Episode 22 - Jacked on Sobriety with Charlie Carroll

Welcome to Outside the Line - the podcast for cops who are learning to stay anchored in the real world.

This week I'm joined by Charlie Carroll - a friend, retired NYPD Detective, and founder of Jacked on Sobriety - an organization dedicated to supporting people struggling with addiction.

Charlie talks about his own struggle with alcohol, when he finally hit rock bottom, and how he came out stronger on the other side with a renewed sense of purpose.

Connect with Charlie:

https://www.facebook.com/people/Jacked-on-Sobriety/

https://www.instagram.com/p/DYNgoRBRwlk/

https://www.jackedonsobriety.com/

Connect with me:

https://www.jackedonsobriety.com/

https://www.instagram.com/outsidethelinepod

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

Welcome to Outside the Line, a podcast with conversations about keeping cops anchored to what really matters. Life outside the Simply Line. I'm your host, Dina Campbell, an active duty NYPD detective on a mission to normalize conversations around resilience and mental health and help cops develop self-awareness and an identity outside their career so they can enjoy life and thrive in the real world. Outside the line. Welcome back to Outside the Line, the podcast for cops who are learning how to stay anchored to the real world. Today I'm joined by Charlie Carroll, retired NYPD detective and peer counselor, also a friend who I met at work. And he's the founder of his new organization, Jacked on Sobriety. So, Charlie, thank you so much for joining us today. I am so happy you're here.

SPEAKER_00 0:56

Me too. It's a pleasure to be here.

SPEAKER_01 0:58

So if you I know likewise, if you wouldn't mind telling us how you got started in law enforcement and how long you were in.

SPEAKER_00 1:09

How did I get started in law enforcement? So I it's all coincidental, really. I um when I was at Seton Hall University, then YPD was there giving out a test. And uh I just happened to take the test and uh within a couple weeks they had called me, and uh the rest is history. But um I think that was my calling in the long run. I'm originally a Jersey Shore boy down from the Jersey Shore in Tom's River, and um how I ended up in the city that's that's providential, was being recruited while I was in college.

SPEAKER_01 1:46

So were you studying law enforcement?

SPEAKER_00 1:49

No, I was actually studying philosophy.

SPEAKER_01 1:51

Get out of here, yeah. That's awesome. So you were in for how many years?

SPEAKER_00 1:58

I did uh what was it, 18, 18 years?

SPEAKER_01 2:02

18 years. And how old were you when you came on the job?

SPEAKER_00 2:07

21.

SPEAKER_01 2:08

Oh, you were young.

SPEAKER_00 2:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

Do you feel like you were able to maintain an identity outside of work when you came on the job, or were you absorbed into like police culture pretty quickly?

SPEAKER_00 2:21

No, I was able to maintain an identity. I mean, like growing up in the Jersey shore, uh, was going back and forth mostly. You know, I had uh when I first got on, I had a shared apartment in Benson Hurst, Brooklyn, um, just to have roommates because we were making pennies at the time. And we it was a one-bedroom apartment, and there were three of us in this one bedroom apartment. And it's uh that was just to make ends meet at the time. And I was mostly when I was my days off, if we had any days off, I was going back and forth to New Jersey because that's where I was from. But I did my best to keep my identity, to keep my hobbies, to do what I was doing. But eventually we uh you get caught up in the cop culture, and eventually we went our own separate ways and I ended up getting an apartment on Staten Island, and uh that's where I spent most of my residency while with the department was on Staten Island.

SPEAKER_01 3:21

Do you think having roots at the Jersey Shore, like outside of the city, helped you know keep your identity intact?

SPEAKER_00 3:31

Yeah, I believe it did, honestly. Because I was able to have my own friends and my own identity in Jersey, and then when I came back to New York, I was Officer Charlie.

SPEAKER_01 3:40

So right. Now you and I met when when I got to EAU, but what did you do before you got there?

SPEAKER_00 3:48

Uh before I got to EAU, um, spent the majority of my career in bedstyle, Brooklyn, and PSA 3. And when they were getting ready to open, I want to say it was 2014, the 121 precinct in Staten Island. That's how I was able to get out of housing, put in a transfer to go to any Staten Island guy, got first dibs on Staten Island.

SPEAKER_01 4:13

Nice.

