The Refreshingly Normal Podcast with Kēfla and Cree

We Stop Covering For Lateness And Start Setting Boundaries

Kefla and Crecia Season 1 Episode 34

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 1:10:38

Missing one moment can change the whole mood, whether it is a concert you paid for, a job fair you showed up early to, or a classroom routine that only works when everybody buys in. We start with our week in educator mode: reassignment uncertainty, printing resumes, reading the room at a packed district job fair, and watching Kimani navigate the networking side of education. It is a real look at how school hiring feels from the inside and why your name, your relationships, and your consistency still matter.

Then we shift into what is going right, Zones of Regulation. We talk about emotional regulation in schools, why interactive training helps staff actually use the tools, and what it means when kids learn to name feelings and manage them without shame. From there, we get honest about therapy work: clients do not always tell the full truth at first, homework can trigger anxiety, and boundaries are not optional when vulnerability is on the table.

We also get into pop culture and people culture with Love Is Blind reunion reactions, then break down a viral Reddit story about a chronically late partner finally facing consequences. We close with a bigger question that hits home for teachers and parents: what can kids not do anymore, and what are schools teaching them to expect through policies like credit recovery?

Tap play, share this with a friend who needs the conversation, and leave a review. What topic do you want us to talk about next?

Send us your Questions or Comments and we’ll answer them on the show.

Don't forget to Like, Comment, Share, and Subscribe.

Thank you for listening!

Introductions Season Talk And Weather

SPEAKER_04

The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_06

One. Uno. Welcome back, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to the Refreshingly Normal podcast. I am Keefla.

SPEAKER_03

I am Lucretia, aka Cree.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, you aka though?

SPEAKER_03

Oh, no. I am Lucretia, D-S-T Cree.

SPEAKER_06

All right, all right, all right. I like that. Um, so today is uh episode 34.

SPEAKER_03

34.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

And we are in the equattro.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, so I think we'll do six more and then we'll have a season.

SPEAKER_03

All right.

SPEAKER_06

And then we'll, you know, go to season two. Um, and then we'll probably just release like some clips or something from um for about two weeks. Or we, you know.

SPEAKER_03

We're going on vacation.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, we're going on vacation. Nah, we're gonna keep going.

SPEAKER_01

Keep pushing along.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, keep the consistency and everything like that. I think is it's helping. Um, so let's talk about this week. Uh it's cold today in in the house. I turned up yesterday.

SPEAKER_03

But it feels I was gonna say delicious outside. So it'll work. It feels good outside.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

It's a good day to go out and eat at uh outdoor eating.

SPEAKER_06

Somebody's patio today.

SPEAKER_03

Or the winery today.

Job Fair Reassignment And Networking

SPEAKER_06

Oh, yeah. I bet you, I bet you it's jam-packed today. And I bet you the uh, what's the thing downtown? The belt line. Belt line. Yeah, I bet the belt line is off the chisel for shit so. Yeah, it was cold this morning when we went to the um Job Fair. Yeah, went to the job fair. So I had to go to Walmart to get some um paper first. Some um car stock paper.

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh, resume.

SPEAKER_06

So it was like six, uh, was it about six something?

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

Man, old folks was already shopping.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

On a Saturday.

SPEAKER_06

Coming out their cart with their cart, um, their little motorized cart with uh the front basket filled with stuff.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, I already. I don't think I'll ever be do that.

SPEAKER_06

You might?

SPEAKER_03

I doubt it.

SPEAKER_06

You be the one that ones with your little cart. That'll be getting out to your heart.

SPEAKER_03

Because guess what? I'm gonna walk myself into my um casket. I'm gonna be walking till the day I die. All right. I ain't gonna be in no scooter. All right. I heard that. That's right.

SPEAKER_06

I ain't gonna, I don't know, because I'm gonna be 400-something years old. I told you.

SPEAKER_03

What's that? How who are you? I'm you, Miss Barbara. I'm 100 years old.

SPEAKER_06

That's ABBA Elementary reference for those of you who are not ABBA Elementary.

SPEAKER_03

On the 100th Day of School episode.

SPEAKER_06

All right, so um, let's see. Oh, and then what? I got the resume paper at the theme, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Um, and you know, I did my little spew, my little spill, told them, you know, I'm already in the district. Um and I've been reassigned as a special ed teacher, and I just want to put my, you know, face in front of the um principals so that they'll be able to put a name with the face once my name comes across as those potential reassignees.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

So they said, oh, that's a good, that's a good job. Well, great, great. Well, we don't have nothing right now. So out of all of that, I had I gave one resume away. One lady I gave a resume and I said, spayed. She said, Oh, here, okay, gave it back to me.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, no. Don't even say what school that was.

SPEAKER_06

What you think it was?

SPEAKER_03

I'm not saying it.

SPEAKER_06

Um I'm not even saying it. Not too far from us, though.

SPEAKER_03

I'm not even saying it.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but um, it was it was it was a little crazy, craziness.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Cause you're like, We get all this information about being reassigned, but then they acting like, where you where where have you been reassigned to? I said, I don't know yet. Oh, you don't know? So some people just said, do you know? Right. Some people do know what they've been reassigned to. And some people don't.

SPEAKER_03

Maybe that explains the conversation with your principal then. Anyways.

SPEAKER_06

Maybe. But also the uh um that one school, uh, the guy said, Oh, yeah, we we we um definitely will have something available. And I said, Yeah, mom, Wayne's my guy. Oh, I love Wayne, yeah, that's my guy. All right, yeah. That's what they said. They was like, Yeah, we love. Oh, okay. When I said uh Wayne, I'll tell you, uh so. But anyway, it was cool to watch uh Kimani go through the job fair.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yes, Kimani did the job fair.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, maneuver his way. He was talking 50,000 miles per minute on the way up there. Was it?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, because he was nervous and excited, uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

And um, you know, it was a long line. We got them in great timing, so we were kind of at the front. Um, but he was like, we got it, it's gonna be a line for a job first. I said, Yes, because one, you got people um who are, you know, changing counties. Yeah. Uh people within the district who are being reassigned. They're trying to some of them.

SPEAKER_03

Reassigned or some who just want to go somewhere else.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, want to go somewhere else and they're trying to see what's available.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Um, I said, you're not gonna see many students because KSU has their own, you know, educational fair. Uh UGA has their own. I said, all those schools, they they normally have their own. So they won't flock to uh to Georgia. I mean to Atlanta like that. And so we got in line. He was like, man, I think I'm probably the the what he said, like the youngest? The yeah, but he said like the 13th percentile in age group here. He said everything else. Everybody's old. It was something that that made me say, you need some help?

SPEAKER_03

Oh no.

SPEAKER_06

Yes.

SPEAKER_03

It's time for them to retire.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_03

Teaching must be their second career.

SPEAKER_06

And then we were we were looking at people that we could tell that's been teaching for a long time, that are teachers based off of their clothes, their bags and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_00

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

Um, and then we saw the ones we was like, oh no, I couldn't put my kid in their class. Just by the walk. And I was like, ooh, bless our hearts. So, but um, it was cool just to see him go through it. Um, but yeah, it wasn't nothing available. You know, at as far as high school didn't say nothing. Elementary had quite a few. But I didn't I didn't, you know, submit anything to elementary.

SPEAKER_03

I wonder with because of how, you know, the the the um unit classrooms and things have been pulled out. Well, no, that shouldn't impact you because that means they're gonna need they should need more IRR because of that.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Who knows?

SPEAKER_06

So I mean, uh but at the end of the day, if high school didn't have anything, then it may mean I may I might go to another level. If they reassign.

SPEAKER_03

If that's what happens. Because right now it's it's kinda all Yeah, then you know, but uh Yeah, it's kinda willy-nilly.

SPEAKER_06

I'm good either way it goes.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Cause, hey, my um internship starts in the in June.

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

And um two weeks of training, and then I go full-fledged.

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

And we rocking the road, then two semesters of well, the practicum is in June, then two semesters of internship.

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

So that'll be fall, semester, and spring.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yep, so I'm ready, Freddie.

