The Journey to Joy

Finding Joy That Lasts: Beyond the Dopamine Hit

Ever cried at Disney World—the "happiest place on earth"? Pastor Tim shares a vulnerable moment from his youth that reveals a profound truth: you can't manufacture real, lasting joy.

In this message, we dive into Jesus' teaching from John 15 about the vine and branches, discovering that authentic joy isn't found in the next shopping trip, vacation, or dopamine hit from scrolling our phones. Instead, Jesus offers us something deeper—an unshakable joy that stays with you even on Monday mornings, in traffic, and through life's hardest moments.

Drawing from six years of church planting in Toronto, Tim unpacks how joy transforms when we flip our priorities: Jesus first, others second, yourself last. You'll hear the story of John and Cora—a couple whose lives were changed by a simple act of helping them move—and discover how serving others shifts our perspective from "I have to" to "I get to."

If you've ever felt like something's wrong with you because you can't just "be happy," this message is for you. Learn why cultivating joy takes time (like a vineyard that needs 6-7 years to produce mature fruit), and discover practical steps to remain in Jesus and experience the complete joy He promises.

Key Takeaway: Real joy doesn't come from perfect circumstances—it comes from remaining connected to Jesus and living outward toward others.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hey everyone, and welcome to the brand new Burnett Church podcast. My name is Tim, and I'm your host and the pastor of Burnett Church. Today's podcast uh is the audio from part one of our series called Reactions Speak Louder, in which we start to unpack how our reactions affect the world around us and also say something about our relationship to ourselves and to Jesus as well. We hope you enjoy the episode. When I was 13 years old, our family took what felt at the time like the most epic trip of my life. The one trip every family longs to take. To that magical place. Yes, but I was in the East, so it was Disney World. Right. To Florida, which I had no idea was Southern America when I went. It's an interesting thing to come to a realization of. But to Disney World. We didn't have a lot when I was a kid. But we managed to, for several years with another family that we were in relationship with, scrimp and save our pennies. You know, ours, meaning my mom and dad's, I had nothing to do with it. You know, scrimp and save their pennies so that we could take this one vacation together as a family with our friends. We all piled into a 1985 Dodge caravan with wood paneling down the sides. And drove from Nova Scotia to Florida. Seven people in a seven-passenger van. It was amazing. I remember a lot of things about that trip. It sticks out of my mind. I remember um the Charlotte Hornets hat I bought when I was in the Carolinas. You know those sweet ones that were like a purple and green? If you're from the 90s, if you know you know, um, you know, teal green was the color of the 90s. I bought one of those for the first time. You know, I remember getting to buy the most expensive shoes that I owned as a kid. Most of the time my shoes came from Zellers. Most of the time they were, they were, you know, um uh generic brands from uh from department stores. But on that trip, my big treat was a pair of Reebok pumps. I know. I know. Yeah. I was still in my uh hip-hop music phase at that point. I hadn't picked up the guitar yet or you know, sort of learned that um guitars are cool. Um so these were like the coolest thing I ever owned. I remember my Uncle Bobby refusing to put anything but shorts on once we crossed into North Carolina. We went to lunch that first day in North Carolina, it was 10 degrees Celsius. And everybody in America knew that my Uncle Bobby was from Canada and not from America. Bobby didn't care though. He was in the South and he was gonna wear his shorts. That was his determination. Did you know what I remember the most? I remember crying in the middle of Disney World. And I can't tell you why I did that. It wasn't from an overflow of joy. I was genuinely upset about something. And that really shouldn't be possible, should it? Like Disney World is called what, the happiest place on earth? Yeah, everything there is designed to hit your dopamine center and give you a shot over and over and over again. You are there to feel happy, and yet here I am, 13 years old in my Reebok pumps, crying. And it was one of the first times I realized this truth. You can't manufacture joy. You can try to create the perfect environment, you can have all the right circumstances and still feel sad. Which is counter to the messaging I think we have around us about joy, right? I think I think that the the message that we're fed all the time is just keep making your own joy. If you're sad, shopping therapy is available to you, right? Or pick up your phone, scroll some funny cat