Call Him Daddy Then Call Yourself Grandma

Graduation weekend can be joyful and heavy at the same time, especially when you’re an educator saying goodbye to kids you’ve poured into for years. We’re talking end-of-school-year emotions, why graduation hits different when parents tell you their child is better because you showed up, and how it feels to move on after a rough couple of weeks. We also get real about the different kinds of impact you make as a classroom teacher versus supporting students in special education, and why sometimes the best leadership happens from the shadows.

Then we jump into a family money story that turns into a full-blown student loan boundary lesson. A couple creates a scholarship fund for eight nieces and nephews with clear conditions: in-state public school, a 3.0 GPA, and a nine-semester limit. One niece ignores all of it, racks up massive college debt, and the family still demands $100,000 after the fact. We break down entitlement, fairness, and why “help” stops being help when people treat it like they’re owed.

To close, we hit a few AITA moments that are funny but telling: the bedroom nickname debate where “no” should be enough, and the girls trip where someone tries to hand off parenting responsibilities to the whole group. If you’ve ever struggled with boundaries, family expectations, or just needed a laugh after a long week, this one’s for you. Subscribe, share with a friend, and leave a review with your take: where do you draw the line?

Don't forget to Like, Comment, Share, and Subscribe.

Thank you for listening!

Transcript

Welcome Back And Summer Break

SPEAKER_00 0:03

The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_02 0:23

Welcome back, everyone. Thank you for tuning in to the Refreshingly Normal Podcast. I am Keefla.

SPEAKER_04 0:29

I am Karee. And we are the Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_02 0:37

I already said that.

SPEAKER_04 0:38

You paused. Oh, what'd you say? Oh, we are. I'm sorry. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:43

Yeah. So uh she said she read it, y'all. We're gonna see. We're gonna see if she read it. So it is what it is. All right. Um, summer break is here for some of us, and yours is approaching very fast.

SPEAKER_04 0:55

It is, it is.

SPEAKER_02 0:57

Don't say nothing. You make it I'm not gonna say nothing, huh? Yeah, you're making the big books to work a little longer, so hey, it is what it is. But um,

Therapy Work And Family Graduation

SPEAKER_02 1:06

how was your week?

SPEAKER_04 1:07

Um, my week was pretty good.

SPEAKER_02 1:11

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:12

I had my one last restorative conference um that I had to do with a group of uh teachers, and that went really well. And then I had clients all week.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:26

Only one cancellation due to um running late because they were still braiding their cousin's hair. Come on now, and I was like, okay, yeah, um, but anywho, working with my clients, um, some of them, it's gotten to our three-month mark. And so give it give it, I have to go through and figure out like, where are we in our therapy in regards to our goals and re-evaluating treatment plans? And do I think that what my provisional diagnosis is actually what the client may be um, I guess, is that the appropriate diagnosis?

SPEAKER_05 2:14

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04 2:15

And me kind of looking at it and deciding that, and then deciding how we met goals, do we need to switch up goals or keep working on the same specific goals? Um, and so just doing all of that with them this week, and then um had an opportunity to have a meeting with um a school leader to kind of talk through some things, and that went really well. Um, I had a plan or goal in mind that I was hoping would happen, um, and it did. And so I felt really good about that um because I just felt like that was the thing that was going to be able to create the biggest change. Um so, anyways, I was really excited about that, and so that was the week. And Saturday had four clients from nine to one, had one nine, ten, eleven, and twelve. And so did that on Saturday, and then our nephew graduated this weekend um from high school. So um, in-laws came into town Friday night. Um, and Saturday, you were you're limited on tickets, so we didn't get to see the graduation in person. We got to watch it at home on the live stream, on the live stream, but actually the view is much better than being at the facility because we did that with our boys, and I was like, man, this watching it from home looks you get really upfront, yeah, a good, good view of it all. So we watched it from home, and so we're really excited for him, and then today got to go out to dinner with the family. Everybody showed up and supported him, and it was a fun evening at Russons in Buckhead, and the people there are very, very, very nice, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:06

Very extremely enjoy their own. Check it out.

SPEAKER_04 4:10

Yeah, the Russons and Buckhead, and they gave brought us all over Saki to cheers him, and yeah, it was really a good time. So um, that was my week. It was pretty full. What about your week?

Wrapping The School Year Strong

SPEAKER_02 4:25

My week, we we wrapped it up. You know, we had um school-wise, it was half a day. Um, you know, Monday, half a day, all periods, Tuesday, first period, fine, first and second finals, Wednesday, third and fourth finals, and that was it. Graduation was on Thursday. Um, it was good to see the kids. Um you know, some of my girls that uh coached for flag flag football with. That was um, you know, of course, you know, it was our duties to do to go.

SPEAKER_01 4:56

To graduation school.

SPEAKER_02 4:57

You know, as the teachers have to go, but um I was conflicted because one of the other teachers, well, actually a few of the teachers that weren't coming back to that school did not show up.

SPEAKER_04 5:07

Oh, they didn't show up? No, they didn't show up. They probably were surprised as you showed up.

SPEAKER_02 5:10

Yeah, they were. Yeah, people were, I'm surprised you here. I said, uh I said, to be honest, I'm not here for the school, I'm here for my kids.

SPEAKER_05 5:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:18

I said, I would have I would have tried to come anyway. I said, matter of fact, next year, I'm gonna hopefully I can get some tickets to come so that I can see two of my girls that I coached in flag football. Um, and it was good to see them at the end. Because even like some of my baseball players that I coached, um, it was good to see them graduate um afterwards. It was it was fulfilling because uh I had great response from parents telling me that they were so happy that I was in their child's life. Um, you know, I was a father figure to many of them, the girls and the guys. Um, you know, but I coached girls' flag football, so uh it was that they were teary, real teary. And um it was uh very, very uh uh heartfelt, you know, to receive the kind words that I received because it this was a rough week, a rough couple of weeks for me. Um I feel like I've been beat down for no reason. And so to hear those uh words from the parents and from my kids and to know that it was genuine, you know, was um what I needed at the time. And uh, you know, it's uh it's a good it was a you know, it was a good week in that in that regard. And then, you know, we wrapped up, cleaned out my um office and stuff. On um Friday, I got a little plaque, you know, they give teachers plaques uh that have been with you know the school for a while.

SPEAKER_05 6:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:50

And um, you know, got my plaque, said my goodbyes, and got in the car and rolled off, man.

SPEAKER_04 6:58

Did you cry?

SPEAKER_02 6:59

Nah.

Where Teachers Make The Biggest Impact

SPEAKER_04 7:00

Can I say, do you think in your role, like in SPED? I know you out you as a PE in health, you see lots of students, and maybe specifically maybe like a good number of students. Do you feel like in your role as a SPED teacher the interactions were a little different? Did you feel like you made more of an impact in that role or in PE your health? What did you think?

SPEAKER_02 7:22

Um I would probably I had number wise, I had more impact in in when I had my own classroom.

SPEAKER_01 7:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 7:32

Because I was with every child.

SPEAKER_01 7:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 7:35

Instead, you know, like for example, in geometry, I only had three kids that really I worked with. You know what I mean? On a regular.

SPEAKER_04 7:42

But you don't have to be a kid. Yeah, I work, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:44

I work, I worked with, but there are some kids that I didn't.

SPEAKER_04 7:47

Okay, you didn't talk about it. Didn't have no, yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 7:50

You know what I mean? Um, I mean, probably I'll say like 50% of the class that I really didn't have to have no interaction with.

SPEAKER_04 7:58

Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 7:59

A lot of times you can't because you're helping.

SPEAKER_04 8:01

Yeah, you're babies.

SPEAKER_02 8:02

Yeah, you you're busy.

SPEAKER_04 8:03

No.

SPEAKER_02 8:04

But when I had my own classroom, every single student.

SPEAKER_05 8:07

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 8:07

You know, especially like in my body sculpting class when they was exercising, every single student I was teaching them proper form and all that stuff and talking to them, motivating them, encouraging them, and all that. Um, which is why a lot of them, when they found out I wasn't going to be in class, that class it was about 20 kids dropped. You know what I'm seeing what I'm saying? So um, I was impactful, I think just as a in period, you know, regardless of my role, I was impactful. But like I said, when I was in PE and health, the kids that were in my classroom, you know, were because we talked on a regular every day.

SPEAKER_05 8:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:48

And I was the focal point in talking. So if I gave a lecture, I put familiar experiences.

SPEAKER_04 8:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:55

So that made them know me more.

