Episode 18 Feeling Stuck? Ask This One Question

When faith feels heavy and progress stalls, this one question can flip your perspective and open the door to freedom.

• The one question that reframes your entire mindset

• Why this shift matters for your spiritual growth

• How to apply it today (with practical examples)

In this episode, we’re continuing the momentum from last week’s breakthrough conversation. I’m sharing the simple journaling shift that changed everything for me — the one question that helped me uncover hidden beliefs, release shame, and finally move forward.

You’ll hear the real story of how I used this question during my weight‑loss journey, why the first thought is never the real thought, and how adding three little words — “I only think…” — can soften fear and open the door to curiosity.

If you’re a high‑energy woman who feels stuck, this episode will show you the first step toward clarity, movement, and renewed belief.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:42

Welcome back to Outside the Pulpit. Our topic today is going to continue to help you get unstuck for the last time. How one question can unstick your mind. That's what we're going to get into today. First, I'm going to talk a little bit about last week's episode about getting unstuck for the last time because apparently it really struck a chord. We had so many more downloads, more messages, and new women joining the group, our private Facebook group. I found that quite fascinating. And I think it's because so many of you are ready for movement. You're not lacking energy or desire. You're just missing a way forward. And that is something I really want to share with you today. You know, I've told y'all this before. I don't minister anything that I haven't lived first. And I am going to give you straight from my own personal experience something that God has worked in me, a tool and a method that He presented to me, gave to me, and I have applied it in my life. And I want to share it with you because I want to see you unstuck for the last time. So if you're in the private Facebook group, then you know I've been talking about journaling, but not the kind of journaling most of us have done for years, or at least for myself, because for decades my journaling was basically here's what happened today, here's what I'm frustrated about, here's what I wish were different. Okay, there's nothing wrong with that, but it did not create movement, it did not create clarity, and it didn't create transformation. It was like circling the same mountain over and over. And I know many of you feel that. You're not unmotivated, you're not lazy, you're not confused, you're just stuck in a loop of thoughts that never get examined. The biggest change in my journaling, the thing that really unlocked everything for me, honestly, was this. I stopped journaling about my life. And I started journaling into my life. And it began with one little step. I would ask myself a question. And where I started was with this question: what do I think about? Okay, so what do I think about this situation? What do I think about this goal? What do I think about myself in this moment? Here's why this works. Your brain loves to answer questions. It can't help itself. That's why the Got Milk commercials were so effective. They didn't tell you anything, they just asked a question, and your brain immediately started searching for an answer. God designed our minds to seek, to explore, to respond. So I would ask the question and then I would listen. This is really important here. I wrote down every thought, one sentence at a time, unfiltered, not because every thought is true, because it's not. And not because every thought is helpful, because they're certainly not. And a thought is just a spark of electricity in the brain. It has no power until we give it power. Writing it down lets you see it. And when you see it, you don't have to be afraid of it. Psalm 139, 23 says, Search me, O God, and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts. David wasn't afraid of his thoughts. He invited God into them. You know, I have shared with you that the avenue that God used to open me up to this way of living and revealing the all the ways that the enemy was stopping me was through uh searching for weight loss. That's how it played out for me. Your journey may be, you know, whatever, I don't know. So I'm not here to talk about weight loss or teach on weight loss. I'm simply referring back to that because this is how God brought it to me. And what I have found is it's really better just to share something authentically than for me to try to come up with another way of sharing it with you. Because I I firmly believe that I don't minister something I haven't already lived first. And this is a proven method, and this is what's worked for me. So I'm just gonna share part of my journey with you, and maybe that will help uncover some things in whatever area you are feeling stuck. So one of the first times I used this question, I wrote, What do I think about my current weight? And here's something I've learned. The first thought is never the real thought. The first thought is usually polite. And uh it usually takes about four or five thoughts to to come out of your head, out of your mouth, out of your pen, however you want to, however you want to put it, till you finally get to the truth. And here's here's what that looked like for me. So my first few thoughts were I can't believe I'm this big. I'll never lose all of this. It's going to take too long. Nobody ever loses weight for the last time. I've spent my whole life losing weight, but then I got to the ones that hit me in the gut. I never should have let this happen, and I did this to myself. Boom. Those were the thoughts that were carrying all the shame, all the heaviness, all the self-blame, and I didn't know they were there until I wrote them down. Seeing them on paper did not make