Faith and Fertility | Percy White Jr. | vEP.16

Buzzsprout Description:
In Episode 16 of Founder Fumbles, Dahmari Taplin sits down with Percy White Jr.—media director, minister, and author of Unshaken.

Percy shares his journey through infertility, how it challenged his identity as a man and believer, and what it means to trust God even when prayers go unanswered.

This episode is for anyone navigating pressure, uncertainty, or a season where faith feels stretched.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back to another episode of Founder Fumbles where we talk about real life entrepreneur struggles and comeback strategies. I'm your host, Damari Taplin, and today we have a media director, minister, and author of the book Unshaken. Ladies and gentlemen, we have Percy Wright. Good afternoon, Amari. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Very happy to have you. And where are you from?

SPEAKER_01 0:23

I am from Greensboro, North Carolina, originally from Lexington, North Carolina, which is not too far from Greensboro. It's known for barbecue. So I don't know if you ever heard of that Lexington Barbecue Festival or whatever, but yeah, that's what we're most famous for. And Greensboro being the home of North Carolina AT State University, Aggie Pride homecoming. So that's where I am right now.

SPEAKER_00 0:47

Okay. No, I haven't heard of the barbecue thing he was telling me about. That's in North Carolina, you say.

SPEAKER_01 0:53

Correct.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

Hey, I got a friend that just moved out there. I'll tell him about it and maybe he'll, you know, he'll join. So what do you what do you do for fun out there in North Carolina outside of you know what you do for work and business?

SPEAKER_01 1:05

Oh well, my wife and I, we love to travel. Anytime we get the opportunity to just get away and unwind and just put life behind us, we love to get away and travel and spend and look at different scenery and explore different areas to go, whether it's here in the States or abroad.

SPEAKER_00 1:25

Okay, yeah, I've been in 26 countries myself. So me and my wife, we actually met in China. So we love to try. So you're also a media director. You like the first, sorry, the second media director I met this week.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:38

Yeah, so tell me about you being a media director.

SPEAKER_01 1:41

I am the media director of our church, Faith Christian Fellowship in Greensboro, North Carolina. We actually have two locations, one in Greensboro, and then another one between Greensboro and Winston-Salem in a little community called Kernersville. And I oversee mostly the video aspects of our ministry. I schedule camera operators and stream out our services to online and to social media. That's pretty much what I do as a media director. Of course, we're coordinating with the audio team as well.

SPEAKER_00 2:14

Okay. So you do all that and you're also a minister, or were you previously a minister?

SPEAKER_01 2:20

How does I am currently a minister? I'm not the senior pastor or anything, but I am an associate minister and when called upon, I either preach or do something ministry-wise for our church.

SPEAKER_00 2:33

Oh, that is beautiful. Uh, I'm so grateful to have you today. And the reason you're here though is because you just wrote a new book, right? Yes. The book is called Unshaken. Is that your full name?

SPEAKER_01 2:46

The full name of it is Unshaken, holding on to faith during the difficult and heartbreaking seasons of life.

SPEAKER_00 2:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 2:55

And the premise of it is, first of all, it's always to glorify God. The book to be mostly about is to glorify God. But I'm telling the story of a difficult journey that my wife and I have endured for the last probably 12 or so years of our lives as we've desired to have a child, but haven't been able to have a child.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

Okay. So you don't have any kids? No, none. So, no, that's interesting. I'm gonna have to check out your book. I'm currently 36 years old, but I and I don't have any kids either. That was we do plan on having kids, but maybe definitely check out your book because it might be some stuff I need to learn in there. You know what I mean? Yeah. So, how difficult is it, you know, being an author, uh, a minister, and also a media director, like all is one.

SPEAKER_01 3:45

Oh wow. Well, the author part came about last year. So I haven't been uh writing long. I never really thought about even writing this story. It just I was at a seminar that was being conducted by a publisher, Ellie. During that seminar, I had this nudge to write this story, and everything came about. And if you see the cover in the background, that cover was given to me by the Lord, and I gave it to her, and she ran with it, and she basically took the vision and ran with it.

SPEAKER_00 4:25

Yeah, so she she she heard the problem that you were having, saw that what you need to do, and she just held your hand through the process. Right.

SPEAKER_01 4:34

Yeah, she did. She was encouraging me all along because we would have conversations and I would tell her what I'm looking to do with the book. Because I had actually, after I went through the seminar, I actually just started writing and it and and the writing process, it just flowed. Okay. As I was telling her and sharing with her the different things about the book, and I told her the vision I had for the cover, she just took it and ran with it.

