Before & After: What Renovating Your Soul Really Takes | Ep. 6

After a brief hiatus, Alexandria returns with a compelling installment of Renovating the Soul. In this episode, she introduces Soul Talks—a series of intentional, direct conversations that delve into the essence of the soul and the transformative process of its renewal.

Drawing inspiration from the HGTV show Unsellable Houses, Alexandria uses home renovation as a metaphor for personal transformation. She emphasizes that, much like houses require more than surface-level fixes, our souls need deep, foundational work to achieve true change. This process involves confronting and addressing internal issues rather than merely masking them.

Alexandria outlines key components of soul renovation, including:

• Self-awareness: Recognizing and understanding one's thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
• Accountability: Taking responsibility for personal growth and the impact of one's actions.
• Consistent effort: Committing to ongoing introspection and self-improvement.

She candidly discusses the challenges inherent in this journey, acknowledging that it requires hard work and perseverance. However, she assures listeners that the rewards—such as personal growth, healing, and a more authentic life—are well worth the effort.

This episode serves as both an introduction to the concept of soul renovation and a motivational guide for listeners ready to undertake their own transformative journeys.

Tune in to discover how renovating your soul can lead to profound personal growth and a more fulfilling life.

Resources: 

• Unsellable Houses

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:07

Welcome back to Renovating the Soul Podcast. I am your host, Alexandria Robinson, and really I should be welcoming myself back because baby we were sick for the entire month of February, and I keep having to keep myself from saying March because that's how fast time has flown by, that it's already the end of March, which is crazy. Y'all, I never expected to get sick and to be sick for that long. It started with my youngest son getting an ear infection, and then he got um the antibiotics, and he had an allergic reaction to the antibiotics, so I had to take him to the emergency room, and then literally that week after, we all when I say we, me and the three boys, we all got sick. My husband somehow never gets sick. I don't know how he how he does it, but me and the three boys, we got sick and we were sick for a month, and we're really just kind of getting over some stuff. Like, I still have a little congestion. My youngest one still kind of gets runny nose here and there, but that could also be allergies because it's springtime. But anyways, y'all, I am so sad that I had to miss a few episodes, it really broke my heart. I really tried not to get discouraged because I've shared on my personal social media that my word for this year is consistency, consistency. And with the with this podcast, it's so important for me to stay on it, to stay consistent. And when I wasn't able to get up and force myself to record the episodes, and I was just I was struggling. I was like, maybe this is your sign that you give up, that you quit because you've you're way in over your head, and so I had to struggle through, you know, being sick, taking care of the boys, taking care of myself, and then also with those doubts and just you know the frustration that comes with not being able to move and do what you want to do. I had to take time off of work, I had to, it's just crazy. It was so crazy, and the I guess the the good thing is that the boys didn't lose their spirit, they're still pretty up and spunky. We didn't have COVID, we didn't have the flu. We don't, we don't it was I thought it was just gonna be your basic cold, but I've been hearing that something like this is going around where it lasts for a long time anyway. So I know we're not the only ones, we just end up getting caught in in the we end up getting we end up catching whatever it was. So, but I'm back, I am back, and I didn't quit. I didn't quit. So, no, I am here, I'm back. I'm super excited to continue on. It sucked too because we left right at midseason, season or sorry, not yeah, we left right at mid-season, episode five. That's what I was trying to say. So we left right at episode five, and um, I was so pumped about that. I was like, man, we made it halfway because the first season will have 10 episodes, and so and then life, you know, life happens. So, anyways, I am back. I'm so excited to be with you all. Thank you so much for your patience, for your love, for your support, for your encouragement, even the frustration that I got from people who were like, When is the next episode coming out? When are you doing the next episode? Like, even that is motivating because to be missed, to be desired in that way, that you all want to hear the next topic, that you all want to engage in the podcast in that way, made me want to continue on, made me want to get up, you know. So I appreciate all of the love, the support, the DMs, the messages, and all of that stuff. So, anywho, okay, so I want to talk a little bit about the episode that we're gonna do today, which is actually gonna be a part one and part two. So, this episode will be part one, the next episode will be part two. Before we jump into what the topic is, I want to talk a little bit about how the season is structured so far, what you all have seen so far. So, what you've heard is that not every episode explicitly talks about the soul or renovating, right? We talk about various topics that all play a role into our soul that show up in our everyday lives, that cause us to look deep within, that um are a part of doing the work, but not every in not every episode has been this is what the soul is or this is what renovating is. We talked about why the soul matters in the first episode, but since then we've hit on, like I said, several different topics. And so I want to introduce soul talks. I want to introduce this theme called soul talks where we have these intentional conversations about the soul and what it means to renovate, what it means to look within, and what it means to actually be doing the work, really giving the practical tools and tips, breaking down what the soul is, the compartments of the soul, what we understand about the soul, where we lack, where we lack understanding about the soul, right? Um, so that's what these soul talks are, and I'm I'm pretty excited and pumped to start doing them. Um, today we're gonna have our first soul talk. So part one will be this episode, like I said, part two will be the next one. So today in part one, we're gonna be talking about um renov the renovating part of renovating the soul, so breaking down that and exploring that topic a little more, which I I know I keep saying it, but I've been gone for a long time. I'm back and I'm better, as Bright Bright Bright Lord, can't say the boy's name. Bryson Tiller. Yes, Bryson Tiller would say I'm back and I'm better. Um, and then the second, so the part two will be a uh deep dive into the philosophical views of the soul, right? So I'm super super excited to be talking about this after the first episode, why the soul matters. A lot of people reached out and they were like, I never thought about the soul in this way. I didn't realize how big of a role that the soul played, or yeah, I didn't realize that I should be paying more attention, right, to what's going on um within my soul. It's just not a conversation that we're always having, and I and I get that, I totally get that. That's why I started this podcast, right? To kind of make it normal, to make it um your normal everyday kind of practical thing, and and to make it a part of our life rhythm, too, right? So, um, yeah, so I'm really excited to continue that conversation to give you all more on both the renovating aspect and on the soul. So let's jump in. So in the first episode, I gave three definitions of renovating. I'm gonna read those again and then I'm gonna add one more. The dictionary definitions are, and these are the ones that I read in the first episode, to repair and improve something. This is what renovating is to repair and improve something, the process of improving broken, damaged, or outdated things, making something new or bringing something back to life. And then the one that I want to add is to restore to a former or better state. I said it in the first episode, I really enjoy all of these definitions. If you're like me, when you hear the word renovating, one of the first things that probably comes to your mind is HGTV or renovating a house, right? That more um practical thing that that uh our minds might jump to of renovating a house, renovating um a space. And so I love these definitions that really apply to renovating, you know, a house, but also when you look at how they apply to renovating our souls and to renovating ourselves, that we are repairing or improving a part of us, that it is the process of improving