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Christmas Fun
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Christmas Fun begins a 3 part series looking at the music of Christmas. We start it off having a little fun and maybe even get a wee bit silly. Hopoefully it will give you a little boost of energy to start off the holiday season.
This is Acoustic Avenue. I'm Ted Crouch, your host in Salmon Arm, British Columbia, with co-producer Joe Little in Calgary, Alberta. On Acoustic Avenue, we recognize with respect and gratitude that these lands where we live, work, and make our music remain home to a number of indigenous nations and people. We acknowledge this land out of respect for the indigenous nations who have cared for Turtle Island, also called North America, from before the arrival of settler peoples until this day. Here's Joe to introduce today's show Christmas Fun.
SPEAKER_00Hi everybody. Christmas. With respect to the poem The Twelve Days of Christmas, we're going to start today's show by offering up a dozen reasons why we believe in Christmas. Because when humans do something cruel or mean to other humans, there's always somebody who protests. Because miracles are more because when a sea creature, dumb and almost in, forms a hell around itself, it makes mathematically perfect worlds colors and mostly gloriously complex. Because when things are tough, there's always somebody who can make you laugh anyway. Because most of us feel guilty when we lie. Because if you can plant a sunflower seed in the ground, you can be sure that if anything comes up in the new way, it will most certainly be a sunflower seed. And when you double cross, you can come up with a fluid instead. Because of the way snowing crowds are the heart of the city. Because if you open yourself to it, you can commune with animals, and even with plants and other forms of life, because it eventually goes away. Because even if some people believe that it is a legendary, not precisely. And of course, because the music of Christmas are performed in everything. Every style you can imagine. The arrangement from the ridiculous to the rubber and everything in the code. Today is the first of a three-part series looking at the music for Christmas. We thought we'd start off having a little fun, and maybe even get a weed of the hopefully it will give you a boost of energy for the holiday season. All I want for Christmas is a review from follow that up with I'm dressing up like Santa. When I get out of the room by the Bob Rivers and Human Core, and the trackers will close this with the Santa Claus.
SPEAKER_03Grandma got run over by a reindeer. Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as Santa. But as for me and grandpa, we believe she'd been drinking too much eggnog. And we begged her not to go. But she forgot her medication. And she staggered out the door into the snow. When we found her Christmas morning at the scene of the attack. You can say there's no such thing as stand up. But as for me and grandpa, we believe. See him in there watching football. Drinking beer and playing cards with cousin Mel. It's not Christmas without grandma. All the family's dressed in black. And we just can't help but wonder Should we open up her gift or send them back? Grandma got run over by reindeer. Walking home from our house Christmas Eve. You can say there's no such thing as Santa. But as for me and grandpa we believe. Now the goose is on the table. And the pudding made a fig. And the blue and silver candles that would just have matched the hair in grandma's wig. I warned all my friends and neighbors. Better watch out for yourself. They should never give a license to a man who drives a sleigh and plays with L. Grandma got run over by reindeer. Walking home from our house, Christmas E. You can say there's no such thing as Santa. But that's for me and Grandpa Weaver Lee. Grandma got run over by reindeer.
SPEAKER_08Walking home from our house, Christmas E. You can say there's no such thing as Santa. But that's for me and Grandpa Weaver Lee.
SPEAKER_21All I want for Christmas is my two frantic Ma two Frontieth. See my two front teeth. If I could only have my two franctions, then I could whip you merry Christmas. It seems so long since I could say Sister Susie's sitting on the center sous. Every time I try to speak, all I do is whistle. All I want for Christmas is with two front teeth. My two front teeth. My two front teeth! If I could only have my two front teeth, then I could win see Mary Crips. And oh reindeer! Hey, you're still bringing lots of toys and candy. But now when I run out of sight and how our Bimps are Brips are not a bimps and none of them could understand me. Oh no one for crimson's my two front teeth. My two front teeth. If I could only have my two front teeth, then I could whimps Mary Grips.
