The Oh Crap Potty Training Method: Parenting book Cliff Notes

Does the ultimate "potty bible" actually work? 💩

In this episode of Moms of the Millennium, hosts Rosie and Sarah tackle the infamous, ultra-popular Oh Crap! Potty Training method by Jamie Glowacki. Rosie breaks down the book's method step-by-step.

Is the "naked weekend" actually a foolproof strategy, or just a recipe for carpet disaster? The girls share their own hilarious, messy, and painfully relatable firsthand experiences with potty training their toddlers.

While the moms agree the book offers some genuinely solid advice to get your kid out of diapers, they don't hold back on the aspects that drove them crazy. For example, the slightly condescending tone and a seriously outdated, eye-roll-inducing chapter dedicated to dads. Rosie and Sarah separate the gold from the garbage.

🎧 What We Cover in This Episode:

• The Oh Crap! CliffNotes: A quick, digestible breakdown of the blocks/stages.
• Real Mom Realities: What actually happened when we tried these methods at home.
• The Good, the Bad, and the Annoying: Why some of the book's advice feels a little too rigid.
• The Dad Chapter Disaster: Our honest reaction to how the book handles fathers (spoiler: it’s not great).

Whether you are currently trapped in the house with a naked toddler, planning your training weekend, or just need a good laugh with fellow millennial moms, this episode is your judgment-free guide to the potty trenches.

Keywords: Oh Crap Potty Training summary, Jamie Glowacki method review, potty training tips for toddlers, millennial mom podcast, parenting book reviews, honest potty training experience, Oh Crap potty training dad chapter.

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:00

And we talk about oh, it's going down the pipe, it's going down under the street, it's going in, and sometimes we see construction in the middle of the street and they're doing repairs, and we're like, oh, maybe that's that's the pipe that carries all the poop down to the cute.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

They're the moms, moms, moms, moms.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

Hello and welcome to Moms of the Millennium, a podcast where we talk about being a mom. I am Rosie. You can find me on the social medias. I am at Rosie the Red Graham on Instagram, Rosie the Red Talk on TikTok, and Rosie the Red Reddit on Reddit. Now, my amazing co-host, Sarah, tell us all about you and where you can be found.

SPEAKER_04 0:44

Hey everybody, this is Sarah. You can find me on TikTok at zarina.usman on TikTok, or you can find me on my website, zarinausman.com. Z-E-R-I-N-A-U-S-M-E-N dot com.

SPEAKER_01 1:00

All right. Thank you. Hopefully everyone will check out your amazing social medias. Oh, we also have our very own subreddit, r slash moms of the millennium. Uh so far we don't have much going on there, but maybe someday we will. And you guys will be before it was cool. Yeah. Come join the party. Come on down. Okay, the book for today. We're gonna do the thing where I read a parenting book, and I tell you what is the advice in the book because I know nobody has time to read a 200-page book. The book for today is called The Oh Crap Potty Training Method by Jamie Glowacki is the author. Great name, very nice Polish surname. Yeah. Um let's talk a little bit about uh Jamie Glowacki and um the book a little bit, and we can talk about our own experience with potty training and everything. Uh, because I uh this this book it's quite known in the in the discourse, um, but it's quite controversial. So that made me very excited. Okay, I have to see for myself what's what's it all about. Our author, Jamie, she is a social worker and mom-turned potty training consultant. And according to her, she has trained thousands or helped thousands of parents potty train their kids. This book came out in 2015. It was a pretty big success. Kind of her brand. If you look at pictures of her, she her brand is very like, I'm not a regular mom, I'm a cool mom. She uses like profanity and she jokes a lot and she uses all caps, so it's this very kind of casual, cool mom vibe. Uh the book does, this is one of the reasons it's controversial, is because it does come off as a little bit judgy. Uh I'll get we'll get into that as as we as we go along.

SPEAKER_04 2:57

Can I just say the the cool people that I know that become moms, us included, like there's I don't know how you can brand yourself as a cool mom because like inevitably you will become a haggard mom. Yeah, um unless you've got like staff.

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Yeah, well, maybe she's got staff now because she's rich after publishing this book.

SPEAKER_04 3:19

So like all the cool moms just end up, you know, you haven't showered and they're like, oh, you know, like how cool can you really be in the in the trenches? So anyway, that's my disclaimer about anyone who's uh saying they're a cool mom.

SPEAKER_01 3:33

I mean, if she had to have had time to write a book, then she already had money or something. I I I don't know. I don't really know that much about her. Uh I did look up what year she was born. She gave very strong Gen X vibes in the book, but actually she has a young boomer. She was born in like, I forget 68 or 69.

SPEAKER_04 3:53

Okay.

unknown 3:53

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 3:54

I think I think some people could could find it annoying, some people could find it judgmental, but some people might appreciate that it's just very direct and very forward. Um it's kind of the complete opposite of um Iris Chen from Untiring, who I got the impression that she was not very confident, you know. She used constantly references and quotes from other people, uh, whereas Jamie is, I'm right, I know everything, and yeah. Um getting getting into the actual advice in the book, there are kind of three sections. The first one is preparing for potty training. Is your child ready? What age should you do potty training? What kind of potty should you get? What kind of clothes? You know, this type of stuff. The second part is the actual steps, the method. And the third part is potential problems. She does suggest that you just try the method first before reading the problems section. But for you, our listeners, I read the problems section. So um, but she does say that, you know, maybe you won't have any of these problems, so don't read it ahead of time and stress yourself out over problems that you might not even have.

SPEAKER_04 5:08

I'm so curious because like I went through I went through the poly training thing and I didn't read anything. I did read like a couple of articles here and there in the trenches of it. Um, but uh yeah, so I'm curious what kind of problems could have happened that I luckily didn't encounter or what I might have done wrong. I I'm so curious. Let's let's get into it.

SPEAKER_01 5:30

Strangely enough, this is like the one topic that I also didn't really research. I think by the time we were starting potty training, I was just kind of over it with all researching stuff, you know, because I started out super motivated reading all the books, and then by the time he was two, two and a half, I was like, eh. I'll figure it out. Yeah, so the book says, and uh, and also, yeah, speaking in terms of like the problems and stuff, uh, I don't consider myself to be a very anxious person, but this book made me a little bit anxious. And and in fact, for the listeners, if you kind of struggle with anxiety or overthinking things, just skip this book. You well, you can listen, you can listen to the podcast instead, and then just stop before we get to the problems part because I do think some of the advice was helpful, but I do think it was a little bit anxiety-inducing. Oh my god, if I do it wrong, my kid is gonna be ruined for years. Okay, so diving in, before you start, is your kid ready? Do you remember like around what age you started potty training, or how did you decide it was time, or you just kind of were just like, eh, you know?

