Feeling Lost? God Can Still Heal Your Life Prophetic Word

Healing From Trauma With God | Finding Purpose, Identity & Peace Through Jesus

In this episode, we talk about Christian healing, overcoming trauma, spiritual warfare, identity in Christ, and learning how to trust God during wilderness seasons. If you’ve been feeling lost, broken, spiritually exhausted, anxious, or disconnected from your purpose, this conversation will remind you that God still has a plan for your life.

Shell Bell shares a powerful testimony about healing from emotional wounds, breaking fear and insecurity, embracing spiritual gifts, and allowing God to transform pain into purpose. This episode explores faith, self-worth, inner healing, deliverance from fear, and walking boldly in the calling God placed on your life.

We discuss: ✨ Healing from trauma through Jesus
 ✨ Christian self-development and spiritual growth
 ✨ Trusting God in difficult seasons
 ✨ Spiritual gifts and the Holy Spirit
 ✨ Overcoming fear, shame, and insecurity
 ✨ Spiritual warfare and protection
 ✨ Discovering your God-given purpose
 ✨ Faith, healing, abundance, and breakthrough

If you are searching for Christian encouragement, healing prayers, faith-based motivation, identity in Christ, or support through difficult seasons, this episode is for you.

📚 For books, resources & more → https://redhottruthministry.com
 🙏 Support the ministry → https://paypal.me/mocall89

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi, beautiful soul family. Welcome back to Red Hot True Ministry, a home for the broken where healing begins. I'm so happy you're here as always, and I love creating content for you guys. I really hope that you are benefiting from the prophetic healings and from our podcast. Unfortunately, I spilt water on my laptop yesterday and I am unable to record, edit, schedule the way that I normally do, which is very upsetting and distressing for me. So today I am recording on my phone and I'm doing my best to make it work. So I really would appreciate your support. Like, comment, subscribe, engage, try to get this video out to as many people as possible. And I'm really passionate about this ministry. It truly means a lot to me, and I really want to help people get free from their soul wounds and from the things that are limiting them in their lives or or sabotaging them or just causing them to be unhappy or sick. Because I know what it's like to be broken and to go through really hard things and to feel haunted by the past and haunted by the things that you've gone through and to literally be drowning in shame and unworthiness and fear and confusion and feeling so trapped in darkness and thinking that there's no way out, but then finding God and coming home to him where he really starts to nurture and love us and love us in our brokenness. And I remember so many people would try to change me or fix me or tell me that I'm overthinking it or I'm obsessing or I'm drowning in pain or they would always like project blame onto me as if this was my fault, you know, and that was one of the things that the Lord never did. He never pointed the finger at me, he never blamed me, he never shamed me, he never gaslit me, he never belittled me, he never mocked me, I never felt humiliated or condemned in his presence. I always just feel so loved and supported and cared for. And even in my brokenness, even in my sin, even when I'm really struggling to move forward or to put something down that doesn't serve me, he's so patient, so gentle, so kind, so loving. And he uproots the things in me that are maybe sabotaging or hindering my walk or blocking my destiny. Like he does it in such a gentle way that only makes me feel supported and seen. And I think this is really important that we understand that this is who Jesus is. He is loving, he is kind, he is patient, he is gentle, he is the fruit of the spirit. He is not condemning us, he is not coming down hard on us. Sometimes these videos pop up on my feed and they just fill me with fear. And I don't know if you guys feel that way, but will you just feel afraid when you see these messages from other people popping up on YouTube or TikTok or whatever, and they're like warning from God or God needs you to know this today, this is urgent. And these types of messages are frightening, particularly for somebody who's trying to heal from trauma, because it's threatening that safe place, that one place in our lives that feels safe, that feels certain, that feels secure. I think that's one of the reasons why I just love my fate and Jesus so much is because he's the only thing in my life that is certain, the only thing that never changes, the only one who never abandons me, the only one who's right here when I don't even feel worthy, and you're going to have bad days, you're going to have arguments with your spouse, you're there's gonna be times where your kids hate you. So none of those things are ever certain. I currently have a preteen that is literally driving me crazy and Nala. I currently have a preteen who is emotional and grieving and stressed out, and my life right now just feels very overwhelming because I'm in that in-between place in my life where I've walked