Religion Trauma

In this episode of the Bible Gal podcast, we get real and discuss the trauma people have with the church. How people mis-associate the people in the church with God, and the hurt that is had with the church. 

In this episode we cover: 

1. John 4:6-10 (story of samaritan woman)
2. Luke 19:1-10 (Story of Zaccaeus)
3. Revelation 3:20
4. Psalm 34:18
5. It’s not too late to get to know Jesus. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:28

This is gonna be your new favorite podcast for daily functionals and bumble study chats.

SPEAKER_01 0:34

Hey guys, welcome to another episode. Um today um we are going to be talking about the trauma that people have that we have um from religion and from Christianity. Um but before I start, I would like to open in prayer. Um dear Father, I just uh ask that you open our hearts this morning or today, whatever time they're listening, and open our minds so that we can receive your Holy Spirit, um, so that we can be moved by what you need to tell us this today, and that you just speak to our hearts. Um so um I know so many people in my life who have religion trauma, and I think that this is such an important topic that nobody wants to talk about, right? Some trauma. We don't talk about trauma, we just want to brush it under the rug and keep it moving, and we don't want to talk about what happened or what led us away, we just we want to, you know, push it under and never talk about it again, never come back to it, and just you know, ignore it. And you know, I have seen and heard quite a few situations during my journey in faith. Um, I have a friend who was um Catholic growing up, and she just has a lot of religion trauma with that. I I have another friend who uh grew up in a church as a child, um, and she also um just has a lot of trauma from that. Um and I have a family member who was a Christian and had a lot of trauma from um you know somebody in her life who claimed they were a Christian, and so they never want to come back to the idea of being a Christian, they don't want to come back to the idea of God, and you know they they hear me talk about it and they they support me, but they don't want to themselves um have a relationship with God because they have trauma. And I want to start this by saying that we cannot blame God because it is not anything that He did, He's perfect, but it is the people and it is the way that people are acting, um, and it's not about whether God lets things happen. I think a lot of people get messed up in the idea that God like let things happen to you. Um and you know most of the time that's not the case. You know, we live in a sinful world, we don't live in a perfect world, things happen. Um, and you know, at the end of the day, God is always there for us to get us through it. It's never the idea of of, you know, I purposely, you know, he's like purposely letting us go through terrible things. No, that's that's not it. It's more so, hey, I know this sucks, but I'm still here for you. And I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I'm still here with you, and and I will be by your side to help you get through it. Um But people who say that they are Christian in the church and they're living, um, but they're living in the world and they're not really living in Christ, and that is a huge reason why people have such religion trauma. Um, because you know, we let church trauma hurt and we blame God because of what we faced um with the people in the church, but it's not about who God is, you know, it's about who the people are. And um, you know, I I've seen and heard some situations where, you know, maybe you went to church as a kid, and you know, you were told to dress up, you were told to look pretty, to attend church, to look nice, and you know, you were told to sit still and to be quiet for two hours, and then you would leave and you would go back about your life. You know, you might have followed traditions where you went to church on Easter or Christmas or holidays. Um, you know, you were told that there was a set of rules that you should follow, and then that was it. And you missed out on a key component of who Jesus is, who God is. So when you were a kid, you know, the you dressed up, you went to church, you were quiet, you know, and you were told don't talk, you know, just be quiet and listen. And so there was this pressure, there was this trauma that you have because you felt pressured to be somebody that you didn't think you were. You had you know pressure to you know feel like you're supposed to be perfect, and you're supposed to pretend that you, you know, didn't sin and you you're supposed to, you know, sit there and and look a certain way, and um, you know, you would look at people in the church and they would, you know, say these things that you needed to do this or that you needed to be doing that, um, but they weren't doing what they were telling other people they should be doing, and so you looked at it and you were like, Well, why am I being told that I have to, you know, do these things when the people in the church are not doing these things? And so it would make you think, like, what's the point? Why am I here? Uh, you know, what what are we even doing here? And you start and you would see the fakeness of it as a kid. Um, you know, or maybe when you were a kid, you just blamed your parents because they didn't teach you God in the right way, you know, because you you just went to church and you came home and you went back about your life and God was in your life, but God wasn't a priority, you know, you didn't really get to know him. It was just something you did on Sundays um to have God in your life, and and then that was it. Um, but you know, after a certain amount of time, you can't blame your parents for not showing you God in the right way, and you can't keep blaming your parents for this religion trauma that you might have because you know at the at the end of the day, there comes a certain time where you became old enough where it was your responsibility. And you couldn't you can't keep blaming your family, or you can't keep blaming God for things that happened to you and you know the perceptions that you had when you were younger, because there were so many different factors that played into that, right? And how often do I hear stories like this? You know, we would see Christians act the way