Episode 28 How The Right Vendor Team Makes Or Breaks Your Wedding: Aalea from The Booking House

What if your wedding day felt calm, focused, and fun from first look to last dance? We sat down with Aalea, the no-nonsense wedding coordinator at The Booking House, to reveal how great timelines, strong vendor teams, and clear priorities turn chaos into flow. From the rugby field to the reception floor, she brings a play-caller’s mindset to planning and execution: anticipate, adapt, and protect the couple’s experience at all costs.

We dig into the decisions that matter long before the aisle—how to define your top priorities together, why the right vendor lineup can save the entire event, and the questions that separate a true coordinator from a building site manager. Aalea shares how she builds timelines that actually work, keeps vendors aligned without drowning couples in emails, and safeguards the day from last-minute detours that steal time from dancing, dinner, and real connection. If you’re juggling budget constraints, she offers practical levers to pull: cut guest count before quality, focus decor where it counts, and repurpose florals between ceremony and reception.

You’ll also hear hard-won lessons on accountability and teamwork: what great vendors always do, how to avoid trends that look cute online but waste precious minutes, and why communication should flow through one channel as the day approaches. For new vendors, Aalea lays out a path to credibility—over-prepare, learn names, take notes after every event, and own your misses. For couples, she keeps it human: limit outside opinions, share a simple list of priorities with your coordinator, and build white space so the best moments can breathe.

If you want a wedding day that feels like you—and runs like clockwork—this conversation is your blueprint. Subscribe, share with a friend who’s planning, and leave a review to help more couples find their calm amid the confetti.

https://www.thebookinghousemanheim.com/

https://www.thebookinghousemanheim.com/in-house-services

https://www.instagram.com/thebookinghouse/

Transcript

Meet Aaliyah And The Booking House

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Preferred List, a podcast about the people behind the best wedding days. I'm James, a wedding filmmaker. I've spent years in the industry working alongside incredible vendors, and this show is all about real conversations with the ones who make it happen. Whether you're a vendor or a couple, you'll get honest insight, good stories, and maybe a little inspiration along the way. Let's meet today's wedding vendor. Hey Aaliyah, how's it going?

SPEAKER_00 0:24

It's going well. That's how you say it.

SPEAKER_01 0:27

That is exactly how you say it. Guys, we are it is currently 3.08 p.m. We're rallying for this episode, and I'm very excited. Aaliyah works here as a wedding coordinator at the booking house. Um, and I'm just grateful for Brittany and y'all for like hosting this film day. It's so fun. Um, the booking house is an industrial modern chic wedding and events space in Manheim PA, rich with character and history. It was originally built in 1884 as the old General Cigar Company warehouse, and the venue blends historic charm with contemporary style across 15,000 square feet. It's centrally located in its easy it's an easy drive from Philadelphia, Westchester, New Jersey, Maryland, and even New York City in under three hours, and it serves both local couples and destination couples. It's a perfect event space for intimate gatherings or even up to 250 guests. And the booking house offers separate spaces for ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception all on one property. It's open year-round, and the newly added atrium brings an open air feel without any worry about the weather. With an experienced caring team providing in-house bartending and coordinating, they are dedicated to making every detail seamless so you can enjoy an unforgettable day. And I will say, every time I'm here, you are the center of what I feel like is the seamless, enjoyable day. Just like keeping everything behind the scenes running smoothly. Um, so I'm so excited to like pick your brain on like how you do that.

SPEAKER_00 2:01

There's a lot to pick.

SPEAKER_01 2:04

There's a lot to pick. Um Aliyah, thank you so much for being on, being a part of this film day here at the booking house at the venue that you work at. Um tell me a little bit about how you got your start in wedding

From Rugby Field To Aisle Management

SPEAKER_01 2:18

coordinating.

SPEAKER_00 2:19

Yeah. So I went to school at Westchester University. Uh, I played rugby there. It was super fun.

SPEAKER_01 2:25

No way, my wife played rugby.

SPEAKER_00 2:27

Where? At Penn State. What years?

SPEAKER_01 2:30

Uh she's gonna kill me. Uh 2012 to 20 uh whatever that is. 15, 16?

SPEAKER_00 2:40

Because I was in 2014 to 2018. Did you guys play each other? We probably did. Yeah. That's no, no offense. Like there's it's there's bad blood between Westchester and Penn State. It might be one-sided, like where we just Penn State's really good. Yeah. And Westchester's really good too, but Penn State, like, we're varsity in their like club, so they could get around some stuff. She's gonna be like, no, but like it's a Oh my gosh, I can't wait to tell her. That's so funny. I feel like we I know a lot of people that she probably played with too. So that's do you know what position she played? Oh, tell me a lot about her. Flanker? Flanker?

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Maybe really she's gonna kill me if that's wrong.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

I maybe do you know what the number on her jersey was?

SPEAKER_01 3:18

I don't. I can ask her.

SPEAKER_00 3:19

That's all right. Fly half?

SPEAKER_01 3:22

I don't even know what that means.

SPEAKER_00 3:23

Okay, you would know. That's what I played. Basically the quarterback. Hence why I'm at where I'm at. Yeah, it makes sense. It makes sense. Yeah, well, so that kind of like I always tell people like that ties into like weddings in a weird way of like rugby was so like mentally and physically like taxing, and like you just have to be on, and there's like no stop. Like, because for in my position, it was always like I have to think 20 steps ahead and pivot. And also while getting run over, running over, sprint, like yeah, it's so much. So I don't I think if I didn't have that background, I don't know if I would have what it takes to be a wedding coordinator because it it takes a lot, it really does.

SPEAKER_01 4:02

It's you have to have some pretty tough skin.

SPEAKER_00 4:04

Uh yeah, yeah. Yeah, you really and you have to pivot, but anyways, so yeah, so that's what I did. And then I know I didn't know of what I wanted to do, and then um I graduated with business management to keep it kind of general. I got an internship at Enterprise. You can put that in. Please put that in. Yeah. Um, did meet my baby daddy there. He's my fiance. I'm not wearing the ring, but it's so bad. It is so bad. You can put all of this is all of it.

