Episode 37 - Addiction Starts Early: What Kava Is Doing to Our Children.

In this episode, we unpack what addiction really is, what leads to it, and why early exposure to substances matters more than people think. From brain development to environment and culture, we break down how habits are formed and how they can shape a person’s future.

We also confront a growing issue in our communities - young children being introduced to kava. Is kava really a “better alternative” to alcohol?

This episode challenges the normalisation of substance use among youth and asks the hard questions:

•  What are we teaching our children? 
•  Are we protecting them or failing them? 
•  And what happens when culture is used to justify harmful behaviour?

I also share real testimonials from wives of faikava men, revealing how kava has impacted their lives, families, and futures.

This is not just a conversation. This is a wake-up call.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:07

And hello everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Pacific Empowerment Podcast with your host Akaneskao Fusi. Today's episode is one that every parent, every community leader, and every young person needs to hear. We're talking about addiction. What is addiction? What actually leads to addiction, and most importantly, what happens when children and young men are exposed to substances like kava at a very young age. Because here's the truth. Addiction doesn't just appear one day. It starts somewhere. And for many people, it starts early. Before we dive in, I want to talk about a video I saw online of a fight gava in a church where very young kids were drinking kava. This was an Easter camp where they were supposed to be talking about cheeses, yet they chose to introduce kava, a drug, to young children. And why am I talking about it? Because this can affect their brains, especially because their brains are still developing. Anyway, I posted the video and the families and church members of those children started attacking me hard on social media because I didn't blur the children's faces. But the video was already posted online and other pages shared it without blurring their faces too, so why are they only attacking me and not the others? Well, I know why. Because I called them out for giving cover to the kids. Here's the video. I blurred the children's faces here on my podcast, but I won't delete the video on social media because we are exposing this toxic culture in the Pacific where young kids are allowed to drink cover. This is not blaming the kids, no. It's you adults and church people who allowed these kids to drink cover for fun. That is the whole point of the video. I mean, would you allow them to try alcohol and ice as well as meth and marijuana and other drugs? Because that's what you did. That's what you did with cover. Okay, let's watch the video. Um, you know, I couldn't believe it when I saw the videos that um this so-called church members, you know, are making fun, you know, thinking it's fun to give kids kava and teach them how to drink kava. And in the video, they say teach them young. See, this is the kind of toxic culture I'm talking about. In one of my previous episodes, I read a comment from a teacher in Fiji who shared that primary and high school students drink kava and then come to school and sleep, unable to focus on their studies. This can be linked to the effects of cover on the mind, which may cause apathy and a lack of motivation to study or pursue goals in life. That's why we're fighting to regulate cover, just like alcohol. So, this week I've been a bit moody because of the attacks and from families and church members. They were so focused on the video trying to deflect from what they actually did wrong. I mean, the reason why I posted it was because of the edits encouraging the kids to drink cover. It wasn't about the kids. And I had to respond because things were getting out of hand. I mean, these men clearly haven't learned from the long battle I've had with Fai Ga men on social media since last year. And yet they still decided to try me. So I met a post and said, if you are so angry about this video, why aren't you also angry about the sexual abuse happening in Fai Gava? And I challenged them. I told all those men coming at me to go and make a post showing the same level of anger about that. And what happened. Dead silent. Didn't hear from any response. Except swearing. I think from one person. I was waiting, waiting, waiting, but no one said anything, you know? Because they were more angry about being exposed than about the actual issues we're fighting. And many of these men haven't even listened to my full episodes to educate themselves on what I've been speaking about, especially the sexual abuse. Yet they jump into the comments asking questions and attacking without even taking the time to learn and understand what I've been preaching from day one. You know, I was so angry. And it actually reminded me of something I watched over Easter. I watched this show called The Chosen about Jesus. And there's a scene where Jesus Christ goes into the temple and sees people turning it into a marketplace, you know, buying, selling, and making money in a place that was meant for worship. And what does he do? He gets angry, he drives them out, and he flips their tables. Let's watch the video together. Now, this is important. This moment in the video shows what we call righteous anger. Righteous anger is not about ego, it's not about pride, it's not about losing control. It's anger that comes from seeing injustice, wrongdoing, corruption, especially in places