SPEAKER_03

All right, ready, Freddy.

SPEAKER_06

That was my day. But my week was pretty good. Um got some stuff done, got at work, got uh had great workouts in the gym. Um some days I needed a mental push. You know, after the news they gave me on Tuesday, I'm being reassigned, uh.

SPEAKER_03

Well, maybe. He got a, he gotta maybe. With whatever happens, we know everything happens for a reason. That's what I'm saying. So we just go with it. But yo.

Zones Of Regulation Training Highlights

SPEAKER_06

He did that. He he he he really did that. Okay. He did that. And so um, what else? What else happened this week? Nothing else. So what what happened with you?

SPEAKER_03

Well, this week I did a zones of regulation training for anybody who wanted to come could sign up to come. So I had a good amount of participants who came.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, I talked to my coworker too. I said, Man, I heard you was the only guy in there.

SPEAKER_03

The ladies try to invite him over to their table.

SPEAKER_06

I was by myself.

SPEAKER_03

They they did try to invite him over, the ladies, and he was like, Oh, I'm fine, I'm good, I'm I'm good. And then all my in my trainings is very interactive. So they're gonna be parachuting, they're gonna be talking, they're gonna be working in groups, they're gonna be doing stuff. And so there he was at his little table. So he had ended up going with a group, and the ladies that invited him before were like, We told you to come join our table.

SPEAKER_06

So they came with it from the beginning. Yeah. Now he was laughing hard. I said, I said, Well, next time, man, if you need to say, Hey, sign your husband up so you ain't by myself. Okay, that way I can come with you.

SPEAKER_03

So he came and he said he really enjoyed it. That's what he told me, at least. Um, and so um it went really well. And this is what was really interesting. So um when I when we took the break to go to lunch, because it was a full-day training, um, they were with me all day. Um, when we took a break to go to lunch, one of the ladies says, I just have to stop and tell you, you are a great presenter. You are so good at this. She's like, I mean, I could listen to you talk all day. She said, You, you're, you're, you are just so refreshing.

SPEAKER_06

I said, refreshingly normal, that is.

SPEAKER_03

Anyways, I thought that was funny that she that was her choice of words to use.

SPEAKER_06

But that's what Tony said. He said, We were somewhere, he said, You may he said, Yeah, man, Keith, you just uh who's Tony? At um Tony Time. Oh, Tony Time. Yeah, from the thing, he said that too. And I said, hey, that's the name of the podcast, especially normal.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. That's us, man. That is us. So my training um went well, and uh then still had to do some walks, and all of my I am I'm just gonna toot my own horn.

SPEAKER_06

Toot it.

SPEAKER_03

Or you can wear, I'll toot it for you.

SPEAKER_05

I toot it, I toot that horn.

SPEAKER_03

But all of my schools that I support with zones, they are doing great.

SPEAKER_05

That's good.

SPEAKER_03

And it has not, you know, as you know, people are kind of getting implementing and trying to get people who don't buy in to buy in, and you know how school is with things, but I'm just so proud of all of them. They are doing so great, and just the idea of like all these um children that are used to expressing emotions, knowing I need some something to manage it, they talking about their feelings. They're doing like they are going to be great, well balanced, emotionally sound adults. That's good. So, anyways, I need more of them. We do so um, and then even through my training, it was uh I had a couple of admin in their principals, and they were like, has this always been available? And I was like, Hell, it has been. And uh, I'm gonna tell my friends about it. But yeah, uh, it's always been a thing.

SPEAKER_06

So um anywho See, it's always been available, but but I don't know if all of this all of this has been available. The presenter has not always been available now that I'm here.

SPEAKER_03

Now let's get it. That's what you should have told him.

SPEAKER_01

That's what you should have told me. Well, I shouldn't have told her that.

Therapy Trust Homework And Boundaries

SPEAKER_03

Um so, anyways, that was good this week. And um, of course, um I have my clients in the evening. Um that went fine. That went. Uh I think it went well. I'm saying it went well, but it we had some challenges. But it went well. But it went well.

SPEAKER_06

That's right. You're getting your bearings a bit. I am starting to experience the fullness of your clients. You know, because they don't reveal.

SPEAKER_03

No, that's true. They don't reveal. And you know what I thought about some of the things that happened. Um I guess I should be proud that they were comfortable enough to say the things or share the things or or do whatever and um communicate in a way that I can provide them with the support they need, but we can also get them what they need. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

One of our when I we did a residency, one of the uh professors said, Some of the biggest liars in the world are clients. He said, Because it's just they either withhold the truth, don't tell you the full truth, or don't tell you the truth at all. He said, It's just how it is. You know, he said, so you have to uh understand that, you know, in time, when they become comfortable with you, they'll start revealing pieces of the truth. And some still may hold it even after because you've gave them all these great tools and they didn't do it, so they're like, Oh, I don't want her to be disappointed in me or him to be disappointed. Uh-huh. That I find that too.

SPEAKER_03

Because some of them all say, Okay, let's look at some of the work you're supposed to do. And I'm like, and they go.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

And I said, No, it's okay. I said, and every time I give them extra like something to try in the real home world, the homework.

SPEAKER_01

Life work.

SPEAKER_03

Um, I said, now listen, if this homework makes you anxious and you didn't get to it, don't worry about it. We will just talk about it and we'll try again next week because you're already here.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, you're here now.

SPEAKER_03

Because you're anxious.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_03

Um, and then they you're right, they do get to tell to lying because then once they get comfortable, they'll say something and I'll go, now wait a minute. Because they said in my mind, and sometimes depending on if I need if that's the what they need the truth to kind of keep us going. I'll say, okay, well, help me understand. Because last time I I remember you saying this. And today you're saying this. So tell like help me. Okay, now what's going on?

SPEAKER_06

They're gonna be like, I need a copy of my notes after each meeting.

SPEAKER_03

So I know what lie I got to keep. What lie I got to keep going with?

SPEAKER_01

This ain't fair.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. And sometimes I'll try to act like I don't know. Now what did you? And then they look at me like, wait, what?

SPEAKER_06

Is she baiting? Is she baiting me? I know she knows. I know she knows. And then they be like, but I okay, what should I say?

SPEAKER_00

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

But that's kids though. Yeah. And with adults too.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

But uh the one thing about uh therapy, it's it is almost an adult uh not adult, uh um, it's like adults change roles. When they get in that client seat, it's like they become that kid again. Because you're questioning them about their behavior. And you're, you know, trying to help them get their behavior right. And the last time anyone has probably done that to some of these adults is, you know, when they were kids.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know what I mean? It's the last time.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know, so yeah, it's it's a it's a different uh dynamic for a lot, especially those movers and shakers and you know, power pushers in the in the industry and businesses and stuff.

SPEAKER_03

That they, yeah, they have to ever space to be so vulnerable.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, never been questioned, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then now hear the all of a sudden they get it.

SPEAKER_03

And and I can see now why people have to be so careful about um the therapist and relationships with, because you do share so many things, and how either uh a therapist who misuses their role. Correct. Um, I kind of think that sometimes that happens with pastors and people like that because they're dealing with people in vernality.

SPEAKER_06

Anytime you a person in power, not any time, but every job that has a position of power, there's been some misuse. Yeah. Not from everybody, but in every you could say a pastor, yes, there's been a example. Teacher, there's been an example.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

You know, like that, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

And then I could also see like for, and vice versa, um how a client could grow close to you because maybe you are the one and only person who actually talked to them, um, listens to them, um, giving them strategies, and and so I can see good when they come.

SPEAKER_06

When they leave you, they'll be like, I never felt like this.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

And then they go, did they help me? Or did I think they're really trying to help me? Like that. Like a little twisted mind.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-huh. Then things get twisted, or they just feel like then they can fall in love with people and that sort of thing. So I can see how all that can occur.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, you have to be careful.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, you have to be careful and pay and as a and and not to ignore because there are things that you'll be like, what? And then you have to pay attention to that situation. Set them straight.

SPEAKER_06

This is a client um relationship. We gotta keep that therapist coming.

