Teaching in the Trenches: The Reality Behind Classroom Doors | S1E2

Are teachers just educators — or secret social workers, therapists, and supply closets rolled into one?

In this powerful episode, veteran educator Cathy Tooley pulls back the curtain on what it really takes to teach in America’s classrooms today. From heartbreaking stories of kids carrying trauma to the invisible burdens teachers shoulder daily, Cathy shares raw truths and inspiring moments that reveal the humanity behind the profession.

🎓 Highlights:

• The real reasons students act out in class (and why sending them to the office doesn’t solve it)
• A moving story of a teen who’d never been told she was beautiful — until her teacher said it
• How teachers balance lesson plans with feeding hungry kids, navigating abuse, and being emotional anchors
• Why teaching is a calling, not a “fallback career”
• Words of faith and hope for educators questioning if they can keep going

Whether you’re a teacher, a parent, or simply curious about what’s happening behind classroom doors, this episode will open your eyes — and your heart.

📚 Cathy Tooley is the author of “The Education System is Broken” and a passionate advocate for educators everywhere. 

Listen, subscribe, and share this episode to support the unsung heroes of education.

Step into growth and purpose! Discover my books and resources designed to help you lead, learn, and live with impact.

✨ Click here: https://t-sml.mtrbio.com/public/smartlink/toolsforsuccess

//About

Cathy Tooley is the Founder & CEO of Tools for Success and a seasoned educator with over 40 years in K–12 classrooms and school leadership. From high school teacher to principal, Cathy has dedicated her life to supporting educators. In 2014, she launched Tools for Success to provide real, in-person instructional coaching—not just “PD in a box.” She’s the author of The Education System Is Broken, a national speaker, and a fierce advocate for teachers. Through this podcast, she’s spotlighting the ripple effect of great teaching.
🔗 Website | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn

Transcript

Introduction to Teaching in the Trenches

Cathy Tooley 0:00

A few years ago I wrote a book . I want to read a couple excerpts from my book , called the Education System is Broken . It said not every person should teach and not everyone can teach . That's not meant to hurt anyone's feelings of anyone who is or is considering being a teacher , or to make any other statement other than teaching is not for everyone . If a student got in trouble , I never sent them to administrators . I kept them with me , and here's why I have to get at the root of what's going on . You're not just talking out in class because you don't know that . I'm expecting you to be quiet . You're not stupid . You're talking out in class and I got to figure out why . Because you and I are never going to get to where I can educate you if I can't get to have a relationship with you . I have story after story that is forever in my heart of what kids would tell me . It just broke my heart . Teaching is an innate gift . You either have it or you don't . It can be honed and made better . They saw their life's purpose as being a teacher . So I need you to get a high school diploma so you could get a decent job . I'd like for you to go out and get a college , and it got her chuckling . I did that on purpose to loosen it , and I said because you're here , because in my room , samantha , I want you to learn more than Spanish . Spanish is what I paid to teach you , but I want you to learn how to respect people , and when you talk , when I'm talking , I experience it as disrespectful . It's disrespectful to me , and so I want to teach you about respect In the trenches . The reality is , we will do whatever we have to do , which includes supplying their needs and meeting their emotional needs to get them educated . Hi everybody , kathy Tooley , thanks so much for joining us today . Boy , I'm ready for this topic . Today we're going to talk about teaching in the trenches . Like I really want to give those of you that are not educators , I'm going to pull back the curtain on what's happening . This is not a trash talk of education . This is a reality . So it's a reality of what's happening in our school . As you know those of you that have been watching the podcast I've been around education now for 40 years 20 years in the classroom teaching and 10 years in the building as an administrator . So I've been around education my whole life and it's always interesting to me when I watch TV shows . You know there's a lot of them out there that are really good about schools and some of them I can laugh at and some of them I think what school have you been at ? Because no one that I know is teaching like that . A few years ago I wrote a book . I want to read a couple excerpts from my book called the Education System is Broken , but one of the I call all of the chapters , if you will , curtains , because what I really did in this book was pull back the curtain , if you will , and tell you what's happening in education . And I'm old so I have to put my glasses on . So I'm going to read a couple excerpts from you .

