The Connection Between Fitness and Faith Most Men Miss

Most Christian men don’t realize how deeply their physical life is shaping their spiritual life — or how much their lack of self‑worth is draining everything else. In this conversation, Men’s Strength Coach Sean McManus breaks down the connection between fitness, faith, identity, and personal growth that most men completely overlook.

We talk about why so many husbands and fathers feel empty, why men struggle to love themselves, and how discipline, brotherhood, and spiritual formation rebuild a man’s confidence from the inside out. This isn’t a fitness episode — it’s a call to reclaim your strength, your purpose, and the man God designed you to be.

If you’ve been running on empty, doubting your worth, or feeling stuck in your own life… this might be the missing piece.

The connection between fitness and faith most men miss

Why Christian men feel empty and exhausted

Rebuilding self‑worth and self‑love as a man of God

How discipline fuels personal growth and confidence

Why you can’t lead your family if you don’t lead yourself

The danger of isolation and the power of brotherhood

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

see a lot of guys today mark they don't like themselves they don't love themselves and they're trying to give and give and give and give and give and give and they don't have anything to give they're not they're not giving from a place of abundance like they're yeah there's yeah exactly they're they're continuing to try to pour from an empty cup and nothing's coming out and they're wondering why their life feels empty and you know why their marriage isn't where they want it to be or why their relationship with their kids isn't where they want it to be like they desire those things but they're just constantly giving giving giving giving giving and they're not getting anything back and you you can't give from an empty cup. It's impossible you can't do it.

SPEAKER_02 0:39

Welcome to the Valiant Force Podcast where we help men overcome life doubt go up better in the world and become a value force for God's journey to help us become the thing of God's purpose are you ready to overcome the doubt and fulfill your purpose just by getting it so let's go if your body is weak then your leadership will be weak.

SPEAKER_04 1:10

Today's guest believes fitness is spiritual formation and he's here to challenge how you see yourself. John McManus is a strength coach and the founder of McManus Strength and Nutrition. Sean helps men rebuild their confidence. He teaches them discipline and leadership where most guys ignore it their physical fitness. After walking away from comfort and chasing a deeper calling he now equips husbands and fathers to lead from the front I'm sure you're gonna enjoy this conversation today. Sean and I have a lot in common because you know I have this fitness journey myself and we talk a lot about how men can step up so here's my conversation with Sean McManus.

SPEAKER_00 1:53

Sean welcome to the podcast Mark thank you man it's great to be here I'm looking forward to our conversation together yeah me too I I think I've had a couple of other fitness guys on but I don't know if just from diving into your story I I resonate with a lot of what you what you do awesome I love that it's uh probably probably none with a mustache this good uh at least I hope not anyway I don't think it yeah I think you're the only one with the mustache with just the mustache yeah I'll take it I'll take it it's because I can't grow a beard that's that's the only reason I grew a mustache it's okay we won't talk about that yeah yeah the mustache is good it's it's they're they're coming back in style so they are they are slowly but surely one by one yeah so how did you get into fitness man so uh my journey in particular so I was a very very very skinny kid um I hit a growth spurt when I was probably 12 or 13 and I grew to I'm six foot and like height wise I haven't grown any since then um but you can imagine being 12 years old and and and being six foot tall um you know it's kind of like noodle arms and noodle legs and that's it right uh you know zero zero muscle mass whatsoever um and I was I was always pretty athletic but I I always felt like the just the small skinny kid and so started lifting weights in high school and lifted on into college had no idea what I was doing was just kind of flying by the seat of my pants and um went through college got got out of college you know continued to lift and then I took I took a little while off once I got out of college and started my corporate job and you know I was I was living by myself at the time I was engaged but my wife was still in school and so you know I I would get up I would go to my job I would come back to my apartment and I would you know drink beer and watch TV and I was like this is this is a pretty great this is pretty good great life and one time I you know I woke up and um my fiance and now my wife was was visiting and she kind of poked at me a little bit and she said you're getting kind of fluffy and I was like that's weird I've never had any body fat on me ever. So at that point it was like okay so I I started you know we got back into fitness and at that point I really dove in deep and started you know diving into the nutrition aspect of it and diving into really building muscle mass and and hooked up with a coach and um yeah that's that's kind of the the origin story of of getting into fitness and then I've maintained a level of fitness you know through various stages of life uh when my wife and I first got married you know when we first had um a son and into you know entrepreneurship into a second baby into you know some other business ventures um it's always looked a little bit different but I've always maintained some level of fitness so that's how I got into it.