SPEAKER_03

And my job is to do what I'm doing. I'm not doing it because I like you or love you, but I'm just doing my, you know, what I'm doing.

SPEAKER_01

So, anyways. Yep.

Love Is Blind Reunion Hot Takes

SPEAKER_06

Alright, so um this week.

SPEAKER_03

Yes.

SPEAKER_06

This week we uh caught up, we ain't finished. The reunion show.

SPEAKER_03

Oh.

SPEAKER_06

Of Love is Blind. So we caught the first. Oh, oh, y'all saw the well. Y'all know what that means. So that means she cheated. So you finished it, then you not finished. You started watching it then.

SPEAKER_03

A little bit of it.

SPEAKER_06

So, okay.

SPEAKER_03

But I didn't finish it all.

SPEAKER_06

Well, ladies and gentlemen, let's move on to the next thing. We're not even gonna talk about it. Since we're gonna talk about the city. We didn't even talk about the first part.

SPEAKER_03

We didn't talk about the first part.

SPEAKER_06

They don't need to talk about none of them now. Don't worry about it. All right, let's go to the story.

SPEAKER_03

Am I reading the story?

SPEAKER_06

I guess so. It don't even matter now. You probably already read it.

SPEAKER_03

Well, you did send some of these to me. So which one am I reading? You sent these to me already.

SPEAKER_06

No, I did. Am I reading I thought we were gonna talk about Love is Blouring You and then? Oh my god, I can't wait to finish watching.

SPEAKER_03

We can still talk about it.

SPEAKER_06

Alright, go ahead and talk about it.

SPEAKER_03

Are you gonna talk about it?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I'm gonna talk about it. Talk about what I seen. Okay, so what did you what are your thoughts about the uh part one, the night we stopped watching?

SPEAKER_03

Okay, well, of course I still knew. Well, first of all, it was too many spoilers out there this time. And I don't know why I got so many well, you sent me some.

SPEAKER_06

But I didn't know. I just I just sent the boy a picture.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, so some of the spoilers I already knew about, but I specifically want to talk about the little uh speech pathologist.

SPEAKER_06

This the lady didn't have no lips, yes.

SPEAKER_03

I don't know what's wrong with people, like the people in the audience and all the people, y'all fell for that.

SPEAKER_06

They did because they saw her every time she was talking, they was like they fell for that.

SPEAKER_03

And the thing they got what she got them was with the her daughter. Yeah, first of all, I'm not the he was right. I agree. What is his name?

SPEAKER_06

Oh no, I don't know, none of them names.

SPEAKER_03

I know, and I'm terrible with names. Um, so the guy, the husky guy, the husky guy, um he's right. I'm not gonna sit up.

SPEAKER_01

He didn't say bye.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I'm not gonna sit up and let you talk crazy to me and say, well, I gotta stick it out because I've already met the kid. Heck no. No, it's better to cut do the thing now. And when he started talking about how she was uh toe-down, drunk at that at the friend's wedding, where he was the best man at the wedding and how embarrassing and all of that was. She didn't have a word to say then. She did not say that's not true. I wasn't crowded turned in.

SPEAKER_06

The crowd said, Oh, oh. I wasn't gonna say anything, but she's like, oh, oh.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, and so she heard a little upset.

SPEAKER_06

It was already like there.

SPEAKER_03

That little lips said, it really went away after that disappeared. So I don't care that he's met the little girl and he's done all the things. Mama, that what this said to me was she's not gonna change because she got all those, oh, like she did that well with me, and she got all those sympathy looks and tears from people. So she in her mind still feels like um she didn't do anything wrong. She was wronged by him. Yeah, and she was not wrong, so she's not gonna fix herself. So her poor little daughter um keep keep welcoming in.

SPEAKER_06

Me and that mama gonna that gonna leave mama.

SPEAKER_03

That gonna leave mama. And then they try to say, like, she hated men, but this sh no. What you need to be doing is hey, I don't want people shouldn't hate yourself, but she needs to work on herself.

SPEAKER_06

She needs to hate the person that she is right now and become the better person. She needs to work on that. Sometimes when you just dislike the person, you become them again. Yeah. But hate is such a strong word that you try to stay away from it. And that's what she needs to do. She needs to stay away from the person who she is right now.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. So she needs to work on herself. And he was right with everything that he said. And I believe in um protecting your peace and setting your thing. And what you said and setting your boundaries. And so he did the right thing.

SPEAKER_06

I said I couldn't do it. I was with him. I was with him. And then she got up. I think she's a drunk. Yeah, she did all that. Remember, I asked you. Remember when she was on the show? She was all. I said, oh, she told you. So yeah, they both get a little. When they was at the wedding. Yeah, they both get a little bit. They both get a little. Because she started talking so much, you know, before she got married. I said, Oh yeah, she's a little lit.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, so I think she might be a little bit of a drunk. Um, so yeah, I think he did the right thing. But that really just kind of tied my high that she did that, and everybody's like, she don't have no lips, so she gets all the alcohol.

SPEAKER_06

So when you don't have no lips, like yo, all go straight to the throat. But when you got lips, you block a little bit of the alcohol. So you can't drink so fast. Yeah, because you still don't drink, you don't even drink a bottle unless you crave the whole mouth on the bottle, she done go here. Uh-huh. But no lips, it's all the bottle getting in. So she can just chug it. Yep. Okay. That's what it is. That's exactly what it is. I realize it now.

SPEAKER_03

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

Yep. Yeah. And who else?

SPEAKER_03

Um about my boy. Oh, yeah. Who?

SPEAKER_05

Dread talk like this.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I knew he and he and the girl were gonna still be together. I I knew that I that's because of those locks.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, uh just think this. Oh, girl. Because even when he was looking to people talk, he said.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, he did. But he got those locks. But um, yeah, so I knew they were gonna still be together. There just was a special connection there with the um even the family, the friend photos.

SPEAKER_06

Like I saw another friend photo. I was like, oh yeah. Yeah, she fit in good with the channel.

SPEAKER_03

She fit in good with the crew. Um, if they didn't, they weren't gonna have that barrier in regards to the different races because she, her friend group um was diverse. Um and so yeah, she she was she knew and she's been familiar with black culture and black people, and so um that worked for them.

SPEAKER_06

I saw something. I didn't listen to the whole interview, I mean a whole uh spiel the lady was doing, but she said that you know how they were so afraid. I mean, the reason why they moved them to somewhere else, right?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, why?

SPEAKER_06

They said because this and I saw two theories. Well, I saw one theory and one question. They was like, Y'all um, y'all talking about y'all didn't have enough money to do X, Y, and Z for the show, and that's why y'all had them not come to wherever they went, Cabo or wherever it was. But y'all bring back uh every 1500 cash trip. Uh-huh. And so they were saying, so y'all should so that wasn't true. Y'all had enough money. So then this girl on another one, she said, y'all was so worried about all the couples last time not walking making it to the altar. And so the one couple that you knew had the strongest chance of making it to the altar, y'all kept them separate so that they wouldn't be poisoned with everybody else in all their turmoil. So that they could at least have one couple for real to make it to the altar. One couple for real to make it to the altar. I was thinking. What was you thinking?

SPEAKER_03

I was thinking they're so level headed, would they have um intervened and it would have been less drama?

SPEAKER_06

Less drama? No. I don't think they would have intervened. Okay. I think they would have been so into each other and that would be like, man, that's so sorry for you. Yeah. Because it definitely wouldn't have mattered with the with the shorter guy. He came back with the long hair. They got on him. What was his name? Chris?

SPEAKER_03

Is that his little raggedy name?

SPEAKER_06

They was on him. Mr.

SPEAKER_03

Raggedy. Oh, and you could tell when he was on there. So what was everybody got mad? When he was the moment he sat down, he was whatever. But I'm telling you, there were some things that happened behind the scenes, the way they treated him. And when he came out on the stage, he was caring more than just how he appeared. But I think some people treated him.

