Calling, Grief and Purpose | B.Slade's Untold Story

B.Slade gets real about grief, calling, and breaking out of expectations.

From pastoring after his father’s death to reclaiming his purpose as a global artist, this episode dives into faith, identity, and what it really costs to follow God.

If you’ve ever felt stuck between who people expect you to be and who you’re called to become—this one’s for you.

Listen, share this with a friend who needs it, and be sure to subscribe and leave a review so more people can find the conversation. 

Transcript

Big Welcome For B Slade

SPEAKER_00 0:14

You guys, today's episode is going to be Super Cali Fag Fragilistic Espiala dosich that I cannot pronounce that word. It's gonna be that.

SPEAKER_01 0:29

It's gonna be that.

SPEAKER_00 0:33

It's gonna be I have the. Oh my goodness. So many Grammy nominations, Emmy nominations, Stellar Award winning, Dove winning, life artists, worked with Shaka Khan, Janet Jackson, Chris Brown, Ty Dallas. Um, I mean, it's just too many artists to name. So I'm just gonna say his name. Y'all make some noise for V slam.

SPEAKER_05 0:59

Oh, you said I'm gonna say his name. I was like, what's his name? No, no, no, no, but the princess.

SPEAKER_00 1:08

Because we're gonna say every chance we get.

SPEAKER_05 1:13

Every chance I get. I love calling his name.

SPEAKER_00 1:16

Belgame to the PK Pop.

SPEAKER_05 1:19

I'm so proud of you.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Thank you.

SPEAKER_05 1:21

I'm so proud of you.

SPEAKER_00 1:22

Thank you.

SPEAKER_05 1:23

Keep it going.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

Thank you for being here.

SPEAKER_05 1:24

I am glad to be here. I'm very excited. You caught me at the right time.

SPEAKER_00 1:28

Isn't that just like God to literally like order our steps to be in alignment? Because what you don't know is when I was planning season two, I was at my cousin's house, Dewan Cameron. I was in Lancaster with them. And I said literally. He was like, So Jazz, like, who do you want on the show this? I said, I actually really want to talk to B. Slate. He was like, Really? I said, yes. I said, I have not talked to him. I was like, I ain't seen him, I ain't hugged him, I ain't looked at him. I was like, I want to talk to B. Slate, and here I am. I get to talk to B. Slate.

Church Roots And Creative Freedom

SPEAKER_00 2:00

Wearing our deliverance denim. Wearing our deliverance denim. We didn't even plan this. It was kind of cool. I love this, but you're wearing plush boy and I'm not.

SPEAKER_05 2:09

This is plush boy. I gotta get you hooked up. Plushboyaparel.store. Three years now.

SPEAKER_00 2:13

Three years.

SPEAKER_05 2:14

Yeah, three years. I'm very, very proud of it.

SPEAKER_00 2:16

I am proud. Because had I known, I would have worn my plush boy.

SPEAKER_05 2:20

We're gonna make sure you're good.

SPEAKER_00 2:22

Thank you.

SPEAKER_05 2:22

Yeah, but I also do designs for companies as well. So if you know you want your stuff to turn into any of these things, just send over the logo and the idea or the custom name. You know, I do so we'll put PK Pod. There you go. And I I do it for companies all the time. I just um get my third company client. So I'm really I'm like, wow. And I learned how to do all this um just watching YouTube, really. Really? Yeah. Anything you want to learn how to do, that's YouTube University is where it's at.

SPEAKER_00 2:50

Yeah. I love that. But singing didn't come from YouTube University. No, absolutely not.

SPEAKER_05 2:54

No, that's not um from us, it's through us.

SPEAKER_00 2:56

It's through us, right?

SPEAKER_05 2:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:58

So we gotta educate the people. So y'all, I before we get into the nitty-gritty, um, be and my family, we go way back. Like AFCO. Like AFCO. Silver bilver. Y'all, my father's church, AFCO, literally Annalo Valley Christian Outreach. What a time, what an era, the 90s.

SPEAKER_05 3:24

Very ahead of its time. Ahead of its time. A lot of young people, a lot of young people, just excited about God. That was the most inspiring thing about AFCO was seeing that many young people on fire. And part of that interaction, you know, being young and trying to trying to remain saved in the mid-90s with so many new vices coming to us. Yeah, we were sheltered from so much, but yet at the same time, we knew a lot that our parents didn't know we knew.

SPEAKER_01 3:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 3:53

So at that church, it seemed like it was just cool to see other young people my age on fire for God, full of the Holy Ghost, super creative, super innovative, controversial always. We was super controversial, flipping songs way before like Sunday service or the sunny part, like the samples choir. I mean, no, I love them, but y'all was doing this stuff.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

There was Cliff Edwards.

SPEAKER_05 4:20

Yeah, I promise you, and and Brent Jones and T P Mom. I don't think they get enough love. I think at all.

SPEAKER_00 4:26

Also, my dad had come, wasn't it? Yep.

SPEAKER_05 4:28

He would have the ones that, you know, because we were, I was apostolic, but I was pretty radical. You know what I mean? Like I just, I didn't wasn't trying to be, I was just being myself. And your dad allowed me to express he saw me at one of the um conventions at PAW, and I had my Insonic TS10 keyboard, and and I performed, ironically, trust theory from out the box. But it was be it was years before it came out on that record. Okay. And um it was an innovative time in church, but not innovative enough to have a young kid from San Diego with a keyboard plug in the stereo chords and play the beats. I was making at a at a convention.

SPEAKER_01 5:12

At a PAW convention.

