june 2026

The Catch-Up Bit: 00:00 (6 minutes) 

• weaponize the future

The Feelings Bit: 06:18 (6.5 Minutes) 

• Making it into art.

The Recs Bit: 12:51 (8.5 Minutes) 

• Movies Discussed: Backrooms, Obsession, Disclosure Day
• Music Discussed: weaponize the future, Dinner Party (Album) by Niall Horan

The Fandom Bit: 20:49 (5 Minutes)

• Ruth's Summer Soulstice Event (Momentus) 
• Kim & Briana's Upcoming Convention from your Couch Event (Momentus)
• FanExpo Boston
• For The Love of Supernatural

The Questions Bit: 25:42 (7.5 Minutes) 

• 26:10 - beeblossomedits: Any good underrated tv show recommendations? 
• 28:14 - shaymbrooks: How do you deal with anxiety and huge life shifts? 
• 29:38 - clarice_olivia:  What are your tips for taking good photos of yourself? 

If you're interested in submitting questions for The Question Bit or recommendations for the Recs Bit, feel free to email bestie.emmie@gmail.com. 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Terrible news for everyone. Just completely gut-wrenching, awful news. So I have been I'm I'm sorry to start this way, actually. Like, let's take a friggin' moment. I'm so sorry to start us on this sour note. Um, my doctor has told me that I am currently banished from having cute little drinketies. I don't have a drink for this podcast. I am only right now allowed to drink water. I'm fine. Don't worry, I'm fine. But like m I'm having symptoms and my doctor thinks that only having water is going to help. So I'm only having water. Boo. Boo. I shouldn't say that. I do like water. I drink a lot of water anyway, but uh it's just part of the c the it's part of the podcast culture for me at this point, where if I'm recording a podcast, there is a cute little drink, the cutest little drink you've ever seen in your life. It's sitting right in front of me, and right now I am barren. I feel naked. So I am gonna go ahead and ask you guys to have a cute little drinkity right now on my behalf. Uh feel free to DM me with your drinks of choice. Uh if someone could have some kind of tea, that's what I would really like to have right now. But I'm having water. Like a good little child listening to her incredible, wonderful, radiant, perfect doctor who's never done anything wrong in her life. Honestly, this woman, she's incredible. So I would I would if she told me to eat dirt, I would. I'm gonna be so honest with you. Thankfully, though, I will obviously not be eating dirt. And welcome to the yapping bin. Welcome to the catch up bit, first of all. First and foremost, as always, let's catch up with each other. I feel like June was a big month for me. Was June a big month for anyone else? Is there something in the sky or something? We'll start with the obvious. My debut music duology, Weaponize the Future, came out this month. Oh my god. I'm gonna be honest, it still doesn't really feel real to me. Like it still feels like no one has heard it, even though many, many a person has told me that they've listened to it, whether it be on like Spotify or other platforms, or even just like the stuff that I posted on social media, the clips and stuff that people have been really nice about. What's so insane is I actually haven't even looked at the stats at all. I don't know. I think I just like numbers are so weird to me as a concept, I think. Like I'm feeling a lot of support for the music, and it's just like I don't I haven't felt a need to look and see exactly how many people are listening on XYZ thing, but you know what? Fuck it, let's go look at it now. I can start with what's on Spotify. So I have to get access to my Spotify for artists, by the way. I've been trying to do that for a while. Uh total streams is almost a thousand, which is really crazy. For like this is my first release ever, okay? First time. Like, I've never released a music and it's already being a music. That's insane. And it's only been two weeks, too. Like, I feel like I need to lock in for myself for a second on that. Like, it's really only been two weeks, and there's already almost a thousand people who are listening to it. Only on Spotify. Like, I haven't even looked at Apple Music or anything like that yet. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's go back to the stats. Um, looks like Weaponize is getting a little more attention than the future, which does not surprise me because I feel like The Weaponize is the song that I made second, and I do think it's better than the future, like technically speaking. Looking at the locations is crazy too. Because like, obviously, the US and the UK are my top, and then after that is Canada and Australia, but like Germany, New Zealand, Brazil, Sweden, France, Ireland, Estonia. Four people in Estonia. The Philippines, Spain, Switzerland, Slovakia, Slovakia. That's insane. Guatemala, Nigeria, India, Denmark, Argentina, Italy, Mexico, Ukraine. My God. It's so weird. Like, I feel like sometimes with stuff like this, because when I look at numbers, I try, because obviously, like I have a lot of followers or whatever on my stuff. Not a ton, but like I have I have a substantial amount. So numbers like this, like, they're they're it's very easy for me to look at them and go, that's small, but it's it's also for me so important to look at numbers like this and