Dialing In with Brett
It’s sad, really. No one wants to start a podcast nowadays — so Brett stepped up. Dialing In with Brett is a dry-comedy show where comedian Brett Neustrom does what any curious (but lazy) person would do: cold calls people with his “hard-hitting” questions. Are all “boy moms” secretly in love with their sons? Do parking enforcement officers ever feel guilty? Do old people have sex in nursing homes? Brett’s got the questions. The guests have the answers. And you? I’m sure you probably have nothing better to do.
Critics are calling his unserious, light-hearted, and wildly dramatic interrogations a brilliant way to nourish the human psyche. (No critics have written in, but I’m sure they’d say something along those lines.)
New episodes drop every Thursday… Now, let’s dial the f*ck in.
Dialing In with Brett
5. is it embarrassing to be on reality tv?? ft. greg grippo
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This week on Dialing In with Brett, Brett threatens the imposter posting his old tiktoks, chimes in on Conrad vs. Jeremiah, and dials in a former reality dating tv contestant.
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i'm being impersonated
Speaker 2Hi, this is Brett. I was dialing you in because I had a question. I there's no way. Hello God, what a dick. Hello y'all. Um, how are y'all? How are y'all Randomly not getting any views Just across the board on all platforms, which is great, which is a great segue.
Speaker 2You know who is getting views? The person impersonating me on TikTok. Let's talk about it, let's get into it. Do I care that someone is reposting videos of me randomly? No, I actually like don't care. I don't really care that much about social media in general right now. I've been doing this probably about four years. I got bigger fish to fry. You know, I'm gonna kind of picking and choosing my battles, protecting my peace and shit like that. Anyways, this man is or woman a woman can steal your tiktok account too, believe it, or fucking not. Wake up america. It's the girls too. Um, anyways, they're posting all my videos getting just like significantly more views than I I would have ever seen, which I don't mind. Again, like, push my shit out, please. I don't really care who's getting credit for my content. It it's my face. You're obsessed with me. You're pushing me out. People are going to see that.
Speaker 2Something I do have a very, very strong problem with is you posting videos of me with my bleach blonde hair. What the fuck, like genuinely, what the fuck? Obviously, I'm blocked. I can't see it at all, and people just will send me the videos like, oh look, this one has 1.6 million views. What? Oh, my god, that's awesome, that's so cool. Which, again, like 1.6 million views for my video, something I did. You can have the views. Like I genuinely don't give a fuck. Like I got like 2 000 views on my last video. Like I'm fucking fine, I don't need the views. It's never been about the views for me. Again, if you post one more video of me with my bleach blonde hair, I will freak the fuck out. Like genuinely, like I'm gonna like immediately go to the authorities. I'm gonna call the fucking cops, take you to court.
Speaker 2Small claims, big claims too. It's a big fucking claim. Okay, it's my career. Anyways, just post the good shit like again, like I don't care that you are completely stealing my content and also my username and my brand. Don't give a fuck. Don't post the old shit like it's like videos that like I can't even anything I posted online before 2024 is not my fucking problem. Is it still actively online? Yeah, I'm not gonna go and delete it. That shit's embarrassing. Also, yeah, I used to actually get good views on my videos, so I'm keeping that up for proof of concept.
Speaker 2Some of those videos, though, like my fucking God, I was watching it. My friend pulled it up because, again, blocked, blocked. She was pulling it up like going through. It was like videos from like 2021. I would genuinely shoot that man with a rifle if I could. Like I can't, even, like I can't even watch a podcast episode from a week ago because I'm like, yeah, it wasn't that funny me three years ago. Are you fucking kidding me? No, absolutely not. Like I'm trying to like scrub that version of myself out of my life again. All those videos are completely online and anyone can access them at any given point.
Speaker 2There also was a phase where I had black hair. Did I have like a kind of like a weird red hair too for a minute? Yes, that's the thing about like dyeing your hair. It's just like, oh, like. Now I'm just like fucked. Like I bleached my hair, obviously like dry as fuck. I've never fully recovered from it, and then it's like okay, my hair is fucked, might as well add some red to it.
Speaker 2Looked horrible, was doing like strawberry blonde, like it looked like a fucking my little pet shop ass, like haircut, whatever horrible. And then I was like fuck it, dye it black. I've worked my ass off to look semi-remotely normal now and act semi-remotely normal Like let's not hold my shit against me For views too. Really for views. What was the JoJo Siwa thing? It's like you bitch. No, not the you traitor. Yeah, you're just a traitor. No, she's like use me for clout For views. You know that. You don't know that y'all live online.
Speaker 2My friends here like genuinely, will like say, like the most niche ass, like references that obviously I don't get. I randomly like don't go on social media as much as you would think it being my career and like, again, just like me being a gen z tiktoker. Like my brain's obviously fucking rotted, but it's randomly not with like brain rot. Social media I also hate like brain, brain rot. I'm quirky. Shut up, shut up. You're just dumb, you're just stupid. That's why I also feel about golden retriever boyfriends like my golden retriever boyfriend. He's ah, he's crazy. He's such a such a silly boy bitch. He doesn't understand mental illness. He can't have a normal conversation like he doesn't do shit. He just like prances around, oh, oh, my god, he doesn't fucking care about you. Um, but, um. But he gets excited when I come home.
animal apothecary, muzzle magic, etc
Speaker 2I don't fucking care anyways, if you're the person using my videos again, fucking proceed, but with caution now. If I don't have the current hairstyle that I do now, don't fucking post it can I ask you a couple questions regarding rita's spay consultation?
