ABCs of Parenting Adult Children

Caregivers & Importance of Self Care with Lynette Weldon

James C Moffitt Jr. Season 1 Episode 35

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Lynette talks about being a caregiver and how important it is to practice self care. We discuss marriage and family dynamics. We discuss the importance of extended grace to yourself as you transition into being a caregiver.

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Richard Jones. I am an RN with over 34 years of Nursing Experience, much of that experience working with young adults in the corrections system. 

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James Moffitt (00:03.224)
Hello and welcome to ABC's of Parenting Adult Children. My name is James Moffitt and I'll be your host. Today is Monday, January the 13th, 2025. Our guest speaker is Lynette Weldon, who is joining us today on our podcast episode. Hello Lynette, how are you doing? I'm doing great. Thanks for having me, James. Yeah, absolutely. So go ahead and tell the listening audience who you are and where you're from and what's going on.

Sure. Well, my name is Lynette Weldon and I'm from Wisconsin. So it's kind of cold here today. I think it's like minus seven. Oh no. Yikes. Yeah. Yeah. It's cold. I have been a parent for 41 years now. So 41 years of parenting. I don't think it ever ends, even though they're adults. Right. And when

My third child was born, I was really excited because my two oldest are boys and my third, I knew I was gonna have a girl. And so I was very excited to have a girl. And when she was born a few hours later, the doctor came in and said,

You know, I think we need to, think she may have Down syndrome. And I will never forget that moment because, you know, your whole reality changes. You know, my whole reality just kind of changed on a dime. And that is when I began my journey as an actual caregiver, not just a mother, but a caregiver, because things are a little bit different when you have a child with a disability.

And there's been a ton of challenges and a ton of blessings throughout the whole course of her life. She's 35 now and I'm still her primary caregiver. But that started the journey for me on becoming a caregiver coach. you know, fast forward years later and I started recognizing that

James Moffitt (02:20.344)
there were a lot of parents out there that needed support who were feeling overwhelmed and not just with kids with a disability, but just parents in general, you know, and a lot of moms just feeling really burnt out and overwhelmed with everything they had on their plate. And so I started a coaching program for that reason to help them get through those things and

to recognize that their life doesn't have to stay in that burnout zone.

So, you said your daughter had down syndrome. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know anything about that, but I've heard of it. what,

To what degree is, when you talk about caregiving, to what degree is your, I mean, what level of care do you have to,

James Moffitt (03:25.378)
I don't know the words.

James Moffitt (03:31.052)
Like how much care does she need or? Yeah. Yeah. That's it. Sorry. Yeah. Yeah. That's what I was looking at. was the disability was going through my head and I was like, how do I approach this? Yeah. well, you know, Down syndrome is an extra chromosome and the, you know, it ranges from severely disabled to moderate mild. she's probably between.

I would say she's about moderate when it comes to that. But not only with the Down syndrome, she was diagnosed with diabetes when she was eight months old. just, you know, probably two months after she was born, they said that she had a hole in her heart. And so there were multiple things that we were dealing with. So, you know, that's the disability that she has. Right. And she probably, you know,

You know, they say, you know, to expect a learning cap. And I have not seen that with my daughter, but I think I had a different attitude. You know, I was going to try to give her the best life possible to help her become the best person that she could be. And so I was always advocating for her all the time. Right. So the medical professionals came to you and said, you know, this is, this is, this is the,

peak of her understanding or the peak of her knowledge or her development in other words they told you her development was going to be stunted or or only get to a certain level okay yes so so so was there was there like a communications issue yeah you know her speech wasn't really very good and one of the traits of kids who have down syndrome

is that they have a wider tongue and it's harder for them to pronounce words, right? Yeah, I remember in second grade, she was in second grade in special ed and had a speech pathologist that worked with her. And they said, know, we're gonna start to teach her sign language and give her a book of photos that she can show to people so she can communicate.