that are meant to be sacred, safe, and right. It's anger that says, this is wrong and it needs to stop. Even Jesus Christ showed anger when people were exploiting others, money was placed above God and sacred spaces were being misused. Now, let's compare that to what's happening in the church in Fai Gava today. We have Fai Gava happening in church halls, getting drunk and talking dirty, money being raised for church using doa which leads to sexual abuse and broken marriages, behavior that many testimonies have already exposed. And I ask you this. Do you think Jesus would approve of this behavior or this so-called culture? Or would he walk in the church halls and flip those cover bowls upside down, just like what we saw here in the video? Because when you really think about it, it's very similar. A place meant for worship, community, and holiness is now being used for money, exploitation, social status, and questionable behavior. This is not hate. This is not attacking culture. This is what happens when you care enough to confront what's wrong in our society. If you can be angry at exposure, but not angry at injustice, then you've already chosen what side you're on. Anyway, let's dive deeper into cover addiction and how early exposure can affect people later in life. What is addiction, you may ask? Addiction is not just liking something. It's not just having a habit. According to National Institute on Drug Abuse, addiction is compulsive use of a substance despite harmful consequences. That means you keep using it even when it's hurting your health, hurting your family, affecting your finances, destroying your responsibilities. And you feel like you can't stop. So this is how addiction works. Your brain has a reward system. When you do something pleasurable, your brain releases dopamine. Dopamine is what makes you feel good. But when you use substances like drugs and you know kava, it can artificially trigger that system. So what does that mean? It means that your brain has a natural reward system. It's designed by God to make you feel good when you do healthy things like eating, bonding with people, achieving something, exercising. When you do these things, your brain releases dopamine, the feel-good chemical. Now here is the difference. Natural trigger. When you work hard, you feel proud. When you eat, you feel satisfied. And when you connect, you feel happy. But the feeling is earned and balanced. Compared to artificial trigger, alcohol and drugs and other psychoactive substances like kava can force your brain to release dopamine quickly and strongly without you doing anything meaningful to earn it. So artificially triggering the system means the substance is basically pressing the brain's feel-good button for you without real effort or real reward. So you'll feel good without doing any work. And why is this dangerous? Because your brain starts to learn this is the easiest way to feel good. So over time, your brain starts depending on it. You need more to feel the same effect. You lose control, and that's when it becomes addiction. So instead of earning happiness, the substance shortcuts it, and that shortcut can turn into dependence. Now, let's talk about why young people are more at risk. This is where it gets serious, because young people are not just small adults, their brains are still developing. Research from National Institute on Drug Abuse shows that the brain areas responsible for decision making and self-control are still developing during adolescence. Adolescence is roughly between ages 10 to 19. But the reward system develops earlier. So what does that mean? It means that young people feel rewards strongly but don't yet have full control or judgment. And that combination is very high risk for children. What research shows that the earlier someone starts using substances is the higher their risk of developing substance problems later in life. A major study called H at First Use and Later Substance Use Disorder found that early use is linked to more symptoms of addiction later on, even when accounting for other factors. So to sum it up, when you introduce a substance to a developing brain, a child, you're not just giving them a moment. You are shaping their future relationship with that substance. When you give child a cover, you're not just giving them a drink. You are teaching their brain that this is normal, and that's how bad habits start. A young brain is still learning. So when kids drink cover, their brain learns early that this is normal, this is okay, and this is part of life. And that is how addiction begins. And what leads to addiction? Addiction is not random, it comes from a combination of factors. Let's break it down into four. Number one, early exposure. This is one of the strongest predictors of addiction. If a child grows up seeing drinking, drug use, govern use as normal, they are more likely to try it earlier, accept it, repeat it. Number two, environment and normalization. According to Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, risk increases when substance use is normalized, adults model the behavior, there are no clear boundaries. And number three is trauma and stress. Research from Centers for Disease Control and Prevention shows that adverse childhood experiences like abuse, neglect, and stable homes are strongly linked to higher risk of substance use later on in life. And number four is peer influence. Young people want belonging, they want acceptance. So if their circles uses substances, they are more likely to join in. Just like what we saw in the Fight Cover video I just showed you earlier with the kids