be like, that's a collection of actual individuals. Oh my god, for top playlists, I was at any point in the time on Spotify on a release radar playlist. That's crazy. It was my first release. How the hell do they know that people would want to hear it? It got 35 streams from that playlist. That's insane. Oh my god, I'm so stupid, dude. I was looking at my distributor and the information that my distributor had, but that was not as updated as it could have been. So I logged into like a Spotify for artists thing that I was able to get into, and it's so much more than that. Oh my god, I'm so dumb. 95 playlist ads, guys. What playlists are you putting my music in? I'm dying to know. I'm dying to know. Okay, I have to revisit this later because I'll get sucked in and I have to record a fucking podcast episode right now. Because this is it's fucking when I'm when I'm any, how late are you recording this podcast? It's June 28th right now, and it needs to be sent out on the last day of June. So we're behind. And for some reason, while being behind, I have decided now is the time. I've had I've had two weeks to look at this stuff, and now is the time I want to look at it. Good lord. But I'm so honestly, like, it's so meaningful to me to have these songs be out and to have people listening to not just creatively what I did, but also like hearing the stories that are in them and being able to share bits and pieces of that how I was able to. And I think it was really fun being tactical with how I was wording different things and how I was speaking about certain stories and what I was doing. It makes me really excited for the next thing that I want to release musically, because that's already in my head. In fact, it's so I'm it's so bursting at the seams that I'm like desperately trying to figure out a time when I'll be able to talk to my producer, Chris, and work on it with him. Because I think I'm gonna like I almost want to just send him vocals and be like, this is this is the vocals, this is the vibes. What are you can you try throw something together and then we can just maneuver it that way? Because it's just so clear in my head of what I want it to be. And it is, I think, going to lean a little bit more into like the aesthetics and the vibe of weaponize, because I think I really I don't know, I guess I think I maybe I'm just an angry person, but I really like making angry music. I'm there's so much passion, I think, in anger, and it's so rewarding and like almost like a release to be able to put that in music versus screaming it at the top of my lungs in my car, which is what I usually do. I had other stuff that I could talk about in the catch up bit, but I feel like now we've been, it's I'm at six minutes now, and I have I feel like this is a really good segue into what I want to talk about for the feelings bit, actually. I think it was, and I apologize for getting a little fangirly in the feelings bit, but I think it was Taylor Swift who said something to the effect of no, it was, it was Taylor Swift in her interview with the New York Times about her songwriting, where she mentioned like she sees people who will like tweet about an issue that they're having or like something that they're feeling, or they'll post like something like they're type in their notes app and post about it or something to that effect. And she sees that and she's like, no, don't do that. Make it into art. Like that's what people want. Like, make your make your feelings into art. And like, oh my god, banger concept. Absolutely a banger concept. When I think about what my music is about and what it will be about, and all of the ways that I could have dealt with it, like the fact that I turned all of that crap into music, like that was the best thing I could have done. Not just for myself, but for everyone around me. Nobody wants to sit around and read notes app like paragraphs. Nobody wants to do that. People want our, and especially in a world right now where, and I mean I've been talking, I feel like a broken record talking about this every single month. But I feel like right now the world is just so dead set on not creating or experiencing anything for themselves. Our attention spans are so small. It's making everything like insufferable. Okay, wait, put a pin in what I'm actually talking about in the feelings bit for a second. You know what I watched recently? I found on twitter.gov a post with the video from one of One Direction's old perfumes, like an ad that they did. One Direction fans, you'll know what I'm talking about. It's the one where Niall Horrin, like, cracks an onion and he cries a tear into the perfume bottle. It's that one. It's a really like it's a short film, basically. And it's a long ad. It's like over a minute before they even mention the actual perfume or show you the perfume. That shit would never fucking fly now. Oh my god, that would never fucking fly. If that ad came out today, it would need to be shown. The perfume would need to be in there within 0.5 seconds because no one is looking at anything for longer than 0.5 seconds. Oh my god. And because we are so like our attention spans are so broken. I'm saying we because I'm including myself, obviously, our attention spans are so broken. We are in such an immediate