SPEAKER_04 4:48

Awesome. So how did the how did that flow with your faith journey?

SPEAKER_00 4:53

Good question. So when I first got into it and I we're kind of hitting on this a little bit off camera but when I first got into it really seriously that period of like after college when I was working um it kind of took over my life to an extent excuse me not to say that I ever you know walked away from my faith or or you know really put it I I wouldn't even say that I put it ahead of my faith but I was not um it was it was it was a it was obsessive and in a way that was probably not healthy. I mean I I I literally put it before everything else um and then you know as I as I grew and as I matured and life changed um you know we started having kids we've got we've got two little boys now it became more about I need to be physically capable of protecting them and I need to be physically capable of providing for them and I need to set the standard for what they are looking to in their own lives. And I should set the standard to you know the men that are the the man that they that they're going to be when they grow up that is now my responsibility. So that's kind of how it shifted in terms of like how I viewed it and then you know starting to look at it from a point of like God gave me this body and it is it is I I desire to give it back to him knowing that I took good care of it because you know everything that we have is from him and it's it's on loan. Eventually he's going to get it back. And so when he gets it back I want to hand it over to him and say you know here you go father I took good care of this um so it's about that and then it's about you know really being physically capable of of doing whatever he's called me to do.

SPEAKER_04 6:36

So there's there's several different pieces there but there's that's a couple of them yeah so I like what you're saying like God gave me this body to take care of it because you're talking about stewardship which I want to get into that because a lot of men fail on stewardship. But before we go there because you know we talked a little bit off air I I've been into fitness for a little bit and when I most of the people that I know who got into fitness a lot of people have this kind of their fat to fit journey which I have one of those it's all in and that that's what I was when I did it. I was all in I had the and it was it was fake I'm just being honest about it. Not completely fake but a little bit fake. I had the faith based like God told me to get in get my body into shape and I do believe God told me to get my body in shape but spiritually I wasn't in the place to really receive the right calling from God. Right. And I did notice like once I started getting into shape discipline started taking place in my life but I went so far in that I got self-consumed and I've noticed a lot of guys like you were talking about it it c got to a point of obsession. A lot of guys who get really into fitness they they get to that point of obsession where that's all they can think about. Like literally that's how I was I dove into nutrition I started listening to the podcast and tried to consume all the information I could and at the same time I was forgetting my relationship with my creator with God later down the road when God kind of stops me in my tracks it was like all that discipline that I learned through fitness and nutrition I started applying to my spiritual journey. Changed my relationship with God and led me to where I am right now.

SPEAKER_00 8:36

So is that is that what you teach men and how do you how do you do that in terms of teaching them like hey this applies to your spiritual journey as well is that the I just want to make sure I'm understanding the question. Yeah yeah okay yeah so it really does because you know we think of self-control um and we think of discipline and those those are biblical characteristics and oftentimes the best way to learn them is through some type of physical fitness is through some type of you know nutrition because once you kind of build those habits once you learn those habits and you're able to apply them and apply them well like you said Mark you can you can take those and then apply them to your spiritual journey you know you can apply them to your marriage you can apply them to you know your relationship with your kids because you're building you're building these habits of discipline you're building these habits of self-control you know with your nutrition and and what you're putting into your body and the discipline in terms of like going to the gym regularly doing workouts regularly or you know at home workouts or whatever you're doing. And then you're also building the self-confidence piece at the same time and you know the self-confidence piece just allows you to show up as a better version of yourself for your wife for your kids for the people that God has put into your life and I don't mean self-confidence like arrogance. I mean self-confidence like exactly you know I feel good about the way that God made me he's made me this way and I'm confident in my identity and who I am as his son because I'm I'm living through it and I'm taking care of the body that he gave me well. That's a big piece to it as well.

SPEAKER_04 10:13

Yeah I think that's where a lot of people get lost because they're like oh I'm I gotta die to myself but at the same time you need to take care of yourself. God gave you a temple to take care of it so so true.