something broken or damaged or outdated within us, um, that we are making something new or bringing something back to life, right? We're learning, or there's a part of us that's been uh suppressed or lie dormant that we're bringing back to life, and then the last one we're restoring to a former or better state, and with this last definition to restore to a former or better state, I want to address this specifically because when we think about going back to a former state, we may think about going back to a former version of who we are, and if you're like me, you've tried to do that, and it's proven to be more difficult than it sounds because sometimes we're trying to tell ourselves to go back to the the me from 10 years ago, or the college me, or the fun mom me, or the early marriage me, or whatever it is, right? Um, and we try to do that, and it proves to be again a super difficult, complicated task because we cannot always go back to who we used to be, but instead we have to restore, improve, move from where we are now. It doesn't mean that we have to lose all those elements, it just means that we have to take where we are now, right, with the things that we loved then and try to move and restore from there. However, when you think about renovating a house, and we're gonna talk about this more in a second, sometimes there are things that are done to a house and they've been done wrong or it's damaged, right? And so you need to repair it to bring it back to the former place or the the um yeah, to the former place or to the better place of where it was, right? So you're not necessarily changing anything. Let's take a pipe, for example. If there's a pipe burst, I'm not necessarily taking out the pipe and getting a prettier pipe. I'm taking out that pipe and I'm and I'm restoring that part of the house, that bathroom, whatever it is, back to its former state. And so when we think about that when it comes to us, sometimes it's not about going back to a former version of who we are, but instead kind of coming back to the basics, like coming back to the foundational things. Um, I I I liken this probably the best example that I can think of is when you're in a relationship, and sometimes in a relationship you lose certain foundational elements of yourself, and you don't realize that until you're either out of the relationship or until maybe you run across something and you're like, hey, I used to do that, or I used to be that, or I used to, and these are like your core foundational things, right? Like these are you know things that are really part of the structure of who you are and not necessarily uh the just like the add-ons, it so to speak. And so I I know it sounds weird to say like being back to the former state, are you saying go back to the former me? No, sometimes we can't go back to who we used to be. That's just that's just the way the cookie crumbles. Um, sometimes we are um going to have to take who we were, who we are now, and figure out a new, better, improved version of us, and then there are those are are those times where we can apply this definition that says to restore to a former state, where I would say that that former state is more of the foundational state, a stra a a structural state. So I hope that makes sense. I just kind of wanted to expand upon that definition more. But I've already hinted at this, but I'm sure when you hear uh the word renovate or renovating, if you're like me, your mind goes straight to HGTV or houses or spaces, right? You start to probably see the cabinets and the counters, it could just be me. But that's what what comes to mind, and that's what's most associated with renovating, and rightfully so, right? Um, HGTV is huge in its own right, but also flipping houses became a thing not too long ago, and it's not uncommon to meet everyday people who flip houses. So when you hear renovating, that's kind of what we um associate with uh renovating, probably first, probably before anything else. You wouldn't think to say renovating the soul, you would think renovating a house or a space, right? If someone said, I'm renovating, your mind's nine times out of ten gonna go to ten times out of ten gonna go to, oh, they're renovating their house, or there's or a new space or something like that, right? But just as renovating a physical space um involves repairing and upgrading and enhancing like a structure or or an appear or or like bringing you know certain appearance, bringing it up to date, uh renovating the soul is a similar process, and so I want to take this the the practical and everyday idea of renovating a house or a space, and I want to um use that as an analogy for renovating our souls. And so I have been, if you can tell, I've been on my HG TV kick. Now I did not grow up an HG TV girl, I really didn't get into HG TV until my adulthood because I couldn't really relate to them buying houses and changing houses and selling houses and house hunters. My mom's always been into that to that stuff and to those shows, but I just could not get into it. But it wasn't until my adulthood, and still until we started, you know, looking at houses, and I started. This is a little tidbit about me. I think I've already said this, but I started doing like design um and sims and and just kind of seeing how much fun it was to upgrade something or to take an empty space and add your own flair. And I probably did more interior design than renovating in these last few years. I really gotten into HG TV, but I have specific shows that I watch, so my absolute favorite show is Unsellable Houses. Unsellable Houses is amazing. First of all, if it it is so um based on it's based in my home state of Washington, which I don't know if there's been another HG TV show in Washington, or if if there's one currently, I don't know one that this is the one that I found. They're twin sisters, Leslie and Lindsay, and they are probably the funniest people that you'll see on TV. I really just love them. So, but what they do on Incellable Houses is they sell homes, they renovate homes because I have a real estate company, and then they they renovate homes and then they do the interior design or the staging for the homes. And the homes that they renovate, they're typically older, they're built in the 70s and the 80s and in the 90s. And though every home is not still stuck in that year, so some people have tried to renovate themselves. What happens is these people typically put their house on the market and it doesn't sell for a period of time. That's when they call Leslie and Lindsay and they say, Hey, my house has been on the market for 30 days, 60 days, 15 days, and it's not selling. We're not getting people in. Like, could you all come in and take a look at our space? And so Leslie and Lindsay come in, they walk the house, they look at the the the the uh the spaces, right, that need to be updated. And the houses require anything from simply painting a room, right, to repairing the roof to structural damage and corrections that usually are not found until they actually start the renovation process. But I'm just saying not to say it can require some of the most basic things and it can require some of the most costly things. Um, and then they do spaces that are small, they do spaces that are large, but they really focus on the whole house. So they look at the inside, the the front yard, the backyard, and they're really big about curb appeal. Look at me using my HGTV real estate uh lingo, but they're really big about like curb appeal, which I which I love too, is that they focus on the whole house because I've seen other shows where they don't they won't touch the backyard, they won't touch the front yard, right? They'll just renovate the inside. But Leslie and Lindsay really do um try to look at the whole house in order to get it to sale. Um, they do this, they put a portion of their money into, I don't want to get like too deep into the weeds about the show, so you have to watch it, but they put a portion of their money into the um renovation process, and so that kind of uh build, I think that it creates more incentive and buy-in from the seller to have them on board because Leslie and Lindsay they're gonna invest their own money, and then at the end, they're gonna their their goal is to sell the house for higher than what the sellers were trying to sell it for, so that they get back their investment. But not only do they get back their investment, but then there's money left on the table for them and the sellers to switch, and that's what got me on it. Like, y'all, they they them houses in the first couple seasons were selling for so much. I was like, no way, what kind of trickery, sorcery, weird stuff is going on with this because this is crazy, but they're really good at what they do. They're some of the top um real estate agents at the I can't remember if they said I think they said in the Pacific Northwest, and it shows it shows those girls are absolutely amazing, and they know the Washington market so well, and so the um