Comfort Zones & Carry-Ons

Online me and real-life me? Same energy. So when I say I’m outside to work, just know—it’s not for vibes, it’s for results.

What was supposed to be a clean solo trip to Minnesota for a live show and podcast collaboration turned into something completely different. This episode walks you through the uncomfortable side of building: miscommunication, shaky leadership, and that moment when you realize you’re the only one actually trying to execute. If you’ve ever stepped into a “business opportunity” that felt more like a performance than a plan, you’re going to feel this one.

I break down the real red flags in business collaborations—last-minute changes, vague direction, dodged questions, and conversations that sound good but go nowhere. This is a real talk on podcast production, event planning, content creation, and business etiquette—because clarity and consistency are not optional when time, money, and reputation are on the line.

I also keep it honest about the exact moment I knew the plan was done… and how pivoting into vlogging, content creation, and documenting the experience turned a potential loss into something valuable. Because sometimes the play isn’t to force the plan—it’s to adjust and still walk away with something.

And then—plot twist—the live show actually delivers. Real people. Real connection. Real execution. A reminder that even when leadership is off, the audience will show up if the energy is right.

I close this one out with a few non-negotiables I’m moving with:

• Stop confusing talkers with doers
• Build new plans when old ones fall apart
• Raise your standards—or remove yourself

If you’re a podcaster, entrepreneur, content creator, or event host, this episode is going to sharpen your instincts and save you from learning some lessons the hard way.

Tap in, subscribe, and share this with somebody who needs to tighten up their circle.

And when communication starts getting foggy… what’s your biggest red flag?