Cathy Tooley 2:50

It said not every person should teach and not everyone can teach . That's not meant to hurt anyone's feelings of anyone who is or is considering being a teacher or to make any other statement

Teaching as a Calling

Cathy Tooley 3:02

other than teaching is not for everyone . Teaching is not that fallback profession when everything else in your life didn't seem to work out . So you decide well , I guess I'll teach . Teaching is a calling . Teaching is life's work . It is and will always be about the heart . Teaching has to begin with the heart and with that intimate knowledge that it is above everything else that we've talked about thus far and everything that will yet to be talked about in this book , the definition of who a human is to become a teacher . Successful teachers have the heart for teaching , one of the things I've known my whole life , and I've had the beauty now as an administrator , of hiring incredible teachers . Teaching is an innate gift . It is you either have it or you don't . It can be honed and made better . It can be . Skills can always get stronger , but you know it , and so when I interviewed people , what I was looking for was a passion , was someone that had that passion . They saw their life's purpose as being a teacher . I always think there's a difference , too , between you know . I hear people say all the time well , I left that profession because it just didn't fulfill me , or I left that job because it just didn't complete me , or I decided that I would change complete careers because I always knew that I wasn't meant to do that . I never had that experience . From the day that I was born , I knew I wanted to be a teacher , and truly , truly , truly gifted teachers know that too . Now , sometimes they took a different road to get there and I always use my mom as an example . My mother retired and when they moved to Florida she went back to nursing school at 51 years old . And when I asked her mom , why are you doing this ? I mean , dad was of retirement age , he was a little older than she was and she said asked her mom , why are you doing this ? I mean , dad was of retirement age , he was a little older than she was and she said because I always wanted to be a nurse . But four kids came along before nursing school could and I've seen many teachers come through our field that way . They chose to stay home , or maybe they took a job out of college , or maybe they went to college to study one major , but there was just this gnawing , this gnawing in them that I am meant to be in a classroom . That's who I want to talk to today . We need you . We need you . Teaching is not something that you can just decide . Well , I'm going to go into education because I get summer's off or Christmas break off or go talk to a teacher about what that really looks like or doesn't look like . I don't have time on this episode to talk about that , but teaching is something that you innately know you were called to do and that's what makes successful teachers Successful . Teachers are successful because it's their calling , it's their purpose , just like anything in life . So I'll step away from education for a moment . Anyone who is happy , truly fulfilled in what it is they're doing every day ,

Modern Challenges Educators Face

Cathy Tooley 6:12

is happy and fulfilled because they're doing their calling . People think it's about money . Well , I'll be happy and fulfilled when I make $200,000 or $300,000 or $500,000 a year , and sure , making more money is nice , but my dad used to say this all the time you will spend as much as you make and you will not what you don't . My husband was a medic and I was a teacher for years and we raised three kids and had a house , and you can look in this camera . It doesn't look like I've starved to death in my life , but we did with what we had , on the salaries that we had . We were happy . So many people are out chasing a dollar instead of not living in their purpose . And if you're living in your purpose , my dad used to say all the time , you'll never work a day in your life If you love what you do and you're doing what the Lord called you to do . You'll never work a day in your life , but teaching in the trenches is hard . It's hard . We expect so much of our educators today . There was a day that I remember because you know I'm as old as you know . It's been a while that the most important thing that I had to worry about every day was my curriculum , my assessments and teaching . And now , as we coach teachers with my company every day , they get to be the guidance counselor . They have to first make sure the child is clothed . Schools' responsibility have taken on feeding . We now have more social workers in our schools today than what we did five years ago . We have to—CPS is involved on almost a daily basis . Police and security are heightened beyond belief than what I . I mean . There was no such thing as an armed security guard walking my building 40 years ago . So kids are scared , kids are not always safe , they're hungry and many of them are abused . And then they walk into your classroom , those teachers' classrooms , and it's their job to teach them math and science and English and social studies and all of the specials that are so , so , vitally important to students . That's the reality of a teacher I can remember so many times , and I taught high school . I think my elementary colleagues in many ways have it worse , because my high school students could at least verbalize what was wrong with them . A kindergartner or first grader doesn't necessarily have the vocabulary to verbalize that , but my high school kids did and I lost track of the times that students would choose to come eat their lunch with me . I always did my own detentions If a student got in trouble . I never sent them to administrators . I kept them . Tip for you teachers . I kept them with me . And here's why I have to get at the root of what's going on . You're not just talking out in class because you don't know that . I'm expecting you to be quiet . You're not stupid . You're talking out in class and I

