Who Is in Charge of Your Life: Empowerment and Chronic Illness with Catherine Chadwick

In this episode of Beyond My Diagnosis, I sit down with Catherine Chadwick, registered nurse, transformational life coach, and creator of The Art of Self Craftsmanship, for a deeply thoughtful conversation about responsibility, language, emotional intelligence, and what it truly means to live well with a chronic condition.

Catherine and I explore the idea that doctors treat medicine, but you are responsible for your life. We talk about how language shapes identity, why emotional awareness matters, and how curiosity can replace judgment when navigating health challenges.

This episode is an invitation to become a collaborative partner in your care, rather than handing your power away.

In this episode, you will learn:
• Why your life is your responsibility, even when managing illness
• How language impacts self-confidence and healing
• The difference between problems and challenges
• Why emotional intelligence matters in healthcare and leadership
• How curiosity helps interrupt negative thought loops
• What presence really means in daily life
• Why neuroplasticity gives hope at any age
• How to reframe limitations without denying reality

About Catherine:
Catherine Chadwick, BSN, RN, CLNC, NYCAPP, CLMC is a registered nurse, life mastery consultant, and applied positive psychology practitioner. She teaches people how to become more self-aware, emotionally intelligent, and empowered through predictable, repeatable systems for success and well-being.

Learn more about Catherine’s work here:
https://theartofselfcraftsmanship.org/

Transcript

0:00

(Music) Hello, this is Michelle Weston with Beyond Diagnosis. It's great to be back with you again, and thanks for stopping by and listening. As always, I have some interesting guests. And if you've been listening to me for the past couple of years, you know that I choose more integrative people. That doesn't mean we don't speak to the doctor or social worker or somebody with an MD. It just means that I have a tendency to want to find the integrative people, like yoga teachers, like nutritionists, biofeedback, stress reduction, those kinds of things, because that's your job. That's our job. I'm also with a chronic condition, as you guys know. So for me, that journey is as an expert in the audience. So 25 years later, this is where I am with MS. And it's not as bad as it could be, but it's different than what I thought. But this is my life. And Catherine is an RN, as I said, life coach. And I've been attracted to Catherine for so long. We started, we met each other. She was actually doing, helping with wound care after surgery when I needed wound care at home. And we become friends. That was like, God, that was 20 years ago, right? That was impossible, doesn't it? No. Yeah, that was 2011. 2011. So it doesn't seem possible. But we both seem to come at the idea that this is your body. This is your journey. And we're not being flippant. We're not being caustic. We're not being uppity. But the doctor has his job to do, and that is medicine. And all that falls under the purview of medication and infusions and new findings and research and exacerbations and all that, they help you with that. But the rest of it, who's the responsibility is that, Catherine? Well, it's interesting that you asked me that, Michelle. And before we go any further, I want to say thanks so much for the time with you today. Love it. I love having you and talking with you and sharing you with people. Well, I like to do the same with you. So how fun is that? It is interesting because your new title is Beyond Diagnosis. And the new work that I'm working on is the title of it, is the working title of it at this point right now, is Who's in Charge of Your Life? You are. Right? And it is imperative, I believe, that people understand the basics of how they actually operate. And when they understand that, then they make much better decisions for themselves and they can be a collaborative partner with the doctor or the therapist or-- but if you're just handing everything over to that other professional, then what's your responsibility? Right? And your life, my life, is your responsibility and my responsibility. And it's really important for people to understand that because I think many of us, particularly the generations that we are in, we have been programmed from a very young age that the doctor knows best. And the doctor knows best about medicine. But does the doctor know best about your body and your life? Right? No. And it's really incredible that we haven't been taught a bit differently because this information has been around for thousands of years. Right? And we definitely operate. We're three-dimensional beings. We're spiritual. We have this body and we have this mind. The body-mind-spirit concept is actually a real thing. Yeah. It is triptych. And remember, if it's a triptych, it cannot stand on its own on three legs unless it supports each leg. That's right. That's right. And when you think about it, you do not breathe yourself. You do not make your heart beat on your own, your electromagnetic. And we are energy beings. And I love that. Right? I do too. I do too. And I just love learning about it. And what I like to work with people on, I mean, there are a lot of dimensions that we work with people on. And though I believe that if people can understand the energy concept and learn to