SPEAKER_04 8:56

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, but kind of like how I do in my trainings. Like that makes people connect with you better. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:02

But you know, like in Sed, I'm not the teacher of record, so I have to let they did all the talking.

SPEAKER_01 9:07

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 9:07

Only time I said anything was when they came over or when I went and said, You good? Let's let's what what do we need? Let's let's get on it, you know, like that. So I was in the shadows a little bit.

SPEAKER_04 9:18

Oh, that has to be thinking about something else. We'll talk about that later. Yeah, I was in the shadows.

SPEAKER_02 9:22

Yeah, so a lot of a lot of it was um um and and and and you know, for some people, they that's hard for them to do. Um, but you know, I'm like, whoever is in front of me, whether it's one or a thousand, I'm gonna do what I need to do.

SPEAKER_03 9:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:42

But some people don't like that. You know what I mean? They gotta be forefront. Like, I can definitely, I'm a great, I'm a leader by nature, but I'm also an amazing follower because I want the people that I'm with to look good. So I'm gonna do what I can do to make my team look good. Yeah. That's just who I am.

SPEAKER_05 10:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:01

Um, so, but it was a it was a cool, it was a cool um, I guess you can say a wrap-up of um 12 amazing years at the high school that I was at.

SPEAKER_04 10:14

Wow, I don't think I've ever been at a school for that long.

SPEAKER_02 10:19

No?

SPEAKER_04 10:19

That's a long time. That's the longest for you.

SPEAKER_02 10:22

Yeah. I mean, this is the longest county.

SPEAKER_04 10:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:24

This is the longest county, you know, I've been in the county um for this long because 13 years in the county.

SPEAKER_04 10:30

Yeah, that's a long time.

SPEAKER_02 10:31

And then um, but it was uh it, you know, it was it was uh it's tough because I love those kids. Those parents love me down. Like I said, that graduation was um when Chizoma mom and Chizoma hugged me, and their family like gave me love, I almost broke down. You know, I was like, because they their love was like real love. Genuine. You know, yeah, my little Nigerian family. And they was like, oh, I was oh man. Yeah, when the when when Chizoma's mom and and and and Chizoma hug me, it was because she's always been, you know, one who was like just right here, you know. So I know when Khalia probably graduates, it's gonna be different. And Zoe, the same thing with Zoe, when Zoe's mom told me, because you know I escorted her homecoming.

SPEAKER_04 11:21

Yeah. And she said, Did Zoe graduate this year?

SPEAKER_02 11:24

She's like, and no, you know, there I remember Ain't nobody like, you know, like you. I was like, man, I appreciate it. And um, you know, just hearing those words meant something. Because with Zoe, she was in my class, but it our impact was out of the classroom.

SPEAKER_05 11:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 11:41

It was more so me always guiding and being there when she needed at the you know, um, but you know, that's it. But uh I appreciate my time there. I appreciate my family. Yeah. And um, you know, it's on to the next chapter. But uh like with anything, for example, when they was in with um Westchester in California, you know, Britney's is still part of the family.

SPEAKER_04 12:05

You know, um, you know, I mean, even like And there it was different because like back then it was like our students came to our houses. I mean, like in the early 2000s, yeah, we had those things where our students come to our houses, our students, you know, it was just different than what it is now.

SPEAKER_02 12:22

What it is now, right, right.

SPEAKER_04 12:23

Um, and so you know, it helped to maintain or make you closer, you know, to those specific students.

SPEAKER_02 12:31

And I mean, God knows, like, if we would have had time, you know, I could have, you know, invited Zoe and her mom, you know, Chizoma and her mom, you know, Khalia and her mom, her mom and dad, you know, you know, because every time you saw them every time.

SPEAKER_01 12:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 12:49

You know, yeah, all the time. You know, we and so, but it was like I said, then it was like like it was different times, but now, I mean, it's the same thing. We the relationship was still there.

SPEAKER_04 13:00

Yeah, you know. I just think of I'm thinking about like then for me, like specific students that would come to my house and like go on vacation with us and um take out to eat and stay the night. I mean, like all those things were things that were caring teachers, for caring teachers. Nobody thought it was weird or why.

SPEAKER_02 13:26

Nope, at all.

SPEAKER_04 13:27

Um, and those students, my students now to this day, I still talk to them and um and that sort of thing. Um explanation. No, no, and even like you know, Tanisha coming out here and um just spending a f little while with us out here because she just wanted to see the house, our house so bad and spend some time, and me driving her all the way from East Atlanta to come here and stay for a few hours and then driving her all the way back, and um just to give her an experience and something new. But yeah, yeah, those things, you know, we were able to do. And um now it's just everything is like so the world makes everybody so guarded, guarded, and I understand why I get it because some people don't have good intentions. Yeah, they don't and so you know, you are protective of your children and all of the things, and so I I absolutely without a doubt, I do completely understand that. But yeah, so some of those connections we have with our students are um were just such deep connections, and and that's and that that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 14:34

So when the parents did feel that way, even like when Cameron's mom wanted me to sign the book, and she was like, You gotta understand how important you are to my son, you know, um, and and for me it's just that's my everyday. That's like putting on my shoes, putting on pants. I ain't leave never leaving out the house without no pants on. So that means in every situation, I'm going to be the same way to your child. You know, and then right when I was getting ready to go to the parking lot, the boy was like, You first one believed in me. I said, God, dog, why y'all doing me like this? You know, I'm I'm I'm trying to hurry up, get to my car so I don't get emotional. And then you're gonna tell your mama, mom, he's the first one to believe in me. I said, Oh Lord. And you know, you know, um, but I believe I do think that there's gonna be a moment where I sit and probably shed a couple tears and whatever. And I hope that I do, because I need a release. Um you know, but I'm so I'm not gonna say guarded. I yes I am so guarded that it's almost like you can't for whatever reason.

SPEAKER_04 15:45

Um that's not healthy.

SPEAKER_02 15:46

It's not, but um, you know. Like when I did cry one of my girls like this is senior night, you know, because I like I love those girls. You know, I always want a daughter. Um and God gave us several.

SPEAKER_04 16:01

Cinnabon. He is not accepting you as his daughter.

SPEAKER_02 16:05

No, and she's a dog. She's right here. She's a dog. Humans.

SPEAKER_04 16:09

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 16:09

And so, you know, that which is, you know, um, which is why God has always put young girls in our lives, period. You know what I mean? He's always put them in our lives. From the jump with Bren Yell. Oh yeah, and then we had our.

SPEAKER_04 16:28

What did they call Brand? No, she wasn't Foo. What did they call Brain Yell? I can't even think of it now.

SPEAKER_02 16:32

Fo Fusha or Foos, Foos, something like that. Yeah. Yeah, it was something like that. But anyway, um, yeah, okay, let me jump off of that. We can be on that forever.

SPEAKER_04 16:41

But yes, and we go ahead and say Britney.

SPEAKER_02 16:44

No, I said Britney. Yeah, because we after we when we moved to Cali, we got Britney.

SPEAKER_04 16:49

Yeah, I'm sure you didn't.

SPEAKER_02 16:50

Yeah. Same thing. Lights, little red.

SPEAKER_04 16:53

Oh, red hair. That is so funny.

SPEAKER_02 16:55

Brandil, Britney to our kahari.

SPEAKER_04 16:59

That is so funny that both of them were red hair, same skin color, sandy hair, freckles. That's funny.

SPEAKER_02 17:08

And then we got Kahari. Yeah, that's so funny.

SPEAKER_04 17:10

I didn't even know.

SPEAKER_02 17:11

Well, I ain't gonna give y'all no daughter, so here goes same. Yeah, they match.

SPEAKER_01 17:16

They match.

SPEAKER_02 17:17

That's all you're gonna get. So,

When Students Become Family

SPEAKER_02 17:20

all right, let's jump into it. So uh let's do you wanna do that story about since we're on the topic of graduation.

SPEAKER_04 17:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 17:28

In colleges, we had a story that I found. All right, and um, this story is about a couple who kind of did well off for themselves. It was an uncle and aunt, right?

SPEAKER_04 17:42

The rich auntie and uncle.

SPEAKER_02 17:44

That's who people think we are, minus the rich part.

SPEAKER_04 17:49

We're rich in life.

SPEAKER_02 17:51

That's right, and we are rich in life and laughter because if anybody asks you who they are, auntie and uncle of choice when it comes to, I ain't gonna say favorite. I'm just saying of choice when it comes to knowing we're gonna laugh alien, laugh. We're gonna have a good time, we're gonna joke with you all the time and give you some rightful advice. It's gonna be us. You know what I'm saying? Um so this story is titled, Couple Refuse to Pay $100,000 of niece's student loans after she ignored their scholarship condition.

