Mostly Legal

Mostly Legal Monday - 40 EPISODES!!

• Stephen Dinkins • Season 1 • Episode 40

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Welcome back gang! Mostly Legal is happy to celebrate 40 episodes. Hope you enjoy one of our most law heavy episodes yet! Thanks for your support!

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SPEAKER_03

So at this point things have gone badly awry and I am in handcuffs head into the sheriff's Devity's car and um we did see one other screen savor it was you doing push-ups and and knowing if you really are a good guy, we do want to hear about the second time you got to go to jail.

SPEAKER_00

All right, all right, all right. Welcome home to the Mostly Legal Podcast. We're thrilled to have another great episode coming up with our friend Daniel Andrews. We talked to him into sticking around for another episode, and we're gonna get into some great stories. I'm Stephen Dinkins, your host of the Mostly Legal Podcast, and I'm here as always with my brother Scott Dinkins, who drove down from Chapin to be our producer and content uh extraordinaire. And then I got Bubba Johnston down there at the end of the table, keeping everybody honest, making fun of people and their disabilities, just dragging people through the mud. So we got him here for that, and it's gonna be a good time. I do want to give a shout-out real quick to the listener of the week, Paul Jones. Paul's a good friend. Paul Paul would probably never go on a podcast and just rake me over to Coles or anything, you know. He wouldn't do that kind of stuff. I think we're just gonna be able to do that. Paul's a good friend. He's a professional engineer here in town, and uh being a good listener and been a good encourager, I think, to all of us at one time or another. He's run into us and told us about listening to the podcast and enjoying the story. So, Paul, thanks for listening. Thanks for sharing, thanks for encouraging other people to listen. Uh, you've been a good friend, and we appreciate you here on the podcast. And maybe one of these days we'll get you on here and we can go over some old trath line stories. Paul was the one that was our ring leader and really the one that got us into some of the trathlines 15, 16 years ago for us to show all of our glory.

SPEAKER_02

You and Paul compete in a barbecue contest. One did weren't you in one barbecue cook-off contest one time?

SPEAKER_00

You know what? I almost forgot about that story, but you're exactly right. Paul came to me if I remember right, and uh John Hyatt had the Southern States franchise in town, you know, the feed and seed store downtown on Broad Street, and he was having a barbecue contest, and I I think maybe Paul came to me and wanted us to enter it. But I know, I mean, I know how to grill a steak, but I'm not much on barbecue and chicken and different things. But you know who is? Paul. Bubba Johnston. What Paul wanted to do it, but he was he didn't know quite how to do it either. But we were friends with John. We were trying to support John, if I remember the story straight.

SPEAKER_02

Well, and I think John kind of challenged y'all too. He kind of, and as we established last time, whether it's a push-up contest or foot race, Steven does not back down from the challenge. And if you if you challenge him, he he is on, it's on.

SPEAKER_00

So we so we accepted the challenge, we're gonna enter in this barbecue contest, and then I was like, Can I make barbecue?

SPEAKER_03

Who's barbecued?

SPEAKER_00

So it was a barbecue chicken, and so I called, I do what I always do when I need help. I called Bubba. I was like, Bubba.

SPEAKER_02

Kind of like the turkey hunt episode last time we talked about this.

SPEAKER_00

I don't need you to call a turkey tomorrow, but I do need you to help. I'm supposed to barbecue chicken. And uh, you know, he is secretive. He's CIA. We've talked about that before.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And he's usually that way with his barbecue recipe, honestly. But to his credit, he came clean. He gave me the recipe, he told me exactly what to do step by step. Paul and I did exactly what he told us to do. I mean, right down to where to go get the chicken quarters. I mean, everything. And we did it. And who do you think won that barbecue contest at Southern States that day? Paul Jones and Stephen.

SPEAKER_02

Y'all got a trophy and everything. What?

SPEAKER_00

We got a trophy and everything. I don't know where the trophy is right now. Maybe it's in Paul's office. I'm not sure. Might be next year, turkey cards.

SPEAKER_02

I think you might have gotten a gift card to like to Southern States. You could use that like for your food plot management.

SPEAKER_00

I probably bought Sarah some bird feed or something.

SPEAKER_02

You didn't give it to Bubba?

SPEAKER_00

I did not give it to Bubble.

SPEAKER_02

I didn't have nothing to do with that other than just kind of a little bit of, I mean, if you got good, if you got good students, once again, kind of like a kind of like a a great turkey, I'll make you into a great turkey hunter. I mean, if you got great students, I mean, it'll make you into a great teacher. Thank you, Bubba, for saying that.

SPEAKER_00

That was very encouraging. I appreciate that. That felt so good.

SPEAKER_03

He's setting you up for something.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, no.

SPEAKER_00

All right. So anyway, Paul, thanks for listening. We're gonna move on to Daniel Andrews. He's back, one of the Andrews brothers, a great outdoorsman, a great father. We talked about a lot of that. Daniel, I think that you last time on the last episode, you just scratched the surface of some of your authority stories. I feel like there were some more where you either maybe got a ticket or should have gotten a ticket, or it weren't in a right relationship maybe with the lawman. Tell us another couple stories that had something to do with that.

SPEAKER_03

There are several more, unfortunately. And uh some of these are ones you can't make up. So I starting in high school, so I'd say I guess it was my senior year because it was, as I remember, it was senior cut day.

SPEAKER_01

At this point, you already had a record. Yeah, I guess I did from the bar pit incident.

SPEAKER_03

So I had a a girl in Bishopville had invited me to one of their traditions at Robert E. Lee Academy, okay, which I had never been to, so I did not know about their traditions. But one of their traditions was their last day of school, I think it was the um juniors would ride through the parking lot and throw water balloons at the seniors, and they had a big water balloon fight on the last day on the way to class. So at that point I had a I had a black Toyota with big mud tires on it. I I cared about that truck way too much at that time, but it was a pretty cool truck, and um they wanted to get the back of my truck. So I said, sure, I'm out of school that day. Anyway, I was already done. I mean, at this point of your senior year, the last few days, uh, we didn't have to go. So I showed up and they all got in the back of the truck, and you basically take a little loop through the town, and you go into Robert E. Lee, and there's a horseshoe there, and I'm going through and they're having their water balloon fight, and I've got the music cranked up, you know, and everybody's having a great time. Everybody except for the school authorities. The school authorities were mad about the whole thing because they were all late to class, they all weren't supposed to be doing it, evidently, and um they locked the gates at Robert E. Lee on me. So everybody jumps out, they go to class, I'm stuck in this driveway with the gate locked, so I jump out and I say, I don't want to go to school here, I need to get out of the gate. And the person at the gate said, I don't want to hear it, it's time for you to go to class. So they thought I was lying to them about not going to school there and trying to get out because it was the end of the year. So I talked to them and it this was getting going nowhere. So first bad decision of my day that day was in my 17-year-old brain, I said, Hmm, fine, I'll just go to class. So I went to I went and walked the halls of Roberty Lee, and I found her class, and I went in and sat down, and they it was exam day. That's why they were mad at them. So it wasn't they did have something to do. They were supposed to be in there taking exams. So I found an empty seat and they passed out exams. I grabbed one. So here I am, I'm I'm taking an exam in a class I've never been to. I love it. And I'm gonna be honest with you, I was crushing it. I mean, I'm feeling in here, I'm crushing this thing. And what did not register in my 17-year-old brain was that one month before this was the first school shooting at Columbine in Colorado, that happened in April. Oh wow. This story takes place in May. So while I'm in there, I'm probably halfway through my Scantron, bubbling in with my number two pencil, crushing this exam, when I feel like the the Lee County Elite SEAL Team 6 SWAT team descends on this classroom and find myself on the desk in handcuffs and heading out the door.