away from the old community, my family are gone, I've been no contact for four years, I've gone through this whole healing journey, and I'm still not in my new season, that breakthrough that I've been waiting for and longing for. It hasn't seemed to come yet, and I'm still healing certain things, and I feel like the enemy is still distracting me and confusing me. And I know what it's like to feel stuck in your life and to feel like nothing makes sense, and being in that wilderness wilderness, being in that in-between, where you're still fighting for your freedom. The old life has all been stripped away, but the new hasn't come yet, and you're just like waiting on God, literally putting all your faith in him. And I saw a video yesterday where this man was talking about Noah's ark and how Noah had to trust God every step of the way, and he didn't even have a steering wheel in the boat. So he had to get into this boat or this arc that he had built with no steering wheel, and he had to just fully trust in God to protect him and his family and the animals. And it must have been so terrifying, but God literally steered the boat and and brought them to safety, brought them to dry land, and then that new season opened up in their lives, and the Lord is still working on us, he's still doing this new thing that we keep talking about, you know. I'm always like, the Lord is doing a new thing, but we're in the process of that new thing because we have to become new first. So he's stripping away the things that don't serve us, and I have been battling with quite extreme OCD for the last year or so, and I know by watching my podcast and my YouTube, you may not think that I'm struggling to that extent, but I actually have been very overwhelmed. I've been in a very hard season, and social media isn't real. You're not getting all the hard parts, you're just getting the the best version of me on social media, but the professional version of me, the ministry version of me. But underneath that, there is still fragmentation, there's still woundedness, there's still brokenness, and I'm still very much in the trenches, and the enemy still targets me and targets my mind and confuses me so much, and it's so overwhelming. But when you've been through significant trauma in your life, then this takes time to heal, and we can't really spiritually bypass it. Sometimes when a memory surfaces for me, it can take me weeks to actually process that memory and to climb into it and to process and deal with it because it's just so overwhelming. It triggers fear, it can tri trigger confusion and stress and chaos and OCD. And I can spiral for a week or two before I actually ground and start to feel able to process it. So even for somebody who's been doing this for a long time, has been healing for a long time, has been trying to overcome some very hard things, I'm still struggling. So if you've been going through a hard season and your trauma has felt all-consuming, or you're feeling isolated and alone, you're wondering, does any of your life even make sense right now? Just know that you're not alone. That many of Christ's disciples do go through this transition stage where at times nothing makes sense. The only thing that makes sense is him. And maybe we need to come to that place of just total dependency. Like the Bible says, unless you become like little children, you will never understand the kingdom of God. It says something like, I can't remember the exact verse, but something like that. And it's true. He's stripping us back to our bare bones. He's bringing us back to our innocence and our purity and that process of of detangling and deconstructing and putting down the chains and this the torrents in our mind and the programming and the conditioning that we have been literally made muddy by, like it's literally made us unclean in some ways because some of it is so distorted, especially if you've been through abuse. You have been humiliated, you've been shamed, you've had hatred projected onto you, you've been made to feel worthless, you've been stripped of your dignity. So of course, you're now covered in this mud, and it makes you feel rotten. And the Lord is trying to take all of that away so that you can see yourself through his eyes, because he made you in in his image. And when he looks at you, he actually sees, sees you like as if you're as pure as gold, you know. That's what I'm seeing in my head. This image of this gold bar that's really shiny and precious and valuable because that's what we mean to him. We are we are his children, and he loves us, we're his creation. He literally looks down on us and he admires us so much every day. And we we need to understand that we are not our past, we are not our trauma, we are not our pain, we are not the things that people have projected onto us, and we do have to peel it all away. And that that is a painful process. It takes time, it takes work, it it takes reprogramming, renewing your mind, and learning who you are in him. And it's not just about reading your Bible. I mean, reading the Bible is important, but it's also about doing inner work, therapy, social support, self-care, self-love is very important. I know that there's