SPEAKER_04 18:29

Conditions.

SPEAKER_02 18:30

That's a key word. So in this story, okay, yeah, a couple refused to pay $100,000 of their niece student loans, which sparked a family dispute. All right. So the couple claimed to be from a multi-generational poverty background and claimed to be the first in their family to attend college. However, after much hard work, they entered a financially stable period in their lives. They were also able to generate enough cash flow to not just fund themselves but also hand out scholarships to their eight nieces and nephews. However, there were strict conditions that had to be met before earning any of their money.

SPEAKER_04 19:17

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 19:18

Only in state universities or public schools. Okay? Nothing private or out of state. A 3.0 GPA, and finally, their courses must have a nine semester limit. That means they can't keep going taking a hundred years to graduate.

SPEAKER_04 19:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:42

You gotta be done in nine semesters.

SPEAKER_04 19:44

Yes. So nine semesters is four and a half. Yes. Oh, they even gave them a little wiggle. Exactly. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 19:50

Exactly. Okay. So about five years ago, one of their nieces wanted them to pay for her dream school, which was in Florida, which was out of state.

SPEAKER_04 20:01

Well, she already messed up.

SPEAKER_02 20:02

Boom.

SPEAKER_04 20:03

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 20:03

Since it went against one of the three conditions, the couple decided to counter the offer. Okay. They said, well, hold up. Instead of Florida, how about you pick an in-state college which we are more than willing to pay for? However, it didn't go down very well with the girl's parents. And it ended in a family dispute. All right. So the uncle was like, a huge fight ensued. Her parents haven't spoken to us since and actively badmouthed us to everyone. Like, oh, they got all that money and they don't know how to act now.

SPEAKER_04 20:37

Well, that, well, I'm I'll wait till you get done, then I'll say my part.

SPEAKER_02 20:40

Okay, okay, okay. So Denise attended her dream school.

SPEAKER_04 20:44

I need to be writing notes.

SPEAKER_02 20:46

And five years later, she graduated with the 2.0 GPA.

SPEAKER_04 20:52

Oh, that don't sound like 3.0.

SPEAKER_02 20:54

And she was still went to her dream school, which was in Florida.

SPEAKER_04 20:57

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 20:57

So that's two. Okay. And how many years?

SPEAKER_04 21:01

Five.

SPEAKER_02 21:01

How many was the nine semesters?

SPEAKER_04 21:03

Uh, four and a half.

SPEAKER_02 21:04

So she missed all three conditions.

SPEAKER_04 21:06

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 21:07

All right. So it took her five years to finish her BA in communications. Ain't nothing wrong with taking a long time, but when there are stipulations involved.

SPEAKER_04 21:16

Just like if you lose your scholarship because you don't meet the Yeah, you don't finish in time.

SPEAKER_02 21:21

Just like an athlete, you lose eligibility. Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_04 21:23

That's right.

SPEAKER_02 21:24

So when she did all that, she had about $300,000 in student loans. All right. So she finally graduated, had a graduation party, and then the uncle and aunt almost skipped out because that the family dynamics were still, you know, in disarray. They were still arguing. All right. But however, the uncle's mother-in-law convinced them to attend. And it appears that there was still bad blood between them because things got ugly, so they say, the moment that they walked in. All right. So another fight, well, not fight. You know, people fight, some are arguing, broke out with an unlikely demand from the niece's parents. So they said they you guys should pay $100,000 of our niece's loan.

SPEAKER_04 22:13

Of our daughters?

SPEAKER_02 22:14

I mean, of our daughter's loans, I'm sorry. So it was like, hey, y'all know what? Since y'all didn't pay for her college like y'all did everybody else, y'all can at least pay $100,000 of her loans. But apparently, the parents recalled that the other four family members who had been sponsored by her and her wife forgot the fact that they did the conditions. Exactly. So the parents begin to argue continuously, and everybody knew that it was unfair.

SPEAKER_04 22:45

What do I have to argue about?

SPEAKER_02 22:47

Exactly. But their whole thing was, well, everybody else got free rides. Why didn't our daughter get one? I said their daughter was left with a large loan to pay off.

SPEAKER_04 22:57

And that was her and her parents' fault.

SPEAKER_02 22:59

It was. It exactly was.

SPEAKER_04 23:01

You know, and then they were trying to, first of all, the idea of that their stipulations had reasons. For one, the end state, because they knew the cost would be cheaper. That's right. They knew that their goal and what they had planned, which they did not have to, was to fund the college of all of their nieces and nephews.

SPEAKER_01 23:26

Eight of them.

SPEAKER_04 23:27

If they allowed all of them to go to school wherever they wanted to go to, all willy-nilly, and finish whenever they wanted to finish, they would not be able to fund that and be able to fund everybody. Correct. And so when they put this whole scholarship idea together, they were thinking of okay, how much can we afford for each niece and nephew to be able to go? If I have eight, okay, that's $800,000. We got that. We've already put it to the side in this IRA or in this whatever college fund that is

The Family Scholarship With Conditions

SPEAKER_04 24:01

specifically for our nieces and nephews. They put it together the way that it's supposed to be. And the stipulation and the guidelines was to encourage that they would finish.

SPEAKER_01 24:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 24:12

Um, and so it's just like any other scholarship. If you have a scholarship that says you got to maintain a 2.5 or 3.5 to be able to get it. In order to get the hope, there are education. You can't go to the hope people and say, hey, listen, my baby wants to go to Alabama State. Oh, I'm sorry. Well, they I hope you can pay for it. Yes, I hope you can pay for it because a hope scholarship don't pay for that. It's just the same thing. But those parents Ungrateful. Ungrateful for one. They think, oh, they got all this money. They're gonna do it. On top of that, what about the cousins, the nieces and nephews that went to school prior to that that settled with us?

SPEAKER_02 24:55

Got up, gave up their dream school.

SPEAKER_04 24:56

Gave up their dream school because listen, I'd rather graduate. And then also, well, I'm saying to graduate debt-free and have a free education for one. Two, the aunt and uncle call themselves setting them up for success. You go to college, you leave college with zero debt. Yeah. So the idea that everything that they did was out of the love and future of their nieces and daughters.

SPEAKER_02 25:24

They wasn't finished loving. They was about to show us some more love.

SPEAKER_04 25:28

What else were they getting ready to do?

SPEAKER_02 25:29

Oh, so so after about 10 minutes of arguing with the parents about it being a free ride, all right, the couple walked out. Yeah. The uncle and aunt, they just said, we can't do it.

SPEAKER_04 25:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:42

All right. But they walked out with a huge a huge decision to make because normally they give every graduate $5,000 cash, not a loan, but $5,000 cash gift. All right. So when they walked out, they was, you know, the wife and the uncle was trying to say, okay, should we give them the gift? Should we mail the gift after the ugly argument? Or should we just be like, you know, forget it?

SPEAKER_01 26:11

But what did they do?

SPEAKER_02 26:13

The wife was adamant over not budging after how things had recently ended. So she was like, yo, they don't need it. No, she, we was getting ready to get them the cash gift. And after they kept doing all that stuff, now you don't get nothing.

SPEAKER_04 26:28

Yeah. Cause it's almost like what they don't understand is if I set these guidelines up that in state um 3.0, four and a half years, if first of all, as soon as you said out of state, then what you said to me was we don't want the family scholarship fund.

SPEAKER_01 26:46

Right.

SPEAKER_04 26:47

So what might have been a good idea, and hopefully they don't have this experience with another niece or nephew, but what maybe is a good idea is that once they decide the out-of-state school, I mean, you don't want to document it, but just so that they can put it from brain to paper, um, saying that you are signing here saying that you do not accept our $100,000 family scholarship because you have chosen to an out-of-state school, and the guidelines for this scholarship is so then when it comes to trying to have an argument about it, here's what you signed.

SPEAKER_05 27:26

Yeah, it's crazy you didn't gotta do that.

SPEAKER_04 27:29

Because for any um person with a brain, and we've said what the stipulations are, and every other niece and nephew and family have followed the guidelines, we're not budget for you. So to me, there's a lot of entitlement, a lot of um spoiled yes. Um, and I would love to know, I'm very interested to see this uh niece is her parent the baby of the family. Because it sounds like a baby of the family.

SPEAKER_02 28:12

Sound like baby energy, baby family energy.

SPEAKER_04 28:14

Sounds like a baby of family move.

SPEAKER_02 28:15

But I should still get it anyway.

SPEAKER_04 28:17

Yeah, because they have been used to it being that way.

