“I Can’t Solo Travel” — Yes You F*cking Can

I dare you to book that trip ✈️

This episode is your sign to stop waiting for the perfect timing, the perfect person, or the perfect version of yourself before you start living your life

We’re talking about the fear of solo travel, why it feels so terrifying and how travelling alone can completely transform your confidence, self-trust and relationship with yourself

From loneliness, nervous system growth and learning to enjoy your own company, to 6 practical tips for first-time solo travellers, this is the episode every girl needs to hear before booking the flight

Because maybe the life you want is waiting on the other side of one brave decision and I promise you, it's worth it

Come and connect with me on socials @thegoodgirlrebellionpodcast⁩ for more on cyclical living, magick, feminine energy, and coming back to your rhythm ✌🏼

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I really do believe that every single woman should solo travel at least once in their life. Because there is nothing like meeting the true you completely alone on the other side of the world. And I'm not talking about solo travel in an Instagram aesthetic kind of way. I'm talking about the kind of way where you just take yourself on a trip that you've always wanted to go on because then you actually understand that you are very fucking capable and you can do it alone. There is a version of you out there that no one else has ever met, including yourself. Because Snowdo Travel allows you to not only step into a new version of yourself that the environment that you then put yourself in allows you to be, it also allows you to be a version of yourself that has no past experience, no future expectations, nothing tied to them. It is just you and who you want to be in that moment, who you want to become in that place. And I think there is something incredibly beautiful about understanding that you can do the hard thing. You can do hard things on your own. You can figure it out and you can have a fucking good time doing it. Hello and welcome to the Good Girl Rebellion Podcast. I'm your host, Izzy, and I am so grateful to have you here on another episode. The Good Girl Rebellion is all about reclaiming your rhythm in mind, body, and spirit. Each week we are unraveling years of conditioning to reclaim a wild, rebellious, and intuitive truth. So if you're ready to reclaim your power, reconnect with your wildest self and rise as the woman you were never taught to be, you're in the right place. Welcome to the rebellion. And welcome. I thought nothing better to talk about on my first video in my new location on the Sunshine Coast in Australia, solo, than solo traveling. Having the balls to solo travel, because it's something that I think I take for granted that I've done so many times. Because for me, it just feels so normal now to get on a plane, to go to a different country, to meet new people, to put myself in a completely unknown environment that I take for granted that so many other people actually are terrified by this concept. It is a terrifying concept, but the more you do it, the more you understand that you can do it and you are very capable. And yeah, I just want to give you the confidence in this episode. So we'll talk about some of the things that hold people back, some of the tips and tricks I'm gonna give you to actually grow the balls you need to book that first solo trip and just go and do it. Because solo travel will change your life, it has well and truly changed mine. And there is no greater gift, I think, than travel in this world. That is a hill I will die on. Something that I will always stand by is that I have learned more traveling the world than I have ever learned through the school system and work, really. So I think one of the reasons that solo travel feels so terrifying, especially for women, is that we are conditioned from children to make sure we stay safe, make sure we don't talk to strangers, make sure we don't take risks, make sure we don't go out alone, make sure we're not spontaneous, make sure we keep ourselves in our safe, protected bubble where everything is familiar, where we know everything, where we're not at risk and we're not at danger, and nothing bad could potentially happen to us. Solo travel challenges all of those things because you have to go out alone, you have to take the risk, you have to talk to strangers, you have to be spontaneous, and you have to put yourself out there. It just you have to. And that's the beauty of it because you understand that actually it's not as scary as you think. It's not as scary as you're conditioned to think it is. I think that part of this conditioning, yes, it's to keep us safe as young women, as girls. It's very important to keep our safety and make sure we aren't putting ourselves in situations that are dangerous. But I think a part of that is to keep us small. It's to keep the women small, to keep us in our box, to keep us behaved and protected and good girls. It's to keep us in our good girl conditioning always. That's what it always comes down to is keeping us in our good