Speaker 2you can you can, I might oh, I didn't tell you guys just a thousand dollars. Um, well, like part of it. So it's kind of like a deposit. So you're actually gonna like I hate when it's like this is a deposit, okay, why am I still spending a thousand dollars? And it's like some of that will go towards the other thing? Wow, really, you mean that also, bitch? What do you mean? Spay consultation? I went in a month ago and he said in a month it's time for her to get spayed. And now it's like, oh, I'm leaving a thousand dollars poorer and just being like, yep, she still needs to get spayed, what the hell.
Speaker 2And also just like they pull a ton of shit where it's like I mean you don't technically need to do this, but I mean if you love your dog, I would yeah, obviously, I'm going to fucking pay for it. Then, like, what do you mean? But yeah, it's just like I think everything's a fucking scam. You know what it reminds me of? Like it reminds me of like those bitches who, like always have their clipboards and are like raising money or trying to get signatures outside coffee shops, which is like I'm glad someone's doing this, because I obviously am not volunteering to do this and I appreciate you guys doing that. Why are y'all like, hey, you seem like a guy who's not okay with animals being brutally abused. Yeah, got that fucking part.
Speaker 2I have a, I have a heart, but I don't have two minutes to give you my email, like, I'm so sorry, there is difference and I am a good guy. I'm not going to sign your form, I'm not going to, and I've actually donated to these before. Oh, mr Resident, good Guy, shut the. It was like $15. How about we make that a monthly payment? How about not? I already stopped. What do you mean? I gave you all of my information randomly and I'm giving you $15, which is like literally no money. You're welcome, by the way. What if we make that a monthly payment? Baby? What if I take away my card right now and I kick you in the nuts? Kidding, I wouldn't do that for the dogs.
Speaker 4Can I give you a couple of vet clinic names and you tell me if you would take your dog there?
Speaker 2Yeah, I mean I'm taking my dog to modern animals, so I'm kind of like past the whispering pup sure the animal apothecary no, I barely know what apothecary is, so I'm not taking her there, thanks muzzle magic no whiskers and are these real muzzle magic's fucking insane.
Speaker 2Like the magic of putting a muscle on your dog, like if you think that's a magical experience taking away your dog's ability to like bark or breathe. You're fucking insane. Um, yeah, we're just getting to it. Um muzzle magic on friday. Yeah, it was only 16 grand. So it's like cool baggy. I made a video making fun of sydney sweeney, making fun of the american eagle campaign that she did, which was fucking nuts, and in the part she's like it's like what type of jeans do you like to wear? And she's like um, baggy, and it's. And for guys, like for guys, also baggy. So I can't just stop, I can't stop saying baggy and the sydney sweeney's voice. So if I do say that, it is that someone I'm working through and it's top of mind.
Speaker 4So, anyways, um, no, I'm not taking my dog to muzzle magic randomly and last but not least, would you take rita Whiskers and Wags Wellness Center?
broke behavior from apple
Speaker 2no, just because I'm not saying all that shit, choose one. I'm not doing alliterations, just modern animals, perfect, and $16,000. Check when you, when you get a chance. So I got a new phone recently which $1,600 great, cool. What the fuck?
Speaker 2Why does Apple not give you a charging box with a new fucking phone that is so cheap in a way that infuriates me beyond belief. I just dropped $1,600 and you're just giving me the cord to plug into what bitch? To plug into what? What do you mean? Also, remember the fucking good old days when you get an iPhone that also would give you headphones. We obviously completely lost that. Now we don't even get the fucking box to charge it.
Speaker 2Also, another thing why the fuck is my brand new phone that I paid $1,600 for? They give it to me at 30%. Put it on a fucking charger. What do you mean? This is the Apple store. You have unlimited chargers. I know you guys got boxes. I charge. What do you mean? This is the apple store. You have unlimited charges. I know you guys got boxes. I fucking don't, because I had to pay out of pocket for that. Put it on the charger. I bought a brand new phone 42. No, that shit does not fly with me. I will paying 1600 for a half charged iphone without the box, so I can't even throw it on the charger when I get home. You are fucking us over. Also, icloud oh my god, this could be a whole episode. What do you like? I hate when you get like the iCloud notifications like hey, hey, bitch, you're fucked, absolutely no storage. I would start deleting family photos. I would delete important text messages, most of your apps if you could, because there's literally no option except for that.
Speaker 2Because you're out of storage, bitch, you're out of storage you can't do anything on your phone and then it's like, okay, great, I just deleted, like my sister's wedding pictures, um text messages with my mom telling me how much she's proud of me, um. And then it's like, oh wait, like it's like, if you want to pay a dollar 99 a month, we could just give you all this extra storage that we told you you didn't have. Where is it coming from? Where is it coming from? Also, like the iCloud bullshit. It's like I have storage on my phone, but this fuck ass iCloud. We just have unlimited storage. You just threatened to be with my life, told me there was no other option. It's like well, okay, I guess I should have like, led with like, if you do pay ten dollars a month, yeah, you can have unlimited. What? So? Obviously I pay fucking ten dollars a month for my 1600 iphone that I had to buy a charger for. That was at 42. Thank you so fucking much, apple. You were cheap as fuck.