SPEAKER_04 6:39

Look, as soon as he was, um, my son was starting to walk, I was like, okay, let's get a a little potty and try something. So that was like 16 months in, but he didn't actually do an like he was potty trained by three and a half, four. The height of it was three two and a half to three to four. And um, from what I've heard, boys take a little bit longer actually than girls, but I don't know what the stats are on that. But this is anecdotally what I've heard. So that's the range I tried as soon as he was like able to walk here. Let's sit down and put tea in this thing, and nope. Didn't quite work for a a while until he wasn't interested or yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:23

I kinda I kind of did the same thing. I actually I tried to do have you heard of elimination communication?

SPEAKER_04 7:29

No, what's that?

SPEAKER_01 7:30

That's a thing where you kind of start quote unquote potty training from a very young age, like when they're a baby, and you just start putting them on the potty from like a very young age, and you try to recognize the signs that they're gonna peer poop. But I kind of just I kind of just stopped doing it. And then yeah, I tried potty training around two and a half, but it like obviously wasn't working, so he waited a couple months, and uh he was for sure potty trained by three. I don't remember exactly when. Jamie says the ideal time to potty train is between 20 and 30 months. 30 to 36 months is the danger zone. After 36 months, after they turn three, is gonna be really difficult. You're gonna have a really hard time. But obviously that's not always the case. I mean, I also wonder if she's kind of biased because she only sees people who are having problems. So because she's like a potty training consultant.

SPEAKER_04 8:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:29

Also, she does say the thing about boys being harder to potty train is a myth.

SPEAKER_02 8:34

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 8:35

Yeah, yeah. I'm overall not super pleased about her take on gender roles. We will get to that a little bit later. But yeah, she does say when it comes to kids that there is no difference in potty training boys and girls. It should be same method, same everything. Okay. Age 20 to 30 months is ideal, and she says the really sweet spot is around 24 months, so right around the second birthday. That's also partly why I thought I just was thinking about potty training now, and then I picked up this book, and that's almost exactly how old my youngest is. So I thought, oh, this is perfect. I can actually test out the method and then have the podcast and say how it worked and everything. Um 24 months is the sweet spot because your child is getting a little bit older, a little more independent, but they're still quite eager to please. They want to do what you're doing, they want to imitate you, they want to be a big boy, kind of a a good time to start. Um, some other signs of readiness are the child can communicate basic needs. They can say when they're hungry or thirsty, they can tell you something they want. If they can sing the ABCs, it seemed like a little bit arbitrary to me, but she said that means that their communication is good enough. If your child is retreating to a private place to poop, so they're wearing diapers, but when they have to poop, they go into the corner or hide under the table or something. That is a super, super huge sign that you need to potty train now because they are socially aware, you know, that pooping is something they want to do in private. And that means that they are really aware of what's going on and it's a perfect time to start potty training. So she says potty training is a social behavior. Peeing and pooping is a primal need, but peeing and pooping in a specific place is a social behavior that they have to learn. And if they're aware of these social cues, like they want privacy, then they are ready to learn this kind of social skill, which is potty training. Okay, before you start the potty training, she says clear your calendar when you're planning to your start date. Clear your calendar for a full week. No unnecessary outings for a whole week. That this kind of takes a little bit of the pressure off, you know, you're not like, oh my god, I have to go to that birthday party, what are we gonna do, or whatever. Then you have a start date in mind, you clear your schedule, and you're ready to go. It's not necessary to put the potty chair out to quote unquote get used to it. Some of the stuff in this book I think is also a little outdated because I've never heard this advice. I don't know if you've ever heard it, but apparently in the 2010s, everybody was saying you have to put the potty out so the kid can get used to it. I I've never heard that, but she says you don't have to. If you didn't do that, it's fine. Oh, she also says apparently in the 2010s, late potty training was also kind of the the standard, uh, like around age three or older. In the book, there's a lot of stuff about oh, all the all the haters and losers out there. You know, the haters and losers are gonna tell you your kid is too young at at two years and and you can't do it. I also think that's not necessarily the case anymore. I don't know, I haven't really seen much about it on social media, which is weird because I do follow mom stuff. I don't think that's the case anymore. Like, I think if you potty train it too, you could just brag to everyone about how smart your kid is or whatever. Like I think, yeah. And she says, do not post on social media that you're starting potty training because then that also makes pressure and the haters and losers are gonna come in and you know ruin your confidence or whatever. And yeah, I honestly part of me liked that her philosophy in this part and throughout the whole book is basically you just have to do it, you just have to commit and be serious about it and say, okay, I'm gonna do it and just do it.

SPEAKER_04 12:36

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:38

You have to do it, right? Like at some point, you have to potty train. You you have to do it, so just do it. Um, yeah, okay, so that's the preparation. Oh, there's also a little bit of advice about like clothes, you know, stop wearing snapping onesies and stuff like that, so that you can just pee. Yeah, exactly. Mm-hmm. And for girls, she says you can just wear a like a skirt or a dress. And at the the first phase though, is buck naked. So we'll get into that. You know, did did you do that? The the like free free peeing phase or whatever.

SPEAKER_04 13:11

Yeah, there was a uh like a committed time period where it was I I think uh we did three days on a weekend and like covered everything and I just had everything ready to clean up any accidents, uh just in case. Um, but yeah, no underwear, no diapers, just and the potty was out in the living room. Yeah, it's like immediate, immediately go to the potty. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:37

That's exactly the advice in block one, which is no underwear, no pants. I mean, she says if you're really concerned, you can have them wear a shirt, but they should be bottom half free, and you should watch your child constantly. So this is block one. She says, quote, today you will do nothing but watch your child. That part's in all caps.

unknown 14:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:04

The the idea is she references this throughout the book. You want your child to go from clueless in the clueless phase, your child is not even aware that pee is coming out of their body. They will pee while they're walking and slip on it and not know what happened, right? Because if they've been wearing disposable diapers their whole life, they they don't even have the feeling of wetness from peeing. So it's just kind of automatic, and they they might even be totally clueless that they're even peeing. So you want to go from clueless to realizing, hey, I peeed, like that came out of my body, to I am peeing, like it's I'm currently peeing, to I have to go. That's kind of the progress of potty training. So in the first day, the butt-naked day is the clueless phase. Your child is probably has no even clue that pee is even happening. And yeah, you're supposed to just watch them and when they start peeing, put them on the potty. Um, and she says you can take advantage of it to be like a nice bonding opportunity. Um, she recommends to do it during a three-day weekend, maybe, and take off an additional day if you can. Yeah, and she said the puddles, accidents, those are learning tools, right? At this stage, yeah, that is to be expected. Um, she does say at this stage you can continue using diapers for naps and bedtime, and you can explain, oh, I'm putting a diaper on because we're sleeping right now. Uh also this book relied a lot on talking, but my two-year-old, he's not he's kind of like the only caveman version of talking. I I tried kind of like explaining some of this stuff to him. Oh, I'm putting a diaper on you, and blah blah blah, and he's like, uh, you know. But I I I do think it's good to explain things to children for like purposes of just being respectful to them, you know, even if they don't understand everything. I I do think it's good to explain, but I think she overestimates a little bit how much they actually understand the yeah.