SPEAKER_02 28:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 28:22

So it sounds like a baby of the family move. And I'm very interested in is this parent the baby of the family? And thinking that things will be altered and adjusted to satisfy the baby of the family. And so for a baby of the family, that's how everything always works for you. When somebody finally says, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 28:44

Oh, yes, you but you you must don't know. I'll get everything I want.

SPEAKER_04 28:48

Yeah. So the audacity of it. And then just to think, now your child has $300,000. Is that how much they say? How much they say?

SPEAKER_02 28:58

$300,000 in that.

SPEAKER_04 28:58

$300,000 in student loan or whatever school day.

SPEAKER_02 29:03

They got what business communications, I said, I think it was.

SPEAKER_04 29:06

A little business communication. Okay. Anyways, they're gonna leave. They could have left, I'm sorry, college with zero dollars owed.

SPEAKER_02 29:18

Zero.

SPEAKER_04 29:19

Zero to three dollars.

SPEAKER_02 29:20

Plus five thousand dollars once they came to the graduation party.

SPEAKER_04 29:24

Now they got three hundred. Oh, and and no cash.

SPEAKER_02 29:29

Three hundred and no cash.

SPEAKER_04 29:31

That was a poor decision on their part.

SPEAKER_02 29:34

Very much so.

SPEAKER_04 29:34

Oh man.

SPEAKER_02 29:35

I wonder I wonder what what order of the graduation of graduating nieces and nephews were they out of the eight.

SPEAKER_04 29:42

Yeah, yeah. I wonder.

SPEAKER_02 29:44

You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04 29:45

I wonder. I um I mean, I wish I would have had an uncle and Amy that said they were gonna pay for all my school.

SPEAKER_02 29:53

In state? Oh boy. Shoot, they could have said in county. I would have took my butt right there to Falkland State Community College. Played baseball there.

SPEAKER_04 30:04

That was for me. I would have, I they would have, I graduated four and a half years, 3.18, and then if it was Kansas, I was in Kansas. I would have like no.

SPEAKER_02 30:14

Well, I would have I would have lost the money because it took me longer. And the first GPA.

SPEAKER_04 30:19

But maybe you wouldn't have if if you knew if I would have gone within. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 30:25

Because I could have chosen any school I wanted to, and I would have went to the Alabama State. They would have heard of it. Yeah, it would probably either would have been Alabama State, Tuskegee, or AM. Yeah. One of those three.

SPEAKER_04 30:34

Well, not because it's the it had to be public.

SPEAKER_02 30:37

Oh, that's right. So not Tuskegee. It's not as practical. Not Tuskegee. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:41

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 30:42

Well, it still would have been, no, it probably wouldn't too much.

SPEAKER_04 30:45

It cost too much. They wouldn't have that that would have surpassed $100,000.

SPEAKER_02 30:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:50

Unless you found other scholarships to go with theirs.

SPEAKER_02 30:52

But I probably would have.

SPEAKER_04 30:58

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:00

Yeah, all three of those wanted me to play baseball. So I would have Yeah, they would have been like, oh bet, because you that's half of it right there.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

And that could have like kind of forfeited what your parents thought from for school. If they knew that somebody's gonna pay.

SPEAKER_02 31:12

Pay for it, yeah. And then it had to be like, oh, well, it's free. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 31:15

Well, if you mess it up, then you know that money goes. That's right.

SPEAKER_02 31:18

That's right. Yeah. Yeah, that would have been.

SPEAKER_04 31:22

Well, so sorry for that little family, that little girl who could not follow the guidelines of the family scholarship.

SPEAKER_02 31:32

Yep, and lost it.

SPEAKER_04 31:33

Guess what?

SPEAKER_02 31:34

That is our believe it, sister of the week.

SPEAKER_04 31:40

$300,000, baby. So I hope your mom and daddy are gonna help you pay for it since they didn't make you stick

Breaking The Rules Then Wanting Help

SPEAKER_04 31:48

to the guidelines.

SPEAKER_02 31:48

Now, whatever state y'all are living in, if y'all hear this, if you want to pay for another person to go to school, I'll go back.

unknown 31:56

Ooh.

SPEAKER_02 32:01

We still should be good though.

SPEAKER_04 32:03

You want to go double check?

SPEAKER_02 32:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:05

Oh, yeah, because it's uh battery. It's a battery.

SPEAKER_02 32:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:12

And you think the sound is still fine?

SPEAKER_02 32:14

Yeah, because that's it's hooked up. It's only operated through the phone.

SPEAKER_04 32:17

Oh, y'all. Did y'all see the lights come out? Ooh, you said you were talking to them people. They said, oh.

SPEAKER_02 32:24

God said you had been in school too long. You are not going back to school. Okay, I'm sorry, Lord. I am not going back.

unknown 32:32

Oh my.

SPEAKER_02 32:32

That's what that was about. God said, You are not going back to school. Y'all saw that? God told me. I guess he said you already 300,000 in the debt in the whole plus.

SPEAKER_04 32:44

Lord have mercy.

SPEAKER_02 32:45

My bad, Lord. I ain't going back no more.

SPEAKER_04 32:46

No, he does not need to go back. Listen, this is it.

SPEAKER_02 32:50

The only schools I'm gonna go to now would be like music school, you know, like music classes.

SPEAKER_04 32:55

No universities.

SPEAKER_02 32:56

Yeah, no, it'll just be, you know, yoga classes, getting those kind of things. But um, let me leave that alone, Lord. Sorry. Believe it, Lord.

SPEAKER_01 33:08

No brother.

SPEAKER_02 33:08

No.

SPEAKER_01 33:09

No, my brother.

SPEAKER_02 33:11

It's not dark in here, too. I didn't remember ever remember it being that dark. Oh, geez. Okay. Well, let's move on. What are we doing?

SPEAKER_04 33:21

All right. So uh um this is acronym A-I-T-A.

SPEAKER_02 33:27

And you know, you've been seeing a lot of those stories.

SPEAKER_04 33:30

Uh-huh. And it's called M-I the A-Hole.

SPEAKER_02 33:36

Yep, that's what it's called. As Kree would say, it's it's called M-I Awake.

SPEAKER_04 33:43

Am I not awake?

SPEAKER_02 33:44

Your eyes been closing. Your blinks are longer than before.

SPEAKER_04 33:48

A-I-T-A-M-I the A-hole.

SPEAKER_02 33:53

All right.

SPEAKER_04 33:54

So because I don't cuss.

SPEAKER_02 33:58

All right.

SPEAKER_04 33:59

All right. So the first story is called The Bedroom Equalizer. What was the show? The town on the equalizer? No, that was. No, I'm thinking of the little car. That's a little black car. What was that show called?

SPEAKER_02 34:14

Oh, uh Night Rider.

SPEAKER_04 34:16

Night Rider. That's what I'm thinking of.

SPEAKER_01 34:26

Yep. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 34:27

Equalizer and Night Rider are two different things.

SPEAKER_02 34:29

Equalizer was the little uh old white guy.

SPEAKER_04 34:31

Okay. That's two different things. Anywho, listen to this. And we want to see is she the agent? The asshole. I'm a lady.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

Okay. All right, here we go.

SPEAKER_04 34:49

I'm just going to get right to it. My 25-year-old boyfriend. No, I was trying to figure out why the 25. Okay, it's a female. Yeah, Juju. She's 25. Okay. Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 35:07

Read it. Don't figure it out. Just read it. That's what you're supposed to do. Read it. And then we'll talk.

SPEAKER_04 35:13

Zip it, lock it, put it in your pocket. My, she's a 25-year-old female boyfriend, he's 28. Likes to be called daddy in the bed while we're being intimate. I've obliged this request, but it started to creep me out. And I've decided I don't want to do it anymore. So he is not happy with this and insists it has nothing to do with the connotation of the word. He just simply enjoys hearing me say it. So since he wasn't budging on the issue, I told him I'd like for him to call me grandma in bed as a compromise. He did not like this option. I said it was giving him visuals he would prefer not to have. Like, okay, join the effing club. Like, why do I want to call you daddy? Because I got a daddy. And that's just weird. So I'm a you call grandma what you envision when I tell you to call me grandma. Anyways, anyways, the last time he tried to initiate intimacy with me, I started to refer to myself as grandma in third person. Do you like it when grandma does that? Do you like it when grandma slaps it like this? And he flew off the handle. Said I ruined the mood, made him feel gross, and I was being ridiculous. I think I proved my point, but he thinks I'm being an asshole. So am I the asshole? I think it's hilarious.