that everybody else acts in the world, and so we would think, well then what's the point? You know? I say, you know, these people say that they're of God and that they go to church and that they're godly people, but yet they're still being ugly in the heart. They're still gossiping, they're still doing things that you know they shouldn't be doing. They're still acting as if somebody who doesn't believe in God would act. They're still acting, you know, in the world. Um, they're still being bitter and they're still being selfish and um judgmental and you know, things like that. And so you see Christians who call themselves Christians act that way, and you sit there and you have that trauma, and you say, Well, if you're being fake, then this who else is being fake? And you say, Well, if they're acting like that, then what am I doing here? What is the point here? Right? And you know, Jesus talks in the Bible and he he says how many hypocrites he's seen, and he would say, and he speaks about it in the Bible about he would, you know, go from town to town, and as he's speaking to people, he would see these hypocrites. He would hear about these hypocrites, about these people who call themselves Christians, people who call themselves followers of Christ. But you know, they they want, and you know, it might not be that they're doing it out of ill intent, you know, they probably do want to have God in their life, but they're being mistaught. They did they miss the mark, they thought it was, you know, something to do for acceptance, or they thought that it was, you know, something to do to get in God's good graces of going to heaven, and that's just that. But they didn't really understand the point, they didn't understand that it's more than that. It's it's about relationship, it's about God wanting to have relationship with you, about you know, him saying, Let me do life with you, because it's gonna be dang hard to do it without me, right? How many people have you seen would do these things in church? You know, they would read the they would go to church every week, they would read the Bible, they would even speak about Jesus, but then the way that they were acting, you know, they were still of the world, it was still sinful, still bitter, still dirty, you know, still not loving, not honoring, not obeying the word, um, saying rude and mean things, and maybe they would host a Bible study, but then after everybody left, they were gossiping and talking about everybody, you know. And um, so you've seen that, and that kind of hurt you because you've seen the fakeness of it, or you know, maybe somebody talked about you when you were like younger, or maybe you were an adult, and maybe you tried to do this, and you know, they talked about you and they gossiped about you, and that hurt you. And so you were like, I don't I don't want to associate with that, so you would turn away from that because you were hurt, and you would turn away from the hurt, right? Maybe, you know, you were scolded at, you know, for things, you know, that you would hear, like, oh, being gay is a sin, having tattoos is a sin, getting drunk is a sin, you know, having sex before marriage is a sin, things like that, and you would feel obligated, you would feel pressured to be somebody, to act like this Christian. But it was just pressure, and you were just you just felt all this pointing the fingers, and you felt all this, you know, tension to feel like you had to make a certain mark, and you would deep down feel not enough because you knew that you were sinful, right? As we all are, and you would feel not enough, and you would feel not welcome and not wanted, not loved, and so then you didn't want to return, right? How many times have I heard somebody say that Christians are judgmental? And that is a very hard thing I still do this day, try to break. Because it's true there are people out there like that where they're gossiping about other people and they're being judgmental about other people, and you know, you associate those Christians with God. Let me say something, you don't want to associate with those Christians with God. Don't do that. Because those are the people of the world who are sinning, who fall short. Not God. You know, God was there the whole time. There the whole time. And if you let him, he'll help you with that hurt, he'll heal you from that hurt. He will love you in the hurt. He will show you the real way and how to have a relationship with him. But look at your trauma. You ran away because you were hurt. And a lot of us do that. And we ran away because it hurt. And and that's totally a pattern that we all do. We run away from the hurt because we it hurt and we don't want to face it. But what if what if we did face the hurt? What if we did confront the hurt? What if we did acknowledge the trauma and face it head on and say, you know what? I don't have to do this alone. I don't have to face the trauma alone. I don't have to face the hurt alone. I don't have to face, you know, the stones that were thrown at me alone. I can do this with God. Because we can't blame Jesus or God for any of these things. Jesus forgave every single one of us. He forgave every single sinner when he took that beating, when he was accused of things he didn't do, when he was hung on the cross, when he was mocked for things he never did. He did that for you. He did that to for your salvation, for your life. He did that for you. And Jesus says, I he will meet you where you are. He said, I will meet you where you are. He says, I want a relationship with you. I want to get to know you. I just want you to get to know me for who I really am, he says. That's what he wants. He doesn't want a community of gossiping. He doesn't want a community of you have to do this and you have to be that. He doesn't want a community of pressure or pointing fingers. No, he wants the realness, the brokenness. When you say, oh hi, how are you? He doesn't want the oh I'm good. No, he wants the no play pray for me, I'm going through it. He wants the honesty. Because that's where he's at. He's in the midst of the storm. So don't let that religion trauma, you know, give you the idea that you had to be perfect to go to him. Because that's all wrong. You know, in John chapter 4, um, you know, in verses 6 through 10, I've spoken about this story in one of my recent episodes. The story of Jesus, and he's