Real Love, Real Life
Real Love Real Life dives into the unfiltered reality of relationships—dating, marriage, heartbreak, healing, and everything in between. It's honest talk about love and life, filled with real stories, hard truths, and the kind of laughs that come from lived experience.
No fluff, just facts, feelings, and a whole lot of growth.
Real Love, Real Life
EP 7: Don’t Let the Hustle Hurt Your Relationship
Ever choose sleep over intimacy? Yeah… you’re not the only one.
In this real talk episode, we unpack why physical connection takes a backseat when life gets heavy, think about default parenting, mental load, body image struggles, and even kids co-sleeping between you.
It’s not about excuses, though. We get into both sides: the frustration of rejection, the exhaustion of always being “on,” and the small but real ways couples can show up for each other again.
🎧 Tune in for laughs, honesty, and practical tips to bring back connection when “I’m tired” has become the norm.
Hello everybody, welcome back to Real Love, real Life Podcast. I am your host, jasmine and I'm Ernesto. How was your week?
Speaker 2:It was long, but we made it we made it through the week. Boys, first week back to school. Man, it's just been hectic. Yeah, that's probably why the traffic is even more hectic. Huh, Dude, and technically not. Has everybody started school? Or some people start next week?
Speaker 1:I don't know.
Speaker 2:What's up with school starting in July?
Speaker 1:I just remember going back in august we always went back in august and now football season starting now a lot of schools are in.
Speaker 2:July is it because there's like sacrificing, like days off during the school year, or what are they doing?
Speaker 1:I'm not sure, but the trap. So our kids started this week on Monday and the majority of the school started on Wednesday. I don't know why or Thursday too, huh yeah, wednesday or Thursday. So Monday and Tuesday when I took them to school there was like no traffic. We were getting there like so fast. And then Wednesday, when I was dropping them off, I was like why is there so much traffic?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Kevin was like a minute or two late and I was like well, everybody's starting school, we have to now get out of the house a little bit earlier so yeah. And it's only going to get worse.
Speaker 2:Maybe one of them has to walk to school and the other one gets a ride. Sorry, no, just kidding.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's really hectic. I don't like driving. I can't wait to move somewhere with a lot less people.
Speaker 2:Yeah, can you?
Speaker 1:remember like, even like five years ago, the traffic was like it wasn't even that bad in Phoenix, and then out of nowhere, like where did you all come from?
Speaker 2:I think like, like when I first started the trade. If you're if you got out at one o'clock, 12, oh, the freeway was dead. If you're driving at four in the morning, the freeways are dead. Yeah, now this morning, when I was driving to work 4 30 in the morning, there's already a pile of yeah, I'm just like gotta get off.
Speaker 2:The good thing I bought donuts today, because not only did I go late again, I had to get off the freeway and I'm just like, oh man, good thing I got donuts because I'm working with an old school cat, so he wants you to show up five minutes before the time starts. I'm like dude, we got to walk a quarter, like three quarters of a mile, into the job site. I need a five minute grace period of, not five before, five after.
Speaker 1:So do you technically clock in when you like, before you start walking or when you already walked and you're at the job?
Speaker 2:site. He just wants to see you right there at 455.
Speaker 1:Oh, no, yeah, no.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'm just like, all right, I think I found his weakness food, so I'm at the go to Costco. Costco, get like the king-size candy. I might have to buy some chimichangas and buy a little uh, deep fryer so I could fry them up in the morning but I hear.
Speaker 1:I made you some breakfast you're gonna have to buy him.
Speaker 2:Come in at six o'clock, just for breakfast and you're good. I'm good it's perfect because it gets way chill after he eats.
Speaker 1:So that also works with me too. You you can always bring food after work and I'll be very happy that I don't have to cook dinner. I have an eyelash that's really bothering me. If there is a mobile lash tech in Arizona, in the Valley please message me. It has to be mobile though.
Speaker 2:Or like only at the house.
Speaker 1:So yeah, I have. I have like severe anxiety and the only time I got my eyelashes done once and I was at the girl's house and I was laying there and I couldn't stop twitching, like the fact that you have to lay there and not move with your eyes closed for like two to three hours. That is like the worst anxiety I have ever experienced in my life yeah, so I feel like maybe if I'm at home I'd be like okay, like I can nap or something, I'll nap easily how much is it expensive?