James Moffitt (05:58.708)
I said, no, that's not okay. You know, you, I want you to continue to try to improve her speech. We're not just going to say, okay, you know, we give up and, she speaks very well to this day and can get her point across very well when she wants to and strangers can understand her. I believed what they said and not advocated for her. We wouldn't be where we are today. You know,

And I thought that that just comes along with parenting. You know, we do that with all our kids, I think, you know, we advocate for their wellbeing and for the best situation for them. So interestingly enough, my wife is a special ed teacher and she's a resource teacher at the present. And so she, she zeros in our targets, learning and disabilities and

and issues or places where children are lacking, like if they need help with math or need help with reading or they need help with, I don't think she does anything really with speech, but the, you know, the, the core curriculum stuff that, that they are expected to follow. having, listening to your story, that reminds me of my sister and I were adopted in Germany. My dad was in the military.

stationed in Frankfurt, Germany, way back in the early 60s. I was born in 61, so it was probably about 62 or 63 when he was there. He met my mother, who was in Austria. The met at a bingo game, got married, tried to have kids. That didn't work. And so they said, hey, let's adopt a couple of German kids at this orphanage. They only wanted to adopt my sister. They were looking for a little girl, so they adopted her. And I guess it took like a year for the...

paperwork to go through and they went to the orphanage and for the nuns to sign off on the paperwork and get my sister Tanya and the nun said, we're not supposed to tell you this, but she has a blood brother over there in that crib. And so my dad walked over to the crib and picked me up and he had one of those Austrian Derby hats or whatever they used to wear. And he said, I took the hat off of his head and threw it across the room and laughed at him. And so he just, he...

James Moffitt (08:22.572)
I guess that he fell in love with me at that point. so they adopted me and my sister was like two and I was one. My sister couldn't see out of one eye. I had a have had a club foot all my life and the German doctors told my parents that I would never walk and I had a cast on my foot when they got me. And so due to his military career, you know, he had

good health insurance and medical care. And so we got, got taken care of. And my parents told me that, you know, once I got to the age where I could understand what they were talking about, they told me that said, yeah, the German doctor said you would never walk. And we just said, that's not, that's not correct. And so they said they would, they'd throw a toy or something across the floor and I would pitch a fit because I wanted them to go get it for me, you know, and they, they forced me to crawl and go get the toys myself.

and progressively taught me how to walk. And so I'm very thankful to this day had they just said, okay, well, you're just not going to be able to walk for the rest of your life and put me on crutches or in a wheelchair or something. so I'm very, very thankful that they were tenacious and that they, like you said, they advocated for me and they recognized the value in my being able to walk.

And I wound up playing basketball for six years in junior high school and high school. And I never ran track, but I used to run 10 miles a day and lift weights. And when I was a young kid and, so I'm, you know, I'm so thankful that they, they, they didn't, they didn't just give up. Right. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm sure, I'm sure that we have a story. Yeah. I'm sure we have a lot of parents out there listening that.

Maybe in the same shoes, may have, you know, varying, you know, some of their kids may have a varying degree of disability, you know, and it could be very, very, very minor, or it could be, you know, you know, somebody with like ADHD or I'm not a, I'm not an educator and I don't know. I wish if my wife was on this podcast, she could talk in depth to all of this. But, you know, I, I know that we had four children.

James Moffitt (10:50.508)
And luckily, none of them had a disability. We had a daughter that had cancer that passed away in 2001. So guess cancer counts as a disability, right?

So, think one thing that parents should really know is that just because they are the so-called expert doesn't mean they're always right. And we need to question and challenge, especially when it comes to our kids. Right.

Well, we, uh, we wound up being caregivers with our daughter, Jessica, for, uh, 14 months. And, uh, uh, she went to M U S M U S C children's hospital here in Charleston, and they had to take a tumor out of her head. And part of it was wrapped around her brainstem. So they told us that the surgeons told us that if she lived 12 months, we'd be lucky. They gave her zero hope. And of course we fought that the best that we could, you know, and, she had a lot of.

medical professionals taking care of her and she lasted 14 months. So I'm very familiar with all the extra stuff that you have to do when you have a sick child and all. Yeah, I'm really sorry for your loss. Yeah, it was tough. I don't wish that on my worst enemy. So she was a sweet child.

She was probably the kindest, gentlest, sweetest child of the four that we had. so, she'll always be special to us. so I'm looking at some of these questions. So let's talk about managing holiday stress and expectations.

James Moffitt (12:43.966)
yeah, we just went through the holiday season. Yeah. I just think that, you the best thing to do is just be honest with people, you know, with what you can and can't do, especially when you have kids or, you know, when you're a caregiver with somebody who has a disability, you can't always do everything. And I think we have a hard time with it.