Speaker 2Uncharged iphone without a box. Baby, why is this Apple store like a fuck? Like the fucking Pentagon, the like Florida ceiling windows. The ceiling is like 70 feet high, with like reflective mirrors. Baby, just give us a fucking box. This could just be a normal store. And you just like, maybe it's $1,400 for the iPhone and you give us a fucking box. This could just be a normal store. And you just like, maybe it's $1,400 for the iPhone and you give us a fucking box. I don't even care about the headphones. We're so far past that that I don't even remember a world where you would treat us that well. Also, again, like if all of this shit is true, stop ruining our iPhones after a year?
group date?? f*ck no
Speaker 2Why the fuck is my iPhone unusable after one calendar year? I hate Apple. But then again it's like I'm never going to switch to Android because I like. That's one thing where I'm like stick to the fucking status quo, be who you are, be who you are, be who you want to be. You know, like, no like. Be the true version of yourself. Don't ever get an Android. Like what Like, genuinely like. I would not get an Android. Like what Like, genuinely like. I would not get an Android because I care about other people, because I'm selfless. I'm not fucking over my friends by ruining every group chat. Not, I can't FaceTime. I'm nothing without FaceTime. Anyways, apple's a fucking scam. I will continue to buy exclusively Apple products and take it up the ass from them and buy my own chargers separately, sold separately. But goddamn, does it piss me off? All right, anyways.
Speaker 2Our next guest is a former reality tv star. I am so I'm not even obsessed with reality tv because I think it's like trash tv that I do consume sometimes, but I'm just so obsessed with, like, the logistics of it. Like what do you mean? You're just like going on a reality tv show. Also, there's so many things like we don't know as viewers. Like what? Like y'all throw all these hot bitches in like a compound and just like film them non-stop. Like I need to know every single thing that happens.
Speaker 2I can't take reality tv seriously. Like if I were on it, like what do you mean? The challenge is strip down to your whitey tighties, do like an obstacle course with foam and the like. Love island challenges are so fucking insane. It's like make out with six islanders, strip down to your undies, do an obstacle course and then get pied in the face and then dry hump another Islander what? And then it's also like oh, also, we're gonna throw in one more thing where you have to like throw so much shade at someone else that's here, and it's gonna like cause a huge fight.
Speaker 4Okay, great, um, I'm gonna kiss so on the bachelor for, like they'll do, group dates.
Speaker 2I'm not doing that either. It's where you go on a date with 10 other contestants no.
Speaker 4And they'll do. Challenges of you have to do a talent show and perform in front of the Bachelor, bachelorette and maybe even a crowd. If you were in a talent show, what would you be doing? I wouldn't be doing anything, yeah, but if you're vying for the heart, if I had to do a talent I like don't have.
Speaker 2Well, I just got a pogo stick that doesn't fit my fat ass. Could do something with that. I also think the idea of like a group date is so insane to me. I think if I wanted, went on a reality dating show, I probably wouldn't end up liking the person, just like due to who I am, as to my core is just like usually not liking anyone. And then. But then I also would be like what do you mean I'm gonna lose to other people? Like no, I need them to like me more than everyone else, but like I also don't like them. But I need to win if that makes sense and I would like.
Speaker 2I'm not a jealous person, but like what do you mean? Me and nine of us, me and nine other people are going on a date with you. That's not gonna fly, baby. If you want me, then choose me. But again, like you have no other choice, I will go on the group date, I will do a talent, I will do a tap dance for the talent show, um, but I'm not gonna be fucking happy about it. That's just the thing I'm like. I'm not an age anymore where, like, I am willing to be embarrassed for no reason, like, if I'm gonna be embarrassed, there needs to be a like, a good fucking. I actually can't even think of one reason why I ever need to be embarrassed.
Speaker 1Um um brett. What would your dream date be? On a dating show like, with no budget in mind, you can do anything they've had like a country artist, come and serenade, no a couple I hate that shit, like it's always so.
Speaker 2Like I hate when it's like a one-on-one date and then like one like c-list celebrity singer like comes and sings for them. I am not a person who like I would just like be like what is this?
Speaker 2like what do you mean? We're trying to like figure out our relationship and then like some like bunk ass country singers like singing in the background, and then you have to like at least like semi address the fact that there's a country singer, but then it's also like hey, are you gonna choose me? Are you gonna choose one of the other 46 guys here? And this is also. We have like two minutes to talk and one of the two minutes, like billy ray fucking cyrus is singing ready set. Don't go like. What do you like? I can't. Kenny chesney is, I know like two country artists billy ray, cyrus, kenny chesney but I'm like get the fuck like. But then, again.
Speaker 2You have to like semi, be like oh my god, my God, holy shit, oh my God.
Speaker 2It's also like the guests. I mean, like Love Island did just have Megan Thee Stallion, which, like, yeah, I would be excited to see, but it's always like some like C-list. It's like we got Iggy Azalea. Like it's really hard for me to imagine like me like jumping oh my god, iggy, oh my god, holy shit. But you have to like do that. I also think the thing that makes me laugh so much about reality tv is I'm like nothing is ever that fucking serious, but then I'm like you don't have your phone. You're like held captive by these people, like they're telling you what to say and do, yeah, I would freak the fuck out if, like, anyone else came into the like villa. Like I haven't talked to anyone besides the like 17 dumb fucks that are here. Like bring me anyone and I will be excited. I will pretend to give a shit about Iggy Azalea for seven minutes just so I don't have to talk to these dumb asses.
goofy guy arc
Speaker 4Would you send yourself home? Yes, like you're leaving.