SPEAKER_02

It never occurred to you the teacher probably realized that you had not been in the class the whole year and you just showed up for the test.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I mean, at this point I was just having fun with it, and she wasn't saying anything. The reason she wasn't saying anything is she'd already called the police on it, so that she was just letting things go. I thought it was I was doing well. You know, I was not disrupting anything, I was taking my test. They locked me in, you know. What was I doing wrong, right? So at this point, things have gone badly awry, and I am in handcuffs heading to the sheriff's deputy's car, and um I am trying to explain myself in Stephen Dinkin' style, and it's not going well.

SPEAKER_01

Diplomacy is out the window.

SPEAKER_03

Diplomacy has have left the building at this point.

SPEAKER_00

So you see what it happened, wasn't it?

SPEAKER_03

Yes. So I take my ride in the police car to the Lee County jailhouse. Good gracious. And um Black Toyota. It is left behind it at at school. They did not impound it because I I don't think they knew which one was mine at that point. It was in the parking lot where it was supposed to be. Well, if I went to school there is where it was supposed to be. And uh anyway, so I I'm thinking all the way to the jail, what in the world do I know now? And from all the TV I'd watch, you get one phone call, right? And um I'm thinking, I ain't calling my dad, because this is gonna go badly. My dad was tough, right? Um so I I called my mom, but both my parents work full time. So, and I think they they were of the school of thought here that if you get yourself into this kind of stupidity, you can sit there until I get done with work. So this happened first period of the first class, and my parents came to get me out of the Lee County jail after they got off work. So I had an entire day. Now I did make buddies with the with the guys at the at the sheriff's department, and I think it was the MBA finals or something. So we were watching ESPN at the jail house. In the big house. In the big house all day long, and uh until they got there to pick me up, and I I didn't I didn't not think things were gonna go well with my dad. Um I was scared of that, him showing up. But I'll tell you, in this particular situation, the only thing that helped me was as he questioned them, their side of this story got to him dumber and dumber and dumber to the point where he was like, Why didn't y'all let him out the gate? Why didn't you let him out of the classroom? Why did you so I ended up coming out of it okay with that, and I did not end up with any long-term effects. I'm not on any registries anywhere or anything that I know of. Right. But that was that was a long day into Lee County.

SPEAKER_02

Example number um 10 million of what was your what was your advice to the to the to the boys on the way to the turkey hunt?

SPEAKER_00

When you're pursuing those girls, sometimes you don't think straight. And um You probably don't make the pet decision. Daniel was pursuing this girl, didn't think straight, didn't think through all these decisions.

SPEAKER_03

Man, I was just taking a test, man. Just taking a test. I still wonder what I would have made if they didn't let me finish.

SPEAKER_00

But uh Daniel, why are you thinking about the next authority story? Uh while you're lining that up. Uh he's already been in jail and written a ticket by the time he's 18. I was on the phone with Daniel the other day, and I'm anxious to hear these stories, and here's why. I'm on the phone with Daniel, and I know Daniel really well. And he makes this comment. So I thought. And he makes this comment to me. He says, you know, for a guy who's generally tried to do the right thing my whole life, it's hard to believe I've ended up in jail twice. So I'm giving you a little bit of a heads up that we've got some more keyboard. That's exactly right. But our our listeners need to know that there was a time when we were working together at Cornerstone, Caldwell Bank of Commercial Cornerstone, doing commercial real estate, that Daniel developed the nickname Screensaver.

unknown

Oh boy.

SPEAKER_00

I've forgotten this. Yeah, he he was known as Screensaver in the office. And you might ask Stephen, why was Daniel called Screenshot?

SPEAKER_02

Stephen, why were they called Screensaver?

SPEAKER_00

So tell us. We did some uh like photoshoots. We did some photo shoots for some advertisements that we were putting in the item. Uh and so, you know, of each of us and of us together, I guess it was just us together, maybe in a conference show. I'm sure it was. No, I'm gonna get to the crop. So so we send the images over to the item to do the advertisement. And then they called us over to do some like headshots or something. And so some of us have to go over to the item headquarters together. And as we're walking through this is the old item headquarters, like back when newspapers were a big deal.

SPEAKER_02

The big bill.

SPEAKER_00

And it was like, you know, like a press room out of the movies. There's just people everywhere, cubicles everywhere. And we're walking through the hall behind these cubicles, and there's this one computer. And this young lady had taken a liking to Daniel when he had been there for a time. How could you not? And she took that picture of all of us and she cropped it down to one person, and that one person with her screensaver on her computer on her desk.

SPEAKER_01

Now, for all the 20-year-olds out there, they don't even know what a screensaver is.

SPEAKER_00

Well, you gotta have some picture that sits, you know, as your background of your big computer back then.

SPEAKER_01

IBM to save your screen from crying.

SPEAKER_00

And so there's Daniel's picture bounced around.

SPEAKER_03

I don't even know what to say about this one. That green saved it. I completely forgot.

SPEAKER_00

The girl that went to Roberty Lee, you think?

SPEAKER_03

No, no.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know what happened to that girl, but when when Lisa found out about it, I think Lisa took care of her. I don't think Lisa.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Oh my gosh. That's Stephen coming out with the low blows. I mean, I'm gonna write it down.

SPEAKER_00

That's quite the honored. I was on nobody's screensaver. You just dropped out. I mean we did see one other screensaver. It was Hugh doing push-ups. Uh Jay and I and Stephen the Chance. We didn't make the cut.

SPEAKER_02

That was pretty, pretty good. I have to ask you a question and we'd like to know truly it, and this is gonna kind of bounce off but come back. Outdoors, you're you're quite an outdoorsman. You you talk about Jenkins and everything else, but the apple does not fall from far from the tree. Um, I noticed you have been very successful fishing. You and John Robert have really caught a lot of fish and everything. You've killed some really big deer. Most memorable outdoor experience. I know that's on the spot, but just I want to be what pops in your mind first. Most memorable outdoor experience you had. Can you give me more than one?

SPEAKER_03

Give me two. All right. So I love to hunt, I love to fish. But um the best fishing day I've ever had was um with my dad coming up when I was five or six years old. He and my grandfather joined the Sumter Watery Club, and they used to have family day in the summer, and I would just die to go fishing. And one summer he took us down there for family day, and we went, we didn't even put a boat in, we drove um to the s to the suburban, which I've got a whole list of suburban stories here, we're gonna have to get to at some point. But the uh suburban around bridge to bridge in Sumter Watery, and I caught thirty-seven bass without leaving the bridges. And then I told my dad I wanted to catch fifty. This was like ten o'clock in the morning. He threw me in a boat with a paddle, and I caught the fiftieth one as we were taking the boat out, so I caught fifty bass by lunchtime in Sumter Watery. As a kid that was super memorable to do that and do it with my dad. And then um as far as fishing Jenkins in these tournaments, he and Ben went blindly into the state championship a couple years ago at Lake Murray. Uh no practice fishing, kind of came out of left field like Jenkins likes to do sometimes, and um fished that tournament, caught over twenty pounds, and it was I think two hundred and forty-seven boats in that tournament, and only the top two made it to the national championship, and he'd always wanted to go to the national championship put on by Bassmaster. It was a big deal. And he finished second in that tournament with twenty-something pounds, and I'll I'll never forget that. So those two jump out to me as two great experiences. Both fishing, there's a ton of hunting too, but I I have a question.

SPEAKER_00

When you're like if if I go watch my boys play golf, I kinda kinda sit back and I can watch them from afar, you know, play golf or basketball. You get to watch the game from the stands. D did do you get to follow them around and watch them fish?

SPEAKER_03

So I'm the boat captain, so I'm in the boat with them. Okay. I can't fish, but I drive. Okay. Which is the only time I ever get to drive the boat, so on tournament day when the rules pr make me drive the boat.

SPEAKER_00

Very good. Okay, that's really cool that you were there. No wonder that was a special day.

SPEAKER_02

Kind of like I was talking to Steven on the phone the other day, and like we're in mid-conversation. He's like, Woohoo, birdie! And I was like, What in the world, Stephen? What's that? Oh, well, I'm at this this golf match, and you start talking quiet again then. And Nehemiah just just hit a birdie, like from he said, Man, he's been playing bad, and he just hit a birdie and it was great. And so he's very excited. So, I mean, I guess the same as you were excited for for Nehemiah the other day when he he birdied. Um that's pretty cool stuff. I think it's two great memories, one one that you and then one would would Absolutely experience it with Josh.