Transcript

Authenticity And The Mask Metaphor

Styles 0:00

Alright, before we get into it, let me say this real quick. Online me and real life me, we're the same person. There's no switch ups, no personality filter. What you see is what you get. Period. Done deal. I treat people how I want to be treated. I know how to talk to people and I know how to show up in rooms because you know that type of shit matters. Also, let's be clear, gaslighting is real, and I'm not the one. Watch this. Have you ever been invited to a party, but the person that invited you forgot to tell you that it was a masquerade ball? Like, the theme song of the party is Mask Off by Future. And what ends up happening is you're the only one in the room dressed for what's really going on. Because you showed up as your authentic self. When something's off, it's all the way off. Don't try to flip it like I'm the problem because I expect the clarity and consistency. That often happens. I'm not difficult. I'm direct. Alright, cool. Now that we got that established, let's go inside and talk about this trip for real. Welcome to Brunch Behavior, the Poor Report. I'm Styles, and today's poor, a first-class ticket to discomfort with a layer of growth, frustration, and a snowstorm of reality. Let me break this one down for you. The Sip Sermon. Before I get into this, let me preface this with the trip was March 13th of uh 2026. So you can, you know, set your clocks or build the time machine, go back in time, and then listen to this at that time. But anyway, that's when it happened. Alright, so boom. Thursday night, suitcases open, I'm packing, you know, checking and double checking everything equipment, socks, drawers, regular stuff, making sure I got everything I I needed before I head out. Friday at 3 p.m. I'm on a flight to Minnesota. I'ma keep it a bean. That moment was kind of bittersweet. Because while I'm boarding that flight, my wife was on the way back to Dallas. I just, well we just celebrated her birthday. Um, baby, I love you. If you know me, you know I wanted to be on that flight right next to her. In spite of whatever it is I was supposed to be doing. More on that later. And now that we got that out of the way, let's be clear. When I travel solo dolo, I'm outside to work. No nerves, I'm not hitting you with the hezy, no pump fakes, none of that. I'm in go mode, and I'm hoping everybody else is on timing. And to be honest, those are the expectations that I pulled up with. Because I was invited to a live show, shoutouts to Big Smash, I'll explain all this later in the Love Out Loud event. So in my mind, we were supposed to be building, recording, and locking in. At least that was the plan. So fast forward, because I tell the worst stories ever, I just do. A touchdown Friday evening already on go mode. I hit the rental spot and they got cars on top of cars on top of cars. Now for me, it's Friday and highly unusual that they have so many cars. Normally they're sold out. I can't get what I want. Matter of fact, I can't get what I need half the time. But anyway, I ended up pulling off the lot in the 740R big grill, lights glowing, you know, the regular shit. But it was the big boy shit, and I was feeling good about myself. I'm out of town, I'm in a luxury vehicle, I'm doing my big boy thing. That's what I was thinking. What I didn't know was that there was a blizzard on the way. Side note, you ever get upgraded in life and then immediately tested? Everything looks good, everything feels good, and then reality pulls up like, yo, you sure you ready for this? Huh? More on that later. I pulled up to the Airbnb. The Airbnb was penthouse action. I didn't know. I was just looking at the pictures. I didn't know it was actually on the top floor with a balcony on all that other good stuff. Right? The views were crazy, and I'm not gonna hold you, but Minnesota has a very beautiful skyline. At least where I was. Okay, so boom. Let's jump to Friday night dinner. Let me paint the picture. We hadn't spoken about the format of the show in forever. Uh the show's organizer just kept putting or changing notes. Like we had a um an Apple note that we all kept, or what have you, or or that we were tagged in rather, and then changes were made periodically. And when I say periodically, I'm lying, all the way up until the point where right before I hopped on a plane, there was a change to said format. So I'm going to dinner thinking that we're gonna actually sit down and have a conversation about this, right? Because of, you know, I want to talk about the structure, the execution, the intangibles, you know, all of this shit that you're supposed to talk about before we actually took, you know, hit the stage or what have you. Um none of that happened. That it that didn't happen. It was like I was an untrained dentist with a pair of pliers trying to pull teeth without having a patient scream. That's what that was. We talked about everything but business. Questions were getting deflected, there wasn't any clarity, and right then and there, I should have known. Trying to record anything meaningful podcast-wise, that shit was dead. Another side note. You ever sit in a conversation waiting for it to turn into something productive, and it just never gets there? That's when you realize you're in the wrong conversation. Because me, I thrive on organization, also thrive on communication, not small talk, and keep that shit to yourself. Now what you eating, not what you drinking, I want to talk about clarity, especially if we're supposed to be doing business. Fast forward to Saturday morning. Let's talk about it. I woke up with the full intentions on recording that morning with our gracious host and another podcaster that happened to be there. Instead, I'm watching a live about threesomes and police. Just to bring you up the speed for those who are not familiar with the situation, which a lot of my listeners probably aren't, but to bring you up the speed, the person on the live talking about the threesome and the police was the person that I was supposed to be recording with, which I didn't get to record with because somebody was trying to get ass at a quarter to eight in the morning. Uh, there's a lot to it. I think I expressed it on the live, so I'm gonna leave it there. I'm not gonna do this. Not only that, but this is long overdue. Uh, I've gotten a lot of requests to talk about the trip, so I'm talking about the trip. And after this, I'm gonna put this shit to bed. So back to the story. At that point, I was frustrated more than anything because nothing was aligning, and I really started questioning myself as to why I spent the money to come out here, not knowing that people's business acumen wasn't really what they said it was, no real structure, things were changing last minute, you know. Um, and there was even a point where this person was trying to appease me and give me a segment because I raised concerns over changes to the format that we went over the night before. And to be honest, it wasn't about the segment that was being given to me, it was about the level of thought behind decisions that were being made and then being changed the day of. That's like that shit wasn't cool. Anyway, let's keep it moving. It's Saturday, we're supposed