Speaker 2:it's depends, huh yeah it's.
Speaker 1:It's pretty pricey. It depends like who you go with. You know how much like experience they have.
Speaker 2:I would even pay them a little extra more for you, just to be like all right, there's gonna be twitching, there's gonna be fussing, I'll pay you another 30 minutes of like, just so you can get a walk around real quick. Okay, go, sit back down yeah you know what I mean, just because they, they don't want that like.
Speaker 1:They want to get it all done.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you want to get in, get out I can't.
Speaker 1:like. My leg kept twitching and the girl was like are you okay? And I was like, yeah, but like I wasn't okay. And when, like I got out of there, I cried on my way home and the eyelashes were falling out and I, after I literally paid like I don't know, like almost 200 bucks, but yeah, and then also, um, I forgot to add my freckles. So I've been adding like freckles, little like Huda from.
Speaker 1:Love Island. I've been. I don't watch that show, but people were telling me they were like are you, huda from Love Island, now adding freckles every morning? I feel like. Why that chick has freckles or she has freckles she literally wakes up and starts adding freckles, and that's what I've been doing, and I mean you even said it. You were like I feel like you have personality.
Speaker 2:When you put yeah, it does like switch it up a lot.
Speaker 1:It's pretty cool I forgot my freckles, but you'll see them on next week's episode anyways. Um, I don't even know how long we just talked for about literally nothing but today's topic. Are you ready? Is why women stop doing the deed when life gets busy? Or is it that we don't want it? Or is it that we are just tired af?
Speaker 2:what does that have to do with me?
Speaker 1:hold on what do you mean? What does that have to do with you? That has everything to do with you, and maybe husbands that are gonna watch this, or I feel like a lot of women are gonna be able to relate to this. I'm not gonna say everybody, um, but I feel like when you don't get mad at me, I feel like when you're, you're the default parent. In this case, I am the default parent. Don't get me wrong. You are an amazing dad. We love you and we appreciate everything you do for us, but I am the default parent. Aka pick-ups and drop-offs, doctor's appointments, dentist's appointments, like you know, all of these stuff Like I'm in charge of, like putting away, like the documents when we come back from a trip, like you know, like that person that is just kind of like on top of everything.
Speaker 2:I don't remember you putting anything back when we got back from camping.
Speaker 1:And well, that stuff that you put in the attic.
Speaker 2:You didn't help. So, I'm tired. What if I'm tired and that affects our relationship?
Speaker 1:You didn't help. I'm tired. What if I'm tired? And that affects our relationship. Those are things that burn you out, and it's not that I don't, or it's not that we don't want it, it's just that my flesh is on, that we are burnt out, just say that instead of making excuses, then I think you can't be burnt out for three months straight.
Speaker 1:No Well, yeah, you can be burnt out for three months straight. No well, yeah, you can, you absolutely can. You don't, you can't tell somebody how long their burnout is gonna last. You stop it, take a deep breath, um, because I know that there's there's probably a lot of men in your position.
Speaker 2:Yeah, men existing now are just suffering man.
Speaker 1:I've been going through a burnout.
Speaker 2:You know there's a saying that says men have to work 20 times no, five times as hard to get a woman, 20 times as worse as their grandma.
Speaker 1:Wait, say that again.
Speaker 2:Men have to work four times harder than their grandpas to get a woman 20 times worse than their grandma. Wow, something like that. Something like that Maybe.
Speaker 1:Well, I mean.
Speaker 2:Grandma had 15 kids. Nowadays you're lucky to get one or two.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, but I mean, everything is more expensive. And also, you can't lie, lie. A lot of men want to act like a princess now, and not I'm not saying you, I'm saying a lot of men want to act like princesses now. So women are scared scared of what?
Speaker 2:to bring more babies into this world apparently not if all the dudes are bums that they're having kids with.
Speaker 1:Well, that's what I'm saying. That's why it's hard to get all of these kids out of a woman. When before a woman would pop out 15 kids Because she had a hardworking man that, literally, like you know, 100% provided you know, woman wouldn't go out like that back then and have to, or they wouldn't have to. They, they just knew that they were gonna bring all right, perfect example.