SPEAKER_01 4:32

Yeah, it's all good. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:33

Um, but yeah, so I was there and then I was worked at like a wholesaler doing like account stuff, and then I was a claims adjuster for an insurance company. That was awful. It was horrendous. And I am a very like people person, I think. Like, so I was like, I need to get out of this. And then um the booking house had like an ad for event coordinator, and I interviewed like they with very like minimal background. I did like rugby stuff and maybe some things for like the school, but like nothing events, and like it was like, you need like three years events. And I was like, I don't feel like oh luckily, like Brit is so cool. Um I don't know if you'll play her episode before me, you can, I guess, but she took a chance on me, and then I started here, so that was back in like 2021, I think. So I've been doing it for like over four years now. So that's why I got here, and I took because Brit was in my position first, so I took her position and she was then in where she's at now, and it was like a I was right in, like threw me to the wolves. Oh god. Oh yeah. The first few weddings I did, shout out to those couples for bearing with America's. Literally, I one one time a mom came up to me and was like, Hey, um, is there gonna be enough room for all the chargers on the tables? And I was like, I mean, maybe on the tables, but like we don't have enough outlets. And she's like, No, like the chargers, and I was like, Yeah. Do you know what a charger is?

SPEAKER_01 6:06

Yeah, we'll just pour one out for that moment for you.

SPEAKER_00 6:09

I was hungry.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

I will say, I like the word charger makes no sense for the plate thing.

SPEAKER_00 6:15

Thank you. But yeah, that as your wedding coordinator.

SPEAKER_01 6:18

So obviously the first couple were a thing. They happened. But what was it like those first couple must have been enjoyable in some ways for you to be like, actually, you know, I could see myself doing this and being here like four or five years later.

SPEAKER_00 6:36

They were great. They were like, I remember like the first one I did, I was kind of shadowing Brit. And I was like, oh my gosh. Cause I was, I honestly had never even been a guest much at a wedding. Like, I really, really did not know anything.

SPEAKER_01 6:49

You're really stuck under the radar on that.

SPEAKER_00 6:51

Oh, yeah. Like I was I was in maybe the first time. You're highly qualified now. No, now. But I I also think it's the best way to go into it because I came in really eager, like, and also coming from like a not burnt out type side of it, like I was just like trying to figure out how to make things better and all that. Like, I think if I had would have had like multiple events experience with like doing stuff in high school and like college, I feel like events are a lot. So I think I could have been like seeing it very like, um, what's the word?

SPEAKER_01 7:25

Like I've almost been like scarred by like the yeah, it used previously.

SPEAKER_00 7:29

Like clinically instead of like when I came in, I saw it very like weddings, the couples so like it was just like so magical, so great. Can't believe I get to do this. And like really like I was humbled, but I learned so much, and I also still had the end of like always respecting that it's someone's wedding day. Yeah, which is something I think in this industry people like vendors will lose.

SPEAKER_01 7:50

Oh yeah, yeah. And we were just talking about that. Um, I mean,

Early Lessons And Tough Skin

SPEAKER_01 7:55

in the in this film day, the one before yours, it's just like so easy to not have the right mindset in that. Um when you're in that process early days, how much how much different is it now than it was then for you?

SPEAKER_00 8:13

Oh my gosh, it is so different. It is like insanely different. I feel like I know too much now that like it has made it more complicated in meetings where I'm like, well, if you do this, you're gonna get this.

SPEAKER_01 8:26

Too much running through your mind.

SPEAKER_00 8:28

And I have to like be like, all right, chill. So in the beginning days, I think I just kind of really like, I did not, but yeah, pros and cons. Like, I was like, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And then got burned and burned and burned. And I was like, all right, constantly thinking of like how can we make things better? And I know there's like a big thing with like venues with like do's and don'ts, and like couples will like rant and rave and like TikTok, they'll be like, you can't do anything. Like for us, I know at the booking house, like we have curated the yes and no's strictly in the like with the thought of like like the best event day. No one wants to tell you no. Like, I would love to just be like, we can do everything and anything, but that's not realistic, it's not gonna happen. And there's a there's so many reasons behind all this stuff. So that's like in the beginning, I was just like, uh, whatever, do it all. I didn't think other things suffered on the wedding days because I didn't know that, but now I know a little bit too much, and I think I become very like regulated and almost overwhelming the couples in a sense. Maybe I'm also very hard on myself. So maybe I'm just like saying that.

SPEAKER_01 9:32

But I mean, in the end, they probably appreciate all of the extra. I think maybe in the moment it can be a little overwhelming, but it's gonna be overwhelming any part of the process.

SPEAKER_00 9:40

Yeah, it's also are they gonna do they listen to you?

SPEAKER_01 9:44

Yeah, no, no, 50-50. 50-50. They ain't listen to it. It's a coin flip. Yep. Um, what's one of the biggest things that you've learned though in the process throughout the years that you've been working here that like this this makes a wedding day run smoothly every time?

SPEAKER_00 10:04

Um, have you asked other vendors this?

SPEAKER_01 10:06

No.

SPEAKER_00 10:07

Okay, because I the number one answer is who you hire, who your vendor team is.

SPEAKER_01 10:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 10:12

100%. You can have $10 million

Why Vendor Choice Determines Success

SPEAKER_00 10:16

and buy everything, but if you buy, like if you get just bad vendors And in the wedding and share everyone's like, let's be nice, everyone. And like I am nice, like I will be nice, but like I think that I personally am so protective of my couple's investments, and like I know how much it is, and I really love my couple, and I will run myself into the ground to before an event fails, no matter who it is. So it's like that's the standard that I expect. And like if you don't get that all around with your vendors, like it it hurts your event. And I've seen it happen time and time again. It's like they'll have all these other great vendors, and like those few great vendors can't always pick up the pieces for even just one like really, really crappy vendor. You one, I think you do get what you pay for, and two, sometimes even then it's like I don't know, it's that's also hard to say because there's some like higher end people that are not that good either.