SPEAKER_03

Just with your dad or with your kids, you know, like just Caleb and Joshua. I got Joshua caught a giant bass on a beetle spin one time in the pond, it'd be a great story. And and Caleb killed his eight point when he was seven or eight years old, and that's a great story. And then those things really stick with you as a father. Um just as really special moments. You just never forget. They're burned into your mind doing it with somebody you love.

SPEAKER_02

And probably one of the and and those go to kind of the I guess the foundation of like mostly legal. We do talk about most legal things, but also the fact of trying to help people realize that these memories you make, whether they were made with your father, with you, so many big Steve and Scott and Steven stories, and and you know, me with with my father, and and then me with Thomas, and then y'all with y'all boys, and that kind of stuff. And that's what it's really about, these memories that we talked about and stuff. That's just a good thing. So it's pretty neat that you brought those up, and it just really does hit to the to kind of the foundation of where we are. So so with that being said, and and knowing that you really are a good guy, we do want to hear about the second time you got went to jail. Like transmission back. Let's let's go back to the man.

SPEAKER_03

All right, so it really wasn't too far after that one as I think about it. So so that was in May, last day of high school. So I get up to Clemson, and um I have finagled my way into a job at the Esso Club that you see on TV for all the football games and stuff, and um I had a group of friends up there, and we this first semester, I know it was first semester, had to been an early snow because my brother was still there and he graduated in December. So we had one semester at Clemson together, which was fantastic um as as brothers to be able to go to the same school, at least for a little while. And um it snowed and when I mean when a bunch of rednecks are around and it snows, it just everybody loses their mind, you know. We were we were gonna have some fun. So we woke up that morning and a couple of us piled into trucks, and my truck's the center of all these stories, I think. So we found an open place. I at the at this time did not realize it was the practice baseball field because it was covered with white snow. I just knew it was really covered with white snow.

SPEAKER_00

That was a good place to play.

SPEAKER_03

And Clemson was closed, right? The school was shut down, it was snow, there was nobody out there. So this beautiful white snow, and man, we start cutting donuts, and and my truck and the other truck that was out there with me, uh, old Pat's truck, I think Chad was in that one if I remember right. So he was around for this incident, and um the the snow is flying. I mean, we're throwing rooster tails, we've got it locked up and this pipes are roaring, and we are having some country. Got a music turned up. We're having some country boy fun in this snow. There's nothing out that here, you just I mean, we have fun. And I'm spinning. I'm spinning to the point where I'm about to get dizzy. And um, yeah, so I'm I'm in like loop eight on the 360s here, and I'm spinning around in circles, and I notice the other trucks gone, and I was like, what in the world? Well, the next loop, as I'm spinning, I see blue lights, no lights, blue lights, no lights, blue lights, no lights. And I and at this point, panic sets in, things have I've gone awry again. So I stop and um the the the blue lights are on and he's he's got me, he's sitting there, so I'm thinking up my story and what to say and roll down the window. They locked me in. I had no locking in, there was no gate. So um no glass to take a test. I mean first thing I'm wondering is where is the other truck? So they got away, evidently. They saw the blue lights before I did, and he took, instead of chasing them, he decided to take the easy pickings that was still doing donuts that didn't realize the blue lights were coming yet. And uh he walks up to my window and pauses for a second, and the first words out of his mouth are, Are you an idiot? And I remember biting my tongue for a minute and I was thinking, what's the proper answer? Like maybe, or you know, what do I say here? And uh I am trying to very um carefully talk my way out of the situation, and it's just not going well at all. He's explaining to me that this is the practice baseball field, which I had no idea. It just looked like a flat spot with hurt. And he said, back to the idiot comment, he said, Do you realize that the police station is right there? And he points to the police station. The police station's in the stadium, right, at this point. It's moved now, but it was under the stadium, and and I did not realize that the police station was right there. So he says that he and the boys basically were drinking coffee that morning, and he said, All of a sudden, a quiet snow morning when we should all have a quiet day and no school in session, it sounds like a NASCAR race in the police there. And uh and that one went bad. So I had to go down to the station and I get my again, this is the second time now I'm thinking of my one phone call. Definitely not call my parents from there in this situation. Well, that was my first thought, but then he was in the group that's high tailing it out of there, so I'm not sure I should bring it might have been the same huddle that gave you the ticket when you might have been. So fortunately, my buddy Ron, that owned the Escal Club, knew everybody in Clemson and they all loved him, right? So I I get Ron, and Ron gets me out of this situation. And um he that week gets with some people he knows, and I ended up getting off with just community service. And then some of them came to the SO all the time, and I ended up not even having to do the community service. So it was very gracious of Ron to get me out of this mess. Rewing the way and got out of community service. I got out of this mess and um I learned a little something. So never past that point did I ever get arrested again. I did have some more incidences, but um I didn't get arrested.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, you're making a mistake there was not knowing where the police department was. Yes.

SPEAKER_02

So I did not realize I was crossing. Ahead of Daniel, many years ahead of Daniel. You'll get a kick out. So so you that was not the first dumb thing that they had seen happen. I had a good friend of mine at Clemson, I'm not gonna say his name because he's not here to defend himself. But I had a good friend at Clinton. What is that ever said? Because this guy has moved on, and this probably would be problems later on. But they had a little KA Sunrise mixer one morning. Uh-huh. And he probably was not all the way thinking straight. But he came out of the KA Sunrise Mixer, and there in front of him he decided was the perfect opportunity. Cause the Clemson Post Office uh postal vehicle had been left running. Because the man is going to deliver a package. And he decided to take this for a little spin around campus. Borrow it. And it did not end well. It ended with a police chase and a federal, that's a federal deal when you kind of commandeer a postal vehicle, and it did not end well at all. He uh he ended up okay, but I think I think the um probably the first words from the police when they did commandeering was, are you an idiot? I think that might have been probably what they asked him to. So so they had practiced that they had probably rehearsed that line when they came to you.

SPEAKER_03

Same guy. Yeah, I it was not the last time I saw those guys.

SPEAKER_02

So that's a great story.

SPEAKER_03

Good to update. I mean, could you have that fun at Carolina though? I mean it I don't know. You wouldn't have had the you wouldn't have had the uh environment we had there for that at all.

SPEAKER_01

Yes, you can have that fun at Carolina. Then you're listening to Stephen Lincoln.

SPEAKER_03

I heard Stephen Lincoln's about white lightning, man. Wasn't it white lightning?

SPEAKER_00

Putting it in the ditch of the apartment complex. Hit some golf balls down the parkway.

SPEAKER_03

Gill Creek Parkway. There you go. I mean, you can have some fun in those days.

SPEAKER_00

Daniel would appreciate this quick story. Going back to Lincoln and uh where we lived in that apartment complex uh called Hampton Green on Gills Creek Parkway. They had some sand volleyball courts down at kind of the bottom. It was on this built on this hill.

SPEAKER_03

I'm sure you're sure y'all looked like Top Gun, like Tom Cruise, Val Kilma.

SPEAKER_02

You kind of you kind of remind me of Iceman. I get that a lot.

SPEAKER_00

And so we would get in there and play and play volleyball. I can see it. And below the volleyball sand pit was this uh basically like retention pond and ditch that carried the water from the apartment complex down into Gilles Creek. But it was all overgrown with briars. I mean, big briars. I mean eight feet tall briars. And every now and then somebody would spike it really hard like off my face and it would bounce way over in those briars. And uh it was always a chore to get them. Well, I have my big Bronco and I had a big four Bronco like OJ. Like OJ. An OJ Bronco. I'm so proud of my OJ Bronco. But at that time, I mean, it it wasn't an OJ Bronco then. It was a Bronco. Cool view. This was before OJ did his thing. So I was like, you know what? Didn't didn't do his thing. If the glove don't fit, you must have moved it. So we can come back and comment on OJ later. But I take my OJ Bronco and I was like, guys, don't worry about that soccer ball. I'll get it. I'll drive down in there for my Bronco, of course, and I'll get it.