Speaker 2:When we first met, you were working two jobs, you weren't burnt out and you would be at my house but it was new.
Speaker 1:It was new so obviously it's like. It's like when you get a new car, like when I first got my car, I was like, oh, like I'm gonna drive to walmart really quick, like every like I wanted to drive it three, four times, five times a day. And now I'm like like I really have to move this big old thing so, exactly.
Speaker 2:So how does the guy feel? The car he he uses has more miles on it. They don't start up like it used to so it turned into a nice yeah back to um, you know our grandmas and stuff again, excuse me.
Speaker 1:You know our grandmas and stuff again, Excuse me. My grandpa, like, built my grandma's house with his own hands.
Speaker 2:There's 25 houses in the village.
Speaker 1:Hold on, hold on, and literally like she never had to leave the house for anything. You know they weren't rich, but they were like in their little.
Speaker 2:They're wealthy In their little town.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they were like the. Yeah, the ones that had it. And so heck, yeah, she was popping these babies out like it was nothing. So now it's it sucks, but it's kind of like you see a woman with a kid there with a man and then another one and another one, because they suck so that that, exactly that means you got to show more appreciation to the guy that got the used car.
Speaker 2:but you want to the used car, but you want it, the used car, but you want us to act like it's brand new.
Speaker 1:Is he comparing us to a used car? Yeah, and I do.
Speaker 2:You want us to pay full value for a used car.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I even paid double for this.
Speaker 2:Show some appreciation.
Speaker 1:I appreciate you.
Speaker 2:Apparently not If I can't get some sometime. Appreciation, I appreciate you, I'm just apparently not if I can't get some sometime. You would think it's crazy how like girls can lay up with straight up bums. Well, because we don't like homie guys all the energy in the world, because he's a bum. He just lays up all day are you done?
Speaker 1:no, I'm still going okay, okay, let's let him go while I collect my thoughts, so I can keep going. You were saying Going.
Speaker 2:You really rudely interrupted me.
Speaker 1:No, you're talking about how, like you know, women are attracted to bums Not all of them. Some of us have been really dumb previously, but we've made it better.
Speaker 2:Did you have a question?
Speaker 1:Um, I didn't have a question, it was just, you know, I had wrote down some notes, cause sometimes I forget stuff, especially when I'm burnt out like I am right now. You know, with the back to school and all that Um. So yeah, I was just going to say that. You know, sometimes the to school and all that um. So yeah, I was just gonna say that, you know, sometimes the last thing on our mind is is the deed, like that's the last thing on our mind.
Speaker 1:Like you guys have gone to work and I know, I know you, you have a very busy, dangerous job. You know you could fall from like a 30 foot. You know building and all of that, and you're like an extreme heat, um. But you know us at home, where we've already like done the drop-offs, the pickups, dinner. You know the dogs, um, which lately they've been stressing me out like so much Um.
Speaker 1:So we've we've done all of these things already and and then you know the husband comes home from work and you know he wants the deed and it's like, dude, I'm exhausted and you haven't even checked in on me yet, you haven't even gave me some loving, you haven't even told me that I'm pretty while I'm wearing like this 4X t-shirt on that has like oil stains all over it. You know, yeah, we it's hard, it's hard to be intimate when you know sometimes we don't feel pretty, we don't feel like good about ourselves. Um, we have so much going on and then, and then the man's just there like when are you going to come to bed? And I'm like, okay, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you're saying if I were to help, help with more stuff.
Speaker 1:Oh well, I was going to leave that Like.
Speaker 2:I mean even when I was at home hold on. When I took time off work and I was literally at home all the time.
Speaker 1:Well, you can't even lie. You were getting some more when you were at home. Yes, you were. Yes, you were. I know your memory is a little off sometimes, but yes, you were when we were both at home. You can absolutely say that it was a lot better.
Speaker 2:That's true.
