The Refreshingly Normal Podcast with Kēfla and Cree

New Year, Enhanced You

• Kefla and Crecia • Season 1 • Episode 24

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What if the new year didn’t demand a whole new you, just a clearer, kinder version of who you already are? We kick off 2026 by choosing “enhanced you,” and the conversation flows from real-life flu season tactics to identity-building habits and the courage to show love on purpose.

We start with a family check-in and practical health talk, why quarantining early, visiting urgent care, and considering a one-dose antiviral like Xofluza can shorten recovery and protect everyone at home. From there, we dive into the rhythm of school-year sickness and the boundaries that keep classrooms healthier, then pause for some honest HBCU accountability about student teaching placements. The thread that ties it all together: intention over inertia.

Goals take center stage with a different lens. We reframe resolutions into affirmations, learning a full guitar song, advancing a yoga certification, and experimenting with minimalism while making budgeting sustainable. There’s a 365-day running streak in the mix, proof that small daily reps stack into identity, plus plans to layer in strength training for a half-marathon and beyond. On the career front, we talk about removing the “A” from LAPC by stacking supervision hours, shadowing strong practices, and building toward a therapy practice that serves families, kids, and corporate wellness.

Mental health gets equal airtime. We explore meditation as prehab, not just a crisis tool, and share simple resets: silent drives, bedtime brain-dumps, and curating inputs to exude and attract positive energy. We also get candid about decluttering blocks, adult ADHD questions, and why insurance and dental costs complicate budgeting—because financial wellness is part of the wellness. The episode closes with an image you’ll remember: driving through heavy fog. You don’t wait for perfect visibility. You move forward, one careful step at a time.

If this conversation helps you choose intention, consistency, and kinder self-talk, share it with a friend, hit follow, and leave a review. Tell us: what are you reframing this year?

Send us your Questions or Comments and we’ll answer them on the show.

Don't forget to Like, Comment, Share, and Subscribe.

Thank you for listening!

SPEAKER_01

The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_06

Welcome back, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to the Refreshingly Normal Podcast. I am Keefla.

SPEAKER_08

I am Cree, your producer for the day.

SPEAKER_06

Thank y'all for tuning in, man. We appreciate you. Uh we are in the new year.

SPEAKER_08

New Year!

SPEAKER_06

2026.

SPEAKER_08

2026.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, what you gonna do? What you gonna do for the 2026?

SPEAKER_08

I don't know, but I'm gonna fix. Listen, if y'all like today, y'all know gunwell, she will not take over that.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_08

I'm the producer.

SPEAKER_06

And then I want you to be the editor.

SPEAKER_08

No, no.

SPEAKER_06

The distributor.

SPEAKER_08

No.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Do the whole thing. Set it up.

SPEAKER_08

Anywho. There are jobs, there are lots of jobs that for this whole little shebang. And so uh uh you have yours. And today, if we were running, if we were running uh whatever that thing's called at the end or beginning, credits, it would say produced by Luscious L. That's what it would say. Oh Lord, here she comes.

SPEAKER_06

Cinnabon's here, everybody. Cinnabon. You know the routine. Every time we start filming a podcast, she always comes. And look, she's ready to get this right up here. No.

SPEAKER_08

Get her a little blanket. Um just get it for it.

SPEAKER_06

All right, well, go ahead. Keep the party going.

Cinnabon’s Health Update

SPEAKER_08

All right, yes. Anyways, as in regards to Cinnabon, this is not a part of my produced show. So this is just an excerpt. Uh, y'all pray for Cinnabon. She has a heart murmur, and um, she had some symptoms with her congestive heart failure this past few days. So y'all just pray for little Cinnabon. She is 11, almost 12 years old. So um, yeah, she is she is um she is part of the sick and shut in. Yep. And so uh just put her on your prayer list at your church when they ask for the sick and shut in list. Please add Cinnabon Hair to the Sick and Shut in. She's on three medications right now. Yep. Um, so you know she is sick and she is shut in and she needs your prayers.

SPEAKER_06

And if she keeps going, she's gonna be shut out because we can't afford it.

SPEAKER_08

Oh no, we're not. Okay. That's not part of my producer show. That's his section of producing.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, am I lying though?

SPEAKER_08

I have empathy and compassion for all living things.

SPEAKER_06

We do. Look, I ain't gonna lie, but at the same time.

SPEAKER_08

Oh, right.

SPEAKER_06

We just can't afford it.

SPEAKER_08

It's a new year, new day.

SPEAKER_06

So if y'all want to shoot something that way, if y'all out there, you know some veterinarian care and free veterinarian care.

SPEAKER_08

Well, we also don't believe in holding on when letting them suffer. No, we're not gonna let um Cinnabon suffer either, just because we love her and would like for her to live forever. Right. So All dogs go to heaven, so we're not gonna allow her to suffer either.

SPEAKER_06

So she's saved.

SPEAKER_08

Right now, she is saved in the blood of Jesus.

SPEAKER_04

Yep.

SPEAKER_08

But right now, she's alright. She's better than what she was before we took her to the event. She's doing better with her meds. So, um, anyways, keep her in your prayers. All righty.

SPEAKER_06

All right, so it's it's uh, like I said, it's the new year, man. It's the last uh today is Saturday, so you know, tomorrow.

SPEAKER_08

First Saturday of the year.

Flu Season Tactics That Work

SPEAKER_06

First Saturday of the year, you know. Tomorrow will be the first Sunday of the year. And then we, you know, we right back at it again. You know, um, Tuesday we see them folks cheering. And y'all gonna send them back sick.

SPEAKER_08

Everybody's been so sick.

SPEAKER_06

Yep, everybody.

SPEAKER_08

I'm gonna advise y'all of this. Advise them. Remember when we said uh not Cinnabon was sick, I mean Gimani had the flu. Now, we saw him that Thursday evening. He kind of looked a little, hmm. And so we said, have you been taking your allergy medicine? You feel okay? He was like, I'm fine, I've been taking my medicine. And so the next morning he woke up and was like, he felt like crap. And I was like, take your behind to the urgent care. I said, because if it's the flu, then you can go ahead and get on top of it.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

And so the next morning, I made him an appointment for the urgent care. He went, it indeed was the flu. I was just saying that so he could maybe get Tamar flu if he had a flu, but there is a I don't know if it's new, but there is a one. What is it called? Zofla Zoflu Zoo Zofluakin.

SPEAKER_06

Zofluza or Zofinus? Zofluza or something like that.

SPEAKER_08

Zofluza. It's a one-dose medication that you can take for the flu. And it not only helps you to feel well immediately or really on that first on that very first time. It also helps you to be less contagious.

SPEAKER_06

That's right, which is important.

SPEAKER_08

Which means that with your family and friends and people you're around, you won't be giving it to everybody. That's right. And so Kimani was able to get that. And now I believe in a quarantine. You sick, you stand in your room, we'll bring you all your food, we'll do everything you need to do. But for those first few days, you just rest. Stay away from the general population. Stay away from everybody, um, so we can keep the whole house well. And so he was quarantined for a few days, and then once that medicine got in his system and he started to actually feel better, then we let him come on out. And I can say um that was a week ago. And we have all been fine.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but we've heard of people, you know, close to us and things like that who have been out and still been out. Like they was out when he got sick and they've been still sick.

SPEAKER_08

And they won't go to the urgent care or somewhere. They're just like, oh, it's the flu, it'll run as quickly as well. Or we'll just take some little medicine. Or we'll just take some medication. But I just feel like if it's something that can help knock it out faster for you. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00

And to prevent it from spreading.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, if it's the flu. Because heck, you know where we you, y'all know hey, what's going on? We don't know. Is it the flu? Is it uh who is the flu? I'm just saying, so just um, you know, not only we want you to be well, but we also want to keep other people yeah, protect other people. So, anywho, we did that and he is fine. And um, so just know if you're gonna get that Zoof, Zoefloza or whatever it is, because it not only helps you, but it helps everybody in your house.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, and it it has definitely like been a game changer. Like we we witnessed it with like just watching him. Cause I remember I went in the next day, and um I said, Kimoney, he turned around real quick. I said, Oh yeah, he's feeling much better. How you feel? And then probably like um, and that was probably because he took it that evening.