I know that especially women do, know, we want to please everybody and be there for everybody and make everybody happy. And sometimes it's hard for us to say no. And then you add all the stress of the holidays onto that. And it's like, whoa, now my plate is really full. And it's just, think the best way to manage it is just learning what you can and can't handle. Being honest about it and, you know, saying no and setting some boundaries around it.

Which is really hard. Boundaries are a hard thing for most people. Yup. Boundaries, carry, self care and boundaries are two reoccurring themes on this podcast. So you want to, you want to talk a little bit about boundaries and, and, how, how they're difficult to set.

Yeah. Well, know, boundaries and self care kind of go hand in hand. You don't have time for self care unless you protect your energy and you make space and time for you and yourself here. And so, you know, learning to say no and setting boundaries can be really hard in the beginning. And I think it really has a lot to do with how you think about it, what your belief system is around that. You know, I know a lot of the women

in my caregiver course, when they first start, they feel like, you know, saying no, and implementing self care in their life is selfish. And so it's changing that mindset that, you know, it's not selfish, it's a necessity. Right. That in turn, then enables them to take a look at, okay, maybe it is okay if I say no, you know,

James Moffitt (14:59.286)
Maybe it is okay if I set up some boundaries and protect some of my time and some of my space so that I have time for me to replenish and fill back up. And then I also think that there's a way you can do it that doesn't make you feel bad about saying no. It's just how you say it. Like James, if you said, can you do this for me next week instead of saying no.

you could very easily say, well, thanks for thinking of me or thanks for asking me. I just really can't right now, ask me again. Or there's certain ways to say no without and still feel good about saying no. But you don't have to be in your face. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. But if you don't have boundaries, then you have zero time for yourself.

and you're always giving to everybody else. You can't sustain your life like that. I like how you talked about how you need to fill yourself back up. You need to have some me time. You need to have some downtime. need to find hobbies or some people meditate. Some people read their Bible. Some people read books. Some people like to listen to music.

You know, and one of the things that we learned when we walked, went through the journey with Jessica was that it's important that parents have a date from time to time, like once a month, you you just get a caregiver to come over that you trust and go out and spend an hour and a half, two hours eating dinner, going to a movie, walking down the beach, doing something to

to focus on one another, because you get so focused on your child that sometimes you forget that it takes a lot out of you. Caregiving takes a lot out of you. It sucks the energy out of you. Sometimes it's a soul sucking endeavor. Sometimes it can be thankless. You just give so much.

James Moffitt (17:17.773)
In the case of your children, it's not necessarily thankless because you're doing, you have a purpose and you're doing it for a reason, right? And while the person that's disabled may not know how to reciprocate or express themselves in a way to let you know, hey, I love you, or hey, I appreciate what you're doing. I think they really do. They probably do feel that way. They just don't know how to communicate it that well. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, and I think if caregivers looked at it that way, if they

could recognize and understand that taking care of themselves first allows them to take care of the person they're caring for. And the person that they're caring for loves them just as much as you love the person you're caring for. And they want you to be happy and healthy. And you brought up another thing too that happens a lot in relationships surrounding caregiving is that

you know, if you don't take the time to fill back up and take those little moments that you need, you're completely depleted and have nothing left to give your partner. Right. And it's really important. And I don't think that it's talked about enough, but it affects a marriage or a relationship when your sole focus is caring for that person. And, you know, you need to take that time.

And it needs to be like an appointment, really. know? I mean, if we have an appointment to get our car fixed, we don't just blow it off and say, well, you know, maybe next week. And I think we need to really look at that in the same way.

Right, so looking at a marriage relationship, I'm going to step out on a limb here and say that I would guess that the moms and the women are typically the primary caregiver. I'm sure that's not 100%. I don't want to get caught in the trap of painting with a too broad of a stroke of a brush. You know what I'm saying? I mean, I know there's a lot of guys out there.

James Moffitt (19:29.196)
husbands and fathers that want to help probably, but maybe they're not geared. not like, the moms are more nurturing, right? The moms are more, I think they're more in tune with that caregiving role than the fathers are. And again, I would say that the fathers, it's not that the fathers don't care.

It doesn't mean that the fathers aren't in tune with what's going on in the household or with the child. But maybe they feel a little bit helpless. I'll give you for instance, it's like the people at our church when our daughter was going through cancer, they were real great with hugging her and talking to her. She would show up at church in the wheelchair before service. And they loved her while she was in their presence.