Speaker 2No, I would just probably win and then break up with them after. I do think I would either be like the most hated or like everyone's like oh he's fun, he's funny. Yeah, I do think I would like.
Speaker 1I would get probably fucked by the edits so they had a season with two bachelorettes, gabbyby and Rachel. Oh, I no, yeah.
Speaker 2Oh, I watched one season and it was when Claire oh yeah, wasn't that Dale Claire, and that was Dale mentioned.
Speaker 1But the season that they had two bachelorettes. If you were the bachelor, would you be interested in having a co-bachelor?
Speaker 4No, Are you fucking kidding me?
Speaker 2He's an Aries, so of course not, I'm an Aries, of course I wouldn't be okay with sharing the bachelor with someone else. No, what the fuck? Y'all are here for me, sorry, you want this fucking bimbo, take him.
Speaker 4If you had to choose one of your friends to be co-bachelor with you or bachelorette, who would it be?
Speaker 2Someone co-bachelor with you or bachelorette, who would it be? Someone ugly none of my friends are ugly, so I can't go like head to head with someone that like is even remotely in the same league as me. Like I can't even like fathom that. The bachelor it's like okay, everyone here wants me. You added another one. Okay, now I'm splitting time and obviously I wouldn't give a fuck about like the connections at all. I just would be like everyone has to choose me over the other bachelor on the bachelor.
Speaker 1Specifically when they choose a new person to be the bachelor or the bachelorette, there's usually a big photo shoot that displays like one trait about the person. Pilot pete all of his promo shoot he was like on a plane are you asking me what you think my thing would be like.
Speaker 2I really don't have like hobbies or interests really. Um, I do think they would just like make me just be like gen c tiktok, I would be like the goofy guy and it would be like very fucking like negative connotation that would drive me up the fucking wall and then I would. I would cancel. I think the word goofy is like so fucking disrespectful. I'm not goofy, I'm funny, thank you.
Speaker 2Goofy is like silly voices and I feel like that's what they would like. I would be like claimed as the goofy guy baby, like that's mean, that's me. Would you guys say I'm goofy? And if you say yes, open the garage and get the fuck out like genuinely, that's not funny anymore.
Speaker 4That's not goofy anymore. I like goofy with like class clown and I don't think you're class clown Not to be like such a dick and think I'm like the greatest person to ever walk this earth.
Speaker 2Am I a little pissed? I didn't get a single senior superlative. Yeah, what do you mean? I also went to a high school with like a graduate class of like a thousand. Okay, I'm a star, I'm a star. I remember the one that I was like oh, like I could get. It was like most likely to like host a late night show.
Speaker 1Yeah, I did get two, you got two.
Speaker 2Yeah, okay, ran through. Okay, class whore. Yeah, I'm sure if you blow your way through junior high you will get a senior superlative like no fucking shit on the bachelor, if you make it to top four, you go to hometowns.
Speaker 4If you were to take someone to des moines as your hometowns like, where would you take them?
Speaker 2just get us like a really nice airbnb somewhere. Also my family can come there, because like we don't need to like yeah, but you like have to do it in your like.
dialing in greg grippo
Speaker 2I bounced around as a kid, so I don't have a hometown. I've only lived in Iowa my entire life, the same house with all 26 years. I bounced around. Um, I guess, like what do you and would my hometown be alright? So we're dialing in a former reality TV star. I am just so interested in reality TV. I could never go on reality TV because I just don't want to. I guess that's all. Stop fucking asking me questions. But I am just like so enamored by reality TV star people. I also hate that I don't know everything that's going on and I know there's some shady shit happening behind closed doors and I need to get to the bottom of it, even just like sleeping situations, the just like other bachelors. Oh, we're calling in Greg Grippo. He was on the Bachelorette four years ago, maybe. Anyways, I want to know, like, what's going on in the house, what we're not seeing. You know how much of it is acting, how much of it is staged, etc. Anyways, let's call in this dumb fuck Kidding. He's sweet, hello Greg, hello Greg, how are you.
Speaker 3I'm good, greg, how are you?
Speaker 2I'm good. How's it going? It's good You're live on Dialing In with Brett. Just so you know Meaning live meaning it's not actually live when we're going to edit the shit out of it and cut anything. That's not interesting. But let's just get into it Please. So you were on the Bachelorette, okay.
Speaker 3I'm not going to get into it, okay.
Speaker 2Were you not yes, I was um, what is like, what's the vibe in the house when you're not being filmed? Like was everyone cool for the most part honestly, um, it was pretty fun.
Speaker 3We literally just um hung out, drank all day can you drink?
Speaker 2is there a limit of how much you can drink? Yeah, it's two drinks an hour, but I mean, damn, if you start, yeah, what is it like? Beer and wine, or y'all have like an open bar they had like this new rule.