Speaker 1:It is true. And then also we do have a four-year-old that stays home all the time, so the days that you couldn't, it was because obviously he was there.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:But when we were able to, you know, get your parents to watch him or, you know, hang out with him, that would happen. So, again, I believe that it all goes back to that, to like the burnout. Um, just, maybe we're not tired like physically, like you know we weren't building stuff like you guys are, but it's like more like mentally, like tired you know, do you have anything to say about that?
Speaker 2:yeah, I mean, I feel like even when I was working two jobs in here, I stay home, mom. I feel like there's a lot of times, too, I'm dying. Well.
Speaker 1:I will again.
Speaker 2:I've been up since the crack of dawn.
Speaker 1:Again, stay-at-home mom, it's I just want to dive through that damn wall.
Speaker 2:Two damn jobs waking up at the crack of dawn and I got a hassle. For some that's yeah, that's a tragedy okay, um you feel me. Comment below, guys, comment y'all feel me. What world is this coming to?
Speaker 1:maybe the men, but women are totally gonna understand me. And again you guys, I feel like a bunch of victims.
Speaker 2:You guys um, girls can post a picture of their foot and make millions of dollars. You guys are complaining you do work hard, you do work hard, but it's like there's no but at the end of the day. It's like you you got to prioritize stuff too.
Speaker 1:I will I.
Speaker 2:I don't ask for much in this world. I don't ask for much in this world.
Speaker 1:I was, I was going there.
Speaker 2:That wasn't.
Speaker 1:That wasn't OK. I have my stuff in sections.
Speaker 2:OK.
Speaker 1:I was going there, I was going to say you know, and try to motivate everybody watching that's going through this, like I know that you must be exhausted, like I am the default parent and all of that, but at the end of the day, you know, that's our partner and we love them and we have to take some time to prioritize our partner.
Speaker 2:Yep.
Speaker 1:And and it's something that I'm working on and I hope that you know well it is. I don't hope it's going to get better. Um, you just, you know, you just can't snap your fingers and like you're back to you're. You're throwing it back like you used to. It takes some time, okay, um yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, Also, I do just want to throw out there, because you know we're going to have a lot of new viewers, listeners. He's like that and you have to get used to it. I feel like our TikTok viewers already know this stuff yeah. And they already know how you talk and they're like oh, you know, we they'll take that from you, but I'm like so scared for new people to watch you or like people on instagram yeah um, because they're gonna be like you know, you let him talk to you like that, or I remember there was this video that you came out in um, I don't remember what video it was.
Speaker 1:I think it was the one where I was like giving myself the shot. And and when I posted on TikTok, people were actually being supportive and stuff and it was funny. You know I couldn't do it Took me like 20 tries to to do the freaking shot. And then when I posted on Instagram, I had comments of people are like um, I feel so sad for her, the way he talks to her, the way he treats her, because he said just do it already.
Speaker 2:Bunch of sensitive Sally's over here.
Speaker 1:But that's like, that's how he is and he's. You know, you were like, just do it Like it was. It was like 20 tries and I was like no, no, and you know, but you guys don't know they're like be more considerate, more compassionate, just get it over with already it's like.
Speaker 2:It's like when you're gonna throw up man, stick your finger and throw and just get it over with.
Speaker 1:Don't be like, no, get it over know that, you know he's, that's how he is and yeah, like I'm okay if anything he needs to be looked out for. Uh, okay, also the disconnection that can happen like after kids Kids, obviously, when I came in the picture or you came in the picture, I already had the two older boys, so I feel like that's never really been like a thing.
Speaker 1:But, obviously, when we had baby John and he starts growing, it's like no, so like we. How do you say it? Co-sleep? We sleep together, we sleep with John.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, our fault. We never got him used to his own bed and that's okay. You know, don't judge people for the way they do things in their household. John is four years old and he still sleeps with us, and he's been sleeping with us since he was born.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Sometimes he don't, but sometimes he does Like he recently started sleeping with his older brothers, but he's always been sleeping with us, so that is also something you know that affects it. Like he, I mean four years.
Speaker 2:Sorry, little homie, it's time for you to bounce it's time to skedaddle.
Speaker 1:He's four years old and I mean he likes to sleep, and he likes to sleep in the middle of us. So again, I feel like kids can also be a huge part of that. So there's that. John needs his own bed, his own room. Yeah, he really does. He's going to need a little bed next to, um, his brother's bed, cause I took the extra room for my office.