SPEAKER_00 10:29

We we as I I see this so much with men and I'm sure you do too Mark we we take this we take this this verse um you know we we talk about I forget who asked Jesus the question but um what is the greatest commandment it is to love your love your God you know with all your heart their heart and soul mind strength and then and then but the second one is love your neighbor as yourself. And we as Christians we we've we've construed this in some type of way where we think that that means we just have to love our neighbors well we forget that it says we have to love our neighbors as we love ourselves not we love our neighbors more than we love ourselves not we love our neighbors less than we love ourselves the prerequisite to loving your neighbor well the prerequisite to loving your wife well the prerequisite to loving your kids well is loving yourself well right like Jesus just like it's it's it's assumed in that verse that we're gonna love ourselves and I see a lot of guys today Mark they don't like themselves. They don't love themselves and they're trying to give and give and give and give and give and give and they don't have anything to give they're not they're not giving from a place of abundance like they're yeah there's yeah exactly they're they're continuing to try to pour from an empty cup and nothing's coming out and they're wondering why their life feels empty and you know why their marriage isn't where they want it to be or why their relationship with their kids isn't where they want it to be like they desire those things but they're just constantly giving giving giving giving giving and they're not getting anything back and you you can't give from an empty cup. You can't it it's impossible you can't do it. Right.

SPEAKER_04 12:07

And I know in the in the fitness space I don't know so much about the Christian world I really haven't other than myself and a few other friends that I have I haven't really dove into how more fit Christians deal with their journey but I know when I was in it before before I got really closer to God a lot of the fitness space they they'll beat themselves up rather than help themselves like hey I I ate a pizza last night so now I gotta go run ten miles to burn that off. And all you're doing is punishing yourself. You're not loving yourself. So you're talking about how guys just don't don't love themselves and they beat themselves up.

SPEAKER_00 12:53

Yes yeah and you see I mean you see in the fitness space too as well as the Christian space. I mean that we have a um I have a joke with you know some friends that are that are fit and coaches that I know and it's this kind of joke about uh body dysmorphia I'm sure you've heard that term um yeah and it's you know the people the people that are in the best shape usually have the worst cases of body dysmorphia uh in terms of like you know not being happy with where they are and then you know right people looking at me like holy cow you look incredible and they're just like I look terrible I don't work hard enough it's like come on we got to we got to fix that but right it can be a very serious thing.

SPEAKER_04 13:33

So how how do you how do you coach a guy against beating himself up and more towards loving himself?

SPEAKER_00 13:42

It's a good very good question. So I've had to work through this uh this is something that I have struggled with tremendously is that constant feeling of not being good enough and that constant feeling of having to strive for perfection at all times. Um so thankfully I've had you know I've invested time and invested resources into mentors and I have one uh and still still work with him to this day that has really helped me in resetting my identity and how I view myself as God's son. So in terms of you know how do we coach guys through this process of like beating themselves up one of the examples that I like to use is most of the guys I work with are dads. So one of the examples that I like to use is looking at your kids your kids are learning as they grow. Like your kids are going to make mistakes your kids are going to spill the juice they're gonna break the glass they're gonna you know whatever they're gonna just do things at school that they shouldn't do. And the biggest piece of that is like they're just learning they're figuring out how to survive in life and as their dad that loves them tremendously do you chastise them and punish them and talk down to them for every little mistake that they make most of the time no because you love your kids. Right God is our heavenly father so if we don't expect perfection from our children and God is on such a higher level than we are that we can't even fathom the kind of love that he has for us why do you like why do you think he expects perfection out of you? Like do you think he expects perfection out of you? No Do you think he's do you think he's chastising you and beating you up every time you make a mistake as you're learning and growing through life? Of course not right so it's it's just that that reframe of like okay you know I I have to look at my relationship with Christ my relationship with my heavenly father like I look at my relationship with my kids I'm their father this is how much I love them. This is how much I want to see them succeed. My heavenly father is on such a higher level than me that I can't even fathom it. So how much more does he want to see me succeed? How much more does he want to see me go through life and and enjoy it and you know make these mistakes and learn from these mistakes and grow but not just beat me up like that's not that's not the process we're taking. So it's just shifting that mindset and reframing everything.

SPEAKER_04 16:37

Yeah I love that I love that. So have you had those times in your life where you're like I'm you know I just don't feel like I'm enough and you called on God like what do I do now? How do I how do I get over this? You got you got a story to tell about it.