SPEAKER_05 5:13

At a PAW convention, and then be like, and just don't care. And then your dad was the first one up, like, yeah, I can't say what he said. You know, if you know, you know. And he was so amped just to see somebody have the audacity to be themselves boldly apostolic, anointed, and creative for God. And he supported me from that time and had me come in from that time on. It was like, that was it.

SPEAKER_00 5:38

And he's still like that to this day.

SPEAKER_05 5:40

Yeah, he supports the the ones that the black sheeps, the underdogs, the outcasts. That's who God called him to from the beginning. He's one.

SPEAKER_03 5:48

Yep.

SPEAKER_05 5:49

Um, because he's too real for people. That's all it is. Yeah, y'all's Hall of Family is just too real.

SPEAKER_00 5:55

Period. Interview over. That's what the problem is. The doors of the church is now open. If you would like to be saved, is the one, you know? No, but for real, like genuinely, yeah. It all started with that. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_05 6:10

And I'm so grateful that he some of my first professional gospel bookings.

SPEAKER_00 6:16

Yeah. Like, I remember him being like, We're gonna have you come, and I had your lanyard, and I had the out the I was like, oh my god. This is one of the first like gospel artists that I can play cover to cover and literally press play.

SPEAKER_05 6:32

Press play, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:33

No skip albums.

SPEAKER_05 6:35

I'm so glad to hear that. Because really, that's what I try to make. I didn't mean to overspeak you, I'm sorry. But I do try to make albums I wish I could buy. Instead of complaining about what's not out there, I just make what I wish I could buy. And so I find there's about a thousand other people that might like what I like.

SPEAKER_01 6:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 6:52

And I used to have to take like gospel compilation CDs or full albums of different urban artists, but not all of the songs would have the kind of production level that I was looking for as a producer. So I would take the most edgy urban productions off of each one of these CDs and then make my own compilations, and then I was like, I'm getting tired of this. Like, I need to, I need to have an album where all of these components broken down in sections are on one piece.

SPEAKER_06 7:16

That's good.

SPEAKER_05 7:17

And so instead of complaining, if there's something you don't like in the industry, you guys, or you don't like in ministry, or you don't like in, you know, instead of talking about what isn't there, just go make what it should be. You can show people better than you could tell

Making The Music You Needed

SPEAKER_05 7:30

them.

SPEAKER_00 7:30

Hello. Hello, hi.

SPEAKER_05 7:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:33

So many people know you as a PK or may not, but we know that that means different things for different people. You know, the church of God in Christ says you can't just join and you gotta be born in.

SPEAKER_05 7:45

I heard that song. It's a very highly tuned.

SPEAKER_00 7:49

Isn't it a great song? Like, who wrote that? Um, but what is your PK journey like? Were you joined? Were you born into this thing?

SPEAKER_05 7:59

No, I think I think people think I was, but I wasn't now. Um, my dad didn't get called to the ministry till like later. Like, so we served at uh Apostolic Faith Temple in San Diego. My great grandfather helped build that church, so we just celebrated our hundred-year anniversary last year. Really?

SPEAKER_00 8:15

So that's kind of cool. That's amazing.

SPEAKER_05 8:17

So they had that legacy um in San Diego on the PAW. But um my parents didn't become pastors until I was like 17, 17 or 18, right around the Silent X album.

SPEAKER_00 8:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 8:32

And um Yeah, I I'm glad because I've watched, you know, people grow up, different PKs that I knew, you know, go through so much scrutiny. And she was the pastor's daughter, and you know, that is my my first uh love. And I was very protective of her because I just saw how cruel they were to her. I didn't experience that until like maybe 19 or 20 after my parents had been pastoring, maybe a little bit over a year, that the the microscope thing started happening to me. But before then, I just did things the way I wanted to do them. I wasn't trying to be rebellious, I just I didn't think any of that applied to me. And my parents didn't make me become a preacher, my parents didn't make me sing.

SPEAKER_01 9:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 9:25

It was all choices that they saw something in me, and if they saw a spark, they fann the flames. Yeah. So I I was I was very supported in that way, and they didn't put any specific uh stipulations on me initially. But then as the church began to grow, as you know, then it's like the image has to be a certain way. And as radical as we were, to some, yeah, to us, it was just normal. We would just keep like you would they call us the radical church because we're just keeping it a buck. We shout, we go in, we're do what we do. Yeah, we're authentic about what we do. And then there was a point in time where I was just like, okay, this is their vision, but it's not what I want to do. I didn't grow up, I didn't grow up to say I'm gonna be a preacher or pastor of church someday. That was never my desire. My desire was to be an international Japanese rock star. Yeah, baptizing people in oceans and hotel swimming pools, and I've done it. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like I'm, you know, can you imagine that? People going down water slides at an amusement park, but um, they're going down that water slide, and I'm yeah, yeah. That's the kind of guy I am and always have been, but I never had a desire to be a pastor in that in that way, and they never pressured me to do that. They saw how radical I was, they fought for me in different meetings. Trust me, those board meetings with those different bishops, and they were in there all the time about me because but the one thing they couldn't deny was that I was never compromising Acts 238. I was never compromising my my reality of who God is as Jesus.

SPEAKER_00 11:06

And the anointing.

SPEAKER_05 11:08

And the anointing. It was undeniable, but that's one part of the pressure that people think because your parents, that's the family business or that's the family ministry that you're somehow obligated to just. I didn't want any of that. It kind of fell in my lap after my dad died.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 11:25

I didn't want to be a pastor, I wanted to tour. I out the box was like number one, you know. It was it was number, I was just about to like really go there and tour and go off on it, you know, and I had to give all that up because suddenly, here you go, son, a brand new church. And they don't want you, they want your dad, but I'm not the ghost of my father, so I don't know what to tell you. This is Joshua over here. That's Moses. That was hard.