Speaker 2:Bunk beds now.
Speaker 1:Um, did I already go over this? Um that you know I don't always feel sexy, so it's hard to want. Hold on Tyler, can I say the word sex? I would actually want that to come out. Okay, to want Hold on Tyler, can I say the word sex?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I would actually want that to come out. Okay, okay, so I don't always Just say intercourse.
Speaker 1:That sounds ugly.
Speaker 2:Be proper.
Speaker 1:So I feel like and yeah, that is on me, like and yeah, that is on me, you know, I know that I've gained weight and it's on me that sometimes like I don't get ready and stuff, but sometimes we just don't don't feel how we used to, how you said like, oh, when we first met, you know it was, it was all the time and I was always going over, even if I had two jobs. But I, I really liked the way I looked then and so that's like a huge thing too.
Speaker 2:Although.
Speaker 1:I am confident, right. I've never, I've never, it's never. It's not like it's ever been, like you know damn, I'm ugly. Yeah, like I know I'm not ugly, I just have some extra pounds on me. And even then, like I'm not, I'm not scared of my stomach and stuff, and I feel like you are also really good at you know saying like oh, you have like a nice stomach and things like that. Yeah, so that helps. Remember that one time I was live and people were going ham, oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:I don't think she was on my live. I think Were you working. No, I was gone.
Speaker 1:And then you were, you were on live.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they were tearing me up.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like, I feel like that is.
Speaker 2:And that's the thing. Like I'm not like people be like. I'll just be like, yeah, she's a little thick, but people be like she's fat or she's this, but I'm not like. I know it's just weight that you put on because of whatever, but it's like getting a bad haircut it'll grow back, it can go away.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know what I'm saying so speaking of weight the potential is there, you just need to tap into it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I'm on. I'm on my fourth week of my weight loss shot. I was previously on a weight loss shot for like two months and then I quit because my mom was feeling terrible, and then I started this new one, which I feel great on. Um, I feel like it's moving a little bit slower, but it is moving yeah, and, but you're not feeling like total crap, huh yeah, I'm, I'm not feeling like crap.
Speaker 1:Um, so it's moving, it's moving, it's moving and grooving and I'm excited for that. Um, although I never I'm not chasing skinny, uh, because I actually love being plus size I just I really want to be healthy. Um, I self-diagnosed myself. I think I have PCOS. I also asked ChatGPT, and ChatGPT, like, can almost like, assure me that I have PCOS. I'm super hairy, you know that, but like you know why I have to talk like that, like if we're talking about it.
Speaker 1:I'm super hairy, so like I grow a lot of facial hair and I've been like going to laser and the girl was like, do you have PCOS? Again, like I was like, okay, first it was Google, then it was chat, gpt, and now my laser girl is asking me if I have PCOS. I have PCOS, Like there's no, there's no other like way. So I rarely get periods. Oh, that was another thing. That also, like, when I Google, like why don't I want to do the deed with my husband? Um, deed with my husband, um, like, when you have like irregular, like menstrual cycles, that also is a part of like you know, not wanting not getting stimulated and stuff. And it's actually been four months that I haven't had, um a period or whatever you call it menstrual cycle. So, um, the this weight loss shot actually like is going to help also, um, with like any PCOS symptoms. Uh, because it it like targets your.
Speaker 1:I know it's two hormones, uh, I don't know like what they're called, but I'm actually that's what I'm most excited about I know, like every girl like hates their period, like I cannot wait for my period to come and when it's more regular, because I'm gonna be like oh my god, like I'm a normal woman again.
Speaker 1:It sucks yeah, because it keeps all the like bad stuff and yeah, like it's been four months and I'm just like like when, like around the 20th comes around, when, like I usually like used to get it, and again, like month after month, like it's not here, I'm like what the heck? Like I, you know, so I can't wait to feel like myself again. Um, and yeah, I don't want to have to shave this mustache every other day.
Speaker 2:Line it up. No, just kidding. Um that too you know, get the like that. What's up fool?