SPEAKER_00 16:56

Um man it's been I think the the biggest one of the biggest examples I see in terms of like seeing that in my own life is starting a business. I did it part-time for a few years before that and man there's been there's been so many days and so many times where you know something didn't go like I thought it should or you know as I'm learning in the business things you know processes and things are taking longer than I think they should and um man it's a it's a constant it's a constant battle in terms of like am I good enough am I am I doing the right things like am I doing everything that I could be doing. I mean it's it's and part of that is just the journey of entrepreneurship in general and then you know part of that is having to having to realign where my identity is because my temptation mark is to put my identity in my achievements and put my identity in how hard I work and how good I show up and it's like okay I'm good enough if this happens I'm good enough if I achieve this level of success and it's like that's not true. That's my temptation that's where I go but the truth is the God of the universe and the savior of the world has already died on the cross for me and already says that I'm good enough and it does not matter what I do because I can't I can't earn that so it's just that constant reminder of who we are in Christ and what that looks like and what it looks like to live from that identity and that identity in abundance versus I have to achieve achieve achieve achieve achieve in order to earn God's best because like God's already given it you you can't you can't earn it. There's nothing you can do to earn it.

SPEAKER_04 18:56

Yeah. I I could imagine though because I I you were in a corporate job before you did this and you said you started a year ago it had to be a huge step of faith. Because you had a you had a guaranteed paycheck correct I did. And now I did now you're you're stepping into something that you're gonna I don't know I don't know where you were I know you said you did it part-time a little bit but now you've got to gather clients you gotta start building a reputation online and getting getting clients so what what did that look like and how how did you walk that out with your with your wife and your family very good very good question.

SPEAKER_00 19:36

So I had uh one other interview I was I did recently and somebody asked me about what that looks like to to walk it out with my wife and that was the first time I got that question. I love that question because it was so good. But yeah so I'll just kind of sum up the journey a little bit um so when I left I left my corporate job it's been a little over two years ago um I had been pretty unhappy there for quite some time I was very I was very capped on my paycheck um there wasn't really any room for advancement I had been passed over probably two times um for promotion I tried to move up a little bit and it just didn't work out and so I was not content there for quite some time and I knew that there was something more and also I had kids or I had a son at the time I had a wife my wife stays at home with the kids so it's a it's a world one income household so it's like you know it was very much a golden handcuff situation. It was like I have a guaranteed paycheck I have health insurance I have a company vehicle um I had a company gas card like there were a lot of a lot of small perks that were not easy to walk away from um but really the the kind of stepping stone like the the kick in the pants per se was my wife got pregnant with our second son and we were already very tight financially um and I pretty much went to them and was like I need to make more money like this isn't doing it anymore and they're like okay good luck in a sense um I was like all right so I was on a I was kind of on a time clock at that point and so I started looking and found a sales position with a solar company uh doing door to door sales a hundred percent commission no insurance no anything um but they basically promised me a bunch of money if if I worked hard and learned quickly and I was like I can do that no worries um so went into that position it turned out not to be what I expected it to be and uh did not make the kind of money that I was promised and even the people that were in that office like that were making commission on everyone in there weren't making the kind of money that they were talking about. Some of them were but most of them were not um so anyway left there um I went back to doing home repair style work because I was, I had, I have a background in some construction and I had done kind of home repair as a business prior to that, uh, just as a side gig. So I went back to doing that and then was doing coaching also. So I was doing both of them at the same time, but neither business was established enough to where clients were calling me. I had to go get clients for both businesses. And it eventually got to the point I was like, I'm trying to grow both of these at the same time, and there's only one that I actually want to get bigger. Um, and that was the coaching side of it. So I stopped doing home repair and went full out into coaching and just started putting all of my time and resources into that. So that's where we are now.

SPEAKER_04 22:41

Wow. And I'm I'm assuming God has blessed you through that.

SPEAKER_00 22:46

He has, man. Uh it's not been, you know, it's not been all puppies and rainbows by any means. Um, but you know, we we haven't missed a bill. He's he's taken very good care of us. And you know, obviously there's there's still a lot that I want to do. There's a lot of growth that we have to do, you know, financially. Um, but it's you know, it's one of those things that the work is so fulfilling. Um it it makes it obviously it's not always easy, but um it makes it easier to to get up and do the work when it's when it's when you know you're in the right place. So that's been just a blessing there.

SPEAKER_04 23:24

So yeah. So though in your in your coaching, I know you know it's mostly fitness and nutrition, but I'm assuming it probably goes well beyond that. There are times when you have to actually counsel guys through difficult times in their life. So what it what does that look like?