SPEAKER_00 5:04

So let me ask you a question. How long did it take you to write the book? And when you met her, was it already finished?

SPEAKER_01 5:11

Uh, it was actually in the starting process when I met her.

SPEAKER_00 5:15

Okay. Um so how long after you met her did it take to finish your book?

SPEAKER_01 5:24

Okay, so I started probably somewhere around June. Okay. I actually finished it at the beginning of this year. So probably about months.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

So she can basically get your book launched based off of your idea in six months.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

And it took a little longer after that before it got launched, because there were some tweaks I needed to do, just going back and proofreading and everything. For the writing process itself, it went from between June to the early part of this year, right around January, February.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Okay. So, you know, as far as you, you know, being so deep into faith, I I do want to ask you a question. Do you ever feel like there was a moment where like your faith was tested?

SPEAKER_01 6:12

Especially during this infertility journey that my wife and I went on, because there was we went through adoption, we went through IVF, and we even did fostering. And none of them produced the results that we were looking for. So, of course, I have questions because of the different things. It's like, okay, what's going on here? It's because we've prayed, we've fasted, we did all of this, and still no results.

SPEAKER_00 6:43

Wow. So this actually, you not being able to have a baby, it made you question your faith.

SPEAKER_01 6:50

Yes, and it made me question a whole lot of other things too, because it's like, okay, not only did it make me question my faith, but it also made me question my myself as a man, especially I'm not giving able to give my wife the child that she wants, and it makes her question herself as a woman because you know it's supposed to be natural for a woman to be able to have a child.

SPEAKER_00 7:12

So it probably came to a point where you didn't know if it was you, you know if it was her, you know what I mean? So y'all was both both blaming each other, and then like after you blamed yourself, she blamed herself, then she probably started blaming you, you probably started blaming her, and then y'all probably started blaming God.

SPEAKER_01 7:31

And the thing about it is when we endeavor to have a child, especially when it didn't happen, we always committed ourselves to not put the blame on each other. We always endeavored to say that we're in this thing together. I didn't look at her as like, oh, it's your fault that you did that we don't have a child. She didn't look at me and say it's you my fault that we didn't have a child, but we said that we were in this thing together. Right. And these are part of what happened to even draw us closer because we weren't really putting the blame on each other. We felt like we could trust each other with our feelings and our emotions and everything. After our first failed attempt to adopt, I kind of withdrew and didn't know it. And she took that as a sign that I just moved on and that she couldn't come to me with what she was feeling, but she was still feeling this thing. And uh so we had a conversation and she was like, Well, I didn't really feel like I could talk to you about it because you felt like it felt like you were moving on, but the thing about it was I didn't know how to process my feelings and communicate it. So that helped me to be able to slowly start the process of being able to share how I'm feeling and what I'm going through and stuff and build that communication with each other.

SPEAKER_00 8:59

Yes, it's beautiful, man. You gotta just, I'm like, I gotta read this book. This is about to be a good book. Like, I if I'm gonna be honest, I haven't got any, you know, any like faith gerbin, like books from Ellie just yet, but I'm gonna have I'm gonna have to get this one, man. This one I'm I'm motivated to buy. Like, I'm seriously. So was there a time in your in your marriage where you know this was just so bad? I know it was, but tell me about one of the times where things got so bad and you both had to hold each other up spiritually in church, and people look at, especially the woman, because most of the times when people look at couples not being able to have a child, they would look at the woman and be like, put cast dispersions upon her.

SPEAKER_01 9:47

It's like, well, she can't get pregnant, what's wrong with her and stuff? And they don't look at the man as much as they would the woman, but sometimes in those situations, it's the man that may not be able to be able to get his wife pregnant. So we would have to there would be months where you know our church does baby dedications and then there'll be Father's Day and Mother's Day and stuff, and sometimes it hits worse than others, and so we would have to lift each other up because of the fact that these celebrations are happening, but we're not being able to celebrate ourselves because we're not having that child that we're wanting to have, and you're seeing other people that are celebrating, you got couples having more than one child, and we can't even have our first.

SPEAKER_00 10:42

Man, like you have to difficult. You got you gotta do more of these podcast interviews, man. I don't know if you have already, but this story has to be has to be heard, you know what I mean? Like, that's why I'm like, I gotta buy this book, like it's so interesting and like your point of view. So, what's the what's like a hard truth about you know following God and following Christ that people you feel that people just don't talk about enough?