videos. That'll bring you some joy, right? Watch a show, have a snack, right? All things that I do, and I know you do too, and they have their place, and I admit pretty freely that for a little while it can help you feel good. But this morning I want us to have a conversation about joy that goes deeper than that. Because I'm not just looking for my next dopamine hit, right? I'm looking for something deeper than that, and I think you are too. I think we're asking ourselves questions like, how do I have joy on Monday morning? How do I have joy in traffic? How do I have joy when I'm feeling stressed out, under pressure, or disappointed? The real question isn't, can you have joy? It's can I live with joy consistently? So over the next couple of months, we're we're gonna be in the middle of this series where we're exploring a question: what does our world need now? And back on Easter Sunday, I made the suggestion that things can grow out of us that the world needs, that we need, when we choose to trust the way of Jesus. And this is something that I think everybody can at least try on. If you're here and you're you don't have a faith in Jesus, you're you're exploring, you're trying to figure it out. The good news is you don't have to believe all of this to try some of it. And maybe by trying some of it and taking some steps, and we find what's required for belief. We're talking about, you know, deepening our definition of spirituality. Because what our world needs now isn't just more opinions or more all about me buffet style spirituality. It needs something that's more tested, more robust. Last week we talked about needing it to be more mature. What I think the world needs is more people who look like Jesus. That's what we're exploring. And at one point in the New Testament, the Apostle Paul gives us a picture of what people who are becoming like Jesus look like. And really, as we explored last week, it's it's what does love look like when it's fleshed out in the world? Right? Things like joy and peace, patience and kindness become our normal experience of life under those circumstances. But I want you to know, we're not compiling a list of things that I think you need to try harder to achieve. It's not a checklist, it's not a collection. If you catch them all, you know, like Pokemon, if you catch them all, you don't just get to go, oh, I won the game. This is great. That's not how it goes. It is a growing sense of multiple life characteristics over the course of time. What they are really is evidence of a life that has become connected to Jesus. And I'm gonna say something this morning before I go too far. I know that we're all in different places when it comes to experiencing joy, and some of us don't feel like we have very much of it. And I want you to know that it's not a you problem. It's not a willpower problem. Right? We've all probably asked ourselves at some point when joy is low, what's wrong with me? Why don't I feel the way I'm supposed to feel? Why can't I just be happy? I've asked those questions of myself. I imagine many of you have too. And it it's it's intense. It's a problem we try desperately to fix. Although too often I think what we do is we try to manufacture joy. Maybe I just need a different job. Maybe I need to enter into a new relationship. Maybe, maybe I just need to go to Mexico. Which I admit makes me feel pretty good. Maybe if I just had a little bit more money, I could afford to go to Mexico. Wouldn't that be nice? You know? And so we start rearranging our lives, trying to manufacture joy. And truthfully, it probably does feel joy-filled for a little while, but not that enduring sense of resilient joy that some people talk about having. And then we just start blaming ourselves or something else again. The problem, I think, is that we're looking for joy in things, people, and places that can create a dopamine hit for sure, can make you feel something, but don't stay with you after the chemical reaction goes down. And today I just I would like to invite you to consider with me a different pursuit of joy. One that secures us in joy for the long haul. So if you have a Bible with you, either digitally or analog, you can open it up now to John chapter 15. We're gonna start at verse 5. If you don't, that's cool. We've got this giant screen here, and we'll put the words up there. So this is what Jesus says at the beginning of John chapter 15. I am the vine, and you are the branches. Can we get a picture of a vine and branches here? Okay. So Jesus is referring to a vineyard, a grape-producing plant for the purposes of making wine. Maybe you've had the opportunity to go and actually tour a vineyard before. So maybe you know some of this, but but what we see here is a trunk, right, that's firmly attached into the ground with all the root system going on under the ground. And the unique thing about grape vines is that at some point they come up and then and then they split. And so if you look