SPEAKER_00 23:45

Yes, there is. And you know, I have a a good friend of mine. Coaching is, you know, strength and nutrition coaching is not all about fitness, it's very much a people business. Um, and the, you know, I've gotten into the weeds with several of my clients. And usually it's kind of, you know, right off the bat, like the first, the first piece of the the process before we even start working together is we we go into an about an hour and a half, really kind of deep dive uh coaching call in terms of like what's going on in their life, you know, how does this show up day to day and how they're a husband, how they're a father, you know, how they view themselves as their identity in Christ. Um, so we get pretty pretty deep right off the bat. And you know, through our time together, there's a lot of times we're talking about marriage, we're talking about kids, we're talking about um job and finances and what that looks like. And so it's just at this point, Mark, we I really do that, I just let that come naturally. Um, you know, there there is, I'm exploring doing a little bit of different coaching where we're doing that specifically, but right now we're just kind of doing that naturally as it comes up in in our time together working through the strength of nutrition.

SPEAKER_04 24:59

You talk about fitness as a spiritual leadership. Can you unpack that a little bit?

SPEAKER_00 25:06

Yeah, so fitness is a very good way to build habits that carry over directly into your spirituality, into your relationships. Um, you're building habits of discipline, you're building habits of self-control, and you're able to kind of take those habits that you've built and those disciplines that you've built and apply it to every other area of life. So whether that's spiritual, whether that is mental, whether that's in your relationships, um, you know, you're building things like discipline, you're building things like self-control, you're building things like resiliency, um, you're building things like perseverance. So all of those things directly transfer into your you know spiritual walk, into your you know, mental fortitude, um, into your relationship with your wife. And the one of the biggest pieces of that is it's just a really good foundational form of self-leadership. And as you learn how to lead yourself through that process, then you can lead yourself into other endeavors when it involves you know growing spiritually and things like that.

SPEAKER_04 26:08

Yeah. I I see a lot of, and I wasn't one of those guys for a long time. I was I was 48 when I discovered fitness and starting. I'm like, it's time to start becoming the man that I'm supposed to be. I see a lot of men, Christian men, stuck on the sidelines just flailing, basically not knowing what to do next. What do you think got us there? And how do we get out of it? I I other than the the, you know, I I I'm gonna say it's gonna sound like I'm gonna say it's simple just to start getting yourself in shape and disciplining yourself. Which the process is a simple process, but actually getting up and doing it isn't as easy as it sounds sometimes for some men. So how did we get there and how do we get out of it?

SPEAKER_00 27:06

Yeah, that's good. I think there's two main things that got us there, and I think they're kind of tied to each other. So the first piece that I would like to unpack and that I would like to mention is we don't have enough strong men and leader leadership positions in the church that are willing to say things that are offensive and that are hard for people to hear. Um, so that is that is one piece of the puzzle. Um can you give me an example? Yes. So we can we tie it directly to the conversation that we're having. Gluttony biblically is a sin. I have never heard a pastor preach on gluttony. Ever. I've been in church my entire life. Um, because that's gonna hurt a lot of people's feelings. Right. Lack of self-control is a sin. Now I've heard that preached on in terms of lack of sexual self-control. I have not heard that preached on in terms of lack of self-control when it comes to the dinner table. Um, so and then the other the the and this kind of ties into this. Also, the other thing that I that got us there is there's for a long time men I don't feel like have felt welcome in the church. Um, I think we have the church has been steered more towards women and children. And so men haven't felt welcome there, so there's there's less of a masculine presence there. So there's not there's not a lot of really good teaching on what it means to be a biblical man. Now I am seeing more of that coming out now, which is good and it's refreshing. Um, and you know, obviously we have to be careful because you know there are there are people preaching things that you know aren't aren't biblical, and we need to kind of look and see, you know, we need to uh push the Andrew Tates out of the bunch, um not saying he's he's biblical in any in any sense, but some of the stuff that he says is true and and aligns with that.

SPEAKER_04 29:27

Um unfortunately he's reaching young men that he shouldn't be reaching.

SPEAKER_00 29:32

Exactly, exactly. Uh, but I am seeing good godly men step up and lead in this area, which is really refreshing and really good. Yeah. So in terms of you know how we got there, I think I think those two pieces are really big. Um, and then you know, this men have been beat down for a long time in terms of your masculinity as bad. Um, you know, you should be softer, you should be gentler, you should be kinder, you should be nicer, and that's all that you should be. And it's it's gotten so bad to where most men don't feel like they have a voice and they don't feel like they have a choice. So I think a lot of men are sitting on the sidelines of life. A lot of Christian men are sitting on the sidelines of life, and I don't even know if they realize it. Like that's that's the that's the that's the piece that I'm starting to understand now is I think they're just extremely unhappy and extremely unfulfilled, and they don't know why, and they don't know how to not be that way. Um so that's why it's important for us to have conversations like we're having tonight.