SPEAKER_01 11:15

Yeah, and I I think that's a thing that this is what we do talk about a lot is like how do you know beforehand whether or not they're going to be good. Um and even like reviews might say good things, but not might only be the good things of the maybe not so good things.

SPEAKER_00 11:34

The reviews I've seen can be curated and like made to seem a certain way. And I mean I think part like it's hard to talk about because if you have like a full service planner, I'm sure they will guide you the right way. Like you just have to listen. But then like for coordinator or like with us, we do have like a vendor list of like only like our catering is like required you have to choose from, but like we only put people on, we get no kickback from anything, like, and I think that's how it should be. I don't think any place should get a quick like that's just weird. Yeah, but we have taken people on and off of our list throughout the years just based off of like performance, and it's just like we do that as one, like we really like you, we want you back, but then also like just know like if you don't give that level of service or you don't handle it properly afterwards, then like you're off the list and you'll definitely not be like it's just how it goes. Yeah, it's yeah, because I get some people can have off days, but it's also how you handle it afterwards, you know.

SPEAKER_01 12:33

Is there something that the good ones just general vendor, not like a specific category, but the general vendor, what are the good ones always doing?

SPEAKER_00 12:44

They're personable and like I don't even know how to explain. They're personable, they talk to you like a person, like that's the same thing as personable. I guess from what I've seen, I think in general, a good vendor talks to the couple like it's their wedding day, is keeps that high energy excitement, is responsive as much as they can be, and is like clear with them if they are busy, like being like, Hey, I am like just being really like the communication and then the day of like going above and beyond and just the energy, I think.

SPEAKER_01 13:21

Yeah, yeah. Well, you have like a very specific piece of the puzzle where you're kind of you're almost like putting the puzzle together in some ways, and then like also keeping it together in other ways, and I feel like it's such an interesting perspective because like from my perspective as a wedding videographer, I'm like I might like partially see some stuff hitting the fan, but I it really doesn't affect me all that much, even if the timeline gets like skewed a little bit. I'm kind of like whatever.

SPEAKER_00 13:59

Must be nice, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:00

But for you, like you have this perspective where you are almost like overseeing

Teamwork, Accountability, And Energy

SPEAKER_01 14:08

the whole thing, keeping it running smoothly. So it seems like if vendors are showing up, they're willing to work together, they're enjoyable to work with. Your job's like smooth sailing, more so than like button heads all day.

SPEAKER_00 14:25

Well, you hit the nail with like the teamwork, that's huge. Like we're not coming in as separate entities, like when you're here that day of, it's like we're all one company, you know? Like that's just how it should be. Like, we're all here for the same purpose. So it's hard, yeah, when they don't have that teamwork mentality. It you could it you could tell, and then yeah, it just causes extra work. And I feel like my job too, being in that over like encompassing thing, like if something does go wrong, it's looked to me as to like, why did that go? Like, why didn't you do X, Y, and Z to prevent that? And it's just like it can be a lot. So that's why I am kind of the way I am. Yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

That's the way I put it. Well, I mean, you kind of have to be in in some ways.

SPEAKER_00 15:07

It it's such a delicate line of being like trying to be friendly and like friends and like the cool, like, but then it's like you need to be like, oh my, like, let's go, you know, it's so it is.

SPEAKER_01 15:19

But I think I struggle with that. I mean, you said it though, you're doing it to protect your couples.

SPEAKER_00 15:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:26

And I think if even if someone, you know, in the moment's like, oof, that was a rough moment we had together, right? If it was happening, but if I knew that you were coming from a perspective of like wanting to care the best for your couple that's there, and maybe that vendor didn't measure up, it's like, okay, I didn't do it. I appreciate you looking out for the couple. I'm here, we're good. Like, let's move forward from that moment. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:54

Accountability, yeah. Yeah, be yeah. This this industry has a tendency of people to try and Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:00

Oh, she did it. Yeah. I literally did that out by accident. I didn't see the photographer, and the planner was like, Oh, let's do a PJ fix. And I was like, I haven't seen the photographer. I was like, Rachel, I'm so sorry. I did not know you were here. I was outside. I didn't she had been there for like 40 minutes.

SPEAKER_00 16:17

And that and that's so like that's so good.

SPEAKER_01 16:18

I apologized to her like four times. I'm like, I'm so sorry. But she was friends with the planner, so it all worked out. I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_00 16:23

No, that's good. There's so many times where like just a little bit of account of accountability from someone would have like mended the weird situation that has that come like comes up because people are always like then you coordinators like yeah, they're just so annoying. And I'm like, I'm not annoying. I'm doing some of your job, not getting any of your money, but get it together, pick it up. I won't be annoying if you do your job.

SPEAKER_01 16:49

Yeah, we have this, yeah, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_00 16:51

You won't see much.

SPEAKER_01 16:52

Could you explain? We're talking about jobs. Could you explain like what's a venue coordinator, what's a wedding coordinator, what's a planner?

SPEAKER_00 17:01

Like, how do you I might have to get depostured for that one?

Demystifying Coordinator Vs Planner Roles

SPEAKER_00 17:05

You're open enough something. I don't know. You want to go down. I also did not bring water.

SPEAKER_01 17:10

Like, want to sit back a little bit? I would say she sat down and I was like, good grief, your posture.

SPEAKER_00 17:17

I was trying to be that cool girl, but this might be me now.

SPEAKER_01 17:20

So speaking of the the job thing, like you have a specific job on the day as the wedding coordinator, but there's this like weirdness of like that could mean like four different things to four different people, and then there's like planner, there's there's all these different things. Maybe demystifying like what does it mean for you when you say that you are a wedding coordinator?