so kind of looking at that, right? These houses I always think about this like the houses that they're renovating were once top of the line for their time, but now there's a new market, right? With a new style, and there's a new generation of people who are buying homes, and it doesn't matter if that's from 2021, 2022, 2023. It's almost as if because I think that there's about three or four episodes of I'm sorry, three or four seasons of the show, and each year has really been different, and you can see the trends take change, the times change, the buyers change, and where they're at in Washington, a lot of people are moving up there for tech, so there's a bigger price point that people can afford. People were buying houses um with cash, right? Um, so it's just interesting to see how things that used to work don't work anymore, and so practically, like I was saying, they will walk the house to see the current condition, they make a plan um that works with the budget, they look at the market and then they go to doing the work. But sometimes there are unexpected issues that surface, as I mentioned. So these things they don't always discover until after they start the renovation process, until they start pulling back the layers and pulling up the carpet and taking down the walls, right? And these can have a major effect, it's a significant effect on their budget, the timeline. And it sometimes in this last season has threatened the completion of a project or even threatened it being able to sell because that's how big um some of the issues have been, especially like I said, in this last season. And so now I kind of want to look at this correlation to us like what does this mean? How does this apply to us when we're talking about renovating the soul? What I love is that you can't just fix the surface level, you have to ensure the foundation is stable, and so not just with this show, but with other shows, when you do you don't see the inspections done, but there are inspections that happen because you cannot just start to renovate a home without knowing how it is structured, because you don't want to go in and take out a beam or uh a wall or something that is foundational to that um structure, which means if I take out that beam or I take out that wall, it could cause the floor to crumble or it could crop, you know, cause damage later on, right? And so you can't just go into the house and start tearing stuff up. You have to inspect it, you have to know the current condition, and you um can't just, like I said, fix the surface level. You have to ensure that the foundation is okay. And when you start to uncover those problems, once you once you get the plans and you get the blueprints and you understand how the house is structured, you still encounter issues because even when you have the blueprints, even when you have the plans, that doesn't tell you what has happened to that house in 20 or 30 or 40 years. You still have to wait and go along with the process to see what might be uncovered. And for us, the foundation is our soul, like the structure of the foundation is our soul. When we are renovating, we are making sure that our foundation is stable, and we can look at maybe the cabinets and the counters and all these and carpets and all these other things and painting, right? All of the things are part of the process as some of the other uh what's called faculties of our soul, right? So uh things that have been associated with our soul, courage, bravery, our mind, our beliefs, our thoughts, right? Making sure that all of these things are um addressed and that they're in the in proper order, but we first have to make sure that our foundation is stable. And so while we're not changing light fixtures or pulling up carpet, we are focused on various areas of our souls to renovate, improve, or bring back to life. So our renovating process, right, it would involve certain things, and we're gonna talk about a few of them. We're not gonna get into all everything, you know, obviously, but we're gonna get into a few of them. And one of the first things that we've talked about, probably on every single episode, is self-reflection or introspection or deep contempl contemplation. This is helping us to become more aware about what is happening in and around us, um, what is affecting our behaviors, our attitudes, feelings, and beliefs, right? Um, self-reflection can uh be in our quiet time, it can be when we're in the car, it it can honestly come up when we're uh when we do say something, right? I said something that was like, oh, why'd you say that? Or I did something, or something made me feel a kind of way. Like, why did why did that give me that feeling? But the idea when you're when you're talking about self reflection, introspection, deep contemplation, this isn't just in the Moment. This is creating intentional time to reflect, to go deeper, to contemplate on things that have happened, on things that you've done, on things that you've said, on things that have caused deep emotion or pain within you, right? It is a very intentional thing because I don't want to be, I don't want to mislead us into thinking that it's just while you're walking down the street. Or like I said, when someone does say something like, Yeah, I'm self-reflecting, like, no, you actually create space and time for yourself to go a little deeper, right? For yourself to self-reflect. You could stop at the end of the month and go, let's look back on what has happened, right? Or again, when things come up, we don't ignore them, we don't turn the blind eye. We do go deeper to say, oh man, I didn't realize that that bothered me. And instead of us ignoring it, which we're gonna talk about a little more in a second, but instead of us ignoring it, we sit, we reflect, we look within. And we're gonna talk more on another episode about specifically about reflection and introspection because I throw those words around a lot, but I really want to take a deep dive into those. But, anyways, that's one piece of our renovating process. Another piece is healing, right? Um, which is obviously easier said than done. But I know people who will say, I'm healed, and they ain't so you can't just say it, and it's not just one therapy session or one altar call or one, you know, book you read. Healing is a process, and like I said, it's easier said than done, but much of renovating our soul is um healing from old wounds and maybe even some new ones, right? Um, as well. But we're being honest about the things that have hurt us and are currently hurting us, and I think this is important because I guess you can probably tell from the way that I talk of who I'm kind of targeting, and I don't mean to say that in a way where I'm like saying that those who are not here cannot listen and enjoy and get something from the podcast, but I do hope that there are those people out there who have not been honest about their hurt, who have not taken the time to self-reflect, because this is for you. This is me encouraging you and trying to get you to see the importance of healing and self-reflection and renovating the soul because all of these things are components of it. When it comes to healing, um, I again I've seen and I've been guilty of not being honest about something hurting me. And in fact, it's kind of ironic. Today, I think my husband said to me, if you don't, if you don't, I forgot how he said it, but essentially he was telling me that when something upsets me or when something hurts my feelings, I need to say it. And to me, I'm like, not always. I think he said anytime something hurts your feelings, you need to say it. And I and that's that was with him, you know, but I but I but still I think that was such a reminder for me because I will suppress it, compress it, push it away. Um, I won't be honest that something has hurt me, and lately, and not with him, but lately I've tried to be more honest in the moment, at least with myself. I really haven't gotten to the place where I'm honest with other people that they have hurt me because sometimes I'm nervous about how they're going to respond, but I do like even with what what the conversation was surrounding with my husband, I knew what hurt me and that it hurt me. I just didn't voice that, I didn't say it because I'm like, I don't want to bring you into that process, I need to process it on my own, right? But we're in a marriage, we should communicate, it's a little different, and so I'm still working on that part of it of like, okay, I'm honest with myself, I'm telling, I'm letting myself know that yes, it hurt instead of running from it, instead of hiding from it, instead of cowering down and pushing it to the side, you know. Um, and so healing is another part of that renovating process. The next is personal development, which is probably one of my favorite pieces because we we never stop learning and growing or acquiring new skills. Um, it'll also have us setting goals and challenging our beliefs and expanding our perspectives, that personal development