girl conditioning and keeping us in our box. And the other thing is that there's so much fear around solo traveling, and it isn't about the actual traveling aspect, it's about the fear of going alone, the fear of being seen without your protective bubble of who you think you are in the place that you live. It's about the fear of being left out, it's about the fear of embarrassing yourself, it's about the fear of uncertainty, the fear of the unknown. It's the fear of looking like you're in control. It's the fear of it's the fear of letting go of everything that you can control in your everyday life and understanding that to solo travel, you have to let everything go. It is the complete unknown. You have to step off the cliff, into the abyss, and just allow yourself to be guided to where you are supposed to go. And for someone like me, that is one of the most exhilarating and comforting feelings, which I know is not the norm. So travel is also potentially the fear of meeting yourself with no distraction. It the fact that are we scared to do it alone or are we scared to be alone with ourselves? Because have you ever actually been alone with yourself before? And that's something, especially for me right now in the Sunshine Coast. I know no one in the whole of Queensland. I have a few friends in Australia, but I am on my own. Like I know no one. My friend is gonna join me, but I have spent the first week alone. I have not spoken to anybody except from a few people on dog walks. I have had no real in-depth conversations with people unless I've been on FaceTime. And I was actually FaceTiming my friend earlier, and I said, I feel like I've actually lost like my vocabulary because I haven't spoken to anyone. And it's whether you could hold yourself in those moments. I know obviously a majority of people wouldn't be on their own for a whole week, but there will be times when you are on your own. You will have evenings where you might not want to stay in a hostel and you will be in a hotel, and it will be just you and your thoughts. And can you handle that? Can you push yourself out of your comfort zone to meet yourself where you're at? Because Sono Travel teaches you so much. It teaches you how to be resourceful. So it teaches you that you can actually do the thing, you can do hard things, you can resolve the problem. Everything is resolvable. That is one of my number one mottos when I travel. Everything is resolvable. You will figure everything out. Like you have figured every single bad case, worst case scenario out in your life so far. So, why, when you solo travel, do you think you wouldn't be able to come up with a solution for your problem? Every single thing is resolvable. And when you actually meet yourself in a situation, you resolve it, you overcome it, then you realize that, oh, I did that. And it wasn't even that hard. Then everything changes because you realize that you are unstoppable. And the only person that's been holding yourself back is you. Another thing is it teaches you self-trust, it teaches you to rely on yourself, to depend on yourself, to know that actually you are very fucking capable of making this happen. You are very capable of making this work, and you are very capable of allowing yourself to thrive, not just survive solo traveling. You also truly meet yourself. So, as I mentioned, there will be times when you are on your own, completely alone, you're gonna have nobody around with you, you potentially aren't gonna know anybody, and you truly meet yourself. You meet who you actually are because there is no distraction, there is no outside noise, there is no who you are supposed to be because that is who you were raised to be, and that is who you were growing up, so that is who you have to be. There's nothing, there's just you in this present moment, which is a really powerful thing because when was the last time you had no outside noise, no one telling you who to be, how you should behave, what you need to be doing with your life? When was the last time it was just you and you could truly meet yourself where you're at? The other thing is it makes you more magnetic because you are actually living in the present moment, you are present, and it opens up your curiosity, your excitement for life, your playful, inner child, feminine, joyful, creative side. Like I can walk to the supermarket here and I'm like filled with awe and wonder and curiosity and just like beauty because I'm like this is all new and amazing, and I just want to soak it all in and see it all, and then that makes you more magnetic because you're more aware of what's going on around you rather than if I went to the supermarket at home and it was just my normal supermarket. I went there every day, I knew what I wanted, I knew where it was. It was just autopilot. When you take yourself out of your normal situation and you're starting to travel somewhere new, you're out of autopilot. You challenge yourself, you have to be present, and that makes you more magnetic, that makes you more attractive in an energetic way. And I want to touch off loneliness because I feel like this is a big thing