SPEAKER_02 37:00

Yeah, it's it's hilarious. I don't I don't think you're being an asshole. Um you know, because if you don't like to call him daddy and he chooses to demand it, then I think you definitely proved your point. You know what I'm saying? Um he gotta respect what it is that you want to say or whatever, you know, uh, in the bedroom like that. But that that is hilarious. Um, yeah. I I I think he I wonder if he got it, if he understood where she was coming from, or he kind of, or did because they were just dating, right?

SPEAKER_04 37:38

Yeah, they're just dating. Yeah, they probably broke up.

SPEAKER_02 37:41

They probably broke up.

SPEAKER_04 37:42

Well, on top of that, I think about this. Like, if you have a good relationship with your dad, like I call my daddy daddy. Yeah. And so to be sitting up in bed talking about, um, yes, daddy, give it to me. Good, daddy. Like, that's weird. Like, maybe if I didn't have a daddy, I'd be like, sure, because maybe I got daddy issues, so I'm okay with saying that. I'm just saying, I don't know why somebody wants to say it. I'm I'm not calling you daddy. Um, let's think of another word or something else I can call you besides daddy.

SPEAKER_02 38:15

Yeah, call you who you are.

SPEAKER_04 38:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:17

But to say it's a lot of things you can say, you know, whatever, to show that it's that shows that ownership or yeah, power to the person doing what they're doing, you know.

SPEAKER_04 38:28

Because if I'm a visualizing daddy, I'm a visualizing my daddy.

SPEAKER_02 38:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 38:33

And so, yeah, let me show you what that feels like. Give it to grandma. Slap grandma on, yeah. Like you like, wait, wait, wait. And that's exactly how she felt. And that wasn't ridiculous at all. But it was a great analogy to show him how you felt in a moment, that is so crazy.

SPEAKER_02 38:53

Now, what would have been crazier if he would have been like, oh my God, this is turning me on. And you're like, wait, wait, hold up. The grandma part, yes, I never thought about it before. Then, you know, the next night he brings you to bed and has like stuff like old linament and stuff. So rub this on your body, baby. You know, I really want to see your knees. And then he gives you some lingerie with some big draws and them long cone bras and say, put this on, then take it off. Yeah, because he really likes some old women, you know. Them old women with them big cone bras, the one that poke your eye.

SPEAKER_04 39:28

I used to work with this lady and she wasn't an old lady, but she wore those. Because she had big breasts, and I don't know, maybe she couldn't afford different bras, but it was just like big cones.

SPEAKER_02 39:39

I was like, Yeah, them big cone bras mean you want them things to be sitting way like this here.

SPEAKER_04 39:44

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 39:45

Big old cones, man.

unknown 39:47

Crazy.

SPEAKER_02 39:48

Like you don't went outside the construction site, put them things up, strap them right down.

SPEAKER_04 39:52

Ridiculous.

SPEAKER_02 39:53

Directing traffic.

SPEAKER_04 39:55

All right, I have one more.

SPEAKER_02 39:56

Okay, give me another.

SPEAKER_04 39:57

This one is called the Reluctant Babysitter.

SPEAKER_02 40:01

All right, reluctant.

SPEAKER_04 40:02

So

Bedroom Nicknames And Consent

SPEAKER_04 40:03

a 27-year-old female and her friend, who is 24, have kids the same age. They're two years old. We recently did a girls' beach trip. I left my child at home with my husband for the first time.

SPEAKER_05 40:15

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 40:15

And in consequence, for the first time in two years, was child free. My husband does what he can regarding our kids and does a lot, but is gone a lot for work. So I've never been apart from my kid for more than a few hours before someone says, I have a husband issue. That isn't the issue here. My friend brought her child, which no one in the group had a problem with at all.

SPEAKER_05 40:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 40:44

Except my friend has a habit of letting or rather forcing others to watch or parent her kids. Oh no. Now, first of all, I left my child at home. And I ain't being babysitting now.

SPEAKER_02 40:57

I ain't babysitting. Not on this trip.

SPEAKER_04 40:59

All right. So every time we hang out, she kind of checks out, goes on her phone or wanders off and sort of dumps her kid on the friend group. Well, on this beach trip, which was overnight, she did just that to me. Now remember, this is my first time in a long time I've been kid free. And here she is dumping her kid on me. Her kid is asking me to play with them, walk with them, you know, kid stuff. And I just want a break.

SPEAKER_01 41:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 41:34

But here's my friend playing on her phone, just totally checked out. I try to redirect redirect her kid back to her, saying, Oh, you should ask your mom to play. To which she says, without missing a B. No, you have more patience for anyway, you play with them.

SPEAKER_01 41:53

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 41:54

So that's what the mama said. Yeah. Because at first I was like, wait, the kid's two years old. Okay. So first of all, you tell me I can't.

SPEAKER_02 42:01

Keep going. Read the story.

SPEAKER_04 42:02

My blood was effing boils. And I explained to her that I left my kid at home because I wanted to be kid free for the night. Right. And not babysit hers. She rolled her eyes and I just lost it. I told her to stop being lazy and watch your own kid. Of course, she was pissed, but the rest of the group had my back. But my friend was so angry. I can't help but feel like I'm in the wrong. Am I the asshole?

SPEAKER_02 42:36

No. Child, no. You are not. Your friend is the asshole. One for okay, I'm gonna say this. I don't know what the friend had anybody to lead the boy, the child with, whoever the boy girl. I don't know if the you know friend had that village. If the friend did have the village and she was just having separation issues, yes, your friend is the asshole. You know what I mean? Your friend's the asshole regardless, not necessarily because she brought the kid, but even when she did bring the kid to not have her own child. And like, so you think we're not gonna enjoy ourselves because you got, hey, this is your choice.

SPEAKER_04 43:13

First of all.

SPEAKER_02 43:13

Laid down you had it, you got to have the responsibilities too.

SPEAKER_04 43:16

This is why you have to set rules. This is why you have to set rules when you say this event is adult only. And if y'all were trying to get away from kids and just to be able to have a ladies, a night weekend where y'all can go drink, go do what you want to do, not have to worry about husbands, not have to worry about kids, and just enjoy one another. Sometimes you have to be specific in what this weekend is gonna be like. And if she could not find a babysitter, then she can't go. Yeah, and you know, and it is what it is, unfortunately. Yeah, there are and we all know there are other opportunities and times. Where kids are involved because y'all have kids. So there'll be times where there's a mommy hangout and kids are welcome.

SPEAKER_02 44:07

She might meet somebody eventually one day that a babysitter child, but right now she can't go.

SPEAKER_04 44:11

She can't go. And I'm so sorry that you don't have a sitter or you don't have a husband that is willing to watch the kid or whatever that may be, but you can't go. And guess what? I'm not watching your child.

SPEAKER_01 44:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 44:24

You here, you decide to bring it. She's better than me because guess I would, I would have got up and went to another room or got up and went to the room.

SPEAKER_02 44:31

Yeah, went to the beach or whatever. I'd have been like, Hey, little Tyrone, you need to go to your mama, but I'm on my vacation.

SPEAKER_04 44:36

Yeah, I'll tell him.

SPEAKER_02 44:38

And I say it loud like that. I say, uh, you better get him. You got more energy. Well, look, my child's at the crib.

SPEAKER_04 44:45

And that's what she did.

SPEAKER_02 44:46

Straight up. You if you don't, if you don't get little Tyrone, I'm gonna go put him in the bedroom, lock the door on him. He's gonna stay in that place.

SPEAKER_04 44:54

Don't do that. But she did the right thing. And then it's her responsibility. Instead of her time being ruined and not speaking up and being mad the next day, going home telling her husband, Susie Bop, left, would not watch her child, and the whole weekend, I it sucked for me because I had to play with her kid the whole time. So the idea that she spoke up and said what she needed to say, you can be pissed and you can be mad, but come get your child.

SPEAKER_02 45:21

Yeah, I'll I'll thump little Sasatuan on the head. Susatuan, bow, sit your butt down.

SPEAKER_04 45:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:26

And then he'll sit down because he won't play with you after you thump him in the head.

SPEAKER_04 45:29

Oh no.

SPEAKER_02 45:29

About two times.

SPEAKER_04 45:30

But that ain't that baby's fault. That's his mama's fault.

SPEAKER_02 45:34

But it's his fault, he keeps coming out as you say, look, stop. I don't want to play no more.

SPEAKER_04 45:37

Did she say stop?

SPEAKER_02 45:38

I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 45:39

I didn't hear her say that. And maybe, well, no, she said she said go play with your mom. Oh, but the mama responded back and said You got more energy. You got more patience.