at what's going on here, this is really still part of the main trunk, right? You know, where trees keep going straight up and then they create their branches. Grape vines can be manipulated in such a way that they'll kind of keep that going on a linear path. It makes it very easy to harvest the grapes that you mean to produce. Okay? So all of this is the vine, right? And and what Jesus says is I'm the vine and you are the branches. You are uh you are connected to me. You're an offshoot of me, but but you're not you're not me, right? So the unique thing about a branch is that if you cut off a branch, what happens to it? It will die if you don't replant it and create a new plant out of it. But for the sake of the analogy, let's just stick with Jesus for a quick second. Right? If you cut off a branch, it will die. So Jesus says, I am the source of life. Right? We're alive, living, but we're dependent on Jesus for some things. Okay? We're dependent on God. This is how the story of us begins, right? We're formed out of dust, okay? And whether you believe this is literally how it happened or a metaphor for how it happened, you know, we're formed, but then we're not alive, the Bible says, until God breathes into us. And Paul echoes this later. He says, you know, we are we are dependent on God for life and breath and everything else. Without him, life cease to exist. So if you remain in me, right? Jesus is saying, if you if you stay here with me, in this one place, okay? You got any homebodies in the crowd? Anyone who just loves being at home, anybody who's lived in the same place for a long period of time, you know? I was talking to my friends here this morning and asked them, Gordy and Sharon, how long have you lived in the house that you're living in now? And they said, 33 years. I haven't lived 33 months in very many places in my life, especially my adult life. Melissa and I embarrassingly are like the opposite of homebodies. There was a point in our life where we had moved more times than we had been married, and this was when we were in marriage years in the double digits. Okay? Like one year we moved from St. Thomas to London, from London to Detroit, from Detroit to Ajax, and from Ajax to Toronto, all in the same year. I know. Too much. We are trying to fix this problem that we have in our life. Gratefully, we're very happy to be here with all of you. Jesus is saying, Tim and Melissa do the opposite of what you're inclined to do when it comes to housing. Remain in a set place. Remain in me. Stay. Become at home with me. Right? Make a home with me where you stay. And if you do that, you will bear much fruit. Remember, all these things that we're talking about are fruits of the Spirit of Jesus living and working in us. Right? And Jesus warns, though, apart from me, you can do nothing. Now, he doesn't like mean nothing, nothing. He means nothing as it relates to the fruit of the Spirit. Okay, so the kind of joy that Jesus is talking about, the kind of peace and patience, goodness and kindness and faithfulness and self-control, all of those things, you can't produce that in the measure that I mean for you to produce it. The measure that the Father and I designed life for you to produce that, you cannot do that on your own. Apart from me, that's not possible. Apart from me, the best you can hope for is manufacturing moments through dopamine hits. Right? Not this abiding, deep-rooted sense of unshakable joy that stays with you even when you get cut off in traffic. Remaining in Jesus, though, isn't it isn't a mystical thing. It's actually beautiful in its simplicity. It's relational. It's something that you and I are made for, crave, need this connection with others. And so in your life with Jesus, it looks like paying attention to the fact that he's with you in the mundane and simple moments of life. It's having an ongoing prayer conversation with him. You know, some people are really great at like, you know, being prayer warriors and sitting down for long periods of time and having long and deep conversations with Jesus. I think it's something we should aspire to. But if any of you are like me and have some measure of ADHD in your life, you can understand that that's not how you're wired. I've always been a fan of the story of Brother Lawrence, who prayed as he went about the simple tasks of his life, whether he was sweeping or cooking, that he had an ongoing conversation. You know, Paul said, pray without ceasing. This is what I think it looks like. I think it looks like not just I talk to God when I have, you know, the perfect conditions and the candles are lit and the house is empty and I get time to myself, but having this ongoing, abiding conversation with God. Remaining in Jesus looks like taking steps of trust, which good news, all of you are doing because you're here this morning. Taking some steps of trust to allow Him to influence the way that we behave. And we know that it's working when it