is not just you know climbing the corporate ladder or getting that promotion or reading a new book, right? That it's like I said, you're you challenge yourself, you challenge your beliefs in the way that you've been thinking, right? Um, just like we said with the first episode in uh why the soul matters, that so many of you all were like, huh, I never thought about the soul in this way. I never thought about you know renovating my soul or looking at my soul in this way, and that challenges your beliefs, that challenges your system, right? And you're open to it, you're setting goals for yourself. Um, I'm gonna talk about this later, but one of my it wasn't like a I didn't write it down or anything, but one of my goals was to get better at my road rage because I was just losing my mind. So one of my goals was to get better at my road rage, and that was the goal. But then from there, I had to make sure that every time I got in the car, I knew that that was my goal, and then I had to pay attention to how it was responding. Why did it make me so upset? Like, why? Like, that's that self-reflection, that's that getting down deep, right? Like, where is this frustration and this anger coming from? Is it really about the people cutting you off, or is it about something else, right? But, anyways, I'm just using that as an example to say that you know, we on this journey will never stop learning, we'll never stop growing, we'll never stop acquiring new skills, and I think that is something to be so excited about. It's my favorite part of being a human on this earth is that I don't have to reach a point where I'm you know done learning and done growing, I can always be learning and growing, and I can always be in a new season and be challenged, which doesn't always feel good, but it's good for me. Um, and although I grumble about this and I and I I grumble about this next one because when you Google the soul, a lot of like spiritual and religious stuff comes up, a lot of symbols, and it just makes me cringe, it's kind of annoying to me because your soul, if you believe that everyone has a soul, then everyone can be doing this work, and it's not just set aside for the few people who have religious beliefs or who um have you know a spiritual life or meditate or whatever, because those things are quite often associated with healing and renovating your soul and doing any kind of soul work, right? Um, when you and that's why I also well, what I was gonna say was um it's not just psychological either. That's why in the part two of this, when we talk about the soul, I want to talk about it from the philosophical view. I want to talk about the philosophical views that have aided all of us, honestly, in our understanding of the soul, because these men back in you know the eighth and fifth and ninth and fourth, I know I did those numbers all kinds of wrong, but back in those centuries um before Christianity, before a lot of our major religions, right? Before those things even came into fruition, these men were pondering and thinking about the soul and the the and there's this evolution of where they where their beliefs and understanding started and then how it evolved and what they came to understand and what they came to know. And so while I do not like the insinuation that the soul and soul work is only reserved for those who are religious or spiritual, that is a component of it, though, is that if you are um spiritual and if you are uh religious, that that you know your soul is connected to that deeply in a way, and that's gonna affect how you do this work, it's gonna affect how you see the world. Um, I am a Christian, right? So it does, I my beliefs on the soul, right, are tied to my spirituality. And I'm not saying that that's wrong, I'm just saying it doesn't only have to be that. I wouldn't look at the at an atheist and go, oh, you're an atheist, so you don't have a soul. I would never say that. I'll be like, you need to be working on your soul too. So that's what I'm saying is that whether you're Christian, Buddhist, Muslim, no religion, no God, whatever it is, like I still believe that you have a soul. Again, they may not believe that. And well, and I'm let me stop because I'm getting ahead of myself. But in the next episode, we'll talk about that. I'll just lay that there. There are a few more things, right? But those are the main things that I wanted to kind of highlight on what could be a part of our renovating process. Um, and it's not just uh these things either, but it's also some of the topics that we've already discussed. So paying attention to our projections and the things that we've allowed to be projected onto us, understanding that our bodily awareness starts within, and then also having to go through that process of grieving relationships, right? Which is also a part of a healing process for us because we don't always realize how much things or people have affected us and what has really attached itself to our souls until we start doing that self-reflection, that introspection and deep contemplation, right? And then from there you move into that healing process. And I think that this is all even a part of that personal development. That where do I go from there? Oh, I can set a goal, oh, it's challenging, or oh, it's uh moving me or affecting me in some way, right? And so, um, those things, the topics that we've covered so far, even are part of that renovating process, and with renovating the soul and with doing this kind of work, it requires what I would say is a higher level of accountability. I say higher level because from my observation in my little corner, my little chair, um, I see this generation and the generations coming behind getting into the trap of always being the victim. And so I say that this requires a higher level of accountability because it becomes less about being the victim and more about you and what you're gonna do. In fact, I think that when you do the renovating process, you actually have to admit more about yourself than you do about other people. Because it can start with someone else, but who is it gonna stop with? I don't think that it can start and stop with that person. It just doesn't always work like that. Especially if you're surrounded by people who are not interested in bettering themselves, who are not interested in renovating their souls, who are not interested in introspection or um addressing their anger issues or whatever it may be. It's difficult to try to say that I'm going to base my healing, my soul work off of what someone else has done to me. That I have to acknowledge what has been done. Absolutely. I have to acknowledge the hurt, I have to acknowledge the pain, but I can no longer leave my growth, my again, healing, um, my my trajectory in life, my path in life, right, into the hands of someone else. And so that's why I say it kind of requires this higher level of accountability. But so I think we have an idea, right? That we should move beyond the surface level. I think we have an idea that, but I think that that we have this idea of moving beyond the surface level when it comes to like fashion and our looks and beauty standards. So we're we're more progressive in a in a positive way, right? We're more progressive in that in that sense of like our culture, our workplaces, our homes, our churches, our relationships, right? We're become magazines, internet, TV. There's still a shallowness for sure, but I think that we are having more conversations about how you know beauty standards and fashion and makeup and all of these things don't necessarily define us. We get that when it comes to like moving beyond the surface level. But I wonder if we like do we equally realize that getting to the roots or the foundation of our addictions, our jealousy, our need for attention, um, anger, depression, loneliness, pride, uh, greed, shame, our passiveness, our people pleasing, um, the the disorders, right? The things that we've allowed to um overwhelm us and overtake us. I wonder if we equally realize that getting to the roots of these things, the why, the foundation, is also moving beyond the surface level. Because again, we're good at saying you're more than your looks, and you got something deep inside of you. You're not your clothes or your weight or your shoe size. I am not my hair, Indiari, right? Like, we're good at saying that for moving beyond the surface level, but are we really talking about that moving beyond the surface level, right? When we're talking about the renovating process, that we're not just looking at the top is also getting down deep into why am I addicted to you know, inserted here. That it's also like, why do these video games affect my moods, or you know, that it's also why am I so passive? Why am I a people pleaser? That asking those hard questions, right, and having to look at those qualities that are within us is also it's uh in my opinion, more important. Um, but it's equal to like that is moving beyond the surface as well. We don't always struggle with