think of themselves on a more energetic level, then I believe it's much easier to understand situations and make decisions because until we can actually not eliminate our emotions, but if we cannot control our emotions, then that's a hindrance. Yes. Yeah. And that's why I think it's out of hand because the research actually shows that the lifespan of an emotion is only up to two minutes. Isn't that amazing? A lifespan of an emotion is only lasts up to two minutes. That's how long an emotion lasts. And it's our negative loop that we put it in and we play it and replay it and replay it and bring it on to somebody else. Right? Yeah. Oh my gosh. And that takes up a lot of time. And a lot of energy. Yes. Yes. So when you think that your thoughts, if you think of yourself as an energetic being and how the body operates and understand a little bit more about your nervous system and that every thought and every emotion and every action has an energetic value to it and every thought and every emotion and every action has a chemical cocktail response. Right? Yeah. And we are just not meant to live on stress hormones for any great length of time. We do have that negative default bias of the mind and the brain and the fight or flight is a reason. Right. Sure. And we are meant to live on that cortisol and all of those chemical cocktail reactions for any length of time because then the body at the cellular level starts to break down. Yeah. And I believe when people understand the basics of that, they're going to go, "Oh, now wait a minute. I can look at this a little bit differently." Exactly. Exactly. And that's what you want. You want to approach a chronic condition. And when you guys hear the word chronic, it just means multiple times, many times. Chronic is a Latin word. Chronic is many times. When you hear chronic conditions, that means many times. Sometimes we say chronic conditions, not a chronic condition, especially in America. We seem to like to have them in twos and threes as Americans. But understand, that's not a horrible thing. It just means that you're living with something that's a challenge. I don't say it's a problem. I try over the past 20 something years to say, "It's a challenge. MS isn't going to kill me. It's just really annoying. It's just really, really annoying. Today I'm doing an IVIG infusion for four hours. That's what I got to do." So I don't put any energy on it, or I put the least amount of energy on it as I can, even though in my understanding I have a nice conversations and we enjoy each other. But I don't live from it. If that makes sense. It's just something that I do and it will end and then I go right back into my life. Yeah. What's interesting, you were talking about multiple conditions. The research also shows that between 25 and 50 million Americans in America alone have an experience with some autoimmune condition. Wild, right? Yeah. Oh my gosh. And also when you think about 95% or so of the human health conditions and illnesses are lifestyle induced, let's take a look at that. And I was listening to Dr. Gabor Matei the other day on a podcast talking about the same thing and saying this is a cultural issue. Yeah. Especially the culture here in America. We are different. We're the babies. We are. The babies of countries in the world are 200 and something years old. We're not thousands of years into our history. We come from England and then we added in our melting pot. Lots of people from lots of different countries. And that's the beauty of living here. But we have a tendency to want to move fast, do fast, be fast. And we also like to create change and we also like to have money. So the entrepreneurial part of who we are as Americans is that, and that's not a bad thing, but what Catherine and I discuss a lot is how do you make that into a more balanced situation as opposed to money, money, money, money, money, money? How about sit back and think about a stool? It's a triptych. How do I get balance in my life spiritually, mentally, physically? How do I do that? And living with a chronic condition, well, it's another level of, well, this is a challenge. It's not that it can be done. I do it. Others do it. I'm not an expert on it at all, except I do it. And that's why I share the people I do share with you because we're trying to figure out how we as coaches, and that's Catherine and I with our coaching hats on, how can we ask you powerful questions that stimulate you to think about, oh, I do need more of that. I feel better when I take a walk when I'm really stressed, or I feel better when I get more sleep, or when I eat too much sugar or drink too much. The next day is kind of interesting. We're asking people to think about how they feel in their bodies as well. Right, Catherine? It's important to really evaluate honestly, right? Yes. Honestly is the hardest part. Where you're at, right? And what are the habits that you're working with that may not be serving you well, right? What habits can you develop more of? And when you think about, you were talking about the people coming from England and the melting pot and whatnot, when you think about nature and the Native Americans that were here, right? Are here still. Right. They're much smaller population. But I mean, in the beginning, right? And how they very much lived with nature. And we are a part of nature, all of us. Because we're all part of this universal energy information field, right? And quantum physics