SPEAKER_06 11:54

Yeah, I didn't want that. Hello, everyone. I did not want to pastor.

SPEAKER_05 12:01

But he should know I shouldn't know anything better. I didn't want it to begin with. I did what I had to do to make sure my mom was good. Because if I didn't continue, then how was her mortgage gonna get paid? And then how is the church mortgage gonna get paid? And I'm not getting paid because I'm not touring, because I have to take care of her.

SPEAKER_03 12:35

So it was just then who wants that?

Becoming A PK Under A Microscope

SPEAKER_03 12:42

Who wants that? Who asks for that?

SPEAKER_05 12:48

So the good part is I was able to finally grieve my dad last year in October. He passed in 04, and um I just didn't have time to unpack that part. So guess what? I put it in a drawer like it didn't happen. Wow. So um, but I was able to deal with it in uh October. And I mean, what happened was someone sent me an old clip from home church, Apostolic Faith Temple, in um in San Diego, and it was my dad was on there, he was playing the organ behind Pastor Taylor. And um just hearing my dad's voice again. I had you know, after your parents pass, sometimes you you start after a while you start forgetting how their voice sounds.

SPEAKER_03 13:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 13:41

So I heard his voice and I finally got the breakthrough and closure I needed just to like finally grieve because when he died, there was no time to cry. I had to turn into some cosplay pastor. I didn't ask to be. So I'm grateful I'm able to still be preserved because at least I didn't have to work and tour during that time. So I was able to spare my voice and my my physicality, my mental because some people were working that entire time.

SPEAKER_03 14:10

And so thanks, thanks be unto God that you know I was able to not turn my back on God because of some things that his children do.

SPEAKER_05 14:28

And I had to really quit trying to blanket things on God that he had nothing to do with, it's just human nature. You know, no one's to blame, you know. But I the biggest part is knowing that I still have to love. They still have a soul, and the same way they make mistakes, I make mistakes too. So I try to have that grace about it. But I I would never recommend anyone uh taking on being a pastor unless it's something you are truly called to do. Because it is not a vocation, it is not some career move. When you wear that band around your neck, it means you'll lose your head for what you believe is not a costume.

SPEAKER_00 15:13

And what's crazy about that is that nowadays it's so many people that are wanting that title without being called and not knowing the cost that comes with that. Like they're just deciding, I want to be a pastor because I don't like my church and what my pastor is saying. So I'm I could do it better than they can. And it's like, did God call you to this? Do you understand what it costs to carry this type of mantle? Like, it is not for the faint.

SPEAKER_05 15:47

No, it's not, it's not, and you're supposed to knock it out of the park as a pastor or as a preacher 52 times a year. Every week, you're supposed to serve this new meal, which is the same meal prepared in a new way every week. And you better nail it. You better get 10 for 10, you better get 52 out of 52. You better not be tired. You better not be going through any personal things. Your family better not be going through any personal things.

SPEAKER_06 16:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 16:18

And then the family's held to a different set of standards somehow because their dad's the mayor, their dad's the pastor, their mom's the first, you know. So it's like, oh, we're gonna, we're gonna really sock it to the kids because we're gonna deflect our own shortcomings by attacking the obvious candidate. And that's who, unless you're called to do it, it's something that is not mentally good for me. Thank God I I I really do have the spirit of God in me because it's it's a piece that really does pass all understanding. I don't know how, except it's by his grace. It's by his grace.

SPEAKER_03 16:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 17:01

You know, sometimes, some days nothing bothers me. You know, I'm fine. And then some days a little tiny dart from some little comment that somebody will say, and it's tiny, it's not even like a nuke. They didn't even nuke me. It's just a little tiny dart. But that day it caught me off guard and it could take me out for a week. So imagine going through that while your your your mom's dying. You're preaching, and then coming back home to wash and bathe and shave her head and tell her she's still beautiful and though she's crying. That smell that that humiliation for your parent not liking that they have to be taken care of, but then I still gotta go back and preach. I still gotta make sure that offerings raise, which I hate raising offerings because I'm not that $20 line over here, $50 line over here. I couldn't stand, I never liked that stuff. I never was down with that. I was like, give if if if you feeling funny about your money, boo, keep it. God loves a cheerful giver. I know. If you feeling funny about your money, just keep it, bruh. It's good. I don't like that. So there were so many things I had to do that I didn't want to do, but had to do, which it, but it never registered in my spirit. It never felt right, but I just did what I felt obligated to do and what was expected of my family, expected of the congregation, and expected of my city.

SPEAKER_04 18:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 18:34

And every week a little bit of this rock star, a little bit of this power profit was diminishing to satisfy the needs of insatiable people. And I love them. But they were never satisfied. I see why Moses was like, forget it. So that's why I'm not one. Yeah. I speak when I'm spoken to. When God opens the door for me to preach, speak, prophesy, I do so.

SPEAKER_00 19:04

When did you know, like, okay, I can't continue carrying this load of

Grief And The Hidden Cost Of Pastoring

SPEAKER_00 19:10

this ministry and not like this isn't for me?

SPEAKER_05 19:12

Um, probably right after my mom passed, and I saw BET Awards and there was a a tribute to Prince. And I felt like I was supposed to be doing that some part of that tribute.

SPEAKER_01 19:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 19:30

And I was like, I'm up here in this pulpit, and I talked to the congregation. I was like, yo, how many of you guys watched that tribute to Prince last night? They were like, hands was up. I was like, how many of y'all felt like I was supposed to be there? Hands all went up. I said, so why can't I be there? I feel like that's where I feel like I'm called to the world to be a global ambassador for God and creativity and anointing. Not that the main church doesn't need to be edified to continue in their walk.