desire of dopamine. We are in such an immediate desire of doing, getting the reaction, getting whatever you need to happen, saying it, doing it, whatever, right now. The first thing that comes to mind is always what people want to do these days. And I'm speaking about myself as well, obviously. It's something that I'm working on. And in a situation where you can make some kind of crazy post or you can talk shit or whatever you're gonna do, right? In that kind of situation, the first thing that you think to do is just blah it all over everybody. Anyone who will listen, anywhere on the internet, anywhere around you, within a five-foot radius to five mile radius, whatever. It's just about doing the first thing that you think of. But we all, I feel like, need to just start taking a second and being like, wait, okay, pause. Holy shit, pause. What other reactions can I have? What else can I do that is not the first reaction to blah it everywhere? Making art is a great reaction to have instead. It's so great. And if you're like mindfully looking for ways to be able to do that, I think that's such a great way to practice a new form of mindfulness and being more present in the choices that you make instead of just sort of acting in any kind of whim. I feel like intention is so important. And when you're taking emotions and putting intention behind them, that can just change so much. That can change so much. If you're putting an intention behind an emotion through art, whether that be music, actual physical art, painting, drawing, whatever, anything like that, hell, photography, jewelry making, literally anything. You could pour emotion and you can pour situational things and anything like that into anything at all that involves the creation of an art or product. So why are we all yelling at each other on Twitter? What the fuck? I'm gonna be honest with you. Since I read that quote, I have been trying so hard to do that, and I have written more like snapshots of lyrics and song concept ideas than I have pretty much in my entire life as someone who has loved music and loved creating and writing and telling stories. It's so easy, dude. It's so easy to like shut down and like just jump at the first thing that's gonna get it out of your system. But you know what I've discovered too since I've started trying to create art out of the things that I'm feeling and the things that I'm dealing with is that it's so much more rewarding. Think about dealing with your emotions like baking, you know what? Hold on. No. Think about dealing with your emotions like painting something, actually. Say something happens to you and you want to yell about it, or you want to do something that isn't really gonna help anything at all, and you just need to get it out of your system, whatever, blah, blah, blah. Say it'll take you maybe five minutes, right? How effective was that in getting your emotions out of your system? How it was you you only spent five minutes navigating it and figuring it out and looking at it. The painting equivalent of that is just like drawing a stick figure. Like you have such complex and such interesting and incredible emotions, and your mind is so powerful, and it's so possible to look at things in such incredible and nuanced ways. And instead of painting something that could be close to the cistine fucking chapel, you drew a stick figure. We are all wasting our potential. Pick an art form, guys. Pick an art form and like really sit with the feelings that you're having. And it doesn't even have to be like music or painting or whatever I'm talking about. It could like have a journal for God's sake. Good lord. Man, I have to get back into my journals. I haven't journaled in like a week and a half. Maybe it's because I was fostering a kitten, maybe that's part of it. I've just been so busy. Whatever. That's not the point. The point is sit in your emotions longer. We need to be sitting in our emotions longer. And a really great, really healthy way to do that is by turning them into any form of art that speaks to us. I genuinely, and I say this from the bottom of my heart and the heart of my bottom for real. I genuinely hope that you guys listen to this and you're like, you know what? Maybe I could turn what's going on in my life right now that's negative into something beautiful. Okay, I think that's a good place to end. We're gonna hop into the Rex Bit now. Okay, here's the deal. I had a plan for the Rex Bit this month. I was really gonna go on a deep dive about my music, Weaponize the Future. I was gonna go on a deep dive because I've done so much with those two songs that was so unbelievably intentional. And I was gonna go into a super crazy deep dive on it, but so much good stuff has come out in June. And we already talked about my music a little bit. I don't know. I'm gonna do the Rex bit as normal. But if you guys want me to do some kind of crazy deep dive on my songs, let me know, and I will. I could even probably bring my producer, Chris, in on it, and I'm sure he would do it. He's the best. You guys would totally love him. But I saw three movies this month, guys. I gotta, I gotta talk about my movies. First movie I saw, as promised last month, was Backrooms. I did go opening weekend. I think I went that Sunday. I just