challenges some of the assumptions that we make, some of the instincts that we have about how we use our money, or how we uh prioritize our relationships, or where our sense of self is rooted. It's choosing his way over our impulses. It's building a life with Jesus, not just visiting him on occasion. In verse 8, Jesus continues, it is to my Father's glory that you bear fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples. Guys, I think this is super important. If you're here and you're a follower of Jesus already, can you tune in with me for a second? You know that sometimes I get a little bit um anxious about the way that the church interacts with the world. The way sometimes the Christians choose to interact with other people, you know, like if you've been here a while, you've heard me say, guys, can you just don't be weird, okay? Just don't start there. Don't be weird, okay? You know, but but I think it goes obviously quite a bit deeper than that. I think that there is a there is a fundamental problem with the expectations that people outside of here have with us, and I think it's on us to fix it, right? So as you pursue this life with Jesus, right? What's supposed to happen is the people around you should recognize the work of God in your life and be able to give him some measure of credit for what's going on in your life, or at least ask you and give you the opportunity of their own free will for you to say, man, Jesus means so much to me. I would love to tell you about that. Right? It's to God's glory that we live in this way when we remain in Jesus, and he brings fruit up out of our life, because that proves beyond our words, that we are actually followers of Jesus and not just cultural Christians. Right? Don't look spiritual. We talked about this last week. Look like Jesus. Become mature like Jesus. Verse 9, he says, As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you. Remain in my love. This isn't a transaction that Jesus is inviting you to, right? It's a long-term relationship. A relationship built on the foundation of his love. Right? It is like, I mean, it's supposed to be like anyway, as you as you mature in your understanding of your relationship with Jesus, like a marriage, right? At some point, when you decide to get married, you do what? This is part of our marriage, forsaking all others, right? Committed to one. Committed to one. And that's where I think this rubs up against sometimes the definition of spirituality that our culture wants to give us, right? Oh, it's okay, you can follow this guy and this guy and this guy and this guy. Except Jesus doesn't invite you to that. The problem is as soon as you start doing that, you aren't actually following Jesus anymore. You're following something Jesus said, but you're not following Jesus. So, like, if you haven't made a commitment to Jesus, go at it, right? But for those of us who have made a commitment to Jesus, understand he is asking us to come to him and to commit to him in a way that is not unlike a marriage vow, right? Remain in me. Stay with me, make your home with me. Sometimes submit to me, which we believe is a mutual thing between husband and wife. Why? Ah, you'll find if you do, it's what's best for you and what's best for the people around you. Right? Because who doesn't need more kindness in their world? Who doesn't need more faithfulness, reliability, steadfastness? These are all words that you could use in play. Of some of the words that Jesus uses. Why? Or sorry, how do we make that commitment? How do we show our commitment? Jesus says, if you keep my commands, you will remain in my love. And this is, you know, where people have a problem. Jesus says, if you do what I say, then you'll remain. Remaining looks like being faithful to the things that I ask you to do. You know? And I understand, maybe, like, maybe that's uncomfortable to us sometimes. But like, if Jesus is God, if anybody has the right to say, like, do what I say, it should be him, right? Like, if that's true, then one's true, and you don't have to believe that's true, but if you do believe that's true, then you would want to do what he says. Right? Just as I have kept the Father's commands. Like, I've already shown you what it looks like. So remain in my love as I remain in the Father's love. Right? And I don't want you to hear in that, keep my commands so that you remain worthy of my love. That isn't what he's saying. Right? Your love, his love is given to you freely. Okay? That's a momentary moment, which is really redundant. It's an invitation, right? To submit to the fact that his commands are what's best for you. To trust him in that. And he says in verse 12, My command is this: love one another as I have loved you. Right? Love one another. The command is not super complicated. Love one another as I have loved you. Turn your attention outwards, in other words. If you were here last week, less me more we. That's the command. The command is to