SPEAKER_06

He was carrying, he was caring, oh, this is how it's gonna be attitude. That's how when he sat down, he was like, Okay. Yeah he knew he was in for it. Yeah. So even when people reply, he has short, I mean, said things to him. He had short responses, short replies. And like I guess, and then my coworker, she's she noticed the same thing I noticed that you didn't notice because you was playing Uno while we was at the table watching the thing. And so she said, Ooh, and Nick is tired of him too. Because even um, what's his wife's name? Vanessa. She said, even Vanessa had to put her hand on.

SPEAKER_05

I said, That's what I said.

SPEAKER_06

I said, That's what I said. I said, he was talking, he was going off.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And Vanessa put her hand on Nick like that. I don't got time for you to be getting known. She's like, come on.

SPEAKER_03

I said, ooh, I wonder they had some words before.

SPEAKER_06

Who?

SPEAKER_03

Uh, Nick and the guy.

SPEAKER_06

Because Nick will come when they doing like the fittings and probably didn't dap him up or was like, you know, treating him as if he was man, forget you, you know, that that kind of vibe.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, I wonder.

SPEAKER_06

Probably so.

SPEAKER_03

But yeah, and then he came, he did come back very apologetic, but um, yeah, I it's gonna take him a while to get that label off of him.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

I think, I think, I'm just thinking of all the people that watch the show, like yeah, he'll be fine. You think he'll be fine?

SPEAKER_06

Okay. How many people do we know that had a reputation of being a hoe or a dog and the very same week they got a boot? That even knew that they was a hoe or a dog.

SPEAKER_03

Well, that's true.

SPEAKER_06

He'll be fine. There's somebody out there.

SPEAKER_03

Well, I thought was also crazy that he was worried about like somebody doing being fit and working out, and he was worried about their financial background and this and that. And come to find out, he does not even have a financial like his the money he was trying to pretend like he had. He ain't balling like that. Not even balling. Lies.

SPEAKER_06

Oh boy, him and him and Devante, his name is Devontae. Devontae said he wanted prenup and got in that Honda, a Honda Accord.

SPEAKER_01

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

And everybody's like, what?

SPEAKER_01

Who wants half of that little sedan?

SPEAKER_06

All his money in the trunk. Right. I said, yeah, a Honda is a good car. But he talked prenup like he got in a Maserata or something.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. And he said he has.

SPEAKER_06

I saw something online, and it said, look, I'm not an advocate of bullying, but someone called him Fatrick Mahomes. You know, Patrick Mahomes, he kind of looked like he does look like Fredrick Mahomes.

SPEAKER_01

It said Fatrick Malone.

SPEAKER_03

Fatrick Malone. He does. He does. But he did. He really thought he was somebody. He did. He was the bear. And the girl that he got paired with is gorgeous. She's beautiful. So I'm sure she's gonna find her little man.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. We got well, I gotta watch the rest and see what they say. I don't even know. You know what I'm saying? Somebody already watched a little bit. But anywho, that was that was what we caught up on. I need to catch up on the night agent. Did you watch the night agent with me? Because that's why I haven't watched it. I was gonna watch it when I was sitting down, but I was like, I don't remember you watching. I think you did start watching it.

SPEAKER_03

Maybe. I don't know.

SPEAKER_06

What about Lincoln Lawyer? Did you watch any of that with me?

SPEAKER_03

Here and there.

SPEAKER_06

Okay, so that means I can watch that one. Um, because I didn't want to. See, I don't like to um show cheat on my wife. I'm committed. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02

You will.

SPEAKER_06

All right, let's read the story. Um Okay. They're short stories.

SPEAKER_02

They are.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, very short stories. But they're good stories. And they're relatable stories, too.

SPEAKER_02

Oh.

SPEAKER_03

All right. So this story is called, it's titled Man Stops Rushing Chronically Late Wife to Teach Her a Lesson. Now he wonders if he went too far.

SPEAKER_06

Now scroll, it'll get to the story. It'll say what a story is.

SPEAKER_03

I'm right after years of that.

SPEAKER_06

No, keep going.

SPEAKER_03

Right here?

SPEAKER_06

It's it's highlighted. It's like, let me spotlight right there.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, the story. Okay. In a post on Reddit, a 31-year-old man said he's constantly compensating for his wife's chronic lateness. According to him, she's almost always behind schedule, often because she's setting up lights and taking photos for Instagram. She's trying to grow as a content creator, something he admits he finds silly. To avoid embarrassment, he developed a workaround. He told her events started 40 to 45 minutes earlier than they actually did. It worked for years. They'd arrive on time and she never realized she was operating on a false schedule. But recently, after multiple late arrivals in one month, he told her he was done.

SPEAKER_06

Done, honey.

SPEAKER_03

No more buffer. Then came her birthday. He bought tickets to an event featuring her favorite performers, artists scheduled to appear in the first act. She went through her usual. She went through her usual pre-event routine, complete with studio lights and photos. He said he realized they were missing her favorite performers, but didn't say anything. When they arrived and she figured it out, she broke down. She accused him of enjoying her reaction and putting his ego first. He told her this was the consequence of not taking him seriously. Things escalated at home and she now and she ended up going to her mother's house.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, this is a believe it, sister story.

SPEAKER_06

Now he's wondering if if he if he wronged if he wronged or if he went too far.

SPEAKER_03

If he was wrong to let her learn the hard way. Oh, okay. So because we the commenters.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I think I agree. You agree with her? With him. Okay. I was about to say.

SPEAKER_03

No, I agree with him because we have some late people that we deal with and we do the same thing. Depending on what it is and how important it is for them to be there, we will give a different time.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah, definitely. Definitely.

SPEAKER_03

We will tell them a different time. But if it doesn't matter when they arrive, whatever time the festivity is supposed to begin, we don't wait on nobody.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, we just go ahead and start eating and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_03

And doing what we're gonna do.

SPEAKER_06

It's your plate when you fix it, and do whatever when you do it.

SPEAKER_03

Mm-hmm is what we what we end up doing. But I mean, she now has she learned her lesson. Because she immediately went to, you're getting a kick out of this. She had an out too. She went to her mom because of that. And if I if that was my daughter, girl, you are late. Because I know her mama knows she's knows she's late all the time. If you don't get your little self on up out of here crying over a concert because you miss people because you want to be a content creator, that mama should have sent her right on back home to her husband. I would have.

SPEAKER_06

There's nothing wrong with being a content creator. If you know it's making you late, then you gotta start creating your content earlier. Earlier. That's just how it is. You know? You have to do it earlier because you can't um you can't hinder everyone else in the home or in your life, you know, for that reason.

SPEAKER_03

And he was nice to like make a different time. Say for years. For years doing that. I mean, at that at that point, I just would have been leaving her. We're gonna have to drive two separate cars, meet me at the end, and I'll just meet you, you meet me at the place. Because in a way, he kind of crippled her.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Because he didn't, he didn't, she still was doing the same behavior. Well, he still was doing the same behavior, yeah. Because of no consequences, no, it's no consequences. She's still thinking they're arriving late, she doesn't really care. But so she she doesn't even realize what's going on, but she's doing the same behavior because he's adjusted himself. Yeah, but he has not taught her, no, you need to learn how to be on time. So I agree. I think um he he did the right thing. I mean, that's the the I mean it ended up feeling like the extreme because he let it go on for too long.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. And it was her, whoever her favorite artist was, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03

So she's like, I'm never gonna get to see him again. Yeah, and he did that. And that and that was indeed on purpose.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. He said, Oh, I definitely ain't gonna tell her today. Let's see if she hopped it up.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

Because she needs to feel some pain.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

So that maybe she won't do it again.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

And if she does, okay, well, it is what it is.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. I would just leave her. That's what I would do. I'm not waiting around for a while. Catch an Uber, dear. Or if she's taking that long, she would roll up into the bedroom and I'd be in my pajamas.

SPEAKER_06

Because Yeah, we don't miss the time.

SPEAKER_03

We done missed the time. We two hours, however many hours late to the event.

SPEAKER_06

My artist is gonna be on first, and we just missed them, so I ain't no need for us to be going.