uncovering or realizing that we have that. You see, people make announcements about stuff all the time. I am depressed, I am depressed and I am anxious, I'm overwhelmed, I am passive, I do have an issue. But it's that's not the hard part. The hard part is not always saying I'm a people pleaser or I am struggling with X, Y, and Z. Or for admitting, right, or saying, like for me personally, that I'm bad at conflict resolution. It wasn't hard to say that I'm bad at conflict resolution. I have been saying that I was bad at conflict resolution for years. I've been saying that. What was difficult was actually sitting down and trying to address and figure out why I'm bad at conflict it or conflict resolution. It it was years of me saying it before I finally sat down late in my 20s and said, Why have I been saying this all this time? Because it took someone outside of me to say, You're not bad at conflict resolution. And I'm like, I've been telling myself that I was bad at conflict resolution for years, and I even knew the origin point. I knew that the reason why I thought I was bad at conflict resolution was because I'd never seen healthy, conf healthy conflict resolution growing up. I'm thinking that everything's gonna end in a fight, in an argument. I'm thinking that once I say something to this person, they're gonna blow up, and that's where the unhealthy side of conflict resolution came in for me. See, I could do conflict resolution, I could sit down, I could have the conversations, but it was the emotional aspect, the torment, the turmoil that it caused me before going into those conversations, and even after or even during that during those conversations, because my expectations was that man, if I say this, they ain't gonna take no accountability, they gonna yell, they gonna cuss, they gonna fight. Like, I'm not trying to fight today, okay. You know, like it was because it was those things that then kept me from actually speaking up or saying my truth or saying how a situation really affected me, right? And then I would leave that and say, dang, I should have said da da da da da. And so it was that part of comp that's why conflict resolution was hard for me. That's what I thought, that's why I kept saying I was bad at conflict resolution, was because of what was happening within me, not because I couldn't sit down and do it, and not because I couldn't help other people do it, but because of the emotions that it would evoke in me prior to having those conversations, and then even after. And so then what happened is that I started observing people who were good at conflict resolution, but a lot of what they gave me, their tips, started from within, it started from their confidence, from their patience, from their value or their worth. Why is it important that this conflict is resolved? And not every conflict was equally as important to these people either. I'm just saying that to say that um when we are moving beyond the surface level, we have to go beyond just saying and admitting things. We actually need to again go back to that self-reflection, that introspection, that deep contemplation where we sit down, and I like to say we sit in it and we think about it and we get to the root and we just uncover that part, and that part in itself can be really hard because even though it was easy to pinpoint and say, Oh, yeah, I know that I've seen I've not seen healthy conflict resolution in my life, like ever, in personal relationships. Um, I have not seen that ever, and that what was considered conflict resolution was really just sweeping things under the rug. I knew I didn't want to do that, but I also didn't know a better way, right? And so, my again, my point in saying that is that we when we're digging deep and we're moving beyond the um surface level and we're peeling back the walls and peeling back the layers as we would do and for renovating a home, but when we're renovating our souls and really peeling this stuff back, we don't just stop at looking at the problem. See, in a house, they can't just uncover, I should say they shouldn't just uncover an issue that needs to be fixed and then walk away, whether they did it or not. And I say that because there are things that have happened to us that we didn't necessarily put on us or in us, I didn't put myself in an unhealthy conflict resolution environment. It's what I was handed in this life, but when I recognized how it has affected me, I shouldn't, even though I did, ignore it for years upon years, claiming things that were not true, right? Or claiming the wrong part because I never took the time to actually sit down and think about why do you think you're bad at conflict resolution? Why do you think you're bad at this, and then go to okay, I understand that it was your environment, but there's something else that happens to you specifically, nothing that you can blame on your family or friends or church life or whatever, however, you grew up, it's like something happened to you. Like, what step are you missing? Why is this affecting you so much, right? And so the same thing with renovating the house, like I was saying. I again I've been on my HGTV kick and I've watched them pull back walls and see water damage, or pull back, you know, foundations and see something. And I don't think it's just because the cameras are on. At least I like to hope that it's not just because the cameras are on, but when you uncover something, you shouldn't just go, oh, they got water damage, let's patch it back up. And that has actually been the case. There were people who had done work before those people did, and they did leave things damaged, they did uncover things and not fix it, right? And then what happens? Does it get better? No, it only gets worse, and that's why you have to um fix it because even though it may not have affected the quality of living up until that point, it's not going to get better, it's actually going to keep getting worse, and then the damage could be irreparable. Is that the word? The damage could then it could be so far gone that they can't even fix whatever the situation is, or it could cause more damage because you didn't address it then and there. And that's what happens to us when we recognize things, right? And things keep coming up for us, and we keep saying things and professing things and admitting things, but we're not actually really digging deep down, those things don't just flutter away and get off of us, they actually intensify that over time what we've been saying we're so bad at, my depression, my whatever, you just you're letting it sit there, you're letting it sit there and lie dormant and trying to patch it up with things and people and places and travel and pictures and whatever it is, relationships, you're trying to patch it up with all of these things, not realizing that by patching it up, you're actually doing more damage than if you would just stop, recognize it, and fix it, right? And it's and that's and that's hard. It's not easy to just fix something, that's not an overnight thing for us. Now, and when you're renovating a house, they can just boop boop boop boop. But for us, and I would say even for the for the houses too, suppressing things does not get rid of them. Well, so I want to give this definition of suppression. Suppression is the conscious, intentional exclusion from consciousness of a thought or feeling. Another definition is to inhibit the growth or development of. I'm big on definitions. I'm big on unpack the unpacking words because and defining words because we use a lot. Of terms, and we don't know what they mean, and baby, you you can look in social media comments, Instagram comments, and see that people just be using all kinds of stuff out of context because they don't know what they're talking about. So it's important for me to define certain terms. So I'm gonna read that again. Suppression is the conscious, intentional exclusion from consciousness of a thought or feeling to inhibit the growth or development of. So there's psychological suppression that and there's different versions of suppression. So we're talking about more psychological suppression, right? This emotional part of it that refers to um push down things, right? Or ignore certain thoughts, feelings, memories, or impulses. And this can also be like for me, I think this is how it was for me with a lot of things, a defense mechanism where you're trying to cope with something, um, or you're trying to avoid dealing with the uncomfortable emotions or experience or distress that comes with it. That is me, like I can't I already said that that I ignore, I suppress because I am I feel like I'm uh helping myself not get to a place where I don't want to go, right? But suppression is not it's it's not it's not healthy, and there's a difference between repression and suppression. Um, they're oftentimes used interchangeably, but repression and suppression have slightly different meanings in psychology. So repet repression involves unconsciously pushing unwanted thoughts or