opened up the review that I put on Letterboxd. I said, this is like if Stranger Things and the Blair Witch project had a baby that made me want to kill myself. That's a compliment. I really liked Backrooms. I feel like it's a movie that I'm gonna need to watch again. Cause it's so it feels very dense kind of and complicated, but it scared me. She did what she was meant to do. I don't know how hot this is of a take, but honestly, I don't think I liked it as much as I thought I would. I feel like the there like there was a plot and everything, but it was it wasn't a it didn't feel I'm stuttering so bad right now. I should re-record this, but I'm not going to because I want to be authentic here. Okay, I paused and I came up with a wording. There was a plot in this movie and there were themes, but I feel like the actual narrative from start to finish was a little tricky for me to follow, especially timeline-wise. Like timing-wise, you know what I mean? And I don't mean pacing. I don't mean like the actual speed of the film itself. I mean like actually what time it is and how f how much time has passed. And I think part of it is probably that that was intentional. Like the movie's about liminal space, and so for the time to be sort of warped and hard to understand, I think that that's good, but I just had a hard time following the movie because of it. Maybe that makes me stupid. I don't know. And then the next weekend I went and I saw Obsession because everyone's been talking about obsession. And honestly, it wasn't really even on my radar. I didn't really care. I didn't really know what it was about. I knew the main actor, oh my god, what the hell is his name? I'm looking at Letterboxd right now. I'm sorry. Uh, Michael Johnston. I knew him from Teen Wolf. So I was excited about that. Uh, but I figured I would just go see it on streaming, but then everyone was talking about how amazing it was, and I was like, how is it truly? So I went to go see it, and yeah, it's as good as everyone says it is. Yeah, it five stars from me. Uh, I my review on Letterboxd was literally what a phenomenal movie that I cannot wait to never watch again for as long as I live. And I mean that. Actually, I'm not sure if I do. I might watch it again at some point, especially if someone who hasn't seen it before wants to watch it, and I want to watch them watch it, you know what I mean? But this is what I said, right, when I left the movie theater. I was talking to my mom and I was like, Yeah, so you know how sometimes when like the credits roll on a movie and you're like, wow, I'm never gonna watch that again. That was phenomenal. But I was so scared and I'm never gonna watch that again. And she looked at me and she said, I know exactly what you're talking about. I've seen many a film with that energy. I said, Right, great. So I felt that 15 minutes into this movie, and I still had two hours to go. I was nowhere close to done, and I said, Oh, this is gonna be one of those movies. This is just and then it just got worse. It just got worse and worse and worse and worse. But in the best way, in the best way for real. That movie is so good. The horror is so good, the stances and takes and messages about autonomy are so good. I loved that movie. I thought it was so great. And the third movie that I saw in theaters was Disclosure Day. And I didn't really I wasn't super interested in seeing this movie in theaters. Uh, and then someone told me that it's about the day that everyone finds out about aliens, and I was like, oh, that sounds so good. That sounds so interesting. So I went during the day. I went to a very like old people town, and I got a ticket in a midday showing, and it was me and like 20, 24 other elderly people, like just deeply old and geriatric. So I had a great time, obviously. But there's something that people aren't saying about this movie because they're like, that's a spoiler. But like, if someone had said this to me before I watched the movie, I would have saved my $30 and not gone to seeing it in theaters. So I'm gonna tell you, and I'm gonna hopefully save you the $30 if you haven't seen it already. It's not about the day that aliens are revealed to the public. Okay? That's not what it's about. It's about what led up to aliens being revealed to the public. And then just when you're like, oh cool, the plot's about to start, the movie ends. Uh. Why why? Why did they do that? This is also one of those movies where like you're watching it and you're spending the entire movie, the whole movie, trying to figure out what the fuck is going on. You really don't know. You have you nothing makes sense until like the end of the movie. And it's like, I get why people do that when they're making movies, because then it's like you want to go watch it again. Because now you know, right? You know everything that you didn't know the first time you watched it, so now you want to go watch it again. But oh my god, that's so annoying. Like, if your driving force of your movie is the fact that the audience is sitting there going, what is happening? That feels like lazy writing to me. I'm sorry. If you cannot keep your audience engaged and aware of what's going on truly in the plot, I feel like that's bad. That's not good. That's not great. I should