SPEAKER_03

Child, I I'm on my pajamas. You want to go roll in there late? That's your business. I'm good.

SPEAKER_06

I hate rolling in places late. I hate it.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm just imagining how late they probably were.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Like an hour to two hours late.

SPEAKER_01

For a whole performance? Forget about it. You missed a whole bunch.

SPEAKER_03

And I had to pay tickets for a concert.

SPEAKER_06

Come on now.

SPEAKER_03

No.

SPEAKER_06

And that's just all the things they missed that he's just been pissed about.

SPEAKER_03

I'm not going. I'm gonna tell you about this how my uh brother can be the same way. And so he The license. He um was needing to go get his license after coming home from a place.

SPEAKER_00

Vacation down south.

SPEAKER_03

Vacation down south. And um he asked if I could take him to the DMV. And I said, sure, I'll take you. I said, but listen, we need to be there when the DMV opens because it gets packed, it gets crowded.

SPEAKER_06

I have got y'all didn't have no uh cameras taking y'all's license in Kansas. Y'all had a person that was drawing them. So it it took a long time.

SPEAKER_03

Whatever. And so I told, I said, so I'm gonna be up. We're gonna leave here so we can be at the door when it opens because I have got to go to work today. And so he was like, all right. So I set my alarm, I got up.

SPEAKER_01

Set it.

SPEAKER_03

Um I'm looking. I guess he was wanting to have uh the best picture of the day because he was really in there like doing primping, getting himself together. I said, Listen, it's time to go. All right, I'm going. So I went and I sat in the car and I waited till I knew that by when we leave, we not gonna be first in line.

SPEAKER_06

So how long you think you waited in total?

SPEAKER_03

Um, I think in the car I waited somewhere between 20 and 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Because by that time, because you know, I'm not even gonna get up. I'm gonna get I get up on right on time.

SPEAKER_06

But I'm saying, like, you didn't just get up and then go in the car. You was probably waiting in the house for a while too. Yes. And then say, you know what? I'm gonna go wait in the car. Yes.

SPEAKER_03

So how long do you think how long do you think you probably I don't know, maybe, maybe somewhere almost close to an hour. Okay. And so then I said, well, let me go to the door. Cause I make sure I slam the door so he knows, oh, she's going to get in the car. So I thought, well, maybe that'll make him rush a little bit. Because I'm saying, hurry up. And I thought, well, maybe this will rush him and he'll he'll get to going. So when he still and I'm sitting out there and he wasn't getting to going. Let me tell y'all what this sister did.

SPEAKER_06

What sister did?

SPEAKER_03

I turned that car off, went back in the house, took off my clothes, put back on my pajamas, and went to bed. To bed. So he said, I can hear him saying, Where Chris had? Where because I was just me and I said, he said, You ain't gonna take me. No. That's why he had because mama was at work and daddy was at work. And he said, You're not gonna take me? I said, I'm not. I said, I told you what time to be ready. I'm not gonna be rushing through my day because now we gotta wait longer and I gotta get to work. Yeah, I'm not getting ready to put on my work bank business suit to go sit with you. Not your teleclothes I said, I'm not gonna do it. I said, I told you what time to be ready. I told you what time I want to be there. How would you like that, baby? I said, now if you would like to try again tomorrow, I get you can try again tomorrow. I can't believe it. Did it do and da-de-d-dee did guess what this sister did? Went back to sleep. Before I went back to sleep, uh, I said some choice words. Uh-oh. He said, I'm telling mama, you cussing. Tell her baboo. Good night. Close my close my door, please.

SPEAKER_06

It didn't lock.

SPEAKER_03

We don't have a lot of time.

SPEAKER_06

I know the door don't lock.

SPEAKER_03

They didn't believe you. You couldn't lock, you couldn't lock your door.

SPEAKER_06

Uh uh, I'd be like, man, these doors don't lock.

SPEAKER_03

They did not have locks on their doors.

SPEAKER_06

And I locked doors all the time.

SPEAKER_03

Yes, he locks doors all the time.

SPEAKER_01

No.

SPEAKER_06

I locked all doors.

SPEAKER_03

We couldn't have locks on our doors. Um, that is funny why we didn't have it. Because as lenient as my parents are, you would think they would be like, okay, you can have locks. No, they didn't. Um, and so so anywho, my little cousin, Miko, came and took him. Oh. And she and and he was like, Miko came. I said, Well, I'm so happy. Good. I'm so good. The great. I'm glad. I wonder how long they stayed in there, too. She was able to take you.

SPEAKER_06

I wonder how long they had to stay in there.

SPEAKER_03

I don't play those games. Never have.

SPEAKER_06

Never will.

SPEAKER_03

Never will, baby.

Kids Life Skills And School Standards

SPEAKER_06

All right. So do you want to read the second story or you want to save that and we can go into just a few things that kids can't do nowadays?

SPEAKER_03

Oh, we can do what kids can't do nowadays.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Is that also a thingy?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I said uh it's the last thing I sent. So just right off the rip, what do you think are some things kids can't do?

SPEAKER_03

Like, can't do on their own, like they should be able to do at a specific age?

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh. Like we mentioned too, like some kids come to school. Remember, we said something about some of these young kids coming to school, not even potty train. Yeah, that is true there.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. And the mama's thinking that that is the teacher's job.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

I'm gonna say tie shoes.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, that's what some of the stuff that was on. Yeah, the two. What's the age you think they should be able to tie shoes? Uh, y'all can tell us in the in the comments what what age do you think a kid should be able to tie shoes?

SPEAKER_03

When they go to kindergarten.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Okay. Um, and I have worked with- They don't have no, you know, no learning disability, uh-huh, or something like that.

SPEAKER_03

I have worked with um some teachers that have told the parents that uh if your child does not know how to tie their shoes, please don't send them to send them to school with shoes that tie. You need to get some velcro until they learn how to tie the shoes.

SPEAKER_06

I've seen little kids who can't even do the velcro.

unknown

What?

SPEAKER_03

Yes, so they don't have the hand eye coordination.

SPEAKER_06

They they just Is that what it is? Or or undiagnosed.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, I know.

SPEAKER_06

But I was like, you don't know how to strap nigga.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Mm-mm. Like you see those clips with that little African kids be talking? Like they'll have a word and they have to say the word.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And that one little kid, he something wrong with him, because he'll say, it'll be like uh two words. It'll say something like, uh like Nicki Minaj, and he said, chicken and chicken.

SPEAKER_00

Where he got chicken from?

SPEAKER_06

Chicken is his go-to word. Something he don't know. Because one point one time it was like a lot of words, and it was chicken, was you know, it kept showing up.

SPEAKER_03

Like that one when they kept missing it. When they had Nutella, and they said, What does this say? He says, Peanuts butter.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. But they go through, and all these kids, they'll say stuff, they'll like probability and stuff like that. And he said, uh, chicken. I said, Oh Lord. I love it, and every time I see it, I send it to Janaski. You know, because I know as a teacher, you know, you know that you sometimes you say stuff, you're like, kids say you had to turn your head away from them. But uh, I think one thing that kids can't do is tell analog time.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yeah, that was on there.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, they can't tell time.

SPEAKER_03

Well, they don't have to anymore.

SPEAKER_06

They they don't.

SPEAKER_03

Let me tell you where they will learn how to d do an analog clock.

SPEAKER_06

Where's that at?

SPEAKER_03

At Ella May's house, my mama's house. She got a million clock shows.

SPEAKER_06

Grandma? Well, we just got that one clock.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, no, my mama got a clock. I mean, she got clocks everywhere. I said, mama.

SPEAKER_06

And every and it's not, they're not on the same rhythm. It's like that's all day you hear. All day.

SPEAKER_03

I asked her, I said, are you obsessed with clocks? Like, do you I said, it looks like you really have an obsession with them.

SPEAKER_06

And it's not for the time. No. Some people are obsessed with time. Hard is for decoration, baby. Yeah. I love my mother-in-law, but do clocks.

SPEAKER_03

Decoration.

SPEAKER_06

One on the toilet top part, on the sink pole.

