How a lack of leadership made me a leader of myself

Welcome back to The Made For More Podcast. In this episode, I’m sharing the real story behind why I walked away from a job I held for 11 years—and what it revealed about growth, leadership, creativity and self-worth.

I found myself in an environment that felt stagnant, where opportunities were limited, creativity wasn’t encouraged, and leadership didn’t align with its words. Over time, that disconnect created a friction I couldn’t ignore. I started to realize something that changed everything: you can only grow as far as the person leading you… unless you decide to GO lead yourself!

This episode is about recognizing when you’ve outgrown a space, the red flags in leadership that I ignored for too long, and how a lack of opportunity  ultimately pushed me to become the leader I needed. If you’ve been feeling stuck, undervalued, or like there’s more in you that isn’t being tapped into because of the environment your in and the leadership you are under—then this conversation is for you!

Sometimes growth doesn’t look like staying and pushing harder. Sometimes it looks like leaving, risking it all and taking what you learned to be and not to be and going to blaze a trail of your own.

You were made for more than settling just because your environment has chosen to settle. Go out there and create your MORE!

With love, Miranda 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:02

Hey guys, welcome back to the Made for More podcast. I am your host and your friend Miranda Hammock. This past week was two years since I worked my very last day as an employee at a salon and left to go do my own thing on my own venture where I created and developed the vision and the brand that I had for my salon Evolve Studio where I merged life coaching and hairstyling. And I want to give you an inside look of the backstory about what it looked like and how I knew I was done working where I was working and I was ready to go out on my own venture. I hope you enjoy the Inside Scoop. I'll see you there. Two years ago on April 30th, 2020, 24, I was closing out my very last day at a salon that I had worked at for 11 years. And did you know that the person I worked for had no idea that that was my last day? Even though I had put in a notice on April 1st and I gave them a timeline of within that month, they had no idea, because they hadn't even checked in with me that that was my last day. And had I not just walked out the back door and told the person it was my last day, I don't even know if they would have realized it for a couple more days. But instead, I said, you know what? I'm gonna go turn in my key. I walked up and I said, Hey, I guess you don't know this, but today's my last day. Here's my key. And the person just looked at me and was like, I didn't know. And I'm like, yeah, because you don't ask. And that was my very last confirmation that I was on the right path. I knew that where I was, I was not seen, I was not heard, I was not valued. And I just want that to be a reminder to not stay stuck in small places, to not stay stuck in small spaces that don't see you, don't value you, don't hear you, don't know you, and they won't miss you. So go fly, go be great, go seek out change, even if there's fear around it. I stayed complacent and stayed stuck and stayed under poor leadership for years, hoping and wishing that it would be something different. And honestly, I held on to the false narrative that this person was gonna create something different for so long. I was told for years that we're gonna get a new building and we're gonna do this and we're gonna get that. Do you know I worked somewhere for 11 years and they never had a website? I was never on a website. I was never advertised, I was never on a website. I would push for more in an area that was not willing to grow. So you can either stay stuck and complacent and settle in for average, bare minimum, and half ass, or you can choose to go sore and fly and go your own direction in your own way and bet on yourself and do it scared. I did it so scared. I remember putting in my notice and my boss being like, Well, where is it? And I told her, and she was like, her reaction was, Do you think your clients are gonna drive that way? And I said, It's like 11 minutes up the road. And I said, I'm willing to bet, I'm willing to bet everything. And I asked for respect for my decision. I said, you know, one day you had to take a chance on you and put your name on the outside of a building. And that is exactly what I'm doing is taking a chance and putting my stamp on something, and I'm willing to risk it all to see what happens. And honestly, I'm so proud of that girl because I I look back and I know that I was under um I was under this like fog of this idea that this person made me believe I couldn't be anything more than what she had to offer me. That this person made me to believe that this was the best of the best and there's nothing else around or better. And, you know, in every way that this person failed me or disappointed me, it actually just was a teaching tool to go teach me how I will never treat other people if I ever have employees. I will never settle for average for my clients, I will never settle for bare minimum. And because of the poor leadership, I feel like I have learned to lead myself better because I was failed. And for so long, I wanted this environment to be something different. I really had big hopes and dreams, and honestly, it had so much potential. And I think that's why I was so sad when I put in my notice. I was so excited for something new, but I was like going, it was like going through a mental breakup because I could see the potential and I could see how amazing the talent was in the building, and I could see that the people