unknown 16:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:01

Okay, so that is block one, and that can take uh a couple, you know, one to three days. She doesn't always give amounts for them, but uh yeah. Block two is clothes on, but no underpants. And this one can last about a month. So she says that underpants feel too much like a diaper, and your child is gonna be too used to that diaper feeling, and also that underpants kind of contain the mess a little bit. Kind of a natural thing, like the feeling of pee or poop running down your leg is gross, you know. Even children don't like that feeling. So actually, having that feeling is good because it tells them, like, hey, this is something I don't want. I want this to happen in the potty instead. In block two, you can start doing small outings, um, like very small. Walk around the block. She also said you can kind of do little wins in this time. It reminded me of what Nikia was talking about. You can tee up a little win, like, oh, let's go walk around the block and come home, and you can say, Wow, you you hold your pee like a big boy when we were out around, you know, going for that walk. If you have a travel potty, you should bring it with you in your car wherever you go, if you if you drive a car. Um she says, This is what the hardest phase, block two. This is when most parents quit because they say, Oh, my kid's not getting it. I have to constantly remind them and everything. There's a balance between prompting and not prompting. Ah. The other thing is during block one, I forgot this part. During block one, you're supposed to get used to your kids' pee pattern because apparently there's quite a lot of variety. Some kids are like camels, they only pee three times a day, and some kids pee every hour. So once you get used to their pee patterns and their signs that they're gonna pee. They're all different signs. It's not necessarily uh downstairs, you know. They might do the typical pee-pee dance, or they might, you know, make a face, facial expression. They might get like the thousand-yard stare. Um, so learn your cut child's signals and their schedule, and that'll also help you assist with the outings. So you know, oh, okay, if he peed, I probably have another hour before he's gonna pee again. So we can do like a half-hour outing to be safe.

SPEAKER_04 18:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:20

Then once you've mastered block two, you move on to block three, which is out in the world. So you basically just start doing longer outings, and you can continue to prompt, continue to tell them, okay, it's time to use a potty. She said you can use transitional times like when they wake up before activities, things like that. And she said self-initiation, when the child tells you I need to pee, that can take another three weeks or s at least, and and not to rush it. So you always want to look for progress, not perfection. We want forward progress. So if they had three accidents today, but yesterday they had five, that's progress. There are actually six blocks in total. Uh, but I think the first three are the most important. I mean, after that, it just gets like, oh, you do outings and they tell you they need to pee, and then blah blah blah. So honestly, as I was reading the sorry, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 19:18

Oh, yeah, the hardest parts are like one, two, three, up to three. Yeah. Because once you're uh doing the outings and you're communicating, that's a little bit easier. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01 19:28

At times when I was reading the book, I would be like, wait, how many blocks are there? Like, what is what is that what are the rest of the blocks again? Because she really focuses mostly on the first three, but yeah, like you said, that's the hardest part. Yeah, I don't know. How does it how does it sound so far?

SPEAKER_04 19:44

It sounds reasonable. I mean, some of those things I don't relate to, but kids are different, and this might apply to other people. Like some of the signs that she's talking about, and I again I can see the signs that he does have and he doesn't have. Like when he was ready to potty train, he has no sense of his body. Like, even now, even though he's potty training, he still doesn't have a great sense of his body. He would not hide if he needed to go to, you know, do to poop in his diaper or anything. That's not how I figured out was time for to potty train. It was mainly just he's old enough and he can communicate and he can sit down and I can see that he needs to go. And I would say, okay, you gotta go pee. Like he would not listen to his own potty. Even now, he doesn't always like I can see he's wiggling. It's like, oh, you need to pee, you need to pee, you need to pee. And I'll tell like 10 times, and it's like you'll feel better if you just pee right now.

SPEAKER_01 20:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:40

He doesn't like, but that is tied to he doesn't um want to do transitions, and that's a bigger thing with him. Like, he doesn't like transitioning from whatever task he's doing to another task. I do appreciate her advice about taking the travel potty wherever you go. I do that as well. Um, I don't anymore, but there was a long stretch where I mean we do travel, we go on flights, we go like and we would take the travel potty. But then there was a time when he would didn't want to use that travel potty, he didn't feel comfortable pooping anywhere except inside the house. Um, he wouldn't even poop at daycare. You'd gotta poop. He only felt relaxed enough to poop when he was at home. Um so even though that travel potty came along, he didn't necessarily want to do that.

SPEAKER_01 21:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:29

And that was like a big dramatic buildup. There's a trip to France, and he didn't go for like three days, he was super constipated, and then that was like a big to do.

SPEAKER_01 21:40

And yeah, actually, there is an entire chapter on poop and poop struggles. That's um one of the common problems. Um, reluctance to poop or withholding um constipation is a very common problem. Um, and she has a lot of different solutions for it. One solution she says. Is to just give them a stool softener. You can ask your doctor for some kind of stool softener and that will just help them relax and let it out, you know? Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 22:09

Ended up doing that.

SPEAKER_01 22:10

Oh yeah, and did it work? Or okay, we don't have to go into too much detail, but it did work. Oh yeah. Speaking of poop, um, this was another thing in the preparation phase. You have to decide what words you're gonna use with your kids and be aware that they're gonna say that word in public. If you don't want your kid to say, Mom, I need to poop while you're at church or whatever, then you teach them another word. Whatever word you want to use, use that one. Just be prepared for that. Yeah, she also says, uh, as far as a transition, that potty training is a big transition, right? It's a big um it's a big skill, something that they're learning, and it can be very, you know, for kids who are really used to their routines, it can be challenging, right? So, I mean, that's why there's a whole book about it. Some of the other advice regarding poop is um that your child needs to basically relax. Some of the some of the problem has to do with, you know, stress or being afraid. She suggests bringing post-it notes with you when you go out to cover the automatic flushers. You know how when toilets have those little light-activated flushers?

SPEAKER_04 23:20

Yeah, it's so annoying. I hate those things.