SPEAKER_04 30:32

Yeah, it's it's definitely they don't know how. Because what I've seen is I'll see a guy who's like, okay, I I'm gonna start stepping up and being the man I'm supposed to be, and then he overcompensates and tells his wife, This is what we're gonna do. I'm the head of the house and you're gonna listen to me. Yeah, he becomes a tyrant. Right. Becomes a tyrant. Our our example to be the men that we're supposed to be is Jesus Christ. It says in Ephesians, love your wives as Christ loved the church. He was a lion and a lamb. Yep. And I I think the church for right, exactly. The church for too long focused so much on the gentle lamb of Jesus and didn't focus enough on the lion. And I I was gonna say, I don't know what your context is right now, but in my context right now, the church that I'm in, I'm seeing strong men starting to step up and and show true biblical masculinity. And I believe, you know, it's guys like you, guys like me and other guys. I don't know if you've heard of uh Joe B. Martin out of Florida.

SPEAKER_00 31:42

Oh yeah, love that guy.

SPEAKER_04 31:43

Yeah, like I'm seeing a shift. Yes, you know, I I'm grateful for it because we definitely need me myself as a man in my late 40s who was one of those wimpy men who didn't do anything, you know. So yeah, I I appreciate what you're doing. I want you to know that.

SPEAKER_00 32:05

Oh man, thank you. That uh that means a lot. I and and it's just you know, it there is a shift happening and it is refreshing. And um, I'm excited to see what comes of it. And I'm thankful that we found a church that's you know that's really good. And we have a pastor that is not scared to say things that are offensive because they're true. Um, but the you know, kind of a piece that you hit on, Mark, is like we think when a when a guy let's just say he he he wakes up and he goes, I'm going to be a godly man, where does he go to find out what that looks like?

SPEAKER_03 32:43

Right.

SPEAKER_00 32:44

Because church isn't teaching that. Most of the churches, I'm not saying all of them, most churches, you'll never hear a sermon about what it looks like to be a man, and you'll never hear a sermon about what it looks like to be a woman. Because those are gonna offend someone. There's gonna be a feminist woman in the audience that is offended. There's gonna be an effeminate man in the audience that is offended. So that's that's not gonna fly because men and women are different. God made them different for a very, very, very good reason. Like we both are equal in worth and value, but we have different roles to play. And that that has we've gotten so far away from that, particularly in church, because it's like, oh, we can't use terms like that. Those are scary, those are offensive. So we'll just pretend like everybody's, you know, everybody's the same. Everybody's the same. It's like, no, well, we're the same in God's eyes in terms of value, in terms of worth. We're not the same in terms of like we have different purposes. Men are better at some things, women are better at some things, they complement each other, but men, men don't know how to be men because they're not being taught how to be men. The world is teaching them, the world is saying, either A, you know, you're gonna have I'm getting passionate, you have to excuse me. Either A, cut your balls off, or B, go be Andrew Tate. Like those are the two examples that we're seeing in the world. It's like be a wuss or be Andrew Tate. Neither one of those is correct. Correct, right, absolutely. You know, for women, their their example is girl, you don't ever need to have kids, you don't need no man. Like, go run a company, that's more important than anything else. And it's like the um when when did when did you know being like your career get more important than having children? Right. And raising children's next generation? Like, what? How's being a CEO in some little cubicle freaking office space more important than raising the next generation? So we we've we've yeah, I'm gonna get off my soapbox, but that's that's where I see a lot of the problem there.

SPEAKER_04 34:53

No, no. I I'm I'm glad you went there. Yeah, I I I'm not gonna push back in any way because I absolutely agree. I I think we tend to worry too much about offense. I tell I tell my friends, some of my closest brothers, you're here to sharpen me. You see me doing something wrong, going down the wrong way, grab me. Grab me by the shirt and say, hey buddy, slap me across the face if you need to. I need to be sharpened. I need it. We need to be offended. We need to not worry about being offended, especially men.