that puts people off because they don't feel like they are capable of holding themselves in a space of solo travel because of the fear of being lonely. And yes, you will be lonely at points. You will feel awkward, you will feel out of place, you will feel like you've put your foot in it, you will feel like you've said the wrong thing, and like you just wish that there was somebody there who you knew, who knew you, who could just help you figure something out because they already know how you would usually behave. There will be moments like that, but when you can have a moment like that and you overcome it yourself, you build self-trust. You build the belief in yourself that you can handle it, and you don't need anybody else to help you make a decision. That's one of the biggest things that I have learned from solo traveling is that you don't need anybody else to help you make a decision. You can do it all yourself. You're putting too much on other people, you rely too much on other people to help you make decisions, whereas solo travel forces you to make the decision alone. You don't know what you want to eat, you have to decide. Because you're the only person who is taking yourself out for dinner. You don't know what you want to do with your day. Well, you're gonna have to decide because there's no one else to input what they want to do. Like you're going to have to meet yourself and learn yourself and learn how to keep yourself occupied because loneliness and solitude are two very different things. You can be on your own and feel lonely, or you can be on your own and be content. And it's all about how you view yourself, how you meet yourself in these moments, and if you know how to actually fulfill yourself with your time. For example, I was in the UK, I was surrounded by my friends and family, and I felt more alone than I have in years. And I'm here in Australia, where I know like three people in the whole country, and because I'm more preoccupied in ways that I enjoy, I don't feel lonely because it's just solitude. This part of my life is solitude and it's not loneliness because I have more things to fulfill me because I am doing things like walking out in nature, I am going to the beach, I am working on my podcast and cyclica and reading books and spending time with the dog that I'm looking after. Like I'm doing things that fulfill me and make my soul happy. Whereas in the UK, I was kind of like back in the grind of working, I was living at home. Like it wasn't very fulfilling for me. And that's the thing, you can take yourself out of a situation, but if you don't know how to fulfill yourself, when you get to the new situation, you're just gonna feel exactly the same. So do not be afraid of being lonely when you so no travel. Because it's inevitable. Yes, you will feel lonely, but the more you meet yourself in that loneliness and the more you fulfill yourself, and the more you fill your time with things that actually mean something to you, the better you will become at going alone, and the better you become at being lonely, because it will just turn into solitude. And then trust me, in the long run, you will value it. Okay, so if you're wanting to solo travel and you are afraid, I see you, I feel you, I was there, I was you, but trust me, you can do it. So I'm gonna give you some tips for solo travel. And yes, I think I'm very qualified to give these tips because this is now my third, my third trip alone. I have spent almost a year completely alone in other parts of the world. Now I'm here in the Sunshine Coast in Australia. So if you are wanting to solo travel but you are scared, start small. These are six tips that I think will really help kind of shift you from the fear mentality to knowing that you are very capable and that you can do it. So, number one is start small. Take yourself on smoke solo dates on solo days. Like, can you go out for the day? Have you ever actually done anything alone? Because this is massive. Have you ever actually taken yourself out for dinner alone? Have you ever gone for a coffee and sat in a coffee shop alone? Have you ever gone to the beach for the whole day alone? Something that we just don't do in the West because we have everybody around us and we always have somebody to go with. So can you take yourself on a solo coffee date? Take yourself out for dinner, take yourself to the beach, take yourself wherever you want to go, go to London for the day and wander around. Like, do whatever it is that you want to do, something that interests you, but do it alone. Instead of finding somebody to join you, just go on your own and prove to yourself that you can actually do it. Like I remember I really wanted to go for pizza and when I was back in the UK, and I had nobody to go with. And I was like, Do you know what? Fuck it, I'm going alone. And one of my friends was like, Well, you went for pizza on your own. I was like, Yeah. Do you have any idea how many meals I've eaten alone? Like, it's not a weird thing. Like, I think when you solo travel and you get to these new places, it isn't a weird thing to then be on your own because so many