Speaker 1:That's what's up. What's up, fool, the PCOS girlies are going to come for you Um let them. I'm. I think that's what I'm most excited about. Like, as much as people want to be like oh, like you know, she's what happened to like being plus size, or you want to be skinny. I really don't. I really don't want to be skinny. I actually love being plus size.
Speaker 2:Um but, what about what I want?
Speaker 1:I'm really excited, so are you not excited?
Speaker 2:I am excited, but when you say plus size, what does plus size mean?
Speaker 1:Well, plus size is not skinny Plus size is not your average Like.
Speaker 2:what are we talking? Like weight-wise?
Speaker 1:No, weight is a number is a number, because there could be a woman that weighs almost 200 pounds and she looks amazing because she has a fat behind and, like you know, nice, like muscly legs and stuff like that. So I, to me, the weight, like the scale is, is a number. Obviously I want to look good, feel good, but I'm most excited to start tackling my health because I've been feeling like crap for months. Um, you know, like the no period, stuff like that, all of that is like it's a lot, it's a lot to deal with, even though, like, yeah, you, you see me and you know, you see healthy, you know, and in general, like she's healthy.
Speaker 1:you don't know like that, just that like can be so much. Again, I know it's self-diagnosed, I self-diagnosed myself with PCOS, but it's a lot. It's a lot of like symptoms every day and it's annoying to live with.
Speaker 2:Lots of digester.
Speaker 1:Are you digesting everything? Is it new? Oh, because it is new to you. Some of it's new you didn't know that I had PCOS.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like you literally hit me with that word today after work. I think I have this. I'm like what is?
Speaker 1:that I didn't even say. I think I was like I have PCOS.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's like I diagnosed.
Speaker 1:He's like should you go to the doctor?
Speaker 2:Google University Damn.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I. I mean you got to go to the doctor regardless I absolutely am. But well, I technically did see the provider when, like through Zoom, when I got on the shot, but don't you need actual blood work to determine this, to determine PCOS?
Speaker 1:yes, because they're going to go in there and see, like, the levels of, like your hormones and stuff. So, yes, like technically, I do have to go see a doctor.
Speaker 2:So so if you were to Google right now, if I haven't got my period in four months, what would Google say? Go to the doctor.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And you haven't went to the doctor, I'll go to the doctor.
Speaker 1:you guys, I promise by the next episode that we come in. I'll like. The first thing I'll say is I went to the doctor, I'll do that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It's on my to do list schedule an appointment. Um, okay, so yeah, just basically, I'm not broken, I'm human.
Speaker 2:I'm going through a lot of stuff I'm working on it, um, and thank you for being patient. Yeah, overly patient. It's just at a point I just feel like I've put it. I've been so patient, put up with putting it behind, not not making a big deal, but it just comes to a point in time where it's like, all right, if you're not gonna prioritize, you know my needs and wants then you know I'm saying there's consequences. I'm not saying it like that, but it's like if, if a guy doesn't do X, y, z, then that's grounds for the woman to break up with him or not be with him. And I'm not saying that I'm going to leave you because you're not giving me the box, but like at what point is like you're basically like making me suffer?
Speaker 1:I don't know why right now Like that's not fair.
Speaker 2:I feel like that's not fair and I bet you a lot of guys nowadays can relate to that on there. Yeah, we get it, we're patient, we're there every day, we gotta do it all the bull and it's like all right, enough's enough. I'm I've heard I'm tired for the 32nd time, like my head hurts. You forgot the head hurts the head hurts yeah, I always use that one like you can't just run and pop a time, drink some water, walk around the damn block Like I've been drinking a lot of water.
Speaker 1:Actually, are you done, john? I feel like John's, like word. It's not fair. It's not fair, you guys.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's not fair. I just feel like. I was going to say something, and if a guy is not doing X, y, z, then you know the whole world crumbles. But when the guy's not happy it's all good, he has to deal with it.
Speaker 1:That's the way life is A lot of us guys don't ask for much or nothing at all, but it's like the simple things. Yeah, I remembered right now that you said I'm not going to leave you or I'm not going to break up with you. I'm not going to leave you or I'm not going to break up with you. I just want to congratulate everybody that has been with their partner for five years or more.