SPEAKER_03

I'm gonna say one up top.

SPEAKER_06

Because in the bathroom it's three, I want to say.

SPEAKER_03

It's either two or three. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I just want to say it's three in the bathroom.

SPEAKER_03

Then she got the one in the room. Every room got one. And then you come downstairs. There's that one on the wall there. And she every room. Every room has one or two clocks.

SPEAKER_06

My mother in law be clocking it.

unknown

Clock it.

SPEAKER_06

All day. Every room. It'd be like this. Clock it.

SPEAKER_03

We should do that. Next time we go to her, we go to Kansas. We gonna count them. We're gonna take things kind of.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, and we go, yeah. We're gonna show all the pictures. And every time we see one, what we do, Creek? Clock it.

SPEAKER_03

Clock it. Here's another one. Yes. Um I think this one is the one that said kids know they will pass no matter how unqualified, ill-equipped, and unprepared they are. They come to school with the attitude of, I won't do the work and you can't make me. Um and I you see that. Remember, was that with the CRCT, where if they didn't pass it, they couldn't go on to the next grade. Remember when they enforced that?

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03

And um, but then all of a sudden it went away.

SPEAKER_06

Because the parents could sign the waiver saying that they they wanted them to um to what do you call it, promote it. Oh, to be promoted. Yeah, because when I was in Clay Co, it was like that.

SPEAKER_03

I think they should keep it the same, especially when you have these parents who come back and say the school because failed my child. Failed my child. Well, having that documentation, I think that's also why why um having um RTI and all of that to show we did this intervention, that intervention, you um, we told you the child needs to be tested, you refuse, like all of that stuff is like important, but they do. Middle school is and I think that's why middle school are like the middle middle child in the family, because they realize that too. They don't have to repeat the class and then when they get Hey now.

SPEAKER_06

What you talking about? You had to repeat middle school? No, I'm I'm the middle child. You said middle school, like the middle child in the family.

SPEAKER_01

They require a lot of attention. I don't require a lot of attention. And they are that was the thing.

SPEAKER_06

That's why I am special because special. I wasn't the middle, I mean, I wasn't the oldest, and I wasn't the baby, so I entertained myself.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. But you entertain others.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, because I had all these other people in my head I was entertaining. Oh, God, see? But not crazy. That's why I could do all those characters. That's why I can do so many different things. So But yeah, they definitely need even when when COVID, remember COVID hit and they said they can't make anything below. I kind of understood that. Yeah, I did understand that, but we continue to.

SPEAKER_03

And so what point are we gonna drop it off and and put them back to the break?

SPEAKER_06

It was almost like we should have just said, well, no, we need to put learning on a hole. So what grades we in now is the grade you're gonna be in. We get out of COVID.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, well, you know what I think. Oh, that would have been. Because we lost, we lost fundamentals. Yeah. I I personally feel like in the high school students probably would be like, Miss Craig, I think we need to stop the credit recovery.

SPEAKER_01

We do?

SPEAKER_03

I think we need to stop the credit recovery because Or make it true credit recovery.

SPEAKER_06

Like it's you fail a whole semester and then in three days, yeah, you can pass it. Yeah. That's that's yeah.

SPEAKER_03

When we were in school, you had to go to summer. Summer school.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Um we didn't know. And it was free for us.

SPEAKER_06

Summer school was free for us. Ours wasn't ours. Because I would read why I know it was free. Because all the people that I know that went couldn't afford it.

SPEAKER_03

I bet you what. I know it wasn't free. I bet it wasn't free for everybody. I bet it depended. It was by socioeconomics.

SPEAKER_06

About a lunch. If you had free lunch, you had free source. Yep, I bet that. Yeah, I should just ask my brother, because they went. Yeah. Yeah. I ain't never go.

SPEAKER_03

I did have to go to summer school one time, and because it was um um You was being a Miss Sass appearance, probably in school, been.

SPEAKER_06

Just talking. Yep. I told you.

SPEAKER_03

And that semester, my grades were not. I did not have a curl in high school. Oh, what you had then? I had a regular old perm. You had the uh had a perm. It was like this.

SPEAKER_06

The eighth semester.

SPEAKER_03

I had that in ninth grade. When did you have then? And then I turned to Halleberry. The Bob. I think I turned to Haliberry 10th grade. Okay. Um then I had haliberry then. And I had that all throughout. And then one year you had the uh what's her name? Oh no, that's wrong. I didn't get Halleberry till um 12th grade because I still had that 11th grade because I got too much.

SPEAKER_06

What year did you have the China doll?

SPEAKER_03

What's the China doll?

SPEAKER_06

Because one of them pictures looked like you had a Chinese bowl cut.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, that was one. That was not that was a ponytail.

SPEAKER_06

It was the Bob Ponytail. Right, just like this. All the way.

SPEAKER_03

No, what was that? I don't remember that. That was no bang.

SPEAKER_06

It was a hole, it was a boon.

SPEAKER_03

He's making up that ain't even me. I ain't that.

SPEAKER_06

I'm gonna find a picture.

SPEAKER_03

Find it.

SPEAKER_06

I'm gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_03

Because I do not even know what he's talking about.

SPEAKER_06

That thing was straight across.

SPEAKER_03

Anyway. But I had to go to summer school because my and I remember my mom being so upset. She was like, What is going on? That's right. I mean, you at school every day. Yeah. You're not passing. I was like, and then for me, I don't like to disappoint my parents. And so just that little talk. Gotcha. Yep. Nah, I did better.

SPEAKER_06

I just, I just, I wasn't going to summer school. No, no.

SPEAKER_03

And then one time I paid for summer school because our government teacher at our high school, they just talked about how awful it was and how awful he was. You could go. You could pay to go? Uh-huh. So I paid to take government in summer school because summer school is easier. And so I did government in summer school, so I could just go. And I did another class like that. And that's one reason also why I was able to graduate a semester earlier.

SPEAKER_06

We probably had that, but I know it wasn't spoken to, uh, I mean, um made known to the black kids. Uh-huh. Because I had, I took all, I'm talking about full credit hours every time. And I graduated when everybody else did. You know what I'm saying? And I do know one year I wanted to go to some school and couldn't because they said you didn't fail anything. So I was like, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03

Oh no, you couldn't. And um I remember as we got close to the semester and I was like, oh, I'm out. Because I didn't sign up for any classes. And I remember my school counselor who never ever, that's the first time I ever seen that woman was trying to talk me into staying.

SPEAKER_06

Did y'all summer school combine like other high schools?

SPEAKER_03

Mm-hmm. It was a certain well, there were, I don't know if there's one location or multiple. Yeah, we had to But yeah, there was a certain location.

SPEAKER_06

That's where I wanted to go.

SPEAKER_03

So you had to be able to drive.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, oh my god, well, we had bus.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, we didn't have buses.

SPEAKER_06

So all my boys was like, man, we get to go with them girls from Fair Hope and Death. I was like, I'm going to summer school. And they told me I couldn't go.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, yeah. You had to be able to drive your parents drop you off um for summer school.

SPEAKER_06

So Oh, yeah, no, we we were bus.

SPEAKER_03

We didn't have that. But I do think, I do think they need to quit their credit recovery. I it's not um They don't know how to fail anymore. Well, it's not preparing them for um college. Also, they need to feel what it feels like when you don't do what you're supposed to do.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, of course. Of course. Yeah. So false sense of of uh success.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. And thankfully for us, we didn't have that issue with our boys.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Our boys never failed a class.

SPEAKER_06

No, we weren't gonna have it. No.

SPEAKER_03

You know, it was like And we we had to work hard. Yeah, well, Kimani hasn't failed anything in college, but you did you fail anything in the college? Yeah, there I have. No. Yeah, so mine was vice versa. Yeah. And yours was vice versa. Mine was vice versa. Yeah. College, honey, I was doing it. But high school, yeah, there are some classes I failed. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

College, oh yeah. Ooh, boy, when I play in, ooh. Mm-hmm. Hey. Hey.