SPEAKER_02 45:48

Yeah, more patience and energy. Say, look, this is not my child. Uh-uh. This is not my child.

SPEAKER_04 45:53

So I'm proud of the lady for speaking up about it because no, nobody's doing that. So, sweet P, you are not um the asshole. Your friend is. Your friend's the asshole. Your friend is the asshole for coming on a trip and then won't otherwise. You're gonna watch her child. Tell her we said it. Tell her we said it. Straight up. We'll say it to her face.

SPEAKER_02 46:11

That's right. Yep, to her and La Jaquavis.

SPEAKER_04 46:14

Mm-hmm. Because that is not right. So you set your boundary. Sweet. You spoke your mind.

SPEAKER_02 46:19

Speak it.

SPEAKER_04 46:20

You did it, sister.

SPEAKER_02 46:21

You did it. You ain't the asshole.

SPEAKER_04 46:23

You ain't.

SPEAKER_02 46:24

Your girl is Bethany. She's the asshole.

SPEAKER_04 46:27

She sure is.

SPEAKER_02 46:28

That's right. Leave your baby at home next time.

SPEAKER_04 46:30

Uh-huh. And she knew exactly what she was doing coming on that girl trip.

SPEAKER_02 46:34

If you didn't have no energy for your child, you know where he should have stayed?

SPEAKER_04 46:38

At home.

SPEAKER_02 46:38

In your ovaries.

SPEAKER_04 46:40

Oh no.

SPEAKER_02 46:42

He should have. You lay down, you pay the price.

SPEAKER_03 46:47

Oh my.

SPEAKER_02 46:48

You gotta think about all that stuff. In the heat of the moment, you gotta think about it. In the heat of the moment, when it's getting hot and steamy, you gotta think like years ahead and say, if I'm on a girls' trip, am I ready to be minding my own child? Or I'm not. I'm sorry, sweetheart. We can't do this right now. I don't want to do this. You gotta stop right then.

SPEAKER_04 47:07

Right then.

SPEAKER_02 47:07

Yeah. You can't think about, okay, well, this little five minutes gonna be pleasurable. You gotta be like, look. And then you gotta I look we can't do this because I'm seeing myself

Girls Trip Babysitting Boundary

SPEAKER_02 47:19

on a girl's trip and I don't even want to deal with my own child. This ain't worth it.

SPEAKER_04 47:23

This ain't worth it.

SPEAKER_02 47:24

This ain't worth it.

SPEAKER_04 47:25

This ain't worth it.

SPEAKER_02 47:26

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 47:28

Well, I'm just saying, listen.

SPEAKER_02 47:31

I always thought ahead.

SPEAKER_04 47:33

Okay. All right, I got one more. Okay, what you got? Okay. This is a story.

SPEAKER_02 47:43

Okay, let's go.

SPEAKER_04 47:44

No names.

SPEAKER_02 47:45

All right, no names.

SPEAKER_03 47:46

I ain't saying no name. I ain't saying no name. I ain't saying no name. I ain't saying no name. Where you else? Who you is? What you did? Don't say she. I ain't saying no name. Hey.

SPEAKER_04 48:08

All right.

SPEAKER_02 48:09

Shout out to J Ballantyne and Tank.

SPEAKER_04 48:11

I want y'all to think about it.

SPEAKER_02 48:12

RB Money Podcast for that little case.

SPEAKER_04 48:14

I want y'all to think about when you had your uh teenage years.

SPEAKER_02 48:20

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_04 48:21

And although we didn't have cell phones in our teenage years.

SPEAKER_02 48:24

Okay, correct.

SPEAKER_04 48:25

But let's just think about something that's yours. We'll have something. Maybe a pager.

SPEAKER_02 48:30

I didn't have a page in my teenage years. Um I was in college. My first pager. Okay, what about you was in your teenage years?

SPEAKER_04 48:38

I ain't have a pager either.

SPEAKER_02 48:39

Oh.

SPEAKER_04 48:40

Um, what about a wallet?

SPEAKER_02 48:42

Yeah, I had a wallet.

SPEAKER_04 48:43

Something that just belongs to you.

SPEAKER_02 48:44

Yeah, I had a wallet.

SPEAKER_04 48:45

Okay. So let's say you have something that you belong that personally belongs to you. We might for us have been like a diary.

SPEAKER_02 48:53

I remember hey, boys, we used to have a wallet. Our wallet used to have that little condom spot because it stayed in our wallet forever, because we always just kept it in there and be like, hey man, I've got this. Same way. Okay. For for years. For years. For years. As soon as you put it on, you try to think.

SPEAKER_04 49:11

So let's just say it's something that belongs to you that's personal, it's yours.

SPEAKER_02 49:16

Man, my wallet.

SPEAKER_04 49:17

And one of your little co-workers comes and takes what belongs to you. And you like, hey, listen.

SPEAKER_02 49:24

Give me my wallet back.

SPEAKER_04 49:25

Please give me my wallet back. Give me my diary back. Whatever it is.

SPEAKER_02 49:28

Even if it's your homie.

SPEAKER_04 49:29

Yeah. You saying, give it to me. And they like, ah, and they don't give it to you. And they act, they put it somewhere where maybe you can't get it.

SPEAKER_02 49:38

Yeah, it's cool and funny games, but after so.

SPEAKER_04 49:41

But after so when you can tell by somebody's face that they're for real. Like I'm for real. Like, give me back my stuff.

SPEAKER_02 49:48

Give me back my stuff.

SPEAKER_04 49:49

And if they don't give you back your stuff and you punch them in the face, are you wrong?

SPEAKER_02 49:55

I mean, you know, violence is never the answer.

SPEAKER_04 49:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:00

It's it's never the answer, you know, in in that case. I'm not gonna say violence is never the answer because violence to some people is self-defense.

SPEAKER_04 50:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:12

You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 50:14

And I guess it depends on what, if it's my diary, what is in my diary that you could read.

SPEAKER_02 50:21

So you're defending your piece. You're defending your life.

SPEAKER_04 50:23

Yeah, so if I'm thinking of like, if she if they read what's in my diary, who could they tell? This could be like a life-ruining moment.

SPEAKER_02 50:33

Which is your phone is the kids' diary nowadays. It has very personal information in it.

SPEAKER_04 50:37

Yeah, so if you take it from me and I'm nervous that you're gonna read something that you could tell lots of people, especially if it's the messy friend. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 50:47

Yeah, I'm finna bop you before you get to do you the dirty work.

SPEAKER_04 50:51

Right.

SPEAKER_02 50:52

So if I know you, oh yeah. We gotta do that.

SPEAKER_04 50:54

Because we gotta, I mean, like I don't have time to go and find the supervisor.

SPEAKER_02 50:59

No.

SPEAKER_04 50:59

Because by that time you'd have read all my stuff. And so I gotta figure out what I can do in the moment.

SPEAKER_02 51:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 51:05

Maybe put them in the headlock.

SPEAKER_02 51:07

The principal, you can't, yeah, because I remember fighting the homeboy for taking my wallet, you know, and this was my big days. I was hungry. I couldn't go to you only had 15 minutes to get some canteen.

SPEAKER_04 51:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 51:17

So he took my wallet. I'm ready to eat.

SPEAKER_04 51:21

Or by the time you get somebody, whether he takes your money and it's gone. And you can't say I had this amount. It's a word, my word is.

SPEAKER_02 51:28

I need my wallet because I'm ready to eat.

SPEAKER_04 51:29

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02 51:30

And I was fast. I was big, but I was fast.

SPEAKER_04 51:33

Yeah. What you do?

SPEAKER_02 51:34

I caught him.

SPEAKER_04 51:35

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 51:36

Wop, wop, wop. Real quick. Got my wallet.

SPEAKER_04 51:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 51:39

Went in there about my Star Crunch. Went in about my nutter butter. And I bought my um my uh black cherry check drink.

SPEAKER_03 51:48

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 51:48

But my and my that dude had that little eye, little pop swole eye. And they tried to tell me that I was in the wrong. I said he he stole from me. And I said I was hungry. I can't miss a meal. And that teacher did her little face like that?

unknown 52:04

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 52:05

Because I know she was laughing at me when I told her I couldn't miss a meal. And she she said, Okay. All right, look, y'all need to stop that. That was it.

SPEAKER_04 52:14

Yeah. So I don't know. Are they the asshole for whopping somebody for stealing something that belonged to them? Yeah. Are you are you the asshole for doing that?

SPEAKER_02 52:24

Because sometimes you can't wait to get it back.

SPEAKER_04 52:26

Yeah. I feel like they were the asshole for taking it.