SPEAKER_08

Saturday.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, and then this was that morning. And so then probably like 24 hours that night, you know, he was singing and everything.

SPEAKER_08

Oh yeah, we heard the clarinet and singing, so we knew. Oh yeah, he's feeling good.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, he's feeling real good.

SPEAKER_08

So anywho, that is for y'all thinking new year because as we so fusa. As we keep going into the new year and people get back to their respective places and back to work.

Schools, Sick Waves, And Boundaries

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. It always happens for us with educators. You always have a wave whenever you come back from um, it it it's always that that for us, because our county has that fall break. So that's like the first part of sicknesses and stuff that people experience. And then we have another one when we come back from Thanksgiving, and the one from Christmas whoops, but like you come back in January, and like for example, we start school on Tuesday. That following week, like you'll start hearing Thursday and Friday, you start hearing the increase of coughs and all that stuff. But that following week, man, you're talking about four, five, six kids out of each class absent. You know, then you start seeing teachers absent or some of them not being absent because they I don't have any sick days, or they don't believe in taking sick days, and then they sick, and you know, we don't play that. Well, I don't play that. Like if you start coughing, I'm gonna give you that look.

SPEAKER_08

Like, oh yeah. I did that to a I did that to a young man when I was Christmas shopping in a shoe store, um, and he was helping me and he was just coughing. I said, Baby, are you sick? He said, Oh, you know, I'm all right. I said, Listen, I got somebody at home with the flu. I'm not trying to get sick. And so he said, Well, do you I said, So I'm fine. So he went on about his business and he asked somebody else to bag my stuff. I said, I'm sorry, I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but I'm not trying to be sick either. I said, So you take care of yourself. I said, because this flu is something else.

SPEAKER_06

It is. And that's all I heard. You know, every time you go somewhere, somebody coughing and hacking and all that. So I know it's gonna be bad when we get back to school, man.

SPEAKER_08

Well, you keep taking your vitamin C. You might need to get you some echinacea or something.

SPEAKER_06

I know I'm gonna take something. Yeah. Some prayer oil.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

That's what I need. Prayer oil, a little prayer cloth.

SPEAKER_08

So y'all put us on your prayer list as we go back out into the trenches with all the children.

SPEAKER_06

Yep, but it's time. We we're getting ready to get back, man. Jeez. I got one more. This is my last semester of classes, and then I start my internships and stuff. So that I'm happy about that.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

HBCU Frustrations And Accountability

SPEAKER_06

Happy about that. Kimoney's happy. This is his student teaching semester.

SPEAKER_08

He's gonna be two student teacher somewhere.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, somewhere. We ain't gonna talk about that. Anyhow. Bama State, we gotta do better. I'm I'm gonna talk about it. Bama State Education Department, we need to do better. You know, how is it that these kids have no clue where they're going to be placed for student teaching?

SPEAKER_08

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

Like, really.

SPEAKER_08

And what date to report?

SPEAKER_06

Yes. I mean, we've been doing this for years. We're Alabama Teachers College. That's what we were called. You know what I'm saying? So we were known for this. So it ain't like we we just started, you know, producing educators, you know, in the last two years. You know, this is something very important. And I'm not just saying because it's my son. You know, I just hate the fact that when we, you know, when you talk about HBCU, they're like, oh man, you know, you've been to HBCU. What you expect? Financial aid long line loan, what do you expect? The door, oh, that's HBCU. We gotta stop letting that be the excuse. At some point, we gotta like man up, woman up, and be like, you know what, we gotta take responsibility to do better. So whatever that looks like, I'm willing to work on a uh, you know, uh be sit on the round table with you and just give you my perspective, whatever it is. But we gotta, I love old mother dear, but we have to do better. And I'm sure I'm speaking for many people that went to HBCUs. It's so much stuff that y'all have given us. But when it comes to this, um inaccuracies and and you know, just not uh following through with what we need to follow through with, it's unacceptable. So sorry about that. I'll get off my my um thing, but it is what it is.

SPEAKER_08

And I'll get back to producing.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, go ahead and produce.

Enhanced You, Not New You

SPEAKER_08

All right. This episode is all about a new year, new year, boo. And I know a lot of people like to say new year, new me. I don't know. I'm okay with who I am.

SPEAKER_00

Me too.

Personal Goals: Guitar, Yoga, Minimalism

SPEAKER_08

I'm just gonna enhance. New year, enhance me. I like that. All right, all right. So here we go. The first thing is what is one thing that you have put on your new year thing that you are going to do, but you never are successful at completing it.

SPEAKER_06

It's a lot. I actually do have a lot.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

You know how my mind works.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

I want to learn a song on the guitar and actually play a full song.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Like, not know just Mary Hadley Lamb.

SPEAKER_08

I want to learn a full please, because we don't want to hear Mary Hadley Lamb.

SPEAKER_06

Full song.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Um, the other thing is I want to have made a substantial uh amount of progress in the yoga uh certification course.

SPEAKER_08

That you've had that more than just this year?

SPEAKER_06

Yes.

SPEAKER_08

Oh yes.

SPEAKER_06

Okay. Um and I want to learn how to live um not not fully, but I want to take on parts of the minimalist lifestyle.

SPEAKER_08

You've had you've had that more than just yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Oh wow. I've always wanted to kind of be there, but it just that's why it's a part of it's a part of me. Everywhere you see, you know. He's not a minimalist. Right. That's what I'm saying. So I wanna I wanna kinda get to that point where where things that I have I can get over to. I don't need this. I don't I I don't need this. And if I do need it, too bad. You know, right now it's not serving for me. And then when that that time comes, I'll get over that fact that I don't have it and move forward. But uh those are the I think those are the major things. Okay, everything else I think I'm pretty good at. Like, you know, I my fitness is is okay. I'm doing what I need to do with that. Um it's just the fact that those three things right there, I think would really um serve me well.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

What about yourself?

Organization And Budgeting That Stick

SPEAKER_08

So mine, I think it's like two things. I really want to be more organized. Like organized meaning like if you went to any of the closets in my home, you'll be like, oh wow, they are organized.

SPEAKER_11

Gotcha.

SPEAKER_08

Um, so I'm I I am great at getting things organized, but keeping them organized. So you know when you get busy in the hustle and bustle of life, and the one thing that was maybe organized, and you rush in to get things and doing things, and then you look up and then it kind of all goes downhill. So I would like to be more organized. Now I know I'm not a horribly organized, but in my mind, I have like a vision of how organized I would like to be. I don't even know if it's possible, but it is always something I want to do. Um, and then um I always want to do better with budgeting.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, that yeah, that too. That too.

SPEAKER_08

I want to do that. I'm not a good budgeter.

SPEAKER_06

I want to do that too.

SPEAKER_08

But I want to be better at budgeting. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I think my minimalist, that is part of it too, with me. Because I know when every time I think about it, it's like, yeah, once I'm a minimalist, because I don't feel like I need to have this, this, and this, that will help. And because when I feel like I need something, I feel like, well, I'm gonna go get it. But I think that would definitely help with me and my bugs.

Running Streaks, Strength, And Recovery

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, yeah. So I want to be a better budgeter. And so, you know, I think if it comes and goes, like I do really well, then yeah. So anywho, I want to be consistently great with uh with budgeting. I think those are like really my two because when it does come to fitness, I start the year off strong. If you look at like my uh fitness app thing, I always start off strong. Now this year, let me just say, yeah, I did really well this year because I have my overall goal of running every day at least a mile or more. I accomplished that task with like 747.34 miles this year. And I did that along still with some strength training.

SPEAKER_06

Um and it and when you think about it real quick, yeah, it didn't seem like a whole year. Like just think about it now. You know what I mean? Because we think the whole year is like gruesome.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah. And after, and it is really true. I don't, I think for me, I need longer than 21 days to kind of have that for that habit. I I really think they 21 days may be the average. Um, but for for me, I think it has like a two months for me is what I need to lock in. Um, and so then after that, it was just kind of like it felt weird not to.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

Um, and then once you get so close, once you reach the halfway mark, you just kind of like, I'd be a loser if I didn't, you know. Um, and so um, even when I was sick, I had COVID. Um, I had another little bug. Um, I still went down and did my one mile. This one would come and sit by me just to make sure I didn't fall out on the treadmill. Like it wasn't a fast mile.