that worked in the building and as well as the clients that came through the door deserved more than what they were given. And I wanted that for them, but it wasn't up to me. And so when you can see the potential in something and know that it could be something even more amazing, and then know that it's never going to receive that, is it's heartbreaking. But it also taught me a lot about leadership. It also taught me that I can't have anybody in my life whose actions and words do not match. If you tell someone all day long, we're gonna get this and I'm gonna fix this and we're gonna change this, and you say that for weeks, months, years, you're saying the same thing, and you never follow through with your actions, eventually the people around you know that your actions and your words don't match. And I remember actually another stylist saying that, and she put it in this term. She's like, It's like if I told my kids, we're gonna go to Disneyland, like we're going so soon. I just know we're gonna go soon, we're gonna go soon. So just get ready and like be patient, like we're gonna go to Disneyland. And your kids get all excited, and maybe your kids start to pack up their items and they're starting to plan and prepare. And you keep saying, just hold on, like we're gonna go to Disney. I just gotta do this one thing first, but we are going to Disney. And so then your kids like get their bag and they're they're getting in the car because they're ready to go. And you keep saying, like, but I just have one more thing I have to do once I get through this one more thing, then we're gonna go to Disney. And then your kids wait in the car for so long and they realize, oh, we're not we're not going to Disney. I'm gonna get out, I'm gonna put my bags and I'm gonna go inside. I'm just gonna kind of hang out and see when we're going to Disney. And you keep saying, We're almost there, I just I just have to do this one more thing. And then before you know it, like years have gone by, and then the kids are like, Yeah, let me unpack this suitcase because we're we're not going to Disney anytime soon. And I remember my coworker saying that to my boss. And I remember being like, it is absolutely spot on that when you come and you ask for things to be resolved, when you ask for change, when you ask for something better, when you ask for things to be fixed, when you ask for solutions, and the person says, But we're gonna get a new building, but we're gonna get a new building. Do you know I've been gone for two years and the girls are still in the same building? And I'm sure there's still a leak in the ceiling. I'm sure that the bathrooms still haven't been updated. I'm sure they're still running out of shampoo. And I hate that for them. But I am just, I guess, just reflecting on what was and what is. And I am very thankful to be on my own path. It's uh it's a hard path. I'll tell you, I didn't choose the easier route. I actually chose a harder route. It would have been easier to just stay and settle in for you know bare minimum and just know that it is what it is and whatnot, but I wanted more for myself, and more than anything, I wanted more for my clients, and so I'm so thankful that I took the risk and that I decided to jump and to fly. I wasn't the only one, I think I was one of five um stylists who left in a in a transition period of like two months, and I think what's crazy is we had all been there. Um, some of them had been there 18 plus years, and I think once you see one person leave under this, like, I don't know, this person had such a stronghold on our group, and I think once you see them go find more for themselves or bet on themselves, and you see that oh, that they jumped and they're okay, they jumped and they didn't fail, they jumped and they're actually thriving, then it gave you confidence to go jump to. And I just watched, and I still see that several of them are just doing amazing things and have grown and shifted and um have blossomed in such a beautiful way, and I just really want to be an encouragement for someone who feels like you're in the rhythm of a career or maybe leadership or a job where you look around and it just feels empty. And one of the last things I said when I was putting in my notice was this place is a slow burn, and I'm not willing to burn anymore. And I just want to ask you that too. Is where you're at a slow burn? Are you burning with everyone around you? Is it stagnant? Is it stale? Or is it thriving? Is it growing? And let me also say this. I had this realization about a year before I put my notice in, but it was this you can only grow as far as whoever is leading you. Take a look at your leadership, your manager, your boss, your CEO. Are they growing? Do they do bare minimum? Do they do half-assed work? Are they even present? Are you even able to get a hold of them? Do they cut corners? Do they care about the details? Are they pushing themselves to expand and to grow and to challenge themselves? Because if not, I have a news news for you, and it is you will not be able to grow any further than whoever is leading you. And sometimes that's an unfortunate wake-up call is when you take a look and you realize maybe you're stuck because your leadership is stuck or your leadership is lacking, you're not going to be able to grow past that. And let me also say that if and when you try to challenge that and grow past that, I can promise you the leadership that is lacking on growth and not willing to grow, they will not like it when you try to grow, when you try to bring solutions, when you try to expand, when you try to evolve, they will not like it. And it will, it will cause friction in your life eventually to the point where you say, I've got to get out, I've got to go. And when you do, I want you to have confidence