show love to others in the way of Jesus. And in verse 11, he tells you why he said all of this. I have told you this, so that my joy may be in you, and your joy may be complete. Mature. Right? Like Jesus' joy stayed with him as he walked himself to the cross for you and for me. That's way harder to do than keep joy on Monday morning. Way harder to do than to keep joy when somebody cuts you off in traffic. Way harder to do than keeping joy when your kids are naughty. Right? Like if we understand what the journey towards the cross was, if Jesus can maintain joy in that moment, and he offers it to you, why would we not choose to root our joy in him? The secret to long-lasting joy is to do the things that Jesus has asked, to remain in him, to abide in him, to make your home in him, to submit to him, so that in his unwavering joy, you will have unwavering joy. Which leads us back to palindromes. If you were here at the beginning of the service, I asked people if they're familiar with palindromes. If you were late, you missed that part, sorry. We tend to treat joy like a palindrome, even though it's not. Right? Functionally, functionally speaking, we tend to treat joy like this. You can find joy if you take care of yourself first, others next, and give Jesus some room if he's got any left. Right? We think if I can just get the circumstances of my life right, then I'll have joy. So it brings us back to that, trying to orchestrate the moments, the enough moments to feel like we're constantly fed into by all of these things that are in our life. If I can get all that lined up, just like at Disney World, then I'll have joy. Trying to find the next thing that gives us the next hit of our next joy-filled experience, the next shining object, the next encounter, the next experience. But all of that leads us to comparison, frustration, and burnout. Trying too hard, that lifestyle does not deliver. We are a people living through an epidemic of loneliness and depression. The more we go looking for joy in all of those other places, it seems like the less and less we find, the more we open ourselves up to a life that just doesn't work. So Jesus would encourage you to flip joy around and pursue Him first, others second, and yourself last. That's the right order for joy. Jesus first, others second, yourself last. When Jesus is your focus and your life begins to move outward towards others, something inside you shifts. And I know that this is true because I've experienced it in my own life. Melissa and I spent six years in Toronto trying to build up a church from nothing. When we went there, our church was like her and I and our two-year-old daughter. We did this crazy thing called church planting that I kind of recommend, and on another end, I don't. Because it's hard. And everybody tries to tell you it's hard. But if you're crazy enough to do it, you believe it's not that hard for me. Because I'm special and I will succeed. When we moved to Toronto, I had all these ideas about what our church would look like, and one of them was that we would be a cool church.

unknown 28:25

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SPEAKER_00 28:26

You know, like everybody would be cool. All of you are so cool. But like we had uncool people at our church in Toronto. There was this one couple that came to us because um because we helped them move. So I got this phone call on this Friday afternoon from one of the small groups, we were probably like 12 people meeting for Bible study in our house at this point. And this person calls and I said, Hey, I have these friends who are moving into downtown, and I think they would love to be a part of our community. Do you think that we could help them move tomorrow? Saturday morning at 8 a.m. I was not excited about the prospect of doing this. Because I have moved enough. I told you this already. When people say, Do you want to help me move? I know what you mean. You know? I know what you mean. And it's not as easy as you're gonna make it out to seem. The last time somebody came to help us move, some lady had to move my underwear drawer for me. And that wasn't cool. You know? Um I didn't ask her to do it, but she jumped in and did it anyway. I won't tell you who it is because some of you know who she is. Stuff like that happens when you help people move. It's not easy. And you go home feeling very sore and tired. But I felt very guilty because here we were in Toronto trying to convince people you should give your life to Jesus and you should serve others in Jesus' name, you should do this thing, we'll be a community, it'll be awesome. Do you want to help me move? No. No, I don't. But we went and we helped. You've heard me talk about this couple several times, and this should lead you to my point if you've been going here for a while. If you haven't, their names are John and Korah. Wonderful people. Because we helped John and Kora move, we were able to help John build a relationship