Speaker 3It used to just be like complete open bar, there used to be no limit, and then, um with us I think like during covid they like just started to like limit it more because like we weren't traveling so we were just like stuck in the house and everyone was kind of just like, uh, accusing the alcohol a little bit and so they like cut it back dramatically and uh, I think it was just like hard.
Speaker 3If I remember correctly, it was hard alcohol like only at night, but like beer and wine and like seltzers during I still feel like you can get like pretty fucked up from those rules.
Speaker 2Absolutely. Were you ever drunk on camera like did you watch any of it back, actually, or no? Oh my god. Yeah, of course I mean you're obsessed with yourself.
Speaker 3Kidding god, you love yourself I was cringing the whole entire time, honestly what was the hardest part to watch of yourself?
Speaker 2and then I'll give you my answers. Kidding, I haven't seen the show.
Speaker 3Sorry, I feel horrible no, horrible, no, the hardest part, oh my God. No, this, this I actually don't even want to tell you, because I know you're going to like probably look it up and make fucking fun of me.
Speaker 2Yeah, I will.
Speaker 3No, there was like this part. Oh my God, it literally makes me cringe. There was this part where there was like this big ear, literally like a statue of an ear in the middle of this field and we had to sweet talk the ear and Katie, and then the two hosts were there like listening the whole time and I I felt really awkward so I didn't want to be serious, so I just like did a line from you did a line of bosses which was he was?
Speaker 3he was like I'd like to bend over and show the 50 states. Um, and I just named states. I just started naming states because I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how else to fill up my time because there was like a minute time limit and I said the line in 10 seconds and I was like, holy fuck, where do I go from here?
Speaker 2did you get like multiple takes or was it literally just like we have the one take? Or would they ever make you like redo takes?
Speaker 3No, it was one take.
Speaker 2And then you were acting the entire time, right? I'm kidding. Didn't you get like called out for acting.
Speaker 3Sadly. Yeah, Somebody found a photo of me at my acting school and said I was trying to hide it and I don't know. It was so bizarre.
Speaker 2What did you say? Your job was going into it.
Speaker 3I was marketing. I was marketing for a documentary called Fantastic Fungi.
Speaker 2Fantastic Four Fantastic Fungi. Yeah, fantastic Fungi. There's no way, yeah. What was your intro and do you feel good about it?
Speaker 3I was happy because they were kind of just like. You know, we're not going to have like a specific intro for you, you just kind of go out and introduce yourself. And I was like shit.
Speaker 2Wait, they don't give you any like guidelines or anything.
Speaker 3No, they do for a lot of people. They'll give them like a gimmick, like some people will ride in on a stallion or ride in on a 1989 Corvette and you just walk up to her.
Speaker 3Mine just kind of like. They were like exit the limo, go talk. I was so shocked when I got out because I didn't. I knew there was. I didn't run a tv show, so I was expecting there to obviously be a lot of cameras. But when I went out there was literally like I just spotted I feel like every single one of them. There's like these guys on the roof, there's these guys on side inside there's at least like 15 cameras like right in your face and I just remember being like I'm really nervous and I just I don't know she was really cool about it.
Speaker 2It was cool so what'd you say?
Speaker 3why I think you're dodging that question um, I literally said I'm uh, I'm shook up, I'm a little nervous right now. And then she was like don't be, don't be. And I was just like uh, my name's greg, I'll see you inside there's no way.
Speaker 2Some people are riding on stallions and you're just like I'm a little bit scared. No, literally I want to hear more about just like the behind the scenes.
Speaker 3Were there any guys where it's like you so clearly aren't getting the rose but they just like had like random confidence you know, because for the most part I mean every single week we had to like pack our bags because none of us knew what was gonna happen yeah so that was, that was the worst part which, technically, weeks are, I think, four days or three days there.
Speaker 3Um, so, uh, yeah, every four days or three days you had to pack your bag, pack your whole whole suitcase up, like two or three of them, and I don't know. I think for the most part a few guys caught a good read. I mean some guys that, like you know, didn't even get like 10 minutes, were oddly confident at some point and I was just like, okay, but no, I mean, if you're getting like dates and stuff, I mean it's hard not to be confident. Like I would hope that people have enough, you know, feel for a date at this point if they're on that show, to kind of understand if they have a connection or not.
Speaker 2Are people like talking about like what they're going to do after the show, or is it just like immediately after every guy's like all right, I'm a fuck it podcast or like are they like scheming?
Speaker 3oh no, um no, I think like, especially with, like, the bachelor. Um, you know, their like tagline is there for the right reasons? Pretty much so nobody. Nobody could utter a word about after the show and like possible opportunities or anything, nobody said a word are you cooking your own meals?
Speaker 2are they catering, everything like, do you get a place your orders? I also feel like it's a situation where I would just I mean, maybe I'm just a big back, but like I assume I'd always be like kind of hungry no, I was always, uh, fairly hungry and we weren't able to cook because it wasn't like we were in the bachelor mansion.
Speaker 3We were in new mexico. They had the staff that cooked for us, uh, three times a day, and other than that, it's like you ever want to snack on something it was literally just like chips and like cereal was the food good or no?