and security that maybe the reason it wasn't working for you anymore in the job that you're in under the leadership that you're in, maybe the reason it's not working for you is because you are meant to be a leader, but you are in an employee position. And maybe you can't lead because you're under poor leadership. Maybe it's time for you to leave and go elsewhere in a different space so that you can lead and you can take hold of the leadership and the lock and the average and the bare minimum, and you can set a trail that will set ablaze for growth and creativity and expansion, not only for you, but for whatever the company, brand, or career field that you are in. So leaving embedding on yourself in transition is hard. It is really hard. There's almost a sense of guilt, but then there becomes this feeling of like, I if I stay here, like I settle, I settle for average. But when you stay, when you've been somewhere and it's all you've ever known, there feels like a sense of guilt. I thought I was going to retire from the place that I worked. I never wanted to go anywhere else. And I remember when I started to think about leaving, I literally would feel nauseous, like thinking about going anywhere else. Because I was like, I don't want anywhere else. I just want the place that I'm in and I want more for it. And when I left, I actually felt bad. I felt bad for leaving behind the people that I left. And I felt bad for the owner and the leadership because I just know that this person has the capability for so much more in their life, but they get themselves in their own way and filled with their own excuses and their actions and their words don't match. And so they'll forever be in a cycle of staying stuck, staying small, and not growing. And I hate that because I know the talent in the building deserves more and I know the clients deserve more, but you can't constantly worry about everyone else and try to take everyone with you. Your growth journey is not intended for you to grab everyone around you and take them with you. Maybe you're meant to go grow on your own. Maybe you're a leader, maybe you're an entrepreneur. So that's my story. It's part of the reason I named the salon Evolve Studio because I was evolving. I was evolving from being an employee, an unseen, undervalued employee. And I was stepping into leading myself and being the owner and taking charge. And I can say that my cup is full. My cup is so full. I don't ask anyone's permission. I also, I still to this day, when I go open the salon, I'm like, you know what's great? I'm opening the salon and I will never have to worry about if our towels got washed, if our receptionist called out, and then the leadership didn't communicate that with us, if we ran out of shampoo or conditioner or trash bags, because that was a common thing to be paying top dollar and booth rent and run out of shampoo and conditioner and trash bags. I never had to worry about any of that. I didn't have to worry about if the if it was raining outside, would it also be raining inside and leaking inside for us to try to clean up while we're also trying to juggle our clients all day and the owner's owner be absolutely nowhere found? And for that I'm grateful because my value in my space and my respect for the space that I have, I steward it well. And I believe how you do one thing is how you do everything. If you can't humble yourself and get down on your hands and knees and scrub the scrapes on the baseboard, if you can't humble yourself and scrub a toilet, then you won't steward the client, the well-paying client right in front of you. You won't steward the business right in front of you. And so I truly live by that. And yeah, I'm I honestly just feel a sense of freedom. I've never really talked publicly about my last day and how things went. But I looked at the calendar today and I was like, wow, this was my last day. And I remember I had to go tell her that. Like your employee of 11 years and you had no idea because you avoided me since the day I put in my notice. Um, and yeah, it was just confirmation for me. It's like, I honestly, you made it easier. Thank you for making it easier for me to leave. But prior to that, whenever someone left, whether it'd be a stylist, which was few and far between, a stylist, but you know, receptionist, something like that, we would do like a cookie cake or like a lunch or something, a card, nothing. I got nothing. Um, and honestly, part of me recognized that I was part of the uh group, the very small group of individuals who actually would rally around and be like, hey, I'm gonna go pick up a card. Hey, I'm gonna go get a cake, hey, I'm gonna go get her favorite thing. And so I kind of realized like that's why that didn't happen because it wasn't that my boss was intentional, it was that the girls around me were intentional. Um, and the right ones were there for me. The right ones, you know, met me and went me, what went with me out to dinner afterwards, and the right ones celebrated me and still stand by me to this day. So, anyways, I know that somebody out there needs the encouragement to go fly and to go expand and to go evolve. You are made for more than staying in small places, and you are more than staying somewhere just because you're scared of your boss, and your boss has led you to believe that nothing else is better than them or this company or this brand. And uh, there actually is, there's a lot better out there for you. It feels scary, but I can promise you, as someone who's chosen to jump and chosen to do it in her own way and in her own direction, willing to risk it all. It has brought me more success, peace, joy, and overall purpose and fulfillment into my life. And the same can be true for you because you were made for more and you always have been.