other people are doing it. So don't overthink it, but just take yourself on solo dates or solo days. Number two is pick somewhere you actually want to travel to. Don't just go somewhere because Google tells you that X, Y, and Z Place is the best place for solo travelers. Where do you want to go? What do you want to see? Like, what fills you with joy and excitement? Like, what do you actually want to do with yourself and your time? So do that. Do you want to go lie on a beach? Go somewhere beautiful in the world where you can lie on a beach for a week. Do you want to explore a cultural city? Go somewhere where you can do that. Go somewhere where you know that when you get there, you have things to do that are going to fulfill you and are going to be able to fill your time and not allow you to feel bored and lonely and sad and like you've made the wrong decision. Number three is stay somewhere social. This can help massively, especially when you're new to pseudo traveling and you don't really know how to do it, how to meet people, you're a bit shy, you don't really know how to put yourself out there. Like start small, start easy, stay in hostels. If it's like your very first experience photo traveling, hostels are incredible because you just instantly meet people, you're in a room with them, you're gonna vibe, you're gonna meet, like, you're gonna mingle. However, I must say I have I probably only spent I probably spent less than a month, probably less than two weeks in a hostel in my whole entire time of travelling overall for the last like over in yeah. I cannot do hostels. I don't like it. I need to have my own space, but I am very good at putting myself out there and joining clubs or going to classes or sparking conversations with people in coffee shops. Like I'm very good at now meeting people in other ways. I don't have to rely on a hostel. I can know that putting myself in the right place and the right time, I will meet who I'm supposed to meet. Another great thing is if you are working, you could do co-living. So there is some places where you can have either like hostel dorms or private rooms, but you all kind of work in the same communal space. Another great thing is a wellness retreat. When I solo traveled, when my friend left me, the one of the first time I was ever alone on the other side of the world when my friend left me after we'd done three weeks together in Thailand, is I went to Vikasa, which is a yoga retreat in Koh Sunui in Thailand. And I went there because you have meals included, the yoga's included. It's expensive, but that meant I had a grounded first kind of way to enter into this solo life. So find something that resonates with you. Do you want to learn something new or go and experience something? Can you book a solo trip, but in a way that you're going to be around other people who are like-minded, so that you kind of ease yourself in and it doesn't feel so overwhelming. Another great thing to do is if you want to go solo but you are afraid to go solo solo, is book a group tour. So it's a great way to see a new place, to meet like-minded people, but to know that all of the kind of nitty-gritty detail and planning is all done for you and it's all kind of in one packaged price. Another great thing to do is have grounding routines. Is there things that you do in your daily life that you want to make sure you implement so that you can have some kind of structure when you go to this new country? For example, do you like to go on a morning walk? Do you like to go for a run? Do you like to meditate? Do you like to journal? Do you like to go to the gym? Or have all these kind of routines where when you travel around, you can keep those as your anchors. Like for me personally, meditation, journaling, the gym, they're like my three main things. So I will always have a meditation practice wherever I go in the world. I will always journal wherever I go in the world. It is something that keeps me grounded and allows me to just word dump word vomit into my notebook. And I will always say it's the gym. Wherever I am in the world, I will always find a gym and or some kind of like class, yoga classes, Pilates classes, a gym. I will always find some form of exercise class to join to be able to keep going back and keep myself grounded. Obviously, if you're going for like a long weekend city break, you might not need so many kind of grounding rituals. But if you are planning a three-month solo backpacking trip in Southeast Asia, then definitely those kind of things will be necessary. Also, if you are planning a solo trip to Southeast Asia, make sure you look at my travel blog. It from when I traveled a few years ago. It's Travels by Izzy. You can find it on Google. There's so many guides on there about where to go, things to do, places to visit, places to eat, beaches to go to. Another big thing is can you learn basic safety? Can you not overshare? Don't tell people that you're on your own. Say that you're with your friend, say you're with your partner, say they've just gone to the gym and you've gone here. Like you can lie. This is the this is something that I