SPEAKER_00 4:14

But uh, they first transferred all of us before the 121 opened to the 120. And a long story short, I never left the 120. Um, once once the 121 opened, I ended up staying in the 120 and ended up doing day tour patrol for like six or seven years. Um made good partnerships, good friendships, and uh the 120 became my home.

SPEAKER_01 4:39

Nice. So then when did you get to EAU?

SPEAKER_00 4:44

I got to EAU, I want to say in 2017.

SPEAKER_01 4:50

Okay. And you were you were the borough rep for Staten Island, right?

SPEAKER_00 4:57

I was Staten Island at the time and Brooklyn South. We had both of them.

SPEAKER_01 5:02

Oh wow. And you were also you were ordained a deacon while you were an active duty uniform member, right?

SPEAKER_00 5:12

I was in 2019, yes, I was. By Cardinal Dolan for the Archdiocese of New York.

SPEAKER_01 5:17

That's so cool. Were you how many other cops do you know of that were active duty uniforms and an ordained deacon?

SPEAKER_00 5:26

Um not active duty, but I know a couple of retired guys that have become Catholic deacons.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

Yeah, I always thought that was really cool. So when so you did 18 years, what prompted you to leave the NYPD?

SPEAKER_00 5:44

Uh well, I had time built up also, prior time. Um, but also taking care of my I have two twin boys that are now 13 years old. And um, as a single dad, I had to step up to the plate to care for them. And as we know, on the job uh with details and overtime, and you don't know what tomorrow brings, and when you're doing everything by yourself, I had to make that decision that it was you know the right time for me to go, and um never look back to be honest with you.

SPEAKER_01 6:20

I mean, good for you per for putting your family first, for prioritizing, like, yes, this is my job. It's a decent, it's a great you know, career if you want it to be, but my family, you know, my children come before all of that.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

Right. I always have the philosophy that money you can always make money, but memories with your family you can't replace, especially with my boys. I missed out a lot of them growing up. So now um coach Charlie, um dad, I'm bro. My boys like to call me bro now. I'm lingo. But uh it's been it's been great, it's been a blessing in many, many ways.

SPEAKER_01 7:00

Good. How was the transition into retirement for you?

SPEAKER_00 7:06

Um it was good at first, and then um got into I guess a dark cloud, went down a dark path with alcohol. Um and it's coincidentally how I used to help people that were dealing with alcohol or pills or whatever it may be, and you always had that mentality that it ain't gonna happen to me, but you know what, it happened to me. And I was I think it was a lot of it had to do with stress on my life and different scenarios I was presented with, and it was very easy to go buy a case of beer and a pack of shots and just kind of try to drown that away, which when I look back at it now is not the right move, but I did it. And I was able to thankfully, you know, turn my life around. But there was a there was a time there where it was very they went down a really dark road.

SPEAKER_01 8:08

Well, I mean, thank you for for sharing and being honest, because there are so many people who still think that it can't happen to them for whatever reason, that they'll never get to that place, especially somebody who like yourself who used to help people when they were struggling with those things, like in the midst of a struggle. But it just goes to show you that we all go through different seasons of life and anybody can be there at any point.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

Right. And that's my advice. I always tell people to this day don't ever think it can't happen to you.

SPEAKER_01 8:44

Was there what was your turning point?

SPEAKER_00 8:48

So at my height, I was, believe it or not, 301 pounds. Um, I had really bad blood results, blood test results when I went to my doctor. Um, and I remember two things stick out to me uh from my turning point. The first one um was the doctor telling me my blood work was was awful, especially my liver enzymes, um, my glucose levels. Um, but he told me I was able to turn it around. He goes, but you need to stop drinking, number one, and you need to stop eating what I was eating. Two hard things. It's easy to tell a doctor yes, but it's also another thing to actually put it into action. So that was number one. Number two was I remember vividly uh sitting on a couch with a buddy of mine. We were watching, I don't know if it was baseball, we were watching something. And my son, one of my sons, walked in the apartment and asked if his friend can come in. And I remember looking over at him and I didn't get a chance to answer. I remember my son telling his friend, well, it doesn't matter, my dad's drunk again.