SPEAKER_04 20:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 20:03

Because people always talk about outreach, but what about the cats that's been in this a long time? We're bored to death. Can you give us some direction here? Because it's kind of like giving hamster wheel.

SPEAKER_01 20:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 20:15

You know, and I said, I'm supposed to be up there and I can't do it in San Diego. I have to move to LA. It's like you could be the best fireman. But if the fire is two hours away, they're not gonna wait two hours for you to get the fire truck up there. The house will be burnt down. So I was like, man, I gotta move up there. I don't know nobody up there. This is a faith move.

SPEAKER_04 20:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 20:35

And I told the congregation that you got six months. One of our the churches that came out of the ministry had another church. They would come in and speak for me. Um Pastor uh Cedric Baltrip, he was also a road manager, but he stopped being road manager so he could pastor. So I was like, okay, cool. Okay. I remember the day he told me he was, but he was called to do it. Okay. This is like we're back to the beginning. Yeah. He even then knew when the calling went. And it when I tell you things lined up to make it happen to be so, you see. So when it's right, it's right. When it's really from God, favor hits and doors open and people will come. I didn't want this sheep to just scatter just like you don't uh bleed on sheep because if you complain about what's being done to you, then that blood gets on their wool, and then here comes the wolves.

SPEAKER_06 21:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 21:33

So I said, you guys, prepare yourselves. You can either go with Pastor said or whoever else that you deem fit. I didn't just say bye. There was a a segue. Yeah. There was there's a way to do things because I couldn't handle um two mortgages and no touring.

SPEAKER_00 21:53

That's a lot.

SPEAKER_05 21:53

And cars. I had a couple of cars repossessed during that time because I just I I didn't take a side.

SPEAKER_00 22:00

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 22:02

We couldn't afford the salary. Some of y'all know. Some PKs have to do things and there's absolutely no salary. No pay. My parents didn't take my dad taught while he pastored. So it wasn't like he was dependent on the church for money. He had a job. He was an educator for 40 years.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 22:21

So I didn't grow up with that kind of pressure either. Thank God. It was good to see that my dad had earned his own keep outside of his calling.

SPEAKER_00 22:29

That's a blessing. Wow. Okay. So many things I want to ask. I'm good. We got time. Okay. So

Leaving The Pulpit For Purpose

SPEAKER_00 22:40

we have to talk about. Obviously, you're a person of faith, like duh. Um, but how has your faith evolved throughout the years? Like different seasons, right? You pastoring that season, you going after what you know you're called to do. How has your faith continued to evolve with you?

SPEAKER_05 22:59

I moved from God only being my dad to him being an older brother. That was kind of cool. Okay. I didn't know him and you know, he's closer than our sister, our brother. I mean, you see, you sing these things, you say these things, you testify these things, but you don't really experience them. So I only knew him as like a covering, a dad, a provider. And it's true, when your parents pass away or your parents uh forsake you or abandon you, then the Lord He will elevate you and take you up. Yeah. Like your anointing levels, your discernment levels, um, your insight levels, when your parents pass away, He has to provide for you in new ways. Because he talks with them before they feel released to leave the kid here. But he God shows them something that somehow they will be your child will be taken care of, and the parents will be comforted in knowing that. He moved from dad to brother. There's things you can talk to your brother or older sister about or your siblings about that you can't talk to your parents about. Like you could never you understand.

SPEAKER_02 24:13

We are not discussing this.

SPEAKER_00 24:17

No, no, never say that to my parents. Yes. As open-minded as I know they are.

SPEAKER_05 24:23

Yeah, there's just certain things, nah. So, in that same way, it's certain things I wouldn't open up to God about because I'm like, this is my heavenly father. I don't want to be disrespectful. And he's like, bro, chill. He started, you know, I sang a song Personal Jesus, but it really kicked in right around pandemic time, is when it shifted from him being only like Abba, father, dad, to big brother, homie, talk to you where you at, talk to him about anything. He makes you make the decision. You don't come to him telling him wrench you of anything. You go wash your own face and anoint your own head. He's on that wave. I didn't know that cider characteristic of God because he was only marketed to me as dad covering provider, which he is, but he has so many, so many more dimensions.

SPEAKER_03 25:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 25:07

So that's how my faith evolved is like me having to unlearn his only characteristic that I was willing to accept. Not that anyone taught me wrong. Yeah. It's just that every 10 years you're absolutes. Um they evolve. These things that you say you never do or never say or never understand, suddenly you're like, uh, actually, I wasn't right about that.

SPEAKER_01 25:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 25:31

If not in whole, in part, I need to rethink that. Or you judging somebody else's kid about something, and then your kid starts doing it. And now suddenly you want everyone to have mercy and compassion and be understanding, but you was dogging everybody else's kid when they was going through it. So that's how your faith evolves. God will have things happen in your life to challenge the very words you judge somebody else with. Just to see, oh, so this is how it should be done. It's so easy when you're on the outside and on the sidelines looking at somebody else's situation. You're like, they need to do this and they need to do that, and then it hits your house.

SPEAKER_01 26:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 26:04

Then it switches. Sometimes that's the only way we can learn compassion and empathy. Sympathy is like, man, I wonder what that feels like. Empathy is, I know exactly where he's coming from. But faith evolves as your intelligence grows. Reading the word is not enough, which is why just reciting it and saying you could remember it, that's great. Great, you get a bonus biblical biscuit. Fine, there's your reward. You remembered it. But did you meditate on it? Yeah. We read it, but you gotta say la, pause, meditate on it. Why? Because you gotta get this thing in your system. It's fighting through several flesh layers of algorithms that are like, no, no, no, abort. Yes, do not speak to the spirit. Yeah, you're so sleepy. That's funny. I wasn't sleepy when I was just scrolling a few minutes ago. Right. Ironically, I wasn't sleepy when I wanted to look at what I wanted to look at a few minutes ago.