SPEAKER_01 11:08

I think that being open and honest, and I think that sometimes it's like people hide what they're going through. They go through and put on a happy face and stuff. And I think sometimes church culture causes people you or shame people into doing that, because it's like, well, if you're not uh happy and energetic and stuff, your faith is something's lacking in your faith. And one of the main reasons why I wrote the book, because I want to encourage people to know that just because you're going through something doesn't mean that God is against you, that he's punishing you for anything that you've done. It's just something that happens with life because to be quite honest and to be real, we are in a fallen world. And sometimes because of the fallen world that we in, we endure difficult things in life. Like, for instance, you know, somebody gets sick, we can't just look at them and say, Oh, they ain't got the faith to believe to be healed. Sometimes you're not gonna get healed. I'm grateful for the times that God does heal because we've gone through a situation with my dad earlier this year, he had cancer and God is in the is doing miraculous things in my dad, but sometimes it doesn't happen.

SPEAKER_00 12:31

Yeah, so if somebody is silent, you know, about the situation and just holding stuff in, what would you say to them?

SPEAKER_01 12:40

I would probably say, go find somebody that you trust or seek some counseling because you don't want to hold that in, you gotta get it out, yeah. But seek some somebody that that you trust, not just anybody, but somebody that you trust and that you feel safe around, or you know, find a counselor or something, but you you gotta get it out. You cannot hold it in.

SPEAKER_00 13:03

You gotta just you gotta share it with somebody. If you can't find someone to talk to, then that's when you need to go get some counseling. You know, you have to go pay somebody because not everybody has those relationships, and that's when counseling is necessary, you know. Or, you know, some people do have those relationships, but don't have don't trust them, you know. And a counselor is someone that you can trust, you know. What would you feel like it is one prayer, you know, that you prayed on and you it still hasn't been answered? And how do you deal with it?

SPEAKER_01 13:34

I don't know if I would say that it hasn't been answered because it's been answered in a different way than I originally thought that it would. Yeah, we've prayed for years for a child, but instead of us getting a physical child, and we're still believing that we may have a physical child of our own, but God has blessed us to be godparents to their children. We've got a couple of godchildren, and it's been a blessing to us to be able to have somebody to really look at us, desire for us to be a part of a child's life. So I wouldn't say per se that it hasn't been answered, it just hasn't been answered in a way that we would have hoped to.

SPEAKER_00 14:19

Have you ever just felt like giving up? I mean, I guess it's no giving up because I mean you're just not you know having sex anymore. But have you ever just felt like just forget it? I'm tired of trying.

SPEAKER_01 14:31

We have because there's been times where, and unfortunately, it's harder for me to be able to be like because I am the media director at my church. I'm looked upon to be there, but there have been times where, you know, especially during the most difficult parts of it, I just wanted to throw in the towel. Uh, you know, I'm I don't want to read my word, but because of the fact that I have a greater hope, I continue to press on, I continue to uh pray and seek God, and I continue to stay in my word because if I hadn't, that would have been an easy target for the enemy to come in to draw me away.

SPEAKER_00 15:16

If somebody was like on the verge of giving up, what would you tell them?

SPEAKER_01 15:20

Don't give up because I mean, even though life is not a bed of roses, and even if life was a bed of roses, there's still thorns. So I would say not to give up. There's a uh a brighter light at the end of the tunnel, you just gotta continue to go through the ch tunnel, don't give up. Um, and if you're in a situation where you're looking to not go to church, continue to stay in church. Get that word that you need to encourage you and strengthen you because there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You just gotta continue to go through the tunnel. It might be yeah, because you're closer than when you started. When you go through a tunnel, if it might be a 20-mile tunnel, but as you continue driving along, those miles get shorter.

SPEAKER_00 16:12

Yeah, you know, a lot of times it's more about the consistency than anything, and that's why you have to keep going. You can't go to church one time and think everything, your life is going to change. You know what I mean? You can't go to the gym one time and think that your body is going to change, you know what I mean. You can't have one good meal and expect a six-pack. You know what I mean? So it's the consistency that that matters. You have to continue going to church, you have to continue good, you have to continue working out. That is what matters.

SPEAKER_01 16:48

Yes, because you gotta continue to apply those principles in a consistent manner. You know, sometimes you're gonna miss the mark, but when you do, just get back up and start back over and continue doing it, because at the end of the day, the results will come, yeah, and and you'll see God in a different way. Because even though you may not get what you thought you were gonna get, he may do it a different way. You just gotta continue to trust him and keep your spiritual eyes open and your spiritual ears open because you'll be able to hear different things and you'll be able to see things the way God wants you to see it.