SPEAKER_01 10:01

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 10:02

And I didn't want to be known as the drunk dad, or I don't want my kids, but now I knew that my kids have are perceiving me as the drunk dad. And um right then and there is when I uh decided that I need to make a change. And when I was getting ready to make the change, I started doing it slowly, but then I um in April of last year in 2025, my best friend who I grew up with since we were god two, three years old, passed away suddenly in his sleep. And he was my best friend, my brother, uh, my quote-unquote drinking buddy. Um, always getting together, drinking beers, didn't matter what was on TV, as long as we had our beers, our shots, and each other, we were good to go. But uh, I remember getting that phone call from his sister that he passed away, and I just was with him the prior day, and I was in shock. Um didn't know what to say. I said there's that's not possible. We were just hanging out yesterday. We used to talk to him every day. But um, that was my main, besides the other reasons I stated, that was my main drive to get my life together because it's unfortunate that he had to pass, and it's unfortunate, you know, me losing him, but it's he's also still giving back today because he saved me and he changed me, and that's what brings me to doing what I'm doing today.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

That's a really great perspective. Before we get into what you're doing today, and I do want to I do want you to talk about that for everybody listening. What were some warning, like early warning signs, if you recognized them, that caused you to start drinking, or did you not recognize them until it was, you know, you were it was too late. Not too late, but you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_00 12:04

I I just think a lot of it was family stress and different expectations that were placed on my shoulders. Again, like I said, as a single dad taking care of two twin boys, um both my parents are deceased. Um, I do have siblings that have helped me out when they can, but when everything's relying on you, um, it was very easy to just like I said turn to that bottle or turn to those shots and try to join everything out. And um, I did do that, and it's uh it's very humbling now, you know, now that I'm talking about it for really for the first time.

SPEAKER_01 12:43

So but well, I'm honored that you're talking about it here, so thank you. You said that you started making small changes. What were the some of the first small changes that you started to make?

SPEAKER_00 12:56

So the main one was when if I was thinking about drinking, I would just go for walks. I would take a bottle of water with me or a can of Coke Zero, and I would just I would just go for walks because that was my mental way of A, I'm doing something physical, B, I'm not drinking. So by just taking the water and going for walks, it kind of cleared my head and didn't allow me to grab my car keys to go to the liquor store.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

That's a great way to to um, you know, I guess redirect, you know, that craving into something positive. And so I know, you know, you and I being peer counselors at one point, we saw people in a downward spiral, but there is also something, you know, called an upward spiral. So you start small and then these habits start stacking, and before you know it, you know, your physical health is improving, your mental health is improving. Can you speak on that? Were you did that happen to you at all?

SPEAKER_00 14:06

It did. So my journey, like I said, I started off with the walks. Um I would go just straight walks or literally seven days a week. Um I would eventually and this good. This went on for months. And the hard part was also my diet. Um, I was used to just buying fast food, pizza, processed foods. Um, that was another big change that I had to have the discipline to to change. And and I did do that. So instead of getting those value meals from McDonald's, you know, I was out buying chicken breasts, salmon, steaks, broccoli, spinach, white rice, and that was basically chicken, salmon, and white rice and broccoli and spinach were literally my go-to meals, probably six days a week on repeat.

SPEAKER_01 15:12

And did you did you track macros or anything like that?

SPEAKER_00 15:15

So that when I started doing all this, I did I did it the right way. And what I mean by that is I didn't go in just cold turkey. I did seek professionals to to help guide me, nutritionists. I had a life coach that I could call anytime, who someone who had similar experiences to me. But um, the thing that's been a real savior too has been the app My FitnessPal. Give them a shout out. There's other apps like it, but it allows me to go on and set my goal of what I wanted to do, how much weight I wanted to lose, how often and when, or by what time frame. I get it, let's me track my macros, every meal I have to stay under a certain amount of calories. But when I was trying to lose the weight and eat right, I literally kept myself at a strict 1600 calories. And I wouldn't go above it and I wouldn't go under it. I would always make sure I hit that 1600 calories every day between the carbs, the fats, and the protein. I was that guy that was hard to deal with for a while, as my friends would say. Um, we would go out, I would be bringing, I'm the guy that was bringing my own food because I didn't know what kind of food they were gonna have there. So I'd have a little tupperware of chicken and rice with me. I was that guy for a while. But um, and if I went out to eat, everything was plain because I know when you go to restaurants, they like to stack things with oils and butters. I would just ask for a plain chicken breast or a plain piece of steak with broccoli or spinach, whatever the vegetable the day was with nothing on it. And I would always like to flavor my stuff with hot sauce. I'm a big hot sauce guy, um, especially sriracha. And a lot of times it only has five calories minimum to no calories, and it also kind of like ignites your body because it gets you a little warm, so it helps towards the uh fat burning process as well. These are little things I learned with the nutritionist, but uh yeah, so that journey went on for a while until I lost what I wanted to lose, and um 16 months later, here I am, I'm down over 110 pounds, and um that went like I said, I started with the walks, and um, that was last May, this time last year, and then eventually in August, I ran my first 5k. I never thought I'd be doing that at the time.