SPEAKER_06 27:01

Hello.

SPEAKER_05 27:01

But now when it comes down to things of meditation and purpose and promise, now all of a sudden I'm just it's so taxing. And it's, you know. Yeah. So I've grown in that area too. Meditation, adding that part. Um, being cognizant of God all day. He knows that we have things to do. He's busy too. You're not the only one busy, bruh. God's busy too. You know, he's keeping people under the earth, on the earth in Australia. You know, not falling off. So he's busy too. However, he does like when we come to him. Yeah. And I didn't, I was the kind of person I didn't want to bother God. I feel like I'll try to figure out as many things as I can figure out on my own without having to pray to him about everything. Because I feel like that'd be a I that would be me being a weak saint. I don't know why I I made that up. That was self-imposed. There wasn't even an enemy. That was just self-imposed. That was just self-imposed. Yeah. And as I grew and see that God wants good things to happen to me, even in my worst and lowest estate, he paid for decisions I haven't even made yet. My newest idea is in syndication to him. So knowing that, all the good and the bad, he's not looking at me trying to punish me. I did not come to condemn the world. We're already condemned just because we were born. We were born in sin and shaping and iniquity. So he don't have to come here to remind us of the separation of sin and Adam's fall. He's cognizant of that. He's more interested in you coming to him about everything.

SPEAKER_04 28:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 28:28

The things you even think are not interesting, you'd be surprised at how God would love to hear your observations about grass or a flower or the sun. You'd be surprised at how much he takes joy in just hearing like what you think about things in a conversational way, not a dear God, in the name of Jesus, I thank you for this amazing plethora that you have set before our He's like, What is that? Where'd you learn that from? I don't even who told you to pray to me like that? Just chill. You can be reverent and and not disrespectful and still be you're supposed to come to him boldly. We're not supposed to be timid and all come to him boldly. Like this is our dad. Yeah, this is my bro. Yeah and I didn't get a lot of that while I was trying to satisfy Saints' aesthetic needs and prove my spiritual aptitude to people who were intentionally misunderstanding me. And then blaming God for that decision.

SPEAKER_06 29:29

Yeah, that's not if he's like now now where how'd I get in this? This people are led away by their own lust. Yeah. That's true.

Faith That Gets More Personal

SPEAKER_03 29:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:42

I love that. Okay, so we have to talk about the hundreds of songs, the music. You are a the most singingist. I was about to say the most singingist. Beep. I didn't want to beep beep between my own show. The most singingist human being. Most talented human being. Thank you. Um like, oh my lady gaga, you just are so freaking talented. And I have talked to several PKs on this show, and all the people from the PJ Mortons to the people, and I we bring up your music every time, and you are in a league by yourself.

SPEAKER_05 30:28

Well, I love PJ Morton because I was just on a ride where his music was playing at Disneyland.

SPEAKER_00 30:33

Yes.

SPEAKER_05 30:34

So shout out to him. Like this, it gives me hope as a producer. I'm a big Disney head and I wanted to have my music on attraction. So to know that it's possible from someone that I I don't I don't know him. We're not like super close, but he's someone I truly admire.

SPEAKER_00 30:48

I love that. Yes, we we talk, we talk about, I'm telling you, your name is brought your name is brought up on several of my episodes because so many people understand the greatness of the gift that you are. And I would be remiss not to talk about the music. And I was on the way over here, I was trying to think like, okay, Jasmine, of all of the songs, like what was your favorite song? And I was really struggling because again, for me, your music was no skips. So I was like, okay, well, maybe albums, like, okay, out the box was my album. But I was like, well, no, no, no, no, no. Well, wait, because if I really think about it, the pronounced Tone album got so many.

SPEAKER_05 31:31

No, that's my out of all of my catalog, out of B Slade and Tony catalog catalog, out of all of the catalog, out of every song I've ever written for anyone else, PTN is my favorite album. Okay, so I'm not crazy. No, I know that the box was the bigger.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

That's what people, but I don't think people understand how many gems is on this. Like, I literally was like, yo, when I was I was driving and I was up here, I was like, I'm just like so many gems. Like you referenced Personal Jesus earlier, but I don't think people realize like you told your story so artistically, like, and and you wasn't just giving us EPs of like, here's eight to nine, it'll be like 18, 19, 20 plus songs of just like yo, hit after hits. Yeah. Okay, so I was gonna ask you, what was your favorite so far of the catalog? So you agree with that.

SPEAKER_05 32:30

There's no other album that will outdo that album for me because it was the moment I realized I knew what I was doing. Before then, I was trying to find my way. Okay. On that album, I knew what I was doing. When I heard it back, I recorded as I played first. And um, when I heard those first, ooh, ooh, when I first heard those back in the studio, I was like, I finally sound good.

SPEAKER_00 32:57

Wow.

SPEAKER_05 32:58

Because I was trying to be as good as like Dawkins and Dawkins or Commission or Fred Hammond or you know, Donald Lawrence mixing wise, I'm talking about. Okay. Their mixes were just incredible. So I was like, pronounced Toney felt as if okay, I sound as good as them. Or yeah, that was that was goals. They were goals for me. They they still are very much so people I admire and look up to, and and they're in the DNA of who I become. So if there's some parts of me you don't like blaming on Fred Hammond and Commission or somebody.