SPEAKER_06

Because I knew I knew how important this was for you.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I wanted to see you accomplish this. Yeah. You know, um, because I know the the importance of milestones. And I know something like this is huge.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know, to be able to say you ran a mile. I I would love to hear the see the percentage of people who have ranks.

SPEAKER_11

Oh, yeah, consistently.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, because that is huge. And so I was like, you know, I I never did I say, You bet you don't need to run.

SPEAKER_08

No.

SPEAKER_06

I said, All right.

SPEAKER_08

He looked at me crazy.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I look at you crazy like, let's go, let's go do it though.

SPEAKER_08

Let's go. And one day, where did I go? Um, oh, I had to do a family or parent workshop on a Friday night, and it was like from six to seven, and I called him, I was like, okay, I'm on my way home. And he was like, Okay, we go. I said, Well, I still gotta do my run. You still gotta do your run. And so I was like, Yep, I still gotta do it. Um, but there are mornings where I got up to do it before. Um, if there was something happening that day, if we were flying out somewhere, I got up before our flight.

SPEAKER_06

Um miss never work out in the morning. Yeah, obviously, she made time for that.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, so I um, yeah, so I'm really proud of that. Through it all, I also did wash my diet um at the very start. Um in the holiday season, I did enjoy holiday season.

SPEAKER_06

I'm just I'm saying we did good diet-wise the whole year until November.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah. When the holiday kicked, we was like, Yeah, holiday season came in, I did, but I was still consistent with my exercise. So I didn't really have much of weight gain. But I also said why didn't he also have progress, you know, you know, progress either. But anywho, through it all from January 1 to now, I lost 25 pounds. So um I found it. But no, it was really um, yeah. I so now it feels weird not to run. So I still been running every day. Um, but this year I want, I'm wanting to um, I am still gonna run because my goal is to run half K marathon and maybe a full marathon. A half K? I mean, not a half K. A half marathon and a full marathon. That is really like one of my goal for this year, but I also want to um also increase um uh weight training. Um, because that in turn is gonna help me. With those long runs to be strong enough to make it through the whole run. So that's that's what I'm gonna do. You got it.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, so you said organize, and what was the other that what's so organize and budgeting. Budgeting, okay.

SPEAKER_08

Those are the things that um all right. So now we want to think about the things we want to do.

Reframing Resolutions Into Affirmations

SPEAKER_11

Okay.

SPEAKER_08

So think of your top three things that are your goals for the new year 2026. But instead of saying it like lose 20 pounds, you're going to change it into like a positive affirmation to make it more of something that sounds more pleasant, or encouraging, or affirming for you in that resolution. Okay, so so instead of me saying um So, like for instance, it says lose 20 pounds, but it said say your you would change it to stop hating myself in photos.

SPEAKER_06

Oh no, don't want me to do that.

SPEAKER_08

So what is the so I guess it's really around what is the reason?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I no, I understand. I understand exactly what it's saying.

SPEAKER_08

So then you can affirm it into what does it mean?

SPEAKER_06

Reframing the thought.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, reframing your thought.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, okay. So um so instead of saying, uh, let's see, let's see. So this year, okay. What do I want to do for this year? Um I'm going to I'm going to um put my talents on display. Um because I know I've been blessed in in a plethora of ways. You know, um, my students said, Coach Hare, you can do everything. You know, teach Dr. Harriet, what what have you not done? Um and I'm not afraid to do things. So, and I have I have talent, you know, to do a lot of things. And that's what the burning desire is for me. Um, so my goal, one of my major goals is to put my talents on display. I I believe that um I feel better when I am displaying my talents. You know, um I don't try to be a comedian. I think I'm blessed with a sense of humor and a way of seeing things and and a way of projecting things that may be humorous. Um and I'm gonna get back to that. You know, get back to that. So just put my talents on display. That's one. Uh how about you give one and I'll give my other one?

SPEAKER_08

Okay. I am going to enhance my future opportunities.

SPEAKER_03

Mm-hmm. Okay.

SPEAKER_06

What is a future opportunity that you have actually been like grinding on these last two days and uh starting to see a little progress and um put it, you put a mental blueprint together. And so share that with the people out there.

SPEAKER_08

All right. So right now I have my LA LA PC.

SPEAKER_06

And what does LAPC stand for?

Career Steps Toward Private Practice

SPEAKER_08

So I'm a licensed associate professional counselor. So professional counselor, but I have to work under the supervision of someone. Um, I I want to take the A out so that I don't have to do that. I can solely do what I want to do in regards to being a therapist, right? And so um I I have not been on that the way that I need to be on it because we do have goals that we've spoken about, and uh and a goal without action means nothing. Um, and so I um knowing that I was like, I've got to, I've got to do this work so that when Key is done with his um degree and all the things, then we are able to just move full force ahead to what our goal is, which is to own our own practice, um, also contracting out with corporations and doing wellness for corporations, helping families, children, adults therapeutically. Um, and so um I have filled out, um, been working with filling out applications for part-time LAPC positions so that I can get those hours faster, also finding um facilities or therapeutic offices that align with the goals and ideas that we have for our own practice so that I can learn and see how they handle business and what they do, so then I can take those things with me in the next, because our goal is in the next few years for that to happen. Um, and so um I've already taken steps to doing what I need to do so that I can enhance my future opportunities, meaning that us opening up our practice and being successful at that. So that is my goal for this year is to get those hours done so I can take the A out, and then I'm just ready to work on my own and do what I need to do.

Expressing Love As Daily Practice

SPEAKER_06

There you go. Enhancing yourself. All right, my second thing is um I want to I think I did a good job of this last year. Okay. Um continue to express love more. Um like even saying it. You know, I love you, love you guys, stuff like that, but really meaning it. Like um, and I know like my former players, they really felt I know my flag football girls did. Like they look at me like I'm their, you know, dad or whoever, you know, that that male figure, positive male figure in their life, because their parents come up to me too and say, You they really love you, coach, and you know, and they know I really love them. And I think we're in a time where people really don't hear that enough. Uh young men don't know how to express it enough because you know they call them a simp or whatever for doing that. Um and I so I think I really want to just continue to express love more in my actions as well as verbally. Um, uh, because I take the word love seriously. Like I don't I never try to throw it around. And I can give love without expecting it to be given back. You know? Um because I can't control when you feel it. But I do know I appreciate you. I I I can, you know, I've I've loved people that had probably never loved themselves. You know, I don't know what love is. It doesn't mean that I didn't love them, you know, for for how they were and who they were in my presence. So I want to I want to continue to do that because uh it makes me feel better. It really does. It it gives me that extra metal of purpose. Because I know I have a lot of purpose, but it's one of the things that I know I can wear with honor and say, you know, love, being a a spreader of love is my purpose. So Yep.

SPEAKER_08

All right, what's your I am going to be grateful for what I already have.

SPEAKER_06

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_08

Um, and so with that, I'm aligning that with budgeting. Um, and I'm aligning that with I have enough. Like, you know what I mean? I think we uh want a lot, but we don't always, you know, you don't necessarily need it. Um and so I guess that goal aligns also with minimalist things. Um so I am going to not that I'm not grateful now, but be more, I guess, intentional about practicing it, right? So like we say it, like we're grateful for all the things and grateful for your home and grateful for your bed and grateful for, you know, those things, but I guess be more intentional about really truly embracing it and your actions aligning with um truly being grateful for the life that you've been blessed with. Yeah. Right. So that yeah.

Gratitude, Intention, And “More”

SPEAKER_06

I think if we if if there was a word that I would like to use for the word intention, intentional or intention. You know, so uh, you know, we said it a few times last year, you know, to move with intention because um it's different when you actually do it with intention. And when someone understands the intention behind it, I think you there's a there's a there's okay, when you understand someone's intention, there's an alignment. You know what I mean? Because if you just do something to me or for me, why'd you do that? But if I understand your intention, even if it didn't serve me, like you give me$20, even if it didn't serve me, but you just said, look, I want to give what I can. You're like, nah, but I already got this, but I just I want to be a part of this. This is my intention. You know what I mean? Now I take it differently. Yes, now we are in alignment because we're moving in the same direction of the goal, the bigger goal. You know, even if I didn't need your help, but your intention, I needed the intention to know that we're stronger in numbers. You know, so I think that uh intention would be the year, I mean the word of the year. Um and then my last thing is to uh I'm um I'm making room for I don't want to necessarily say abundance, but I mean abundance looks different.