But when she was out of sight, was like out of sight, out of mind, and they didn't make any phone calls. They didn't come over. They didn't do anything. And we found out afterwards that people really don't know what to say. They don't know what to say. And if they've never had a child with cancer or a loved one with cancer, going through radiation, going through chemo, going through all the white, you know, the

bone marrow transplants, all the stuff that they do to try to save the child, you know, if they haven't been through that, then they don't really know what to do or what to say. And I would imagine some dads out there are probably a little bit like that in that, that, you know, they, they, they want to help, but they really don't know what to do. And maybe, maybe they're embarrassed to ask the caregiver, Hey, how can I help you today? What can I take off your plate? Right.

And so I think in this parents, I think in the marriage relationship, it's important that both the man and woman, husband and wife, take the time to be sensitive to one another's needs. Right. And if the, you know, if the, if the, wife is the primary caregiver, then the husband should communicate, his desire to help.

James Moffitt (21:55.155)
and ask for direction and say, hey, today, what would you like for me to do? What can I do to give you a break? And on the flip side of that, probably the wife or the mother or the caregiver will say that the role is reversed and the man is the primary caregiver. Maybe he's a stay at home dad and mom's the one going out into the world and making the bacon. And so

So if that script was flipped like that, then he would have to pull his wife into that situation and say, hey, I've been doing this all day. Can you give me an hour's worth of breaks so can go out and walk the dog or clear my head? so I think it's real important that parents communicate closely with one another and be in tune with what's going on.

Yeah, absolutely. And you're right. The majority is women. to add to that too, James, I think that when you are the caregiver, you need to learn how to advocate for yourself also. let's say if my husband came home and I had a really bad day, I need to also be able to say to him, hey, I really need a break. So I think it goes both ways.

You know, I think also it has a lot to do with society, you know, especially when you're in your 50s and your 60s, you're raised where, you know, men go out and, you know, they make the money and women are taught more to be the nurturer, you know, to be right, right. The emotions and things like that. And I think men were taught, you know, this is what you do to take care of your family, your work, you know, You know,

And so, but things have changed so much and yeah, it's just both ends need to communicate in order to really be a team. Right. I think it's really important. So another question I see here is finding your purpose and identity outside of your role as a caregiver. Yeah.

James Moffitt (24:22.295)
Yep, I think that when you are a caregiver, you end up being really isolated for a number of reasons. You know, especially in the beginning, because typically, you know, you're thrown into that role. If you're a caregiver, maybe, you know, your child was born with a disability or your husband had a stroke or you know, you're thrown into that. Right. In the beginning, you just get really busy taking care of what needs to be done.

and you're always saying no to things or not being able to do the things that you used to do. And so you end up feeling really isolated and alone. And I think that it can even happen with moms, stay at home moms, forget who they were before they became a mom. And I think finding your purpose, especially when you're in that situation where you're overwhelmed and you might be suffering from depression

and things like that and feeling isolated. I think it's really important for them to go back and take a look at, okay, who was I before this started? And what did I used to like to do? And what made me happy? what gave me energy? And implementing some of those things back in your life again. And it doesn't mean just little things, just maybe even a half an hour a day doing something that

you know, used to give you happiness and just remembering who you are besides just the caregiver. Right. We get we get so wrapped up into the in the parenting role. You know, we we fall in love, we get married or we don't get married. We stay together. Right. It's like you said, society has changed a whole lot since the 60s, 70s and 80s. And so so, yeah, you

bring children into the world and all of a sudden the romance is not as hot as it used to be. You've got all these flipping responsibilities. It's like a full-time job. It can be tough.

James Moffitt (26:48.225)
So,

Let's talk about, like you said, you said you were, you're kind of thrown into that role. You're not, don't get into it gradually. It's like it all of a sudden it's in your face and you're like, great. I have this to deal with. Right. And, so, so is this really my life and accepting your new normal? That's the, you know, you know, people are, especially moms, the caregivers are going, why me God? Why?

