Confidence Isn't A Fact

Confidence is a feeling, not a fact. It’s built through practice, courage, and showing up anyway

We’ve been talking a lot about confidence this week in the studio. Both in the sense of building kids up to be able to perform and also in educating parents on letting them try and not writing them off as not confident enough or too shy. 

As adults it’s so easy for us to flippantly say “oh I’m not confident enough to do that” as if we have a set confidence score and it’s not high enough to partake in said activity. And that other adults are automatically pre disposed to being able to do these things better than us because of their in-built confidence. 

But this isn’t the case. I challenge my staff team all the time and really focus on asking them to get out of their comfort zones. Last week for example no one felt confident enough to run a class full of parents. But I said that’s what was happening and I armed them with knowledge, facts and encouragement. 

By the end of the week every single teacher had smashed it and actually enjoyed it. 

Had I said “do it if you feel confident enough”, no one would have stepped up. The fact is that sometimes we need told to try, with option taken away from us, for us to really reach and see our full potential 🫶🏼

So. If you’re thinking about doing something- signing up for an event, completing a challenge, running a race, taking a new class… remove the choice from yourself. Remove the ‘waiting to feel confident’ barrier and simply book it. 

Take that first step towards feeling and being more confident- then back it up with little, consistent steps. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Hi everyone and welcome back to the Impulsive Uncut Podcast. Today I wanted to share a little Thursday thought that's been on my mind this week in the studio after having chatted about it with staff last week and speaking on our newsletter last Thursday. It's something we've been talking about a lot with our staff and our students, and the word is confidence. Here's a thought that I would like us all to start with. Confidence is a feeling, not a fact. It's something that's built through practice, courage, and simply showing up even when we don't feel ready. And I think that's something that so many of us really regularly forget. This week in the studio we've been having a lot of conversation about confidence, partly in terms of building children up to feel they're able to be performed, to take part in our show in June and to try new things, but also in terms of educating parents to let them have a shot. Sometimes children get labelled very quickly as shy or not confident enough. But the truth is, confidence isn't something you either have or don't have. It's something that grows when children are given opportunities to try. And also, adults, we can still grow confidence when we give ourselves opportunities to try. We need to take a step forward, we need to learn to make mistakes, and we need to realize that they and we are capable. It's adults very regularly do this to ourselves. It's so easy to say something like, Oh, I'm not confident enough to do that. As if we all have some sort of confidence score, and unless we reach a certain level, we're not allowed to take part. As if some people were just born with this magical inbuilt confidence allows them to do things that we can. But this just simply isn't the case. Confidence doesn't come before we try something, it comes after. Here's a quick studio example that I was chatting to my team about. Um and we saw this play out just a couple of weeks ago when we did our studio insight week. I regularly challenge my staff to step outside their comfort zones because that's where the real growth happens. I asked them to take classes that wouldn't normally take, potentially speak to parents that they wouldn't normally speak to, just really get themselves into a position where they feel like they're challenging themselves. And when we did our Studio Insight Week, we basically ran classes with parents in the entire session. And that as a teacher is super scary. If you've ever taught a class with lots of adults watching, you'll know that it can really feel quite intimidating. And honestly, no one initially felt confident enough to do it. Not even me, really. But I knew that for our customers, it was something that we wanted to offer, something a bit different, and something that I felt was going to be really valuable to our parents. Now, if I'd said to them, to my team, who feels confident enough to do this? No one would have said yeah. So if I said, okay, next week, I want you to let all the parents in, but just if you feel confident enough to do it, no one would have let the parents in. As it stood, I said, This is what's happening next week. We're all letting the parents in, we're all going to get them involved in the class, we're going to let them see exactly how a dance class works, how we prepare for stuff, how we get the kids to rehearse and the general learning process. I gave them all the tools that they needed and all the backup that they needed. That I had faith in them, I trusted their abilities and reminded them that they really know what they're doing. They are very good at delivering classes. And although it wouldn't be the normal way that we would deliver a class with essentially an audience, we were going to give it a try. I armed them with knowledge, a shared facts, encouragement, and support. And what happened? In the end of the week, every single teacher absolutely smashed it, and not only that, actually enjoyed it. So, really, waiting for confidence does hold us back. And that really proves something important. If I just said, just do it if you feel confident enough, no one would have stepped forward. Sometimes the option to say no is exactly what stops us from growing. And sometimes we need to remove that choice and simply say, this is what's happening, I'm doing this, I'm booking this, I'm going there. Because that's how we actually discover what we're capable of. Confidence isn't what gets you started, it's that action, that first step that you need to take. As adults, we can really apply this to our own lives. If you're thinking about doing something right now, maybe signing up for an event, maybe running a race, joining a new class, trying something you've always quite fancied, but you always keep putting off. Do you keep liking things on social media and think that class looks like it's for me, but I'm not confident enough for it yet? But stop waiting until you feel confident. Instead, remove that barrier, remove the decision, and just book it. Take that step. Because confidence grows after you start, not before. The real secret to confidence is that it's built in the little moments and the tiny actions, the initial step that you take through the door of that class that you're worried about going to. These little steps add up over time. If you try something once, you can remind yourself another point that you've done it before and you're ready to do it again. Until you realize that one thing that used to be scary to you now just feels normal. And if you look back on your own life, there'll be loads of things that you see that you're like, ah, I never used to like doing that, and now I really like doing it. Or I was one really scared to take that first step into that class or that gym or to speak to that new person or go for that interview. But you did it, you succeeded, and you've jumped over that barrier. So we need to stop waiting and we need to start doing. And in terms of what we can do for children, it's exactly the same. We need to remove the barrier of what if, we need to remove the barrier of they're too shy, and we need to allow them to take those steps into becoming a more confident human being. Because at the end of the day, right now they might be five and a little bit worried about going on stage, but one day they'll be 25 and a little bit worried about going to do a job interview, but they'll still have to do it. So if we can arm them with the knowledge that you can do hard things, arm them with it now and it's with them for life. So that's my little Thursday thought for today. If there's something you've been thinking about doing, don't feel like you're waited, you're ready, just do it now. Take that first step because confidence isn't a fact, it's something we build one moment at a time. Thank you so much for listening, and we'll speak again next time.