drinking cover. There's a common argument we hear all the time that cover is better than alcohol. At least it keeps young people off the streets, they say. And you know, I understand where that's coming from. Alcohol has caused a lot of damage, violence, accidents, broken families. So people look at cover and think, this is the safer option. But here's the real question. Is replacing one substance with another actually solving the problem or just changing the form of it? If a young person needs a substance to relax, needs a substance to socialize, needs a substance to escape, then the issue is not just alcohol. The issue is dependence on a substance. And the addiction cycle continues. When you replace one substance with another, but the mindset stays the same, the cycle doesn't end. It just continues in a different form. Yes, cover may be less harmful than alcohol in some ways, but less harmful does not mean harmless. And more importantly, it still teaches young people that you need something external to cope, relax, or belong. So different substance, same damage. And let's be real about something. Even if people say kava is better than alcohol, addiction is addiction. There is no difference. Because whether it's kava or alcohol or drugs or eyes, the impact can look very similar when it becomes a habit or dependence. We are talking about neglecting responsibilities, being absent from family, financial strain, loss of motivation and productivity, and strained relationships. Now, yes, I know cover and alcohol affect the body differently. They are not identical substances. But when it comes to lives and families, the pattern of addiction can lead to similar outcomes. Different substance, same cycle, same consequences. If we tell our young people, don't drink alcohol, drink cover instead. What are we really teaching them? You know, we are still teaching them reliance on substances, normalizing altered states, building habits around consumption, instead of teaching them discipline, self-control, and healthy coping mechanisms. So what is a better approach, you may ask? What is the solution? Well, what if instead of replacing alcohol with cover? We focused on building strong young men and women, teaching emotional control, teach them how to heal from their trauma, how to process their trauma, creating safe substance-free spaces for them to share and talk about their feelings, strengthening identity, purpose, and faith. So keeping youth off the streets is important, but keeping them dependent on substances is not the solution. True freedom is not choosing a better substance, it's not needing one at all. Let's say for example, what does a one cup of cover does? A young boy sits in a cover circle, you know, the adults laugh and say, it's just cover, it's harmless, he drinks, nothing happens immediately. Everyone normalizes it. He grows up thinking this is what men do. Fast forward two years later, he drinks cover regularly, it becomes part of his routine, then dependency builds. It didn't start with addiction, it started with exposure and normalization. Let's look at another example. What about family breakdown? I've shared testimonies already of wives saying husbands are always at fai cover, they're not present at home, you know, and even if they are at home, their minds are somewhere else. Their finances are affected, and children grow up seeing their pattern. And what happens? They think this is the normal way of living, and the cycle repeats. So addiction doesn't just affect individuals, it shapes families, generations, and entire communities. There is less direct research on cover addiction in children compared to alcohol or drugs. But here's what we do know. According to New South Wales Health, cover is not recommended for young people. Young people may experience stronger effects due to lower body weight. And studies in Pacific populations show youth do use cover even if daily use is lower. Another research in New Caledonia found associations between cover use and mental health concerns among youth. So even if research on cover-specific addiction is limited, the broader addiction science is clear. Early exposure to psychoactive substances increases future risk. So this is not just about cover. This is about what happens when we introduce substances to children and call it culture instead of questioning the consequences. Addiction doesn't start with someone being weak. It starts with exposure, environment, influence, and repetition. If we truly care about our children, we don't wait until they are addicted to act. We protect them before the habit forms. Addiction starts early, but so does prevention. And prevention doesn't just happen at home. It also happens through laws, boundaries, and accountability in our communities. So if we already know that early exposure to substances increases the risk of future addiction, then why are we not protecting our young people the same way across the board? Look at alcohol, look at cigarettes, look at other drugs. We don't just hope people use them responsibly, we regulate them. So the real question is, why should cover be treated differently when it's also a psychoactive substance? And that is what we're fighting for. We are fighting for basic protections, the same kind of protections already in place for alcohol and other substances. Not to destroy culture, but to protect people within our culture. So I have a few examples of regulations and suggestions of regulations that we can put in place in Tonga and you know other countries in regards to cover. Number one is age restrictions. No one under 18 should be allowed to consume