Why Good Men Keep Doubting Themselves | Gideon and the Lie of Inadequacy

Why do so many Christian men struggle with feeling like they're not enough?

In this episode of The Valiant Forge Podcast, we're continuing the Broken Men, Faithful God series by looking at the life of Gideon.

Before Gideon ever led Israel to victory, he saw himself as the weakest man from the weakest family. But God saw something completely different.

If you've ever felt unqualified, inexperienced, or like everyone else is more equipped than you, Gideon's story reminds us that confidence isn't found in ourselves. It's found in trusting the God who calls us.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why Gideon's greatest battle wasn't against the Midianites

• The difference between humility and insecurity

• Why God reduced Gideon's army to only 300 men

• How God builds confidence through faith, not self-belief

• A personal story about learning to stop hiding behind false humility

Confidence isn't believing in yourself. It's believing God is who He says He is.

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Transcript

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One of the biggest lies that Christian men believe about themselves is that God couldn't use someone like them. Maybe they think they're not qualified, maybe they think they're inexperienced, they don't know enough scripture, maybe everyone else around you seems more qualified than you. So you wait. You wait until you feel ready. You wait until you know more so you can feel more confident. But what if confidence isn't what you're supposed to wait for? What if the biggest thing holding you back isn't your ability? But it's the lie you're believing about yourself. I was that guy for a long time, and I still am to some point, but I'm getting over it. And today I'm going to tell you about a man in the Bible who had the same experience. I'm Mark Osborne, and this is the Valiant Forge podcast, where Christian men come to forge purpose and strength in Christ. In the book of Judges, uh Judges six, Gideon and the Israelites were being oppressed by the Midianites, but the story isn't about the Midianites and how Gideon overcame them. It's about how Gideon believed that he wasn't worthy enough to be the man to lead Israel into defeating the Midianites. When we first read about Gideon, we find him hiding in a wine press. I've talked about this story a number of times now because it is really the story that brought me to where I am today. But we find him hiding in a wine press. He had this survival mindset, this mentality that, you know, I'm going to do as much as I can because I'm a coward and I'm a loser, so the best I can do is find a place to hide and try to just survive. And how many times do us men just do what we can to get by and survive? Because we believe that's all that we have. We believe that's the best of us. And if we're really being honest, we hide because we're in fear. And fear doesn't just change what you do, it changes what you believe about yourself. So while Gideon was hiding in that wine press, it says the angel of the Lord came upon him, and that was God, God Almighty. When it says the angel of the Lord in the Old Testament, that's called a Christophany. That's when Jesus Christ showed up, and he said, Hail, O mighty man of Valor, the Lord is with you. I'm sure Gideon's response was like, Um, you see me here hiding in a wine press, who are you calling a mighty man of Valor? I'm I'm actually hiding right now, so I'm not so mighty. Who's he speaking to? Is he speaking to Gideon? Gideon didn't think so, because Gideon's response was I am from the weakest clan and I am the weakest in my clan. Like Gideon thought he was the lowest of the lows. Now, how many times have you said I am not worthy? I I'm not good at talking in front of people. I'm not a bold person. I'm not a good father, I'm not a good husband. I just can't I can't manage my finances the way these other guys do. I can't step up and lead the way these other guys do. I can't take care of myself the way these other guys do. I'm just not that guy. Notice something about all these things that you say about yourself. I. They all start with I. And a very interesting part of this is when Gideon starts making those excuses. God doesn't try to just build them up in confidence. Oh no, no, you you're good, you're good. You can do this, you can. God lets Gideon know I will be with you. He doesn't say, Yeah, you you really are a mighty warrior, just don't believe that about yourself. He lets him know that he is not alone, that God's presence is with him. And that's what we need to know today. I say this every time. And honestly, it's getting to the point to where even for myself, it's getting annoying. People say you're so humble about your lack of ability and your lack of confidence in yourself, and it's it's starting to get annoying. And I think I think it's starting to frustrate God. I doubt it because he's so loving and faithful and merciful. But I know I need to stop doing it. I've been going on these uh discussions called men's roundtable discussions, and I'm surrounded by men who are men's life coaches, some of them are preachers, and some of them, you know, they've been on the journey a lot longer than I have, and I I come in there with this humility of like, oh, I don't have a lot to say. You guys, you know, you guys have a lot more to say. But you know what? When I go on these podcasts, when I go on these different things, I'm not alone. The Lord is with me. So I'm gonna stop saying that. I'm not gonna stop, you know, saying that I'm never gonna start saying that this is all me. Because I've been on that journey and that that's a road to destruction. I never do any of this alone. I do this with God. If you see my confidence start to change, it's not because I'm all of a sudden starting to believe in myself. As a Christian, confidence isn't about believing in yourself. It's about believing God is who he says he is. And if God says he will be with me when I go to talk on these microphones, when I go to do these podcasts, when I go on these channels with these other high-level Christian men, God says, I will be with you. If I truly believe that God is with me, then I don't have to worry about my uh lack of understanding. I don't have to worry about the fact that I don't have a seminary degree. I don't have to worry about that I don't know as much scripture as other people. I don't have to worry about the fact that I've not been on the road as long as they have. My wisdom that I have, 59 years of living, is part of it, but most of it is the wisdom that I get from God. I don't do any of this alone. God is always with me. And that this