SPEAKER_01 17:42

That's amazing. So you lost a whole person.

SPEAKER_00 17:47

I did. I had to get I had to buy a whole new wardrobe, to be to be quite honest.

SPEAKER_01 17:52

Good problem.

SPEAKER_00 17:53

Some of those clothes and some of the clothes that were tight on me look like curtains on me now. So it's so it is possible. If someone really out there listening wants to change, it's gonna take that level of a person, that level of discipline where you're gonna upset some people. I've lost some friends along the way, but at the end of the day, they're not your real friends. If they can't, you know, accept you wanting to better yourself, they can't accept you not wanting to drink or do drugs, whatever you're doing, those are not your real friends. So don't worry about losing them because you're gonna gain much better ones along the way. You're gonna feel good, and then it's it's all about you at that point.

SPEAKER_01 18:35

That's uh that's a really good point. What advice would you have for somebody who feels like they don't have enough time to meal prep or they don't even know where to get started?

SPEAKER_00 18:49

I had the same issue. But at the end of the day, you know, when I had a life coach, uh he's one of the best. Um you always have time. You make time. If it's important to you, you're gonna make time. Whether it's you know, you're doing this with your kids, which I still do. I have my kids' schedule, their sports schedule, I have my gym schedule. Um, still working. I plot everything in my day, and it works. But you you have to kind of plan it out to make it work. But you're always gonna have time. Like, you know, for instance, I still do my run. I'm running a 5k a day, so that 3.2 miles, but I'm doing it at 4.30 in the morning.

SPEAKER_01 19:32

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 19:33

Five days a week. Um, I have people drive past me, they see me out there running, and there it's it encourages people, I can tell because I I noticed some other people, I'm not usually the only one out there that early in the morning running, but now I'm starting as the weather's getting warmer, I'm seeing other people out there getting their cardio in or walking their dogs, and they they told me, you know, you inspired me to to get out there and get moving. So there's always time. You just gotta make it. If you want it, you go find time. You just gotta want it.

SPEAKER_01 20:04

That's amazing. Just you showing up for yourself every day inspires others. If if you hear my dog in the background, I apologize. That's life. But um, so what did your kids say when you started making all of these changes?

SPEAKER_00 20:22

They were uh they're impressed. They're they're they're looking up to me now, like I'm their superhero, and that's what I'm supposed to be as their dad. I'm supposed to be their first superhero. And now I show them you know, you eat right, you go to the gym, you take care of yourself, and uh they're doing the same now.

SPEAKER_01 20:39

So that's awesome. So what got you started? That all right, I'll get into that in a minute. My first question is what were some preconceived notions that you had, if any, about seeking professional help, you know, a nutritionist and a life coach to get started?

SPEAKER_00 21:04

Well, it goes back to when we were peer counselors, you know, like the cop mentality is like, I don't need this stuff, I don't need this, I could do it on my own. But in reality, you can't. I tried for a day or two and I failed miserably. Um, because I guess I wasn't at that level where I could do it on my own. I mean, now I'm doing it on my own, but I needed that person to kind of you know put the wrench to my back, as you would say, and get me rolling and keep me on the right path. And what if I was starting astray? I always had that person to call. And always had that support, and support's a big one. That's huge. So, people out there, if you have a best friend, you have a support system, that's huge. Don't do it on your own.

SPEAKER_01 21:54

Yeah, and if you don't, that leads us into what you're doing now. So do Want to talk about that?

