🎙️S2 EP7 The Two Most Dangerous Men

There are two types of men who can change the trajectory of your life—and not in a good way.

A man driven by lust will risk everything for a temporary feeling.

A man who was abandoned by his mother may struggle to trust, receive, and sustain real love.

And when those wounds go unhealed…

They  don’t just affect him

They affect every woman he encounters.

In this episode, we break down:

• Why some men sabotage good relationships
• The psychology behind emotional unavailability
• How childhood wounds show up in adult love
• Why you cannot out-love an unhealed man
• How to recognize patterns before they cost you your peace

This is not about blaming men.

This is about awareness, healing, and choosing better for yourself.

If you’ve ever loved someone who couldn’t love you properly…

This conversation will hit differently.

relationships advice women healing trauma emotional intelligence toxic relationships narcissist recovery dating psychology self worth mindset growth unhealthy relationships attachment styles relationship patterns

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Just Daphne, and we are going to have a conversation today. Let's talk about something real today. Not surface level, not sugar coated, but real. There are two types of men that can be dangerous. Not because they were born that way, but because they were shaped that way. A lustful man and a man who was abandoned by his mother. And if we're honest, when those two things intersect, that is where you see the most damage. This isn't about bashing men. No, I love men. This is about understanding patterns so you don't ignore red flags and can cost you your peace, your purpose, and even your safety. Let's start with the lustful man. A lustful man is driven not by purpose, not by vision, but by appetite. An appetite has no loyalty. He will risk everything: his family, his future, his finances, his reputation, for a moment of pleasure that has no substance at all. And here's the part people don't want me to say out loud. It's not always about the woman, it's about what she represents: excitement, escape, ego validation. Some of these men aren't looking for love. They're looking for stimulation. They get bored. And instead of building, they start chasing. Instead of investing, they start entertaining distractions. And that's why you'll see a man go from stability to chaos. From a good woman to a situation that drains him. From purpose to survival, all over something temporary. Can you imagine giving up a permanent job to work at a temp agency? Because lust doesn't calculate consequences. Now, I want you all to know that I am an author. And if you've ever loved someone who hurt you or stayed longer than you should have, my book, How I Survived a Narcissist, is for you. It's not just a story, it's a roadmap to recognizing manipulation, breaking cycles, and choosing yourself again. Available now on Amazon. Now let's go back. Let's go a little deeper. The man abandoned by his mother. This one is different. Because this wound doesn't just sit in his mind, it sits in his identity. A mother is a child's first experience of love. She teaches a son how to feel safe, how to receive affection, how to trust woman, how to interpret care. So when their mother leaves, it doesn't just create sadness, it creates confusion. How can the woman who carried me to be the one who left me? That question never disappears. It settles in his heart and it becomes his lens. Now let's be clear. Many of these men, they were still loved. Grandmothers stepped in, aunties stepped in, and caregivers stepped in. And they did an incredible job. They provided, they nurtured, they protected. But there is something psychologically profound about rejection from the one who carried you. Because it rewrites how you now see women. Now love feels inconsistent. Now trust feels risky. Now attachment feels dangerous. So what y'all think he's gonna do? He's gonna either avoid emotional death or sabotage what is real. Because deep down he's still trying to protect that wounded boy. Now let's connect the two lust and abandonment. This is where it gets dangerous. Because now you have a man who craves validation, distrustability, and is emotionally unhealed. So what y'all think he's gonna do? He's gonna chase what feels good instead of what is good. There's a difference. He entertains women who require nothing because accountability feels like pressure. He gravitates towards environments that are fun but not fruitful. You'll hear it all the time. These men will tell you, I'm married or I live with someone, but I'm bored. I don't love her anymore. The love is gone. That's the common denominator, boredom. Not lack of opportunity, not lack of a good woman. Something as simple as boredom. Because healing requires discipline, but distraction, it feels so easy. It's just la la land. And this is how you see men leave. They leave loyal women, they leave stable homes, and they leave healthy relationships because they no longer know how a healthy relationship looks for chaos and excitement for something with no substance. Now, you guys know that I'm an author. If you're in a season of rebuilding, healing, and reconnecting with God, ha! Midnight Train to God is your next step. This isn't just a book, it's a spiritual reset. It's available now through Amazon and Ingram. Now let's address the real question. Will he always be like this? No. But guess what? In order for him to change, he has to acknowledge it first. Just like a woman who has been abandoned by her father, they have to confront her wounds. A man has to confront this. We hear it all the time. Yeah, my mom left when I was little, but my grandma raised me. You know, it is what it is. Healing is not automatic, it's intentional. He has to recognize the pattern, take accountability, and do the internal work. And doing the internal work requires you to sit by yourself and trust me, it's a challenge. But if he doesn't, it festers. And what festers spreads. That's when he becomes dangerous. Not to others, but to himself, because he will sabotage every good thing that comes into his life. Move closer, real quick. I want y'all to move a little bit closer. Just just just move closer. And this is where I need you to listen carefully. Some of these men will find incredible women. You know, them ride and die chicks. Women who love deeply, sacrifice endlessly and show up consistently. These women will sell all their organs and their body so this man can live. And they will give up everything to a man who is not him. And guess what? He'll still leave. Not because she wasn't enough, but because he wasn't ready. You cannot outlove unhealed trauma. Let me say that again. You cannot outlove unhealed trauma. So be very careful because no weapon can protect you from a man who is driven by lust or a man who is still bleeding from abandonment and refuses to heal. This isn't about fear, this is about awareness. Pay attention to patterns, not just potential, because who a person is will always reveal itself. And if you're listening to this and you recognize yourself in it, this is your moment not to feel shame, but to choose healing from the inside out. Thank you guys again for listening to Just Daphne. Hit that like button and please comment. Bye for now.