is a real thing too. And so it's important to understand all of these things. And I think that when you can recognize your present state and really evaluate that, and you can really understand what you're made of, right? Yeah. And then it also takes a step, I believe, of evaluating what your beliefs are. Yeah. And because that totally dictates how you make decisions, you know, what you think of. I believe that your actual nutritional diet is determined by your mind diet, right? And because what you choose to think influences your food choices. Yes. Right? Yeah. Agree. And so I think it's just all interconnected. And I think what I've had so much fun with, and I find extremely useful, and I work with clients I work with. In many writings and arenas, you are exposed to the witness, right? The witness that looks at you from the outside in it for a more objective view of what you're thinking, what you're doing and whatnot, right? And I have renamed the witness to my curious observer. Curious observer is much nicer than witness, my curious observer. Well, and curiosity, you know, I mean, it is just such a more open adventure, really. Yeah. And it has a little bit of mischief to it. It takes a lot of the judgment out of it. And that also takes some of the emotional sting out of it. And I think I have found it's a much quicker way to actually glean information as to, oh my gosh, what was I thinking that caused me to do that? Right? Or to say that or, you know, or evaluate my reaction to something, right? And I think that it's really, and that brings me to, you know, when we're doing that, it brings me back to being present. Yeah. Because I think that that is a huge benefit. Let's talk about that, you know, being present. What does that mean for you, for people who are hearing that? You know, people are going, well, I am present. I'm always present. We're talking about a deeper level of what presence and present means. Being awake, being aware, being conscious, being curious. Those are states of presence, you know? Having tenacity, that is a sense of presence. If somebody is tenacious, you can feel their energy, right? Somebody who's, you know, is tenacious, you feel some of that. And I want you guys to hear also, as Catherine and I were talking earlier, language is so important. I met a young physical therapist who's in a college, at Hunter College here, and she's one of the physical therapists who are helping the professor with a research study, a grant study on movement and whether we can use more weight on a leg press or a hamstring exercise with an MS patient with higher weight level. What happens to our energy levels? Okay, because you find a lot of times when you have a neurological condition, and it's not just neurological, but when you have a neurological condition, we experience something called neurofatigue. Everybody knows what fatigue feels like, but neuro is such a zapper, and a lot of us, I know with MS, don't know what that level will be at until we put our feet on the floor, everybody. You know, you can go to bed and, you know, be fine, or go to bed and not feel as good and then wake up the opposite, which I love. But she has a tendency, which is, it's cute because she's in her 20s and she's learning and she'll be a physical therapist and she'll be great. But she gets very, very rigid and she, last week, used the word "know" on me. Don't know me. Like, Catherine knows. Don't know me. Like, don't use that word. No. If you, so when you have somebody who's becoming a physical therapist, how would you feel if they were correcting you with a no? And I said to Catherine, you know, what you hear is the person that's receiving that gets more positional because it's like, what do we know? Like I'm just doing what you asked me to do. We have to think of another word. What would happen if she had said,"Michelle, I'd like you to consider trying it this way." Wow, that's received totally different than, "No, you're wrong. You're doing it wrong." No, I have a droplet and I'm doing it the way I do it. So since I've lived with MS, as long as you've been alive, don't know me. Like, she's 24 years old. It's like, don't know me. No, no, no is, you know, "know" is a great word to stop a child from moving."Know" is to make sure that you don't pour, you know, something bad into you."Know" has its place. I am not saying "know" is not in our vocabulary, but how we use it, especially when thinking about our bodies with an illness. I don't want to hear "know" because it limits me. I don't ever want to hear "know." Know you can't do that. Well, the minute you say, "No, I can't do that," is the minute that I say, "F off," and I'm going to go ahead and do it anyway. And yeah. Yeah, and I, and Catherine's the same way in regards to our personalities. We persevere. We like to get to the end, not quicker, but we like to get to the end with an action that is a much more positive one, right? Well, perspective is really interesting, isn't it? Yeah. And when we think that each one of us lives in a 360, right? Yeah. We have 360 possibilities of any way of looking at something. And what's interesting is, you know, we get habituated and we get used to looking or saying something the same way all the time. Yeah. And until somebody says to me, "Don't use that word, know, with me like that," right? Then it's not going to cause me to go, "Oh, okay. What's another way that I can look at this? What's another way that