cover, just like alcohol. Number two is licensed cover venues. Only approved places can serve cover, including community halls or church events, with rules and oversight. Number three is restricted operating hours. There should be no all night fight cover sessions. There should be a set closing times like bars and nightclubs. And number four, there should be no cover for minors in any setting, including homes, community halls, or church events. Number five, duty of care for host. Anyone hosting cover session is responsible for safety, behavior, and protecting women and young people and people that are involved in the fight cover. Number six is education and awareness. Clear public messaging on risks, mental health impacts, addiction awareness, no drunk driving. And number seven is consequences for violations, fines or penalties for serving minors, unsafe environments and exploitation. This is not about attacking culture. This is about protecting our people, because culture should never come together. Come at the cost of our children, our women and our families. If we regulate alcohol to protect the society, then we can regulate cover to protect our communities too. Addiction starts early, but so does prevention. And prevention starts when we stop normalizing harm and start setting boundaries. To end this episode, I will read some testimonials I received from wives of Fikeava men about how Gava affects their lives. And here are some of the testimony. This is a testimony from a wife of a Fikeava man. She said, Okay, so here it goes. I have been married for almost two years and my husband is Tongan. When we first got married, things were so good. He never used to go to Fike Gava only because we used to stay at our own house and he didn't want to leave me home alone. All the boys would ask him and he would always say no, and that made me happy. But me thinking I should let him go because I trust him, after all he's my husband. But we moved in with my parents a couple of months ago and that's where everything went wrong because Fai Gava is not far from our house. He now decides he wants to go all the time, Friday and Saturday. Ever since he's been going to Faigawa, he has changed a lot. He hides his phone, he's changed his password, he no longer pays attention to me and every little thing like that. I even brought how much I hate him going FaiGava. He replied to me saying, I don't understand anything about Fai Gava and it's in the Tongan culture. He also said to me that this is the only time he can hang out with his Tongan people and he can speak his language. But here's where I find it weird. These married men stay there until 5-6 in the morning. How is that me thinking they don't have any home to go or wives and children to go home to? I'm also carrying our kids and I hate it. I have to sleep alone and wait for him to come home in the morning. I don't understand how my husband was such a good man, never made me feel uncomfortable or have trust issues, but now I do. I need help, otherwise my marriage is going to end. That's the only way I could think of. Sorry, I forgot to say this, why a married man at Fai Government surrounding a single lady when they have wives at home who need them. No, I have not spoken to anyone about this, only you and my husband. We have argued every day and night about this. He just tells me that he loves me. Nothing is going to happen. I should trust him and let him be. I was a bit scared to reach out to you because I've been around the tonguins he hangs out with, and they are no good, and that's why I wanted to stay anonymous. And I don't blame her. If you see how I've been fighting the Fikeover men and women who support them, because I've been moody a lot lately when I'm fighting the Fike Governor men, you know, when they are mad that I'm exposing them, but this is what happens. This is the effect of cover. You know, it's just the same as alcohol and any other drugs because the husband and the father are absent from home. And the women suffers and the children suffers in the end. So the men only look out for their own interests and not the women and the children. How is that acceptable in a Christian community? Okay, I have another testimony. So this is a testimony of a wife who left her husband many times because of his addiction to Faikava. Hi Aganesi, please keep me in the shade. I'm very happy and proud of your courage to confront the cover drinkers. I chose to get married to a Mormon because I hated men who leave their wives at home and going out to drink cover. All of a sudden, my husband started going to Faicava to the point where he goes three or four times per week. And I've seriously thought about moving away from that area because I was so hurt by my husband going to drink cover all the time. The cover drinkers don't seem to understand their responsibilities to stay at home with their wives and families. They say it's their way to relax and be stress-free. Akanesi, many people from our church are involved in these cover gatherings because they couldn't drink beer or go to bars. So instead, they leave home to go drink cover and sit around and gossip like women. I personally know many marriages that have been broken down because of cover drinking and doa, especially within our church community. Educated people too. Anyway, even now, my husband has slowed down his cover drinking, but he still can't stop. Sometimes I leave the house with my young children because of the pain caused by his cover habits. He might change for a few weeks, then go back to it again. My suggestion is to make formal complaints to church leaders, especially