memories out of awareness, while suppression, what we're talking about, involves a more conscious and effort to push them away. So consciousness is the quality or state of being aware, especially of something within oneself. It's also defined as awareness, and it is the normal state of conscious life. Conscious is perceiving, apprehending, or noticing with a degree of controlled thought or observation. Simply put, it means that we are aware that we are making the intentional conscious decision to push something away, to ignore it, um, to ignore what it how it affects us, to ignore how it's bothered us, to ignore whatever it is, to not say anything, to not do anything. We'd rather suppress it and push it away for whatever your reason may be. It could be a defense mechanism, it could just be what you're used to, right? Um, but then this and when you look at the renovation process, right? Even though that's not a psychological thing, they will still they it's still you're aware. You are aware that there is an issue, and then you patch it up. And it's the same thing with us. We are aware that there's an issue, but I consciously, I am aware, I know that I'm pushing this down. It's not repression, it's suppression. I I consciously am pushing this away and and and putting it down and pushing it to the side. I don't want to deal with it, I don't want to deal with how it makes me feel. And let me just say this: that is okay sometimes. It is okay sometimes. If you are at a party and you feel like somebody then stepped on your toe or did something that's gonna bring you out of character, right? Like there are times when I think that that is okay to do, but I do not think it should be our pattern of life. I do not think that we should always go around suppressing things and never pulling them up and addressing them, right? So I say all of that to say that being an active participant and renovating our souls means that we don't just ignore or suppress things, and it doesn't mean that we um stop at basic awareness or admitting, like I said earlier, yeah, we can say that we're something and we can be aware that we're something, but we don't just stop there in the renovating process. No, we keep digging, we keep asking, we keep discovering, we keep trying to figure out, right? Um, we peel back, we do the hard work, we pay attention, we get involved, um, not only to just identify the issues, but to address them as well, and to try to start that healing process where needed and where necessary, or to um set goals that will then help us to uh restore, repair, right? Improve, become better, right? Um, I like to we always say that this is work, and I love the analogy of the renovation process because you can't come to the renovation site in your heels or your best dress shoes or your best sneakers. You gotta come ready to work, you gotta come ready to use your hands, you gotta come ready to pick up a tool, and that's the same thing with this renovation process. It's not just this cute little like when you Google it, it's so cringy to me. But it's not just this, like, oh, we're going to a meditation routine and we're gonna dig down deep and we're gonna admit some things, and then we're all gonna leave and we're all gonna forget what we did because this really didn't help anything anyway. Like, it's not just this five-second, five-minute thing, and it's not, and I I want to be careful in saying this, but it's not even just um, like I said, reserved for going to church or wherever your spiritual, you know, gatherings may be, right? It's not just reserved for those moments because I again I am a Christian and I don't see other Christians doing this. I don't see an emphasis in churches talking about digging deep in your soul, right? Everyone's still stuck on the surface level, everyone's still talking about you know politics or or how you treat your neighbor, or uh they're they're just talking about, oh yeah, don't come in with a mask on, come as you are. What does that mean? What does that really mean? Like, how are you really here to help me and and aid me? And so we um so so I I love that in the renovating process, we're really talking about doing the work, like getting our hands dirty, getting involved, digging deep, right? Not staying where we've been, not staying where we've been. It is it is um so important to our entire lives. I chose unsellable houses specifically as the example and the analogy because they don't um tear down the entire home and they're also not dealing with homes that are completely damaged either. They're working with structures that have existed for years, with people who have been living in them, surviving in them for years, and now they're tasked with renovating it. And this is true for us as well. Many of us have been on this earth for a while, whether that's 15 years, 20 years, 30 years, 50 years, 60 years, 40 years, right? We've been on this earth in these bodies for years, and we've had to face uh like we talked about with the markets, right? We've had to face bad seasons, we've faced great seasons, we've had to face um a lot of issues and remedies, we've had to face uh hard, you know, betrayal, right? And hurt and pain. We've had to face losing relationships, we've had to face the fact that we've caused hurt and damage to other people. We've had to look at our lives and say, Wow, I really messed up there or I missed out on these opportunities. Um, and so when we're talking about renovating our souls, for many of us, we're starting from years of things that have already happened. We're not starting fresh, like just got here to earth, like in the movie Soul. Like we're not like, yep, just got here, time to time to do this thing. Like, no, we're starting from years of things that have already been a part of our structure, our foundation. We are starting um from a place where things have already attached themselves to us, where we've already been in environments where we've already allowed things to develop us, right? And we cannot just simply tear ourselves down and start over. Like I was talking about earlier with that definition of going back to a former version of us. We can't just snap our fingers and go, yep, 20-year-old me with her head on our shoulders, let's start over. As much as we want time travel to be a thing, and as much as I love movies where they get to go back in time and you know, do over and get another chance. We that is not our reality, it's just not. We haven't figured out the quantum time zone that Marvel was stressing me out about because I had it was just confusing. Um, anyways, but but we we don't have that, right? So we are not just tearing our entire selves down and starting over. We're starting from a place, um, for we're starting from a place, we're starting from a structure, we're starting from a foundation that has already existed for years, and we're looking at what do we keep, what do we get rid of? Because, like I said with the syllable houses, not every room has to be touched, not every room or space needs to be renovated, and that's the same with us. We don't have to go through our entire lives and say, gotta change this, and I gotta change this, and I gotta change this, and I gotta change this. And I would also add that we don't always have to start with the biggest issue, we don't always have to start with the thing that we know bothers us the most or has kept us help bound the most because sometimes that is really hard to jump into. It's sometimes best to start with maybe a work issue that came up, right? Or maybe an issue with a friend, or maybe an issue that you just realized you have, like with my road rage, it's not a big deal, but that affects so much in my life, and it showed me that I can change. It made me believe that if I can actually get better at road rage, what else could I get better at? So we don't always have to start with the biggest thing, like we don't always have to jump to the roof, you know. We can start with maybe just a little pain. We can start with something that you know is not the end all be all, but that does matter and that does affect us from time to time, and then we can build our way and work our way up to um addressing those bigger things, right? And I've been thinking lately about and experiencing how renovating our souls is not just for right now, and that's also why I don't think we have to necessarily jump in and put our claws into the biggest problem in our lives, um, because we may not actually see immediate payoff or benefits. This is that's actually why I don't go to the gym, I don't work out because why am I working out for two, three weeks and I don't see a six-pack? That's crazy. But but the but not getting those immediate rewards and benefits, it can be another aspect of this process that really makes it difficult and undesirable because it is a lot of work. But I've been saying this so much lately is that it's more of an investment, and you can't go wrong with investing in yourself, no matter what season of your life you're