think as women we kind of forget. But you don't owe anybody your honesty in situations like this. You can pretend that you have a partner, you can pretend that you're married, you can pretend you have kids, you can say whatever you want to put your safety first. You don't owe anybody your honest situation. Another great thing is share your location with your friends or family, whether they are on the other side of the world or not, just let them know your location, let them know what you're doing, what your plans are, where you're going, if you're getting like a bus or a train or your moving locations, make sure that they have all that information. Trust your instincts. This is a massive one. If your intuition, if your instincts tells you something is off, something is most likely off. So trust it and get out of that situation. Trust the red flags when you see them. If you notice something is not right, it's probably not right. Always stay aware. I know this is easier said than done, but just be aware of your surroundings. Don't walk somewhere late at night on your own in the dark when you don't know where you're going. It's just basic like common sense. Make sure you put yourself first and make sure you stay aware of your surroundings and where you are and what you're doing at all times. Another thing is just be confident because if you are walking confidently, speaking confidently, acting confidently, there is less of a chance that people are gonna fuck with you because they think you know what you're doing. If you're standing there and you look lost and you look helpless and you look like scared and just terrified, you're probably more likely going to be in a vulnerable position. It's like any new country. When you arrive somewhere for the first time, you're more likely going to get scammed because you don't know how the rules work. Whereas when you are a repeating offender of a country and you know where you're going, you know what you're doing, you know how everything works, you're less likely to get scammed. So can you embody that confidence? And even if you don't know where you are, even if you're fucking terrified, can you just put on a face and just pretend that you're okay and then go to the bathroom, figure it out, sort your shit out? Just try and make yourself feel empowered as possible because then that will also help you make more aligned and conscious decisions if something goes wrong. And finally, stop waiting for the perfect moment. Stop waiting to have enough money, to have the right person to go with, to have the right place to visit, to have X, Y, and Z figured out before you can book the trip and go. Just go. Because sometimes your future self is waiting on the other side of a really hard decision and a really brave choice to make. So can you be brave? Can you put yourself out there? Can you stop waiting for the perfect moment and just go? Make it happen. Because if I can do it, then you can do it. And every woman should do it at least once in their life. Every woman needs to understand that you can get the plane on your own, you can navigate the new country on your own, you can check into a hotel on your own, you can book the trip, book the excursion, do all the things alone. You are very fucking capable. And once you understand that, you become unstoppable because you understand that you're not fragile. You're not gonna break the first fuck up or the first thing that goes wrong. You're just gonna figure it out and you're gonna move on and you're gonna be stronger for it. So understand that you are capable of creating that joy, that freedom, that expansion, that exploration and adventure all by yourself. You don't need somebody to go with you. You don't need permission to do it. You can do it on your own. Because maybe solo travel wasn't about meeting the person you are when you get to this destination. Maybe it was just about figuring out who you were before fear told you who you should be. Thank you so much for listening to the Good Girl Rebellion podcast. I hope this episode has given you the fire and the confidence and the boost you need to book that solo trip. Understand that you are fucking capable of doing it alone. And I believe in you. And if you have any questions, you can pop them in the comments and I would be more than happy to help. But if this episode resonated with you, make sure you follow along wherever you're listening or subscribe if you're watching along on YouTube. I am so grateful that you are here yet again. And if you know any guys or girls in your life who also need to find their confidence and their oomph and their power to book that solo trip, then make sure to send this to them so we can share the love and everybody can go on their own solo trip and just meet the unstoppable version of themselves that they actually are. If you haven't already, make sure to come and connect with me on Instagram at the Good Girl Rebellion Podcast for everything questioning the norm and breaking our good girl conditioning. May you find your fire and book that trip. Thank you again for listening, and I will see you again next week. All my love.