in our church, so they don't just sit and gossip at cover while abandoning their families. If they don't go and play pickleball, they go fight cover and leave their wives and children at home. So the leaders know what is really happening in these cover spaces. I laugh when I read some of the comments, but the truth is many men are liars and manipulators who prioritize their own desires over their thinking. Maybe only about 10% of men actually think properly. Most of this behavior starts at home. How they were raised, seeing abuse in the household, and not being taught how to love their wives. Keep going with your battle. I ask those who are complaining to come forward, and those who committed abuse or wrongdoing should post them up so they feel embarrassed, and they can be dealt with quickly and reduce these terrible behaviors in Faigava spaces and stop their dirty ex. Please keep me anonymous. So if you see the patent, the first wife and the second wife, it's the similar patents. They feel abandoned because the husbands spend more time in Faigava than their wives. It's exactly like alcoholics and drug addicts. They spend more time getting drunk and getting high than spending with their family. So it's the same effect. It's the same impact. Um okay, last I will read out last testimony. I have so many testimony, but here are just few that I chose. So this is the last testimony from a wife of a Vikava man. I'm just sitting here reading the recent post about the church Tonga Tawaadaena and their church activities that seem to be happening all the time. I am married into the church Tongatawa Daena and I am honestly very shocked at what is happening before and after church. What they call prayer fellowship fai cava or after sermon fellowship. After church finishes, it turns into socializing and drinking kava. The biggest problem in my marriage and family is that 90% of my husband's life is in Fai Kava. If church starts at 10 a.m., he goes two to three hours earlier to drink kava, then attends church at 10, and when church finishes, he goes straight back to drinking kava again. He only finishes around 7 p.m. and then comes home. That is the big problem affecting my family is Fai Kava. When he goes to Faigawa, he comes home telling me the kinds of joking and inappropriate conversations that happen there, and the kinds of words those people use, even though they are church ministers currently. I always talk to my husband about the importance of family, but I know that our family always comes last. Kava always comes first. He always tells me he is going to the prayer fellowship Faikava before church. Then after church he just drinks kava, then comes home, eats and sleeps. What hurts me is seeing the damage kava is causing. What is the benefit of going to church if you first go and drink kava, get drunk or intoxicated, and only then go into the house of God? And this is what you call addiction. And what is the church doing about this? So the church is okay with husbands leaving their wives and children. This goes against the word of God. So the church needs to change this. The church needs to stop this cover addiction. So church ministers, so this is what they do. So many sinful behavior in the Kaaba gatherings. They talk dirty with the Do'a there or not, last towards the Doa, you know, addictions, you know, intoxicated. The Bible is warning us about drunkenness. They get drunk in Kaaba. See, he drinks Kaaba from morning until day night, leave their wives, abandon their children, and not fulfilling their father's responsibility. So why is the church still silent about this when you see you know Kaaba is causing so many problems in the Pacific, in our community, and the women are suffering, and somehow the church don't care about the feelings of women and children. They only care about the happiness of men. So if you're listening, you know, the church, you you need to do something about this. You need to fix this. Because, you know, this has been happening for generations, so many decades, of women, wives and children being abandoned at home while the men fulfill their fleshly desires in Fai Kava. You know, this is all the things that the Bible has warned us. And this is what you call addictions. So teaching young kids at a young age to drink cover, this is bound to happen. It will the consequences will fall on the wives and children and their life as well, and even their soul. Because those who get drunk on in cover all the time get intoxicated. The Bible is clear on drunkenness, they won't enter the kingdom of heaven. So the church needs to do something about this, especially the church leaders and the community. You should be the one leading it. So that is the end of our episode. I hope you learned something today. And um instead of getting offended uh of my message, take some time to think, really think about what I talk about here today. Because this is really important for the safety of our children and the future generations. I mean, what good is a society that is full of drunken men who intoxicated themselves with cover and abandoned their wives and children? That is not a good society. It's time for change in our Pacific community. So, yeah, that is the end of our episode. Thank you so much for listening. I hope you learned something today. And uh share it with others, share it with parents, share it with your church, um, and share it with um anyone you know that's going through this problem. Discover addictions, you know, it is not good to replace any substance with another substance. Um but yeah, Malo Opito, Blominaka, Fafitae Lava, and have a blessed week.