SPEAKER_08

We when we think of abundance, people think of that financially.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

But that's not what abundance is. Right.

SPEAKER_06

That's what I that's what I was trying to pull because I say more, but more is abundance. But, you know, and not you know, yes, blessings, but I want I'm I'm making room for it all. That means that means happiness. I'm making room for mistakes. Because if I'm making room for mistakes, that means I'm trying more. You see what I'm saying? Um because when you don't make room for your mistakes, a lot of times you don't take chances. So I'm I'm I'm I'm making room, I'm making room for abundance, and that is everything, you know, to kind of like like I said downstairs, uh get back to the point when I didn't, when I used to not live in fear, you know, um, but although we, yes, we do have more things to be fearful of as far as, you know, well not fearful, but more things to be unselfish of because I can't make selfish decisions now because I have a family. But if I do it with the mindset of knowing that it's gonna be okay, and your intentions, and my intentions, right, I can make those decisions and I can step out on faith and do those things that I want to do. So I definitely um want to make room for more. Yep. All right, go ahead. Your last one.

SPEAKER_08

Uh my last one is I want to exude and attract positive energy.

SPEAKER_06

All right.

SPEAKER_08

Um, and so to law of attraction. Yeah. So what that means for me is I want to um align myself with people that carry that energy that um I want to exude or give off. And then also be me being mindful of what energy am I giving off. And so that means being intentional about what I choose to share, what I choose to listen to, what I choose to um even absorb, right?

SPEAKER_11

Like makes sense.

SPEAKER_08

So um I'm gonna be that that's something that I want to do is to attract and to I guess I'm saying exude. Is that the word I want to say?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah. Like if somebody said, oh man, she just exudes positivity. Yeah, I mean it's the aura, your whole aura. You can see it.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, that I want I that is what I want to do for this. I mean, this year and beyond and beyond. Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_06

I most resolutions you would like for them to continue beyond the next year. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_08

You really want them to become a part of you.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Right? That is the goal.

SPEAKER_08

It's not just to be. And I and then I think when you are successful at it, like for me, I feel like, hey, I'm a runner. Like, I feel like that's just like now for me.

SPEAKER_06

That's a part of you. Yeah, yeah. It's a continuation. Yeah. Cause like you said, you know, when as a baby, you want to learn how to walk. Well, so okay, I learned how to walk this year, so it don't mean next year you stop.

SPEAKER_08

No, you get you can't do that. You continue on, right?

SPEAKER_06

You continue on and see what else it is you can do.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, so I I think, yeah, if you those things that, and even if you uh get off track, I I mean, thankfully I wasn't able, I didn't get off track with it, but you uh can readjust and get back to it. Because we're making room for mistakes, yeah. Get off track, nobody's perfect.

SPEAKER_06

Nope.

SPEAKER_08

Nobody's perfect, nope. Um, so anywho, those are our things. Any hootie dootie? Do you guys like the way that I am producing? It's pretty awesome, right?

SPEAKER_06

All right, leave a comment if you like her production.

SPEAKER_08

Listen, so good. All right. Now, our next one. I'm a great trainer.

Playful Resolutions For Each Other

unknown

Oh, child, please.

SPEAKER_08

All right, our next thing is this is for us to answer about one another.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_08

Um goodness gracious, that light, I can't even see my notes.

SPEAKER_06

Here, give it to me. I could I got my glasses.

SPEAKER_08

A resolution I secretly wish you would make.

SPEAKER_06

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_08

So if you had to think of a resolution that you wish oh am JJJ.

SPEAKER_05

Well, we we a day behind, child. We gotta catch up.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my god. Let me check out my days app. Is a resolution that you wish I would make. And what's a resolution I wish you would make?

SPEAKER_06

I think it's a lot easier than running, too. Oh you ran for 365 days. And some of those took a long time. 20 minutes, 30 minutes. Then you gotta think about getting dressed and waiting for your pre-workout to kick in. That's almost an hour.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

So what I, you know, what I'm proposing.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Hey, I mean, you know, I hey, but I'm in good shape. So 15 minutes, that includes the pre, the action. Hey, 365 days. You know what? I ain't even gonna say for the whole year. But you did say two months, start a good habit. So we can just knock out two two months, we might create a good habit. Y'all fill in the blanks.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my gosh. Wow.

SPEAKER_05

Hey, what you say? Come on, I'm I'm ready.

SPEAKER_08

My resolution that I wish that you would make is truly embrace the minimalist life.

SPEAKER_06

I want to.

SPEAKER_08

What's a word in between hoarder?

SPEAKER_06

A meatable meatableist. A meanableist.

SPEAKER_08

A meetableist. If you could just be a meeting mediumist, child, I take it.

SPEAKER_05

A barely a malicious.

SPEAKER_08

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

No, listen, listen, I'm gonna be honest with you.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Today. I got so um like anxiety kicked in looking at it.

SPEAKER_09

What?

SPEAKER_06

Everything. Yeah. Yeah. And then like sometime when I be like what you bringing about?

SPEAKER_08

Oh, I say that all the time.

SPEAKER_06

That's that's what it is. Because a lot of times it is.

SPEAKER_07

Because I box them up and then you just repound. Because I cleaned up that side.

SPEAKER_06

It is. It is. I just need I don't know. I don't know what it is. I don't know.

SPEAKER_08

I think what would what could maybe possibly be helpful is that before you stack it in a pile, say, Do I need this?

SPEAKER_06

I've been doing that. I actually like a lot of the piles are old stuff.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

But I really have been saying, just get rid of it. Get rid of it. You don't need it anymore. You know, like old, old uh USB cords and stuff. I got tons of them.

SPEAKER_08

Tons.

SPEAKER_06

You know what I'm saying? And and it just, I don't know.

SPEAKER_08

Old magazines.

Decluttering And Why It’s Hard

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. It's a lot of, it's a lot of those stuff that I can go in and just be like chunky. When I was in here meditating, and you know, I got my little book, this bookshelf right here. And certain things, and I was like, I don't need that, I don't need that. I was looking at, I don't need that, I don't need that. And I was like, so I had to turn and look at the uh lotus plant on the wall in order to meditate fully. That's just how it was getting me. Little stuff like that. And I keep saying I'm gonna do it, and I just gotta figure it out. And I and but I did say by the end of January, I would have done something.

SPEAKER_07

Mm-hmm. Whether that's I'll do it for if you want me to.

SPEAKER_06

I I I wouldn't mind. I honestly wouldn't mind. That's why you heard what I what did I say when I made a joke about something?

SPEAKER_08

Because I can get rid of something.

SPEAKER_06

You can. And sometimes I think it's better because I don't look at it and see what's being thrown away.

SPEAKER_08

And he don't, yeah, I've thrown away lots of things that he don't even know that's gone.

SPEAKER_06

I know they're gone, but I did I don't need it.

unknown

Yes.

SPEAKER_06

But then there's always something in me that says, I need it. You know what I mean? Because think about it. Like, whenever we need something, and you ask, I find it. I find something, or I, you know, it's like, oh, I can, wait a minute, but don't worry about it. I I something that, but it's I don't know. And I was trying to think about it. Uh I said, is there something deeper? Like, did I, did I not feel did I wanted to feel like I was the person people could count on? You know, the reason why I kept stuff.

SPEAKER_08

I think it's inherited.

SPEAKER_06

But that's what she is.

SPEAKER_08

From your mama.

SPEAKER_06

But that's what she is. Think about it.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

My mom wants to be, like Christmas. We didn't need her help. We told her, no, we doing it. Let us do it. Yeah. But what she kept doing.

SPEAKER_08

She tried to figure out a way to do it. Kept inserting herself.

SPEAKER_06

But that's her.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

That's my mom. My mom feels like she has to be the helper.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Has to be the person that's.

SPEAKER_08

But you know why I think your mama's that way?

SPEAKER_06

Wow.

SPEAKER_08

Um, because how she grew up was in a space. Where she wanted to seem helpful, probably so her step.

SPEAKER_06

But she was the oldest.