I can express myself?" And, you know, and that comes to the emotional intelligence piece, right? Yeah. And that, talk about a skill to develop, right? Right. Emotional intelligence today is so important for work, for leadership, for our lives. Talk a little bit more about emotional intelligence and what you say to people when you talk in that language. What does that mean, that phrase mean to you? Emotional intelligence. Well, what struck me was when you were talking about the physical therapist, and then another way to say it, you know, would you consider doing it this way? I would like to consider doing it this way. Or you can say, "Oh my gosh, I just had an idea. What about looking at it this way?" Or my experience is that I've had a much greater level of success, you know, doing it this way. And that doesn't mean that it's the right way, right? It's a way. A way, right? A way. Right. And then, but that's what allows more ideas to come in, right? Absolutely. We're meant to be expansive. We're not meant to be constricted and cranky. Totally. Totally agree. And that does. It just limits ourselves when we are constricted, when we limit ourselves. Are we as aware as we could be? Notice I didn't use the word would be as we could be. I would, I always say, "God, I sound like a broken record." I always am disappointed when somebody comes to me and says, even as a fashion director and women with clothes at a fashion show, and they would say, "I can't wear that." And I always say to them, "Can't or won't? Because it sounds like a won't. And I can't help you." Because you've just closed the door. Because you won't. You won't do it. So if you're not going to do it, you've just decided never, ever, never. And what's interesting is we get along in our years, you know, that old saying of never say never. Yeah. Oh gosh, isn't that funny? It is. Never say never. Right? And you have to, what we're trying to say is listen to how Kath and I are using words because if we could hear ourselves, I know there's moments where I would step back and approach something differently. And as long as you're willing to explore these ideas, especially living with a chronic illness, the opportunity is to have a better quality of life. Right? And I believe that going back to what you were talking about, you don't see it as a problem, seeing it as a challenge, right? Yeah. Just the difference in those two words changes your perspective immediately. Yeah. And we all have hurdles. Yeah. In different ways, different times, different things. Right. And it's so important to go, oh, another challenge is another opportunity actually. Which I love that you've always said that to me. And guys, you know, there's been moments, they're very dark for all. Everyone has them. Everyone has dark moments, especially with a chronic illness, with cancer, with MS, with rheumatoid arthritis, with diabetes and so forth. But when Catherine over the years, even as a friend, has said to me what you just heard, I choose to step back. And sometimes I have to say, I can't hear you right now. We have to discuss this later. I don't do this as much as I used to. Right? And she doesn't get as much pushback from me as she used to. But the point is, is that we're just humans being human. Okay? Right? We're humans trying to just be human. So if your life was going on a certain way, like this 27-year-old I mentioned, and suddenly somebody goes, oh no, it's not going to look like this at all, that would upset me a great deal. And I'd have to reframe my life. I've had to reframe my life. Do I always like the speed or the choice that I've made? Would I do it differently if I had thought about it a different way? Sure. But I can only live in the moment. I can't live backwards. I have a mess, but I'm not a mess. And that was when I was diagnosed in 2000. That's what I got. But I don't have to choose to live in the past. And I am not saying that's easy, right Catherine? Because it's almost like a gerbil on a wheel. We get caught in a moment. Well, it's going back to that getting stuck on an emotion or a thought, right? And just playing that over and over and over. And then that influences everything. And it's just like, whoa, whoa, whoa, now wait a minute. Let's have a little pattern interrupt here. And today, since we know and we both love the whole idea of neuroplasticity, right? Whether you're 8, 18 or 80, guess what guys? We have the coolest thing we found out with research and science. You can reframe and shift your brain. I know that sounds like crazy town, but you have the ability, the opportunity, and the what else? The chance to take a different path. And that's worth a lot to be able to say, OK, I've been doing it this way and reacting this way for so long. I can't not react this way. I'm just going to always react to this situation when it comes up. With neuroplasticity and working with neuroplasticity, yes, therapists work with it, psychiatrists, psychologists, but coaches also work with neuroplasticity because we can ask you more powerful, more insightful questions. And no, none of us have the answer. Only you have the answer. Coach with your coachee, with their client always has to remember this journey with our clients is about asking and motivating them to think differently. Can I tell you what that difference is? No. What have you experienced with your clients? Have you had those moments that, you know, one that sticks out to you when somebody