SPEAKER_00 17:45

Yeah. Let me say this real quick to anyone listening the stigma about venue coordinators, wedding coordinators, wedding planners, everything is always different. And it's for the venue coordinator, wedding coordinator side of it, that is so specific to where you are booking. The booking house, we do things right, we do things proper. We are more than what some places will tell you a venue coordinator is. So specifically for us, I will tell you what we do. And I don't know if that matches what like other venues, venue coordinator or wedding coordinator does, because we also have like site managers here that are here for like the building that just like come with like the venue. They're doing temperatures, doing bathrooms, they're just checking out.

SPEAKER_01 18:38

I think the problem is your site manager that you have here could be considered some type of like venue coordinator at somewhere else.

SPEAKER_00 18:47

That's what I've heard, and that's what I've like gathered. So it is so frustrating when like people will box it into like it's this or this. It's so it's situational. And yeah, that sucks that you can't just say, oh, this is that, this is that. But that's the wedding industry. Like videography, are you documentary? Are you this? Are you 80s style on a VHS? Like everything is so different in itself. So for us, what we do is I don't like saying a day of coordinator, we're a wedding coordinator because I jump in. Honestly, whenever the person books here, they can, if they book the coordinating service, they have access to me. Like, I'm never gonna be like, you only get X amount of time. Like, I could never do that.

SPEAKER_01 19:30

Because we were talking and it was, it feels like most of the time it's like a three-ish months.

SPEAKER_00 19:35

Yeah. So I like fully jump in with them at the two-month outmark. So like I have like the details meeting where I get all the information to make their timeline, the decor and design sheet, um, talk through like layout and stuff like that. And then like we're really in touch from that two-month outmark up until their wedding day about like finalizing the details for that timeline, um, going back and forth on just like all the stuff that's needed. So um yeah, I do timeline creation, I get their vision so that I know how to set things up for them because I do all that setup and everything and tear down at their wedding, and then I run the timeline on the day of. I am in contact with their vendors. So I'm checking in to confirm stuff, get their arrival time, general questions, and then I give them all a copy of the timeline too. So keeping everyone on the same page and just reinstating that teamwork mentality. So I'm not just like a hey day of like I'm here. What's up? Like I'll fluff your dress, like, yeah, I'll fluff your dress, but I'm also doing 10,000 other things.

SPEAKER_01 20:37

Yeah, and I can attest to that because you did that at the wedding that we were here.

SPEAKER_00 20:40

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 20:40

Like doing all the things.

SPEAKER_00 20:42

I do a lot. Like, I I don't think there's anything I really don't do. Yeah. If it's gonna yeah.

SPEAKER_01 20:48

Yeah, I that that's what I think the problem is, is like there's a lot of site managers that are saying some form of coordination. And so if you're a couple that's listening, just clarify, like ask the question, like what does that mean? Because you'll get a lot of you'll get a lot of perspective.

SPEAKER_00 21:06

Yeah, check in. Are they there the whole day? Is it the person that you've been working with or is it a different person? Like how intimate, just yeah, get a gauge on how intimate it is with that wedding coordinator. And like it's so hard to say because of like the range of like what everyone does and don't doesn't do to think of like a good few questions to ask them because like it's so weird. Um all these other venues are like popping into my head as like far of like the different levels, but I would say, like, yeah, is the person I'm talking to gonna be like the my coordinator? Are they assigned? Do I meet with them beforehand? Do they create a timeline? Do they work with my vendors? And are they there from the start to the finish? Because I've heard all these stories of like, oh, the coordinator was there, and then like after dinner, they never saw them again. And like usually after dinner you you don't see them much because like things are just kind of flowing, but you should see them, especially at the end end, like Yeah. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 22:02

I feel like you have such strong opinions about

Building Timelines And Vendor Communication

SPEAKER_01 22:05

stuff. I do. I love it.

SPEAKER_00 22:06

I do.

SPEAKER_01 22:07

It's so good.

SPEAKER_00 22:08

And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:08

Because no one wants to take a stance in the wedding industry. I'll just like hot tip.

SPEAKER_00 22:11

Oh, some people take a stance. It's not the right stance. It's like a jaded stance that I disagree with, and I've been in talks with them about it. And it's fine. Like, but it's just frustrating when I'm in talks with some people about putting that out there to the world about what they think a venue coordinator is and isn't. I don't agree with what they say or how they say it because I work so hard. So I feel like it belittles me and like takes credit away from everything I've done. And I just know the literal blood, sweat, and tears I've put in. And I just know, like, if you're gonna talk about it like that, always be saying booking house excluded. Don't say select venues excluded. Booking house excluded. Aliy's amazing. Like, I put some respect. No, for real. It's just like I really, it's just it's it's infuriating. It really is.

SPEAKER_01 23:04

Yeah. Well, it's tough too, because like I think probably over the years it's meant different things to different people, and then it kind of probably just got pigeonholed into like what it is now.

SPEAKER_00 23:13

Well, like the bad people ruin it for the good people, so which is true across the board. For sure.

SPEAKER_01 23:19

Um what's your advice for couples that are kind of in that planning stages where they're like, hey, we wanna try to stick to some sort of budget? Um, maybe it's not the like big budget type uh, you know, that they're looking at. How do they still kind of have that personality shine through? Um, you know, are there things that they can do to kind of like work with that really well?

SPEAKER_00 23:47

Yeah, I think it's it's tough. It's once again all very situational. But in general, I would say like decor-wise and everything, less is more, especially in budget. Like you don't need to decorate every nook and cranny of your like when guests come in, they don't notice everything that you think you would notice. So I would say one, just like maybe reel it in there if you're struggling with a budget. Two, reel it in with like your guest count. Like, really think through are you gonna be friends with these people in 10 years? Like, is it just because your mom wants them? And like put your foot down if you're struggling with a like, especially if you're struggling with budget. Just yeah, that's huge. You'll cut out a lot. And then, like, there's just like some. If you do have a good coordinator or a good planner, they can also review stuff that you already have and already want and tell you how you can refine it. Like, there's been a lot of times where I will see like a floral contract, and this is stuff that like a planner technically does, but this is stuff your girl will do. And I'll see, oh, I can repurpose this for what you want for that. You take that out. Saved them like $100 to $600 because of the way with our building we can repurpose things in different rooms and everything. And um, yeah, I don't know. I maybe just like, yeah, asking advice from people that are in the industry, especially if you have a coordinator or a planner, like they'll definitely help you save money because I love all wedding vendors. I know everyone's trying to get paid, but there's things that like couples might just sign off on thinking that they need it, and you really don't need like I really don't want to call out certain things because I don't want to offend people.

