🌵The Pain Wasn’t Physical: My Desert Spirit Quest & the Release That Changed Everything (Ep.23)

What if the pain in your body isn’t physical at all?

In this deeply personal and powerful episode, I share my recent spirit quest in the desert and the profound healing that unfolded when I finally discovered the true source of the chronic pain I had been carrying in my body for years.

Through the lens of Akashic healing and the five layers of healing—physical, mental, emotional, energetic, and spiritual—I walk you through how unprocessed experiences, grief, trauma, and suppressed emotions become stored in the body… and how they can finally be released.

I share:

• How different parts of the body hold different emotional and energetic wounds
• Why bodywork alone wasn’t enough to resolve my pain
• The exact process I used to identify, feel, release, and transmute stored trauma
• How soul fragments are lost during painful experiences—and how to reclaim them
• Why shaking is one of the most powerful tools for releasing trauma from the body
• What becomes possible when pain dissolves and your light fully returns

This episode is an invitation—to go inward, to listen to your body, and to release what you were never meant to carry.

✨ If you’re ready to heal, rise, and reclaim your wholeness, this transmission is for you.

Transcript

Hello and welcome back, beautiful soul.
This is Nicole Mixdorf. I am your host. I am an Akashic light healer and intuitive guide, and I want to talk to you today about releasing physical pain from the body.

If you have been listening for a while to this show, you’ll probably already know that there are the five layers of healing. And if you haven’t listened to that episode about the five layers of healing, I encourage you to go check that out. But I’ll talk a little bit about it today.

So the five layers of healing are the physical, mental, emotional, energetic, and spiritual layers. I talk a lot about how when we want to heal our bodies from something that we’re feeling physically inside of us—or mentally or emotionally drained—we have to dig deeper and deeper through all of these different layers.

The one that we play in the most is the physical layer. This is where we do bodywork. This is medications and surgeries and supplements, movement, fitness, sleep—all the things we can do physically.

Now, one thing that has really plagued me for a long time—many, many, many years—is physical pain in my body that I have not been able to understand the source of. And I’ll explain it to you.

It’s been really intense. I have felt it coming from the base of my skull and my jaw, going down my neck, down my shoulders, down my arms. I’ll feel this shooting pain sometimes all the way into my hands. I’ll feel it go down my back, through my hips, through my legs, through my knees, down the sides of my legs like shin splints, all the way to my toes.

I’ve definitely had this tension and pain in my body for at least seven years, since my daughter was born. I think that’s when this pain started down my arms. And it’s been the hardest thing to figure out.

Nicole Mixdorf (02:20)
I’ve gone to get tons of bodywork. I’ve had a million different massages. I’ve done fascia release. I’ve done so many things. I’ve dug in on all levels to try to understand this physical pain that I was carrying and why nothing seemed to work.

Have you ever been in that kind of situation before? Maybe you’re in it now, where you’re carrying some physical pain in the body. Or maybe it’s showing up in a different way. Maybe it’s headaches. Maybe it’s illness. Maybe it’s something else.

But this physical pain—I finally got to the root of it this past weekend. I finally was able to identify it, feel it, release it, let it go. And I feel like a different person.

So I wanted to share the practices that I did in case it’s helpful for you to understand why we do this to ourselves, what this pain is that we might be carrying—because I guarantee you, it’s not what you think it is.

This past weekend, I went to the desert. I went to Joshua Tree on a spirit quest with one of my closest, dearest friends—a sweet, sweet soul sister who is so special to me.

And we had the most incredible experience connecting into ourselves, into our truth, into our knowing, into each other, connecting into the stars and the wisdom, and receiving so many gifts.

In the process of this beautiful healing experience and awakening that I had, I was finally able to tap into what this physical pain has been in my body.

And let me tell you…

Nicole Mixdorf (04:33)
Every single part of my body was connected to something different.

I’ve always felt that it was this full channel of pain that started from the very top and went through every part of my body. I thought it was all one thing—and it is not.

Every part of my body was connected to something different, a painful experience that I went through at some point in this lifetime.

When I do Akashic healing work, I am very deeply connected into past lifetimes and ancestral and generational healing. That’s usually the first place that I go—asking, where did this come from? What created this?

And what was missing for me this whole time was the embodied piece—how to release these things from the physical form.