with Jesus that he didn't have before. They both, unlike the one public baptism our church ever had, got spontaneously baptized. Which, if you've ever been in a place where somebody just gets up out of their seat and says, I'm going to commit my life to Jesus and gets baptized spontaneously, like that is pretty much the coolest church service you can ever go to. It's amazing to just see somebody like all of a sudden the light came on, I'm ready to commit myself, we make a big mess. I think they had to go home on transit wet that day because they didn't bring clothes with them. I was thinking about that this week. I'm like, I wonder how they got home because we didn't we didn't come prepared with extra clothes. John and Cora got baptized, started serving in our church, I got to marry them, I got to uh meet their son, uh, and and they are now working at a church in in Newfoundland. Like, like they are, when I look back on Toronto, and and and Melissa and I had somewhat different experiences of Toronto. I think, you know, in in a lot of ways it was probably tougher for her than it was for me, but it wasn't easy for either of us. You know, when I think back on my days there, though, I don't think about the hard stuff. I think about John and Cora. All the time. More than I should think of these two wonderfully, beautifully awkward human beings that I get to call friends. Joy turns I have to into I get to. It turns envy into contentment. Root yourself in Jesus, and you will stop playing the comparison game with your neighbors and your coworkers and your friends. You will stop feeling like, oh my gosh, I don't have enough because I don't have that thing. Joy has the potential to turn your greed into jealousy. When Jesus calls you to live your life and to give it to others, you start to live a life that's bigger than yourself. And suddenly, the next shiny object pales in comparison to the impact you could have by investing in somebody else's life. The opportunity for us to band together and offer people hope and healing becomes more important than your shiny new car, which is just the personal one for me. Joy, in other words, turns fear into faith. Even when life's scariest moments, even when life's soul-sucking times, Monday morning, in traffic, just got cut off, it is possible to still have joy. Jesus stays with us, reminds us that God has never left or forsaken you, and that his plans ultimately will never fail. A life dedicated to cultivating that kind of growth is the kind of life our world needs right now. As I was preparing for this week and looking into this analogy of vineyards, I didn't realize how long it takes for a vineyard to become mature enough to actually produce fruit. You plant a vine, and for the first couple years, nothing. No fruit. In fact, if things start to grow, we cut them off. Which feels backwards and harsh until you realize why, because the goal isn't immature fruit. The goal is strong roots. So by year three, you might get something, but it's not great. Year four and five. Now it's starting to look like a proper vine. Year six and seven, you're actually producing fruit that is meant for the purpose that you're growing it. Real, consistent, healthy fruit. It takes time. So I want you to know that if you're new on this journey, or you've been on this journey for a while, and you don't feel like you're producing the kind of fruit that you want to produce, it doesn't mean that God's not at work to produce fruit in your life. Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Cultivating joy takes time. Right? Just because you don't see it yet doesn't mean nothing is happening. Just because it's slow doesn't mean it's not working. God is growing something in you that can actually last. And I wish I had better news for you, but you can't manufacture joy. But you can trust in Jesus. Make your home with him. Remain in Him. So this morning, as we as we leave, as we get ready, I'm gonna invite our musicians to come back. And I just want you to consider look, what if the things that you've been depending on for joy are the reason you haven't been experiencing very much joy? What if the things you're chasing aren't the things you need to chase? What if actually slowing down, dialing it back, staying in one place is exactly what you need. If you're new to all this or you need a reset, here are a couple things I would suggest you could do this week. Start small, five minutes a day, have a conversation with Jesus. Open up your Bible or your Bible app. Sit quietly. Talk to God, read some verses, pray. It's not rocket science. If you were trying to repair a relationship with somebody in your house, you would set aside time for the right. Cultivate your relationship with Jesus. Stop trying to manufacture your choice. Let's pray together. Jesus, we confess it's counterintuitive to us to stop in order to. So God, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we ask you to help us. Spend time.