Samantha's Story of Respect

Cathy Tooley 8:54

got to figure out why . Because you and I are never going to get to where I could educate you if I can't get to have a relationship with you . So I would keep them in detentions and I lost . I have story after story that is forever in my heart of what kids would tell me . That just broke my heart , that it's not anything that I went through , not anything that my three children went through , and I think how are you even here today . So I want to share a couple of them with you today , because they're just a cherry on top of the sundae that is the trenches of what educators are living in today . I had a student sit with me one day after school typical kid , you know . She just wouldn't be quiet . Now I can personally relate , as someone who loves to talk a lot . She just I swear , and then every time I would say something to her . Let's call her Samantha . You know I would call her out in class . Samantha . You know , why are you talking ? She always did the I'm not talking . Any of you teachers relate with that . Right , when I saw her mouth move , I know she was talking . So she was serving a detention , wasn't her first one ? Most of the other detentions prior to that she pretty much clammed up . I tried to talk to her but you could just tell she had decided that I was her arch nemesis . It probably took me four or five detentions before one day she cracked and I said Samantha , you and I have got to figure this out . It was only like October . I know some of you are thinking , yeah , school started in August . She's got her fourth or fifth detention by October and I was starting to think I don't know much more . I might have to start involving administration . She was on the borderline of defiant . Her talking had now gotten game-ish , if you will , and some of your educators have listened and said oh , I know that kid , I know . This time I said you got to help me , help me , help you . And she looked up from her book and she looked at me and said I'm trying to figure out why you care . Why do you care ? It's Spanish , miss Tooley , like I'm never going to use it again in my life . Why do you care whether I pass your class or not ? That's what I can't figure out . So you want to work on this relationship thing , you think ? Answer that question for me . And I sat there for a second . I knew why I cared , but I was teaching in a public school system , so I couldn't say what immediately came to my mind , which is because you're a child of God and you've been put in my classroom and it is my job to teach you . I couldn't say that you know and you've been put in my classroom and it is my job to teach you . I couldn't say that Separation of church and state , and I respected very clearly where my boundaries were . And I said can I ask you a question back ? And she said maybe . I said , well , let's just see where we go here . What makes you think I care ? And she said well , and she started rattling off five or six things that I did . You always call on me , you laugh with us , you compliment my outfit . Nobody's ever said anything about what I wear . If anything . I've been mooed at and called fat my whole life . And you told me one day I was beautiful . Do you remember that , ms Tooley ? I don't . And I said she rattled off four or five things like that , but she rattled them off with an edge . You know like I'm going to tell you this , but I'm still right , you don't care . Let me show you how much you don't care . And I said thank you for sharing that with me . Now let me tell you funny why I care . You , samantha , are my social security . It is your responsibility to graduate from high school , to get a job and to gainfully pay my Social Security . Someday I'm going to retire , I'm older than you are and I need you to be working . So I need you to get a high school diploma so you can get a decent job . I'd like for you to go out and get a college degree , but we'll talk about that later . That's why and it got her chuckling I did that on purpose , to loosen it . And I said because you're here , because in my room , samantha , I want you to learn more than Spanish . Spanish is what I paid to teach you , but I want you to learn how to respect people , and when you talk , when I'm talking , I experience it as disrespectful . It's disrespectful to me , and so I want to teach you about respect Because , long after Mrs Tooley is a distant memory a fond one , samantha , a fond one you're going to have to respect bosses and police officers and security people and all kinds of people in your life . And I want to teach you to respect . And you know what she said . She leaned back and said I never thought about it that way and no one's ever talked to me about respect . But that makes sense , miss Tooley , and I never had her in detention again . Now she talked . I'm not going to . She talked , but I would go , samantha , and she'd go . Respect Ms Tooley . That was it . That was it Now . Why do I tell you that story ? Because that's the trenches we live in , so I want you to look behind Samantha's story , which is the reality of where my educators are us educators are . We educators are every day . Of where my educators are us educators are we educators are every day . I had to teach a 17-year-old child what respect was because she was disrespected at her home and never taught to respect . And I know some of you are watching this thinking that's just not true . That's just not true . But I promise you , every single educator knows a hundred Samanthas . They know a hundred of them . The reality of the trenches are before I can teach my content , I have to teach them how to learn it . Before I can teach them how to do something difficult , I have to teach them how to think . Before I can teach them something pretty rote , easy , I have to teach them how to be respectful , how to listen , how to be collaborative . And I promise you , elementary , my elementary colleagues have it rougher than I do because they've taught those lessons way ahead of me . I promise you Samantha had heard those lessons in her elementary schools , but now it was a different situation . So I want to read you another piece from my book that says no one enters the teaching career for the money and no teacher , dare I say wonders of about an evening that they will invest their millions earned from being a teacher . Many teachers work outside of their profession to subsidize their pay or lack thereof . It's not uncommon to see a teacher , tutor , work at a local restaurant or work elsewhere just to make ends meet . In many states or districts , depending on the family size , the pay for a teacher is at , or very near the poverty level . That is not said . That is not said to spark a controversy about the debate of teachers or pay thereof . We could go on for hours about that , but rather to set the reality of this . Most teachers decorate their rooms on their dimes , they give supplies to their children on their