SPEAKER_00 35:32

Yes, I agree. There was a um sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you. Go ahead. No, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 35:38

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_00 35:39

There was a um clip that I saw. Uh Kyle Thompson is another one of these guys that's really in the fight for this. Um there was a speech that he did, and I might butcher this, but he was joking about the term, you know, how overused the term iron sharpened iron is in church, like how overused it is in church. And he was talking about most he said most of the time when that verse is used, they they basically mean two tubes of toothpaste rubbing together. Like that's their version of iron sharpening iron. He's like, no, I which I thought was great. I was like, yes, iron sharpening iron is violent. Right. Like it is you grabbing your brother by the scruff of the neck and going, hey pal, you're you're messing this up. Right. You are not doing this right. And if you keep doing it this way, you're gonna have severe problems. Right. Like, that's what it is. It's it's offensive, it's confrontational, it's real, it's honest. Like, I don't know about you, Mark. It sounds like you've kind of gone this direction too. The men that I am closest to, the men that I spend the most time with, are men that I respect enough to go, hey bud, like I will kick him, I will kick him in the nuts if he needs it, and he better do it to me. Otherwise, like we're we're not gonna have that relationship because I have I have an obligation to live out of this place and do the things that God has called me to do, and I am incapable of doing that unless I have other men in my corner that are able to grab me by the scruff of the neck and tell me when I am wrong and and jacking up and get me back straight. Like that as men.

SPEAKER_04 37:14

Yeah, if if I'm about to fall in a ditch, I don't want you to pat me on the back and say, Hey, just turn to the left a little. No, grab me. Yes, pull me away from that ditch, don't let me fall into it. Yes, that is what a true friend does, and it talks about that in Proverbs. Yes, a true friend is born for adversity.

SPEAKER_00 37:35

Yes, yes. It's not this, it's not this, oh, I don't want to hurt your feelings. Like, nobody. If I need my feelings hurt, you better hurt my feelings, or we're not hanging out anymore. That's how it's gonna go.

SPEAKER_04 37:46

Yeah. I'm I'm loving this conversation. Um, there is a question I ask every man that comes on the podcast, and I have a feeling I know where you're gonna go with this. In 1 Samuel 22, David ran into the cave of Adulum after he slew Goliath. Saul was chasing him because Saul knew David was gonna be the next king. While he was in that cave, the men of the kingdom were disgruntled, disheartened, discouraged, didn't know what to do next. So they they came to David in the cave. They spent time with David in the cave before he became king of Judah and then king of Israel. While they were under David's tutelage, he led them to become David's mighty men. Modern day, you got a group of men in front of you who are disgruntled, disheartened, discouraged, looking for leadership, looking for direction.

SPEAKER_03 38:35

What would you say to them? That's a good question. Step number one is looking in the mirror.

SPEAKER_00 38:48

Like we need to get we need to get real and honest with where you are, and we need to get real and honest with if you're willing to make changes. Because that's the first step to anything. Like you're disgruntled, you're upset, you're worn out, you know, the you're you're sitting on the sidelines of life and you want to know what to do next, look in the mirror. Where are you falling short? Get real about where you're falling short. It's not it's not a shame thing, like there's no condemnation or anything like that. We just need to have a baseline of where you are and what needs to improve, and if you're willing to do the work, and if you're willing to do the work, like we can go from there. But you have to be willing to put down your pride, you have to be willing to go. I am open to the work and I'm open to being upfront and honest, and then the sky's the limit from there. But there there has to be that established baseline of that humility, like you and I were talking about before. Um, I'm humble enough to where if I'm wrong, I just someone that's close to me better tell me, and I will receive it, period. Like there is no, I can't believe you said that to me. It is, I respect you. Thank you for telling me. Um, but you there has to be a degree of humility there, like because if you're prideful, that does not work. So the the look in the mirror, the very much a fresh and honest, like, this is where we are, and that is okay because this is where we're gonna go from here. Yep.

SPEAKER_04 40:18

Yeah, and that that's the moment that we get to like that moment where I I change and God told me that I needed to get in shape. I was sitting at a coffee table in front of a bowl of Captain Crunch, going, God, what is wrong with me? Why am I apathetic? Why aren't I happy? And then I drove drove to work that day. I was like, You're you're you're not in shape. Get yourself in shape and see what happens. But I had that that moment of awakening, okay, something needs to change. Unfortunately, I didn't have men in my corner at that point. But got God sent them to me.

unknown 40:56

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 40:57

But yeah, that's that's absolutely where we need to get. That moment of humility, like, okay, I'm I need help.