uh going from town to town. I believe he left um uh I can't remember. He's either he either left Galilee or he's traveling to Galilee, and he stops um in Samaria on the way, and he he comes up to this woman, right? Uh she's not in faith, and uh he comes up to her in this well, and he offers their this living water, the living water, he says, right, and then he he uses living water as uh a reference and what he's regarding to as you know the Holy Spirit and and eternal life, right? Salvation. And he starts talking to her, and uh she's at the well, and you know, they're having a conversation, and you know, he confronts her about she has had seven husbands and she's currently single again, and so she's honest with that. But he says it doesn't matter, you were honest, and that's okay. And he still says that she still has the opportunity to have the living water, and he just starts talking to her because that's what he wants. He wants to start talking to her, he wants that relationship with her, right? He wants to be honest with her, and out of all the past, out of all her sins that she had, he still made time to get to know her. He still made time. The story is way more dramatic than this. He travels in the desert from this town he was in and where the town he was giving a message in, and he's going to another town to give another message, but he stops and he meets this lady where she is in her brokenness, in her sins, and he says, You still matter. You still are worthy. I see you, and you still have the opportunity of eternal life, and you still have the opportunity to be saved, and I still want a relationship with you. And she was, and she was saved, and then she went out to the town, told everybody about Jesus. And the story goes on with other points that is not in today's episode, right? Or in in um the chapter of Luke, um and well, yeah, in chapter 19, verse 1 through 10, the story where Jesus uh stops to meet uh Zacchaeus in the tree, seeking him out of his place in isolation, to speak to him, right? To meet him where he was, to offer salvation, because he's seen him. He also seen that he was deserving of you know being saved. Because he wanted a relationship with him. He said you're still worthy of being forgiven. You know, in Revelation 3.20, he says, Here I am, I stand at the door and knock. Right? He speaks about how Jesus will initiate contact right where you are right now, because he wants to get to know you, he wants to build a relationship with you. That's what this is about. And it's important for me, if if I'm being quite honest, to give the right example of a true Christian, of a true child of God. Now that doesn't mean that I don't fall short, that I don't sin, that I don't have my moments, that I'm convicted to change, but I make sure that when I am convicted to change, I make it in my best efforts to do it. Because I never ever ever want to give off the impression of a fake Christian. I never want to trigger somebody's religion trauma. I want to be real. I want people to really, truly see the light. I really want people to see who Jesus really is. So I will constantly ask God to seek my heart to show me where I'm going wrong. And let me tell you, He will tell me where I'm going wrong. Second I ask. Sure he will. You know, to continue to strive to learn more about who Jesus is and to continue building my relationship with him. And I say, I know Jesus, and I know that he loves hard. He forgives. He forgives, he forgives you for turning away from him because of the hurt that you had from the people. He forgives the people who were misrepresenting him. He forgives the gossipers of the church, the people who were pointing fingers, the people who were being hypocrites. He still sees them. They still have the opportunity to really be saved. Salvation is about really accepting Jesus into your heart, really accepting him. Not just speaking about the things about what we should be doing. But as I want to close this out, I want to read a verse in Psalm 34, verse 18, that the Lord is close to the brokenhearted. He saves those who are crushed in spirit. For who he is, not for who the people are, or your perception of who the people are. It's not about the people. It's about him. To accept him, Jesus as your Savior for what he did on that cross. You can get rid of all the false visions of the Christianity trauma that you have had. And you can say, Jesus, I choose to truly seek you. So I want to wrap this up and I want to pray with you before I go. And um I want to offer this salvation uh to pray for your salvation, and you can either, you know, repeat after me wherever you are, you can pray in your own head, pray out loud, whatever. But I encourage you to pray this, even if you've already prayed this prayer. Um, you can never pray it too much, right? It's kind of uh like renewing your vows. You can always renew your love. Um But yeah, dear Father, I uh just want to say that I know that you, Jesus, died on the cross for my sins, and I don't want to do Life without you anymore. So I want to accept you, Jesus, into my life. Into my heart, into my soul. As my Lord and as my savior. I want to do life with you from here on out. I want you in my life. I want to get to know you. And I choose you. Jesus. From here on out I choose you. I don't choose the people who've hurt me, but I choose you. I choose you to help me get through to do life with. Amen. Amen and amen. Alright, guys. If you have any prayer requests, um you know where to find me. You know my email is your biblegal at gmail.com. Um and also you can always email me or message me. I would love to hear if you have any um topic requests that you would love to hear about. I would love to hear from you. Uh so with that, I will see you next time. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 23:12

Thank you so much for listening to today's episode. If you'd like to hear more, there are new episodes that drop every Monday and Thursday. If you liked what you heard, please help your gamble out by leaving a review. You can also give using the link below. I'd love to pray for you. If you have any prayer requests, please send me an email to your bumblegamble at gmail.com, which is also in the links below along with all my other social media so you know where to find me. And remember, sisters, you're only in faith this week. God is with you every step of the way.