Teacher Sacrifices and Biblical Strength

Cathy Tooley 15:53

own expense and they will continue to do what they have to do for students to learn , because that's what it looks like in the trenches , that's what it looks like in the trenches . In the trenches , the reality is we will do whatever we have to do , which includes supplying their needs and meeting their emotional needs to get them educated . But that has a cost . When I have to spend time in my classroom , or I get to spend time in my classroom when there's been yet another school shooting and they're scared to talk them off of that ledge . There's 15 minutes that I didn't get to teach English and we'll talk at a later podcast . There's a chapter I wrote in my book called the Spinning Cracking Plates of Teachers and what we continue to put on teachers' plates . But today's not that episode . Today's episode is really about clarity . Clarity that what we are asking and what it looks like in the trenches , is that teachers are the hardest working people out there . They are being required to be social workers when they never went to school to get that . They are being required to be food service personnel when they never and don't have schooling to do that . They are being required to be disciplinarians and , in many places , step in parents when many of them are not parents and chose to not be parents . They are being expected to love , to nurture , to raise children . I say all of this because I don't want to leave this episode in a downer . So I want to leave you with a verse that I it is the only way that I'm telling you teachers are getting it through . It's Philippians 4.13 . Many of you know exactly who this is . I can do all things . Through Christ , who strengthens me , I can do all things . So I want to talk for just the last minute or two that I have today , and that's to those of you in the trenches . I want you to look in this camera right now and I want you to know there's someone who sees you , who hears you , who feels you , who is you , and I want you to know that , while so many people will never understand so many of us do , you are not alone . What you're doing is not alone , and the rewards for you in heaven are greater than any rewards here on this earth . So while you're at Walmart later today

Final Encouragement for Educators

Cathy Tooley 18:30

buying yet another series of binders for that child who never seems to have a binder , or while you just listen to a painful Samantha story and think , well , I don't know , my heart can burden this I want you to pull Philippians out and remember that , that you can do all things through Christ , who strengthens you . You are in a called field that most people never get the gift for , so keep this episode for those days when you think I don't know if I was meant to do this . Oh , you do . I wasn't meant to do a podcast . Yet here we are sitting , you're watching this and I know I just felt it . When I just said those words , someone heard those words and that's why I'm sitting here at this podcast . So you brush off those shoes , you brighten up that lipstick , you put on that suit and you go back in tomorrow and make a difference , just like you do every other day and from one educator to another . Thank you from the bottom of my heart . See you next time .