people within Christianity that tells you that all of that is demonic apparently. That's not true. Our self-worth matters, our confidence matters. Being able to show up and be ourselves matters. Being able to look in the mirror and say, I'm proud of me and how far I've come and who I am, because I am made in his image and he loves me, and if God is for me, then who can be against me? I can't even be against me. Recently my children have gone through this weird dynamic where they've been kind of fighting a lot, and both of them have been teased in different ways, one for being too short, one for being too big. And I've had to sit with them a lot and and tell them, you are made in Christ's image. So it doesn't matter. We are all different. We all come in different shapes and sizes. Some of us are small, some of us are tall, some of us are heavier, some of us are more petite, like, but this is how God made you. And you can't spend your life looking in the mirror hoping that you look different. You have to accept yourself for who you are. We all do because it's the one thing that we actually can't control. I can't control my facial features and how tall I am. Like there's certain elements, you know, we we can practice self-care, we can eat healthier, of course, we can use nice skin products to make our skin look good, but at the same time, there's certain parts of our being that we just have to accept. And I think it's really unfair when people weaponize these things that we actually can't control. Like teasing somebody for being short makes absolutely no sense because they have no control over that. They literally can't go and change that. And it's unfair. And I was trying to explain this to my children that this is just cruel and it's a form of bullying and it's not okay. And I think we all have to, when we look at ourselves in the mirror, we have to look at ourselves through his lens. And then this really prevents some of that negativity that people are just projecting onto everyone around them because they feel insecure. And the Lord doesn't want us to feel insecure, he doesn't want us to compare ourselves to everyone around us. And this is actually like a root for evil eye. So a curse without cause cannot land. So when you're being attacked by the evil eye, it's because there's a root there that they're able to cling on to. And we have to uproot those things in us. So we have to look within and say, okay, what am I so insecure about? Where do I feel inadequate? Where do I feel unworthy? Where do I think I don't belong or I'm not good enough? Where do I compare myself to others or my life to others? And I found myself doing that this week where I bumped into an old friend of mine, a girl that I went to primary school with. She's a lovely person. We were very close, and I have no negative feelings towards this person whatsoever. Like I love her, she is absolutely beautiful. So there's no jealousy. I'm not jealous of this person, but I found myself comparing my life to hers because she, on the surface, seemed to have this idealistic childhood where she had a very loving family, she was quite content and happy. I remember going to her house, and her house was literally like something out of a fairy tale, the way her room was all decorated. It was just so much love. Her house was full of love. And to me, I really felt it as a child who was growing up in chaos and dysfunction and abuse. I really felt that. And I used to compare myself to her then. I thought she was way prettier than me and everything. And I eventually let go of that because I started to like how I look, and I stopped comparing my looks to other people. But when she pulled in in front of me at the school recently, she was driving a brand new Jeep. And compared to my 2012 Aurus, that is honestly like sometimes breaking down and just a little bit unreliable and stressful, I found myself comparing again. And I wondered what my life would have been like if I had a normal family. If I had experienced the love that she experienced, would my life look different now? If I had been supported in what I wanted to do as a young adult who wanted to study, go to college, get my degree, if my parents had supported that patway, then maybe I would have had a better career. If I didn't go through the extreme abuse that I went through, maybe I wouldn't be battling complex PTSD. If my parents had treated me better, maybe I wouldn't have developed such an extreme autoimmune disease. Maybe I would have been able to work and have a normal life. And you know, it when you start looking back like that and you start to compare your life to somebody else's, and you just see that on every single level, from literal birth to all the way up to now, how vast and different that life is when you come from a loving family that loves you unconditionally and supports you unconditionally, even if they don't agree with you, they still support you compared to somebody growing up in neglect and abuse and dysfunction and no support, and you see the outcome. You know, the people in the latter category struggle more financially, struggle more in their relationships, struggle more in their health, struggle more in their