topics you would like me to cover in the future episodes. And if someone came to mind while you were listening today, don't keep this message to yourself. Share this episode with them. You never know how God may use it to bring hope, healing, or freedom. Finally, if this message or this ministry has impacted your life and you like to help us continue sharing biblical truth and encouragement all around the world, you can support Love Abundantly Ministry through a donation. Your generosity helps us continue in this message, continue this mission, appointing people to the life-changing love of Christ. Thank you again, y'all, for being here. Until next time, remember this. You are deeply loved, you are deeply known, and you are abundantly loved by God. Keep abiding in him, and I'll see you on the next episode. Thank you so much. It is truly an amateur. Would you take a moment to follow and subscribe to the channel?