SPEAKER_04Mary Crimson I'm dressing up like Santa Claus on Christmas. As soon as I can get out on parole, I'll hang out on your street. Your kids I'd love to meet. As soon as I get out of this rat hole, And I won't mind just sliding down your chimney. Cause I just spent 15 years to help a go. I'm dressing up lights and applause on Christmas. As soon as I can get out on parole. Boot it up in red and white. Instead of these old tight. Just think of how surprised they're gonna be. I'll play it, boys. Cause the warden's watching everything I do. Thank God he didn't see that fight instead of like three. Or I'd be stuck here till I'm 92. Just a few more questions from that nice committee. Then through those rusty gates around this crow. And I'm dressing up like standard flow don't fail. As soon as I can get out on parole. Just as soon as I can get out on parole.
SPEAKER_17I'm home. Just pull your chair up close to your radio. Tune it up, run loud, tune it up, run loud, tune it up, running loud, tuning it up, running loud, tuning it up, running loud.
unknownI'm home now.
SPEAKER_08Well I don't know, but I've been told there's something going on at the North Pole. Standing in itself sat a factory. Dance around the world's biggest Christmas tree. They're doing a Santa Claus booker. It's a Santa Claus boogie. You gotta take some time to believe in Santa Claus. Uncle Henry's gotta have a bad back when he tries to walk and hear him pop and crack. But at Christmas time, the spirit stands and free. He jumps and hollers doing a Santa Claus boogin. Santa Claus boogin. Santa Claus booget You gotta take some time to believe in Santa Claus. I knew an Indian girl, she was way too young. She liked to talk dirty in a native tongue. You never see no butter shaking shimmer Like an Indian dancer doing a Santa Claus book. It's a Santa Claus book. It's a Santa Claus booget. Oh no witch. Y'all believe in the stand of club? It's a stand of call. You gotta take some time to believe in Stanicla. It's a Stanicall. You gotta take some time to believe in Stanicla. You gotta take some time to believe in Stan Claw.
SPEAKER_12This is Acoustic Avenue. The songs in this next episode bring joy during the Christmas season by offering a mix of nostalgia and humor and energy and heartwarming things. And playful, cheeky, and flirtatious take on the Christmas season. From the perspective of someone asking Santa Claus for extravagant displaying a sense of humor and lightheartedness. Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, written in 1939, was recorded by Jean Audrey in 1949. Today we'll play Leonard Skinner's version, recorded almost eighty years after the original was first written. And we end the set with a song that gets you dancing and in the festive spirit, with an upbeat of a rock and roll Christmas song infusing the holiday spirit with energy and excitement from Chuck Berry on Run, Rudolph Run.
SPEAKER_18Santa baby, just slip a sable under the tree for me. Been an awful good girl, Santa Baby. So hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa baby, a 54 convertible to light blue. I'll wait up for you, dear Santa baby. So hurry down the chimney tonight. Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed. Next year I could be just as good if you check off my Christmas list.
SPEAKER_14Boom boom, boom, boom.
SPEAKER_18Santa baby. I want a yacht, and really that's not a lot.
unknownBoom boom.
SPEAKER_18Then an angel all here sent a baby. So hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa honey. One little thing I really need, the deed. To a platinum mine, Santa baby. So hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa Cutie and fill my stocking with a duplex and checks. Sign your ex on the line, Santa Cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight. Come and trim my Christmas tree with some decorations bought at Tiffany. I really do believe in you. Let's see if you believe in me. Santa baby. Forgot to mention one little thing. A ring. I don't mean on the phone, Santa Baby. So hurry down the chimney tonight. Hurry down the chimney tonight. Hurry tonight.
