Love in a F*cked Up World
Why do so many of us act our worst in relationships? How can we hold on to our liberatory values even when strong feelings are involved? For 25 years, Dean Spade has been working in movements for queer and trans liberation and to end police, prisons, immigration enforcement, and war. In his new podcast, Love in a F*cked Up World, Dean and his guests offer concrete tools for building and sustaining strong relationships, because our connections to each other are the building blocks of our resistance.
Love in a F*cked Up World
Introducing: Love in a F*cked Up World with Dean Spade
For over 25 years, Dean Spade has been working in movements for queer and trans liberation and to end police, prisons, immigration enforcement, and war. His new podcast, Love In A F*cked Up World, offers concrete tools and conversations about how we can build and sustain strong relationships, because our connections to each other are the building blocks of all of our movements.
Dean: [00:00:00] I'm Dean Spade. For 25 years I've been working in movements for queer and trans liberation and to end police, prisons, immigration enforcement, and war. My new podcast, Love in a F*cked Up World, focuses on how we can build and sustain strong relationships, because our connections to each other are the building blocks of all of our movements.
Weyam: Why is it that we lose our principles in relationships and how do we not?
Dean: I talk to people all the time dealing with conflicts, with friends, lovers, roommates, collaborators, trying to sort out things like how to give and receive direct feedback, how to deescalate a crush, and how to deal with strong feelings like jealousy and possessiveness.
adrienne: What I have learned in my own life, the most harm has come when I have been succumbing to a possession based relationship. And the most liberation has come when I have been like, you are your own person, and I am my own person.
Dean: In Love in a F*cked Up World. I spend time talking with people who've inspired my thinking on these topics, like Prentis Hemphill, Mariame Kaba, Morgan Bassichis, and [00:01:00] adrienne maree brown.
Mariame: Thanks for having me on the podcast. I'm curious and I'm interested.
Tourmaline: I'm excited to really get into the deep dive.
Dean: I also offer concrete tools we can use to address the problems that people ask me about the most.
Weyam: These grounding reminders. One of the ones that I loved was, "The strong feelings I am having will pass. I don't have to act on them. I can make choices to fuel them or dampen them. I have a choice here." I just want a tattoo, like, "I have a choice here" on my forearm.
Dean: Over the next few months, I'll be releasing a new episode of Love in a F*cked Up World every two weeks.
You can find the show wherever you get your podcasts. I hope you'll listen, share with your friends, and subscribe.
Morgan: Do you hear the chimes?
Dean: I do.
Morgan: And I, that's my politics. Just name what's there and there's chimes. Okay?
Dean: It feels so good.
Morgan: So I just wanna say, the chimes in the room.
Dean: Yeah. Calling it in.