Why is, why is this all of sudden my burden, right? So talk about, that, that transition from norm normal, right? You're normal into a new normal. Yeah. that's that there's lots of layers to that one. first off, I think one thing that is not ever.

really talked about or even recognized, and I'm sure you can probably relate to this, James, is that in the beginning, when you're thrown into this, there's some grieving and some mourning that happens. And because your life has changed so drastically, it doesn't look like it used to, right? Right. Right. You know, so you have that aspect of it and just

you know, really being okay with because we're not, you know, when you're thrown into this, you have a grieving process that you're going through and it's, you know, you're afraid of being judged, right? How dare you feel sorry for yourself? Look, what's happening with your child or with your spouse, your parent or whatever. but there's still there, you know, there's still grieving that goes on. And so I think that just recognizing that it's okay to feel that way.

James Moffitt (28:46.517)
and that you shouldn't be ashamed and there's nothing wrong. It's a valid emotion that we have and working through that is really important. then understanding that, okay, so your life has really changed right now, but that doesn't mean that it has to be a life sentence. You learn how to find things within your situation that are still good.

you can have a normal, but it might not be what it used to look like, right? That's another part of it. And then really letting go of things you can't control, which can be really hard in situations. yeah, so like I said, that's kind of like multi-layered.

Yeah, we got plenty of time. So I was thinking as you were speaking, I was thinking about there's different types of grief. The first type of grief is your normal has changed to abnormal and you're learning how to transition into that new role. You're not only the mom and the wife, but now you're the caregiver and you can't really say no.

You know, you love your child and you want to be the advocate for the child and you want the best for your child. So you're going to do your dead level best to give them the care that you can possibly give them and get them the best possible care that you can give them, right? Or get for them. so in doing all of that, it takes a lot of energy, takes a lot of emotions. And so you have to that

That type of grief is where you're letting go of your normal. You're letting go of your routine. We all have our routines that we like to kind of stick to. It gives us the normal we're used to. letting go of that normal is part of a grief process that you have to let go. So yeah. What other layers of that onion can we peel?

James Moffitt (31:13.847)
How about just, just, you know, accepting that, you know, it's okay for you to feel that way. And, you know, I think a lot of people try to hide how they're really truly feeling, because they're so afraid that people are going to look at them and judge them or think, you know, like if we ask for help, a lot of times we don't ask for help, because then we think

people are gonna think we're not doing a good enough job or we're not doing enough or you know what I mean? And a lot of that just comes down to your belief system around that whole thing and why do you feel that way? is it really true? And you know what I mean? Just starting to ask yourself different questions about that.

situation and you know, like a lot of people think self care is selfish and that you know, you should be putting all your energy into the person that you're caring for. And you know, when I hear that it goes back to what they tell you on an airplane every time you're on an airplane. When that oxygen mass drops, you don't put it on the person next to you, you put it on yourself first.

Because if you don't take care of you, you can't help the person next to you. so, you know, so where do we get that, you know, self-care is selfish? Who told us that? You know, that might be a question we want to ask, you know, and is that really true? And, you know, I think a lot of times when people think about self-care, they think about, you know,

the whole day at the spa or, you know, an expensive weekend or, it doesn't have, it doesn't even have to be anything like that. can just be 10 minutes here, 10 minutes there, know, clearing your mind, going for a walk, you know, those kinds of things are self care also. think as parents, we, whether it's a, whether it's a dealing with a child with a disability or a spouse that had a stroke or a heart attack or whatever, I think

James Moffitt (33:32.073)
I think as individuals, as caring people ourselves, I think that we get so embroiled and wrapped up in all of the different tasks and emotions and situations surrounding us that it's easy for us to forget to take care of ourselves. And that's where we need a support system.

you part of self-care is finding a support system. Like, there's nothing shameful about finding a support group. There's support groups from A to Z, right? And churches are a great source of support groups. They have grief support, they have marriage support, they have, you know, divorce support, they have all manner of support groups. And so, you know, maybe that's one thing that we should encourage parents to do is if you're...

inability to figure out how to find moments of time to do some things that give you pleasure and are fun for you, then maybe there's nothing wrong with going to see a therapist if you need to. Talk to your best friend, get on the phone, get on Facebook and private message somebody that's a friend of yours and say,

My day really sucks today, you know, how's your day going and just, just listening to people talk and having people talk to you is, very therapeutic and, for sure. Yeah. That's, you know, the group sessions that I do with the caregivers, I think is the most impactful because they're coming together with other people that understand how they feel.