SPEAKER_08Oh ho ho Dashing through the snow. Oh ho ho feel she got oh ho Stamps got your Oh eyes tell you eyes up cry eye eyes Cause all those choice you fly Oh no, oh no Stretch you know
SPEAKER_10Well he read the letter I wrote him And he was glad, glad, glad When he checks the little Who's naughty It makes him sad sad But he still loves me so Cause he's a telly old so kill you Oh yeah Santa under the tree Please please please please so good Santa Santa Santa Santa Big Foundation Rudolph the red nose reindeer had a very shiny nose And if you ever saw it you were sure to say it glow But all of the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names They never let poor Rudolph joining in the reindeer games But then one foggy Christmas Eve Santa came to say Rudolph with your nose so bright Won't you guide my sleigh tonight Then all the reindeer loved him as a shadow down with me Root the red nose reindeer you go down and kiss a ring within one foggy Christmas Eve Santa came to say Rudolph with your nose so bright Won't you guide my slate tonight then all the reindeer loved him and she shouted out with glee Rudolph the red nose reindeer You go down in his surprise That's right Out of all the rangers you know you're the mastermind Run run Rudolph Randolph ain't too far behind Run run Rudolph Father's gotta make it to town Can't you make him hurry telling he can take the freeway down Run run Rudolph Cause I'm reeling like a merry for time to the boy Tom What I've you've been hoping for All I'm want for Christmas is a rockin' roll like your And I'm weaving root on Within Like a shoe making hurry down and make a big free way down making free wave a very shooting A little baby down three And then a way we root up Real like a face for yeah Run run root up gotta make it to town Hotel make him hurry telling he can take the freeway down Run run root on I'm reeling like a merry go around Welcome back to Acoustic Avenue in the second half of our special today Christmas is fun in keeping with today's theme we continue to add a different humor celebrating yellow reference the weather outside was whitening till the dog did something frightening He's got no other place to go Yellow snow, yellow snow, yellow snow And he doesn't show signs of stopping As he slips around his dropping I see him everywhere you go in the snow, yellow snow, yellow snow When he finally goes outside, he'll be fro looking round in the storm He'll be like an eye-year with pride You can tell by the steam that it's warm When the snow begins its fighting It reveals those puppy drawings He's a frisky little booch and go Yellow snow, yellow snow, yellow snow Come here, yarn I'm a m good doggy Oh not on frosty He'll be marking our yard with pride You can tell by the steam that it's warm Where is happy and his hand's bagging But the snowman's left side is hanging There's a lane above the right below Yellow snow Yellow snow Yellow snow Yellow snow yellow snow Yellow snow Now baby doll sweet pie sugar plumed buttons angel face you know you better be good act like true fine love is sure Be careful what you said Santa Claus is watching you It's everywhere it's everywhere You better kiss me and hold me tight And give me good love in every night Cause you be strive to make me blue Co Santa Claus is watching you It's everywhere it's everywhere Well you may think you can sneak around and get away with something but there ain't no way Cause sign is no fool, he's really super cool, he's a secret head of CIA Crime don't pay. You can't do nothing because you're never alone, he's even got a white tap on your phone. So baby, if you ever do me wrong, break my heart and leave me alone. When Christmas comes, you be crying too because Well, for Christmas Eve, he climb on his flat full of tarts with the tulips outside, mirrors, the foxtails, butterflies, and leopards against the covers, and spread Christmas cheer to all the girls of boys. And it's the old nation, dancing, prancing, fixin', common, cupid's dining, blissin', bruise, marvin, and leon, and cleaters from George and Bill and Slick and do right, Fred Ace and Flying, Blackin' Dean Prince, fighting over Rudolph, stays on the stake out of your house. You can run, you can hide, but you can't get away. Got machinus, focus on you every day. So, baby, if you ever do me wrong, break my heart and leave me alone.
SPEAKER_02When Christmas comes, you're trying to. Cause Santa Claus is watching you.
SPEAKER_13He's everywhere, he's everywhere!
SPEAKER_02Yeah, Santa Claus is watching you.
SPEAKER_13He's everywhere, all I'm faster.
SPEAKER_09Santa Claus has got his eyes all over you, baby. It's over for you. You better watch out. Look out there, Santa Claus is peeping around the corner at you. You're in deep trouble, you know that? It's over for your kind. You go sneaking around here, you ain't gonna get away with it. You understand? I mean you got to be true blue through and through, cause Santa's gonna get you.
SPEAKER_06Frosty the snowman is a fairy tale they say. He was made of snow, but the children know how he came to life one day. There must have been some magic in that old silk hat they found. For when they placed it on his head, he began to dance around Oh Frosty the snowman was alive as he could be. And the children say he could laugh and play just the same as you and me. Now Frosty the snowman knew the sun was hot that day. And so he said, Let's run and we'll have some fun now before I melt away. Oh, down to the village with a broomstick in his hand, running here and there, all around the square, saying, catch me if you can. He led them down the streets of town, right to the traffic car. And he only paused a moment when he heard him holler, stop, stop, up frosty the snowstorm had to hurry on his way. I'm afraid, but he waved goodbye, saying don't you cry, I'll be back again someday. Thumpity thump thump, thumpity thump thump, look at frosty gold, upity thump thump, thumpity thump thump over hills of snow Just look at Frosty Gold.