SPEAKER_01 23:23

Kids get so scared. Yeah, I hate them too, and it's like there's no benefit. I know. Sometimes they flush extra like every time you open the door, and it scares the kids, and they're like, Oh, I don't want to use the potty, you know. So she's gonna bring bring post-it notes in your purse and put it over the little flusher light. Yeah, I don't know, man, the things we do. Yeah, like I said, so my my son is two, and so far, you know, knock on wood, he does not have trouble with poop. I've been putting him on the potty in the morning when he wakes up, which is usually when he poops, and he just poops and that's it. And and so far it has not been an issue. Um, so again, knock on wood. But uh, what was another advice uh regarding poop? Yeah, that you can kind of tell your child that that in order to poop, you have to relax. Like a lot of our idea about like pushing out of poop is kind of wrong. It's more like you have to relax so that you can open. And she says use words like let go, let your poop slide out, which is kind of gross, but okay. And she does say that if you're having problems, so she she said that after potty training, most kids go down to one poop a day. Even if they were pooping multiple times with diapers, that once they start using a potty, it goes down to one. If you are having many poops a day, or very few, or weird timing, or your kid seems totally unaware that they're pooping, that it could be a medical issue. That your kid, even if they are pooping, they could still be constipated. Like apparently there can be some impacted poop somewhere. And so if you're really having serious problems with it, with like weird consistency, weird timing, your kid seems unaware of what's going on, um, that you should talk to your doctor about it. And they may need an x-ray actually to see it on there, and they can give them a big medical stool soft or big medical laxative, get everything out, and that that can help things. So I did appreciate that. She said check if you're having poop issues and you might be having allergy issues, right? Like if your kid has a food allergy, they may have diarrhea or something like that. So there could be medical issues going on when it comes to poop. I mean, there might not be, but it's it's possible. Yeah. Another tip she gives is that um if your child is kind of stressed out, that while they're sitting on the potty, you can like leave the room briefly. Like say, Oh, I forgot something in the other room. Find some excuse, leave the room briefly, and maybe they just need that little bit of privacy or pressure being off. Because if you hover too much, it's also stressful, and then they're like, uh, you know, and um, and then when you come back, oh I pooped. As far as my son, how it's going, well, we're still uh we're still kind of in block two to three, I guess. Where so far it's going okay. Hopefully, hopefully it'll continue that way. Um far as uh some of the other struggles that we could be facing, what are they? Um potty training can sometimes turn into kind of like a power struggle between you and your kid, and that this is more common with older kids, three years and older. And the problem is, I I I really like this metaphor. She uses the metaphor that a power struggle is like playing tug of war. With some power struggles, you can just overpower them. You know, if you have to put them in your car in their car seat and they don't want to do it, you can just hold them down and buckle them in. Um that's one way to win tug of war. But when it comes to potty training, your child has all the power. They're the one that's peeing and pooping. So this is a power struggle that you cannot win. The the only other option is to let go of the rope. If if your child is holding all the cards, which they are when it comes to potty training, you cannot you cannot win this by like fighting with them over it. You just have to let go and just say this doesn't mean you cave in and say we're gonna wear diapers again. It means you can let go of your need to control the situation, right? And kind of sometimes there's a lot of contradicting advice because she's always saying, Oh, you need to be in charge, but you need to let go control. I don't know, stuff like that. Another common problem is bedtime, like sleeping. This was one of the blocks. I think one of the blocks is nighttime. And this is another part where it was like, maybe just because it applies to me, because she was like, oh, if you let your kid wear diapers overnight, then they're gonna be wearing diapers for the rest of their life, kind of thing. And uh, we still use diapers at night for the older one, you know. But um, this is another thing where I think that yeah, people do say it's uh for them to to wet the bed until age six, seven. Yeah, I don't know. We'll see.

SPEAKER_04 28:18

How how are the um diapers coming out in the morning? Like, do you see pee in the morning?

SPEAKER_01 28:23

Sometimes, yeah. So sometimes we try to say, like, oh, let's see if we can do a week with we we've been trying different stuff. Actually, the city, municipality, they send out little mailings when you have a kid. They send out a little mailing every year with oh, things with your kid this year. And one of the advice was bed wedding. The tips from the municipality was to have your kid use the bathroom like every half hour before bed to make sure that they're really emptied out. Jamie's advice is also to watch their fluid intake before bed, which seems obvious, but a lot of kids um are used to drinking a bottle at night or you know, drinking a lot at night. Yeah, one of her little tips is uh to use a little mini cup, a little kid-sized cup, like a really small, like a doll tea set cup, and that way they feel like they're drinking a lot, but it's it's a very small amount in there. She also advises this is Jamie's advice. She says that you should wake your kid up at night to pee. No, no, that's exactly what I said. That's a no from me, dog. I will not be doing that.

SPEAKER_04 29:39

It disturbs your sleep, and then if they wake up and then they can't go back to bed. That's another bedtime routine. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01 29:46

Well, so okay, she does say you shouldn't wake them all the way up. Keep the potty next to their bed and just wake them up so they're like drowsy, barely awake. Sit them on the potty, like hold them as they're like slumped over like a rag doll. So my son is two, you know. He started sleeping through the night. I love it. I love sleeping through the night. I am not about to be getting up at two in the morning so he can be no. I was like, no, no way. That's a hard no. No way. Yeah, this was I have to say, this is one of the things I thought this is the worst advice in the book. I mean, maybe some people can do it, but not me. Not doing that. No way. And also, though, the letter from the municipality said not to do that, so not to wake them up in the middle of the night. So I don't know, there's always contradicting advice out there. Yeah, but she does say that uh I I thought this advice was kind of helpful that you should think of it as a pyramid. When they wake up, you give them a lot of liquids to drink, and then as it gets closer and closer to sleeping time, nap time, and bedtime, then you reduce the amount of liquids that you're giving them. Um, which I guess could work, you know. That that was the only thing I read in the book where I was just like, Nope, not doing that.

SPEAKER_04 31:09

Yeah, no. Sleep is so precious, it's gold. Like, yes, hoarding that.

SPEAKER_01 31:15

She even has the advice what to do if you're pregnant and if the baby's gonna be born soon. Should you potty train now? Should you wait? And then she says, Oh, you can wait until your baby is six weeks old to do the nighttime potty training. I cannot imagine having a six-week-old baby and being like, Oh, let me get up an additional time because I'm not getting up enough. Let me get up again so that my toddler can be. I was like, No way, six weeks, man. My kid was waking up every two hours at that age. I was like, no way, man. She just forgot what it was like to have a newborn, I think.

SPEAKER_02 31:48

And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:51

Okay, uh, another potential problem is daycare. There's a whole section on daycare.

SPEAKER_04 31:58

Um, do you remember what was your daycare's policy, or was it difficult for you guys to deal with, or um, no, they were actually really good with the potty training and kind of pushed me to do better with the potty training.