SPEAKER_02

Made perfect sense.

SPEAKER_00

He's got four-wheel drive and big tires. Not as big as Daniel would have had, but it was big tires. So I put that thing in there and I'm all excited about showing off how I can drive down in this mug. So I drive down in there and I'm running over all these big briars and Lincoln's barefoot up on the hood.

SPEAKER_04

Barefoot on the hood.

SPEAKER_00

Like a hood armor. This mental image just got infinitely better. The human hood armor. Here we go. He is the hood armor. So I keep creeping, creeping, creeping until he can reach the volleyball sitting up on all these briars. And he's like, I got it, dude.

SPEAKER_03

Doesn't this sound like a great plan?

SPEAKER_00

I got it, dude. Back up. I go put it in reverse in four-wheel drive, and the back tires spin, and the front tires don't do anything. And I'm like, what in the world? You didn't lock the hubs. I didn't lock the hubs. In this old OJ brought, you had to get out and physically manually lock the front hubs, and I had failed to do that, and we were stuck. I'm shocked that you left out of step. I know it's hard to believe.

SPEAKER_02

Much attention to detail.

SPEAKER_00

So now all my friends are having a laugh at me, which is so unusual. Yeah and uh they're they're having a good time. And about that time, some pump pulls up in a small Toyota Tacoma. And he was like, Does that Ford need to get pulled out?

SPEAKER_04

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And he was reveling in it. I was like, I hate to admit it, but DeFord doesn't, but I do. It wasn't DeFord's fault. It was my fault. So he he pulled us out, and he was so he he just loved it. He had a big time.

SPEAKER_03

He's still talking about it.

SPEAKER_00

He's still talking about the time he pulled out to OJ Bronco from the Briars at Hampton Green Apartments. But yeah, so Lincoln and I got in all kinds of uh vehicular trouble. But no cops were called, no cuffs were uh administered, so we were we were we were ahead of Daniel.

SPEAKER_03

That parking lot, yeah, you're ahead of me. That parking lot story um brings me to my my next two. So I had a perfect driving record all the way through high school. I have had a perfect driving record for the most part, I think maybe one ticket twenty something years ago after college.

SPEAKER_01

I appreciate that you take pride in that. You've been arrested twice, and you can take it if you don't drive.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, but all right, well, there was a period while I was at Clemson. So after the snow incident, shortly thereafter, I had um well it was probably a couple years after, I had the most difficult class I've ever had at Clemson was experimental statistics. My professor was Chinese, and if he had been speaking perfect English, I would not have understood a thing he said. But what he was saying in broken Chinese experimental like Bubba. Yes, pretty much. But I was lost. And it was one of those classes you didn't What did it sound like, Daniel, when he talked? Oh I c I couldn't even try to replicate. But it it was a foreign language to me. And I I was struggling. I was trying to find a way to make it pay attention. And I mean, we had more letters than numbers in this math, right?

SPEAKER_00

So letters are difficult.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, a lot of letters. A lot of letters. Uh Clemson is a little tricky sometimes. Yeah, I get it.

SPEAKER_00

Hey, they get excited when they get spelled Clemson at the football game. Yeah, every time.

SPEAKER_03

Hey, we practice a lot, okay? All right. So I I stay up all night studying for this exam. I gotta pass this exam. I gotta do well to keep my scholarship and stay in and pressure zone. So I stay up all night studying, and it's time to go. It's it's go time. I'm leaving the apartment. I've got to go take this exam. I'm leaving a little bit early. Um, make sure I'm not late, you know. It's it's time to do it. So I jump in my truck like I always did. I had a 94 Z71 with big tires on it at this point. I'd gotten rid of the Toyota. What? Yep. Mm-hmm. Okay. It has a bench seat, so I throw my arm over the right side bench seat and I look behind me, because we didn't have cameras back then, you know. No. I look behind me and there's nothing behind me, and I throw her in reverse and I hit the gas and I hear that telltale stomach drop sound of glass breaking and sheet metal crunching.

SPEAKER_01

Who do you think has heard that sound more at this table than anybody else? Stephen Dinkins.

SPEAKER_03

He knows that's to happen. He's looking around. But Steven has quite had quite a few fender benders. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Reverse is not his friend.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yes. Yes. Mailboxes are not his friend either at all. You had to love the invention of the backup camera.

SPEAKER_02

A man in a room of his own mailbox. I mean, that don't help. I can't tell you not, man.

SPEAKER_03

You still gotta look at the keyboard. So so at this point, so at this point in the story, I know I've messed up. I'm on the way to the biggest exam I've got, and I've just gotten in an accident. But what do you do? At this point, I pull, I put it in drive and I pull back forward into the parking spot, and um I get out and I open my door and my stomach drops. Because what is parked six inches behind my truck, except for a Clemson Police Department police car. Okay, and my big trailer hitch on this truck has touched roughly somewhere in the earlobe area of this police officer as it went through his window. He was parked sideways sitting in the car directly behind my truck. Oh my goodness. And when I'm spot. Well, when I look back, I'm looking over the car. I didn't, there was nothing to see. What about when you like climbed in the when I climbed in, he wasn't there. Uh he pulled up.

SPEAKER_02

This is clearly his fault.

SPEAKER_03

Clearly, nobody told no siren parked sideways behind me. But I have put the trailer hitch. No, no, it is this is becoming a recurring theme. And uh I I'm not sure I've ever had the stomach drop feeling any worse than that. My exam pressure's on. This officer has a trailer hitch through his window right into his cheek, earlobe area, and uh, he's not happy about it. You know, I've screwed up his car, he can't so anyway, he gets out, writes me whatever kind of tickets you get for hitting somebody in the parking lot, and um he was gracious enough to get me out of there and get me still to my exam to explain to him my situation. But that was a rough one. That was I really, I really think that's his fault.

SPEAKER_02

I'm gonna be honest with you.

SPEAKER_03

I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_02

I'm on Team Daniel there.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, you can't park there. I mean, exactly.

SPEAKER_01

It's not a parking spot.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, if if somebody's having a heart attack or getting murdered or whatever and the lights are on, then you can park anywhere you want. But if you just sit in there to write tickets or whatever it is you do in your police car, you wouldn't think six inches behind my trailer hook hitch would be the place to be.

SPEAKER_02

So I'm right there with you. I mean, and and I I had an experience being and just not your fault. Just like it was not my fault, this was kind of Kim's fault and the lady I hit her's fault, actually. Well, it's not let me explain. So we are at Ocean Isle Beach, and we've been enjoying the beach and everything, but it's time to go home. And Kim wants to stay on the beach a little bit longer. So the kids, they wanted some lunch. I said, Well, come on, Kim, let's go get lunch and we go home. Well, no, I want to stay on the beach. So I said, Okay, I'll take the kids to go get lunch. So we get in the car and we go eat lunch or whatever, and come back, and I call Kim on the phone. I'm like, meet us, meet us at the pier, and we'll pick you up and we'll load up and head on back. So I meet her at the pier and I pull in a parking spot directly across from me at the front door of the to go in the pier, and that's a big old no parking sign. I mean, directly across from me. And so Kim comes, we load up stuff in the car, I jump in the car, everything's good. Kids have had lunch, Kim's had an extra time on the beach, everything's good. I throw it in the verse. I mean, of course there's nothing behind me because there's a no-parking sign behind me, right? And lo and behold, a lady in a Volvo had pulled up right behind in the no parking sign, and I just hit her right, she parked sideways, hit her right in the back rear quarter panel, the trailer hit, go through the quarter panel. When I pull off, it pulled the quarter panel off. It's hanging on your tongue. Yes, all it's hung on the ball. I'm like, this is not good. And so did you show her the sign? And the police come and they they they write me a ticket. I mean, she's in a no-parking sign. That's not my fault. I mean, once again, a victim, Danny. I feel it. I feel your pain. I was a victim just like you and wrongly accused. Did you tell them you were a lawyer? I did not. It might have worked. I'm like, I'm gonna fight this, and I did not say I'm gonna fight it. I just paid it, and it was what it was.