SPEAKER_00 22:01

So since I went through this massive transformation, over the last six to eight months, I had this idea of wanting to give back to people who maybe where I was, whether they were addicted to drugs, alcohol, food, whatever addiction it may be. It doesn't have to be any of those, but something that's controlling your life to the extent where you're losing control and you're losing your life and you're losing your family and you're losing your kids. Because I was there. And um, I had this idea of wanting to help people. I did not know how to do it. Um, so I had to consult with a couple friends of mine. Again, these are friends I met along the way during my own personal transformation. And my best friend JJ, the one who passed away, um gave me the encouragement to do this. And it's something I just felt in my heart. Um didn't have a name, and then that name, as we I like to call it now, Jack on Sobriety, popped into my head because I turned my life around using health and fitness. I'm not saying that everybody that's in recovery or looking for sobriety can just right away turn to health and fitness. Um, some people, you know, they might need a therapist or they might need the doctors or the clinicians. Um, I didn't need that. I was able to have a support system where I could talk things out. Um, I developed that mindset where I was gonna do it no matter what, and no one was gonna stop me. And so I started to roll out this idea because they're only ideas, but they're no good to anybody unless you put it into action. So, about a month ago, really, I just started putting Jack Don's sobriety into tuition. We started, I started a Facebook page, and then with the Facebook page, I started a private group because a lot I know for myself too, a lot of people don't might not want to share their story or may not want to share what's going on on a page, but in a private group, they might want to do that. So we have both of those going right now on Facebook. We also have an Instagram page, and they're all easily acceptable. Um, excuse me, they're accessible. Just type in Jack Don Sobriety and it pops right up.

SPEAKER_01 24:38

Um I'll link it in the show notes for people.

SPEAKER_00 24:41

Our logo is like is made with a wait bar, so you really can't miss it. Um, we also have a X page now, you know, formerly Twitter. And um this Saturday, um sorry, Sunday coming up, May 17th, is my one year sobriety.

SPEAKER_01 25:01

Congratulations.

SPEAKER_00 25:03

Thanks. We're going to be launching a official website, jackdonsobriety.com. And it's gonna have resources on there for health and fitness weight programs. Um, I'm a big uh proponent of self-recovery.org. It's uh for someone who, if they have my mentality, then might need that person to talk to and want to try to do recovery on their own. It's all confidential, it's in your own house, everything's online. It's not NA, it's not AA, it's one-on-one, and it's programs geared to your specific need. So that's gonna be up on our website as well, as well as MASA on demand, which is a whole broad access to different workouts you can do on your own at home, uh in groups or one-on-ones. I also threw up a picture of a gym routine for someone who's into weightlifting. Um, I just started I started weight training in November. Um, because up until then it was straight cardio for me, the walks and running. And then once I lost the weight I wanted to lose, and now it was time to build some muscle. So I started weight training and again met with a personal trainer, did it the right way, got into a routine. So that's I still do that six days a week. So I threw the gym schedule up down. It's gonna be on our website that shows you what you can do each day and how many reps and how many sets and stuff like that. And it's just there's gonna be space. We're gonna do some testimonials, and it's really for those in recovery, those who are addicts, because I'm still addict no matter what you say. Um, we're always in recovery. As I like to say, I wear a wristband, you know, one day at a time. And the best advice I always give to people is you know, when they it doesn't matter if you're a day sober, 10 days sober, a year sober, when they uh they're struggling. I said, always remember it every day of your life is day one. And when you have that mentality and you keep reacting day one in your head, it keeps you keep keeps you going and keeps me away from the booze. And that's the best advice I can give people. Just remember every day is day one.

SPEAKER_01 27:25

That's great advice because then it's less overwhelming, you know. Like, oh, I can, you know, the idea of being sober forever is hard to wrap your mind around. But if you just say, like, you know, that's if somebody's thinking I can't do that forever, well, can you do it today? Yeah, I can do it today, you know, and then every day just start over. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 27:50

I'm also gonna have my uh to show people that it is possible. Like I'll have, you know, I I will show my transformation pictures on there because I was 301 pounds 16 months ago, and I was uh I was very overweight, bloated, and I really and I it was all from drinking and eating poorly and just making bad life choices and no exercise. And now I'm uh I have one of my goals that I'm gonna reach, and uh I'm dedicated. Like I said, I have that level once I commit to something, I do it. So I'm gonna be doing like a bodybuilding show eventually, and uh that's awesome. Uh went from 301 pounds down to 190 now, is where I'm at. And um just good things ahead.