Speaker 3no, no, no, no, no, it was. Sometimes it was. It was pretty good, um, but I mean, like, more often than not, like we'd be, I think the most clutch part about the food was after rose ceremonies it would literally be five o'clock in the morning. What, why that? That was. The hardest part about it was, um, you know, they do this thing called b-roll, where, um, they kind of just like have you staring at the sky with your, like your suit on and every, they go through every single person that's there because, like, they get you shooting shots, like in the mirror, looking at yourself, you're like tying your tie, and it's just a bunch of different shots. And then you gotta stroll outside through the desert and you know like pick up some sand, maybe throw it in the wind I'm gonna make a fan edit of just all of your b-roll I don't know we'd be.
Speaker 3I'd be ready with my suit on at 3 o'clock and then the cocktail party wouldn't start until 11 or midnight.
Speaker 2Why? Because they just had to get shots of you throwing sand.
Speaker 3No, literally, and then so we'd sit there for at least eight hours to nine hours, and then, eventually, the rose ceremony would last. The first night lasted until like 10 am, um, which was horrendous, and then it was around like the four or five am mark um.
Speaker 2It was the longest nights of my life what's the most embarrassing, like the most embarrassing part about all of it? Like what? Like all of it? Yeah, like, obviously the the ear thing was fucking horrible I would never be able to come back from that and again.
Speaker 3I am gonna watch that hereafter, but honestly, probably having a breakdown on national tv yeah, that's really fucking bad no, no, no, it was no, it was, it was terrible. I uh, I don't think anyone was talking about it, though I know, but watching it back when I was there or when I was, uh, watching it, I was watching one of my best friends and, um, I just remember I was like, oh my god, I need to leave. This is this is it, was it was. It was terrible.
Speaker 2It's just so weird, especially if, like you, have like a heavy part, um, in the show okay, lead character, lead actor, when you book the lead role, the lead role of the Bachelorette, like fuck Nice. Okay, could you vape. Or like smoke. Is there a smoking section?
Speaker 3No, but I kind of was having like a little bit of a panic attack. One episode and one of the producers. Let me hit the weed pen.
Speaker 2Oh hell In the oh hell, that's so sweet. What was like coming back after, like, what was like the general, like social media element of it, like were you getting shit on, like was that like horrible or like what was? Were there fan edits? My producers really want to ask you about fan edits. Do you watch fan edits? Do people make fan edits of you, or do I have to do it myself? Not anymore at all During the show. Yes, again, they're really pushing this fan edit question. I'm so sorry. They said what song would you want his fan edit to? So, if you don't mind, just for my girls, can you answer that? Let?
Speaker 3me think. Honestly, I would want it to be romantic. Uh, okay, give me like a romantic kind of feel. What is it? Uh, maybe you know what?
Speaker 2no, maybe like mr bright side or something okay, you know, there obviously is gonna be a clip of you with the ear in it. I'm making this. Later I'm gonna have ai make this fan edit. I'm kidding, I'll make One of my employees do. Actually, what do you think is the most Embarrassing thing to do once you come out of a reality TV show?
Speaker 3I think it was like Honestly, kind of Trying to put myself out In the dating world. It just felt weird because I feel like Everyone, because at the end of the day, like we're not like some pro athlete or we didn't make this like multi-million dollar company, like we're literally on a fucking reality show and there's a million of us. At this point, whenever I would walk into a bar or something, I would feel like a little embarrassed um, because there was like a lot of chirps. And like people, because after it people were a little, you know, mean at times on the street in New York here.
Speaker 2What would they say?
Speaker 3They would just be like you, fucking manipulator. That's not bad.
Speaker 2How would you respond to that?
Speaker 3I would just put my head down honestly and just like keep walking. I would never like clap back. I was in um chicago this past weekend we're all leaving um and we were going back back literally. I was not even drunk. I'm chilling. It's like you know 1 30 in the morning. We're going back to order some pizza. I'm getting in the car and this one girl from the sidewalk goes hey, greg, and I look and she literally just flips that was like this past weekend.
Speaker 3Yes, damn it was this past weekend you're like getting hate for life no, honestly, I thought it was kind of iconic, I thought it was pretty hilarious. Yeah, that's so funny.
Speaker 2So honestly kudos to her. Would you rather get Bachelor Nation tattooed on your chest or give me $10,000?
Speaker 3Give you $10,000.
Speaker 2What? $20,000?, $20,000?, yeah, yeah, I would still do $20,000.
Speaker 3$50,000?.
Speaker 2How small is the tattoo? It's like pretty, pretty good size. Like you know, the like no regrets tattoo from where the millers?
Speaker 3I think no, no, no, no, no, you're getting 50, then 100.
Speaker 2Have you ever been on the vile files?
Speaker 3yes, I have. Honestly, if it was on my ass I wouldn't care.
Speaker 2Okay.
Speaker 3Honestly, I think that would be a funny ass tattoo.
Speaker 2Yeah, just do the chest or give me $100,000. Thanks, would you ever go on Love Island?
Speaker 3No, no, I'm way too old for that.
Speaker 2You're right Kidding. What do you think is the most embarrassing reality show?
Speaker 3I don't think I could ever do something like Married at First Sight yeah that'd be horrible. Like just sitting at the altar. I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2I mean, you're good at acting, I'm sure you could.
Speaker 3Because I think you get legally married before anything.
Speaker 2Do you have to get legally married on the Bachelorette or no, or just it's?
Speaker 3a joke. No, you just get legally engaged.
Speaker 2Okay. Do you have to sign papers for that?