SPEAKER_03 32:11

Oh, good. Because it's great, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:13

Because it was like their whole cohort was like, okay, this is the time period when you guys should be potty training, so everybody's gotta get on it. Uh I don't know. They were stricter than the advice of this book, and to the benefit, to my benefit, I guess. There were periods where I didn't trust him to go long periods uh on a bus, for example, without a diaper. There's nowhere to go. And if he soils himself, then it's gonna be a big problem for not just us, but for other people. Sure, sure, yeah. Not dealing with that. I I made the mistake of bringing him to school after one of those trips, like midday. Um, we like to go on outings, and then uh they saw that he was wearing a diaper. They're like, no, no, no, don't bring him in here with a diaper. I was like, okay. They're like, don't even put him to bed with a diaper. Please don't do that, because they're not napping with any diapers on either here. Okay. I think it would have been much, much harder without their help, honestly. And uh right now he does and and I know this is rare, and it's not all the kids all will be doing this, um, but he can go through the night without peeing. Um, I do have like a mat, a bed mat, always. Yeah, just in case. But there is the rare occasion where he does pee in the bed, um, but it's maybe once every six months or four months or something like that. He doesn't need to go to bed with a diaper on, and I and I credit that to the school sleeping. Yeah, um, doing nap times without diapers. So yeah. So I know okay, so you go on with the daycare antagonism that I'm probably gonna hear.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

Yeah, that's all great. Um so according to Jamie, this attitude is not very common in US daycares. I again, I don't know if this is still the case, but in the 2010s when she wrote this book, she said um a lot of people from you know, because she's a potty training consultant, a lot of people would tell her their daycare has the policy that the child has to wear diapers until they're able to be dry for a week, peeing in the diaper for a for a week, or something like that. And she's very against this. She says, Oh, if your kid is wearing diapers, then they're not gonna learn to potty train because they're wearing diapers.

SPEAKER_04 34:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:26

Which I do kind of agree with that, but I think she was a little bit Yeah, I mean, obviously she thinks she's she knows everything, and everyone who has a different idea is is a big old idiot. But in the daycare section, she was very condescending towards the daycare workers who are just doing their job. Usually the the your kid's teacher did not make this rule. Usually this is handed down from above, and they're just trying to follow the laws or rules, policies of the place where they work. She has a bunch of advice of like how to condescendingly, you know, passive aggressively talk to them. Well, if you think he's gonna learn to use the potty while he's still using a diaper, you know, stuff like that, I'm like, you know what? Just this person is making freaking $9 an hour to watch 12 two-year-olds, you know, like they probably just don't have time for it. And she also talks about, oh, they'll they'll argue that they don't have time for this and that. And I'm well, yeah, they don't. I mean, have you taken care of 10 toddlers before? And would you have time to take each one of them to the bathroom every hour? I mean, I kind of think she was not very understanding about that. I don't know, I guess I think that's just typical like boomer, not caring about service workers attitude.

SPEAKER_04 35:41

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 35:42

Um yeah, but she does say if that's your daycare's policy and you can't do anything about it, then that's just how it is. Just explain to your kid that diapers are only for daycare. We don't wear diapers at home, we only wear diapers at daycare. It's gonna make it harder. If your child is in daycare, you know, nine hours a day, it is gonna make it more difficult for them to potty train. But she just says, Well, if that's how it is, that's how it is. Okay, what else? Uh ah, regression. So she said if you have oh, sorry, go ahead. If you have to do it.

SPEAKER_04 36:16

Oh, can I pop in and just say um with daycare and everything? Uh potty training and so much apparenting, it takes so much patience and attunement and time. That's not uh we lose sight of how much time this stuff takes. Just knowing your kid and paying attention to all these signs and like helping them as an individual get through their own hang up uh for each instance of going to the potty. And that doesn't get enough credit. Right, right. You know, the parents doing this don't get enough credit for how much focused attention that takes. And if you're working a full-time job too, you have to schedule your potty training. Like, yes, okay, is that gonna happen during this vacation or like this holiday, or do I need to take time off?

SPEAKER_01 36:59

A holiday where you can't do anything, you can't go to the beach, you can't go on a drive, you know, you have to clear your schedule for the whole week, so waste an entire vacation. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 37:10

And and that's work. This is like literal work, just to make that visible because a lot of this stuff become becomes invisible just by just saying words like potty training. Like, what does that even mean? Like so much work. That's why like daycares can't necessarily do that.

SPEAKER_01 37:25

Because, you know, yeah, and man, in the US, I mean it depends on the state. Who knows? Like in in South Carolina, they're probably allowed to have one teacher for like 15 kids, you know. It's just not possible to pay that much attention to all of them. You know, here in Germany, my kid's class, my two-year-old, he has two teachers for like 10 kids. So that's quite manageable, you know. One of them can go take someone to the potty while the other one keeps an eye on the others. Yeah, but I think a lot of this is just survival, you know. They're just trying to they're just trying to get these kids through the day. It's it's so much work that you can't necessarily do if you have that many kids under your care.

SPEAKER_04 38:05

Yeah. So anyway, continue.