them true, it just made them visible, and I acknowledged them. And once they were visible, they began to lose their power. Sometimes when a thought felt especially heavy or believable, because look, I'm not being some Pollyanna here telling you you're just gonna write it down and it's all over. Absolutely not. This takes time, this takes effort, this takes a it's a process. I don't always have that uh much, you know, at this stage of what I'm working through, but in the beginning, I certainly did. And sometimes when a thought felt especially heavy or believable, I added three little words in front of it that really helped. And I would say, I only think. So I only think I'm failing. I only think this will never change. I only think I did this to myself. Adding those words softened that thought. It loosened its grip. It reminded me that a thought is not a prophecy, it's not a verdict, it's not a fact, it's just something my brain is offering me in this moment. You know, it takes a lot of time sometimes to let these new concepts begin to sink in. And sometimes I would use that phrase, I just need to get a crowbar up under that thought. And by using those three words, sometimes that would help, just putting that I only think, and whatever the sentence was, it starts to help that sting loosen up. You know, 2 Corinthians 10, 5 says, we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. You can't take something captive if you're fused to it, so if you're connected to it. When you get that crowbar up under it, you begin to bring separation between you and that thought. And the I only think creates just enough space to observe the thought instead of being swallowed by it. Now, I wish I could tell you that I flipped those thoughts into something positive right away. I tried, I really did, but anything I tried to tell myself in those particular moments felt fake. It did not feel authentic, it felt forced, it felt like one of those affirmations you repeat in the mirror, but you don't actually believe. And here's what I've learned: you can't jump from shame to sunshine in one step. So instead of forcing a new belief, I just kept showing up. I kept asking the question, I kept writing the thoughts, I kept adding, I only think when something felt particularly heavy. And over time, not instantly, but over time my brain started offering me different thoughts. Maybe change is possible. Maybe I don't have to do this alone. Maybe I can take one small step. They weren't dramatic, earth-shattering things, but it was a turn. It was a change. They weren't inspirational or affirmation-y, they were just kinder. I was just began speaking to myself in a kinder fashion. Romans 12 and 2 says, be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Renewing doesn't happen in one moment. Renewing is a process. Renewing can happen through repetition. Renewing is returning to the page until your brain begins to offer you something new. That's what happened for me, and that's what can happen for you too. And that, my friends, is the beginning of the five L's it starts with listening, truly listening to what's happening in your mind, in your head, without fear, without judgment, and without shame. Once you learn to listen, everything else becomes possible. It just opens up your mind and your spirit to possibility. This is how high-energy women get unstuck. Not by pushing harder, not by trying to be positive, not by ignoring their thoughts and just sheer willpowering your way through things, but by getting curious, by asking questions, by listening to what rises up, and by letting God meet you in that space. All of this is a work of God's spirit. You just release yourself to him, you look at what's going on, you let him move within you, you let him begin to bring that transformation. His spirit will bring you those thoughts that begin to put those negative things or those unhelpful things to the wayside, and you will begin embracing a new way of thinking, a new way of living. And I am telling you, the possibilities for your life, they're endless. I am living proof. I can't even tell you all the ways. Well, I can, but we'd be here a minute. But all the ways I've mentioned this before: relationship changes, financial changes, ministry changes, spiritual changes, business, all kinds, just anything I can think of. When I apply this process and let God's spirit begin to work in me, to work through me, and bring that change to my life. That is when my life became more aligned with Him. I began to act in a way that more lines up with His Spirit, with His Word. And I know that these are things that we want to do, all while achieving these goals and these dreams and these things that have been hanging around in the back of my mind for a long time. And I tell you, I want you to have that for yourself. I really believe it. So today I want you to try one thing. Open your journal and write this question at the top. What do I think about? Fill in the blank with whatever is weighing on you or exciting you or confusing you or calling you. Then listen. Write one sentence at a time. Don't filter it. Don't judge it. Don't try to fix it. Just let it be. And if a thought feels especially heavy, you can always add those simple three little words. I only think. And let that little bit of space soften the fear and open the door to curiosity. Let your faith begin to come alive and see all the potential that God has for your life. This is the first step toward movement, toward getting unstuck. This is the first step toward clarity. This is the first step toward unlocking the potential that's already inside you. I want you to think about the things that we've talked about today. Pray about it. Take it to heart and just know I'm pulling for you. I see you. I see you, highly motivated, high energy woman out there who's got hopes and dreams just waiting to be tapped into. And I'm here to make this journey with you. Until next time.