All of these memories came flooding forward. Times where I was embarrassed and humiliated when I was younger—those were held in certain parts of my body.

One memory that came up was losing my old kitty growing up and not being present when she passed, and feeling like that wasn’t complete for me. That was being held in my wrists and down my arms. I was so surprised when that came up.

Part of the pain was connected to the grief of losing my dad. And honestly, I thought I was done releasing that pain because I’ve released so much already—but there was more, and it was sitting as physical pain in my body.

I had pain connected to religion.
 I had pain connected to my business.
 I had pain connected to the pandemic and everything it did.

When I tell you it was connected to all of these parts of who I am—it really was.

Nicole Mixdorf (06:53)
To finally feel what was behind the physical pain, to go back into the old wound and allow myself the sacred space to cry it out, to feel into it, and allow the tears that I once suppressed to finally come out…

All of the belief systems that I created and took on as truth from every single one of those experiences—beliefs that were no longer in my highest good—to be able to let those go was so transformative.

To release the energy cords that were holding me in those painful experiences and draining me…

And to see so clearly how these experiences were blocking me. Blocking my success. Blocking me from moving forward. Blocking me from being seen. Blocking my voice.

That realization was so insightful and so powerful.

I kept going through my body, asking: What is this pain in my jaw? And a memory would surface. And I would feel it, release it, clear it.

The physical pain was simply the physical manifestation of an emotional wound, an energetic wound, a spiritual wound that I had been holding.

When I cleared it in my Akashic Records and sent light codes of activation and healing to myself—my God—it changed everything.

Nicole Mixdorf (08:52)
This is the exact same process that I walk my clients through.

When we go into the Akashic Records, we’re tapping into the subconscious—the memories of the soul from this lifetime and all lifetimes.

We uncover the source. We receive the wisdom. We identify energetic connections that are draining us and clear them.

Then we activate the opposite frequency.

If we release humiliation, we call in confidence, peace, and wholeness.
 If we release grief, we call in love.

Part of this work is reclaiming lost pieces of the soul.

When we go through trauma, fragments of ourselves can get stuck in those moments. This often shows up as anxiety, disconnection, or feeling incomplete.

When we reclaim those pieces, people feel peace for the first time in their lives.

Sometimes we lose confidence. Sometimes we lose trust, faith, compassion, or truth. And when we identify what was lost, we reclaim that too.

Nicole Mixdorf (11:19)
As I cleared all of these painful experiences that were physically stored in my body—real pain, stabbing pain when I touched it—it released.

Now when I dig into my jaw, it doesn’t hurt anymore. There’s still tension I can work out, but the sharp pain is gone.

Now I know that when I go to a massage therapist, it will finally release completely and not keep coming back—because the root has been cleared.

I feel so free.
 So light.
 So at peace in my body in a way I haven’t felt in years, maybe ever.

This awakening in the desert expanded my ability to receive, channel, hold, and share light. I deeply connected into my divine feminine energy—this goddess energy that had been dormant in my body.

I feel ancient wisdom lighting up within me even more.

Nicole Mixdorf (16:05)
My purpose is to help you awaken to your own truth, your own light, your own gifts.

This journey is about remembering who you are.

As I heal myself, I give you permission to heal yourself.
 As I step into my power, I give you permission to step into yours.
 As I find my voice, I give you permission to find yours.
 As I allow myself to be seen, I give you permission to be seen.

If you feel called to go within and release what you’ve been carrying—physically, emotionally, energetically, spiritually—I would be honored to guide you.

Every layer of pain you release makes you lighter. More connected. More aligned.

Creativity flows. Manifestation becomes effortless. Life shifts into ease, flow, receiving.

Nicole Mixdorf (20:42)
The next step after releasing is to shake it out of the body.

Shake your arms. Shake your legs. Shake your head. Move it out.

I stood in the desert and shook my body for ten minutes straight. That’s how trauma leaves the body.

Then you breathe.
 And you feel alive.

You are not meant to carry pain where you are going. You cannot take it with you.

There is a divine feminine awakening happening on this planet. We are being called to rise, to restore balance, to shed what no longer serves us.

If you need help remembering who you are and why you’re here, I am here for you.

Thank you for receiving this transmission from my heart to yours.

And if you feel the call, book a one-on-one Akashic Healing Journey with me. I would love to support you.