SPEAKER_01 28:37

Yes, recovery is always possible. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 28:44

We're also gonna have, you know, on our website, there's gonna be a store if people want to support the mission. Uh, as far as t-shirts, I have one special shirt made from my best friend who passed away. It's uh it's in his memory. It's because of really because of him, and my transformation is why I started this because I wanted to get really give back to those out there who don't know where to turn, who are struggling. I just it's just a thing I wanted to do on a personal level. So I'm glad this is rolling out. I'm glad I had people help me with the website and getting this stuff rolling because uh I'm not good with this kind of stuff, but I've had a lot of good supports, you know, through my transformation, through my health journey, through my recovery. And now all I wanted to do is give back to all those who don't know where to turn, is you do have a place to turn. That is us, jacked on sobriety. Check us out.

SPEAKER_01 29:37

And who better to help somebody than somebody like you who's who's lived through it? You know, it's one thing when you're cheering somebody on from the sidelines, because we all need support, but when you have somebody like you who has lived it these past 16, 18 months, um, that really is a stronger, not buy-in, but it's it's it's just more relatable because if somebody can look at you and be like, well, he was where I am right now. So if he can do it, then I can do it.

SPEAKER_00 30:14

And that's the whole mission statement of our our Jack on Sorbide. Um, once we launch the webpage, hopefully within the next few days here. Um, that's our mission statement, is especially from my angle. I was in your shoes, I know how you feel. I've been there. I was alcohol, but it doesn't matter if yours is alcohol, yours is drugs, yours is food, yours is whatever it may be.

SPEAKER_01 30:35

Could be gambling, pornography, any of it, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:38

Right. And some people just don't or they're embarrassed, they don't want to speak to somebody one-on-one. But this is where this will come in, and how you can really use your own self and your physical fitness, you know, the walks, the gym to really turn your life around. Because it is possible. I did it. So I can test, I am testimony that that will work, but you have to have a level of self-discipline and self-respect for yourself in order to achieve it.

SPEAKER_01 31:10

And for those who don't think that they are worth having respect for, you are. You're worth it. So, how has transforming your physical self affected your mental health? Because I know you said for a while you were in a dark place.

SPEAKER_00 31:38

Someone who I never took my shirt off now, I don't mind taking my shirt off because I'm at that level where I'm building something personally, whether you know my physique and I feel with the warm weather coming now, I'm not afraid to take my shirt off now. And I was for a very long time afraid to take, I was ashamed of who I was, what I was. And didn't matter if I went to the beach or a swimming pool. I always had the t-shirt on.

SPEAKER_01 32:06

And I mean, there's definitely something to be said for building up your self-confidence in transforming yourself because there's a lot of shame in the beginning, and that's what contributes to the stigma. Like people are too ashamed to seek help.

SPEAKER_00 32:23

Yeah. Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 32:27

What is your dream for Jack Down sobriety long term?

SPEAKER_00 32:32

Well, my dream is that if people need it, that they use it. That's what it's there for. It's it's made of real people, really myself, my story. I'm hoping that this branches out where we get more of people like myself that are willing to share their testimony, to share their statement, whether they've been on a transformation journey or they don't know where to start. This Jack on Sobriety is for you. We're gonna have the resources, we're gonna have my email is up there. They can reach out to me directly. And um, my my long-term goal is that if someone needs it, that they they utilize it. And there's really not you, even a family member or someone out there that you know is suffering silently, just mention jacked on sobriety to them. You just put it in Google, it will pop right up.

SPEAKER_01 33:27

Yeah. And you know, there's a lot to be said for social media in uh as virtual support groups and and accountability, because like you said, it takes discipline. And if people don't have that, or if they don't have the self-respect yet or the confidence that they can do it, they can borrow it from somebody else in the group who is supporting them and walking alongside them, you know, on their journey.

SPEAKER_00 33:58

Right. And then, you know, I know a lot of I'll put the cop angle in there. As we know, being cops, a lot of cops are are too macho, I guess you would say, to seek help. I mean, even when we're a peer counselor is just trying to get someone to talk about their feelings, as we know, is a challenge. So here it doesn't matter. Jack on Sobriety doesn't matter if you're a cop, if you're a civilian, we're here for you. I want to make sure that the resources are there for you to help with your health journey, to help with your transformation, to help you break whatever addiction is holding you back, to make you the best version of you that you could be. That's the ultimate goal of our Jack Dawn sobriety.

SPEAKER_01 34:48

That's perfectly said because I and I like that you you're not it's not just limited to the sobriety, isn't limited to just alcohol, because like you said, it could be anything, you could be addicted to anything, really.