SPEAKER_19Christmas presents come to everybody everywhere. Even jungle animals are sure to get the share Jungle bells, jungle bells, dingle dungle day. The animal Santa Claus is coming on his elephant's sleigh. Dingo dungo dingo day, dingle in a dungo day. He got an alligator bag for the crocodile's maw, a peppermint stick for the zebra's paw, a big met crack for the little chipmunk, and a cherry's a mole and the elephant's drunk. Dingo dumbo dingo ding, dingling a dumbble day. He got a vocal strick for the kangaroo, electric plants for a monkey too, a bottle of perfume for the lonely skunk, and a cherism-mole and the elephant's drunk. Dingo dumbo dingo day, ding-ling-dungo-day. Jungle bells, jungle bells, dingo dungle day. The animal Santa Claus is coming on his elephant's sleigh. Dingo dungo, dingo day, dingo dingo, dungo day. We got a raccoon coke for a teddy bear to wear, sweater for the camel, made a camel's hair, girdle for the hippo and that snow bunk. And carries a mole and the elephant's drunk. Dingo dungo dingo day, dingo, dungo, day. We got a dozen pair of shoes for a caterpillar's feet, an ice cream mug for the polar bear to eat. For the little billy goat, a sordid junk. And here's a mole in the elephant's drunk. Dingo dumbo dingo day, dingo-dungo-day.
SPEAKER_08He's making a list, he's shaking it twice. He's gonna find out who's naughty and nice. He's coming. He's coming. Santa Claus is a coming town. Yeah, he's coming. He's coming. Santa Claus is a coming town. He got little tin horns and little toy drums. A rumma to dude and a rumma tum tum. A cookie hit dolls at cotton goo. A eat a bunch of folks in a kid costume. He's coming on the town. So he's coming, boss coming town. Oh, Santa Clausy is coming down. Yeah, he's a coming sound, but it's coming to town. He's a coming soin. Yo, Santa Clausy is coming down. He's seeing the state nose on your way. Nose when you awake. And he knows if you made a bad hook, so we could say you better watch out, you better not clap. You better not power, I'm doing quiet. Make a least chicken twice. Oh, Santa Claus is coming down. Yeah, y'all, he's coming on. But he's coming down. Oh, Santa Claus is coming. Santa Claus is coming. Santa Claus is coming down.
SPEAKER_12This is the final set for today's special Christmas Fun. In our first of three Christmas specials, we hope these songs bring a sense of humor and silliness to. We begin the holiday season. The start is Bob Rivers with a chimney song. Playfully depicting a series of absurd and unexpected scenarios and unfortunate events and mishaps before in Santa as he tries to deliver the president and join the program with two songs. Playful and imaginative fantasy on Wouldn't it be fun to be Santa Claus and Christmas Island? A lighthearted song about the joys of Christmas on Chrome Island. We follow that with a heartwarming tale of Snoopy, the fictional dog from the penis comic engaging in a dog fight with the Red Baron during World War One. Snoobies of Christmas performed by the Royal Guardman. Before we start the music, we want to share with you our belief that music and songs have a way of providing a welcome break from the sometimes stressful or sentimental aspects of the season. And we encourage you to laugh and not take the holiday festivities too seriously.
SPEAKER_15There's something stuck up in the chimney, and I don't know what it is, but it's been there all night long. Well, I waited up for central Christmas night, but he never came. And it don't seem right that there's something in the chimney, and it doesn't make a sound, but I wish you a Merry Christmas. There's something stuck up in the chimney, and I don't know what it is, but it's been there all week long. Well, the dog is backing up the chimney flu. And we don't know what we're gonna do. Cause there's something in the chimney and it doesn't move around. And it's been a week since Christmas. There's something stuck up in the chimney, and I don't know what it is, but it's been there all month long. Well, it's jammed up tied above the fireplace. Now the house smells funny. Such a big disgrace that there's something in the chimney, and it doesn't talk at all. And it's been there since last Christmas. I'll be waiting up for Santa like I did last year. But my brother says he's already here. And he's stuck up in the chimney, and he doesn't say a word, and I'll be there every Christmas. And we'll have him every Christmas.