SPEAKER_00 33:33

I love that. I absolutely love that. For someone who has not like experienced your music, where would you tell them to start?

SPEAKER_05 33:44

Spare me, this new single that just dropped. It's not really a single, it's just the first offering from the rock album.

SPEAKER_00 33:49

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 33:49

Um, it's a gospel rock trap album.

SPEAKER_00 33:53

I love it.

SPEAKER_05 33:54

Yeah, it's called B. It's just lowercase B. Okay. And it's just like where people see me be like, you know, apostolic astronaut. Yeah, you know, rock star vibes, but it's really, really heavy. And it's it talks about the first verse says, uh, you see me crying like a newborn child, but what do you do? Just slap me in my face. Trying to what's it say? Trying to make something of my life. But what do you do? Just call me a disgrace. Too much praise and adoration tells me people saying they're with me means they ain't. 24-inch bust down wearing funky clothes don't make me any less of a saint. Spare me. Here you come, but your malicious lies. Spare me, telling me you got my back, but you just got through trying to stab me there. Kiss me, Judas. Thoughts and prayers. Uh. Acting like you care. Uh the fake smiles and hugs. You didn't know I've been in sackcloth and ashes, face down on the rug. Is there any way for me to escape the grip of your self-righteous judgmental hands? Just because I don't look how you think I should look, don't make me any less of a man. People always gonna criticize me. They'll do it while I live and when I die. A hundred years from now, lest I outlast it. He looked so peaceful, but who picked out that tie? Spare me. Here you come, with your malicious lies, telling me you got my back, but you just got through trying to stab me there. Kiss me, Judas. Thoughts and prayers, acting like you care. The fake smiles and hugs you didn't know. I've been in sackcloth and ashes, consecrating. Face down on the rug. You don't know me like that, sis, bruh. Don't judge a book by the cover. Spare me. Now that you dig it, you on board, you on the you're gonna hop on the moving train now that it works. Spare me.

SPEAKER_00 35:51

I'm good. Wow. Okay. Yeah. I gotta listen to that when I leave. It's bad.

SPEAKER_05 35:57

So on the way over here, I shot part of the music video in the car. And um, the driver went absolutely crazy over it. And it several doors opened just from that. Yeah. So I just feel like if people want to know where I'm at, I wrote the song in 1997.

SPEAKER_00 36:15

Really?

SPEAKER_05 36:15

During the PTN sessions. It was supposed to be on PTN. And um, I just reactivated them hypnobells, and everybody like, wow, what's this new stuff? It's actually, you know, reimagined. It's it's almost, you know, 30 years old.

SPEAKER_00 36:31

It's crazy.

SPEAKER_05 36:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:32

Okay, I'm excited to hear it.

SPEAKER_05 36:34

But it's but it's not, it's brand new.

SPEAKER_00 36:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 36:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 36:37

Yeah. The way I did it then was who I was then, and it was good for what it was then. But now those lyrics mean a little bit more to me after I've lived a little. When I first wrote it, I still had grandparents and parents and a church, and you know what I mean? So the stakes weren't as high. But when both parental parachutes are deployed, the stakes are way higher. Trust me. Yeah. Your you your calling and election has to be sure spiritually and career-wise.

SPEAKER_00 37:03

I love that. Okay.

Favorite Albums And The New Rock Era

SPEAKER_00 37:05

So we recently just lost another creative musical genius, um, the late Richard Smallwood. And I know that you, being the artist that you are, have been inspired by so many different people. Do you have like a story that he inspired you by, or like, did his music ever influence any part of your life?

SPEAKER_05 37:38

Yeah, I have two short, I'll try to make them short. I don't mean to be verbose, but I don't get a chance to talk much. So thank you for letting me speak. The first happened when I was nine, and a director who was a tenor who I didn't know was a director by the name of the name of Maurice Barbour. Okay, he introduced the song called Psalm 8 from the original um version, not the remake version of Psalm 8. And he taught it to the pastor's choir, who was directed by Brenda Wynn, another one of my musical sense. And when I heard Psalm 8, oh Lord, our Lord, how excellent is thy name. I didn't know that you could take classical pieces or Mozart sounding uh orchestrations and arrangements and have a choir sing it. It blew my mind. It opened me up in a way like, oh, you can do that. It was something so beautiful. I had never heard black choirs sing. And that was the beginning of my Richard Smallwood journey. And then fast forward to when I'm finally have my own deal and I'm, you know, I'm out there and everything. The second album happens, a song called The Beautiful Place from 02. It's one of the last songs on the album. We were about to record a song together, Richard Smallwood and I. And for some reason, they weren't ready for us to record yet. So we hopped in this Hummer. And I didn't even know he would get in a Hummer, but yeah, he was, yeah. Richard actually was actually kind of gangster. A lot of people don't know. Like he didn't take no mess, that's for sure. Uh, but he got in the Hummer and we listened to the album, and he said, you know, I have to tell you that the beautiful place is my favorite song of yours. And it was the one that was most inspired by him. So for him to hear himself in that song and for him to tell me that is a very special, special, special memory to know that my musical sensei thought the beautiful place, which was inspired by his anointing and creative classical ingenuity forward thinking to s to deal with not just a musician, but an anthemic poet. It's anthemic, like it's he's the modern him.

SPEAKER_03 40:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 40:08

Yeah. So I love that. He stuck up for me. He followed me, he liked all my eccentricities, he encouraged me to be myself. He dim DM'd me several times about he's very proud of me being myself. So I have those those times.

SPEAKER_00 40:27

What's uh song of his that's your favorite?