SPEAKER_00 17:24

That's deep. I love that. You know, you like if you're an alcoholic and you drink it, you drink seven days in a week, you know, it's only seven days in a week. Now, if you take one day off and now you only drink six days a week, you're still an alcoholic, right? You're still an alcoholic, man. It is the consistency that matters. So thank you. That's that's one thing I got the message I got from you today. So thanks for the word, man.

SPEAKER_01 17:50

And that's the main reason why I wanted to write this book. Is at the end of the day, I wanted to be all about encouraging someone. This situation may not be infertility like ours, but I wanted to use our story to be able to encourage somebody because I don't know what anybody else's situation may be, but I wanted you to see hope, the story. And if I am able to convey that hope, then it's all worth it.

SPEAKER_00 18:21

I'm getting your book for real, man. Because you know, me and my wife, we don't really have any kids right now, and we don't want to have kids this next year, but you know, it's on the way. You know, I'm getting older, we're both only getting older, but you know, it just makes me think about it now. The whole fertility and everything, it's on my mind now. So yeah, it's gonna be interesting to read for myself and many others. So please do more podcast interviews, man. Please do great market. I'm gonna help market this book because it's gonna be a good one for sure.

SPEAKER_01 18:54

I praise God and I thank you for that inspiration and your support, and I thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_00 19:00

So, you know, last question outside of this book, do you have anything else that's coming out or on the lookout that, you know, people watching this video should be on the lookout for?

SPEAKER_01 19:10

Yeah, I'm actually in the process of writing another book. And this book, I want to encourage people who feel like they don't measure up, you know, people who have issues with self-esteem, insecurity, and stuff like that. Because I've had experiences growing up where I felt like I was less than and overlooked, and because I wasn't the jock or whatever, I was the skinny kid growing up and you know, being teased and all of that. I just want to encourage people to realize that you don't have to have it all together. Nobody else has a better relationship with God than you and stuff like that. So that's the next book that I want to put out, and I'm gonna use three different characters from the Word of God to help convey that message because they didn't have it going on, or they feel like they failed God in an area, but God still used them to do tremendous things, and that's what I want to do with my next book. And like I said, it's in the development process right now.

SPEAKER_00 20:13

I'm looking forward to it, man, because you know, sharing your story is so important in this world because people connect these stories to their lives, and you help other people grow by sharing your story, you know.

SPEAKER_01 20:26

So uh and it's helped me to heal, and it and and you know, as my wife and I have been talking, it helps you to heal. That's why it's always good for people to share what they're going through because you don't share it with somebody or or with a trusted person or whatever, you're not gonna be able to receive the healing that God wants to do in your life.

SPEAKER_00 20:48

That's why you got I never I never thought of it like that, you know. Because when you're going through something, is either you let it sit inside you and tear you up, or you share it with somebody, you can let it go, you can get over it. But writing a book, you get to share, you get to release so much more to so many more people. So it's it's like enhanced healing.

SPEAKER_01 21:11

So it encourages somebody else because it lets them know if God can bring that person through, He can bring me through too.

SPEAKER_00 21:19

I'm about to get my book out there, man. Percy, thank you so much for being in this interview with us today. But before I let you go, Percy, please let everybody know. Watch this video, like where they can find you. You know, that's like where they can find your book, your you know, your socials. However, you want people to reach out to you, just let everybody know, real quick.

SPEAKER_01 21:38

All right, the book is on Amazon and it's also on web Walmart's website, so you can go and get get it in those platforms here locally. It's about to be released in my book at our church bookstore at New Beginnings Christian Books and Greensboro. I'm on Instagram, brother P underscore 73. I'm on Facebook, Percy. R. White Jr. And yeah, that's where I am.

SPEAKER_00 22:03

All right, Percy. Well, thank you so much for being a part of Founder Fumbles Podcast. And everybody, that is a wrap for today's episode. Huge thanks to Percy for sharing his story with us, telling us his business and the highs, the lows, everything in between. Man, if his story inspired you in any way, shape, or form, please go reach out to him. Go follow him. Go check out his website. Go buy the book. Go to his socials and just say thank you for him sharing the story. Please, please do not forget to like this video, subscribe to this video, share this video with anyone who you think needs to hear it. Until next time, y'all, peace.