SPEAKER_02 52:29

Yeah. It's like if somebody comes in this house and I call the police and they still got something that belongs to them. They right there in my presence. I'm not finna wait on the police. Yeah. If you in my reach.

SPEAKER_04 52:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:41

I call the police, they're coming. No. I'm you in my reach.

SPEAKER_04 52:44

I think you got something that belongs to me.

SPEAKER_02 52:48

If I know I got these hands too. I don't think you ain't finna shoot me or kill me.

SPEAKER_04 52:52

Oh, you finna get it. Well, yeah, but you gotta be make sure they don't have a gun or something.

SPEAKER_02 52:57

That's why I said if you ain't finna shoot me or kill me, you finna get it.

SPEAKER_04 52:59

Yeah, you gonna get it.

SPEAKER_02 53:00

Yeah. You finna get these hands.

SPEAKER_04 53:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 53:04

I got these hands now. Thank God. I do too.

If Someone Takes Your Stuff

SPEAKER_04 53:12

Anyways, that was my adding on to that with Am I the asshole? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 53:18

No, you're not the asshole, but you gotta be careful.

SPEAKER_04 53:21

Gotta be careful. There are consequences in all the things.

SPEAKER_02 53:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 53:24

But definitely. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 53:27

Is it worth the consequence?

SPEAKER_04 53:29

Is it worth the consequence? That's a fact. Because even thinking about the lady and the friend, like, you know, are they gonna still be friends?

SPEAKER_02 53:36

Yeah. Yeah. Some people Is it worth the friends? But I I think I think it is.

SPEAKER_04 53:39

Is that girl gonna still be friends?

SPEAKER_02 53:41

I think that's worth that's worth losing your friend over. If you think it is because that's not a good friend.

SPEAKER_04 53:46

That's not a good friend. What about the couple and the grandma and daddy? Do you think he'd be like, she's ridiculous. I don't even want to date her anymore.

SPEAKER_02 53:54

I think he would. Yeah. Because he stormed out.

SPEAKER_04 53:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 53:57

As opposed to laughing and being like, I would have been like playing around. You would say, oh, grandma, this stuff. I'd be like, oh, I see what you do. Well, granddaddy finna beat it down. You know, I would have done something like that. But for him to bounce and then get up out of there, he is uh He needs a daddy lady. He's sensitive to.

SPEAKER_04 54:15

Yeah, he yeah. And for what that so he might have daddy issues.

SPEAKER_02 54:18

He has some kind of issues. He has uh, I don't want to say the Napoleon complex, but he has uh issues of where he needs to have power. You see what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_05 54:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 54:32

That's what it was. And so as soon as she kind of ripped that from him, he's like, oh, I'm not dealing with this. He was a little spa brat.

SPEAKER_04 54:39

So she's.

SPEAKER_02 54:47

The only thing that's gonna make me get up is the wrong name.

SPEAKER_01 54:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 54:50

The wrong name is gonna make me get up. Other than that, okay. Granddaddy, you call me Elmo. That's gonna be all in there. Tickle me Elmo if you want to, whatever.

SPEAKER_05 55:04

Lord.

SPEAKER_02 55:05

No. Yeah, he has, he has, he has uh.

SPEAKER_04 55:08

And she may not be the one for him. There are some women who love to call somebody daddy. Yeah, you can get it. You'll find that one. You'll find the one that likes to call people daddy.

SPEAKER_02 55:16

There's plenty daddy. They might call you, they might talk like babies. They might do all that stuff. You know, put on a those the what the Furbies when they be putting on them little fur costumes with the booted out so they can have sex like animals.

SPEAKER_01 55:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 55:30

Yeah. So all of that. Hey, you find somebody, but no, sometimes it's worth losing a friend over when you find out something that you that's not. Yeah, that's right.

SPEAKER_04 55:39

It's boundaries.

SPEAKER_02 55:40

You're not giving up right. You're not you're not gonna give up um your values or your morals just to keep a friend, which people often do.

SPEAKER_04 55:50

No, and the friend should have been saying, I'm so sorry.

SPEAKER_02 55:53

I'm sorry, y'all. I'm sorry, my baby bad as hell.

SPEAKER_04 55:56

I'm sorry that, you know, you're right. He I should be watching you.

SPEAKER_02 55:59

Yeah, he's bad as hell. I'm so sorry.

SPEAKER_04 56:01

She should have said that.

SPEAKER_02 56:02

I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 56:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 56:04

Yeah. All right, side eye of the week.

Side Eye Of The Week Jeep Drama

SPEAKER_02 56:07

Ooh, what's yours? Of course, my side eye is my Jeep, just it died on me. Old Yellow died on me. So I'm gonna try to figure out. I think it may be the alternator. Um, what does that guy say? I think it's the turbinator.

SPEAKER_05 56:20

Who said that?

SPEAKER_02 56:21

It was like one of the clips on this uh old man talking about acting like he knows what's going on in the car. It might be something like about the turbinator up under the hood. That let me check it out.

SPEAKER_04 56:29

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 56:30

And so uh, you know, she's she's she's doing what she does, you know. She she just died on your boy. She died in the driveway, though. So well, she died, she well, she had a little minor stroke when we went to eat at lunch, and we had to put her back to uh jump her off. That day was just then the rain hit, then the other thing, and all this is so much going on. So much after that, then drove it to the house and she started losing power as I was driving. Like, you know, I couldn't do that. So, oh Lord, please just make it home. Soon as I pulled into the driveway, got right up to the garage, she just said and didn't turn over nothing. So I gotta get her told on Tuesday. That's my side out of the week. Oh, yeah, I gotta put some more money in you, man. Jeez. And then it's raining so much, so I can't drive my motorcycle. But my grateful is something I'll talk about later. All right. Like I said, y'all, I told you at the beginning, it was a rough, it's a rough week on me.

SPEAKER_04 57:35

It was.

SPEAKER_02 57:36

I'm going through trials and tribulations.

SPEAKER_04 57:37

He is going through trials and tribulations. It has been a rough week, some things. And then on top of that, when his car, after we had eaten, I left from us eating. Um, because it took him so long to get us our food. It's very good food. Like, I don't know if y'all have been to Seasons in Marietta off of Lemon Street. Um, it's a small place. You can make reservations. We did make reservations at the last minute, but we were able to get in. Um but they because their food is so good, I know why they're busy because it is so good.

SPEAKER_02 58:11

It's probably like 30 people can sit inside, and maybe they got like four picnic tables outside. Right.

SPEAKER_04 58:17

And the kitchen is so small. Um we sat down about 1150-ish, got our food. It took almost an hour.

SPEAKER_02 58:26

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_04 58:26

Almost a almost an hour to get our food. Um, when we ordered, well, it did take the waiter a little while to come get our order and get our drinks and everything. So, anyways, I'd say it took somewhere between 30 to 45 minutes to get our food.

SPEAKER_02 58:39

But it was graduation weekend too. Week, so it's a lot of people.

SPEAKER_04 58:42

School was out, it was just really busy. But anywho, the food was great. Um, but then I had to get back to work, and so I told him, I was like, I'm gonna go. You say pay the bill, I got to go. And so I went on back to work. Soon as I got to my cube, he called and was like, my car will start, this and that. And I was like, Oh no.

SPEAKER_02 59:02

Just call an Uber.

SPEAKER_04 59:03

I said, just call Uber, come to my job. And because I had a dentist appointment right around the corner from at two, I was leaving work early, anyways. Um, and so um then he's like, just been a rough week. He said, I'm just gonna walk to the square. So he walks to the square and and he says, I'm sitting on the bench in the square. I was like, okay, and so I um was sitting there talking. All of a sudden I look outside the window and it just starts pouring around. Oh no, he's sitting outside in the square in the middle of the rain. I was like, poor thing, just just a crazy day for him. What was that? Thursday?

SPEAKER_02 59:42

Yeah, because I that's when I had the interview, and then they was like, Well, I like you a lot, but you're just not ready. You don't have the experience we need. I was like, oh, Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_05 59:53

Yeah, so it was rough.