SPEAKER_01 38:07

Yeah, okay, yeah. Um, the next uh potential problem is regression. That if you have a big life change, like the birth of a sibling or a move or a new school or any any big thing that can cause a potty training regression. And she basically says it's not a big deal. If you're seven months pregnant and your kid is exactly 24 months old, you shouldn't say, oh well, I'm gonna wait to start potty training. Because even if you potty train your child before the baby and they regress, then at least you're starting from a point they have some experience rather than trying to start from zero. If you wait till your baby's old enough, you're probably gonna be like four months, you know. So you're you're losing kind of precious times. Uh she says if your child is in the right age, even if you're anticipating a big life event that may cause a regression, that you shouldn't worry about it. Just do it. And if they regress, it's okay, it's normal, it's just part of the process, and you're gonna move past it, and it'll be easier than if you didn't start in the first place. Oh, I I actually quite liked this quote. She said, It saddens me when I hear people say, Oh, she's just doing that for attention. Well, then pay attention. Doing something for attention isn't bad. It means your kid maybe needs more time from you. Maybe you don't have as much time as you used to, you know, if there's a sibling or something going on. Regression is usually just a sign of um some something difficult that's going on with the child. And and she does another thing I kind of appreciated is that she does say, ask your child what's going on. If they're old enough to talk to you about it, then then ask them about it. Maybe there's some fear, or maybe they say, Oh, there's a shark in the potty or whatever. Maybe you can figure figure something out together. There was also the story from do you remember from How to Talk, where the woman uh had the little Statue of Liberty figurine, and her kids said, Oh, this the the little green man will tell me to go pee-pee. So, you know, involve your child a little bit. Maybe your child will have ideas of something that they would that they would like. Another one is she talks about at the very end, I kind of appreciated this, about pediatricians, and she makes a differentiation between medical advice and parenting advice, which I did appreciate that because I think potty training is like some things breastfeeding or sleeping or whatever, where people ask pediatricians for advice, but these are really more like parenting questions. There can be medical issues involved. Maybe your kid does have an allergy, or maybe they're constipated, so it could be a medical issue, but otherwise, if it's not a medical issue, then it's a parenting choice, and your child's doctor is not their parent, they're not the one that's gonna tell you how to potty train, when to potty train, this kind of thing. So just accept you probably just have to decide for yourself. Yeah, so that kind of sums it up. I mean, I tried to do the really short version because I had so many quotes and everything from the book. There is way more about like potential problems. She has a whole section for older kids, if your kid is older than 36 months, something about resistance. What if your kid stares you in the eye as they're pooping on the floor? She actually says that's quite serious, that that's like a behavior issue and you need to talk to like a professional. Um, there are times when she says, Yeah, if XYZ happens, you need to talk to a professional, like therapist, family therapist or something because something else is going on. Yeah, that kind of sums up for the most part the uh the advice in the book. Overall, I think the book was pretty useful. I think the advice was, you know, it's if if you don't have any idea what to do with potty training, you're like, oh my god, what am I gonna do? I do think it would be a good book to check out. The judgmental tone, I think people overstate that a little bit because she does say, like, oh yeah, if you wait till 36 months, you effed up, you made the biggest mistake. But then she also just says, Well, you just have to deal with it now. I I think she always kind of accepts that if that's how it is, that's how it is. Okay, you've you screwed up, now you just have to deal with it, right? Um yeah, so I don't know. I can uh if you're ready, we can move on to the the spilled milk. What's uh what's the deal with this book here? Overall, people on the internet, I looked, I checked on Reddit, and you know, I I hate to be this person. I looked up on Reddit what did people have to say about this book? And some of these people, you know, far be it from me to to say that a Reddit person was not doing something right, but some some of these posts, I was like, this person isn't actually doing the method. Oh, yeah, someone says the boot camp for potty training does not work for all kids. After day one, I backed off and followed his lead, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, well, the book doesn't say to do a boot camp, right? It doesn't say you will be done after three days. In fact, it specifically says you will not be done in three days.

SPEAKER_04 43:24

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:25

I think some people who were critical of the book are actually not following the method. So I hate to be all no true Scotsman, but you know, the book actually doesn't say to do that. Someone says she is far too rigid and some of her rules are silly. She says not to get a fun potty with bells and whistles because potty is not playtime. Well, any child expert knows that children learn learn through play. Why should potty trading be any different? My son absolutely lost his sh when he saw his mini toilet that looked like mommy and daddy's and played music.

SPEAKER_04 44:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:04

Throughout the book, she does say your child is unique, individual. You know your child the best. Follow your intuition. She does say that, but she's also like, but I'm right and you should do it my way. Um, another comment: I'm in the Facebook group, and so many people stayed in the naked phase for too long because they think their kid needs to practically master it in block one. Well, she doesn't say that in block one. She doesn't say your kid has to be potty trained while they're still naked. So I think sometimes people, I don't know, maybe take the advice the wrong way. It's like people who post under recipes and say, Oh, I replaced the sugar with I don't know, what would be something funny to replace sugar with Agave. That's like an equivalent. That'd be like, I replaced the sugar with kale chips and the recipe wasn't good, you know? Well, it's like you, well, yeah, you didn't make the recipe. I mean, I can understand you saying like I did it exactly like the book and it didn't work, but if you're saying I did something different, then how can I judge if the book worked or not? Okay, so that's that's kind of one takes. And like I said in the beginning, I do think if you are an anxious person, do not read this book because it will just make you more anxious. There's constant there's so many things, like so many things to remember. It's being fire hosed with information and potential problems and things you need to remember and say this, don't say that, do this, don't do that. It was just it was just a lot. Let's see. Yeah, it it feels like uh she's kind of lecturing you. I don't know, I didn't get that vibe as much. I don't know, maybe because I'm also kind of a know-it-all a little bit. So maybe maybe the know-it-all vibe kind of worked for me. Uh okay. Uh um. This is one of my biggest um biggest problems with the book. Uh there's a little section for dads. I mean, throughout the book, she kind of assumes that you're a mom. The person reading this book is a mom, which honestly, yeah, fair enough. I hate to say it, but that's that's probably true, right? Um, but she does have a little page, oh, for dads, you know, dads, read this page, and it is bad. Oh no. It's bad. Everything you can imagine of, you know, I mean, she is a boomer. It's like boomer dad stuff. Oh well, your wife is gonna be so stressed out from doing all the work. You have to be nice to her and all this stuff. Oh, just because you tell your kid to go potty doesn't mean he's gonna do it. And I'm like, do you think these dads are idiots who don't know anything about children? In her generation, maybe that was the case. I hate to say it, but yeah, I really think a modern, I think a millennial dad would be disgusted by it. It was very condescending, and yeah, it was bad. Just just don't read that page. Don't read that page. If you are a dad, well, first off, thank you for listening to this podcast. Um, but second off, do not read that page in the book. She also says that, oh yeah, well, you know, in 95% of households, the mom is doing the potty training and the dad is the breadwinner and blah blah blah. I don't know. In 2015, could you live off one income? Like, could you raise kids? Was that the case? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 47:15

I mean, so this book is from 2015?

SPEAKER_01 47:18

It's from 2015, but she had already been doing this potty training for like 10 years at that point. Yeah, but the book's from 2015. So I'm like, I don't know if that was even true. I don't know. Have things changed that much in 10 years? Could you were were there people single-income families in 2015? Was that still a thing? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 47:36

I don't know. Is this person in New York? I feel like the audience might be moms who have uh who are stay-at-home moms but wealthier.

SPEAKER_01 47:44

Yeah, so it's yeah, I think I think you might be right. I think you might be right because the author, she's a single mom. I don't really know what happened to her her baby's daddy, but he's not in the picture. And still she had time to write a book and stuff. So I do think I think you're onto something. I didn't really look into her background and stuff, but now that you say that, I think that describes it perfectly. I think she was like a rich single mom who also had a nanny or whatever, right? Maybe that does explain it because yeah, she I think she does kind of have kind of upper middle class vibes, maybe.

SPEAKER_04 48:18

Yeah, and um, if you're a potty training consultant, your your your clientele is I mean, who hires a potty training consultant unless you really don't want to deal with it and you have some money.