Speaker 3What to get engaged.
Speaker 2Yeah, no, no, okay, that's like a fair question. Why are you laughing, jesus?
Speaker 3Because there's no paperwork with getting engaged. Okay, Greg, I know that now.
Speaker 2God, wait, did you do hometowns? I forgot.
Speaker 3Mm-hmm yeah. Did your parents think that, like it was?
Speaker 2gonna work and shit like that. Well, my dad's dead, so she met my mom.
Speaker 3I like right after I said that I remember that I just wanted you to fuck greg, like, god damn it, like.
Speaker 2And then I was gonna say your mom and siblings and then you didn't want to fix it. Yeah okay, well, thanks, now I'm gonna. All 15 people who watch this episode are gonna be fucking pissed at me. Um no, yeah, she met my mom, my brother and, uh, one of my best friends from college um, how much did you talk to the host, like what was like hosting, or who was also the host?
Speaker 2it was caitlin bristow and tasia adams did you interact with them a lot like privately, or was it pretty much just like when you see the hosts you're filming?
Speaker 3No, it's just when we see the hosts we're filming. I think I've seen I saw them there for a total of I'm not joking you probably five minutes.
Speaker 2Okay are there any things that, like, you need to just kind of get off your chest? Obviously, you don't give a fuck about the NDA and you're acting the entire time, but again you did kind of get the shit out of the stick and people are still cussing you out in public. So, like, if you need to like say something like now is your opportunity again, like probably 42 people will watch this, but of those 42, maybe one of them's the one who flipped you off.
Speaker 3Yeah um no, I I honestly don't have much. Honestly, it's um, I don't know. I think it was probably one of the trippiest times of my life and, honestly, I think I've moved so far away from it that like I don't know, I'm just so detached from it all. I get the question when people ask you know, oh, are you from the Bachelor? And I'm like I feel weird saying yes because I'm like I mean I guess so, but this was also like five years ago. Yeah, I don't know. I think I just feel weird in public sometimes yeah, that's fair.
Speaker 2yeah, I mean, if people are like yelling and screaming at me, obviously all my fan interactions, like people are just fucking obsessed. People just eat me up so I can't even imagine like anyone being against me. I'm kidding, but guys, he's. He's a good fucking guy. He's just trying. It's his first time here on Earth too. Yeah, was he acting? Sure, was he there for the wrong reasons, of course? Was it a strategy? Yeah, plain and simple Friendships weren't real either. He's very media trained as well.
Speaker 3All right. Well, do you have anything last minute to add before I hang up on you? No other than me and Brett ate Chinese food together one night, and he did not take one bite.
Speaker 2That's like okay, you didn't eat much either, by the way.
Speaker 3Well, because you made me feel awkward.
Speaker 2Okay, well then you took the left.
Speaker 3Did you eat the leftovers? Yes, after you threw up okay, no, I did throw up the next morning, yeah and I didn't.
am i in the wrong??
Speaker 2So okay, well, I will talk to you so soon. Thank you so much for your time. All right, god. Anyways, you know what you love it. Am I in the fucking wrong? Am I in the wrong for feeling like my wife watches too much reality TV? I can just tell you right now, you're fine.
Speaker 2My wife is constantly watching some shitty ass, trashy ass, even reality TV shows. If it's not Sister Wives, it's T-Mom or some fucked up cult documentary. Even Dog the Bounty Hunter what Okay? Like reality tv shows. If it's not sister wives, it's t-mom or some fucked up cult documentary. Even dog the bounty hunter what okay? Like dog the bounty hunter sounds like very interesting and I'm imagining like a dog like solving crimes. That sounds sick as hell.
Speaker 2She even listens to podcasts about it and because she doesn't like wearing headphones I guess I am too I feel like it's a constant barrage, barrage band. It it's a constant barrage, barrage band. It feels like a constant barrage of shitty people doing shitty things in some fucked up premise. Yet when I try to put on headphones or something, she gets notably disappointed that I don't want to hear the latest awful thing that happens in whatever strikes her fancy. The worst part is that she falls asleep to these things and while she is off in a dreamland, I have to sit there and be subjected to hours of this schlock, because it's damn near impossible for me to fall asleep with the TV on. Yet if I turn it off, all of a sudden she's wide awake talking about how she was watching that. I love my wife dearly, but I've reached a point where I'm over it. I don't care about the latest thing that happened on Temptation Island. The world is awful enough as it is and I am tired. Am I in the wrong? Like I want to be pro women so bad. But also like I get it. Like I consume some reality tv shows. But like it's really hard when someone's like so invested in something that you quite literally do not give a shit about at all and they talk about ad nauseum like baby, I didn't see it. Like I just like think it's like with reality tv, it just gets to a point where it's like I don't watch, like I don't need to hear about it, I don't want to like talk about it put on your headphones also like oh, I was watching that, baby, I'm trying to sleep. It's also hard when it's a reality TV show because it really is just like trash TV, which is so fun to watch, but again, like I don't need to.
Speaker 2I hate hearing about shows that I don't watch. I hate hearing about things where it's like it kind of sounds like you needed to be there, type of thing, and like I don't need to hear the backstory about people that I don't know doing stupid things that I don't care about. Maybe maybe your girlfriend can come over and she can, she can watch it with you and y'all can. Y'all can chit chat about that like I. Just I genuinely like again pains me to fucking say it, but I do think you, the lady, my lady, my liege, are in the wrong.