SPEAKER_03

This one said some uh third, second, third graders who can't tie their shoes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I believe it. Lordy. I believe it. I'm telling you straight, I'm telling you, you'll be my goodness. You'll be surprised. And and then the crazy thing is now some of the stuff these kids can't do in high school is unreal. Like just figuring out different things they can't do.

SPEAKER_03

Well, and I think um, hopefully, like now with the technology, like um in high school, when I was in high school, my parents, I think I've said this before. Like, my par my parents didn't go to college. My brother didn't, I'm the first in my immediate household that went to college. Um, so I didn't know about like what is the purpose of the ACT. I don't feel like somebody explained it well enough. Maybe they did, and I just didn't listen because when they said ACT, I was just kind of like, didn't know what it was. Like, you can talk about it. I'm like, what is it? What's I didn't ask any questions, didn't realize it. And then it was like time for it. And I remember one of my good friends saying, You take an ACT? And I was like, why didn't you take it? And she's like, Why are you going to college? I go, Well, yeah, I'm planning on going to college. And she's like, Well, you need to take ACT. I remember going out the night before and took it, didn't really care about what it was or what the purpose of it was for. And I put little effort into it. And my first when I my first year of college, I had to take two remedial courses. And I was like, What? And I was sitting in those classes, I was like, Who am I in class with? I feel like I'm in sped.

SPEAKER_06

And the lady on my list.

SPEAKER_03

And when I was in the class, and uh, I was in was not. And when I was in the college my first year, the the teacher or professor or whatever, she was like, Now how did you get in here? I go, I don't know. She said, You know you could have tested out. I said, didn't know that either.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

That I could have test tested out because all these things I didn't realize. And so spending that first semester of college taking classes that mean nothing.

SPEAKER_06

And um it's it's just so important. Yeah, people just don't know. Yeah, and that's what I'm saying. It's so important to have people who have done things and and and been in that space. Yeah. Because you you can share. But if you don't know what questions to ask, you'll never ask. And that's why I think it's so important that, right? Really, you know, somebody that knows, like you can have a wealth of knowledge, most of us do. Sometimes you have to volunteer and ask people, what what are you trying to do with your life?

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_06

And who are who's helping you with that? You know, it's start little conversations like that, especially when you're talking with kids and stuff. You know, ACT was coming for us because we were all athletes. Yeah. So it was something that was spoken, you know, about all the time. Yeah, yeah. So we said, oh yeah, so if you at least make a 16, you can get on the props 48. If you make a, I think an 18, you can get a scholarship. Okay. So that's what everybody was like, well, I just did an 18.

SPEAKER_03

I had not a clue of that when I was in um school.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Um But it's a lot of stuff that I did not know about. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03

To me, that's what I feel like when in in um high school, when you what do y'all call it? Uh homeroom. What is it?

SPEAKER_06

What do y'all the oh when they do the character ed? Advisment. Advisment. But it the, you know, home is is rare. Home room is only at the beginning of the semester, and then every other time your homeroom becomes the character education.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. I feel like I know they do the character ed, but I feel like there should be time, and I don't know, maybe y'all do do it. They're supposed to they talk about those things so that kids know.

SPEAKER_06

But if you do it one session and that kid's not in home room, are they kids? Oh, then they miss it. Or the kids on their phone. Or, you know, some teachers just going through the rhythm of everything. Yeah. It's not, you know, it's not really uh hitting home.

SPEAKER_03

One of I have uh one of my clients, she's talking about there's one class she doesn't feel connected in, and um how the teacher makes her feel bad. And I said, Well, do you feel she's like, I said, Do you feel comfortable saying? No way.

SPEAKER_06

Um I understand that too. Yeah, I get that a lot of people say, ask them, ask them.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, ask them. No, you ask them. Yeah, she doesn't feel comfortable. And so I said, Well, she says, but I do have other teachers that I like, and I she says, I know we're not supposed to call teacher friends, but they really are like my teacher friends. I said they're like your trusted adult.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

And um, I said, Well, maybe they can help you. Tell them what you feel, and maybe they could help you figure out a strategy to be more connected or how to, you know, work with it. But um, yeah, I I just thinking of how in those spaces of how they group, like there should be some sort of connection where kids can, I don't know. That if they missed it or if they if they in their phone, well, they feel so connected to the person that they wouldn't dare be on their phone because they want to, you know, engaged.

SPEAKER_06

Hey, it's a habit. Well, that's I know somebody be on their phone at dinner table. And I thought they was connected to me, but I guess something else kids can't do is simple um multiplication.

SPEAKER_03

They don't know two times five.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Because, you know, every every math class now, as soon as you walk in, they tell you to grab your calculator and they allow you to use it. You know, for us, the calculator was your rescue line. But now the calculator is what they try to put in from the jump. Like I have all of my kids that sit with me, I say, you have to write it down. If you do not write the steps down, I'm not helping you.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And they don't like it. But you're helping. Right. And then what happens is when they get down to like question nine, and then I they'll say, Okay, how do I do this? I say, it's just like number three, and I look at the paper, I say, What steps you got to and then they don't. But then the other person say, they just laugh and say, Oh, sh you got your steps. Yep. And they go ahead and write it. And it's just so important to write the steps, but they do not know the basic facts.

SPEAKER_03

No, it's like that boy that I saw on TikTok that he the teacher says, Okay, now you can use your notes for the test. And he turned his notes over. He hadn't written a thing. He went scribbles. And the draw is on the case. Draw is nothing on, nothing to help him with the test. And nothing off.

SPEAKER_06

It was so funny. We did a uh the one class I'm in, the uh environmental science, she was like, you know, we we need to do somebody's grade. I said, Well, look, in zoology, for the quiz, we do open notes. And then for the um test, we do, you get one chance. After they turn the test in, we grade it, and you get one chance to make test corrections. Because sometimes maybe, you know, anxiety or just a you know, flubber or whatever you did. But for the notes, you say, Oh, let's try it. So we told the kids, here's your packet, make sure it's complete, we're gonna check it, and we're same the usual suspects, didn't do it. And and then so I took my group out, which now you got a lot of space, so they can't look over. So, because they sit at the little lab tables. And so she said, when she told them to pull your notes out, and when you turn in um your tests, you turn in your notes. She said, their eyes got so big because they weren't sitting next to that person they could cheat off of and they didn't have no notes.

SPEAKER_00

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

And she said, if you have, if you don't have notes, y'all gonna have to sit somewhere. Like she made them sit somewhere else.

SPEAKER_00

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_06

Only the people that had notes could kind of sit close to each other. And boy, when I tell you them grades were revealing. But the next test, next quiz we had, everybody had their notes, their cook their notes. Yeah. Everybody had their notes. I said, sometimes you have to do little stuff like that. Yeah. Teach them, teach them. Yes.

SPEAKER_03

Teach them, don't let them keep doing it.

Side Eye Power Trips Gratitude Plans

SPEAKER_06

All right. Um let's move on. To side eye. Yep, side eye. Because today, we tonight we are chaperoning the prom.

SPEAKER_03

Did it?

SPEAKER_06

Get to see these fancy dresses and stuff.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, I got to see Miss Kimmy's um um CeC. Yep, her dress is big. Hey, I bet it is.

SPEAKER_06

I bet it is. All right, so my side eye of the week is just the way uh information was reflected. You know, and uh try to play me like I didn't hear what I heard. That's my side out of the week. Yeah. You know, is when people talk to you, tell you something, and then try to say, Oh, I don't think you understood. No. Oh no. I'm very intelligent. I understood exactly what was said. And so uh that was my side without giving too much detail. That's my side of the week. I tell y'all, probably in June, if it if it changes. If it changed, I'd say name it everything. Yeah. Um, what do you have? What's your side of the week?

SPEAKER_03

Um, um, well, I think my side eye, I think my side eye is gonna be people that are hungry with power. So like they end up changing or shifting things just as a a control thing to have control and um and then and then it's no reason.

SPEAKER_06

And so just to show you that I can.

SPEAKER_03

Yes. And I'm not oppositional defined, but if it don't make sense, guess who ain't doing it? You ain't oppositional defined. But if it if it to it has to make sense to you, to me.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm gonna ask why.