Speaker 1:Congratulations on your wedding and it's like you're here, like it was just announced that if you've been with your partner for five or more years, you are technically married, even if you have not legally married them.
Speaker 2:okay, Like you be present. I mean, we still technically haven't got married. I'm like you want to get married, but you're over here telling me you're tired.
Speaker 1:We're already married.
Speaker 2:You're like.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's done.
Speaker 2:I don't know. I feel I got to admit I guess there's things I can do to help, but I don't think it's 50-50. I think it's like 95-5.
Speaker 1:Absolutely 95-5. 95-5.
Speaker 2:No 5-95.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Lately you can't even lie. That's been on the last thing that you've been prioritizing oh, the absolute last thing. Exactly so. It's like Lately you can't even lie. That's been on the last thing that you've been prioritizing. Exactly so it's like. I know. So I just got to take it on the chin and just Just deal with it, that's not fair.
Speaker 1:Some Thai food would change it all, but what about me Exactly?
Speaker 2:It's just been you, you, you. What about me?
Speaker 1:After Thai food, you can get loving.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:Doesn't work that way.
Speaker 2:No, I don't. Alright, you gotta make it up to me.
Speaker 1:I'm raising your kids. I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding, I'm being silly. I know, I know, I know.
Speaker 2:You just can't admit it.
Speaker 1:There's a lot, I'll admit it right now In front of this camera.
Speaker 2:Do it.
Speaker 1:I do not give Ernesto enough deed, as he should, but I'm working on it. I'm working on it. I'm on my weight loss shots. I've been walking on my walking pad For 10 to 15 minutes every morning. I've been taking my honey sticks and I mean it's obviously working if you got some today, right before this podcast. Okay, yeah but it has to be consistent.
Speaker 2:Like that's the thing, All right, you just get do one time. It's like all right, he's going to shut up for three months.
Speaker 1:Like no, we'll do a check in, we'll do a check-in. We'll do a check-in every episode. How many times do you think is fair for a couple to do it?
Speaker 2:While they're young, at least a day, once a day.
Speaker 1:Once a day. Does Sunday count?
Speaker 2:Because it's laundry day. Well, the laundry's supposed to be done during the week too. It's because everybody just lets problems accumulate to the weekend. When the weekend gets here, it's like no.
Speaker 1:Okay, so the weekend counts too. Sunday counts too, then, so seven days a week.
Speaker 2:At least five.
Speaker 1:Okay, we'll check in next week. So you'll have it five to seven times a week. But not no mediocre shit when he's complaining, then that he's tired.
Speaker 2:I ain't never tired for that. Okay, I could be half dead and just like huh, I could be in my casket, be like and if he here imagine he's like oh my god, that's scary. Um they were like well he was, he was a.
Speaker 1:Yeah right.
Speaker 2:No, but I guess those guys can do something to help.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I feel like you guys just think that you can just whip it out and it's fine.
Speaker 2:What is it?
Speaker 1:Like sheesh, take me to the gas station at least, like for some cheese, some, some chips with some cheese on them, or something first or after, you know, like some, like a little, like a little like treat well, that's the thing, the girls that are that get down and freaky, they get spoiled because they go to work and then you're just like do do, do, do, do.
Speaker 2:You gotta work, you gotta put in work okay, all right.
Speaker 1:Well, he said it. Note to everybody. Um, we'll be spoiled if we're freaky, I guess, if I, if I have a louis vuitton on this table next week, just know I've been going to work no, I gotta admit, I guess I could do some.
Speaker 2:no to admit, I guess I could do some. No, it's not. I guess I can do some stuff to help. Thank you, make your life easier. So I'll give you that. I'm not going to be too much of a hard ass about it. But yeah. I just feel like lately just been needing to put more effort into it.
Speaker 1:OK, that's OK, because I feel like you could put some more effort into it too.
Speaker 2:Like the deed or XYZ.
Speaker 1:In like. No In the deed, but that's it Like what other stuff? You want me to put it Exactly?
Speaker 2:But it's like if you didn't meet me doing certain stuff, you can't expect me to do certain stuff now.
Speaker 1:Same.