SPEAKER_08

She had to do a lot, but also to please a step parent who nothing you could probably do. Yeah, did that too.

SPEAKER_00

I believe that too.

SPEAKER_08

That wasn't, but she wanted to sing that she was doing and doing and doing. And she probably also was made to do and do and do. So then it's just a part of who she is.

SPEAKER_06

But also with her being the oldest, and I'm not the oldest, but I still believe this, feel this way, with a lot of things, is with the way certain things were with the stepparents and stuff like that. She felt like, if I do it, I know I'm gonna do it right.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And I'm gonna do it with the bright things.

SPEAKER_08

Yes, with my sisters and my mind.

SPEAKER_06

And that's how I feel a lot of times. If you let me do it, I'm gonna do it right. I'm gonna do it how it's supposed to be done. Um, you know, because that's I I have, you know, when I tell the boys this, anything you do, your name is tied to it. And I don't want to put the pressure on them, but you come from a good line of good people. And when they know that, they're expecting good stuff from you. So when you do it, you know, you gotta do it right. You know, and so I and I know like for me, this it's feel like some stuff, like, well, I can get rid of now. I might need this. I might need that, you know. And so, but I'm gonna, I don't know, I'm gonna figure it out. I've been praying for it. Trust me, I have been praying for it. And um, I'm go to I'm gonna go to therapy this year. Uh I'm gonna actually go to the psychologist first. Because that's what my old doctor, Dr. Nettie.

SPEAKER_08

Psychologist or psychiatrist.

Family Forecast: Confidence And Opportunity

SPEAKER_06

Psychiatrist, I'm sorry, psychiatrist. He told me to go. He said, because you never know, I might be adult uh onset ADHD. Or that you have been masking for so long. But now, every year you alive, those are extra problems that you know you can't mask after so long. You know, after so he said he's you stack books. You can hold three and four books, you can carry them around your whole life. So, but then when that pile gets so heavy and it starts wavering, you know, he says just like this, and all of a sudden you can't balance it. You know, and he says, So you gotta, you know, just just see if there's some other help that you may need. You know, and so I I'ma I'ma check that out.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

So cool. Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

Okay. Now.

SPEAKER_06

So that means, hey, I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna make make my end, be good on my end, you start on your end, and we all gonna be happy. And your end might help my end.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

If you start, that might help.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_06

Y'all heard her say yeah, and you saw her face. Yeah, so we might need to get started by 10 30.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_06

10 30.

SPEAKER_08

All right, on to the next.

SPEAKER_04

All right, producer.

SPEAKER_08

So we've talked about individually, like what we want to do. Okay, so let's forecast our family for this year.

SPEAKER_11

Okay.

SPEAKER_08

All right, so what do you think our family will look like? What things are gonna happen? What things do you think um will happen or come to fruition or opportunities or um for us as a family?

SPEAKER_06

As a family, I think we are in the year of unexpected blessings and not unexpected blessings out of tumultuous times. Like, oh my God, I need this. I didn't expect this blessing to come. No, I think it's doing the right things, walking the right uh way, and then out of nowhere, not needing it, but a blessing. Like, boom, here. What? Oh my God. You know, it's like winning a new car when you got a car. I think that we're gonna be receiving blessings like that. Uh, because I I think we are in our due season. Um I think confidence is definitely going to exude amongst everyone, especially the boys. Um because I remember at 22 was when 22 was when I'm when when my life shifted. That's when I got in trouble and then wound up going to Alabama State.

SPEAKER_07

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_06

And I it was an eye-opening experience for me at 22. And it it was like, it just made me realize my worth.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

What what I'm capable of doing and all that stuff.

SPEAKER_08

That's funny you say that, because for me at 22 is when I decided to move to um.

SPEAKER_09

Um was that Butler? Dallas. You went to Dallas at 22? I graduated when I was 21. So we met at when you was 23? When we met? Because you was in Dallas a year, right? I graduated. When you moved to Dallas?

Discipline, Consistency, And Readiness

SPEAKER_06

No, you moved to I moved to Dallas a year.

SPEAKER_08

I made the decision to move to Dallas.

SPEAKER_06

In 2000.

SPEAKER_08

No.

SPEAKER_06

Right? I thought you was there. No, no, no, no, no, no. Because you taught school, yeah. Yeah. We started at the school the same year. 2001.

SPEAKER_08

Yes. So 2001. So Oh no, I wasn't 22.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I'm about to say, child, you think you are? Wait a minute. Hold on. Yeah, because you're going to 77, so 07. I think so. No, no, I'm sorry, no seven.

SPEAKER_08

Um 97, I was 20.

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_08

No, I was 19. No.

SPEAKER_06

Child, okay. So I was 2001. 99. You was 24. You were 24. Oh, never mind. You was 24. You were 24. But twos is my part. That's that's how I know.

SPEAKER_08

22 is when I started teaching.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, 22 you started teaching.

SPEAKER_08

Yes.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

And then I taught for a year and a half because I graduated 2000. I mean 99. My teaching job 2000. And then I taught one more year a year, and then I moved to Dallas. Dallas in 2001. And 2001, I moved to Dallas.

SPEAKER_06

We started at Blair the same year.

SPEAKER_08

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_08

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_08

Yep.

SPEAKER_06

But I see I see abundance. I see the confidence reigning through our boys, like really realizing what they're capable of. You know, um, you know, still some powerful talks because you still, it's still scary when you make a a step. You know, because like Kimani's step would be at the graduation. Kahari's step should be, you know, to his next phase of his schooling, um, or tr or trade, you know, and um, and everything is a pivotable point. Um but it it was a revealing time. Um and I know everybody's timeline is different.

SPEAKER_08

Yep, their timelines are different. And your timeline is your timeline. It is, it is. That's so important.

SPEAKER_06

It is, but I feel like um I I just feel collectively, especially when they're in our house and and the and the like you said, the the the aura that we're gonna and the the blessing that we've prayed on this home, they can't help but to walk through it. You know what I mean? Because we prayed on it, and if they're still with us, they're walking in prayers every day. And them prayers are gonna wipe off on them, you know, and they're gonna feel it. And I think they're gonna, this is gonna be a time of uh confidence. It's gonna be their coming of age. You know. I I believe so. Yeah, I believe so. What about you?

SPEAKER_08

Um, I do think this will be a year of opportunity, but I think it's also going to be a year of us understanding the importance of discipline and consistency um for opportunities to arise. Because opportunities aren't going to magically land in your lap. Um that there's work that you have to do behind it. Um, and so I think it's going to be your locking in. Yeah. Right? So locking in to be prepared and ready for your opportunity. That's what I'm about to say. And to be ready for your blessings.

SPEAKER_10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

Um, and to be ready for those things that are to come, um, that's what I feel like that we are going to understand the that part, the the work and consistency and discipline that is needed to show that you're ready for your opportunity.

SPEAKER_06

Because that's what I'm about to say. Because the opportunity can fall in your lap. Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

But if you're ready.

Mental Health: Meditate And Decompress

SPEAKER_06

If you're not prepared, that opportunity would be wasted. But if you're prepared and that bad boy come in your lap, shh. You're ready to do some finds. Do some things. Do some things.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

That's right.

SPEAKER_08

So that's what I believe.

SPEAKER_06

All right, then Shaka.

SPEAKER_08

Shaka.

SPEAKER_06

Some tenderness. What did uh Miss uh Miss Uh?

SPEAKER_08

Y'all saw Miss Data. When she had a, I think it was supposed to be a rib or something. She came to herself trying to pull the meat on my phone. Tender nizzle. She tore that, she had to tear the meat on my time. Ooh, this little tick. Somebody said um um tougherism. Comments. That beat was so tough. She tried to, she had to pull it on a sound like veil.

SPEAKER_04

She's like Velcro. Oh, tenderness.

SPEAKER_08

All right, um, all right. So then thinking of as we go into this year, now we've talked about our our uh resolutions goals, what we want to see, what we're gonna do, what we see for our family. Um, but we also know through anything in life, I always say this in my trainings, that life is not always Skittles, rainbows, and unicorns. All right, then life gets challenging. So, what will you do as a mental reset or what will you do to support your mental health as you are working towards um these goals or resolutions that you have set for yourself for your new year enhanced you? So, what are you gonna do so that you can protect your mental, but also what will you do to reset your mental when life gets challenging?