SPEAKER_01

And but I mean, nobody whatever a ticket is for backing into a car in the parking lot.

SPEAKER_02

Whatever it was, exactly, Danny. Whatever that is, we were able to get on with it. But of course, I did blame it on Kim because it's never our fault. I was like, Kim, if you'd have just come, we I'd had to come back here to pick you up. And so anyway, bless Kim's hearts. He had listened to me blaming on somebody.

SPEAKER_00

Could I interject a uh an African uh traffic incident story? Absolutely. These are the best cats. Kill it all, brother. We uh it goes in line with your parking problems, but uh I had a good friend named Dave Brower. Dave was a little bit older than me, and Dave had been in a traumatic vehicular accident, and he didn't like to drive in Nairobi because driving in Nairobi is like a sport. It is a sport, is it is ridiculous. There are no rules, and the cops are often corrupt, and it is just the loudest horn wind, right?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, and um sounds like a place you're driving with fit and will. I actually excelled.

SPEAKER_00

And uh so he said, Stephen, we're going to this area called Penguin, and he said, Uh, do you would you mind driving? I said, No, I'll I'll drive. He said, I don't mind using my car, but if you'll drive it, I said, sure. Uh oh. He wasn't comfortable driving, but he was comfortable with Stephen. He doesn't have the same experience that y'all have had. He's on the obligation to be like, so I wasn't afraid. It's like, sure, let's go. So we hop in. So we're driving, and traffic's bad, and um, we finally get to this little shopping center where we're going to, and I it's just it's impossible for me to describe shopping center because you think American shopping center, but this is a Kenyan shopping center in a rough part of town, and there are people just everywhere, like ants on a fire ant mound. I mean, it is they're just everywhere. And they there's a uh, you know, in New York you might have hot dog stands. In Nairobi, they'll have these little um sausage and egg stands, and they they cart them around and they sell you a little piece of sausage and or a boiled egg, and uh, they got these glass cases, these little boxes on glass on wheels, and they're pushing that around.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, I think I see what you see.

SPEAKER_02

So I wonder how that would fit with Lincoln's stomach. I'm trying to get it. You mean to buy four stomach? That would sit with Lincoln. So it's all done a bald egg. Okay, go ahead. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00

And this sausage is not a good sausage. So I'm trying to pull into this parking lot of this shopping center, but people are everywhere. And on one side are people, and on the other side is this guy with the glass cart. And so he's on Dave's side. So I'm driving on the right hand side of the car, he's on the left hand, and he's the guy with the glass cart is on the left side. And uh, I'm trying to ease forward, ease forward, and I'm waiting for the people to step, ease forward, step. And he's like, Steven, I think you're gonna hit the glass cart. I was like, I got it. I ease forward. He's like, I think you're gonna hit it. I was like, I got it. I just need this guy to move and I'm gonna move over a little bit more. And that guy moved, and I ease forward a little bit more. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye, I saw that glass cart tipping over to the left, and it tips over and it hits, and when it hits, all four panes explode. Bye-bye eggs, bye-bye sausage. Sausage, you name it. And Dave was a little bit uncomfortable with the crowds too. He was new to Africa. I had been there for 10 years at this point, and he's very nervous because there's a big crowd, and everybody now gathers around. I hope you're Dave's boss because at this point I'm probably looking at you going, I told you you were gonna be in the car. Dave and I were getting it was swell. So at this point, Dave's not as mad at me as he is scared of the crowd. So I was like, Dave, lock the doors. I got this. Yeah, lock the doors. Because I've been dependable up until now.

SPEAKER_03

So I got just like I told you last time. I got hush, let me know.

SPEAKER_02

Hold on. Can you give me some Kenyan? Like, dude, you like tell me what you said him in Kenyan.

SPEAKER_00

To him, I was talking to him in English. He was American. He was American, so I'm talking to him in English. Now I do get out and have to talk to Swahili to the guy who cart I have knocked over, who's picking up the glass pieces. And uh he is just going crazy uh at me. He he's understandably upset. And I was like, I'm sorry, I'm gonna replay me what it's like. Poly sauna is what you'd say in Swahili to say, I'm sorry. And sauna is very, so I'm very sorry. Polisana, poly sauna, poly sauna. Um, I did not mean to poly poly poly, solar, poly poly, poly sauna. And so uh actually poly poly is slow. I should have been going poly poly, but and maybe I wouldn't have hit him. So he immediately, though, and this is kind of a Kenyan thing, he immediately gives me a number that is astronomical to fix his glass on his repair card. And they're a little of these glasses. We're moving into negotiations very quickly. Oh, very quickly. That's I mean, that's at Kenya, a traffic accident is nothing more than negotiation immediately. And so I was like, I'm gonna make this right, it's my fault. He's like, Yeah, this is 20,000 shillings, which would be about 200 bucks. And I know I could buy all that glass for about $3.50, about 100 yards away at a glass shop. And I was like, no, I'm not doing that. And then somebody else tells me, Well, that was my cart. He was just pushing it, and they want money. And I said, No, that was actually my cart. And no, no kidding, they're all trying to shake me down. And I'm like, and now I'm arguing with them, and their price is a little bit better than his price. So I'm kind of liking that. And finally, I was like, I'm not dealing with anybody else. Y'all move out of the way. I'm gonna go there, I'm gonna park, and we'll deal with it there. But right here, it's a scene, and I'm holding up traffic. So I get in the car and I just kind of keep moving forward and they part. How's poor Dave doing at this point? Dave is kind of getting shakes. And I so I get in and I slam the door, and I was like, David, you won't believe that first guy, he was trying to, he was trying to mess with me. He wanted to charge 20,000 shillings. He was crazy, crazy. And Dave, I look over at Dave, and Dave's like, I was like, Dave, you alright? He was like, So I turned around and looked, and the guy got in the back seat.

SPEAKER_01

But he didn't speak English, right? So you were good.

SPEAKER_00

He was bug enough to know how he was crazy. Oh, that's hilarious.

SPEAKER_02

Dave did not listen and lock the door like you told him to.

SPEAKER_00

Dave did not lock the door. Oh, the man's in the back seat. So he got into the back seat and he heard me talk about how crazy he was. And so then we pulled up to the park spot and we worked it out, and I gave him probably double what I needed to, but I had to make it right. So it was a good deal. But Dave, Dave didn't ask me to drive a whole lot more.

SPEAKER_03

That was the end of that. That was kind of the end of the show. All of a sudden he got more comfortable with driving. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

All of a sudden, you gotta break him in, Daniel. You gotta make him feel like that. You build him up.

SPEAKER_02

That was that was just a classic thing to build him up right now. I like it.

SPEAKER_00

Right here. Master class. Okay, so Daniel, I I don't think we've gotten to the bottom of your list over there. I think I see a lot of people.

SPEAKER_03

No, so I've got that was Officer Wreck number one.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Like jail trip number one, jail trip number two.

SPEAKER_02

Now we've got Officer Wreck number two.

SPEAKER_03

So not too terribly long after this, I'm coming down uh 123 in Clemson, right in front of the main Clemson police station, which is kind of down a hill, and I've got an officer in front of me. And uh I don't know if his I don't know if his uh partner forgot something at the station or what happened, but he locks the brakes down to turn into that entrance, and my big old truck is not gonna stop that fast.

SPEAKER_01

So I'm uh that Toyota would have that.

SPEAKER_03

It it probably would have, but I chev'd like mm mm. So I hit the brakes best I can, and next thing I know, bam, right into the back of the police car. And all that's going through my mind is dear lord, please do not let that man that I just backed through his window step out of his car. I'm thinking they I'm starting to earn a reputation here in town, and they think I'm coming for them at some point. So thankfully, it's a different police officer, and this one goes better than the one before. I think he did realize that he had hammered on his brakes pretty hard, although it was still my fault. I mean, he had a contributing factor to it. So that was my officer one and officer two, thank goodness was not the same officer in that situation.