SPEAKER_00 35:07

Everybody has a vice. My personal vice was alcohol, but it it doesn't matter what your addiction is, the resources are all the same. And um, yeah, that's that's my mission. My I want to give back because I went through it. It's hard, especially if you have no one. And there might be someone out there that doesn't want to speak to anybody or doesn't want that one-on-one. This is where we come in as a community and reach out and we'll get what you need.

SPEAKER_01 35:39

Where can people find you?

SPEAKER_00 35:43

As far as our jacked on sobriety.

SPEAKER_01 35:45

I know you said Facebook and Instagram, and that's what you said?

SPEAKER_00 35:50

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 35:51

All right, I'll put all the links down below. And your website is going live May 17th.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

It's gonna go up within the next couple of days.

SPEAKER_01 36:00

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

Um, it's gonna be www.jackdonsobriety.com.

SPEAKER_01 36:10

Okay. Oh, one more another question that I thought of uh while you were speaking. Going through this transformation, uh specifically with your life coach, did that change the way that you communicated with people in your life? Did that change your relationships with family and friends?

SPEAKER_00 36:34

It did because when I was having my battle with alcohol, I uh was not able to do things unless it involved alcohol. And what I mean by that is if I went to a party or if it was a kid's party and there was no alcohol there, I wasn't interested. I wasn't going. If we didn't go to a restaurant that didn't serve alcohol, I wasn't going. So when people like went to diners where there was no alcohol or anywhere, I wasn't going. I wasn't interested because I had to have a drink with everything I was doing.

SPEAKER_01 37:06

And I know you said that you oh go ahead, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00 37:10

But no, that's where you like subconsciously, I didn't, I was just drinking. Other people were telling me you're drinking too much. You're like, why do you always gotta drink all the time? But in your, you know, as an addict, first thing I'm gonna say is I don't have a problem. I'm fine. But in hindsight now, I wasn't fine. I didn't need to be drinking the way I was drinking. I didn't need to drink at a child's party. I didn't need to go out to eat and have a drink.

SPEAKER_01 37:40

And it's easy for us to lie to ourselves, but when you have, you know, when your own children see it and kind of hold up a mirror for you, it's like, damn.

SPEAKER_00 37:50

One of the major things, too, is when you're addicted, that comes first. So I was very agitated all the time. Like if uh my friends needed something, or if my kids especially needed something, I'll do it later. Again, very angry, very quickly. Um, you're always on edge. Um, so that's another thing, you know, that's a sign too. You know, just just being agitated all the time, angry. Um because when you have a problem, you do try your best to conceal it.

SPEAKER_01 38:23

And I know that you said you did have a lot of support on this journey, but you also said that you lost some friendships over this. How did you handle that? And were you surprised by the loss of your friendships?

SPEAKER_00 38:36

No, I wasn't surprised. Um, you know, you'll get it now. Like, I had friends like they don't realize like it's probably to make them feel better about themselves. Like, oh, why won't you have a drink with me? I'm like, because I have enough evidence to why I can't drink. But I think it's more they don't want to drink alone, so they try to convince you to drink. Oh, you can just have one. No, I can't have one. So if I have one, it's gonna turn into 10. And I have, like I said, enough evidence to show that I shouldn't be drinking anymore. But when you're not living that lifestyle, and some people like to live that lifestyle, you're no good to them anymore. So I took, you know, those people are not your real friends, and they can't accept you because you don't want to drink or you don't want to do drugs or you can't do something, then they're not your real friends. And there's gonna there's a for every one of those, there's 10 more that are gonna support you, who are gonna be there for you, who are gonna be proud of you. And um, I had that too. I still have some really great friends that are um some people that haven't seen me in a while just saw me recently too, and they recognized me. They're like, there's no way, like last summer you were a completely different person. Like, but but it takes a level of of discipline to to get there. And I keep using that word discipline because it is what it is. It's you do things that you don't want to do, but at the end of the day, you get the results.

SPEAKER_01 40:04

So a lot of people think of discipline has such a negative, you want to talk about stigma, has such a negative association with it. But I I think it has to be reframed. And actually, since you and I are both Catholic, I heard Father Mike Schmitz once make a reference to discipline kind of being like like a fenced-in yard that's like on a cliff. So if you you you can go wherever you want as long as you stay inside the fence, but as soon as you go outside the fence, you're dropping off the cliff. So it's it's not a bad thing, it's it's you know, to keep you on track.