SPEAKER_06

Um, well, you know, my you know, uh meditation. I'm gonna dig deeper into it. Meditate, um not necessarily with the intention of calming the now, but with the intention of prepping for what is to come. You know, because a lot of times people, you know, you straight, look, you need to go sit down and meditate. You know, but I want to be able to meditate so much that as soon as I feel the thermostat, my internal thermostat rising one degree that I'm able to calm my myself and my thoughts so that it it immediately drops. You know, so that's what the just really paying attention to myself, my thoughts, my feelings. So that even going into a situation knowing like, okay, you know, this may be a tough situation you're about to go into, let's go ahead and do what you gotta do so that when it happens, you it they won't even know that you were rattled. You know what I mean? And I'm pretty good at handling tough stuff, staying calm, but I want to be able to handle it internally because I can I can put on a great face, but it doesn't mean that it don't affect me on the inside.

SPEAKER_08

That's what I was gonna say.

SPEAKER_06

Right. So, but now I want to make sure that the face represents the inside and it stays at a calm and a peaceful thing. I mean, your phrase of the year last year was protect what?

SPEAKER_08

My peace.

SPEAKER_06

Right. And so I want to make sure I'm truly protecting my peace. You know what I mean? Um so I guess that's mine.

SPEAKER_08

I think for me it is going to be, and I've been trying to do this, I can be an overthinker without a doubt. And I can my mind, I probably should, I definitely should be write something. Because I can think about something and then I can take it to this whole other like level that it's like, hold up, wait a minute, girl. Um, and so I think I've at the end of the year I begin to stop, rationalize, really think through and bring it down. Like I've done that in my mind. Um maybe running has kind of helped me to do that because that's a lot of times just to be in your thoughts when you're in your thoughts.

SPEAKER_06

In your thoughts when you're running, yeah.

SPEAKER_08

I've also done a lot of like sometimes I'll drive home with nothing on, um, just to kind of, you know, decompress. Um, but I think that is what I'm gonna do for mental reset. I'm also in line with that, I do put on a brave face a lot. Um so I think I'm not gonna just keep if it's something that I feel like is kind of finding a way to release it to somebody.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, that's what I was about to say. I was saying it right now when you were thinking it.

SPEAKER_08

But the thing for me is I also have like a little bit of trust things. And I do have long-term friends that I've had, um, but I've always been very like um leery about sharing particular things or I don't know. I'm I I I you I just have always had trouble with the intentions of others. So um, and then I don't also want, don't don't want to also like this one, like sometimes we're gonna be like, well, he got his own things going on. So I don't want to put pile my stuff. And so just trying to figure out what does that look like for me, where is the safe space to be able to? Because even if you are thinking it, and it's something that's in your brain, and if you don't find a way to release it, it does impact my sleep, my lots of like tons of things. And so trying to figure out what does that look like for me. So the rationalizing and really taking the time, sit through, think through, like taking the time, and then um not overanalyzing, like sometimes it's like, but it's not even that. Wait, wait, why why why did you go there? Um, so completely have recognized that in myself at the old age of 48. Meditate. Maybe that's what I'll try to do. I've tried meditation.

SPEAKER_06

Meditate, and you need to have, I don't want to say sticky note, I want to say nice, um, thick, papyrus kind of paper.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And write down what you are thinking before you go to bed. Like that thing, like this is the finances. Write it down. Finances, you know, ball it up, throw it in the trash, lay your head down.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah, maybe.

SPEAKER_06

But don't, but I'm saying, like, if that's the do it before you put your phone. Because you know you sometimes you get in the in the phone. Oh, I'm gonna be working on that though. Yeah. Because if you throw it down and look at the phone, then you may see something. Something may remind you of it. Yeah. Like, oh my God, this house reminds you of your problems. I wanted, I wanted our freaking 20-foot wall to look accented.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know, we can't right now because we're saving up for, you know, knew this, knew that.

SPEAKER_08

Uh-huh. So, but it has to be something that you can so that some sort of what would what would that release look like for me where I could release it but still feel safe in that release.

SPEAKER_06

I'm telling you, meditation is is my savior.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

It is my savior. It has helped me during COVID.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

When I was about to lose it in that room, thinking that like scared that I was gonna die.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Um, helping me with the dissertation, making me um gather the the confidence to continue to write. Um helped me when I feel like I'm not being the the head of the household, like I'm not doing what I should do. Um it is, it is my saving grace. You know what I'm saying? And we talked about it not being right. You know, I just I just sit, just sit in it, sit in it all and just breathe. And every time your thoughts wander, acknowledge your thoughts are wondering and just breathe. Count your breasts, whatever it is. Maybe I'll practice a little bit with you tomorrow and get you an idea of it. And uh, but it it is I have tried meditation.

Coaching Seasons And What’s Next

SPEAKER_08

I just one thing that I've also known, and I try to tell this to our son, I think we rubbed off on him a bit, Kimani, with the perfectionist in him, is that I am that way. I am very competitive. If I try something, if I do something, I don't care if it's the first time, I really want to be the best. And then the idea of that is like ludicrous, like it's dumb that if you are just the first time doing something, that you aren't going to be the best, and you don't have to be the best.

SPEAKER_06

Well, that's what you told me about the podcast, isn't that?

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, I did. And so, um, so so even through meditation, the idea of that I'm gonna do it and it's just gonna be perfect. It's gonna be like what you see, people meditating, like, no, it's not gonna be that. And so um, you just, you know, keep doing until it's it's what where you want it to be. And that could be 30 times, 40, 50 times before it it is, but um It's just so peaceful. It's about the consistency and discipline of continuing to do it until it gives you what you need.

SPEAKER_06

I think that's what this episode is about. It really is about consistency and discipline. Yeah. Everything we're talking about is being consistent, you know, and creating new habits, breaking the old habits. It's being consistent with them and being disciplined enough to know that even if I fail, uh just continue. Be disciplined to keep keep trying. Keep be disciplined also to not be um be your own worst critic and worst enemy, which we are often. Yes, we are. Which doesn't make it right. No. You know what I mean? Like we'll give we'll give everybody else the the love that they deserve. And the encouragement they deserve, but then for ourselves. We're like, oh, you know what? You might as well quit. You ain't gonna do it right. I never tell that to nobody else.

SPEAKER_08

No, that's why I love like that when we said the resolutions, like reframing it into the positivity that come of that comes out of it. Because sometimes the way that we reframe it, it sounds like, oh, it's on it's like a like you know how they talk about the backpack and you put the bricks in it and it just feels heavy and overwhelming. And oftentimes when we think of people coming up with their goals for the year, it's like another brick in your backpack. And it just feels heavy.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

But the idea of thinking about it in that reaffirming way, reframing it, then it it makes it lighter.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah. Cause I I definitely know like when we used to make the resolutions, like, you know, like I mean, of course I made resolutions this year, like this is gonna be my transfiguration um, you know, of of a lot of things in my life, you know, especially the my physical, because you know, I've been in different ailments in my body. Just being a a young kid, a go get a man, playing hard and doing crazy stuff, has has gotten to me, you know, my aches and pains. And I feel like carrying the weight that I've been carrying, even though, you know, some of it's m majority of it's muscle, I will say. Thank God. But it's it's heavy. You know what I'm saying? And I'm aching. And so I need to get back, or I need to change it, you know, and just knock some of it off. But I'm like, dang, that means it's gonna be this. I gotta do this part, this part, this part.

SPEAKER_08

But I was like, When I hear you talk, it's overwhelming.

SPEAKER_06

But but but then this is what I said. I said, you like that. I said, you like going to the gym, you like trying different workouts, you like cooking. So what's the pro I says why and I had to really think, I said, why am I why is it so daunting?

Insurance Side Eye And Costs

SPEAKER_08

It's you know, and I think Well, I like working out and doing those things too, because I definitely feel good after it's just, you know, um, but I do, if I'm at work and I think about, oh, I still because it's still a it's still something I like, but it's still a task. It's still a task. And I do like, you know, that anxious feeling that gets in you. I'm like, I still gotta go. And so, you know, it's just another task.