mental health. And this is literally proven. This is like universally proven. So there is like a direct correlation between health issues and life expectancy and all of these things, financial issues, because there's such like confidence issues. There's anxiety, there's fear, there's fear of authority. So like working for a boss can feel very daunting and intimidating to somebody who grew up under an authoritarian parent. So it's not unrealistic for me to feel that way, to feel like if I had the same privileges that she had, then maybe my life would look very different right now. And when we start to compare like that, and we start to really like drown in the wound and in the pain, that can actually allow that evil eye to land on you. And you can be attacked by other people's jealousy, and it can cause this curse. So we have to really heal that. We have to heal that wound. And for me, I remember after reflecting, I sat with the Lord and I said, everything in my life led me to you. And I think that's the most important thing, and that's the thing that I have to hold on to. So even though I've struggled in every way throughout my life, it all led me to him. And it led me to discipleship and it led me into ministry and it led me to being a light in this world. And even though my life is still hard and things still don't make sense, I have to just trust him and the path that I'm on. And I can't compare my life to somebody else's. Even if their life seems easier on the surface, it's not fair for me to compare like that because we don't actually know what this person is going through. They could be going through their own trials and everybody struggles. So I think when we just step out of the pain and take a step back from the wounding, we then are able to actually see it just through a cleaner lens, you know, where we stop to stop comparing and be grateful for the journey, be grateful to where it led us, because ultimately the Lord does have a plan. And when somebody does have a lot of ease and grace and comfort in their lives, they don't learn the same lessons and they don't have the same fire and the same passion in their bones, literally. Like they don't develop the same level of strength or endurance or determination. So there's pros and cons to both where we can start to when we start to compare, we start to forget who we actually are. Because we're like, oh, if I wish my life was easier. But then would you be as resilient? Would you be as brave? Would you have gone to war with Satan? Would you have found Christ? Would you have been discipled by him? Would your life contain this magic? That these miracles that other people don't have. So we have to take off the muddy lens and stop seeing it through the eyes of trauma and start seeing it through the magic and the miracle that it actually is. And the Lord was really talking to me about magic this week. And I I was like, I'm afraid of that terminology, those words, because in the past I spent time in the occult and in the new age, and for that reason I became very afraid of everything spiritual. And I also went through some spiritual abuse, I went through some abuse in the church and some church heart. So that actually paralyzed me in some ways, and I started to forget who I am. I started to lose my identity, I started to lose my gifting, and I started to become very ordinary in my life. And my life started to feel empt empty. It started to lose its purpose and its meaning. And the joy that I had was slowly being sucked away. And then recently the Lord said to me, I need you to use your gifts. And I said to him, Lord, I'm afraid. I'm so afraid. I don't know if it's from you, if it's new age, if it's a cult, because when I went through that abusive situation in the church, the pastor had planted these seeds in my mind that maybe my work is demonic. So I was so terrified of my gifts, and I wasn't using them. And then I sat in prayer and I started to pray for Kean, my son, who he was in an asthma flare, and I could literally see the flames in his in both his lungs and his throat. And I started to pray over him, I put hands on him, I started to uproot that inflammation out of his chest and out of his airways, and then I saw these anchors in his lungs, and the Lord showed me these roots and the root cause of what he was feeling, and there was a lot of grief and stuff there. And there there was some old soul soul wounds and trauma that we had to heal. So I started to uproot that and heal and deliver. And it put his asthma flare into remission within 24 hours. And I was literally in awe and in shock. And I was upstairs cleaning the toilet and I just burst into tears because I literally after I did this healing on my song, I got such a surge of energy, and I was able to start cleaning the house. I went from like sitting in the kitchen feeling tired and drained to suddenly having a lot of energy and being able to go put away all the clothes and clean the bathrooms and stuff. And as I was cleaning in the bathroom, I was listening to worshi worship music, and I suddenly just felt this overwhelming emotion and I started to cry. And I said, Lord, I lost me over the last year. Like I literally lost me. And he