SPEAKER_02

So so probably unbeknownst to us at the the Clemson Police Department was Daniel's mugshot on their computer. He was a screensaver before he was a screensaver. Exactly.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, uh all bets are off around this man. Idiot. When Steven starts bringing out the screensaver stuff, I mean there's other stories we can go into, like the cell phone story. I mean, that one's gonna talk about that one.

SPEAKER_00

I would love to hear the story. I have not heard the cell phone story.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, I wasn't gonna talk about the cell phone story.

SPEAKER_00

Can I be honest? It's not that good of a story. We should probably move on.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, it's one of them stories if it's not a good story, it's just because I didn't tell it right. Because if y'all were there, you'd have wet your britches laughing at this guy.

SPEAKER_01

I think I've heard the story, and I think our listeners would appreciate him.

SPEAKER_03

They would appreciate the story. And and I if I remember correctly, this was the brainchild of Jay Davis, but I was an active participant and it wasn't just competition, it was also pranks within the office. Constant pranks within the office. And Stephen, I know this will be shocking to y'all, but Stephen tended to lose things occasionally. Forget where they were? Forget where they were. Actually, he if he were like a uh a video game character, he'd had a special move. And the special move was called the front, back front. And we had patented it. It was a Stephen move. Anytime we'd go to lunch, Stephen wallet keys. No, Stephen would do, he would we would get up there to pay, and Stephen was very generous. If he had his wallet, he would pay for your lunch a lot of times. But he very rarely ever had his wallet. So we would generally get to the front of the line and he would go front, back, front. Oh my gosh, guys, I forgot my wallet. One of y'all got some extra cash to pay for my lunch.

SPEAKER_00

It happened like twice in ten years, sure. You know, just within one day.

SPEAKER_03

That's why we came up with a name that happened once.

SPEAKER_01

But so Sniffles.

SPEAKER_03

The only thing Sniffles forgot more often or lost more often in the wallet was the cell phone. And this was early days of iPhones. Like we all started at Cornstone, we had cell phones.

SPEAKER_01

If you think about it.

SPEAKER_03

Blackberry. Did you have a blackberry?

SPEAKER_01

He had to keep up with keys and a wallet already. Now you throw a third thing in the mix.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, it ain't gonna happen. It just gonna happen. You're gonna forget one of them, surely.

SPEAKER_00

That's one we all have weaknesses. I don't know that we need to exploit this one any further.

SPEAKER_03

So we're all we that we're all new to iPhones. We're learning how to use them. You've got all these alerts, you've got, you know, emails buzzing through, you've got things that make make noise. So Jay and I find Steven's cell phone in some completely random location. Right. I don't even remember where it was. But I mean bathroom, refrigerator, wherever it may have been, this was a common thing. And Jay's like, this is ridiculous. We gotta do something about this. And uh so we came up with the idea, and Jay came up with the idea. We were gonna hide his cell phone. But even better yet, we went in his office and pushed up a ceiling tile and put that cell phone on top of the ceiling tile. I love it. And before we did, this was the key. So the critical point was you had to turn the volume down real low. We didn't turn it off, but we turned it down very low. So Steven starts looking for the cell phone and and we go back to our daily work day. We me and Jay like nothing happened. So I'm in my office. Jay goes down to demons. Like when he did. And I mean this was this deserved a Grammy for what was going on because Steven keeps going up and down the hallway looking for his cell phone, and we know what he's looking for, but he hasn't said anything yet. At some point he gets frustr frustrated and begins asking. Jay, have you seen my cell phone? Daniel, have you seen my cell phone? And uh he keeps asking and keeps asking, he can't find it anywhere. And um then he comes in and he's like, Guys, I really I can't find my cell phone. Will you call my cell phone or text? I don't know, we were texting at that point, and we're sending messages to the cell phone and he starts hearing it. But he can't tell where it is. So it was the faintest noise you could hear to the point where your sense of direction was useless. Right. So he is in this office, and I'm gonna tell you what, he turned it upside down. I mean, he had been through every drawer, he'd been through every box. Another tank, please. So this has gone on and on. Jay and I keep going back to working, and what what working looks like for Jay and I is we keep a straight face as long as we can to get around the corner into our offices, and we are dying. And uh what I mean the climax of this story was I go down to Jay's office and we're just losing it. I mean, with all we can do to keep it together while Stephen, he's been looking for like hours at this point, right? And we come walking back down because we need another look, right? Every few minutes you need another look to check on this situation. And we come down the hallway, and what is Stephen doing, but he's got a model of Tylenol out, and he's taking some, he's gotten so frustrated, he's got made himself get a headache, and we saw the house.

SPEAKER_00

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Y'all gave me a headache.

SPEAKER_03

I didn't get myself in the case. So this was one of the greatest pranks ever. I mean, it went on for hours until I think you did you finally found the phone?

SPEAKER_00

We started dragging furniture into the hallway to get it out of the office. I could see was it in the furniture or was it not? Because I can still hear this thing like me then like in a crack. Right.

SPEAKER_03

So the only way to determine if it was in the crack was to move all the furniture. So at this point, we start helping Steven move all the furniture. So Steven's on one side, I'm on the other, Jay's on the other, whatever. We're taking file cabinets. We're taking this thing just keeps growing. I mean, it's grown past the point we ever thought it would grow.

SPEAKER_00

We would be like carrying it out, and you'd hear beep beep.

SPEAKER_03

Did y'all hear it? Where was that? So at the at the point he finally finds his cell phone, literally there's nothing in his office, looks like the day it was constructed. There is nothing in the office whatsoever. Everything's in the hallway. Everybody that comes to the office, the ladies in the office are like, What in the world is going on? Are we moving out? Did we forget to pay the rent? You know. Oh man.

SPEAKER_00

It was terrible. Uh the the most embarrassing part about the story for me is not that I lost my phone because that whatever, I do that a lot. Um, but is that it took me that long to figure out it was these dingolangs that had taken advantage of me, but my disability. Like, I mean if you saw a guy in a wheelchair, would you go like somehow make fun of him and do something? Speed bump in his voice. Yeah, would you do that? You wouldn't do it. No, you wouldn't do that. But to me, they'd do it.

SPEAKER_03

I would put his cell phone in the ceiling. I'd tell you that. Don't we do that? It was awful. Who needs enemies, right? Exactly. Oh, that one's a classic one. So man.

SPEAKER_00

Well, you tell you tell that story, but you're not gonna tell the story about the time I beat you in the race in the parking garage at the beach.

SPEAKER_03

I mean, we can tell that story.

SPEAKER_00

I got video evidence of that somewhere.

SPEAKER_01

We can tell that story. Once we tell that story, I'd like to circle back to the uh turkey hunt competition and get Daniel's version of what went down between you and Lincoln and him and Stephen DeShamps.

SPEAKER_00

If you think that Daniel Andrews is above shooting buckshot, you're mistaken.

SPEAKER_03

So the funniest part about that story, Scott, was Stephen DeShamps' expression on his face when the bird came out of Stephen's mouth. Or when he was tipped off the shot was involved, it was like the most shocking revelation you've ever seen. I mean, he was floored. And Stephen was having none of it. And he lit into SLD over there about this shot.

SPEAKER_00

You'd have thought that he found out that I was hunting on crack cocaine laced with LSD.

SPEAKER_01

Well, to a sportsman, that kind of is the same thing. Stephen DeShamp has not been in prison twice. I can tell you that. Yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no, no. Stephen, Stephen is rule following. Uh jail, not prison, but you know.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I didn't go to prison. Right. Just jail. I did learn the difference between the two at that point. And you didn't want to go to prison? No bars here, it's a lot of doors. A lot of locks. That's a lot of locks. Great now. So the race. Yeah. The race. So the race is on. Stephen, um, he never backs down from challenge, and we were at the beach um for a company get together where we were we were looking in planning for the year. The working year.