SPEAKER_01 25:26

But but there's couples that would sign off on something thinking they need it, but they don't, and they would be more excited after the fact if they invested it in other ways. 100%. And it's not even like I don't know, it's not even like the difference between content creation and videography. Like it's not that one's bad and one's good, or one's good and one's bad. They just serve a different purpose. And if a couple is excited about one and not the other, or both, like they just need to go off of like later on down the road, 10 years, 15 years, 20 years, when you look back on the day, are you gonna be like thinking about that extra floral arrangement? Are you gonna be thinking about that uh like oh, I wish I would have spent extra money on more desserts because I love desserts.

SPEAKER_00 26:13

Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 26:13

Like you just gotta go with what you want in some ways.

SPEAKER_00 26:16

That's so true. Yeah, because it can get overwhelming, and then you see all this like social media is like you should have this, this, and this, and like it's just social media is like terrible, really, for that.

SPEAKER_01 26:27

Yeah, it's well, there's no there's no like price tag on the photo that you see. And usually it's the more expensive end of things.

SPEAKER_00 26:34

100% or like these grand ideas of like doing some no. So the trend I've been seeing that's really it's frustrating. So they they auction off who gets to go through the buffet line first. And I'm like, the logistics, the time killing that that does. Like, there's like it could be funny, and it could be like, oh, we can make some extra money. Like, look how much money they made. And it's just like one, not no, not ever every wedding is different with the vibe of like what they'll do and not do. And then, like, two, it's like you pay when you break it down to how long your event time frame is versus how much you paid for the venue, and you're like, that is how much we spent on that amount. It's just that's the thing that's in this knot it up, messed up, crazy, filled with wedding

Budget Smarts And Cutting The Noise

SPEAKER_00 27:20

knowledge, rugby knowledge, random, random true crime knowledge. Like, it's in there that I'm just like, I could tell you all of this. Just like, yeah, when you're when you're experienced vendors also are maybe advising you another route, also listen to that, maybe. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 27:36

Yeah. Well, I mean, they're it's tough because you could probably give a hundred times more stuff than you even are giving to most couples. But at the end of the day, you're just you're probably navigating this like, well, it's too much information. Because I'm even just thinking, like, man, that's the breakdown of time, like, if you're gonna look at it in a like if you're an analytical mind, maybe like some couples are not that way, but if you are and you're gonna look at it like, okay, we're gonna spend, you know, 10 minutes doing this, 10 minutes doing that, 10 minutes doing this, and then 10 minutes doing that, and then we're gonna dance for two hours. It's like, well, if we consolidate this stuff, we can get an extra half an hour of dancing, and that's what we want to spend time doing. It sounds like what you're saying is like there's probably a way to do that.

SPEAKER_00 28:28

There's always there's always a way. There's and when with the huge disclaimer of like you can have what you want, but you can't like you can't have everything you want. It's weird because like some couples will come in wanting all this stuff, and I'm like, you can have that, but like here's the cost. So it's like you can have it all, but you can't have it all because there's if you're with a budget, yeah. Yeah, like you can't have all these activities and think you're still gonna have three hours of dancing. Like if you want to do send-off, private last dance, a bouquet dedication, and then the photo dash, like you're getting an hour of dance floor. It's just like, or you you have to pay for extra time at your venue. Like, you don't have to do it all to say you did it all. Like, really sit down and think about what you want on your wedding day, what's gonna make you feel the best, and like what's not gonna overwhelm you so much because it's such a small time frame to do so much, it's very overwhelming.

SPEAKER_01 29:30

It's so crazy. Is there is there a part of the planning process? So, like, I'm just thinking of the couples that are are looking at the planning process and they're just like already stressed, just like looking at the process. They're like, oh gosh. Is there something in that planning process from your vantage point in the years that you've been doing this? That's like, hey, if you do this or do that, you're gonna be like less stressed and it's gonna be more enjoyable.

SPEAKER_00 29:58

So, like, one, I want to say no, because wedding planning is just stressful. So don't ever think like I can do it and I I won't be stressed. Like, it's always gonna come with stress, whether you like it or not. But there's ways to minimize that. And I would say not you don't need everyone's opinion. Like talk to your vendors for their opinions, but you don't need your sister's opinion, you don't need your mom's opinion, you don't need your best friend's opinion, and like what they did on their wedding day, like you don't have to hear about it again, you don't have to do it just because they said they that you they did it, and like just really sitting there and knowing it's okay that you don't need to get their opinions. Some people be like, Oh, I have to ask my Aunt Barb because like she only has one daughter and she's probably never gonna get married, so like I have to, and like you really don't have to. There's other ways to acknowledge Aunt Barb, then, but that's gonna be so much more stressful because what if their opinion clashes with like what someone else's opinion? You like that better? It's like you're building all these little stressors up that you don't need.

SPEAKER_01 30:59

Yeah, no, it's great advice. I mean, at the end of the day, it's going to be your day that you're remembering. Aunt Barb might be like, Cool, I loved your wedding day, but sh how much is she really gonna be like thinking back on that day, like like the couple will be?

SPEAKER_00 31:17

Rather than like you do Aunt Barb's receiving line that she said you had to have, and you're like, no, but instead you like have like a dessert that's

Trends, Time Traps, And Priorities

SPEAKER_00 31:25

called like Aunt Barb's cupcake, and like Aunt Barb's cupcake, that's so fun. Like, then they got a photo of it, maybe get like a fun photo with it, rather than the 8,000 guests you have to do a receiving line because Aunt Barb was like, I think it'd be a good idea, and you couldn't hurt her feelings. Yeah, yeah. There's just so many ways, and like that's where experienced people will come in and help you with that. If you just bring it up, is that making a noise? No, if you just bring it up to them, I'll help you. They'll help you. Book at the booking house, I'll help you.