say, I didn't hate the movie. Okay, I didn't hate it. I didn't it wasn't like my favorite movie of all time. It definitely wasn't Steven Spielberg's best. Not sure where everyone's getting that information. But we need to stop lying. We need to stop lying and telling people anything but the truth. And the truth is that the best part of this movie is Emily Blunt and the woman who's at the end. They are why I gave this movie three and a half stars instead of two and a half stars, and I'm not kidding. Honestly, Emily Blunt, Mama and Oscar behind you. Mama and Oscar behind you for real. She did so good in this movie. She is the heart and soul of this movie, and I'm not even joking. Okay, and last but not least, other than my own music coming out this month, I do, which I talked about already, I do want to highlight Niall Horn's album, Dinner Party, really quick. Hey! So that's an amazing album. Comprehensively, as a body of work, that is a phenomenal album that is so good. If you take nothing at all from the Rex Bit today, do me a favor. The one thing I'm asking of you, go to Spotify, go to Niall Horn's album called Dinner Party that just came out this month, and listen to the song Monochromatic. It's not a single. It should have been a single, Niall Horn, When I Catch You. But it's not a single, so he's not really like performing it, but it's like it's the song of the summer. Oh my god, that song should be the song of the summer. I'm so pissed that it's not getting the recognition it deserves. That song is Peak Driving in the car with the windows down music. That song is so good. And that song, okay, the song is about like wanting a girl to be monochromatic, right? So take off her all her clothes until she's monochromatic, i.e. naked. So that song is about seeing a woman fully. Yes, it's slutty, but let's be meaningful for a second. That song is about seeing a woman fully physically. The song after that in the album is called She Gets It From Her Mother. And that song is about seeing a woman fully in the spiritual sense. Seeing her in her entirety and who she is and what she gets from her parents and all those different types of things. And Nial Horn, you are so big-brained to put those two songs next to each other, seeing a woman fully physically, next to seeing a woman fully spiritually. You're so big-brained. You're so genius. Everybody go listen to Nile's album. I love it so much. Thank you. And just like that, we're into the fandom bit. Whew, man, I feel like I'm saying a lot on this podcast. Like, I'm feeling like I'm talking a lot. Well, obviously, I'm talking a lot. Hey, so I'm recording a podcast. So obviously I'm talking a lot because that's what I do when I record a podcast. Obviously, because I'm not fucking stupid. But I feel like I'm talking a lot and I'm talking really fast. So I'm hoping everyone's keeping up. I'm really sorry here. Ruthie's event happened this month, the Summer Solstice event. That was so amazing. I had such a great time. She's so cleansing. I love her event. Oh my god. Wait, hold on. Oh my god, wait, hold on. My cat came over to eat some food. Did you hear that? Did you hear it? Ah! I love my cat so much. Okay, anyway, wait, fuck. What was I saying? Hold on. I have to pause and go back. I forget what I was talking about. Ruthie's event. Right. Right. I love Ruthie's events. Every time she does like a solstice thing like that, it's so genuinely from the bottom of my heart cleansing. Like, really, truly, like I wish I could convey it correctly, but I can't. The vibes in the chat during those events are so cozy comfy. The vibes that Ruthie and Charlie make together are so cozy comfy. It's such a great time. It's Such a wonderful reset. I feel like it makes okay, it makes like every season to me feel a little bit like New Year's. You know how New Year's like it's a new beginning and it feels like something fresh. And you're like, okay, what goals can I set? What intentions can I put? It makes that happen for my brain four times a year. That's what Ruthie does with her solstice events. I love them so much. She is such a radiant little star. Kim and Brianna also have convention events with Mementous happening in July. I'm so excited, guys. I miss Kim and Brianna so much. I miss Kim and Brianna. Okay. I miss Kim and Brianna so violently. Someone needs to lock me up. That's how bad it is. I miss them with every fiber of my being. There is not a problem in my life right now that could not be fixed by Kim Rhodes wrapping her arms around me. I'm not joking. There is nothing that could bomb over any wound of anything happening in my life at all. Like Brianna Buckmaster looking at me and telling me to fuck off. I need it like I need air. This actually reminds me, I need to upgrade my ticket to a meet and greet. Cause I need to speak I need I need them in my spirit. I don't even know what I'm saying right now. I need them in my spirit and my stratosphere. I need to feel the love of them directly. I love them so much. I love Kim and Brianna. Fuck. I love women. Speaking of women, uh for the love of Supernatural, that convention happening in Manchester in the UK next February. I'm locked in, guys. And they have women going. I'm so excited. Of the five guests that they've announced at the time that