SPEAKER_05 40:29

I will say Psalm 8, and um there's another one. His mercy endure forever.

SPEAKER_02 40:37

When they start looping that part, and then I'll be like, It's done, nurse.

SPEAKER_05 40:46

He's ready.

SPEAKER_00 40:47

Like, if we don't, if you don't like release a war cry at that moment, like are you really listening to the song?

SPEAKER_05 40:53

Because like when it loops, because it takes a while for it to get in your spirit and the chords that accompany it, if the choir keeps singing it over and over again, it just I literally go in like the anointing on that. So I know everyone loves total praise, and I do too. And I sing it and I go in and it does something to me as well. Psalm eight, you know. But that is mercy and do it. I don't know if that's the actual title, but that's the vamp. That's the song. That thing wears my spirit out. I love this. I'm like, can I just I'm just making some pop tarts? Let me just pop out first. Alexa, stop playing this song so I can enjoy my breakfast.

SPEAKER_00 41:36

I love that. Okay,

Richard Smallwood Memories And Influence

SPEAKER_00 41:38

so I like to I like to play a game with all of my guests on the show. Like let's do it. Let's very fun, very whatever. Yeah. Because you're an artist, I'm going to play a music game with you. Okay. Because I know you have so many songs in your just chambers. So I'm going to give you a word and you tell me the song that comes to mind with the word. Okay. Okay. It can be whatever.

SPEAKER_05 42:01

Okay, I like this. I like this.

SPEAKER_00 42:05

I'ma say the word love.

SPEAKER_05 42:08

Um, what's that guy? That Kirk Franklin guy. Love, I love the comms and comes. You know that song he made up a while ago, that guy. I like that.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

It is.

SPEAKER_00 42:33

We love the 90s. 90s is just it's words ass.

SPEAKER_05 42:37

All right, we're gonna be okay. Um they all dressing up for us Halloween. Legitimately. Yeah, and then gonna try to tell us how to do it. We made it up, sis. What you have we met?

SPEAKER_02 42:52

Ronaldo! Hello.

SPEAKER_00 42:53

All right, okay um, okay, my next word is Wait, is it supposed to be wait, is it supposed to be a song of mine?

SPEAKER_05 43:02

Or anyway, every song. It's okay. Okay, okay. No, I'm not gonna put you in the box. Okay, good. I see what you did then.

SPEAKER_00 43:07

I'm gonna put you in the box. All right. The next word is Jesus.

SPEAKER_02 43:13

Oh something about the name Jesus. Something about the name Jesus. It is the sweet name, Jesus. Oh, the name Jesus It is the sweet.

SPEAKER_00 43:57

Game over.

SPEAKER_05 43:58

I love that song.

SPEAKER_00 44:00

Name over. Oh my goodness. Then that why is Rant Allen's voice another another one of one?

SPEAKER_05 44:09

Like it's just uh My dad used to play his music because of the high notes he would hit like full, like he'd be going. And just one of the most unbelievable male vocalists of our time. Of our time. I just don't feel like he got enough grapes. You know, I think people thought, oh, he's so funny and cute and amazing. And yeah, okay, all right, great. Yes, he has great hair and a wonderful smile. But this brother can, they don't make him like that. Don't at all. Ryan Sallon's a whole different type of puma beast. He literally is one of one. Yeah. Like unbelievable vocals to be and for as long as he sang in that range, which is pretty incredible too. And his personality. He was very um approachable.

SPEAKER_04 45:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 45:02

Real laid back. Actually, kind of shy. It was weird because like he he he turns on on when he's time when it's time to administer or you know, do whatever he's gonna do. But offstage, he was I was surprised he was very reserved, kind of shy.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

Very humble, very to his side.

SPEAKER_05 45:19

Like Karen Clark, super shy.

SPEAKER_00 45:21

Like just very timid. You wouldn't expect you wouldn't expect it.

SPEAKER_05 45:24

And then when that anointing kicks in, and you'd be like, hello. You know, I'm I'm more on the demure side, you know, except when I'm cutting up, but for the most part, it's not until, you know, once I feel the energy of the people, the band, and then God's dropping down from the top, they're right here, they're here. And when all of those things converge, yeah, that's when we all go up.

SPEAKER_01 45:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 45:47

I think it's important to include the people. That's why congregational songs are also important. Is like services shouldn't only be held hostage by people who are talented to really, really, really sing. I feel like everyone should sing. Some obviously don't sing as good as others, but there's something about the community bond of you know, hymns and congregational songs. Yeah. That we that we we need. That's just a sidebar. I know that's not part of the game.

SPEAKER_00 46:17

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_05 46:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 46:19

Game over. Like one and done. Because it's like what comes after Jesus? Like nothing. Like nothing. Nothing. So yeah, good job. You did it. You did it. You get a star, you get a star.

Music Game And Worship Culture

SPEAKER_00 46:37

You get a ministry, you get a ministry, literally. Okay, so I could talk to you all day, but clearly, we have to wrap soon. But I want to ask you, like, what are you currently, like, what are you, what is B Slate working on currently? What can we be expecting and looking forward to?

SPEAKER_05 46:54

Uh a lot of preaching. A lot of preaching.

