Lets Chat NERVES 💖

In this episode of the DDI Dance Diaries podcast, we’re chatting all things nerves ✨ From pre-performance butterflies to competition anxiety and everyday overthinking, we’re sharing our own experiences, practical tips, and mindset shifts to help our dancers and even parents learn how to handle nerves. 

Remember... nerves and excitement feel the same in your belly 💖

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:02

Hi everyone and welcome to DDI Dance Diaries, a space for our dance family where we talk all things dance, confidence, mindset, and everything in between. Whether you're a dancer, a dance parent, or part of our DDI community, this is the behind the scenes look into the moments that shape not just dancers but people. Because here at DDI it's always been more than just dance.

SPEAKER_01 0:23

Okay guys, welcome back to today's episode of DDI Dance Diaries. Today we're gonna be spilling the tea on how to manage nerves, whether that is comp nerves, trying new things, or stepping out of the side of your comfort zone. We are gonna talk about all things nerves today. Who's feeling nervous today? Me.

SPEAKER_02 0:43

We push these guys out there comforts trying something new all the time. I know. I feel like I try and do something that makes me nervous at least once a week. Like I'm gonna say once a day there, and I was like, whoa, that's what she's called. Maybe once a week, I think. Yeah, yeah. Um but I think it's so important. Um but I think it's like how we manage it is the important thing. Because I think like sometimes like when the kids come in and it's maybe like their first class or whatever, and you can see that they're nervous. I think it's so important that we get down to their level, we like normalise it, we're like, it's okay, like everybody feels nervous, and just trying to bring it back to like it being normal because I think sometimes, especially when you're young and you maybe haven't experienced nerves before, like it probably feels like oh my god, like foreign.

SPEAKER_03 1:30

Yeah, yeah. Um sorry, Hugo. I was just gonna say, and for like kids coming in new, I feel like we've all got very like a positive energy and always have a smile on our faces because if they come in and the first thing they see is a raging face, they're not gonna think that face but we've got this face. Sorry, Amy, what were you gonna say?

SPEAKER_00 1:56

I was gonna say, I think like honestly, I do um the preschool classes uh on a Saturday with Ashley, and I think when we get new kids coming, so they're coming in sometimes at the age of two, yeah. Very, very young. And at that age is such an unfamiliar environment, it can be quite overwhelming because we'd get quite a lot of kids in A classes now. I think something that I find really important is like I'm obviously not a parent myself, but I think speaking to the parent be like, this is so normal because sometimes the mum's like, Oh my god, I'm so sorry, like I don't know why she's so upset, like, or whatever it is. And I'm like, but sorry for the side. But it is like and I think speaking to the parent, be like, no, that's so normal. Like I quite like to use an example of like one of the kids that are a bit older. So like I like to sometimes be like like point out, say one of the kids, and I'm like, She was the exact same when she started, and now she skips in and she doesn't look back, yeah. She's now staying for three classes. Yeah, yeah. So I think it's quite that's quite an important one when especially bringing tiny, tiny totes.

SPEAKER_01 2:48

But exposing to them to those nerves in that environment that early is great because they're like little sponges, and once they learn, oh, this is always time, they settle into focus. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a good time. We got a sweetie at the end. Always a good time. Do you want a sweetie? Yeah, no. The preschool one's quite good because they do get a wee sweetie or a sticker or a bear or something like that. Something fun. Um, how do we manage that when we get up to the bigger ages when they're maybe stepping into a competition team for the first time or they're a teenager and they're coming to try a class at rec level for the first time?

SPEAKER_00 3:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:21

I think that's where it starts to because that's by that point they've got preconceived notions in their head of what it's gonna be like, and if it doesn't meet that, or if it's not the way they thought it was gonna be, then that can be quite hard for them to manage. I think setting expectations before they come is quite um helpful. Yeah. We've set up something quite new recently where we're gonna be doing videos um as like our little welcome to DDI um email. And it's gonna show you the coach. Yeah, this is the coach, this is the environment, this is the space, how you get here, yeah. Because we do have quite a lot of kids who are anxious or their parents tell us they have anxiety before they come. We're not really experiencing that much anxiety in the studio, which is great, yeah, especially when all the parents are like that. You should see them at home, they're a bundle of nerves, or when they're at school, or I never thought she would do this and stuff like that. So that's really, really nice to constantly, you know, be told, Oh, it's lovely to see her out of comfort zone, it's lovely to see her trying new things and stuff like that. But it is about how you set up that environment for them.

SPEAKER_02 4:21

Yeah, it's reassuring that we're like providing that space for them to not be anxious and not be the maybe bundling nervous at the mum's sea at school or whatever.

SPEAKER_00 4:32

Um I think that's like a really simple one, but having the trials like they can actually come in and test a class and see if they enjoy it, so like they can sign up for that before they actually sign up fully to make that commitment. Like they can come in and what's it, two weeks we do, yeah. Come in and experience the class. And it could be something as simple as it's too noisy. Kids are like, Maybe not this one, but then maybe I'll try the next one. Yeah, and then it could be a case of week and then intervene, but well, here's a class we have on this night that's a wee bit quieter, there's not as many kids. It could be something as simple as that. But offering the trial at least gives them the time to come in and experience it, and nine times out of ten they book on and love it continue. But I think it's such a good option to have, so you're not just having to jump in with two feet, something that you're not sure of.

SPEAKER_02 5:16

So, how do you guys think parents can support us in our role and trying to keep the nerves positive self talk?