SPEAKER_01 31:52

Obviously, a big part of your job outside of keeping things organized during the actual wedding day is that like planning process, like we've been talking about. Has that process changed much for you as you've kind of like learned more and and now you kind of have a different perspective on anything?

SPEAKER_00 32:11

Um yeah, I think I've just narrowed it down to like better questions, like what do I need to know? What can I get it get from a vendor that's not gonna be like the redundancy, you know? So that stuff and like advising the couple on what I'll need from them, like more so, like giving them more direction. I think I've really got gotten a good understanding of like what couple because in my head, just because I know it doesn't mean the couple knows it. So I think really learning how to communicate that to them, tell them like what I'll need, what they should do, that is just cohesive with like checking off the boxes to get them to the day with the least amount of stress. Because the redundancy can be like everyone's asking them the same questions, you know.

SPEAKER_01 32:52

I did just so we just had a wedding. I don't know what's going out, but in November we had a wedding, and we don't usually get to work with planners just in general, but planners that are like really on it. And she set up the final meeting. I would normally just be setting up a meeting between me and the couple, and we'd talk about video stuff. I'd have a questionnaire and all that stuff. And it just got me thinking, I'm like, man, how many more times it'd be nice just to like have like one vendor meeting for them to just jump on one time, hour, hour and a half long? The planner does all this the stuff, and then I can jump in with my couple things that I want to talk to them about. Um, because it they do.

SPEAKER_00 33:33

No, and it's like I would love for something like that, but it's so hard to get because like you're here saying like you saw the value in it, you understand it. With how many different men some vendors are like, no, we gotta talk to the couple.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

But I did she said that and I did feel that way. I was like, oh man, I want to talk to them. But I think I was more so wanting that like personal connection because we didn't get a chance to do a lot of chatting specifically with this couple early in the process. Um, but I was just like, it makes sense to just like condense it all. Like we do the all the stuff. I get to talk about the couple things that are like video specific, and then they feel taken care of and everyone's on the same page.

SPEAKER_00 34:17

Yeah. And like that's what I like want to get like to something like that, like where there's some way that like even just them confirming like the event time frame, like all these like minuscule questions that like I've asked and they've been asked, da la la la la. So in my meetings, because sometimes I'll get to them like right after they've had their photography or DJ meeting, or like I'll get to them right before. And like, luckily, if it's before, I'll be able to like tell them these questions are probably what your DJ's gonna ask. So, like when you get that first draft of the timeline, before they even ask you, like, send them this. So, like, I've been trying to do something like that so that it like gets rid of the vol the pure volume of questions. Because some of the questionnaires, and I get it, like you really want to get another question. Ours is long, ours is 50 questions, and it's like, so take that, and then it's the DJ asking that. The cater asking about 20,000 more, which is needed. Yeah, but then like there has to just be a way that it can be better because they just are so annoyed by the end of it, they're just like Do they tell you that they're annoyed? Oh, almost all the time. For real. Almost all the time. Not even they don't say annoyed, they're like, It's just done.

SPEAKER_01 35:26

Done.

SPEAKER_00 35:26

They're just like, this person's asking me, and they're like, they just try they think they answer a question or like they asked the wrong question, or they thought they updated me on something. That's why, like, when I send my final timeline out, like the couple trust that the questions like that I've asked them that the vendors I'm sending it to are gonna see it. Because if they just updated me on like a song change or something, and it's like the one week out, and I'm sending it out to the vendors, I put in my thing. Like, please read it thoroughly. And like, because I've read all of your stuff thoroughly and put it in. Like, can you just please look it over and tell me before wedding day? Before wedding day. Say with us now because the day of

Reducing Stress And Limiting Opinions

SPEAKER_00 36:10

when I get asked a question that could have been answered, yeah, and I'm like either super busy or like or they're like, Well, should we just go ask the couple? I'm like, Don't don't you dare go anywhere near them. Leave them alone. Leave them alone. Like, what the heck? It's not about you, it's not. Yeah, so yeah, it's just frustrating when you have answers, you send them out, they don't look at it, and then day of, I'll hear them jump over me, go talk to the couple. They're like, Okay, and you and did you want this song? And they're like looking at me and they're like, Yeah, and I'm like, AWS in my timeline. Oh I want to do like ASMR, like ASMI timeline. Oh man. Don't you dare clap. That's going in.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

I'm not clapping anything. Um, it's just frustrating. It's just very and it's frustrating, like well, it's I think the thing that's potentially tough is if a vendor has that like singular mindset, like I can kind of get in that frame of reference sometimes where it's like I I do have this video that I need to produce for the couple. Like if they are expecting me to do the thing that I normally do with the video, right? And if that's all that I'm thinking about, I'm not gonna be like as concerned with your timeline or your question or this or that. But if I take a collaborative approach with it, then I'm like, oh, okay. I hear and see what you're saying, I hear and see what you're saying. We're all on the same page, everything's good.

SPEAKER_00 37:45

Yeah, and I'm not saying when I send the timeline out, you have to memorize it, get flashcards, and go take a test on it. All I'm saying is like it's a collaborative of like everyone's main things with more detail. So, like, if it's something so specific of like reception, you know, the flow of event, like it's in the timeline, and it maybe you had something else because of something like you had thought out that is very video specific. Like maybe double check that ahead of time so that we could talk it out before rather than day of, you're like, oh wait, I'm just now seeing this, and I don't think that's gonna work for the video. And I'm like, that's the least you could have done when I said the timeline, you know? Does everything look good? You don't have to look at everything else. Yeah, it's just like, and it just goes into the redundancy, and like just the couples are just like, why do we have to take away from their day with the that little stuff because you couldn't sit down and look at something, and now like it kind of puts like a bitter taste in their mouth, you know?