It's a safe place to be honest. And, you know, they're giving each other hope, you know, one might be in a really bad place that day and somebody else might share what, you know, a win or a celebration or something that went well for them. And it gives them hope in that, know, well, you know, if they can do it, I can do it. And I just think groups and having support like that are key. And, you know, also to stay accountable, you know,

James Moffitt (35:58.325)
Like on those days or weeks where you think, well, I'll do it tomorrow. You know, if you're in a group, you're going to be called out. You know, you're going to be held accountable. Yeah.

One of the things that ran through my head as I was listening to you talk was I think that there's maybe there's a certain amount of, one of the things that keeps caregivers from reaching out and asking for help is maybe because the caregiver.

James Moffitt (01:13:39.351)
And that just when somebody says that to you, it kind of takes your breath away. And, know, you don't really know how to respond or, you know, so, so I think we're afraid as caregivers, caregivers, we're afraid to give people that opportunity to assault us like that. Right. Yep. For sure. It's kind of like the elephant in the room. Yeah. It holds them back a lot from really sharing and being honest with people for fear of being judged.

Right. Absolutely. Like they're not doing enough or they're, they're not, and it starts to, it really starts to affect their self-worth, you know, and they start feeling like maybe I'm not doing enough. Maybe I'm not good enough. Maybe I need to do more. And it just, you know, the whole thing can just be a vicious cycle. Right. Well, and I think we have to looking from the inside out.

I think we need to realize that the people on the outside of our world, they don't understand what the reality is. They have no clue what's going on behind those closed doors. They have no clue what you're walking through or what you're doing or what you're enduring. so knowing that, we can filter some of the stupid comments that come at us through the filter of, you don't really know what the hell you're talking about.

You know, we don't, may not, we may not say that to them in that way, but that's the filter we need to have engaged so that, so that it doesn't affect us in a bad way. Right. We don't, so we, we can't internalize the vicious or thoughtless crap that some people say in the, at the wrong time. Right. Right. Exactly. Exactly. I think it's harder though, when you're exhausted, much easier when you're, you know,

when you feel

James Moffitt (01:55:33.473)
listen to some music, pray, meditate. had somebody on the podcast the other day told me that they chant and I was like, oh, okay. And I was cool with it. And was like, was thinking, well, what do you mean you chant? And so I asked her, said, are you talking about positive affirmations? And she was and she was just rattled off this Buddhist blah, blah, whatever it was.

a type of Buddhist religion or whatever and she says there's a mantra that she chants every day and hey if that works for you do it absolutely you know I am at you know whatever whatever works for you and it gives you the peace of mind that you need to to carry on and and take care of yourself and your loved ones and that's that's great for sure yeah do whatever you can because it builds resilience too

You know, because sooner or later she's going to hit fan and you better have a reserve, you know, right? yeah. Yeah. It's like I said, it's a parenting is a challenge and, you said you've been parenting for 41 years. Yeah. That's a long time. Yeah. My oldest just turned 41. is, it is very challenging, rewarding.

Yeah.

Yeah, parenting is probably one the toughest jobs on the planet.

James Moffitt (01:57:10.036)
Yeah. But you can, it's, has its directions. No, no, you don't, you don't get a manual on that baby comes out. You're like, here's, here's your baby and here's it's here's its manual. And you're like, no, go home. Good luck. Yeah. I remember a lot of those days and, I'm so thankful that I've

James Moffitt (02:40:05.504)
episode, you can listen to this podcast on Spotify, Amazon Music, iHeartRadio, Apple podcasts, and public radio. If you want to watch the video version of this podcast episode, you need to go to Spotify. You download the app onto your smartphone or tablet, and then you can see us looking at one another and looking at you and having these conversations. All the rest of the podcast hosts, you're just going to get audio, which is what you can listen to in your car, obviously.

on Spotify, you can find the URL for our podcast website and on the podcast websites where I leave all the information about all these episodes and, and, I've got a schedule of all the release dates for all the different podcast episodes coming up. You can find my contact information and click on my email address and write me a message, which I would love to get a message from you. I already talked about the show schedule.

There's also a place for reviews. So if you'll do me a favor, when you go to the review section, if you listen to some podcast episodes and you like something or you think there needs to be more said, or you have, you know, wants or desires as to some content for, for, uh, podcast episodes coming up, just let me know, because this podcast is for you. It's not for me. We are, we're, I'm doing this for you, for you guys. All right. So.

I'm just going say thanks for listening. Thanks for the privilege of your time. Have a blessed day. Lynette, thank you so much for being here. yeah, thanks for having me.