Speaker 2I do think it is a thing where it's like I get so annoyed when someone's like telling me something that I don't have the context of. I even have like a hard time when people go like an extreme depth about like a dream they had. I believe you that it's interesting. That sounds fucking insane for you, but I wasn't there and also it didn't happen. And same with the reality TV show. It's like, oh my God, what he cheated on her. Are you shitting me? It sounds exactly like something that would fucking happen in a reality TV show. Also, I don't know who Annalise is. Stop throwing her name out like I do.
Speaker 2It's not your boyfriend's problem that, like you, like reality TV. I'm sure he's like probably annoying about watching sports Y'all can just do your own thing. And sports, y'all can just do your own thing. And when it comes to the tv at night, like get an ipad and again like nothing is surprising in reality tv, they cheated. Yeah, oh my god, this one girl called this other girl a bitch. Yeah, that's the fucking point of reality tv. If no one's calling anyone a bitch, like what is it then? Like what's the point? All right, I'm, I'm dialing her in.
Speaker 2She's in the wrong. God, it's so hard being anti-woman. Hello Hi, how are you Good? Just watching reality TV Sounds like you baby. So I hear your boyfriend doesn't love all that shit. Yeah, oh no, you actually don't need to tell me what happened in the latest episode. I really don't give a fuck and I'm actually here to tell you that you are in the wrong. Yeah, no one actually cares as much about reality TV as you.
jeremiah needs to go under the needle
Speaker 2And if you haven't seen all like 47 episodes of that season, like it's really hard to understand and it's not even worth explaining to your boyfriend if that makes sense. You guys can just have separate things. You guys can come together at night in silence because you're actually going to be putting in your headphones now when you go to sleep. Yeah, but you are in the wrong and it pains me to tell a woman that she's wrong, but in this case I'm okay with it. And yeah, just you can keep watching reality tv, but just put on your fucking headphones. And also, it's not rude if your boyfriend puts on his headphones because, like you shouldn't be like it just it just gets to a fucking point that makes sense. Yay, she honestly is like more understanding than you would have like expected. Like she got it completely. Um, anyways, that is, am I in the wrong? I'm watching the summer, I turn pretty like it's so bad, but obviously I stop every single episode and I like can't stop watching it.
Speaker 2Jeremiah, like deserves to be like punched so fucking hard in the gut. I don't need him shot dead, I just need like really like I need the wind knocked out of him and those fucking blue eyes, like if I had eyes like that, like I would genuinely like go under a needle and get him like surgically removed and changed Like there's no reason someone needs to be looking like and also like why do they make him so cringy like belly mcgully? Also like her real name is belly, right? No, isabella, if anyone fucking like don't ever call me belly in any capacity, I get it's like short for isabella. Yeah, don't piss me off, it's short for isabelle.
Speaker 2Belly's fucking insane as a nickname. That's like if someone started calling me like gut, are you fucking again? I know it has nothing to do with her belly, don't even say it like genuinely. Belly is like fucking mean. I also got called chubs back in the day and also loves for my love handle. So it's like maybe I'm just a little bit more sensitive than the average person. I'm not doing belly again. Like don't ever even fucking remotely call me anything of this sort, anything related to my midriff region. Let's not draw attention to it, thanks but, yeah, anyways, both the boys suck.
Speaker 2She's just like belly. Also, it's like I love the girl, just hard to root for sometimes, like what do you mean? You're getting engaged after you just found out your man cheated on you seconds ago? I'm 21. Yeah, obviously I'm gonna get married. We've been together. You're a child. You're a child and you're acting like a fucking child. I used to hate that taylor girl. She's kind of growing on me a little bit. She's kind of growing on me a little bit. She's kind of growing on me a little bit Like hey, get it, bitch. Like hell, yeah, girl gang. Anyways, hate Jeremiah though. Like everything he stands for. He just like stresses me out, grosses, not grosses me out. That's mean.
Speaker 4Do you think there's a difference between Jeremiah cheating and Taylor cheating?
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Speaker 2Yes, here's the thing If a girl cheats on a guy, it's fine. Like really we're going to make a whole fucking big deal about that. If a guy cheats on his girlfriend, you are like baby, like you are in the wrong. That's all for this episode of my Turn Pretty. It's mid, but I will watch every single episode and fucking sob every single time. Thank you guys, so much for just an incredible episode.
Speaker 2This is the first episode I did take an Adderall which I'm prescribed. Don't even come at me, baby, I have ADD, I live with it, we exist. But I did take an Adderall before. I don't know if it helped me or hurt me. Kind of love it. I feel great. Genuinely hurt me. Kind of love it. I feel great, genuinely. I feel great. Um, hope y'all could hope y'all could feel that, hope y'all could feel the chemistry and shit like that and see that adderall working through me and pulsating through my veins. But truly, like y'all, we have big things to come. We're dialing in more people. Um, we're getting messy or am I in the wrong? Shit's about to get weird and sticky and messy and I want you guys to be a part of it. Thank you so much for your support, remember just absolutely blow the fuck up on all of my social media platforms, like I don't know why you guys aren't doing that organically, so I do it because I'm literally telling you to do it. Yeah, feel good about it. See you guys next week. I am.