believing in God thing isn't a snap of the fingers. If you go back to Gideon's story, what Gideon had to do, even after an angel of the Lord shows up out of nowhere while he's hiding in a wine press, he had to make fleeces just because he wasn't sure. Are you really God? Are you really an angel? So he put a meal before him. The angel ate the meal. I'm paraphrasing, it's it's a little different than that. He put a few fleeces before him, and I don't want to hang up get hung up on the fleeces because the fleeces are just a part of the story. But really, God showed up every time, and that's what God will do for you. He will meet you where you are. My God is a patient God. He was patient with me. He met me where I was. Now I'm a little further down the road. He's asking me to step up, to do more, to be more. And I know he's with me. Sometimes I'm gonna stumble, sometimes I'm gonna struggle a little bit, but he's patient and he'll meet me where I am and he'll do the same for you. People like to say take a leap of faith, but sometimes faith is built by small steps. Mine started with small steps. I went out and got a microphone, I recorded some audio podcasts, and then I went and got a I got a camera, started posting on YouTube, started showing my face more. Then I started speaking in front of other people. Then I started going on other podcasts, small steps, and I'm still, you know, every time that I go and do something, I have to remember that God is with me. So when you say to yourself, I am not enough, I'm not confident enough, I don't know enough scripture, I'm just not that guy, you are not alone. God is with you. If God is telling you to do something, then go out and do it. Take a small step, don't take a leap of faith. I'm not gonna say that's bad advice, that's good advice sometimes, but in order for your faith to grow, you have to start small sometimes. And that's what happened with Gideon. God gave him a small task to start with. He went and tore down the asheroth in his father's yard. And honestly, if you go and read that story, I'm not gonna read it right now. I'm kind of I'm trying to be a little bit more concise and quick on these podcasts, but if you go and read the story, you'll find out that they gave Gideon a new name in the town, which was Jerubabel. It changed his identity. He was no longer the weakest in the weakest clan. He was now someone who was a warrior for God. So Gideon's next step was to take on the hundreds of thousands of Midianites, and he gathered all of Israel, and he was all right in the beginning. He ended up with 32,000 guys. That's that's all right. It's still not enough for hundreds of thousands of Midianites, but at least we have an army now, right? God said, nah, that's too many. We need to dwindle this down. And if you know the story, he ended up dwindling it down to 300. Why would God make this harder? Gideon already admitted that he has a hard time believing in himself, but God just made it harder. I think sometimes God makes it harder so you trust him more and trust in yourself less. Because that's what's happened for me. He's made it harder. He's given me more opportunities to speak in front of people without any preparation to go on these. By the way, real quickly, every Thursday night, uh, I think his channel is Mr. U. If you could just do a search for Mr. U, and I'll have that. I'll have a link for that in the show notes. Every Thursday night, there's a men's roundtable discussion where we talk about a lot of different men's issues. I'm not on it every week, but there are a lot of great men that talk on it every week, and you can ask questions yourself in the comments. So if you're if you're a man out there and you're struggling with stuff, that is the place to go. But God has given me these opportunities. I go on there, I have no idea what I'm gonna say. Sometimes, like this podcast, I have a little bit of an idea what I'm gonna say. You know, I do kind of map it out and think about what I'm gonna say and talk about it for a while. This just to show, for a while I was like putting out a whole script and basically just reading off the script, cutting, pasting, and now I have some bullet points on a note in front of me on my computer. And if you see me like pause for a few minutes, look away, and then I I go I'm going and reading my notes. I used to do these just obviously, and part of the reason that is a good idea to do scripts because you tend to ramble, which means I need to wrap this up a little bit. So get back to Gideon. Gideon strips away, or God strips away the army down to 300, and Gideon goes and sees the victory. 300 men and the 300 men didn't even really have to fight. God basically won the whole battle for them. So they it was it was over. Gideon's confidence grew in him. But it wasn't the battle that made Gideon a mighty warrior that gave him the victory. He was that before the battle. God knew that Gideon was a valiant warrior before that battle. And God knows that about you. If he's calling you to do something and you don't feel worthy, remember that he is with you. You won't have to do it alone. Just make that first step of faith. And you won't even you may not feel it, you may feel it. Take that first step of faith, and he will be right there with you holding your hand. What identity are you believing about yourself that God never gave you? I've done a few podcasts before about identity, and if you look through the Bible, there are scriptures all through the Bible that tell you who you really are in God. I'm just gonna say one right now. You are more than a conqueror. You are a mighty man of God. When God said that to Gideon, he was saying that to all of us. Everything you read in the Bible is about you. The stories are true, the stories are real, but they're there for you to help you, to help you on your journey, to help you on your work on your walk. That's why the Bible is living active and sharper than the two-edged sword, and that's why this book has been carrying on for 2,000 years because it helps men like us grow and men like us to become better. I'm gonna leave you with this. Self-confidence isn't about believing in yourself. It's about believing that God is who he says he is. Now, next week I'm gonna talk about Samson, and I'm not gonna necessarily just talk about Samson's strength. I'm gonna be talking about how Samson keeps sabotage, kept sabotaging himself, and how us men tend to sabotage ourselves. If you look on this screen somewhere, there's gonna be a video popping up about Elijah, and it, but it isn't about Elijah. It's about why Elijah felt so all alone. And sometimes us men feel all alone when we're not. With that, stay strong, stay valiant, keep forging your path, and be blessed.