to meet up at 4 p.m. for a 7 p.m. show. That was just for the setup. So let me say this plainly. I didn't pay money to come out there and set up, right? I'm not being paid as is. And if information was currency, I wasn't even getting paid in that either. I was asking direct questions and getting roundabout answers. If anything, in that moment, I was feeling like our input, and I'm not making it about me, but our input was being disregarded or met with rejection from the jump. So when the time came to head over to the venue, I think I got there like a little after 6. Actually, no, I got there before six. I was pregaming in the car, just trying to get my mind right, placing a few texts and calls into the venue to see where they are, where they were, rather, as far as the setup was concerned. Because for for what? What do you need me there that early for? Side note everybody wants to be seen, but not everybody wants to prepare. And that gap right there, well, that's where things start to fall apart. Fast forward to the show. Shoutouts to CL, shoutouts to the panel, and shoutouts to the crowd because there was love in that room. And I'm talking about real love. There was melanated excellence in every corner of that room. I ain't gonna hold you. And I'll say this too: I met some really amazing people in that space, and you already know I do not like people. Don't question me now, we'll talk about it later. There was genuine energy, genuine conversations, people you actually want to stay connected to. And even with the snow starting outside, because it did start to snow, people were still showing up, and that meant something. It actually meant a lot. Because in that moment, all the frustration that I had built up that day and the day before gone. Here's a quick disclaimer before we move on. This episode is not meant to offend anybody. It is, however, meant to bother anybody who thinks poor playing and foggy communication and winging it in public is somehow professional. It's not. This is not business, this is not proper business etiquette. That's not how disciplined people move. That's being consistently out of alignment with where you're supposed to be headed. And let me add this too: if somebody flies to your city, be a good host. That does not mean rolling out a red carpet or hiring a gospel choir. It means communicate, be clear, and don't have people out here guessing when they pulled up to build with you. Because poor communication usually is not random. Sometimes it's coming from somebody trying real hard to look like they belong in a room they haven't learned how to lead in yet. And when that pressure starts showing, here comes the gaslighting, the carantheatrics, and enough switch-ups to make you wonder which version of them clocked in that day. So if this section starts hitting a little close to home, don't get mad at me. Get a mirror, make accountability, your lover, and never cheat on her. Lesson number one just because things don't go as planned, doesn't mean your trip was a waste. Because in my case, even though I woke up to the most ridiculous fucking live I've ever seen in my life, on a day that I was supposed to be recording with people that flew in and the person that lived there, I pivoted. I mean, that day was one of the most adolescent things I've ever seen in my adult life on social media being put on by an adult. That's just facts. And I've already had this conversation uh since then a couple of times, and I was told to let it go, but I can't, because every time I I have to use the content some way, somehow. So here's the content. Getting back to it, back to the live that is. Listen, your business is your business, but in that moment, you weren't conducting business, and that's what had me tight, which isn't a slight to you, it was just more of a realization for me, right? See, I was realizing that words don't always match actions or meaning for that matter, and there's levels to this, which is why at that moment what I did was I didn't soak, I jumped out of the live, I wasn't watching that shit anymore. I jumped out of the live and I started to vlog. I picked up my camera, got the tripod, and got right to it. So even though I wasn't podding as I planned the pod, uh I was realizing that maybe it just wasn't meant for me to pod. And maybe it was meant for me just to document the trip in that way. So maybe that was God. There's a lot of maybes in there, right? Maybe that was God telling me Styles. Listen, this is what I need you to do for me. Go record everything, just not the audio. Get the visuals too, and that was the difference maker. I didn't shut down, I just pivoted. Lesson number two. Everybody is not on your level of execution, and that's not disrespect, that's reality. Some people talk it, some people plan it, and some people actually do it. You need to know the difference early. My level of discernment as it relates to this has been a little off lately, and um in that case it was way off. Lesson number three Clarity is not optional when business is involved. If communication is inconsistent, execution will be inconsistent as well, and that'll have you adjusting in real time when you should have been prepped in advance. Side note, confusion that'll cost you time, and time is the one thing you can't get back. So if it's not clear, it's already a problem. Here's a couple of examples. Example 1. Plans fall through, create new ones. Example 2. People aren't on your level of execution, move accordingly. Example 3. You're in a situation that doesn't match your standards, you elevate it or you detach from it. And let's be clear, hustling is not a word. It's discipline, it's consistency, and everybody's not built for that. Because sometimes you'll find yourself in rooms where everybody else is wearing a mask, playing the part, talking to talk, and you're the only one that actually showed up ready to do the work. And that's when you realize you weren't invited to collaborate, you were invited to observe, and those are two very different things. The final pull. Just me dealing with the consequences of not planning ahead. I ended up stepping out later, shoutouts to CL, got some food, reset a little bit, and then Monday. My journey started at 5 a.m. That's when I had to get to the airport. Flight cancel, then another, then another. Finally rerouted Minnesota to Kansas City, then back to New York. I landed in LaGuardia at 11:30 that night. Exhausted. But I'd do it again, different scenario, of course, because stepping outside of your comfort zone would expose everything. Your expectations, other people's limitations, and your ability to adapt. And sometimes it'll show you exactly who's behind the mask and who actually came ready to build. Sip happens. Every sip tells a story. That's your pour for today. Okay, shameless plug time. If you out here trying to grow, elevate, and move with intention, grab the free pour. Five drinks, five sermons, and a moment to breathe. And when you're ready to toast to real hustle, the kind that shows up even when things fall apart, sip the brunch behavior summer pack. The links in the description. Just another reminder that not everybody who says they hustle can actually execute. From your boy styles. Catch you on the next pour.