SPEAKER_00

We were setting and whatnot.

SPEAKER_03

And as I'm as I remember, weren't we in like khakis and like lace up dress shoes? Stephen was wearing tennis shoes.

SPEAKER_00

No, I'd be him in love for something.

SPEAKER_03

He's just coming from softball. Softball.

SPEAKER_02

He's just been a softball gangster. Let me tell you. Khakki's and his tennis shoes, he's he's playing softball. Cut his mic off. So so when you when you Exactly. When you're dealing with a matter of fact, if we had a camera, please stand up, Steve. You you would be perfect right now for this. This is Steven's softball advantage. This is what you wear to softball. He could go straight from the softball field to the skateboard park with his bands on. He'd be perfect.

SPEAKER_03

So at some point in this whole meeting, Stephen's come up with the idea that we're a race in in our loafers, in our dress shoes and clothes. And I give it to Stephen. He is crafty. Okay, so when he comes up with the race, he makes all the rules.

SPEAKER_01

He knows how to cheat. That's what that means. Yes, basically. He's crafty.

SPEAKER_03

Cheating or what you want to call crafty better. Let's go. What you want to call it. But Stephen sets the rules and the race is going to happen inside a parking garage. And it's about from here to the corner of that wall right there. So I think Stephen had determined in his in his mind, all right, if I keep this thing really short and I get a good jump, I got a good shot, right? Well, so we we he determines we're going to one of the pillars in the parking garage, which is like not close to 40 yards. I'm we're talking like 20, 30, 10. 18 yard deck. It's close.

SPEAKER_01

How do you get a jump in a race?

SPEAKER_03

So as I remember, I think Stephen was the one that says go. So that's the real good way to get a jump in a race. I mean so I realized very quickly that Stephen has gotten a jump on me stacked the deck. He has stacked the deck and he has the the inside, and I've got 18 yards to catch up with.

SPEAKER_01

People wonder why I had a temper problem as a child.

SPEAKER_03

So you see where I'm coming from here. You know how this works. So as I remember it, we remember this differently. I did catch up with Stephen in the race and pass him at the end, but he would contend that he was ahead of me. That he beat me to the pillar. Yeah. And and the video evidence was it have you ever seen that video of Bigfoot? The one from 1967 or whatever where he's that's about what Steven's video of the race looks like. It's conclusive. It's undeniable evidence. I can tell you what, we had a good time back then.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, back in the day. That was true. We had a good time. Tuesday morning sales meetings never disappointed.

SPEAKER_03

Oh yeah. You were going you were gonna get some laughs then in the sales meeting.

SPEAKER_00

Usually the question that Stephen DeShant was without to start off with is what animal died at your house this week, Stephen.

SPEAKER_03

That was on my on my list here with Stephen's Oodle. Now I can't remember what kind of oodle it was, but he had when he first said that he and Sarah were considering getting some form of oodle, I told him that he shouldn't do it. And he went against my advice, and the dog was the spawn of Satan himself.

SPEAKER_00

I I agree with that. That's the truth. That's a thousand percent true.

SPEAKER_03

We would sit there just before what died, that was a different dog. This was the oodle was shortly before that, as I remember. And he tore up their entire house. Everything I remember Sprinkler System. Sprinkler System. I remember um Which house was it?

SPEAKER_02

Was it Purdy Street or Salem? Purdy Street. Purdy Street.

SPEAKER_03

I remember that Purdy Street. Yeah, he the dog. The dog tore up the flower girl dress went all the way to Kenny's car wash down the road, I believe.

SPEAKER_00

Oh Mark Galloway drove by that morning and said it looked like Marty Gry in my front yard.

SPEAKER_03

The dog tore up the family Bible. The dog ate the family Bible. Wasn't that right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, he did. He sure did. It was terrible. And the worst part about that story is we paid some ridiculous amount of money for this mutt, right? And uh it turns out he's a spawn of Satan, as Daniel said. And I came home one day. Who was it who turned you on to the doodles? Do you remember? Yeah, I do. It was my sister-in-law. And I love her, but I have not completely forgiven her for this yet. So that's some bad blood. And uh so I I finally have enough. I was like, Sarah, we're getting rid of this dog. We can't keep this dog any longer. It's just, it is horrendous. And she's like, Well, you just uh okay, well, today's a good day because I'm mad at you, so let's just do something. And I was like, all right, I'm I'm gonna take that. I'm gone. Take that opportunity, buddy. I'm like, I grabbed the dog up and I'm heading to the car, and I throw the car in the backseat. I throw the dog in the backseat of the car, and I'm about to peel out of the driveway. And she's like, Hold on, hold on, hold on. Can we at least call the kennel where we where we got him? And let's see if they'll take him back. And I said, You get one call. It's like she was in jail. I said, You get one call. So she calls the lady, and this is the what I hear. Hey, this is Sarah. We got that Labradoodle from you two months ago, blah, blah, blah. And um, it's not working out, and he's chewing up a bunch of stuff, and my husband wants to get rid of him. And I wanted to see if y'all would take him back. And I'm like, listening. And then Sarah goes, No, no, no, you don't need to give us our money back. And I was like, give me the phone. Give me the phone. I was like, we need to get our money back. She's like, Well, you can't get your money back. And I was like, Okay, deal. But but you'll take it back? She's like, Yeah, I'll be there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Deal. Deal. Sold negotiate right now.

SPEAKER_00

Sold, done.

SPEAKER_02

Uh now that you mentioned the whole Purdy Street house and everything, it was kind of a tricky gateway there, wasn't it? There was a very tricky gateway. White c white brick columns or something there. How did that how'd that turn out for for y'all in the driving? Oh gosh.

SPEAKER_00

Uh there was a time. A long time ago. And this this is not me, this is Sarah. Back in the day. I don't think I ran into those columns. Um, but I had bought Sarah a new suburban. And uh very proud of that, and she loved it. And her dad had passed away, but before he had passed away, he had given her a nice watch that she very much loved. And um she was walking, our daughter Rain, who's 25 now, gonna be 25, and uh she's walking her at one or two years old through the neighborhood, and she takes that watch off because it was bothering her. She set it on top of the what do you call those things? Uh stroller, thank you. And um, she gets back from her walk and she goes to put it back on, it's not there, and it has fallen off somewhere in her walk. So in a panic, she jumps into suburban and backs out the driveway, gives me the the the the baby, Rainey, and the stroller, and she, I gotta go look for it. I'm gonna retrace my steps. And she puts it in reverse and she rears back in reverse and she scrapes that suburban from one corner from the back corner panel to the front quarter panel along that white eight by eight newly painted white post. She's got a Darlington stripe. A Darlington stripe all the way down the side. And I was like, Oh my gosh, are you kidding me? So she laments that for just a moment, then she peels out and goes looking for the watch. Can't find a watch. Can't find a watch. Two days, three days, four days, no watch. And we're like, man, she's she is sick about this watch that her dad had given her because he died very unexpectedly. It was a great man, and they had a sweet relationship, and she was just very upset. So we started praying, Lord, you know, this it would be a big deal. Please, if there's a way somehow we can find this watch, come across this watch. Or our good friends, uh Kathleen Noonan, her mother, lives downtown and had found the watch and was showing it to Kathleen. And Kathleen said, Mama, that's Sarah's watch. Sarah's lost her watch. She's been looking for that watch.

SPEAKER_02

And so she said, Don't tell her I found it.

SPEAKER_00

We'll hide it in the ceiling. She was very gracious, and uh, and Kathleen brought the watch back. And Sarah's like, Man, the Lord answers prayers. He is so good. I've got this watch. And I said, That is really good. I'm so glad we got a watch. Could you pray about that suburban? Could you say the Lord get that dog stripe off my stuff?

SPEAKER_03

So I got a Purdy Street story too about Steve. I don't know if he remembers this one.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, this is a good one. This isn't necessarily embarrassing. You already said in a while. I remember it. Okay.