SPEAKER_01 48:33

Yeah, I I think in the 2010s it was maybe a different different landscape because I feel like today you could really easily go on social media and say, Hey, buy my PDF for a hundred dollars, and probably a lot of people would buy it. I mean, freaking have you heard of taking care of babies? That's one of the sleep training, big sleep training programs out there. She sells a PDF for $300. Wow. Yeah, yeah. And I mean, people buy it because they're desperate. I mean, there's a lot of grifters out there, but I feel like that's this more popped up because of social media. Like, I feel like in the 2010s it wasn't quite like that. You'd have to go to her website, and yeah, I I do think it was maybe more of a rich people thing back then uh to hire a potty training consultant, right? Yeah, moving on, some more of the the issues. Oh, well, she's not a scientist, she's not a doctor, blah blah blah. I mean, yeah, the the the night night potty training in particular draws criticism because there's science that suggests that this is like a hormonal issue and it usually resolves around age five or six. There's no academic references in the book. But honestly, I think some of these books have too many academic references, you know? Let's be honest, I don't know if there's really that I I don't know, maybe maybe I'm wrong, but is there really like a science that tells you the best way to potty train? Maybe there is with reference to things like the nighttime potty training, you know? Maybe there's some biological reason why they wet the bed or whatever. But yeah, I don't know. Sometimes when it comes to parenting, I'm vice, I'm like, just tell me your opinion. You don't have to tell me that, oh, you know, this study showed that using the potty made them 20% more likely to blah blah blah. I'm like, oh my god. I I don't know, but I can see how people want to think that that everything is supported by science, but I don't know if that's necessary. If if you want to read studies about like, oh yeah, it said this blah blah blah blah blah, I don't know, then I guess this isn't the book for you. Yeah, uh too long. Yeah, I do think it was uh it was a bit long. I think I guess that's kind of it. So my my overall take on the book is that it could be much shorter. It should be like half the length that it is. It could be, I think it was originally a blog, a blog, and she just kind of assembled blog posts. It had a little bit of the problem of the um Iris Chen's book of being kind of disjointed, but you said that that that you kind of liked that style of like here's all my thoughts. Um so some people that m that might appeal to some people that it was a little bit kind of spontaneous sounding. I do think the whole cool mom tone was a bit uh grating at times. It was a little bit try-hard. It was like, look, you don't have to convince me that you're cool. I don't care if you're cool, you know? Yeah, and if you're trying to convince me that you're cool, you're automatically not cool. A cool person doesn't care if people think they're cool. That's kinda it. Okay, my rating. Well, actually, first, before before my rating, do you wanna do you have any other final thoughts?

SPEAKER_04 51:57

I do. I kinda want to hear some of your personal opinions, but how about you rate the book and then can I ask you some personal opinions? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:05

Well, you know me. I have personal opinions. Um, I'm gonna give the book a three out of five because I thought it was mid. I guess the mixed reviews are not because it's a love it or hate it, but because it's mid. I thought the method was overall good, but I think you'd be better served by just looking it up. What's the method? Or listening to this podcast. Yeah, the downsides were not so bad that I think ban it from your life. It was mid. It was mid.

SPEAKER_04 52:38

Okay, that's fair. That's fair. Some useful advice, some not not stellar advice, and exactly.

SPEAKER_01 52:44

And just overall, too much advice. Give me a break.

SPEAKER_04 52:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 52:49

So yeah, what's your what's your question then?

SPEAKER_04 52:51

Or your personal experience. So you're starting potty training uh with kid two, but kid one, how did that um what were the biggest challenges for you personally? And like how did you guys get through it?

SPEAKER_01 53:06

So we also did have a bit of an issue with the daycare where his first daycare teacher was just not motivated to like to do it. But then he started spending more time in another class, and that teacher, she was Russian, she was like, I will do it. Not in like a mean way, but just a you know, kind of matter-of-fact way, just I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna watch him. She was like, I will take him to the bathroom, you know, like so. Um, yeah, so that kind of worked. And with the second, you know, I do realize how kids are really different because you know, I tried the whole elimination communication, and with the first kid, it just didn't really work. He had no interest at all in using the potty, he had he didn't even care. I mean, he would sit on there if I had made him, but it you could tell he just had no idea what he was clueless, he had no idea what was going on. Um and number two, he is kind of motivated. I think elimination communication would have worked had I done it, you know. But by the time I had the second kid, I was I was not con I was over it, but um I think doing elimination communication would have worked, just maybe once a day in the morning, putting him on the potty. But yeah, it seems to be going pretty well. Like I'm not anywhere close to done. We did have a long weekend recently. Did you guys have a holiday like two weeks ago in Portugal on a Thursday?

SPEAKER_04 54:26

I don't think so. I can't remember. What was the holiday for you guys?

SPEAKER_01 54:30

Uh yeah, some I don't I don't even know. It was Ascension Day or something. It was a Catholic thing. A man, Catholic Jesus was a busy man, let me tell you. If you're in the Catholic part of Germany, woo baby.

SPEAKER_04 54:46

But yeah, I guess Portugal, the they also have the Catholic holidays, but I don't know if you are you still working for US companies, so maybe you don't Yeah, so but like daycare wise, we did have uh but we did um go out of town, so it might have been during Yeah, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:03

Well, because this Monday is also another holiday. It's another Catholic thing. I don't know what I forgot. Yeah. Oh yeah, maybe check. Maybe check. Um so that we had a Thursday holiday, and then of course the daycare is also closed on Friday, so we had a super long weekend, and we were like, okay, let's just try it this weekend, you know. But yeah, it's i if I don't put him on the potty every hour, then I'll have an accident. He's definitely not at the point of knowing he has to go. But if I do put him on the potty every hour, then he does go. So I don't know, yeah, and I'm not really following the method from the book either, because we didn't really do the naked day, and I'm definitely not doing the night waking. Um so yeah, I I can't really review the method itself. Um, but I do think it was kind of a useful guideline, but I don't think it really told me too much that I was gonna change. I did like the advice that this is a good age to start, but like that it kind of made me more confident, okay, now's a good time to start. Like he's old enough. Um, I guess that's I guess that's my take.

SPEAKER_04 56:12

Okay, okay, that's cool. I mean, I feel like potty training kind of there's the thick of it when you're doing get on the potty, do the the business. And then there's they know how to do that, and then but it's it's a lot more psychological and emotional hangups after that point. Um at least with my son, if he has emotional, if he's sad about something, or if uh we had a rough morning or something, I'm not I know 90% chance he's gonna pee the bed at nap time, you know? Yeah, yeah. It's the emotional regulation. There's that, and then uh just uh attunement and comfort levels again, like not wanting to go potty um in an unfamiliar place, but he's better at that now. Um, but sometimes it'll come up again. It's just oh, I can't sit on this potty in a particular way that I like, so I don't want to do potty there at all. I do notice like he's more relaxed around me. Um, so when we're back from daycare, that's when he wants to go potty. And if uh he's with a babysitter for a little while, um, he might not eat, and then if I'm back, then he'll eat because he body stuff is is on when mama is around. But yeah, on hold if mama is not around. Um, so that that's the kind of thing that happens. That's the experience so far.