Speaker 2:Doesn't work that way we're okay is this how it feels to get old? Would have, like you are. This is five years in. How is 25 years gonna feel? I remember a long time ago you are turning 30. Turning 30.
Speaker 1:Hi, Literally next month. But oh yeah, it's my birthday month. I'm turning 29 on August 27th. Okay, but to wrap it up, you know I will say it's not just all over. It doesn't mean that you don't love your partner. If you are not doing the deed as often, um, I still love you very much.
Speaker 2:I think you are very handsome and but like not handsome enough to get some will you be quiet and let me do this closure you. I'm not done talking, I'm just eating.
Speaker 1:I think you know you still, we still love each other, all of that. But it's a lot of stuff, okay. Yeah, it's a lot of stuff going on and I'm pretty sure a lot of you can relate. You know kids house work, literally like so much. But prioritize your husband, prioritize your man and yeah good that's all I have to say. What about you?
Speaker 2:to close it up, and don't be mean close it up mode like motivational okay, it takes two to tango, so we both have to do our part and prioritizing each other. So no more excuses from either side. Let's help each other out and, you know, do stuff to make us feel young and like I guess, like dates and stuff will help spark it up.
Speaker 2:It's not just like you know what I mean, get straight down to the action, like like when you're young, young, you know what I mean. So I guess you gotta build up the anticipation and make it fun, and but other than that, so. So basically you're saying you've just been burnt out and it's just not, you're not enjoying it.
Speaker 1:It's not you like you're not the problem. It's not that I'm not attracted to you. It's not that I don't love you. It's not that I don't want to be with you. I absolutely love you and want to be with you and attracted to you. I've just been feeling extremely burnt out. You, um, I've just been feeling extremely burnt out, but I feel like, at the end of the day, you know, obviously, if I want to be with you forever and I want us to work out and be happy, and if that's your way of being happy, I guess, I guess I have to prioritize that. You know, just like I prioritize anything else, I'm just gonna be, like, you know, put on my to-do list very, very enthusiastically just kidding guys, um, but yeah, that that's it.
Speaker 1:I feel like we both need to do our part. You need to take me out on dates more and I need to give it up more.
Speaker 2:That's it, that's all as simple as that yeah so it's really simple, it's just it's simple.
Speaker 1:We just don't take the time, because it's also easy. You know, you're like hey, like we're already together and yeah, they're not gonna worry about it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I feel like a lot of like, and that's that's the thing. It's not like if it gets boring, we're not like trying to jump ship and you know, look for the next person. We're just like all right, I'll see you on the other side of the house.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean yeah so it's like and that's why I feel like you know, I don't know if I can say the word like, I guess, like a very sexual person. So it's like, instead of like going out and exploring, you're just like I'm just going to go in the backyard and partake Burn one. You know, it's like, because I feel like there's some dudes that like they're just straight on the prowl. They're on, oh yeah, they're Gross Going by the mall or something. You know like on the prowl, like it's in Serengeti. You know what I mean. Yeah, the lion looking for the gazelle. But yeah, you know, when you're comfortable it can get a little boring, but that's also like a good sign of the relationship is healthy. It's just you're comfortable. You know what I mean. You kind of take your foot off the gas a little bit because obviously in the beginning it's like the honeymoon stage.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. You're all hot and caliente. Then it's like, once that comal gets cold, then it's like the gas stove. You're like, yeah, struggles to turn on, but once it turns, on, it's all good yeah, but then that it takes two to tango yep, other than that, loved putting myself out there but both of us, because they're like, damn, this was crazy yeah, um, but I mean, that's what it is you guys want to know about us, our business, and that's it.
Speaker 1:We've been on the struggle bus, but we're moving okay. We're human beings, we're human.
Speaker 2:I don't ask for much in this world, just a couple things.
Speaker 1:All right.
Speaker 2:But I'm not crazy, I'm just very. That's my language, that's my love language. So unfortunately she's like love language.
Speaker 1:So, unfortunately, she's like, yeah, unfortunately, unfortunately, sick, all right, well, we had so much fun. Whatever you have to say, put it in the comments we want to know we want to know um all right.
Speaker 2:Love you guys see you later you.