SPEAKER_03

So I go to the Y in the mornings early. So I wake up early. I'm a 4 30 guy, so I get up early. But and Stephen and I talk every day back then, but usually not that early. So I get a call from SLD early. I don't know, 5 o'clock in the morning, 5 30 in the morning.

SPEAKER_00

I might be thinking of a different story.

SPEAKER_03

And uh anyway, Stephen calls me and says, Can you come over here? I was like, Well, what do you need? And he says, I got something in my wall. Oh, it wasn't. I have a creature in my wall. And I said, Well, what kind of creature? I don't know, but it's clawing all night long. It's been clawing on my wall. And it is it's like a vicious creature of some sort. It is trying to claw its way into the house.

SPEAKER_00

I thought it was a lizard man who had come over from Skateboard. Pretty much crawled up in my bathroom.

SPEAKER_03

Pretty much. And he said he'd been trying all night to convince Sarah that it was nothing to worry about, and she'd been up all night long and there wasn't no sleeping going on in their house.

SPEAKER_00

She kept saying, I think that's a rat. And in my mind, so I mean he might know how to handle it. He might know.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, Bishopville, a lizard man. That's right. Alright, so I'm at I get back to my house and I'm trying to think, all right, well, how did I handle a creature in the wall? So the best thing I could come up with was I had growing up, I shot a ton. I had a 22-caliber pellet rifle. So I said, Well, I can't shoot with a scope on it. Yep, with a scope on it. That was a nasty gun. Yeah, it was sweet. It was awesome. But you can't, I couldn't shoot a gun on Purdy Street or the neighbor's gonna call the cops and it's gonna be a big scene. And then I was thinking But you're you've been there. Uh-huh. Good point. Good point. I mean we'd have been comfortable with it, right? So I come up with this, and then I was like, well, the other problem is if we kill a creature in Stephen's wall, it's gonna stink up Stephen and Sarah's house for like three months. So how do we how do we get the creature to send the wall? So I get these big gloves. I don't know if they were waiter gloves or work gloves or what they were. So I get these big old gloves. So I got my gloves and my my um 22-caliber pellet rifle heading to Steven's house, and we get there. And he in his wall in his bedroom, he had a panel that at some point somebody had repaired something or whatever, but his panel would pull off.

SPEAKER_00

Well, on the other side of the wall was an old ceramic bathtub. The bathtub was in the other room. So this was the you know panel to get into the uh faucet fixtures for the tub.

SPEAKER_03

Right.

SPEAKER_00

But to keep this in mind, that tub, those ceramic tubs were basically hollow, right? So they're like steel or ceramic coated, but they're hollow in the channels where the sides are and around to the back. So keep so we open that panel up.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, so we get there and we're all ready, you know, but we got to figure out what we got. So we kind of peel it back. We're trying to evaluate the situation before we dive in full fledged, right?

SPEAKER_01

That's like any good. Yeah, plum.

SPEAKER_03

So we peel this thing back, and the most vicious man-eaten possum has got, I mean, this joker's got some fangs.

SPEAKER_00

This possum is sitting on a pipe right behind this panel, going to Stephen's the ugliest looking possum, the meanest looking possum.

SPEAKER_03

Stephen pulls that thing back, slams it back real quick. Okay, that's what we got. And he don't look real happy to be there. So we've come up with the strategy that we're going to next time we pull this panel, we are going to shoot the possum in the head and then find a way to grab the possum before he falls down where we can't get him and stinks for three months. And we pulled this if we pulled this trick off basically like SEAL team 6.

SPEAKER_01

I mean it was What was Steven's role in this plan?

SPEAKER_03

Oh, be pulling the board back? I mean, he was great emotional support, positive mental attitude. I mean, it's very positive in this situation. He he did help pull the board back. And um as I remember, the shot went right forehead into the possum, and we were able to grab that thing out of there and pull the bloody possum out of Purdy Street without incident.

SPEAKER_00

Well, I remember close to the same. Except we were worried about him falling down and us not being able to get to him because there was a hole where he'd come up through. But I remember that we did shoot him and he went into the death through death rows, baby. And he started flopping as Bubba. And he started going past the pipe, but into like the hollowed out portion of that ceramic tub and was quickly gonna get out of reach. And if he got away of it, that was gonna be bad. It was gonna be bad. But we were able to uh I think Daniel would do his welding gloves or whatever he had, was able to like get in that wall up to his shoulder and grab him and pull him back out while he was still squirming.

SPEAKER_03

There was a legit concern of a rotting possum being in the in a spot we couldn't get to for a while. For a while.

SPEAKER_00

He stunk alive. He stunked bad. I don't know how bad he's gonna smell if we did, yeah, if we didn't uh make it.

SPEAKER_03

But he was a man-eater, Stephen.

SPEAKER_00

A man eater. That's what he sounded like in the middle of the night. I can tell you that.

SPEAKER_02

He was as you convinced there's no problem.

SPEAKER_00

Nothing to see here. But Sarah's like, I think it's a rat. And in my mind I'm thinking, I ain't a rat. It's way bigger than a rat. That's an imposter. That's what that is. All right, Daniel. Man, I feel like we're still getting started, but we're just we're an hour into this podcast. So we're gonna wrap it up. But we thank you for coming on. These have been fantastic stories. Look forward to having you on again. We're gonna bring Chad along. We're gonna hear more about this infamous legendary Mr. Chuck. We're gonna hear some more about Chuck the Knife. Chuck the knife. We look forward to having him on. Well, having y'all on to talk more about him. But uh, it's always an honor. It's been a great episode. We got more episodes coming that are gonna be great. Some other guests lined up. So uh all our listeners out there, thank you for listening. Hang in there with us. Uh, we're gonna transition to a word segment with Scott, the pony boy, and then we look forward to being with you on another Mostly Legal Monday.

SPEAKER_03

Oh well, thank you, David. Thank you guys. Enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_01

Welcome back to our word segment. I uh want to talk for just a minute about a passage that we're working through uh in my sermon series currently at Chapin Prez. Uh, it's from 1 Samuel 17. I'm walking through the book of 1 Samuel, and 1 Samuel 17 is a super familiar passage if you've ever heard the story of David and Goliath. And the verse that I, one of the verses I love in this story is uh verse 47, when David's actually face to face with Goliath right before they go to battle, and he is calling Goliath out for his blaspheming uh against the Lord, the God of the armies of Israel. And he says this in verse 47, he says, that all this assembly may know that the Lord saves not with sword and spear. And uh there's so much you could talk about in this passage, and um, I did it on Sunday, but this verse where David kind of indirectly makes this bold faith claim that the Lord saves really strikes you. The Lord is the one who does all of the work in salvation, he is the one that brings us to a place of faith and hope in Jesus Christ. The Lord does it all so that he gets all the glory, so that he's not sharing his glory with another. Um, any work that I do for the kingdom, any gospel proclamation that I make, it's still the Lord using that truth that I speak or that anybody speaks. It's the Lord who is putting it in my heart and in my life to go and do that work. It's the Lord that's giving me the words to say, it's the Lord that's putting the people that he wants to hear what I'm saying in that place at that time. It's the Lord who is sovereignly working in these ways to bring about saving faith in anybody so that he alone gets the glory. David's saying to Goliath, hey, the Lord's gonna save, and he's not gonna do it by all your techniques, by all your um weapon. Henry, by all your strength, by all your intimidation, the Lord's gonna save in ways that only He does, only He can. And so that's what He did through David. And of course, you know the rest of the story. But the point I want to emphasize is that the Lord has saved me. If He has saved you, He did the work. So give Him the glory for it. Remember His goodness towards you and your salvation. And then remember if you've got friends, neighbors, family members that you're praying for that you want to see come to know Christ, then pray. Pray that the Lord who saves, because He alone does, would show them His grace and mercy and save them, would bring them to a place of understanding, of faith in Jesus Christ's finished work. Because ultimately He's the only one who can do it. He's the only one who saves. Have a great week and remember that God is sovereign in all these things. So run to Him in prayer. We'll talk to you soon.

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