in, good, bad, up, down, someone left you, you got a new person, uh, someone at your job is acting crazy, whatever it is, like you can't go wrong in wanting to better yourself, you can't go wrong in wanting to renovate your soul and invest in yourself. You can't, and you can't. I was I was saying this to my little cousin because I was telling her that I wish in my time of singleness that I realized this. That I realized that if I was taking the time to invest in me, if I took the time to just love on me, to look deeper, to try to sort through some of my issues instead of trying to be in a relationship, baby, I couldn't have gone wrong. So I do still stand by like investing in yourself in a healthy and a right way. You can't go wrong. And that's what this process is as well. And it's not just for the past. It is like I said, it's not just about uh um what we've been through, and it's not just about right now, but it's also for the future. It's um yeah, it's not just reflection and introspection for what I've been through, but also for what I'm going through or what I might go through, that I'm not just sitting down and doing the work because of you know the things that happened then, because what happened then could come back and happen again. How are you gonna respond? When situations come up, when memories surface, when um, like I said, if you've been working on something right, and and and or someone you haven't seen in a while that you had a fallen out with and you see them, are you still in fight mode or are you like at peace because you dealt with those things? So I like to say that this renovating the soul process again is not just for the past and it's not even just for right now, it's really for the future. If you have kids, it could also be for your children, for them to see and them to have an earlier start than many of us have had. I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm responding differently, not just from the outside anymore, but from within. That yeah, I might go up and um like yeah, I may respond differently from the outside, but on the inside it's still a struggle for me, it's still a struggle for me. But no, when I'm renovating and doing the real work, that even the things that used to bother me on the inside don't bother me or offend me anymore. That is not that again going back to my little road raise example, that it's not just about oh, I stopped hunking my horn and I stopped cussing people out, but actually it doesn't even bother me that they cut me off. Now, dangerous stuff and crazy dumb people still bothers me, but you know, those little things that used to bother me don't bother. I don't take cutting me off personal anymore. I don't take, you know, someone hunking at me personal anymore, although don't do that. But so how much have I changed? I don't know. No, I'm just kidding, but seriously, like like I don't those things don't have to um offend me and affect me from within, even if my outside response might have changed first, which is okay, that can be the first change, but the real change is how I'm responding from within. They're not gonna see that, they're not gonna feel that. It's not gonna be for them, it's gonna be for me. And so renovating now, doing this work now. Why is renovating so important? Doing this work now helps us with our lives later and forever. It's not just about like a four-month journey or an eight-month journey, it's a lifestyle. This is a lifelong thing of renovating our soul because our our eye, like what we see, how we see things, our spirit, our skills, our emotions, they sharpen and we begin to see earlier signs of things. We begin to um see the same predicaments that that we've worked so hard to get out of. We start to see signs earlier than we did before. So then we know, hey, like this, this is this is taking me back, or this is something I can already see is gonna happen, and I don't want any parts because I know where I belong. Like, like experts, experts get better time, right? You sharpen those skills, you get better with time, and you start to be able to respond faster, you start to be able to even help other people, right? Like I said, if you have children, you have family who don't know how to do this, they may see your growth, you know, they may not, but let's say they do, let's say the close friends, they're like, Wow, you used to go off about that, and now you don't even say anything, and you can say, Yeah, well, it doesn't bother me, right? So it's not just about you, it's not just about now, it's about later and forevermore. So I'm gonna use this last example and then I'm gonna close up and we're gonna get out of here. But there was, I I want to say this like you're not always gonna get this right, and I want to share the story really fast that there was a Christmas where it's Christmas at my grandma's house, and I started to see the signs of an argument developing, and I started to see that this is not about to be good, this is not gonna end well. And I was sitting next to my little cousin, and I was like, Oh, it's time for me to go. And she didn't see what I was seeing, but I was like, Oh, it's time for me to go, and I didn't really move. I have to I didn't really like actually get up. I kept saying, like, oh, okay, I need to leave. I probably said it a couple times, and then as I started to gather my stuff, because I did stall, that's what I'm saying, you're not always gonna get it right. I did kind of stall because I wasn't 100% confident, but I knew what I knew if that makes sense. Um, and so I started to get my stuff, but by the time I started to get my stuff, all hell had broken loose. And I still think about that periodically to this day, of like what would have happened if I would have just got out of there when I knew and when I seen the signs, because then I ended up getting involved in the argument, and you know, that's why that's why it was that's why I was trying to get out of there is that it was also dealing with me. Um, and so or I put myself in it, actually, I should say it like that, like you know, and that was that was a telltale sign for me that I knew this is not how I want to go back into this situation, but unfortunately, because I didn't listen to myself, trust myself, and you know, keep learning from what from the experience that I'd already had, I sat there and then got involved in something that I didn't necessarily need to be involved in. And so I shared that because I was better at seeing things, and this is not a diss to my cousin at all. It she couldn't see what I could see because I started paying attention to certain things and certain elements and listening differently, right? And again, she's younger than me, it's not a diss to her at all. I didn't expect her to know or see, but even when we talked about it later, she was like, I didn't know what you were talking about. I didn't know why you kept saying you had to go. She's like, I thought you were just saying you had to leave because you just had to leave. And I'm like, nah, girl, I saw it festering, I heard it coming, I felt it coming, like, but no, I really did like hear this stuff, right? And um uh, and so I I if I would have just trusted myself and walked away, like what would that outcome have been? Okay, so let's wrap it up. Renovating is a daily, weekly, monthly, yearly, and practical thing, right? It's something that we're gonna be doing and should be doing for the rest of our lives. It doesn't always have to be daunting, you don't always have to try to renovate every area and aspect of your life, right? Um, and we're not always gonna get it right. But I wanted to put this in the form of the analogy to show the practical side because again, like I said, you Google the soul, some weird stuff, and just kind of all these associations come up. Um, but when I was talking about, and in part two, we're gonna talk about this more. This contemplating the soul, thinking about how your soul affects your life, it was normal, it was practical to be thinking about the soul. Um, they they talked about the functions, how it works, and the fact that you can have a good soul, you can have a bad soul, right? What qualities is associated with and how the soul affects how we think, how we behave, what we feel, how we respond, how we treat others, how we lead, love, and rule. That the soul is responsible for so much of who we are in our in our day-to-day activities, that that is why those men took the time to contemplate and ponder, write about and and think about and provide logical evidence and arguments for the soul. And so stick around with our two for sure. But thinking of it um as renovating should hopefully paint this picture that we have to get down and dirty, and we have to plan and we have to be aware, and we have to learn, and we have to strengthen our skills, and we will struggle, and we also don't have to do it alone. I I haven't seen not one renovation show where one person is doing all the work for a renovating project. Um, we don't have to do it alone, we won't