said, I need you to come home, to stop running from your anointing, stop running from your calling. And I had no idea that I was running. I thought I was still showing up every single week, still posting, still recording, still praying. But there was no passion, there was no fire fire, there was no joy in it anymore because it had all been sucked out of me when I went through this abuse in the church. And when everything in my life collapsed last year, it put me into such a depression, and I've literally just been clinging to life and barely hanging on. And at times I was having like really dark thoughts and stuff as well, and it was just the hardest year of my life. Well, maybe not of my life, but it was a hard year. And I picked the worst day to record on my phone because all I can hear is my neighbors cleaning next door and the Hoover like knocking against the walls and stuff. So I'm sorry if you can hear all the background noise. But I think as I was cleaning, the Lord said to me, Embrace your magic. Embrace the magic within you. Because having the Holy Spirit within us is so magical. Lay hands on the sick, the ability to cast out demons, the ability to break chains and break crisis. It is just so magical and I'm so in awe of it. And I started to lose it. I started to let it all slip away from me because I was so scared and so afraid that that pastor was right. That what if I am demonic? What if there is something off about my gifts? What if I'm doing it the wrong way? What if this is all just a delusion in my mind to help me cope with my pain? And when you start letting other people put out your fire like that, and you start to shrink. And I saw this spirit as well of false comfort that had come through that church because this church would seem very loving and charismatic, and they would bring you in under their wing, and they would make you feel so welcome, and they would say, We're gonna disciple you and we're gonna do this and that, and you're gonna be okay. But then they would slowly program you to believe that the gift stopped years ago and that the Lord no longer heals in this way, and that we just have to do the power of prayer and counseling, and anything outside of that is charismatic or dangerous, and we have to be so careful of false prophets to the point that we never operate in revelation or prophecy or gifts, just in case we're outside of the will of God, and it's all coming from fear and control, and it it literally puts out it chokes out the life of a believer, it chokes out your fate. And I can't believe that this was what was happening to me because I've always been so passionate, I've always been so on fire, and I love Jesus more than I can ever explain. And I'm so passionate about my calling and my walk with him, but I really allowed this to happen where my light and my fire started to go out because I no longer felt safe and I no longer trusted my own abilities and my own gifts. And to me, that is terrifying as somebody who this is my identity and this is my purpose, and I don't know who I am without it. And I started to lose me and I started to have very dark thoughts, and I walked through a very dark season. And when I felt that light coming back on, and I had this big release of emotion, and I cried and cried in such gratitude that the Lord had brought me back home to me and to him fully, and he took that fear away, and then he showed me that spirit of deception and false comfort that had been following me and whispering lies and telling me that this is the wrong way to do it, and don't do it this way, and don't do it that way, and literally like covering my eyes and blinding me and confusing me and trapping me in fear because oppression does attach to us from these places and these people and these false beliefs and these lies from the enemy. And we have to be so careful that we're not believing these lies and that we're not we're not letting trauma or wounding muddy our lenses and cause us to become a smaller version of ourselves. And that was something that I swore I wouldn't let happen. I swore that I would never shrink again, but then you get smacked in the face with a whole big rejection wound again, and it does, it does knock you down. But we always have to get back up and we have to remember who our source is because I am a daughter of the king, you are a daughter or a son of the king. So we cannot let people put out the things in us that make us who we are. I'm just pausing for a minute to see if there's anything the Lord wants to add to this conversation. He's showing me the bar of gold again. He's saying, be as pure as gold in your heart, in your talk, take the talts captive. Don't allow the enemy to distort his truth and read the word so that you know what the truth is, so that when the when the voice of the enemy gets loud, you're able to reject it and renounce it and say, No, that is not the truth. This is the truth, this is who I am, this is what the Lord says, this is what the word says. So I am not going to let that voice of the accuser knock me down or make me shrink or make me small because I am going to turn up as me and as who he made me and who he called me to be, and I'm going to be all of