SPEAKER_02 59:55

Yeah, it's like doors are closing, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. It's like, oh, okay. Yeah. What you trying to tell me, God? So I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:04

Well, we don't, yeah. Yeah, I think it's challenging when you don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:08

Yeah, it's uh when you don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:12

Anyways, just yeah, and so I was like, oh no. So it was, yeah, you could side eye the whole week for all the things, it just was. And I try to help him to think, you know, the great things to be grateful for, and the things that he normally can automatically, you know, do. And but when you layered and layered because it didn't stop there, remember the next day, even up more.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:42

It's like it was just more nonsense.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:46

It was just piling up, yeah, more nonsense, man. And I could see, you know, it would be challenging with everything piling on to you know, to be able to do that.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:57

Testing testing me, man, testing my character, testing everything.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:00

Yeah, I was like, you gonna let the devil win. You gonna let him win.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:05

But yeah, he got some good blows in. Oh yeah. He hit me.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:10

He did.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:11

I'm blocking it, but he's still pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, bop, take this, bop, take that. So he's trying to make me rip these gloves off and scratch them in the eyes, fight, you know, illegally. Can't do that. But okay, what am I grateful for?

Gratitude When Everything Piles Up

SPEAKER_04 1:01:25

What are you grateful for?

SPEAKER_02 1:01:26

Um, I'm grateful for since my my Jeep died, that Kimani is in Jersey and I get to use his car. Mm-hmm. Because, like I said, I was like, well, I can drive a motorcycle, but then it's raining all week. So I can't do that, you know. So um I'm grateful that I do have an opportunity to still be able to get to where I need to get, you know. Um, because I gotta go to Atlanta Tuesday to take the uh CPR first AED uh certification so that for the uh my internship. And um, but I am grateful that in spite all of these things, um, you know, means are still, you know, like I said, when my car wouldn't work work, Kahari was able to come get me and jumped it off to get it home.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:11

And just that he jumped up and did it. Now, I'll tell you, I we need to tell him that too.

SPEAKER_05 1:02:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:16

Because we can tell when they get up and leave the house, like because we could the garage door goes up, we know that. And he jumped up and he got up and after it, you know. So just that too. Like, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:29

Yeah, yeah, he came in and hooked me up.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:31

Yeah, so just saying, you know, you know, thank you for understanding and getting up and doing, you know, because some people don't have kids that uh leave, they just leave there. You're like, where are you at? I'm on the way, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 1:02:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:44

That so that that was Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:48

So, um What am I grateful for?

SPEAKER_04 1:02:51

Would you like to know? Because you didn't ask me.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:52

I was I was about to.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:54

Yeah, I was looking at what do we what do you think?

SPEAKER_04 1:02:56

Well, let me see. I don't know. I think I've been grateful for the we whole weekend. Um, even though I did work um Saturday, um, just the weekend of just I don't know, it still felt nice of like um did the I did, I was running. Well, my my mother-in-law likes to rip and run. We you she if you look up ripping and running in dictionary, that's her.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:26

It's her.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:27

That's a love of rip and run, baby. She is a ripping and runner. So we were at Walmart and Coles and doing all the things. And so I did a little bit of rip and running, but um I don't mind a rip and run for her.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:43

So ripping and running. Ripping and running. Not ripping running. Ripping and ripping. Ripping and running, yeah. Ripping and running.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:48

I don't mind to be ripping and running with her. So we was ripping and running so she can get some things she needed before the graduation. And then thereafter, we turned the graduation on and um just did that. And key put burgers on the grill, and I made a charcuterie board, and it's just nice just to kind of be in the comfort of our home. Um, I don't know. I like being at home, and so just having that and then turn on the little lights on the patio. I don't know. I just loved it. It was just nice.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:20

Yeah, home is comfortable.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:21

Yeah, and then um today, um I still got, I didn't get up till a little bit after nine, and so we both exercised. I did the I was only gonna do 30 minutes, and then I ended up doing 30 more minutes or something on the tread. And Keith did the bike, and um we just kind of had good conversation as we were showering and getting dressed. I mean, it was just this nice to get up and just kind of move slow at our own pace, good conversations, had a little something to eat, then sat around, talked some more, and then started ripping and running. Started ripping and running. So they got ready to go to my nephew's um dinner, and so everybody was there, had a good time and everybody there, and so yeah, it was just nice. So I'm looking forward to, oh, I'm going to look

Movies Tomorrow And Cheap Candy Plans

SPEAKER_04 1:05:10

forward to. Oh, we are looking forward to now.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:12

What are you looking forward to?

SPEAKER_04 1:05:14

Looking forward to um tomorrow, because tomorrow we we um we're doing movies, right?

SPEAKER_02 1:05:21

Yes, we go. I need to make sure they're gonna be open tomorrow because it's Memorial Day holiday.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:26

So we're thinking of the movies tomorrow. So that'll be nice. I don't really want to get dress dressed tomorrow, so I'm gonna really be really laid back tomorrow. Probably leggings and a sweatshirt or something like that.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:38

So we're comfortable in there. Get our kids packed in the movies.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:41

Get our kids packed for the movies. I think I'm gonna get my own candy from Walgreens before I go because last time I bought Eminem's child was six dollars.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:51

They didn't have your raisin nets.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:55

I like to combine it with my popcorn.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:57

They had all that other stuff that uh like Cluster cooked cooked dough, cluster Oreo.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:04

No. So I'm gonna go to Walgreens and I'm gonna go to Walgreens and get my box candy beforehand. So I can have my raisinettes with my popcorn. So we're gonna do that tomorrow. Go watch boosters. So that'll be nice tomorrow, too.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:19

You know what my side

Meta Glasses Prank In Walgreens

SPEAKER_02 1:06:20

I should have been? Yeah. That little boy today in Walgreens. I went to get a uh a card. And so um I went to get a car for Nolan's graduation. And so we're in Walgreen, and this little kid, black dude, Liz uh Youngster, walk up to me and said, excuse me, sir, trying to talk African. Uh I'm not from this country. Um and I looked at it and he got the Ray-Ban Meta glasses on. I have mine on. And uh his little light was spinning, means he was recording. And he said, I need to actually, I said, What you recording me for, boss? He said, Oh, I'm not recording. I said, Man, look at my glass. I I got the same glass as you got. And he started smiling. He said, No, no, this is vibranial. I said, Man, get out of my face. And then he just started laughing and walked away. So I went to the red shit and I said, Man, what what's up? Because I saw the little boy, a little young black dude too. I saw him looking back there at him. So I guess he know him.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:14

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:14

I said, What what they got going on back there, man? He said, uh, probably filming content. I said, Yeah, he tried to get me. I said, I told him. He started asking me the crazy question. I said, Dude, I got the same glasses you got on. So what he said, oh yeah, you do got them on.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:26

I said, They're not even smart enough to notice that.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:29

I said, I said, so I said, it's all good. I said, just tell him, be careful, man, and good luck on creating great content. And I walked out, man. So I should have gave him a side out of it.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:39

Are you somewhere on somebody's TikTok? They laughing at you. It might come across your feed. You keep talking about it, it's gonna come up.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:44

You're like, oh, OG was on it. OG was on it. But uh, I'm looking forward to the movies tomorrow because uh I think Kiki Palmer in Boosters is gonna be hilarious. Um I love Kiki Palmer. I love movie popcorn. I am a popcorn fanatic. Like I love any kind of parkour movie.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:02

And our movie theater, although we don't like to leave the movie, but you can get refill your popcorn for free.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:07

Yeah, because I don't like to miss anything when I'm watching a series or a show or something. I feel like the smallest word or phrase would make me mess up all at all. Everything. Yeah. Um, so that's what I'm looking forward to.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:21

All right.

Closing Thoughts And Summer Plans

SPEAKER_02 1:08:22

So uh, hey, we're getting ready to get out of here.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:25

And this is my TikTok outfit.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:27

All right, all right, uh.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:29

I be wanting to order stuff from TikTok, but sometimes it uh one time I had I bought one outfit and then I didn't it didn't fit and I wanted to return it. They was like, just keep it and we'll read the money.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:39

We trying to get rid of all these.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:42

You did us a favor. You you helped us uh get a smaller storage facility. So um uh maybe I'll find a I'm gonna buy me some off TikTok and I'll let y'all know what I got. Yeah. So um, y'all, this has been the Refreshingly Normal Podcast.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:58

Podcast.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:59

I'm looking forward to this summer because I'm trying to create some kind of content. I don't know what I want to really create, but uh Korean, I try to create something. We'll figure it out. All right? So take care of yourself, say no to drugs, look both ways before you cross the street. I won't be able to say that to my kids anymore. Well, I mean, my high school kids, I can say it to middle school kids, but the high school is always like they always have something else to say. Such and such won't, or you know, they always, you know, middle school, I did it before and they be like, What? I don't do drugs. Like, get out of here. So, all right, y'all. We're getting ready to get up out of here.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:35

All right.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:36

Take it easy, and we'll see ya when we see you.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:40

Peace.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:49

The Refreshingly Normal Podcast.