SPEAKER_01 57:40

Oh yeah, that reminds me of another tip in the book, which says that you should like you should be more relaxed about poop, and that includes leaving the door open or letting the kid in the bathroom while you yourself are pooping.

unknown 57:53

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 57:54

And she says, like, oh, I know you think it's weird and blah blah blah. And I was like, wait, are there people that don't do that? I know. I have not had a solo bathroom break since 2021, right? Are there really people that I mean, I guess you could, you just have to close the door and then count on the door.

SPEAKER_04 58:15

Ah Yeah, I do remember like part of potty training was like, Okay, you're gonna sit in your little potty and I'm gonna go potty and you you do that.

SPEAKER_01 58:23

That was another tip. She highly recommends using the little potty for them, perversely because they can use it more independently. Like they can climb, they don't need to climb up on it like a like the big one.

SPEAKER_04 58:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 58:33

And also, yeah, I found the same thing. If I set him up, bec well, because in the morning when I wake up, I have to really go. I don't want to be sitting there for five minutes while my kid is on the toilet thinking about if he's gonna go while I'm dying over here, you know. So I definitely uh uh for that reason I switched to little one too. We also had one of those inserts at first.

SPEAKER_04 58:55

Yeah. Um I'm still doing uh potty seat on the big potty. The little potty uh is gone now. He doesn't need that anymore.

SPEAKER_01 59:03

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 59:05

Um, and he got tall enough at a certain point where he can just he's he's a boy, he can just key right into the toilet, the big toilet. He's tall enough to do that. Um, and then it's only for doing poop that got that insert for the big potty and just sits on that and does the business. Um he's fairly independent except for getting up to the the toilet seat during actual pooping. Um yeah, and of obviously like wiping is another stage. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 59:34

No, we're still we're still helping with that.

SPEAKER_04 59:37

Yeah, yeah. It's like what what happened when I was in kindergarten? Were my teachers wiping my butt? Like, I don't remember.

SPEAKER_01 59:44

Yeah, I don't remember either, right? I mean, also with wiping, some kids can't even reach until they're like five, you know, because they have those stubby little arms. So yeah, I think it's I think until uh until at least five, you you probably need to help with that.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:03

And um, there are some hang-ups. Like we talk about uh because it's a very curious kid. Um he's like, okay, where does that poop go? Where does it go when we flush it? Where does blah blah blah? He's like, You want to look at it, you want to say, okay, here you go. Um, and we talk about go, it's going down the pipe, it's going down under the street, it's going in, and sometimes we see construction in the middle of the street and they're doing repairs. We're like, oh, maybe that's that's the pipe that carries all the poop down to the that's so cute. Aw. Um, and this place is small enough where we can, you know, we walk around to the marina where they do have the sewage treatment facility, and it's like, oh, maybe the poop is here now. The clean water is gonna go into the ocean now. Yeah, that's great. So there's some context, and uh that helps um give some animation to the poop story.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Um, she does say that that's another reason why they like the the little potty a little more, because then they can kind of see their poop, and then she said they can help dump it into the toilet. Um, and the book says, Oh, I know you won't believe it, but that'll be your kid's favorite part is dumping the poop. I was like, man, I know that's gonna be his favorite part, and it absolutely is. He's been obsessed with throwing stuff in the toilet, unfortunately. Um, so no, yeah. Well, he kind of stopped doing it, but there was a week or two there where he would throw toys in there, and we had to make sure the lid was always closed and stuff. Oh yeah, but he loves dumping his poop in the potty. Oh my goodness. She said that's also part of the kind of anxiety around pooping, is they're accustomed to pooping in a diaper. Pooping on the toilet, first of all, it's a different sensation, right? And secondly, it's a little bit scary, like, oh my poop is just disappearing into the void. Seeing it there in the little potty helps them understand what's going on a little more.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:02

Yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Oh, can I talk a couple more points about making the invisible kind of visible?

SPEAKER_01 1:02:10

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:10

When we were doing like the three-day, it wasn't a three-day, it lasted longer than that, but you know, you do the intensive whatever. I got the materials to cover the sofa and like waterproof, you know, the protectors, you know, surface protectors, and I put it all over the sofa couches and like covered it with blankets and whatever and um plastic mats and things like that. So you gotta like source all that stuff and you gotta like put it in there and then throw it in the washing machine and do all that. Uh, if you're not the parent who is like in charge of the potty training, you might not see that that's a lot of preparation and work after the fact and just cleaning up the messes. Oh, all the soiling that happens in the process.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:52

Oh my god, the laundry triples. Yeah. More than triples, quadruples. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:57

Having extra sets of clothes ready, and then you know, just hand washing some of the things that you want to keep, and then it's a lot more work. Yeah, then in the middle of the night, if they soil the bed, then you have to change the mats, if the blanket needs to be changed to get them back into a fresh situation, and that's disruptive of sleep. Um and then what else is there? Um, oh, just these moments of okay, this is a good moment. It's a little TMI too, but like just being like I remember I remember like the little potty was out in the living room and I was in the bathroom, and I was just I don't I don't know if I told him to go sit on it or he was doing something else, but I was in the bathroom doing my business. Yeah. And then I hear a cry from the an excited cry coming from the living room, mama, I did it, I did it. Come look, come look, come look in the bathroom with like a menstrual cup, and just like this is not the bad time, kid. Yeah, he wants the validation so bad, like right now. And it's uh Yeah. You wanted that moment to yourself, right? But it's not gonna be your moment to yourself. No, no, you gotta get on that moment because that is very important to reinforce potty training.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:12

So she she does give the tip, you know, if your kid either wants to show you something or has to go potty, she said if they tell you I have to go potty, you have 10 seconds, it means now. But she says if you acknowledge them, if you say I'm coming, that'll buy you like another 10 seconds. Yeah. So um, yeah. So in that kind of situation, I know it doesn't work because you need more than 10 seconds. Oh, I'm coming. What or just chat a bit? Oh, what yeah, what happened? You know, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:44

But those are the realistic like scenarios you're gonna end up with, yeah, in the middle of potty turning.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:49

So yeah, man, anything can happen. I mean, as I mean, I used to did you ever use the bathroom when your kid was in the baby carrier, like when they were a baby.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:58

Yes, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:00

I did that all the time, all the time. I'm I'm way ahead of you, Jamie. I've been doing that since birth. Yep.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:10

Um, good episode.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:14

I think so too. I think so too. Well, it was perfect timing too. Thank you so much for joining me, Sarah. I had a great time as always.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:21

Yeah, so super fun and a super interesting topic that's gonna for sure.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:27

Yeah, great. Okay, then see you next time.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:31

There, there, mumps, mums, mumms, mums, oh, the will.