SPEAKER_06

But we do task every day. We do. So why not make sure that a task that you're doing out of the day is something beneficial to you.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah. It's just reframing it. Like you said, like when you say, when I say, Oh, I gotta go to work tomorrow. I said, Nope, you get to go. Right. There's lots of people that wish they could get to go and do the job that you do. So the idea of like, um, and Kirsten said it too, she's a runner on uh Peloton instructor. She was like, You had you saying, I get to run, I love to run. And so just knowing that you say, you know, I get to go to the gym, I love going to the gym. That just kind of reframing it in that way.

SPEAKER_06

So that's what it kind of made me excited about it. And, you know, and to know that it can be done and it will be done, and just how better I'm gonna feel. After. Yes. Yes, how because I was I was probably more consistent in my workouts after baseball season last year than I was in a long time because a lot of that peace was there. Because I wasn't coaching in the fall. That was the first time I haven't coached since when I did the middle school when we first moved to Cobb County, I wasn't coaching. Right? Um, that was the only break I had not coaching since we've been in Georgia in 2006. I've coached every year, twice a year. Because I've in middle school, I I did the middle school football and I did high school baseball every freaking year. But in 2013, 2014 was the only time I didn't coach. And but I was doing, you know, trying to do the dissertation where mental froze. And then this time, my schoolwork was my master's work, but it wasn't as daunting to me as dissertation. And so I had the peace to actually do my workouts. I felt good. Yeah, so I'm just saying now I feel so much better, you know, about going into this resolution of changing my body. And I know it's gonna be crazy.

SPEAKER_08

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

So it's gonna also help with your resolution.

SPEAKER_08

Oh, I'm a ji.

SPEAKER_06

Your res, yeah, it's gonna be some G G G G.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my gosh. Guys, all right, as the producer of the show, as the producer of your show today, we are gonna wrap this thing up.

SPEAKER_00

All right, so in wrapping it up, New Year.

SPEAKER_08

Enhance.

SPEAKER_04

Say it.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I was oh, I was like saying I don't need no enhancements for the thing.

SPEAKER_04

We still get a little bit.

SPEAKER_08

That's not what I was saying. So, closing out.

SPEAKER_06

What are we looking forward to? You was about to say that, producer?

SPEAKER_07

Can I say I can still can't say that side eye producer?

SPEAKER_06

Come on, producer. No, I got still got a side eye. What's your side eye?

SPEAKER_08

I'm not sure if I have a side eye. I'm telling y'all, I have not been out of this house all week.

SPEAKER_04

My side eye is benefits, insurance.

SPEAKER_06

Oh gosh. Because my sister-in-law, I just got my meta glasses and my prescription is like almost$400 because I'm blind. I got astigmatism, so I got progressive lenses, meaning that when I look like this, I can see far, here I can see the computer, here I could read, you know, and then metaglasses. Did I need metaglasses? No, I didn't. I didn't, I really didn't. But it's part of the plan of being able to produce more content and post more content in 2026 to be consistent. That's what we're trying to do. We're building a brand here, ladies and gentlemen. And um, so my glasses were like with a discount. First of all, I had to I did the this lady was amazing. She gave me a discount because I already used my benefits for some contacts that were after the discount were$370-something dollars for six-month supply for contacts. So I went to the optometrist and she gave me a discount that she found, which was cheaper than what my insurance would have been. But the glasses still cost me like$500. My sister-in-law called me, said, How do you like your glasses? I'm trying to use my benefits at the beginning of the year, yada, yada, yada. Boom, she calls me back. I got the glasses. How much were yours? Oh, I wind up paying everything, you know, the lenses and all. She got progressive, all that kind of stuff, lenses. And transition lenses would go from shades to, I mean, from clear lenses to shades. Everything like that for$250. Gen 2, meta, glasses, the Ray Band, the ones with kind of almost like the cat eye style.$200 something dollars.

SPEAKER_08

She works for the federal government.

SPEAKER_06

But I'm just saying, our insurance. Oh my God. Then I gotta go to the dentist pretty soon. And we know the dentist.

SPEAKER_08

Oh, the dentist! This is gonna be a whole nother episode. We may even talk about that next time. How awful the dental insurance is.

SPEAKER_06

And now I see why people walk around with no teeth at all.

SPEAKER_08

And like teeth just all or why they go to other countries to get dental work done.

SPEAKER_06

Teeth be putting up the West side and all that.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, I know why they do it, because it's expensive.

SPEAKER_06

It is. It really is. Yes. And so it's like that's my side of like thousands of dollars. We're paying all this money for insurance that is crazy. And medical insurance and all this, like, because I I have some.

SPEAKER_08

Because almost it was like, why did you even need uh eye insurance?

SPEAKER_06

Right. If the lady from she said, oh, there's a discount because you have an insurance, they're offering a discount.

Courtesy, Hearing Aids, And Humor

SPEAKER_04

I was like, so do they do this all the time?

SPEAKER_08

If you didn't have insurance, you wouldn't got your discount.

SPEAKER_06

But still, there's been times where we always had to wait because of whatever reason. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Because like now, okay, let's say if I need contacts and I only got six months, so that means I could have got contacts again based off of the discount.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah, you can still go.

SPEAKER_06

And I could have got glasses off the discount.

SPEAKER_11

Yeah. And then use my insurance. Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_06

You know, so it's so crazy, like it's stuff that is out there. But, you know, I digress because I'm blessed to have insurance because some people gotta pay fully out of pocket. But it's still a side eye.

SPEAKER_11

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

Still a side eye. But I'm glad I got my glasses because I can actually see at night. Like we drove to Kansas, child, we got there off the way to the prayer.

SPEAKER_08

Oh, that's crazy because we did offer to drive.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but I know if I can't see and y'all don't be paying attention, shh, I'd rather that. I'd rather I'd rather me seeing uh two one car turn into two, then y'all see one car and act like ain't no car on the road.

SPEAKER_08

Thank you, the Lord and Savior, Jesus.

SPEAKER_06

Well, that's my side eye. What's your side eye?

SPEAKER_08

All the way to cancel.

SPEAKER_06

What's your side eye?

SPEAKER_08

I really do not have a side eye. Okay. Um, to be quite honest, I'm side. I don't have a side eye. If I had to just come up with something, I might say, um, for instance, we went today to get Kimani a new black suit. And as we were walking out, the we um the DXL store, they are the sweetest little people in there all the time. Good folks. Um, anywho, we were walking out, and there was a lady walking in, and the young lady that works at works at DXL was like, hi, welcome to DXL. How you doing? And the lady just walks in and didn't say anything. So I thought I said, I guess she, I guess you weren't talking to her. She goes, Oh, don't worry about it. I'm used to it. But my side eye is just common courtesy. If you walk into a store and people say hi, even if they walk, you go to Mo's. Welcome to Mo's. We still say hey. Yeah, we say hey. Like I mean, like, even that, like, there, I mean, I know they probably have to do that as a part of their job, but it feels better for them to do that if people actually respond to that.

SPEAKER_06

Maybe she can hear. Maybe she likes my daddy, and my daddy goes ahead and hearing.

SPEAKER_08

Can't hear a thing. You'd be like, didn't he like and then it you just get, it's like, it's almost like we speak in a different language to them. You know how when someone is talking to you with a heavy accent and you're trying to understand them, and you you say, huh? Say that again. Like that's how he lives. Huh?

unknown

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_08

When all you gotta do, put in your doggone. Put in your um hearing a, and you can quit saying, huh.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, he means.

SPEAKER_08

You should get him a shirt made to say hum.

SPEAKER_06

Every third word.

SPEAKER_08

With a question mark.

unknown

Huh?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, every third word. What is that?

SPEAKER_08

What is that? When we say that again? Say that with my name.

SPEAKER_06

Y'all say what now? We already said it, we already said it.

SPEAKER_08

We ain't said it again. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, okay. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_08

So maybe that's my side eye. This is my father-in-law. Put in your dog gone heritage.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, okay. All right. Um what does DXL stand for? Dues extra large or dingalings extra long.

SPEAKER_08

Uh, it don't got nothing to do with dangerlines. But what does it mean? Dudes extra large. Maybe. It might be. Them boys extra large.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. They clothes be sharp though.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

Closing Encouragement: Move Through The Fog

SPEAKER_06

When I was growing up and I was going through my big phase, I had to cut off pants. So I I got mad. Remember what granna said? Do you remember what granna said? I had to ask that later.