SPEAKER_00 40:44

I agree. I always like the quote from uh Mike Tyson, said it best when he was training hard back in his championship days boxing, and they asked him about discipline. And he said, you know, his quote was, you know, discipline is doing what you don't like to do, but doing it like you love it. And I know he's that always stuck with me.

SPEAKER_01 41:05

Yeah, that is a good one.

SPEAKER_00 41:08

Because yeah, I mean, on like me personally, do I like did I like going out with my friends to dinner and having bland vegetables and steak? No, while they're eating chicken parm and spaghetti and meat sauce, no, but again, that's the level you need if you want to take you seriously and you want to reach your goal, you need that level of discipline.

SPEAKER_01 41:31

How has this and I don't I don't know if it has maybe this is the wrong question, but did it start off as a diet and end up as a lifestyle, or did you go in with the mindset that this was just how your life was going to be from now on?

SPEAKER_00 41:46

No, I went with the mindset of I had to change and just eat whole foods. Um, so I don't I bake everything. Um, one of the best investments I bought, believe it or not, I didn't have one for the longest time until a couple months ago was an air fryer.

SPEAKER_01 42:03

Aren't they amazing?

SPEAKER_00 42:04

They are talk about convenience. I can make my steak perfect the way I want to make it, which for me, it's gotta be bloody rare. I love my steak rare. But uh, cook my chicken in there, my salmon, I cook everything in there. So you're then you're not using oils or nothing. It's just as is, it's healthy. Um, I bake all my stuff. I can't even tell you the last time I had something fried. But um, it's become a lifestyle at this point. At first it was a little difficult, but then it gets very it gets easier, and now it's just part of me. I don't even think twice about stuff now. It's it's just part of my routine and part of my daily regimen and my life at this point.

SPEAKER_01 42:42

Good. Did you think you were gonna miss it?

SPEAKER_00 42:46

You always think you're gonna miss it, but then I'm like, I like the way I feel now. So when I put that up in the you know, foremost in my mind, it's not going back. So good.

SPEAKER_01 43:01

Was there anything that you wanted to mention that I didn't ask you about?

SPEAKER_00 43:05

No, just um I just want to reiterate again. Like we're here. I started this just to give back, and I hope someone listening, if they do feel hopeless and they feel like they can't beat whatever's going on, I'm here to say you can do it. But you gotta make that mindset, you gotta make yourself accountable, and you gotta get to that level of discipline. But we're gonna we'll be a resource for you to help guide you there. And like I said, you're not gonna be you can try to do it alone, but you won't succeed. You're always better off having people in your corner, people who've lived it, people who can guide you, and you'll always have a friend in Jack and sobriety.

SPEAKER_01 43:52

I love that, and I I love the support and the accountability, and the fact that even though you've made this incredible transformation, you consider yourself still in recovery. It's not like there's a finish line, this is it, this is the weight I wanted to lose, now I'm done. You know, no, it you're it's a continuous lifestyle change.

SPEAKER_00 44:20

And it gets easier. Yeah, people are afraid of uh change, as I always say, I'm afraid of change, but things get easier. And it becomes a part of your life and you don't even think twice about it.

SPEAKER_01 44:33

Yeah. So anybody out there, if you're looking if you're struggling with any sort of addiction, whatever it is, um definitely look up Jack Don Sobriety, Facebook, Instagram, X, and then their website. And like I said before, I'll link it all in the show notes. Charlie, thank you so much for being here. It was great catching up with you and talking to you. And I'm so proud of you and I wish you all of the success with this for for you and again for anybody out there who might need it because like you said, you know, you just really want to give back and I know you will in a big way. Last question because I like to end on a high note what is your favorite karaoke song?

SPEAKER_00 45:18

Oh coincidentially this is going to mind blow a lot of people. When I did sing obviously it was during when I was in my bar days my drinking days my number one song was George Thoroughgood, one bourbon, one scotch and one beer.

SPEAKER_01 45:33

If that's not fitting thank you so much again for being here Charlie and thank you guys for listening. In case you haven't heard today you are loved you matter and you are not alone thank you so much for stepping outside the line with me today. If you enjoyed this episode consider sharing with a friend or to your social media network. And if you do please tag me so I can reach out and thank you. The views and opinions expressed in this podcast are personal opinions not reflective of the host or guest department. This podcast is for entertainment purposes only. If you're struggling with your mental health please seek professional help. Resources are available. In case you haven't heard today you are loved, you matter and you are not alone