SPEAKER_01 47:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 47:00

I see myself preaching in odd places. Okay. You know, like some of the best content that's online, it's not footage that's filmed in a studio. Like when they take things out on location, I would like to speak in like dope locations. Yeah. Like take it outside of the four walls, you know, beaches, parks, amusement parks, you know, just like where you just break bread in odd areas. Um, the other thing is just a lot of rock star performances in every genre, mainly rock is where it's at right now. And just catching people's attention long enough to direct them and lead them to the rock that's higher than I. That's the ultimate goal. You know what I'm saying? It's like if they're if they're seeing something on me that means, well, what's that? Or makes them stop and pay attention. Once I get their attention, what do I need to say? Oh, I'm dope or I'm fly. No, Jesus is the best thing that's ever happened to me. You know, uh, movies, a lot of movies, and my own podcast. Maybe you can be a guest on it. Yes, I would love to. Yeah, in the coming months, a book is in the near future. Um, Japan residency coming soon. I'll be in London in June. I'll be in Vegas in March. I love this. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:09

You have a very busy year ahead, but it's literally still like you're in your prime. And I'm I'm super excited about it because I think that a lot of people don't understand the journey. And you've been intentional about forging your path, holding true to your purpose and not allowing anybody to box you in otherwise. And so I already know you're about to just continue to turn heads. Oh, yes, and continue to excel beyond the norms. And um, you have a global anointing.

SPEAKER_05 48:49

It's on me and in me to be seen now.

SPEAKER_00 48:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 48:53

Thank you for seeing that call. It's always been there, yeah, but not like me accepting it. It's one thing. We all know we have something on our lives, yeah, but it's a whole other thing to actually accept it and to walk it out. How many more prophecies do we need to affirm what we already know? Come on. Because prophecies aren't for some new revelation, it's affirming what God has already told us. Yeah. So um I just see myself being uh a catalyst for unique anointings, creative artists, um, dance. I really I see myself really dancing a lot more. Yeah. Um showing people more instrument playing, like bringing bringing more of that part out.

SPEAKER_01 49:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 49:42

So these are these are goals of mine. Um so yeah, I'm I'm I'm very, very excited. Continue working with the people I'm working with. Um, hopefully some more tours with Janet. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 49:54

And um yeah, that's that's if you can have one dream collaboration that like obviously somebody you haven't worked with, who would it be?

SPEAKER_05 50:03

Janelle Monet.

SPEAKER_00 50:05

Oh, I can see that.

SPEAKER_05 50:06

Yeah, Janelle Monet is somebody I feel like I need to work with.

SPEAKER_00 50:09

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 50:10

Yeah. I think Docey, I need to work with Docey. I s I also feel like I need to work on a Ralph Tresvan album, like as a producer. So if he ever decides to do another solo album, you know what I'm saying? I'm the guy here you are. I would love to do it because I think he's just a really, really talented studio and live performer. He's one of the few that still like gives his all in the studio and on stage. Like, I don't know. He's got that pizzazz, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 50:42

Yeah. Last question, I just thought about this. Would you be open to like a 90s, early 2000s greatest hits, like reunion type of concert? Tour, concert tours, yeah. Like with like the Dawkins and Dawkins, and you know what I mean? Like just it what do you think about that?

SPEAKER_05 51:00

I'm I'm completely open to that. Um, it would have to be a band that we all as a community feel is worthy of that kind of uh responsibility.

SPEAKER_00 51:10

Because that's a lot.

SPEAKER_05 51:11

Because my stuff is pretty intricate. Dietrich's stuff is pretty intricate. Yeah, Dawkins and Dawkins for sure, like the focus album. If we were to do something like that, the band would have to be I don't want to say yeah, you know what I'm saying, like and and and fans of the catalog to know how to approach these things. So if we all had this the right community MD, it's something that I would not be opposed to. Um, I'm gonna be me though. Yeah. So as long as

What’s Next And A Return To Altar Calls

SPEAKER_05 51:38

all the parties involved understand I'm doing me, um, I can't see why we can't get out there, save lives, change lives. Yeah. I one thing I do want to say though, if I do something like that, I just want to bring altar calls back to concerts because I don't understand why, after all this dancing and moving and hair and everything else, so nobody wants to because at John P. Key concerts, when I was coming up, the altar would be full, bruh. They'd be lined up. Now at the concerts, we just got our phones and that's no one's saying it's not even offered to them. It's not even like, is there anyone here, even though this concert was dope? Or if someone's watching today, if somebody's watching right now and you have not given your life to Christ, you know, even while you're watching this, you can renew your life with Christ. He's not trying to like judge you or anything. And there's some PKs who are watching, I'm sure, is like, I'll never deal with church again. I'll never blah blah blah. Never say never, you guys. God can use that pain to ignite someone else's promise. So with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, he will nowise cast out. If you really want to start your works over again with God, he is faithful to forgive. This is between you and him. And trust me, I'm one of them ones I can't stand religion. I feel like it separates and divides people. But I can tell you that Jesus, he's the way, the truth, and the life. You know he's still the one for you. So if you're watching, recommit yourself. Let this be a sign that maybe I can give God another chance. Be me, but still let God have his way in my life. Don't use what people did to you as an excuse to turn your back on God because he never turned his back on you. Period.

Where To Follow And Final Goodbye

SPEAKER_00 53:22

That's it. Listen, thank y'all for tuning in. Be sure to like, subscribe, and follow.

SPEAKER_05 53:29

Oh, yeah. Follow me on B Slay now. B S L A D E now on Instagram. B S L A D E now, um, TikTok X, uh, and B Slay fans on Facebook. Um, plushboy dot plushboy apparel.store.

SPEAKER_00 53:43

Plushboyaparel.store. Check it out. All the things. Don't forget if you like have a design or something and you want some custom stuff, please send it.

SPEAKER_05 53:53

Right here.

SPEAKER_00 53:53

Cause I'm about to figure out how we about to get some PK Pod apparel. Mm-hmm. So stay tuned for that too. Until next time. Be sure to subscribe right now. Click that button. Stay connected so you can be the first to know when our new episodes are dropping. I'll see you there.