just like had an aha moment? Oh, absolutely. There are a lot of them, which is so fun, you know, because I can inspire you. I can give you information. I can give you some guidance. I can give you some suggestions. I can ask you those questions. And you're the one that has to empower yourself. You have to learn to work from the inside out, right? And developing your intuition and trusting yourself, I believe, is part of the process to embrace your own self-empowerment, right? Yeah. And I think that's really incredible power to recognize. I think so. It's imperative, I believe, because it's all part of living a healthier life. Yeah. And success is your own standard, right? Yeah. It's your own interpretation. It's what standard you raise yourself to, right? Yeah. Yep. And whether you want to raise the bar for yourself or you want to continue on the lower energetic levels, you know. And for some things you may continue on the lower energetic levels. Everything doesn't have to be 110%. Like Catherine and I will both say that, too. But it's the opportunity and the idea that we can shift. Yes, we can, right? You don't have to go to the grocery store the same route every day. Nope. Nope. You got it. You don't have to go to the same grocery store. You can actually go, you know what? I really want, and I want dragon fruit and really interesting fruits and vegetables. Mostly, mostly fruits. If I want passion fruit, if I want dragon fruit, if I want star fruit, I'm going to go to one place over another because I know that they buy a lot of exotic fruits that I would love to have. And, you know, that's when I crave. But if I want pasta and great cheese and great, you know, or just olives and things like that, I go to another store, you know, it's throwing me in an Italian place and I'm going to go to get that. And I wonder what that new French place has, right? Yeah. They just open. I mean, what would they have different that I wouldn't know? And you know, going into a place that has more Caribbean, more island type things, you're going to learn a whole new thing. You know, if you go to a Japanese Asian, I have, we have an Asian market away from me about 12 blocks. And that's an incredible experience. Now, I always get stumped because a lot of the things that are packaged like noodles and, you know, soy sauce and syrups and stuff like that, they're in Chinese or Japanese. And I always have to sometimes find someone to tell me what it is. What is this? And then I always ask, how would you serve it? How would you make it? You know, because you do want to get hot. You want to make it cold. What do I do with it? Because that opens up a whole new world of opportunity for me to try something new. Well, and when you were talking about that, it's just another, another thing to consider, another thing to think about. How many languages are there in the world? Yeah. Right? Yeah. I mean, it's, we have that opportunity to do that. So I hope, you know, today at Beyond, on Beyond Diagnosis, you've learned some new ways to do things. We'll have Catherine back to talk about something we've talked about before on the podcast when it used to be Learning Curves 2.0. And that is the sunshine quotient, because I love when she talks about our need for sun, our need for that. Catherine, if anybody wants to reach out to you as a life coach and a health coach, how would they do that? Where would they do a website that they can reach out to a podcast somewhere or an Instagram account that we should share with them? I am on social media platforms. I am on LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, and also I am on TikTok. Okay. And I have a website of the art of self craftsmanship.org. Love it. Which also includes sunshine quotient.org. Perfect. So the art of self craftsmanship.org is where you can find out more about what Catherine's talking about. Because again, it takes a village. It's not done by one, it's done by many. And I like being a part of a village and putting in my true sense. But I sure as heck like to listen to somebody else's. Right? Absolutely. Well, it's part of being a lifelong learner, I think. Yeah. So have a great week, everyone. You can reach me through michellewestoncoach.com. And you can find that at micheleston.com. And I'm relaunching my website now. And you have a podcast. And I'm on Instagram under Michelle advocates fourth and number four health on Instagram that I love. So have a great day. And hopefully we've given you some food for thought that makes you think. Right? I mean, we'll see Catherine on the other side and have another conversation about ways to shift and ways to enjoy our lives. But I think Michelle, this has been great. Me too. Thank you for stopping by. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Beyond the Diagnosis is something we talked about today resonated with you. If you're craving deeper understanding, better support, or just want to know you're not alone on this journey, make sure to subscribe to my free sub stack at michelleweston.substack.com. That's where I share personal insights, expert takeaways, and extra resources to help you stay informed, empowered, and one step closer to the clarity you deserve. And if you found this episode helpful, leave a review or share it with someone who needs to hear it. Your voice helps this message go further. Until next time, keep asking questions, keep trusting yourself and keep going beyond the diagnosis.