me, not just parts, not just compartmentalized, not fragmented, not in fear, not in confusion, but me, knowing who I am in him. And this has been a heavy season of isolation for some of us. And I do think that the Lord wants to change that. He wants to bring community, he wants to bring support, but first he just had some things that he needed to heal or remove or change so that you would feel worthy of the life that he is leading you into, you know. That worthiness is very important because sometimes we attract what we believe we deserve. Am I saying that right? We attract what we believe we deserve, yes. And you have to understand that you deserve the best. You deserve it all. You deserve the life that you crave. If the Lord put it in your heart, it's because he wants you to have it. It's not because you're greedy or you expect too much or you're not humble enough or you're not sacrificial enough. Like many of us have sacrificed so much every step of the way, and wanting some peace and ease and security and comfort is not a sin. That is not a bad thing. But the enemy wants you to believe that your expectations are too much and that you're not allowed to have good things, and that's just not the truth. Because you are allowed to be in overflow, you are allowed to be in abundance, you are allowed to be in positions of wealth and power and security so that you can bless others. I mean, right now we have many corrupt systems in place where they don't care about the poor, they don't care about the broken, they don't care about the homeless or the dying, they don't care about the single mother who's chronically ill and struggling to put food on the table, living in extreme stress or crisis, whereas when the Lord blesses his people, his chosen people, they're able to go out and actually make a difference to people's lives because they truly care. They have the Holy Spirit living inside of them, so they actually care about the lost and the broken. And it's important that you recognize that, that I am worthy of the life that I want, where I'm able to live in such overflow and abundance that I am able to pour into the lives of others, especially those who are broken and lost. And if anybody told you that those types of expectations are too much or rooted in greed, then I want you to peel all that noise away and just throw it to the ground and say, get behind me, Satan. Because that is not what greed is. Greed is when people get ahead off other people's backs, stomp on people to get there, and then they accumulate all their wealth without ever giving back a thing. Or when they do give back a thing, it's just for like image control and media management. It's not because they actually care. Whereas when you're being led by the spirit and you're walking in the spirit and you are obedient to God and you pass a homeless person on the street and the Lord says, give that person a tenor, even if it's your last tenor, you're gonna give it to them. Whether you have 10 million in the bank or 10 euro in the bank, you're gonna obey the Lord and you're gonna give that person that 10 euro because that's who we are as disciples of Christ. We listen to him, we obey him. And for that reason, there is no shame or no crime in being blessed so that you can bless others. And we have to come out of agreement with poverty consciousness, we have to come out of agreement with fear of wealth, fear of money, fear of doing something wrong, because it's really hard to make a difference in this world without resources. And the Lord is saying open your heart, open your heart to the blessings and what he's trying to do in your life. Do not shrink in fear. There may be somebody here today who you're turning your back on your blessings and your opportunities and what the Lord is trying to do in your life because you feel very much chained to your past. But the Lord is breaking those chains and he is pulling you out of self-protection, and he is pulling you out of fear and confusion, and he is turning it around, he is turning you around because you deserve good things and you deserve a good life, and the Lord is breaking your chains. So just unzip from that self-protection. Stop trying so hard to protect yourself. You are safe. He walks right beside you, he walks before you, he has angels around you. The people who once hurt you are gone. He has made all things new. So take the step forward. Take off the mucky lens, remove the self-protection and break the chains and say, I'm ready, Lord. I am ready in Jesus' name. Amen. So that's it for today. Guys, pray for me that my laptop will work. It's currently turned off and drying out. I'm praying it will turn on. If you would like to sow a seed into this ministry, I am grateful for your support and your help because I may need new equipment soon for the ministry so that I can continue to show up and I'm just praying that it will work. But for now, I will upload on my phone if I need to. And I thank you all for your support as always and for being here. Don't forget to subscribe and check out what we offer in the description below. I'll leave the link to my landing page. And I love you lots. I will see you in the next one. Take care. Goodbye.