I'm posting this, two of them are women. That's 40%. We are so fucking back. We are so fucking back, guys. I'm not naming any names, but I'm just gonna say that some conventions recently have felt a bit like a penis fest. Am I wrong? Thank God. I I want more women at For the Love of Supernatural, so bad. I want them there, so bad. I'm seeing Elena and Sam. I'm literally foaming at the mouth with joy. I'm so overjoyed to be seeing Elena and Sam. I haven't seen Elena since last like fucking November. Good lord, I miss her. And I'm staying with a friend of mine while I'm out there, and we're actually gonna go and visit a bunch of like the One Direction sites, because I've always been a big One Direction fangirl. So I'm gonna do do my One Direction fill. Finally. Good Lord, I've been wanting to do this for like 14 friggin' years. It's I've waited long enough. Other than the Kim and Brianna Mementis event, I think my next con type thing is actually probably gonna be Fan Expo Boston, which I that also reminds me of that. I have to actually apply for my press pass for that. Oh fuck, I probably should have done that. Well, I have until July. I'm fine. Oh, it's almost July. Fuck. Okay, after I finish recording this podcast, we're gonna go do that. We're gonna do it. Because not only are a ton of people from the Cast of the Boys gonna be there, but a ton of people from Twilight are gonna be there, and it's pretty close to me. I can stay with a friend of mine that lives nearby. It's gonna be great. And I'm not super concerned about like whether or not I'm gonna get approved because the weekend ended last year at Fan Expo Boston, and they emailed me and they were like, hey, next year we'd love to have you. So I'm really, I'm I really think I'm gonna be all set with that as soon as I hit in the application. It's gonna be so good to see Kellen Lutz, too. I love him. I adore him. I'm actually posting a video about him today. I he's so sweet. I've met him, I think, three or four times now, and he now like sees me and he's like, Oh, it's good to see you. Hi. Like, he's so cute. I think he and Tyler Posey were the first, like, non-supernatural people to be like, oh my god, I know you. They were the first ones. Okay, as always, let's end off with the question bit. Yay! I love the question bit. You guys know how much I love it. You guys always ask the best questions. I don't always say this every month, but you guys ask me the best questions, stuff that I would not think to talk about. So it's just very helpful. As always, you can submit questions for the question bit by emailing bestie.emmy at gmail.com or every single Saturday on my Instagram story, I do a QA and I pull questions from there to answer on here, usually the ones at the end of the month. So keep an eye out there. First question is from B Blossom Edits. Hello, love your name. That's so cute. Uh, you want to know underrated TV show rex? Happy to provide. Absolutely just gutturally happy to offer this to you. Do me a favor, go over to Hulu, okay? Type in a little search bar, The Last Man on Earth. You're probably gonna see a picture of Will Forte, okay? You're gonna go ahead, you're gonna hit play on the pilot, and you're gonna then you're gonna watch four full seasons, okay? That's what you're gonna do. I will warn you, it ends on a cliffhanger because for some reason it didn't get picked up for another season, but it's so good. I love that show. Particularly the first three seasons are awesome. I'm gonna I also have to warn you though, you are going to hate Phil. You're gonna hate him. Will Forte's character. You're gonna think he's the most insufferable, annoying person in the entire world. Yes, rock with that. Rock with that feeling, okay? It's really fun to watch. It's a great show. It's really interesting, especially because like I think they canceled this show right before COVID came out. And it's about a virus that took over the world and killed literally everybody. And it's this one guy, Will Forte's character, who's the last man on earth. Or is he? Or is he the last man on earth? I'm not gonna spoil things for you. No way, but it's so good. I recommend it to everyone. No one watches it. Every time I recommend it to someone, they don't watch it. So if you don't watch it, that's fine. I won't take it personally. But it's a really cool show and it's a really interesting concept, and it's I don't know, it's just intro it's funny. It's a funny show. Lord knows we all need to laugh right now. Hot moti. My cat is back. Hi, munch munch. Do you want to say hi to everyone? Say hi. She doesn't want to say hello. No, you just want to sit. Okay, she's sitting now. She's at she's having podcast time with me. Sometimes, if I don't put this microphone away, she'll sit in front of it like she's recording a podcast, and I call it her podcast time. Guys, let me know if you want a mochi exclusive. She's wildly inconsistent, though, I must warn you. She actually just left again. Moach moch! Honey. Okay. Okay, locking in again. Shay asked me how I deal with anxiety and huge life shifts. Cause you're anxious about campus film school. Oh my goodness. First of all, congratulations. That's so cool. But I definitely understand where you're coming from. I feel like there's a weird amount