SPEAKER_02 38:45

Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:46

By the by like literally right after ceremony, they're just already like it's already been a lot of a day because they've been here, they've been like taking photos, they're dressed, and like ensure something there's always something that happens at these. Always or mom has to go and tell her something. You're just like, shut up, Barb, zip it.

SPEAKER_01 39:03

Barb's really getting a lot of flack today.

SPEAKER_00 39:05

Why am I saying barb home?

SPEAKER_01 39:06

And aunt.

unknown 39:08

Barb.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

Sorry, Barb.

SPEAKER_00 39:10

I honestly have nothing against any barbs. I don't know how many barbs.

SPEAKER_01 39:13

We're not we're not talking about a specific barb, are we?

SPEAKER_00 39:16

No. Okay, I didn't know if I think that's like my like Aunt Sue, Barb.

SPEAKER_01 39:20

That's like your Karen.

SPEAKER_00 39:21

It's my go-to, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:22

Okay, gotcha.

SPEAKER_00 39:22

I don't say Karen unless it's like I know you.

SPEAKER_01 39:25

Like really bad. Okay, so Barb. We'll stick with Barb.

SPEAKER_00 39:28

Yeah, but I don't know. I get fierce about the timeline thing because I'm always putting myself in the couple's shoes, and I don't think all vendors do that as much because, like, do you really want to be asked that many questions on like the biggest day of your life that you spent all this money on vendors to handle for you?

SPEAKER_01 39:43

Yeah. Well, and I feel like like I try to get everything that I would need from them before the wedding day. So, like, they know what we're doing with audio, they know what we're doing with lights, they know what to expect from us and like how we're gonna present ourselves on the day. Like that way, there is less of

Killing Redundancy With Better Systems

SPEAKER_01 40:05

the like video specific things. It's not like, hey, when do you want to do your interview? It's like, hey, when you're ready, I have a spot over here. You can sit down, I'll clip this mic on you, take two seconds, and then we can just jump right into it.

SPEAKER_00 40:18

And that's so good because by the time it's like that point of the day, like they don't want to be asked another question. They want you to be like, hey, are you ready? Yeah, exactly. They just like are like, do not ask me a single other question.

SPEAKER_01 40:31

And then I sit down and proceed to ask them questions.

SPEAKER_00 40:33

Those are questions that you're doing. Those are good questions. Yeah, that's what they want to answer.

SPEAKER_01 40:36

I look so bad because they are start crying and they just finish their hair and makeup. I'm like, I'm so sorry.

SPEAKER_00 40:41

But sorry, really last thing on the timeline thing. So, like when the couples hire like a planner or a coordinator, that's good. They I think use you as like a communicative tool in that like last few days coming up because like in the last few days, you're so in on like the family end of it and like the actual day happening that like if they're telling you an update, they're like, okay, like expecting me to communicate that and then the vendors to hear it from me. So it's like when that does happen, they don't want to be telling me, then the DJ, and then the photographer as well. If it's like something that has been maneuvered. So that's what's really frustrating is like I feel like some vendors don't respect that like that last minute thing could come up, and like we are then hired to handle it and like leave them alone.

SPEAKER_01 41:27

And I I love when there is someone like what you're describing, because then there's stuff like we just don't have to worry about it. Like, if you guys are on it in your role, I don't have to focus about anything other than just capturing the video.

SPEAKER_00 41:44

Yeah, and that's what you should do.

SPEAKER_01 41:45

And worrying about my job.

SPEAKER_00 41:46

Because when they do update me, and if it is gonna be like I'm thinking as a videographer, photographer, DJ, and caterer, like, and then like if it's something that's not realistic, like I'm the one, like I know I'm not I'm not your jobs, but I'm thinking in the shoes of like all like I have you just have to. So it's like just to trust that like I'm not just like oh, I'm only here for the venue. Like I am not like I'm not doing everything just to make sure the booking house looks good. The booking house looks good without me needing to do anything, honey. Looks great, it's fine. I'm here for the couple, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 42:24

Which is I mean, I can't imagine that every venue has a you that could say that. Do you know what I mean though?

SPEAKER_00 42:35

I know. Um definitely one of a kind.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

And I mean that seriously though. It's like they would do everything in their power to make the venue look good and not necessarily everything in their power to serve the couple the best.

SPEAKER_00 42:49

And I get that's tough if you're like a new vendor and you're just like, I don't fully know what to expect, but like I think you can read it in my communication and like the effort to put in the timeline and maybe like just respecting that until like if there's a newer planner, a newer wedding coordinator, they're just kind of getting their their footing.

SPEAKER_01 43:11

Well, like, and they're excited, right? They're excited kind of like you were when you first started. You were like fresh, excited, like diving into it headfirst, maybe like getting thrown off the deep end a little bit. What's your best advice for that vendor getting started? Like, what should they watch out for? What should they do to like help kind of like get their business off the ground, up and running?

SPEAKER_00 43:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:35

Um, I would say maybe it could even be like systems too that you you have to kind of keep yourself organized and stuff.

SPEAKER_00 43:41

My systems have just changed throughout the years, so it's so hard. But in the beginning, I think I I did too almost too much prep and like almost like studied for like an upcoming event, like it was like a test. And I think that's definitely a good advice because like knowing Everything the day of is gonna be so helpful if you're just starting out because then like you don't even know what you don't know yet. So you should know everything that you do know and you can know the day of so that when something that's inevitably gonna happen that you don't know comes up, like you can put your attention on that and like everything else is just you just know it. Like know the mom and dad's names, like know them. Like that will like go, they will literally be like, Oh my gosh, like she remembered like all of our names. And like if you do something like dumb that like messed up, they don't even see it because they're like, She remembered our names, like for the older couple. So, like, yeah, knowing your audience, I think being your couple's cheerleader is like the best. So, like not being annoying about it, but like keeping the vibe up, keeping also calm when it is time to walk down the aisle, like hitting those things and then building oning and learning from your mistakes and asking questions and getting to know vendors, like I think that's huge in the beginning. It's really hard though. I just think you just are gonna learn as the events keep going and keep yourself accountable, know what you did right and wrong, and what what'd you do wrong and how can I fix it? I don't know. I feel like I look at it very sports-minded, but if you don't have a sports background, it I don't know. I'm like, if you don't, if you never kicked a ball around in your life, you might not know. But yeah, I take like I've I took notes and I do take notes after each event because it can blur together, but like then I can like look back and remember it and yeah, just like a full circle. Now I just I don't even I shouldn't even say that. I do kind of jump into things, but I think you basically said it. I know I really did, but I just it's like almost muscle memory.