SPEAKER_06

Why, yeah, yeah. Why is it that way? We will do that.

SPEAKER_03

I'm gonna ask. Even at my job, they know if anybody gonna ask why.

SPEAKER_06

Even if you don't ask, them eyes.

SPEAKER_03

It's saying why.

SPEAKER_06

And that this this part right here, I don't know what you call this little muscle right here with with the lip go like.

SPEAKER_03

I can't help it. It's got to make sense to me. And if it doesn't make sense, guess who ain't doing it? This sister, unless you say you got to do it or you're gonna be fired. I know that's right. Then if you say that, then I'll go on to do it as long as it aligns with my beliefs, my values, and my ethics. But if it doesn't have anything to do with those three, hmm.

SPEAKER_01

Bye, bye, bye. I ain't doing it.

SPEAKER_06

All right. And I do have another side eye. Why this joker left the garage door open twice? Who? Uh, who else?

SPEAKER_03

Your child. Yes. When?

SPEAKER_06

Um, in the morning? No, I don't know when it was when I come home. And it had to be for a few hours because I know one time I remember it was when I come from the gym. Oh. And I'm like, you know what, and that one little corner of my garage is horrible. It looks a mess. Just look a mess. Just a corner. No, I'm saying that's the only part you could really see. Oh, okay. That looks a mess, yes. And I was like, oh my God. I said, boy, you got these folk ready. H-O-A-S.

SPEAKER_03

I wish they would.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, you shy. Okay, what are you grateful for?

SPEAKER_03

Oh, oh gosh, there's so much to be grateful for. What am I choosing? What are you grateful for within the last 24 hours? The last 24 hours?

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_03

Grateful that Keemani made it home safely um and was able to make it to the job fair today. And I am also grateful for um I yeah, I do, I know many people, I don't know. I'm just gonna say, I do believe the Lord speaks to me. What did he say? I can't say what he said because it's very specific about one of my clients.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, okay. Well, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

But he's but I feel like he's because I always pray for him to speak to me.

SPEAKER_06

You grateful that you you on the main line with me. Yes.

SPEAKER_03

I always pray that he will speak to and through me. And I just feel like that's what he did on yesterday. And it was it was spot on. Spot on. So I'm grateful for the Lord speaking to and through make. To and through.

SPEAKER_06

What I'm grateful for, I am grateful for opportunities. So, like when, you know, the news was given to me, I was like, All right, I'm good. Because I got other things that I actually do.

SPEAKER_00

Yes.

SPEAKER_06

And I'm grateful that um my name is good out here in these streets. It is. You know what I'm saying? So it's like no matter like when I today at the um at the um job fair, running into coaches, coach, what's going on, man? What are you doing in line? I'm saying stuff. Well, we don't, but you know for a fact if we, you know, just like that, like anything. So it's just people that I've coached against and stuff like that who respect me, um, and just it's it's good. And I'm grateful that your name's good in these streets too, because when I shared your name, you know, people lit up, you know. Oh the old ladies, they lit up. And so, oh yeah, we're trying to get in our bridge. But it was good in these streets too. So I'm grateful that the hair name is solid.

SPEAKER_03

And I told my child, I said, listen, key mine, there are some people that I have grown and built relationships with. I was like, when you go to school, I told him specifically the schools that I knew admin or I knew people there. Just say, you know, I came because uh my mom, Lucretia Hare, she said, I said, just say it. And I said, because connections are what gets you in the door. Connections are what will get you the interview. That's right. You got to let people know who you know.

SPEAKER_06

You gotta connect, man. You gotta connect.

SPEAKER_03

Why would you not? And that thing, y'all.

SPEAKER_06

Uh oh.

SPEAKER_03

He did not connect. And so Lord.

SPEAKER_06

What are you looking forward to? Let me wrap it up.

SPEAKER_03

Okay, okay, okay. Let's see. What am I looking forward to? I'm actually looking forward to spring break. We don't have anything. So every I've been thinking about what we can do, what can we do? Because we want to do something. Um, I was thinking about Callaway Gardens.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Because we hadn't been there. But that'd be like a nice getaway, and they have like nature trails the wall. Like that might just be a nice kind of like reset, calm. So I thought about Callaway Gardens.

SPEAKER_06

Everybody, I know it. We can look at it.

SPEAKER_03

That's not a place to take kids.

SPEAKER_06

But these people like this educated, they're gonna be gone. And it's small little uh the cottages.

SPEAKER_03

It is a small little thing. So anywho, I'm just trying to think about something we could go and and and do for uh for spring break because we hadn't planned anything, but I do I did make sure the Sunday, Monday, Tuesday we have available.

SPEAKER_06

Okay. Well, I'm looking forward to whatever my next is. You know, I don't know what this week is gonna, this week's gonna be interesting, I know. Um, because you saw your people. Yes. And one of them said, call me. I say, all right, I'm in line, but you know, I couldn't call you in line.

SPEAKER_03

From your place?

SPEAKER_06

Yes. Yeah. So he's like, you saw me in line. I was come come. And I'm like, oh, no, okay, let me talk to you.

SPEAKER_03

They're gonna be singing the what's the name Janice song. Don't know what you got till it's gone.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but uh, it's all good. But I'm looking forward to um we're supposed to have some good weather. And maybe this week I'm gonna take my motorcycle to the um thing because I want to get it uh I mean even oh before you drive. Yes, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_03

I've because well you're gonna have to drive it there, but yeah.

SPEAKER_06

My wheel, like I said, um I had those tires are the same tires I had from they were brand new, and it's 10 years old. And you're not supposed to drive, you know, tires like.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, you need to get it ready so we can drive in the mountains like Prince and Apollonia.

SPEAKER_06

I'm telling you, and we are going to. We're gonna actually take a backpack trip where we stay in a hotel and everything like that.

SPEAKER_03

And I'm gonna be Apollonia.

Ask Us Anything And Sign Off

SPEAKER_06

That's right. We're gonna go to the winery, all that, and have a good little time. But that's it. And uh looking forward to the prompt tonight in a few hours. We actually gotta hurry up because I need to figure out what I'm gonna do. You gotta be there at six. I gotta figure out in an hour what I'm wearing. An hour. Yeah. So I think I know what I'm wearing. It ain't a big deal. Me and then I'm wearing a button-up shirt, regular button-up shirt. Okay. And we're gonna figure out what we're gonna do afterwards. Okay. Just hang out a little bit. All right. Uh so ladies and gentlemen, as always, we love you guys. Thank y'all for um hitting us up. If there are any topics that y'all would like for us to discuss and address, let me know. There's one story that I have to tell you guys.

SPEAKER_01

What?

SPEAKER_03

Well, you can't tell them today because our time is up.

SPEAKER_06

Listen, it's a story about my childhood.

SPEAKER_03

And you just remembered it?

SPEAKER_06

No. I I I want to find out. It's it's it's crazy as heck. Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Well, that'll be next time.

SPEAKER_06

It is a great story. It's a stupid story. Okay. It's one of them stories that if me and my brothers were sitting here telling you, uh-huh, y'all would be laughing so hard, but we couldn't really tell it how we want to tell it. Okay. But it's a it's it's a crazy story. But I want to tell it eventually. Okay. And I just keep thinking about it. But um, thank y'all for supporting us. But if there's anything y'all want us to talk about, uh if even if it's serious, you got any advice you know y'all want us to give, you know, any lovers' advice, any parenting advice, uh-huh, any friend advice, any advice. Yes, anything. Any anything, please reach out in the comments. Y'all have been doing a great job with commenting. We appreciate that. I'm gonna do a better job of putting more clips. Some of the clips probably won't have the little extra videos in them, just so we can get them out there. Yeah. Because it does take time. Um, but we we really appreciate everybody. So um, this is the Refreshingly Normal Podcast with your host Keith Luff and uh Lucretia Creed. And we really appreciate you guys, and we will see you when we see you. Thank you. Peace.

SPEAKER_04

The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.