SPEAKER_21And live at the North Pole all year through. Making mud pies out of snow, tossing snowballs to and fro, decorating Christmas trees with Miss O Toe. Wouldn't it be fun to be Santa Claus's son? And work in Daddy's workshop night and day. I'd be the proudest kid around when the other kids all fun. I was driving father's reindeer sleigh. Roller skates and aeroplanes, rocket guns and choo-choo trains, they'd be mine all mine. Cowboy suits and baseball gloves, things and all us kitties love. Soldier toys and love. Ooh, if I was Santa Sun, I would tell to everyone that they had better treat me good because when my daddy's 93, he would leave his job to me, and then I would be Santa Claus.
SPEAKER_08How'd you like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island? How'd you like to spend the holiday away on Christmas E? How'd you like to spend Christmas on Christmas Island? How'd you like to hang your stock and on the big big coconut tree? How would you like to stay up? Wake me seven to send me a present. You would ever stay forever, Christmas, Christmas. How would you like to stay up?
SPEAKER_19If you ever spend Christmas on Christmas, you would ever spend for every day your Christmas things come true. So true.
SPEAKER_08The bloody Red Baron was flying once more. The Allied command ignored all of its men and called on Snoopy to do it again. Was the night before Christmas, for it below, when Snoopy went up in search of his foe. Despite the Red Baron, fiercely they bought with ice on his wings. Christmas bells, those Christmas bells, rang up from the last. He reached for the trigger to pull it up tight. Why he didn't shoot, well, we'll never know. Or wasn't the bells from the village below? Christmas bells, those Christmas bells ringing through the land, bringing peace to all the world, and good will of the land. The Baron made Snoopy fly to the Rhine and forced him to land behind the enemy lines. Snoopy was certain that this was the end when the Baron cried out, Merry Christmas, my friend! The Baron then offered a holiday toast, and Snoopy, our hero, saluted his host, and then with a roar, they were both on their way. Each knowing they'd meet on some other day. The second thing at Christmas that's such a thing to me. The third thing at Christmas that's such a thing to me. Hangovers, rigging up the lights. And finding a Christmas tree. The fourth thing at Christmas, that's such a thing to me. Sending Christmas cards, hangovers, rigging up the lights. And by day a Christmas tree. The fifth thing at Christmas, that's such a thing to me. Five months of bills.
SPEAKER_07Sending Christmas cards, hangovers, rigging up the lights.
SPEAKER_08And by taking a Christmas tree. The sixth thing at Christmas, that's such a thing to me. Fanxing my in-laws. Five months of bills.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I hate those Christmas cards.
SPEAKER_08Hangovers, rigging up these lights. And by Day the Christmas tree. The seventh thing at Christmas, that's such a pain to me. Still meet your army. Fanxing my in-laws.
SPEAKER_11Five months of bills.
SPEAKER_08Oh jeez. I'm trying to rig up these lights. And by Day the Christmas tree. Eight thing at Christmas, that's such a pain to me.
SPEAKER_20I tried for my charity.
SPEAKER_08Five months of bills. Ah, making up these cards. I'll eat it, give me a via, huh? Well, we have no extension cards! Time for the Christmas tree.
SPEAKER_04Finding parking spaces!
SPEAKER_08Don't eat facing feeling! Five months of birth! Writing off of Christmas cards. Hangovers! Now why the hell are they blanking? I'm finding a Christmas tree! Attending a Christmas, that's such a thing to me! Batteries not included! No parking spaces! Get a job, you buff! Your whole standing Christmas card! Oh jeez, look at this! One light goes out, they all go out! The eleven thing at Christmas that's such a thing to me! Still David Special!
SPEAKER_20No parking space! Oh my god, no never! Charities! She's a witch I hate her! Five months of hair!
SPEAKER_11Oh! I don't even know half-face people!
SPEAKER_08Oh, who's got the chair of the paper? Got a flashlight of blue flute! The twelfth thing at Christmas, that's such a thing to me! Singing Christmas carols! Batteries not included!
SPEAKER_20No parking! Jerry! Gonna make them dinner!
SPEAKER_08I'm not cleaning a misty, that's it! Shut up you! Fine! You're so smart! You'll bring up the lights! And I make a Christmas tree!
SPEAKER_12Thank you very much for listening to Acoustic Avenue. Until next time, this is Ted Crouch signing off. And on behalf of Joe Little, from our hearts to yours, stay safe and love the one you're with. Peace.