of anxiety that comes with transition because it feels like you don't have a place to land. Like if you're in the middle of a transition, it's very difficult to settle somewhere or into something. Because you're waiting, right? You're waiting to settle into your new thing. Think of like when you're moving, like the process of packing and moving is such a nightmare. Because it's like, where do I fucking live? That's where it is with all transitions. That's just the most literal example that can come to mind. My advice and what I try to do in times like that, and maybe this is just me being really, really neurodivergent, but I really lean into schedules. Well, maybe not schedules, but like routines, I guess is a better word. I really try to lean into routines so that way, even if I'm going from one thing to the next, there is something that's consistent there. Whether it's even if it's just me washing my face with the same face wash every day, there's something consistent there. So not everything feels upended as you change. And let this is gonna sound weird, but let you comfort yourself. Like do the things that are going to comfort you and like acknowledge that your time is hectic right now and you're in a transition and everything is insane. Let yourself take care of you in ways that maybe you wouldn't normally. That's my advice. That's what I try to do in those times. Clarice asked me if I have any tips for taking good photos of yourself. And honestly, I think I might. Like, I think I do. Please note, I am not a professional photographer. Uh, absolutely not. But I take a lot of pictures and videos of myself through the internet and just being doing modeling type things and all kinds of stuff. So I feel like I have a little bit of experience in this area. I will say, I'm flattered that you think I have experience in this area. Thank you for asking for my guidance. This is actually something that everyone's beloved favorite photographer, Christopher Schmelke, says very often, and that's like get angles from high up. Like, don't don't give yourself a chin shot, baby girl. Go up. Everyone looks better from a higher level. So start there. And lighting is so key. Lighting is so, so, so, so, so key. And I'm not talking you have to get like professional lights or whatever, but like turn towards a window. Get yourself somewhere that's lit well to take pictures. Because people will often, I think, take pictures of themselves in lighting that maybe isn't the best for them. And they'll be like, Well, I don't take good pictures, or I look terrible in this picture, and maybe that's not you. Maybe it's the shadow. Maybe the shadow is making your face look different. Think in like movies where they do like uncanny valley makeup, where it's like you can hide things and make things scary in shadows. Maybe your lighting just isn't working. If you find better lighting, oftentimes you can get a really good shot. And then the last thing I'm gonna say is practice in the mirror. I'm so sorry that I can't give you less embarrassing advice, but that's the truth. Stand in front of a mirror, sit in front of a mirror, hold a mirror up to your face, whatever, and practice like faces that you think could work. Because that's like it's a very intimate act, right? Figuring out what you think looks good, smiling wise, those different types of things. It's a very intimate act, and it's hard to do when a camera's already in front of you. It's hard to do when someone's already pointing a camera at you and you're just like, oh fuck. Because now you don't know what to do. Find those faces when you're alone and you're not nervous, so that way when the camera's in front of you, your face knows what to do. Like you can just go to that feeling in your face. Like, figure f this is so stupid. Find the feeling physically when you find a face that works for you in the mirror. And when cameras are around, lean into that, lean into the physical sensations of that. Does that make sense? I don't know if that makes sense. I think a lot of this is coming across really autistic in the way that I'm talking about feeling my face physically with like the muscle. I don't know. Okay, I think I'm just gonna call it that. I think. Thank you guys so much for listening to the yapping bit this month. As always, I'm always so in awe. I see, by the way. I see like when people listen. So, like, if you're listening, please know I I'm aware. And it means so much to me because I literally set aside like a day at the end of each month to do this. And like, I don't have to. Like, I if you guys weren't listening to it and talking to me about it and being as invested in it as you have been, I like would skip a month if I wasn't feeling it. Like, I've been kind of anxious this month, and I almost was like, man, like, should I? And then, but it's just like I, you know, I love talking to you guys, and it's so good for me. I hope it's as good for you guys as it is as it is for me. And I know that sounds like we just had a one night stand, but how else am I supposed to end the podcast? I love you guys so much. Stay yes Whoa, hold on. No, I'm not gonna stop it. I'm not we're no, we're going with it. Stay sexy, stay yappy, keep the bits up, guys, and I will talk to you next month. Love you.