SPEAKER_08

Well, take me to the store where they make clothes for midgets then. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Because I couldn't find it, because I was short, but I was real big. I got I gained a lot of weight, guys. And uh we'll talk about that later. But I had to cut off my pants. And back then, that's when, you know, pants was like when Oak Tree and uh everybody was doing a uh Roger Rabbit and the every little step. I remember all the pleats used to have in the pants. So by the time I cut them off, the pleats was all the pleats, no, the pleats were all the way to the cuff.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

As opposed to the pleats being here and then the cuff, you know, extended. No, I had like three pleats down on my shin. I looked a mess. And then I didn't like my pants under my belly, so I would pull them up over my, kind of like over my belly, and I would always pull them up like this, my arm like this.

SPEAKER_05

So I'd be somewhere, I'd be just talking like that. Because I ain't want to do it like this. I'll go. And it was a habit I didn't realize. It was like, stop doing that. In my days, man, that might be why I like to be in shape all the time. At least try to get right.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_05

All right, so what are you looking forward to?

SPEAKER_08

Well, there's one thing I'm looking forward to, but I can't share because it's a secret.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_08

Uh but so I don't know.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah, I can't share that.

SPEAKER_06

I can't share that till Well, I got a secret, and I'm looking forward to it, but I don't know if we'll be able to do it, but I'm gonna try to make it happen.

SPEAKER_07

You got a secret?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. But I'm gonna try to make it happen. Um, but I'm looking forward to um this semester for school, you know, for uh for uh I I got a great group of kids. You know, my flag football girls like a lot of seniors, and they're graduating. Um hate to see them go.

SPEAKER_08

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

But I'm I'm excited to see.

SPEAKER_08

Is Mississippi graduating?

SPEAKER_06

No, Mississippi got one more year.

SPEAKER_08

What about um a baby? Um Khalia got a year after.

SPEAKER_06

Khalia got another year. Yeah, I think.

SPEAKER_08

No, Khalia's 11th grade. 11th grade? I think Khalia is 11th grade.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, she is, yeah, 11th grade. Yeah, yeah. I think.

SPEAKER_08

I think she might just be 10th grade. Okay. Oh, I don't think so. I feel like I feel like I've been with seeing Khalia two years now.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah. So yeah, she might be 11th grade. Yeah, so Khalia got another year too. But um, Janaya got one more year too. And um, but my rest of my girls, they they're about to be up out of there. Yep. So uh I'm looking forward just to see good things for them. Um because Zoe, the one that I escorted, you know, she's now starting to catch ground to figure out, okay, going to school, what's she gonna do? Um and but okay, I'm not looking forward to. I'm not just saying though. I'm in geometry. And that's the math that kind of got me.

SPEAKER_08

It got me too.

SPEAKER_06

You know, because memorizing all the formulas. But once I you know, once I write the formulas down and know which ones to use where, I'm great at the appraisal.

SPEAKER_08

Think about your the technology you have now compared to what we were doing.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, I know, but but it's just you you know me. Yeah. I want to be, you know, so it's a little nervous about that. But the teacher's great.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I like I like my teacher that I'm working with.

SPEAKER_08

And um geometry was my arch nemesis. I had to focus so much on that that I didn't focus on accounting, didn't pass accountant, got kicked off the ch uh cheerleading.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, no. Geometry was the first C I made in high school. Yeah. Yeah. And uh I didn't make many C's in high school. It's one of the first C. Yeah, first Cs I made in high school. You know, Calvin.

SPEAKER_08

You made a C in geometry.

SPEAKER_06

Calvin wasn't playing that. Like, literally, I was already strict, had to be home 9:30.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And so, but yeah. But anyway, um, that's it.

SPEAKER_08

Cool in the gang. Um, I was trying to think of one thing I would am looking forward to. And dang it, I lost it.

SPEAKER_07

Damn, I'm old.

SPEAKER_08

You should be looking forward to some of these little interviews you got. Yeah, that's what I was getting ready to say. See how I am. Yeah, Monday, Monday, I'm going to be meeting with um a uh, I don't know, counseling office, counseling therapeutic.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, uh-huh.

SPEAKER_08

Whatever.

SPEAKER_00

Counseling the therapy, therapy, therapeutic practice.

SPEAKER_08

Yes, I'm meeting on Monday with uh with someone. Um, so hopefully get this ball rolling.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

We got a lot to look forward to.

SPEAKER_08

See, see, senor.

SPEAKER_06

This is a great year.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my god. Just got to start out.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

unknown

All right.

SPEAKER_08

What do you want to do?

SPEAKER_06

Her fast.

SPEAKER_08

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_06

I'm looking forward to making sure she don't die.

SPEAKER_08

Don't die, Deja. Trying to do a 21-day fast. Um, what is something that for as our listeners think about their year? Um, what is encouragement or words of wisdom you have for them?

SPEAKER_06

All right. So as you look forward to your year, here we go. Think about this. Think about all the times when you say, Oh my God, I can't do this. This is this is difficult. This is, I can't believe this is happening. All that stuff. Think about it. Now, if you have to think about it, that means it has happened already. You got through it. So the same thing should apply to now. Understand that if you keep putting one foot in front of the other, you'll move through it. That's just how it is. You got to put one foot in front of the other. Yes, it may be dark, it may be dim. It's like driving on a on a highway with fog, you know, extreme fog. You keep pushing forward because you know that the road is laid out in front of you. You know, you don't just stop and wait and for the fog, wait for the fog to clear. No, because you have a destination to get to. Say it. So if you keep driving, keep moving forward, keep putting one foot before the other. Stay positive because throughout the day, time is gonna tick. Do you want to spend your time feeling sorry, feeling mad, feeling angry, or do you want to spend your time feeling grateful, blessed, and thankful? Because if you're a warrior, you're gonna keep moving forward. So let's keep moving forward with a positive attitude.

SPEAKER_08

Don't get stuck in the fog. Believe it, sister.

SPEAKER_04

Believe it, sister. And brothers. That's right. You got this. Believe it, suster, so bristles. Stop it. It's some bristles out there. It is some bristles. It's some bristles out there.

SPEAKER_08

So you have got this. Don't get stuck in the fog. Keep trucking along. That's right.

SPEAKER_04

Because you know, there's a perfect example.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

If y'all go back and look at Shamar when Shamar was asking for y'all to pay for his telephone bill, to now running on running out on stage, getting out of uh out of uh Uber Black, you know, going to the next step with his sunglasses on. And people talking about, I love you. I love you, Shamar. Right, and Shamar was asking for phone bill money.

SPEAKER_04

Yes. Come on now.

SPEAKER_06

And Shamar tells you, Shamar would have been on my caseload.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Shamar would have been on my caseload.

SPEAKER_08

But guess what?

SPEAKER_06

He out there doing it, living his best life.

SPEAKER_08

Through the fog.

SPEAKER_06

Through the fog. He kept going through the fog.

SPEAKER_08

Say it.

SPEAKER_06

He didn't know where the road was going.

SPEAKER_04

And what would he say about that? He would have said, look, I just gonna keep going because I know that with the way Donald Trump.

SPEAKER_06

It's cheese and I go I got dreams and aspirinations. I gonna make it through.

SPEAKER_04

All right, and I said what I said. Okay. We'll see. We'll see. We'll see.

Wrap Up And Listener Feedback

SPEAKER_08

And with that, we are out of here. Out of here.

SPEAKER_06

This is the Refreshingly Normal Podcast. I am Keefla.

SPEAKER_08

And I am today's producer of Refreshingly Normal Podcast, Lucretia. Tell me what you thought. Was this the best one yet?

SPEAKER_06

Hey, y'all can say yes all you want to. That means she got to do it more often. Oh, I know. What did I do?

SPEAKER_08

So uh sign up for a job.

SPEAKER_06

That's right. Do your job. You sign up for another job. Y'all heard them. We gotta get started. Oh my god. Clark here in about probably about 37 minutes. Oh my gosh. So we good. That's good for lunch.

SPEAKER_08

Thanks guys for listening. Love ya. Yeah. Love ya.

SPEAKER_06

Bye. Peace. Good job, producer.

SPEAKER_08

You welcome y'all.