SPEAKER_01 45:38

It's like so, yeah, it's all just there.

SPEAKER_00 45:40

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 45:41

Yeah, no, I feel like that's great advice. It's been uh awesome picking apart the things that you know and the things that you've experienced over the years. And I love how strongly opinated you are on some things. I it's like a breath of fresh air, honestly. But I would love for you to kind of just give us, uh give the

Advice For New Vendors Starting Out

SPEAKER_01 46:00

listener, the couples that are listening, kind of just like your last parting wisdom, your your best advice for them.

SPEAKER_00 46:08

When everything happens, it happens so fast and it's so exciting. But I think it is very important to like really sit down in the beginning of planning and like have a very deep, nice, fun discussion about like, what do we think we want for the day? And like what are our priorities? Like, do we really want to have like a lot of time to talk to people, or like we just like want to get to the party? Like, because I think couples will start to almost like turn against each other because they don't have that conversation in the beginning, and like one person's on one page, one person's on the other page, and like it's getting closer and closer, and the decisions have been made, and then they're like, What do you what? What what what? And then they're just like it's like reaches a boiling point, and then they hate each other before their wedding day. And I'm like, because like you're not on the same page in the beginning. And like just if you think like your fiance doesn't want to be involved, I'm sure they do in some point. So make it a fun night where like you just have some wine and watch a movie and just like sketch it out and like have fun with it. It doesn't have to be like we are check marking this, this, like just make it funny. I don't know. That's what I personally would do. Some people are more analytical, but that's something I really want to talk about because like when it does come time for planning, like because they're getting in two different pages, like big things that they think that they didn't even know they wanted might not have happened. Like, some I'll offer couples to do like a first look of like the like setup reception before it gets like destroyed by the guests. And sometimes they'll just be like, nah. And then afterwards they're like, oh man, like I really wish we'd have done that because they didn't have enough built-in couple time together. And it's like if maybe if they would have told like their coordinator in the beginning, like, yeah, we're really looking to like build in because we are doing like with a first look or without a first look. I think you need to build in one-on-one time because it's just a lot. So yeah, knowing what you want so that your vendors can guide you.

SPEAKER_01 48:00

Yeah, I well, I love the idea of like knowing what you want in that like 3,000-foot view.

SPEAKER_00 48:06

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 48:06

Of just like super general, like generic. Like, do we want to spend a lot of time partying? Do we want to just like hang out with our people? Do we want to be at the bar? Do we want to mingle? Like, do we want to be at Coxflower? Like, just like these big generalizations of like this would be fun. That would be fun. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:27

I love cookies. Let's do a half cookie, half cupcakes. Like making it just like in your head start to come alive, like in a fun way, rather than like, I feel like they'll start off details two separate islands and details. And that's just like not, I don't know, weddings, people have just the fun just gets sucked out a lot. Oh, for sure. It's a lot. So yeah, just remembering it's literally about two people. That's you two. And what do you two want and keep making it fun as it goes? Like, I love that. It's gonna be stressful. So build in like fun little things that it's not always sitting down and being so analytical.

SPEAKER_01 49:04

Yeah, I love that.

SPEAKER_00 49:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 49:06

Elia, thank you so much for being on the podcast. Yeah, it was so great. Um, where can people find and follow along with what you're doing here at the booking house?

SPEAKER_00 49:15

Yeah, so go to the booking house's Instagram or website, um, follow along through there. Uh Brit handles all the social media and she posts like stuff of me doing stuff on the day of and all stuff, booking house wedding stuff. So follow through there. And then um, if you're interested in the coordinating service through the booking house with myself, um, inquire with Britt and she'll direct you to me. And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 49:40

Yeah, that's so fun.

SPEAKER_00 49:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 49:42

Um, I have enjoyed working with you and the couple weddings that we've done together. It's been so fun.

SPEAKER_00 49:48

Hopefully, we'd do more.

SPEAKER_01 49:49

I know, that'd be so fun. Um, but I appreciate you being on and kind of just like demystifying some of this like what is wedding coordination and what's it not, and kind of even just some things for couples to kind of watch out for. And I appreciate your willingness to go to Bat for Couples. Um, and I hope you know vendors that are listening can kind of pull from that and do more of that for their couples too.

SPEAKER_00 50:14

I hope so too. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 50:16

Yeah, um, if you're watching on YouTube, thank you so much for watching. If you

Aligning As A Couple And Final Takeaways

SPEAKER_01 50:20

could, you know, throw us a little subscribe, maybe like this video. If you have questions for myself or Leo, you can drop those down in the comments. I will be there if you have questions.

SPEAKER_00 50:29

Be nice.

SPEAKER_01 50:31

Please. No, just kidding. Um, I appreciate you guys watching. Um, and if you're listening, wherever you listen to podcasts, what's up? How's it going? Thanks for listening. Appreciate you. What if I don't like you're walking or if you're running or if you're like driving your car, hope you're having a great day. I really do. I really hope you'd have a great day. Um, but if you could, it'd be really, really, really helpful if you could leave us a review. Just let us know how you're liking the show. Um, and share it with all of your friends, because that'd be really helpful for the show. But uh, that's all for this episode. Appreciate you guys tuning in, and we'll catch you next time on the preferred list.