SPEAKER_00 41:05

There's there's something that you just said, Mark, that I I want to I want to kind of circle back on because I think it's really important. We've talked, we've talked how important it is to have men in your corner that will grab you by the scruff of the neck when you need it. And I didn't have those men for a long time. And you just said something. You said God should like God brought them to me, but he brought them to you after you started moving a direction of self-improvement, of some type of I got humble and I started working. Yeah, and that very same thing happened to me. I was listening to self-help books, I was listening to podcasts, I was listening to, you know, all of this stuff, and I'm like, all I keep hearing is you're the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. Yeah. And I'm like, I want to find these people that I'm supposed to spend time with that are gonna make me better. I didn't know where they were. I'm like, God, like, I know this is right. I know this is what I'm supposed to do, but I don't know where they are, I don't know where to find them. Like, I so, but when I started putting in the work, and the biggest thing for me was when I invested in my first mentorship and I invested in my first coaching program, those are the men that I have in my corner now. And that was three years ago, four years ago. But I had to pay to get a seat at the table with those men. Yeah. And I found those men because those men were willing to pay to get a seat at that table also. So I invested to better myself, to better my marriage, to better my family. They invested to better themselves, to better their marriage, to better their family. So now we're on the same page. It's like you looked in the mirror, I looked in the mirror, cool, let's do this together. Right. But I had to get a seat at that table, and you had to start moving forward, Mark. I had to start moving forward. You're not gonna sit on your couch and find the type of men that will grab you by the scruff of your neck. You have to go out and get to work and get them, and then they will come to you.

unknown 43:11

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 43:11

So I wanted to hit on that. I think that's really important.

SPEAKER_04 43:13

Yeah, yeah. And the scripture that came to mind while you were talking about that, just to just in getting closer to God. James says, draw near to God, and he'll draw near to you. That starts with you drawing near. Then God comes near to you. You you have to take that first step. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 43:32

Amen.

SPEAKER_04 43:34

With all that being said, how can guys take that four first step on a journey with you? How can they reach out to you?

SPEAKER_00 43:42

So I would just say direct message DM, um, Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok. Uh so Facebook at Sean McManus, Instagram, uh, TikTok, and X is at the Sean McManus. So I'm I'm on all of those platforms, mostly Instagram and Facebook, most often. Um but yeah, just send me any any of those platforms. Happy to chat. Happy just to see where you are, you know, see where your sticking points are and and how I can help get you uh to the right next step. Even if we you know we decided not to work together. I'm still happy to to help you move along in your process.

SPEAKER_04 44:16

Awesome. Sounds good. Sean, thank you very much for coming on and be happy to have another conversation with you. Just hit me up. I think we had a great conversation. I think a lot of men are going to be blessed by it.

SPEAKER_00 44:28

I hope so, Mark. Thank you for the opportunity, man. It's been a pleasure speaking with you.

SPEAKER_04 44:31

Yeah, you too. God bless you.

SPEAKER_00 44:33

Thank you, brother.

SPEAKER_04 44:35

If there's one thing I want you to take away from this conversation, it's this. You were never meant to carry the weight of your life alone. Like Sean said, most men are trying to pour from an empty cup. And isolation is what keeps that cup empty. Strength grows in brotherhood. Discipline grows in brotherhood. Iron sharpens iron, and the man you're becoming is shaped by the men you're with. So if you're tired of doing this on your own, if you're looking for other men to come alongside of you, if you're ready to step into the life God is calling you to step into, then join my community on school. There will be a link in the show notes. I am getting ready. May 1st is coming, and I have a lot of plans in mind. I am going to be sharing encouragements every day. There are other men in that group who are looking for encouragement, looking to level up, looking to become the men that God has called them to be, looking to come off the sidelines and get in the game. If you want to be one of those men, if you want to come alongside with other brothers, click that link in the community. And when you join, there is a pinned post on there where you can introduce yourself, tell who you are, what you're struggling with, whatever it may be. You can DM me and I'll be happy to help. If you're listening on YouTube, uh leave a comment below. I may actually pin a comment below because what I'm trying to do is get engagement. I'm not that concerned about followers and likes and views and all that. I want to hear from other men. I want to know what you're struggling with. So leave a comment below. You can send a text on Buzz Sprout. There's literally multiple ways to engage with me. So and I've mentioned it time and time again. And if you really want to do me a really great favor, if you got anything out of this episode, if you've listened in the past and things have stood out to you, helped you in your life in any way, go on Apple and leave a five star review because it really does help get this message out to more men. More men need to know how to level up in their faith and how to get off the sidelines and get in the game. So with that, stay strong, stay valiant, keep forging your path, and be blessed.