SPEAKER_01 5:26

Absolutely. And I'm talking about the parents' self because quite often I have noticed that if a parent's quite down on themselves at home about their maybe their image, the things that they do in their life, the thing like the exercise levels, anything like that. If they have negative self-talk, quite often their dancer or their athlete ends up with negative self-talk, and then that's quite hard for us to pull that back and try and try and drive that in a more positive like direction. Yeah, uh-huh. Like, how do we how do we make that a more positive thing for them? How do we like tell them that they're doing good and have them take it in rather than them being like, oh well, what's the angle here? Do you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:05

And I think another one that's quite good is like we were saying, like mirroring, like managing your own nerves because they will feed off of your energy. Yeah. If you're a bag of nerves and you're feeling like and uh you totally get that competitions, like sometimes parents first time seeing a routine, yeah, yeah. Maybe like it's been up levelled, maybe they were just doing a backhands thing, now they're doing a standing back talk. Yeah, parents probably thinking, Oh no, this is scary. Yeah, yeah. And I feel that way like when say like there's a cheer team on and we've just up leveled a stunt and it's like a last good life and we start. But if we manage that and you want to them to feed off of your energy, so if you're nervous and you're a bad, they're gonna feel the same way. Yeah, 100%. If you're like Kill Cam collect and then see one sit outside, be nervous, like shake, do all that.

SPEAKER_02 6:48

I feel like bringing that back to like just being a mum, like even if like Harris isn't a dancer, but like Harris is a very nervous wee boy, and that like it takes a lot for me. Like, I need to be like like doing all the things I do at dancing where I'm like getting down to his level and telling him it's normal to be nervous, but like also not letting him dictate that he doesn't do it because he's nervous. Do you know what I mean? Like knowing that it's a good thing I'm putting him into, like, even just for example, starting school was a real challenge for him. Um, but and I was nervous, like I was I was sitting up losing sleep at night. Do you know what I mean? I was the one that was like the thought of it was making me sick, but like I would never have shown that to him. Do you know what I mean? Because again, like he like Amy's life so he thinks like wow, like whatever my mum thinks is gospel.

SPEAKER_00 7:33

I think they wouldn't it's someone like you look up to as well. Because like I'm I'm thinking like something as simple as today, like I woke up and I felt all right and Ash was like, Is anyone nervous? And I was like, Oh, she's nervous, I'm nervous, I know she's nervous, I'm now nervous.

SPEAKER_01 7:44

I feel like um I probably should have just voiced that to Allen, but um you were still talking about being nervous in the group chat, and I was like, I feel this doesn't make me nervous. Parent phone calls make me nervous, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:56

But yeah, I totally agree. And do you know what? That's the lesson learnt today was that I should just keep it to my own. No, but then I feel like we could all be like, okay, great, we are normalizing.

SPEAKER_00 8:06

Yeah, I think it's just such a good way to look at it. Like if someone you look up to or someone you see is a role model, and if they're feeding something, you're like, right, okay, I um, now I'm feeling it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:17

I think that's a lesson that the seniors that have become coaches are learning as well quite a lot right now. That however they are in the practice room and however like they are going around and they're coaching and stuff like that, that's how their teams are. Yeah, they're they're directly mirroring them because they're massive role models for the kids. They think the sun shines out their butts, like they just think they're amazing and they want to be exactly like them because they're they're getting all these big trophies and they're just the big girls that are so good in their eyes. Um so I think that they are massively remote.

SPEAKER_00 8:44

Even looking for the senior, like the senior dance team I'm talking about specifically this year, the shift in their nerves and their attitude and their mindset, like being in the practice room with them at last comp I've just good. They're so calm. They're really good for it. They were so calm. They weren't like, yeah, they weren't putting any negative energies in each other, they were just like, and I think it was so good like for me to see. So I was like, that's amazing. It's so good for the younger kids. I think it was so easy to see with Ayla.

SPEAKER_01 9:08

Oh so lovely at that comp. So for anybody that wasn't there, Isla's a living, I think she's maybe just turning 12 in the summer. Yeah, and she stepped in for our senior team at the last comp. We had an injury. Senior team, 20-year-old. Yeah, I know. Crazy off. We're broken. Are we broken, gammy leg? Um so Isla stepped in and she was obviously nervous. It's a big thing to step into the senior level team when you are first year. They're like seven years older than you. Yeah, exactly. But she'd been chosen for it, she'd trained hard, she knew what she was doing, the work was done. She was just nervous, and the seniors were social with her. Like, they were so like, are you good? Have you got it? Do you need to go through anything? Like, don't overthink it. Yeah, listen however it goes. We're proud of you. Like, I could hear Eve really like bigging her up and stuff, and I was like, I'm so proud of them for like the way that they're handling themselves.

SPEAKER_00 9:58

When you think about it last season compared to the case, I told you I could make her cry.

SPEAKER_03 10:04

And they weren't doing it in like a panicked way. No, they were keeping hands around just chilling.

SPEAKER_00 10:09

And they're performing. When you see it on the stage, yeah. See the difference last year, you can see they believe they like they are so much more confident in themselves, and because they are managing all this so well, like some of them are they're young girls. Yeah, yeah, they are.

SPEAKER_01 10:23

But it's a much more enjoyable environment for them and for us as their, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:28

If they are like that, yeah. And they're saving training them what their what their tips are, what are they doing? And themselves they should like why how are you they should manage in that? I think it's massive.

SPEAKER_02 10:38

Yeah, I think it's so important, but I think we do a very good job at it, and it does, like you said, I feel like seeing the seniors do it. Yes, that we're like right, something's happening, like it's then having a little like what's the word. Yeah, yeah, um, and it's happening all throughout the school, which is really important to me. So yeah. Love that. I think we should end that one there. Um, thank you for your contribution. And thanks for coming here, even though you were nervous today. Not anytime I won't be back. Joking. Just wait till the next episode. We will leave it there and we will see you on the next episode of DDI Dance Dinings.

SPEAKER_00 11:19

Bye bye.