always get it right. And and like I said, every area doesn't require our attention and our time, but it's a process. We have to have patience with ourselves. Um, please have patience with yourself, be gracious with yourself, be gracious with others because some people again they they don't have they're not privy to this. I was thinking about something I seen the other day, and I thought that person probably it doesn't have access or is not even in a mental space where they could stop and listen to a podcast like this. Like they're not thinking about a podcast, they're not thinking about a self-help book, they're in so much d turmoil and distress because of their situation and what they're going through that they can't do this, so be gracious to others because you don't know what they're going through, and everyone doesn't have the privilege of you know getting listening to a podcast and getting a book and doing this kind of work, it just doesn't happen. But that's also why you can use these skills and you can use your own process, your own story, your own journey to help those who don't have access to it, right? Um, so remember that there's a lot of things that are outside of your control, and when it gets hard to take a break, uh stop, rest, and when you can reconvene. Don't push yourself beyond where you can go. And it's and let's wrap this up with saying that renovating the soul is essential for many reasons. It is the the number one being that our soul is responsible for so much of our our lives, that it's responsible, it's the foundation of our lives, let's say it like that. Um, but also because we don't just renovate for for today, but for tomorrow, for next year, for forever, and that it's not just for ourselves, um, and it it can help other people and influence other people, right? That that renovating our soul is for the surprises, for the rude comments, for the stares, for the for the people who cut you off, for the betrayal, right? But for the goals, um, for your celebrations, for your wins. Like you, you're this is not all bad. There are things that make a Happy that we can look at and celebrate and embrace, right? That wow, that made my soul just jump and leap. What is that? I want to keep doing that. That through this, you can discover your passions and the things that you were meant to do and the reason why you were put on this earth, right? So it's not all daunting, it's not all bad, it's not all, you know, like you know, peeling things back and finding bugs and roaches and water damage, but you could find something beautiful, right? Some one of the things that is often found in when you renovate a home is you um take that carpet and you will find original hardwood floors, and those are like gold, right? So it's not always finding um bad things, but renovating the soul is everything, it is our lives. And there's this store, this is lady that is coming back in my mind, and it's just bugging me, so I'm gonna end it with this. There was a young lady that I follow, her name is Chesley Christ, and I think about her often because she committed suicide, she jumped off of her apartment building in New York, and Chesley. I always forget which one she was, but she was the year that like Miss America, Miss USA, Miss Teen USA, I think like all of them were uh black women, and I cannot remember which one Chesley was. I always get it mixed up. She was either Miss America, Miss USA. I don't think she was Miss USA. I want to say maybe she was Miss America, I think. Don't I don't quote me. Um, but I f I started following her, and then she just had this big, bright, outgoing personality. You would have looked at her and thought that she was had a perfect life, honestly. Like you would have looked at her and said, she's living her dream. She was an anchor on E, I think. Um, and she you know, was she was a a uh what's it called? A talk host, not a spokeswoman. I don't know what they're called when they when they host the show, but she was um doing that, and again, she she was she won one of the largest pageants in you know that are out there, right? Like she reigned and did that for a year, and then she went on to lead a successful career and she was super successful before that. And when she jumped and she died, it was so it was like one thing to find out she died, it was another thing to find out that she committed suicide, and to hear the people around her say that they didn't really see the signs, they didn't know um what was happening, and it I that broke my heart for weeks. I normally don't cry over people that I don't know, and I don't think I had cried over a death since Whitney Houston, but that tore me up because I would have never guessed that someone like her would be that I don't want to call I I don't want to say unsatisfied, but just that broken, that hurt, that hopeless that you would take your own life in such a way when she was she was such a light to people that didn't know her, to the people that did know her, but I think about this all the time. I think about even like Marilyn Monroe, um and I and I've wrote a blog about this of you know these people who we look at and say, Wow, they must be they're living a dream, they have everything that they could possibly have, and they've they're reaching their goals and they're doing the things, but inside is a totally different story. Inside lives a person who is not happy, who is not living a dream, who was living a nightmare, and that's why I believe in this work so much for the Chesleys, for the Marylands, for even the Twitches, right? For the people who just feel like there's no other option, like who are not encouraged that life is a process and that depression doesn't always have to be your story, and that you can come alongside people who will uplift you and encourage you and be there to kind of like lift you up when you can't hold yourself up. It's not just do the work because we, you know, just do the work because I started the podcast. It's really from a place of deep passion and deep love for seeing people flourish, for seeing people not just happy but whole, and for seeing people overcome and overcome their struggles, overcome those addictions, and to see people um, you know, turn their weaknesses into strengths, and to realize how good it feels to grow and how good it feels to see that you're able to grow, and I'm gonna stop this because I'm getting emotional. Um, but that is where my that is where my heart is. I believe in this so much, um, because I hope that I can encourage someone who may be feeling like I don't know how to go from here, and I don't know how to do from here, and I don't feel like life is worth it, to say that life is a journey that you will always be growing. You don't have to feel like you've reached a peak, you don't have to feel like there's nothing more left for you to do on this earth, or that um, you know, there you that that you can never change or never overcome even some of the strongest and craziest demons, right? Um I just am crazy enough to believe that you can, and I'm crazy enough to want to be in the trenches and doing the work alongside you. That's why I always extend that olive branch, that I am not a podcaster or influencer, or it's on, you know, I'm not I'm not a guru, I'm not any of those things where you can't reach out and touch me and have a conversation and say, hey, I'm really struggling with this, like, you know, whatever it is, right? Or like, you know, how like how how would you respond to this? I want to be there for you all, especially for the people who don't have a lot of community and don't feel like they have that outlet. I hope that you all enjoy this episode. I know that it was a little longer, but that's on purpose because I was gone for so long. I wanted to give you all some really good meat and just a really good episode to chew on. And so, look out for part two where we're gonna talk more about the soul. I just hope that this gave you some nuggets. I hope that it made the renovation process and that renovating piece of renovating the soul a little more practical, a little more doable. Um, and now even when people ask you about it, you have something, an analogy that you could uh give them, right? Um, but I am just so excited, I'm so thankful that I'm back, and you know, you could you might be able to hear, you might not be able to hear, still struggling with a little congestion, but that's okay. I am so much better, and I'm just thankful that I was able to um finally get this out there, finally do this, and just be back with you all. So, thank you so much for listening. Thank you so much for your support. Um, reach out to me on social media, email me renovatingthe Soul at gmail.com if you have any questions, comments, or follow ups. So excited to do this first soul talk, and I hope that you will keep tuning in and share the podcast, like the podcast, rate the podcast on all your major platforms. Thank you all so, so, so, so much. Um, until next time, let's keep doing the work to renovate the soul.